


Subject 204

by StefiDelly



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, F/F, Lab Rat AU, Science Experiment AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2018-10-20 02:29:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 37
Words: 233,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10653057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StefiDelly/pseuds/StefiDelly
Summary: Belle is accepted into an exclusive internship at a facility that studies supernatural occurrences, gifted individuals and cryptids. Something about their methods rubs Belle the wrong way, but she tries to let it slide… until she finds out about Subject 204.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’m pretty hyped up about this and have up to at least chapter five already written out, so for this week, redbeautyweek , I’ll try to release a chapter a day and then possibly slow down after, depending on how well I fare with time management. So here goes. 
> 
> Trigger Warnings: For this chapter, nothing major, but later down the line, there would probably be blood and abuse. It’s kind of just danced around in this chapter.

Heart pounding violently against her chest, fists clenched so hard her fingernails were cutting into her palms, the subject grit her teeth and breathed through her nose, air coming in and out short and fast.

The metal clamped around her wrists were lined with silver, burning hot against her raw skin.

"Just relax, dearie." Though the words on their own were supposed to be comforting, the tone was almost mocking. The head scientist's smile hovered over her face and it looked almost predatory.

Rough palms pressed against her cheek and the woman tried to turn her head away but the collar around her neck left her with little room for movement. The only choice was to clench her jaw and screw her eyes shut as his hands caressed her damp face before running fingers through her unwashed hair.

He brushed her hair back then grabbed a fistful in his hand, forcing her to tilt her head up and pulling just enough to signal for her to open her eyes and look at him.

"You know dearie," the scientist practically purred the words in a slimy voice that still made her cringe. "It would be so much more convenient." Pinpricks of pain ran through her scalp as he pulled just a little harder. "If we just got rid of this."

A snarl rumbled in her throat as she tried to jerk her head away from his hand, only for the collar to burn against her neck. She coughed as the metal pressed against her throat when she tried to shake her head free.

His grip tightened and he yanked her head back down. She gasped as the back of her skull hit the metal table she was strapped to.

"Now there's no need for that." The scientist spoke to her like she was either a small child or a misbehaving dog. "We'll keep that mane of yours then."

Brushing her hair back again, he started putting in the scanners and wires she'd almost gotten used to having all over her skull. "For now."

* * *

Excitement bubbled through Belle as she set aside her notebooks, tablet, pens, books and forms. She'd already packed up her bag several times the night before but here she was again, doing it for… well, she'd lost count by now how many times she'd packed and repacked her things.

This was the opportunity of a lifetime and she couldn't stand the thought of not being appropriately prepared with all the items she needed.

The paperwork was probably the most important part. The acceptance letter, the bio data, some additional 1x1 ID pictures. Those things, if left behind would be the most humiliating disaster.

But maybe she needed some other things too? Some of her reference books perhaps? Or her notes and research? Or the thesis papers that helped get her accepted? Would they need that? Was she overthinking?

" _BELLE_!" Her father called from the living room. "You'd better get moving or you're going to be late for your first day! What's the hold up?"

"C-coming!" Belle scurried from one end of her room to the other then back to her bag, deciding at the last minute to leave her thesis files and just go basic with the forms, a notebook and some pens. She hesitated for a moment before deciding to bring her tablet as well since that at least had a softcopy of her thesis.

Her father was already waiting at the front door by the time Belle finally went out of her room, bag at her shoulder. She took her keys from him, gave him a goodbye kiss and headed for her car. The drive to the facility was longer than usual and even if Belle had already been there once at Dr. Gold's invitation to apply, it was hard to remember the route because of her excitement. Thank the universe for waze.

By the time she arrived, parked, signed in, Belle felt just about ready to explode with anticipation. She was joined by a few other people also accepted into the internship. They were told to wait in a lounge with cushioned black seats and white walls.

Nobody was interested in making conversation. Two of the others took to studying their forms and getting things in other, another scrolled through her phone.

Belle obsessively counted the seconds and minutes that passed. One thousand three hundred fifty-six. Fifty-seven. Fifty-eight. Fifty nine seconds. One thousand three hundred and sixty seconds.

The door opened. Belle fidgeted in her seat as a small, scrawny man strode in. His hair was slicked back and his labcoat was neatly pressed. An aura of power and authority was enough to counteract what he lacked in height.

"Good morning, dearies." With a twinkle in his eye, he smiled at them all. A few gold teeth caught in the light. "As you know, I am Doctor Robert Gold and the four of you alone were accepted into this program. However, only one of you," Dr. Gold made eye contact with Belle and she fidgeted wth her phone in her hands. "…will be chosen to work with our staff fulltime at the end of the program."

One of the other girls eyed everyone else with an expression somewhere between challenging and suspicious. Belle wondered if there was a lot at stake for her.

"Now," Dr. Gold pulled a remote out of his pocket and pushed a button.

The screen behind him lit up and a photo of a young woman came onscreen, looking to be roughly Belle's age, with a scar on her lip and wavy, shoulder-length hair.

"This," Pushing another button to activate the lazer pointer, Dr. Gold encircled the picture. "Is Subject 201, Regina Mills."

The next slide showed Regina's file.

* * *

_Name:_ Regina Mills

 _Age_ : 23

 _Hair:_ Black

 _Eyes:_ Brown

 _Distinguishing Features_ : Scar across lip

 _Abilities_ : Telekinesis, underdeveloped biokinesis and pyrokinesis, potential ESP, one recorded instance of levitation; has shown ability to accelerate healing and regeneration.

 _Other notes:_ May have undiagnosed mental illness, prone to temper tantrums. Highly intelligent. Student leader in high school and elementary.

* * *

Dr. Gold allowed them time to read through the file for a minute or two, then he stepped in front of the screen. "Off the record, we suspect there may also be abuse of some sort, though it's difficult to say since she refuses to discuss her home situation."

A push of the button showed another face onscreen. "This is her mother, Cora Mills. We have limited records of her that are up to date, but a few decades ago, in her adolescent years she was tested for similar abilities and paid a small allowance by the facility. She refuses now to be tested, but has offered her daughter for testing in exchange for a stipend."

The girl who was suspiciously eyeing everyone a moment ago raised her hand. Dr. Gold nodded to her. "So are you saying that you think the mom is just using her kid for money?"

Scratching at his stubbly chin, Dr. Gold paused a moment before shrugging. "We're not psychologists, but, off the record, yes, dearie. I believe that may be the case."

"If that may be the case," Belle found herself thinking out loud, "Do you think she could be at risk of losing control of her abilities if her emotional stability is questionable?"

She wrung her hands together, recalling her research on correlations between emotion and psychic abilities. "You mentioned in your notes that she may have undiagnosed mental illness and said yourself that abuse in her household is possible."

Gesturing dismissively, almost feeling like her thought might not be valid, "I mean this is hypothetical of course, but if her household and her emotional state are unstable, as you suspect, would you say there's a correlation between the prominence of her abilities now and her heightened emotional state?"

Dr. Gold nodded and his smile made the gold in his teeth gleam. "Yes, dearie, exactly! There has been a peak in her abilities of late, and the recorded instance of levitation is very recent. The pyrokinesis? It's always when she's being particularly snippy towards our staff."

"So," The other girl toyed with her pen while side-eyeing Belle, "If she may be approaching a breakdown, we want to see if that triggers a peak in her abilities and therefore have that peak on record?"

"Exactly, Tamara, dearie." Dr. Gold put his hands in his pockets and shrugged, "Not that we want someone to suffer an emotional breakdown, of course. But this case we're studying now has the potential to lead to some breakthroughs."

Something about the situation rubbed Belle the wrong way. It felt… _wrong_ to be hoping for a person to have an emotional breakdown just so they could see if it would trigger a surge in supernatural abilities. Wasn't that unethical?

Belle squirmed in her seat and bit her lip before racing her hand.

"Yes, Belle?"

The giddiness she got at hearing her name on Dr. Gold's lips was stupid and Belle tried to swallow that feeling down so she could speak, "Should we be… _worried_ about her though?"

"We…" Dr. Gold shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "Well, we are concerned. But like I said, we're scientists studying her abilities, not psychologists. It's not our place to counsel her, really. Just study her."

Belle nodded, torn between her discomfort with the ethical implications and her own juvenile eagerness to please the prestigious scientist.

"Moving on," Dr. Gold shut off the screen. "There's another subject I'll be allowing you to study later on, but for now, who wants to meet Subject 201?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as I post this, I've already started working on chapter seven, and I've decided, that yeah, Swan Queen will most likely be a thing. Emma is introduced a few chapters from now but I think it'll be worth it coz she's snarky af. For now, you'll have troubled Regina in this chapter. I'd srsly appreciate follows and reviews if you're into doing that. I plan to post the next chapter tomorrow, maybe around this time as well.

Subject 204.

The lights were bright. Blinding and still seeping through her eyelids when she tried to close them.

Subject 204.

Her wrists felt raw and sore, burnt by the cuffs touching her skin. Her hair felt greasy and limp around her face. Her skin felt grimy in her palms.

"Subject 204."

When was the last time they'd washed her? She felt like an animal.

" _Subject 204._ "

She lunged forward with a snarl, teeth bared, claws extended towards the speaker. The cuffs burnt against her wrists as the chain was pulled taut.

"Take it easy." It wasn't Gold this time. It was another man, just a bit younger, with a wide forehead and a receding hairline. He still sounded slimy. What was his name again? Dolphin? No, it was a water creature but not that. Shark seemed appropriate.

The man was standing just out of reach. He was at the door to her cell and holding an electric prod. Like she was cattle.

"It's me, Dr. Whale, remember?" Right. Whale. Shark still seemed more appropriate. The prod sparked as he activated it.

"Now there's two ways this can go and to be honest, I'd really rather you just cooperate and did this the easy way. I don't want to be the kind of scientist that has to use force on the test subjects."

Clenching and unclenching her hands to ease her claws back into fingernails, she glanced over to see the security behind the scientist. There were two she didn't recognize but there was one- Asian, Chinese, maybe- who usually tried to be gentle.

She closed her eyes, then slowly exhaled.

Did she have a choice, really? They said they were doing whatever they could to find the cure for her.

That's what she wanted, wasn't it?

"Come on, 204." Dr. Whale tapped the side of the prod against his palm. "Let's do this the easy way. Face the wall, hands behind your back so we can adjust the cuffs."

With great effort, she forced her tense muscles to relax. The chains rattled against the floor as she turned to face the wall, as instructed. Her heart beat hard and fast against her chest as the anxiety started setting in, as it always did before every session of testing.

Maybe if she cooperated, they'd let her have a bath.

She'd been difficult lately. The wolf was getting aggressive. Harder to keep at bay.

She needed to. Calm. Down.

Slow, even breathing.

In.

And out.

Her heart was still pounding away at her chest but her breathing was calm as she crossed her wrists behind her back and kept her eyes on the wall.

* * *

"Okay, Regina, dearie." Dr. Gold pointed towards them. As Belle understood it, the subject couldn't see them since on her side, the glass was just a mirror. It was hard to resist the urge to wave anyway. Tamara cast a judgmental glance at Belle's way, probably noticing the awkward movement. "I have some interns watching from the other side of the glass."

Dr. Gold's voice reached the interns through the speakers. "Let's just run through our basic exercises so they can see how these things usually go."

Regina's voice was sullen. "Yes, sir."

On the way to this part of the facility, Dr. Gold told them a little bit more about Regina and said that she would tend to hover between two modes- quiet and sullen or cranky and aggressive. Meanwhile, her mother was a very agitated person, prone to bursts of anger and a tendency to be obsessive about control.

"Good girl," Dr. Gold went up behind Regina and setup the sensors to track the brainwaves and any other changes and anomalies that could correlate with the use of her abilities. "Now let's start with something easy."

Taking a coin out from his pocket, he put it on the desk in front of Regina.

"Easy enough. Move the coin from here," Dr. Gold tapped the other end of the table, "…to here. Can you do that for me, dearie?"

Regina nodded.

Belle watched as Regina focused on the coin and it began to move slowly. The monitors tracked data such as the brainwaves, heart rate and breathing. There was a spike at first, then a decline as the coin slowed to a stop just at the edge of the table.

"Very good!" Gold's teeth flashed, "Now, let's try something a little heavier."

On the monitors, Regina's heartbeat showed a slight escalation. Maybe she was nervous? Belle found herself starting to take notes even if they hadn't been asked to yet. Tamara was doing the same as well.

Dr. Gold placed a small weighted ball in front of Regina. "Still very easy for you, but it always helps when we warm up first."

Regina just shrugged.

"Move it forward, just like with the coin."

The readings were consistent as Regina rolled the ball forward the same way she slid the coin to the edge.

"Now." Dr. Gold reached into his bag again and produced a thermos. There was a spike in the readings and what looked like a confused expression on Regina's face. "It's just tea in here, nothing exceptional."

"Are we going to drink it?" Regina asked dryly.

That got a bit of a chuckle out of Dr. Gold as he uncapped the thermos and put it in front of Regina. "This time, I want you to work on your precision. I want you to ensure that you don't spill a single drop." Dr. Gold pointed to the far corner of the room. "And gently put it down over there."

Regina's heartbeat was really picking up now. She was nervous about this.

"Excuse me," Belle whispered to the scientist monitoring the readings. He had thick glasses and red hair. There was clear reluctance in the way he had to tear his eyes away from the screens. Belle could almost feel Tamara's judgmental glare. "Is this an exercise she's done before?"

The scientist seemed surprised by the question and shook his head before returning his gaze to the readings. "She's done similar exercises of moving stuff around and Dr. Gold usually has her work on the strength of her abilities but this level of precision hasn't been required of her before."

There was a tag on the scientist's coat that read Hopper. "Thank you, Dr. Hopper."

A smile broke out on the man's face as he gave Belle another quick glance before returning his attention to the monitors. He pointed at Regina's heartrate. "That would explain why over here, her heartbeat's going pretty fast. She's nervous, but I think she can do this."

"Could she also be nervous because she knows we're watching her?" The question came from another intern. Aurora was her name, if Belle remembered correctly.

Dr. Hopper nodded. "That's a strong possibility as well. I notice she gets nervous when she remembers she's being observed. Wait! Look, she's starting to do it!"

They all took returned their attention to Regina's use of her abilities and the connected readings.

The thermos was shaking as it rose from the table. There was a look of intense concentration on Regina's face and her brow was furrowed. She pursed her lips and the scar was highlighted more visibly.

Still unsteady, the thermos slowly moved past Dr. Gold and towards the far corner of the room. The readings were going crazy, everything was spiking. As the thermos got closer to its destination, there was a huge spike in the readings and Regina winced visibly. The thermos faltered and started to fall.

"No!"

Regina stood abruptly, hand extended.

Not only did the thermos stop in mid-air, but the tea it contained did, too. It was frozen in the middle of spilling over, just inches from reaching the ground.

With a trembling hand, Regina made a gesture. The thermos righted itself and the tea retreated back into it. Then it slowly, gently lowered itself to the floor.

The concentration had taken its toll on Regina and she was breathing heavily as she sat back down.

"Well done!" Dr. Gold's nod of approval was emphasized by another one of his wide smiles. "Now, there are a few more things I'd like you to do."

"What? Now? _Really_?" Regina was agitated now. She rubbed at her temples, "I'd rather take a break."

"Come now, dearie. I know you're capable of so much more."

Regina banged a fist against the table. "I think I'd rather not continue for today."

"I believe you can do this, dearie." Dr. Gold put an encouraging hand over Regina's clenched fist. "Besides, you and I both know your powers are at their strongest when you're agitated."

With a jaw clenched so tight, Belle could see the defined muscle along it, Regina nodded and leaned back against the char. She slid her hand out from under Dr. Gold's. "Fine."

They carried out a few more exercises of lifting and moving things around, with increasing weight and with more complicated movements like making things form circles or wavy lines on their path to a destination.

It was starting to obviously strain Regina and even Dr. Hopper looked like he was trying to hide his concern. Belle could see it in his eyes as he clasped a hand over his mouth fidgeted in his seat.

Finally, they were done when Dr. Gold said they were done.

And something about it rubbed Belle the wrong way. She wasn't sure how to process how he pushed Regina well past her comfort zone.

It did achieve the results he wanted, didn't it?

On one hand, Regina was capable of doing what he asked. She was severely strained and dehydrated after, but she was… well… as okay as can be given the toll the exercises took on her. It wasn't like she passed out or had any nosebleeds or anything.

She… she could do it.

Dr. Gold dismissed Regina for the day, telling her she could pick up her allowance at the reception. Wordlessly, she left the room.

Looking pleased with himself, Dr. Gold exited the testing room and came to join them in the monitoring room. He looked over the interns, "So, what were your observations?"

They discussed what they noticed, and it was clinical at first- the correlation between the heartrate and the way she prepared herself before an exercise; the heavy breathing that came with the strain of the more difficult tasks; the brain activity tied to each exercise.

Eventually though, Belle couldn't help but voice her concern, "I noticed though that she was under a lot of stress… would the results have been different if she was in more of a relaxed state?"

Dr. Gold shrugged, "It's hard to relax a subject that's prone to anxiety and agitation and whatever else is bothering her. But I do see your point, Belle. We could try having a more controlled, relaxing environment for her tomorrow and see if we get different results. Would you like to be in charge of guiding her through the exercises tomorrow?"

Tamara's jaw dropped.

Belle just found herself staring. Did she hear that right?

"Uh… s-sure! Yes! I-" Belle fumbled over what to say, "Thank you for the opportunity, sir!"

Though there was still some discomfort in the pit of her stomach, Belle couldn't help but feel excitement at the prospect of what was to come tomorrow. She could barely wait to tell her father about this tonight.

Just then, another scientist came into the room, looking frazzled. There was what looked like blood on his sleeve as he cradled a bandaged hand. "Boss, I want to talk to you. It's about 204."

"Not now, Whale, I'm in the middle of-" Dr. Gold stopped as the scientist leaned over to whisper in his ear. Belle thought she caught words like "Feral." and "Out of control".

"Yes… yes… and we did notice a connection between her control and the variables we've been introducing recently. But what about the test I told you to make? How did she respond to the stimuli?" Dr. Gold listened while gesturing dismissively at the interns. "We'll continue tomorrow. You're dismissed."

As Dr. Hopper herded them out, Belle noticed how hastily and nervously he moved.

Just before the door closed behind them, Belle heard another odd exchange.

"But is she still fighting it?"

"Yes sir, I believe so."

That caught Belle's interest. She turned to the others and saw that Aurora seemed intrigued too.

"Do you think that could be Emma? The other volunteer subject he mentioned?"

Belle shook her head, "I'm not sure, but I think he said Emma Swan was 223." Because they only brushed over the other subject, Belle hadn't been able to take a lot of notes about her. It would be interesting though if she _was_ the subject they were referring to.

But her instinct was telling her that it was someone else, and the way Dr. Whale spoke about 204 almost like he was referring to an animal was offputting. It was possible that they were indeed referring to an animal test subject. But the words they used and the phrases… it wans't adding up.

Hopefully tomorrow would bring more answers.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a Ruby-centric chapter that hurt to write and it shows us what happened to Whale's hand. Comment or kudos if you're up for it and I will love you 5ever.

The smell of food reached her, making her stomach rumble. It brought attention to how little she'd been fed lately. There was a hollow, painful feeling that came with being starved. Sometimes it was like claws were trying to get out from inside of her.

Smoky, that was probably the best description for the smell. Steak, maybe. Dribbling with juices at the first slice. Accompanied by mashed potatoes, gravy. Hell, she was starving and would almost be content to just have the vegetables on the side.

"Ah, you smell that, don't you?" Dr. Whale led the procession to another room.

At the exact moment that he opened the door, the scents blasted her nostrils. In her starved state, her senses were at an all-time high and she could practically taste the meat already.

Without thinking, she lunged forward, teeth bared, mouth watering.

The collar around her neck jolted her windpipe as the guards behind her pulled the chain taut. A snarl ripped itself out of her throat as she struggled against the guards pulling her back. Her shoulders strained to separate her wrists cuffed behind her back.

A jolt of electricity ran through her body. She yelped as it caused her muscles to spasm then go limp. With no control over her limbs, she collapsed to the floor, where the guards didn't hesitate to put their weight on top of her.

Knees were pushed down across her back and a rough hand pressed her head against the floor.

She could have struggled against them. The damn curse that afflicted her gave her the strength to overpower several men twice her size.

But that was when she was at her peak, and in an open space that left her with room to escape.

This was a situation where struggle was futile.

And, she reminded herself, she wanted to be cured, didn't she? These tests and exercises were all supposed to cure her.

That's what they told her.

"Sorry about that, 204." Dr. Whale took a seat at the table. "There was a closed meeting led by Dr. Gold yesterday."

Warmth was pressing against the backs of her eyeballs, sharpening her vision, allowing her to hyperfocus on the juices gushing out of the steak as he sliced it into cubes. She licked her lips, lightly scraping her tongue over her sharpening teeth.

The wolf was trying to get out again.

If what she was feeling was any indication, her eyes were probably already amber and her teeth were lengthening into fangs.

She closed her eyes, forced her rapid breathing to slow by sucking deep breaths of air in through her nose and exhaling through her mouth.

"That's it," one of the guards whispered, hand on her shoulder, "Just breathe."

That was the Asian guard. The very nice guard. Mei was her name, right? Ming? No, that wasn't right.

Mila?

Close.

But no.

What was this guard's name?

"Open your eyes, 204." Dr. Whale's voice was deceptively light, and just like Gold, he chastised her like a misbehaving child or animal. "You're being rude. Look at me while I'm talking to you."

A grip on her hair forced her head up. It put strain on her neck and shoulders, but it got the message across.

She opened her eyes.

There was no burning feeling anymore, and her teeth didn't hurt. The wolf was hiding again.

More or less.

Ever since she was brought into this facility, it was like the line between wolf and… her… _self_ was becoming more and more blurred.

"Good," Dr. Whale smirked, then popped the meat into his mouth. She could hear him chewing it slowly. Her stomach grumbled again as he dabbed at his lips with a napkin then proceeded to spoon more food into his mouth.

It felt like an eternity before he put his utensils down and spoke again. "Now, I can't say much about the meeting, but a good portion of it does pertain to your case."

It shouldn't be this hard to focus on his words. All her mind wanted to process was the smell of the food filling the air and blasting her and making her want nothing more than to just _eat_.

"We're trying to study still the triggers that bring out your… condition." He paused to chew on a particularly big, savory piece. "Once we have a better idea of the boundaries and limits of your condition, we'll be able to work on… well," He gestured with his hands, putting them a small distance apart from each other and then moving them closer together.

She couldn't help but constantly glance between his hands and the food.

"Adjusting the scope of your condition." Dr. Whale continued. "We feel that may be the best way to gain some control over it and cure it."

There wasn't much food left.

Still, a few slices remained, and not all the vegetables were consumed and if her nose was to be believed, there was still a great deal of sauce coating the plate. If she could just… just _lick_ the sauce on the plate, it would take the edge off of her hunger.

Slowly, deliberately, Dr. Whale picked up the plate and stood. With the same pace, he approached her.

Her mouth watered and she squirmed, trying to lift herself higher to reach it but that only put more strain on her back, neck and shoulders.

"Gaston," Dr. Whale handed the plate to the guard holding her by the hair. The leftovers were so close. _So_. Close. "Dispose of this and come back with the food we prepared for 204."

"Yes, sir." Gaston released her hair and took the plate away.

"Help 204 up." Dr. Whale instructed the remaining guards, who none too gently pulled her to her feet. "You may have noticed there was a major reduction to your rations in the past week."

She winced as her stomach rumbled audibly.

"We're trying to study the correlation between your condition and a new variable that was brought up during the meeting. _Hunger_."

Furrowing her brow, she cocked her head to one side.

Dr. Whale just nodded. "Yes, 204. Hunger. We know for a fact that your… alternate…" He paused, as if trying to find the right words, " _form_. Has a tendency to eat that which it kills."

Flashes of her sins went through her mind. Of her schoolmates. Majority of those she attacked did survive, if she were to believe what she'd been told. But Peter…

A different kind of warmth gathered behind her eyes, this time making them water instead of turn amber.

There was little left of Peter for the authorities to identify.

And it was all her fault. She was the one who invited him over. She was the one who wanted him to see her. She lured him into a trap and...

"Now now, there's no need for that." Dr. Whale shook his head. Snapping his fingers at the nice guard, he gave an order. "Get a rag or something. Wipe her eyes or whatever."

"Yes, sir." The nice guard pulled her own handkerchief out from her pocket and moved in front of the subject. "Hey, take it easy, okay?"

There was a gentleness to the way she cupped the subject's cheek, but an involuntary shudder still ran through her tense body. She clenched her jaw and closed her eyes as the guard dabbed at the corners of her lids.

"I'm sorry." The words were whispered so softly, it might have been imagined.

Satisfied, Dr. Whale continued speaking when the guard stepped back into her position by the subject's shoulder. "Where were we?"

Just… focus on breathing in and out.

Breathing tended to help keep her calm.

She forced herself to make eye contact with Dr. Whale and listen to what else he had to say. "Since your alternate form has shown a tendency to eat its kills," He sounded so clinical about it, meanwhile she felt like knives were stabbing into her chest as she recalled the blood and savagery. "We want to see how hunger in this current state will affect your other state."

They were here to cure her.

She had to trust that.

She nodded.

Another smell hit her and she recognized it, but it filled her with contrasting emotions. Her stomach rumbled again and her mouth started to water, but her heart beat fast and her breathing sped up.

Gaston arrived with a metal container. She couldn't see what was inside but she could smell it.

"Maybe leash her to the wall," Dr. Whale instructed, "And uncuff her so she can enjoy her meal."

Were they… serious?

A part of her was disgusted, but another part of her… was hungry.

The guards pulled and pushed her towards the corner of the room where the chain hooked up to the collar around her neck could be linked to bolts on the floor. Two stood at the ready, brandishing prods while the nice guard- Mulan, that was her name. Mulan Li. Why was it getting harder to remember these things? Harder to think? Harder to think like a human being?

Not that she deserved to be called one.

She was a monster, after all.

The cuffs linking her wrists behind her back weren't removed but Mulan did unclasp them from each other.

Being allowed to put her hands in front of her again was a relief and she rolled her shoulders to loosen them up. The wary eyes the guards had on her made her uneasy.

She felt like a dangerous animal.

She _was_ a dangerous animal.

"I suggest you sit," Dr. Whale took the container from Gaston and approached her. "That way, you can eat more comfortably."

They were really going to feed her that. Could there maybe still be a chance that this was some sort of joke? A small part of her hoped that was the case.

But a glance at Mulan, seeing the nod she gave, that told Subject 204 that this wasn't a trick. She was going to finally be fed a big meal after measly portions once a day the past few days.

The hunger was there, it really was.

But _that_?

Reluctantly, she lowered herself to a crouch on the floor.

The satisfied smirk on Dr. Whale's face made her shudder. He crouched down in front of her and placed the container on the floor.

"Ready?" He didn't wait for an answer. She hadn't spoken a word in… days? Weeks? She didn't even know anymore how long she'd been in here.

Dr. Whale removed the cover and the scent that blasted out was even stronger now.

It smelled…

So.

 _Good_.

Clenching her jaw, she fought the urge to reach a clawed hand into the container and devour what was in front of her.

It was meat.

 _Raw_. Meat.

There were chunks of it and it was all still so red and just… so _red_.

This _had_ to be some kind of test.

She clenched her fists, digging her claws into her palms and inching backwards until her spine was pressed up against the wall behind her. The craving for that was making her stomach clench. A strong, nearly overpowering part of her wanted to eat it. Wanted to reach in and sink fangs into it and tear into it and let the blood dribble down her chin and let the rawness of it tickle her tongue.

The emptiness in her stomach was sharp, biting, clawing.

With gritted teeth, she shook her head.

"Come now, don't be rude." Dr. Whale pulled a plastic glove over his hand and reached into the container. He pulled out a particularly thick, juicy slab and held it in front of her, perfectly within reach. "We bought and prepared this just for you."

The meat was so close to her face now. Its scent was enveloping her and every part of her was just screaming for her to take it, eat it, _devour_ it.

What was _wrong_ with her?

She pressed the back of her head against the wall, craning her neck up and tilting her head as far away from the meat as possible.

"Take. It." Dr. Whale's voice wasn't as friendly now. It was cold and commanding.

It smelled so good.

Shaking her head, she pressed herself against the corner of the room, wishing she could shrink into it.

"I know you're starving," Dr. Whale continued, "Why don't you take a bite? Just one?"

With a growl, she swiped at his extended hand, hated herself for relishing in her claws cutting through his glove and digging into his skin, hating herself for enjoying the scream that wrenched out of him.

This wasn't who she wanted to be. She wanted to be cured. She wanted to be _normal_.

She swiped again, this time sending the container flying across the room. It smashed into the far wall, denting it before landing in a heap on the ground. This had to be a test and she hoped she'd passed it by resisting the meat. Resisting the calling to eat like an animal.

" _Fucking bitch_!" Dr. Whale cradled his scratched hand. It wasn't bleeding too badly, but the scent of fresh blood made her skin heat up. She locked her eyes on the cut and felt the hunger claw deeper against her insides. "Take it away!"

Growling, she moved to swipe at the guards coming for her but they were faster. A prod pushed past her arm and shot at her ribs, sending jolts of electricity through her body. She spasmed and her limbs felt like jelly but she was angry and hungry and she tried again, launching herself at the nearest guard- Gaston?

More prods jabbed at her and she screamed and thrashed and snarled until they overpowered her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reviews are great for the soul. I got such satisfying feedback for the last chapter collectively over ff, ao3 and tumblr that I felt compelled to post this one a good day sooner than I'd originally planned. So here, have some Regina and Belle.

Regina was in an irritable mood.

The tests were clearly aggravating her and Belle felt guilt settling in the pit of her stomach as Dr. Gold's voice came over the earpiece, "Tell her to try again. Clockwise twice, counterclockwise thrice, then back on the floor. What she did was the other way around."

This didn't feel right. Belle bit her lip.

"Come now, dearie. You were already doing well with your instructions, and the notes you took this morning were invaluable." The praise coming in over the earpiece warmed Belle. Not enough to push the guilt away entirely, but just enough to get through this session.

"Regina," Belle reached a hand over to touch the young woman's clenched fist. At the contact, she moved her hand back and glared at Belle. "Sorry…"

Choosing not to respond verbally, Regina looked away, continuing to glare at the weighted box she'd been trying to move around for the past hour. Air pushed through her lips in a soft huff.

There had to be a nicer way to do this.

Belle cleared her throat and tried again, "I'm sorry, Regina… but if you don't mind too much, could you please try again?"

With a deep sigh, Regina turned to face Belle. At this close distance, sitting across each other, Belle could take in more details. In the picture that Dr. Gold flashed, Regina seemed younger, closer to Belle's age of twenty-one.

Up close, Regina's eyes were deep and tired. Dehydration must be setting in since her lips looked dry, making the scar stand out more clearly. There weren't any notes in her file about the scar. Not any notes that Belle had access to anyway. Dr. Gold seemed to still be holding back on giving them all of the data. It was possible that he was still feeling out how much he could trust his interns and how well they could connect dots even with missing data.

There was still the question of the other subject he was supposed to introduce them to.

"Look." Regina leaned forward across the table. The piercing look in her dark eyes made Belle shrink back into her own chair. "I'm tired and I barely got any sleep last night. I hate being here and I hate doing this but I don't have much of a choice, do I?"

"Deescalate." Dr. Gold's voice came into Belle's ear. "Calm her down."

"Hey," Belle licked her lips and straightened up in her chair. Confrontation made her uncomfortable, but Dr. Gold was watching. The other interns were watching too. _Tamara_ was probably already rolling her eyes at this point. For the umpteenth time. "Just… just remember why you started doing this in the first place. You wanted to have a better grasp of your abilities, right?"

"Abilities." Regina huffed. "I wish I didn't have them. I'd rather _not_ have them than have control of them." After a pause, she flashed a quick smile. "Although a funnier word for what I'm dealing with is superpowers, right?"

Belle wasn't sure how to respond.

"Do you read comics or watch movies?" Regina was leaning forward so far, she was nearly standing from her chair. "Who am I? Am I Jean Gray? Or Eleven? Or am I the bad guy?"

"Please, Regina," Belle tried to keep the tremor from her voice. "I'm sorry if what I said offended you. I just-"

"Just what?" Regina snapped. "Calm down and be the little lab rat you all want us to be?"

"Just stand your ground, Belle, dearie." Dr. Gold's voice came through the earpiece again. "We'll send security into the room to assist you."

"No, wait." Belle lifted a hand and spoke out loud.

Regina was standing up now, fists clenched, eyes piercing into Belle. The table was starting to rattle and Belle felt her own seat starting to heat up. "Wait for what?"

"Wait, Dr. Gold." Belle glanced from Regina to the mirror then back to Regina. "Let me try again."

Just when Belle thought the intense look in Regina's eyes couldn't get any more unnerving, it _did_. The chair that Belle was sitting on was getting too hot and she scrambled out of it. "What are you hoping to accomplish, dear?"

"You're tired, you're upset, you're frustrated." Belle had both her hands in front of her, hoping to show that she meant no harm. "I can see that and I acknowledge that. You have every right to be feeling the way you do."

Regina still looked agitated, but the table stopped rattling now. "And?"

"And that's okay." Belle waved her hands in a vague gesture meant to encompass a wide range of things. "Life, _everything_ is frustrating. It all just sucks sometimes, and I won't pretend to know what you're going through and I won't pretend to know how you feel."

There was still a suspicious look in Regina's eyes but she had obviously deflated. There was no longer tension in her shoulders and her hands were more loosely resting on the table. She looked more like she was just leaning on it than putting weight on it.

"I'll be honest with you," Belle continued, "I don't know if there's a cure for what you're dealing with and I don't know how far along their studies are in finding a cure. We're just at the stage where we're trying to understand and control what's going on with you."

Regina moved her hands off of the table and leaned back on her chair, folding her arms across her chest instead. Her voice was soft as she returned her gaze to the box. "So I've been told."

"But think of it this way, maybe?" Belle kept her voice light, hoping to be as comforting as she could be. "If we could help you gain better control of your abilities, you would be more capable of _not_ using them, right?"

An arched eyebrow accompanied the look Regina gave Belle. The suggestion seemed to catch the woman's interest.

"Your abilities manifest most strongly when you're under duress, right?" Belle said, "If you can maintain control of them under pressure, that control can include both using them and _not_ using them."

The look on Regina's face was difficult to read as she clenched and unclenched her jaw.

"Wouldn't that be pretty close to not having them?" Belle asked, "The control to both using them and not using them could be as close as you can get to not having them. What do you think?"

There was no immediate response, but Regina did start to relax the tense set to her shoulders. She clasped her hands and put them on top of the table, still not ready to speak. It was clear though that she was mulling over Belle's words.

"Do you think…" Regina glanced at the mirror, "Do you think that's why he keeps pushing me to use them even when I'm getting agitated?"

Moving as slowly and nonthreateningly as she could, Belle sat back down on her own chair. It wasn't heated anymore.

"I think so."

There was a pause.

Finally, Regina nodded. "I'll try again."

The sigh of relief that rushed out of Belle was probably way too obvious, but Regina smirked at her instead of glaring. That was a pleasant change.

"Well done, Belle." Dr. Gold's praise in her ear thrilled Belle more than it should. Maybe she _did_ have an inappropriate fangirl crush on her boss.

* * *

Later in the day, Belle found herself face to face with Regina again, though this time, without any cameras or microphones.

Belle had excused herself from the lecture room where there was a seminar being delivered by Dr. Whale. It was about the difficulty in maintaining controlled variables with subjects like gifted people. His bandaged hand didn't look as concerning as it did yesterday, but he winced whenever it grazed surfaces. When Aurora showed concern and asked how he got hurt, he dismissed the question and said that it should be of little concern since tests came back negative, but they're monitoring for any side effects.

That response wasn't what any of them were expecting, and it only made them more curious

Their questions were met with agitation and an abrupt recess.

Which was how Belle found herself nearly crashing into Regina in the bathroom.

"Well." Regina had her hand on the bathroom door and was just about to head out while Belle had been just about to head in. They were uncomfortably close to each other and it felt uneasy, the way Regina was eyeing Belle like _she_ was the test subject. "Didn't think I'd see you again so soon. Is Gold giving you instructions to keep an eye on me?"

There was the paranoia that Dr. Gold mentioned (off the record) that Regina might be suffering from.

"No, I just wanted to freshen up," Belle avoided Regina's gaze and gestured towards the stalls. "And use the toilet?"

"Hmm." Regina stepped aside, barely leaving room for Belle to squeeze through. "What's your role in all of this?"

Belle washed her hands not because they were dirty, but just because she was uncomfortable and needed something to do and didn't quite like how Regina was eyeing her. "What do you mean?"

It had been a deliberate decision to go to the farthest sink from the door, but even then, Belle still felt tense and way too close to Regina.

But why? Was Regina casting some kind of aura of uneasiness? Belle made a mental note to check on her research and notes if that was possible. Still, she did her best to push back the anxiety and try to see things from Regina's perspective. This was a woman who was a voluntary test subject but was often being spoken to and treated like little more than a lab rat. Not to mention there was the suspected abuse she could be suffering.

They were given more access to Regina's files a while ago and there were several pictures of suspicious bruises that Regina had refused to explain. Dr. Hopper just told them that they eventually decided to see if Regina could use her abilities to heal herself, and surprisingly, she was able to. From then on, there had been no recorded incidents of bruising

"Are you like his apprentice? Assistant?" Regina fidgeted with her hands as she tried to find the right word, then seemed to shrug it off. "I just… I just wonder why you're so eager to please him."

Belle felt her jaw drop. She opened and closed her mouth and tried to find the appropriate response, but just ended up fumbling and stammering. "It's… it's not like- I just… It's more like…"

"Look, I don't know what or who you did to get in here, but I just…" Regina looked around, then lowered her voice. "I just think you should be careful."

Belle's brow furrowed. "Why would you think that?"

Chewing on her lip, Regina leaned back against the bathroom door. Even if Belle was ready to leave and go back to the lecture room, there was no way she could with Regina blocking the only exit.

"I just…" Regina was trying to choose her words carefully, then she made eye contact with Belle and there was fear in there. It was different from the usual defiance and agitation and it unnerved Belle. "I think that something is wrong."

Leaving her spot at the door, Regina took a few steps toward Belle. "Look, I don't have ESP, or mind-reading or whatever it's supposed to be called. Barely, anyway."

Belle turned the faucet on and washed her hands again, just to have something to do. She suppressed a shudder when Regina positioned herself at Belle's shoulder. The whisper in her ear was just as unnerving, "But I think he's up to something. Something bad. I think he's just using me. Using us. But I can't figure out what he wants."

With a frown, Belle turned to face Regina. "He seems alright to me, though… A little too eager about his tests and experiments, but he… I think his heart is in the right place."

Regina shook her head. "I don't."

"But why?"

The conversation clearly wasn't going the way Regina had hoped and she started to back away. "Nevermind, just don't tell Gold I said anything, okay?"

"Wait, can't we just talk about where this is coming from?" This time, Belle was the one walking towards Regina as she retreated back towards the exit. "Why do you think something's wrong?"

" _We just do_." Regina's voice wasn't as fearful now, it was cold and hard. The tremor in her hand gave way though that she was still afraid. "Maybe when you meet Emma, you'll see. She… she _knows_ things."

"What- what do you mean by that?" Belle moved forward to go after Regina, but she was already briskly walking down the hallway.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to everyone who left comments and kudos. I appreciate it a lot! In today's chapter, we get a bit more Ruby, and a little bit of Mulan. Tomorrow will be when Emma finally makes her entrance.

Did they brighten the lights in her room?

She squinted and tried to bury her face in her arms. A pillow or blanket to hide under would be nice, but they gave her some excuse about how it could be a danger to her. All she had was a plain bed that was more of a thinly cushioned metal slab bolted to the wall than anything else. Sometimes she actually preferred sleeping under it than on it, to hide from the bright lights.

There was a reason for the lights being so bright in her quarters, but she couldn't recall what it was.

Grumbling, she fidgeted with the collar around her neck. The chain hooked to it was bolted to her bed. Likewise, the chains attached to her cuffs ended with her bed.

They usually gave enough slack in her chains to let her pace her room and even go under the bed. It was more so she couldn't lunge at them the moment they open the door. She understood where they were coming from. After all, she was a dangerous creature, highly unstable and prone to unpredictable aggression. That's what she heard them saying whenever they observed her and took notes.

But after the stunt she pulled with Dr. Whale, there was just barely enough slack in the chains for her to sit up. She was confined to the bed and probably deserved it.

Her stomach gurgled.

Maybe she should have just cooperated and eaten the meat.

She was so hungry.

There was a tingle in the back of her skull that told her the full moon was drawing near. Maybe in a few more days, she'd have absolutely no control of the wolf. It was probably a good idea then that she was confined like this.

At least this way, she wouldn't be able to hurt anyone anymore.

* * *

The high school hallways were abuzz with excited teenagers, eager to chow down and stretch their legs and socialize. She was no different. Her attention span could only hold so much of the babble about chemistry and other sciencey things she didn't have any interest in.

If anything, the one class she enjoyed was home economics. The cooking part anyway. It reminded her of when she was a young girl watching her Granny prepare breakfast. And lunch. And Dinner. Those weekend trips to Granny's house were always the best time ever.

Something about being in front of the oven thrilled her and brought her back to that time when she felt loved and at home.

Then something happened and she just never saw Granny again. There were reports of her being a rumored serial killer but Mother would always shut the TV off or hide the newspaper. No closure ever came and Granny just became a memory. Some kids would point at her and whisper, but that was possible to ignore.

Sometimes, she couldn't help but wonder if any of that was true. If Granny really was a serial killer.

Whenever she was angry, she would entertain the thought that _Mother_ was the actual killer. She was always hiding things and there were always those times when the house would smell weird. It was hard to pinpoint what the smell was, but it reminded her of scraped knees and elbows and raw meat.

"Yo! Daydreamer!" A voice boomed in her ear, making her jump. "Where were you this time?"

She shook her head, changing the subject, "Do you wanna meet me at the park tonight? I can tell Mother I'm studying with Dorothy."

Peter flashed that winning smile that just made her melt. "You mean meet at the park or _meet_ at the park?"

Letting out a short laugh, she gave him a playful nudge, "You know what I mean." With a bite of her lips and a sway of her hips, she gave him the wink she'd been practicing in her room last night.

"Oooh," Peter's smirk widened as he put his hand on the locker behind her and leaned over, "So we're going to _study_?"

He smelled nice. She could detect the cologne he used and the gel he put in his hair. There was also a hint of shampoo and soap, but that was dulled by the gel and cologne. It was soothing to be around him. She felt safe.

"We could _study each other_ maybe?" She waggled her eyebrows.

Peter did a little bounce. "Lookin' forward to it!"

Pain shot through her head, hitting her sharp and fast. She recoiled, putting her hands against her temples and screwing her eyes shut. Her skull was throbbing and there were lights flashing through her vision. She tried to blink them away and steady her breathing.

"Hey, hey," Peter had his hands on her face. Focusing on him helped steady her.

As suddenly as the pain hit, it subsided to a dull ache at the back of her skull.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah." She shook her head as if that would shake off the throbbing. "I'm good."

There was concern on Peter's face. "Are you getting those headahces again? That happens like every couple of weeks. Are you sure you don't wanna get that checked out? I mean I could walk you to the nurse right now."

" _NO_!" She shook her head, grabbing his hand and clutching it tightly. "I'm… I'm fine."

"Are you?"

"Mother says it's nothing to worry about." She avoided Peter's concerned eyes. "She says it's normal and that I should just tell her when I feel it so she can prepare the basement for me. There's like some calming music and stuff there and it's soundproof and I dunno." She shook her head.

Talking about it was weird. It made her think of stuff. Strange stuff. Like pain rattling through her entire body. Like wrestling with a huge dog. Which made no sense since they didn't have any dogs.

"Look, I don't wanna talk about this." She wasn't about to let her monthly headaches mess everything up. She just wasn't going to go home tonight. Mother always seemed to know when the headaches were happening. The best option would be to just avoid home and wait at the park. "I'll see you after class, okay? Like maybe _right_ after class."

Peter didn't look too convinced. There was still concern in his eyes. Like she was dying or something. Which she wasn't.

"Peter, please." She kissed his cheek. "I need this. Please?"

He sighed, "If you say so… Although I have practice after class, would you be okay to wait another hour?"

"Hey!" The stern voice of one of their teachers made them freeze. "Break it up, you two, or I'll give you detention."

Rolling his eyes, Peter turned to face the teacher and saluted, "Yes, sir."

That goofy charm was always going to make her giddy.

* * *

"204."

Jolting awake, she felt her heart skip several beats when she found a hand clamped over her mouth. Panic threatened to overwhelm her and she tried to squirm away but the assailant maintained hold of her, pushing her back down against the bed.

"Relax, relax. It's me."

As the initial panic subsided, she recognized the nice guard. Milan? Dammit, why was it so hard to remember anything anymore?

The guard tapped the name on her uniform. "Mulan Li, remember?" She was whispering and kept glancing at the door. "I'm going to remove my hand from your mouth. Can you be quiet for me, please?"

She nodded.

"Okay." Mulan slowly moved her hand away. "We don't have a lot of time, and god, if I'm found out, I'm going to be more than just fired."

Not sure how to respond to that, she just nodded again.

"Here," The guard reached into her pocket and for a moment of panic, the thought crossed the subject's mind that a weapon was going to be pulled out. That thought subsided when what instead happened was the smell of cheese and ham and bread. "Normally, I wouldn't recommend eating fast, but it won't be long before Gaston notices a glitch in the cameras."

Was this another test? She eyed the food. It appeared to be a half-eaten sandwich wrapped in tissue. How was this not a test?

"204, please." Mulan took the subject's hands and pressed the sandwich into it. "I'm sorry I couldn't bring you somethint nicer. Just… please. Don't make this risk be for nothing."

Hunger won out and she peeled back the tissue and tore into the sandwich, taking big bites and just barely reminding herself to chew. It was so good. The cheese was cold and not even spread evenly and the ham kept sliding out from under the bread but it was _so_ good. It was real food. It was just. So. Good.

"There we go." Mulan's smile looked almost pained. "I'm sorry there's not more I could do… I mean… do you have any family that knows you're here? Anyone?"

A memory flashed of when she was surrendered to the authorities. Mother watched with a set jaw and thin lips.

The subject nodded.

Mulan looked alarmed. "Really? If my brother Shang knew I was stuck here, he'd tear this place down!"

She shrugged.

A beeping sound came from somewhere in the room. "Shit," Mulan pressed a button on her watch to stop the beeping. "Yeah, I've been here too long. I set the glitch to just last a few minutes and just… shit. Okay. I gotta go."

She reached over to take what was left of the tissue. She was leaving. She was leaving and she hadn't been thanked yet. She was the nice guard. She was Mulan Li. She was the nice guard. She was leaving.

Suddenly full of fear, she reached over and grabbed Mulan's wrist. _Stay. Please._ Those were the words she wished she could have said but she hadn't spoken in so long and the words didn't come easily anymore and she knew that Mulan would be in trouble if she got caught.

"I'm sorry." Mulan looked wracked with guilt as she pulled her hand free and hurried out of the room, closing the door behind her.

This had to be a test of some sort.

From the other side of the door, Mulan was speaking to Gaston. His deep voice always had a hint of both arrogance and irritation. "Cameras wonked out just now. The prisoner-"

"The _subject_." Mulan interrupted.

"-whatever. Did she do anything weird? It's that time of the month and she's expected to go feral soon. I heard them saying she might be wilder than usual this time."

"Nothing to report, sir."

"Alright then. I'll go back and yell at Walter some more. Idiot must've pushed some button when he fell asleep on the monitors again. Fucking useless. At ease."

What if it wasn't a test and Mulan was just… _nice_?

 _Nice_ wasn't what _monsters_ deserved.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spunky, snarky, juvenile Emma finally makes her entrance today and I hope it doesn't disappoint.

A few more days of tests, research and lectures came and went without too much incident. Regina acted like their conversation never happened so even if the issue was at the back of her mind, Belle tried to focus instead on excelling at the tasks assigned to her over the course of the program. She compiled extensive notes on whatever she observed, she proofread and confirmed existing notes, appended outdated ones, even had the chance to discuss some of her theories with both her fellow interns and with Dr. Gold himself.

It was as they were studying the files of Regina Mills and her mother, Cora Mills, for overlapping variables, when Dr. Gold strode into the room.

"I've got a treat for you, dearies." Dr. Gold rubbed his palms together. "You're ready to meet Subject 223."

"Was that the juvenile one?" Tamara asked, rifling through her notebook. "Dove, I think was her name? No, here it is. Swan. Emma Swan."

Dr. Gold grinned and Belle wasn't sure what to feel about the twinge of jealousy that trickled through her. "Right you are, Tamara!"

The screen behind Dr. Gold flashed a picture that looked more like a mugshot than anything else. The subject was even holding the card with her data and number. She had a half-healed black-eye, thick blond hair and a look in her olive eyes that gave one the feeling that she was always ready for a fight at the smallest provocation.

She looked like she might be a bit younger- mid to late teens, maybe- but the bags under her eyes made it hard to be sure.

"She refused to have her picture taken so we just extracted this image from her police records." Dr. Gold explained, pushing a button so the next slide showed Emma's basic file.

* * *

**_NAME_ : Emma Swan**

_AGE_ : 19

 _HAIR_ : Blond

 _EYES_ : Green

 _DISTINGUISHING FEATURES_ : flower tattoo inside left wrist

 _ABILITIES_ : Aura Reading; Clairvoyance; Remote-viewing; generally a range of ESP abilities; rapidly developing telepathy; underdeveloped postcognition; untested instances of mild precognition; may have potential for Telekinesis but no properly recorded instances yet.

 _OTHER NOTES:_ Suspected of having undiagnosed mental illness; highly unstable, defensive, easily agitated; criminal history; grew up in foster care- mother died at childbirth, father a cop killed on duty early in her childhood

* * *

After being given a moment to read through the basic overview, Dr. Gold went back to the slide showing Emma's face. "We actually found her in police custody and had to make some very particular arrangements. She's been in and out of Juvenile Hall. The initial arrangement, made just before she turned seventeen, was for her to report here regularly and stay out of trouble."

"I'm sensing there's a _but_ coming up." Tamara said while toying with her pen.

Dr. Gold nodded. "Of course, this difficult young woman was caught conning people again, and there's a high probability she was using her abilities to effectively locate storage units, decipher codes to safes…" He shrugged, "…and similar shenanigans."

"So did you have to strike up a new deal with the cops?" Tamara spoke again.

"Indeed we did, dearie." Dr. Gold said, "The new arrangement is for her to be detained here instead of in prison. She took the deal, but she doesn't seem too happy about it."

It was difficult to imagine how tough the young woman's life must be, what she might have gone through growing up, what pushed her to get into trouble with the law so often. Belle felt a mixture of pity and intrigue.

She couldn't help noticing though how _here_ , they had another possible connection between emotional instability and supernatural ability. Did Dr. Gold have other subjects with similar traits?

* * *

Was there ever a time when she wasn't a monster?

It was hard to recall if she was ever not a monster.

Well, to be fair, it was hard to recall much of anything anymore. She'd been here for so long and it was impossible to keep track of the days or base them on anything. Her quarters were always well-lit and her feeding times were irregular.

Or it felt like they were irregular anyway.

Especially recently, since she'd been put on decreased rations. That's what Dr. Whale had said. Something about less food to see how her hunger would affect the wolf. Assuming she understood that correctly.

Sometimes, it felt like she hardly understood much of anything anymore.

"You seem deep in thought today." This was a nice scientist. His name was… _something_. She glanced at his labcoat and had to decipher the letters. She rarely read anything anymore, it didn't come as naturally as it used to.

H…

H.O.

H.O.P.

Hopper. This one was Dr. Hopper.

"What's on your mind?" He pulled out a flashlight and shone it in her eyes, testing whatever it was he was supposed to be testing.

She shrugged, not sure how to put it into words, too tired to bother trying.

"Your eyes are turning into a warmer color than usual, which is what we've noticed whenever the full moon is approaching." Dr. Hopper said. "Do you feel it? The approaching full moon?"

She nodded.

"Okay, I'm going to just use the stethoscope over here," Dr. Hopper reached over, "It's cold and metallic but it's not silver. You know that, right?"

She did, but it was hard not to flinch at the contact of the cold metal against her skin. After so long, she'd grown to associate metal with the burn of silver, given how the collar and cuffs never came off anymore.

"Thank you," Dr. Hopper said, "Now I'm going to need you to breathe in, then cough three times. Can you do that for me?"

After nodding, she did as she was told.

It almost reminded her of when she would play doctor with Mother. They would be in the basement and she would talk about how the headaches would go away soon, she just needed to stay in the basement and behave.

She furrowed her brow.

There was another memory, just barely within reach.

It was when Granny was still around. She would… she would fight with Mother a lot, didn't she? There were arguments. There was yelling.

But what was it about?

"Alright, that's all for the routine checkup for now." Dr. Hopper said, "I'd give you a treat like candy, like before, but you're under a strict diet prescribed by Dr. Gold and Dr. Whale." He looked apologetic. "I'm sorry."

She shrugged.

"Thank you, though. For cooperating. I really appreciate it." He reached over again with one of his hands. She tensed up, tried not to recoil as he put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed. It was supposed to be reassuring, but she just didn't feel any better. "I'll see you again later for the other tests, okay? The fitness ones. It'll be key since the full moon is coming and we want to record everything."

She just nodded and watched as he gave her another look that was almost apologetic, then left.

The chains were still short, keeping her from leaving her bed. Mulan came by a few times to let the subject relieve herself.

It would still be nice to be able to pace again.

Lying down all day, staring at the bright light… it was making her remember things.

And she didn't want to remember anymore.

* * *

They weren't allowed to speak directly to Emma during the session just yet. Dr. Gold said that it was for their own safety since Subject 223 was a crafty individual and they needed to observe her first and be aware of her abilities before they could interact with her.

The test they were running today was telepathy. Emma was in one room and Regina was in another room. They were in mirrored positions, separated by a thick wall in sound proof rooms. The readings showed that they were relatively calm.

"Emma, dearie," Dr. Gold spoke into the microphone hooked up to the speakers in Emma's room. "Can you try to see into the room behind you?"

"I don't even have to bother using my powers to know you've paired me up with Regina again." Emma's snarky tone came through the speakers as she looked directly at them. Belle had to remind herself that from Emma's view, that was a mirror and not a glass window full of people watching her.

"But you know what, I'll humor you, sure." Emma leaned back against her seat, folded her arms across her chest. "Okay. Her haircut is the same, but it's growing out a bit. She's in her usual clothes. Business-like, as if she's attending some conference for student leaders. Black blazer, black skirt. The shirt inside is… white? No, off-white. Cream. Whatever."

"Now I want you to pick a word and tell us that word verbally." Dr. Gold said, "And repeat it to Regina telepathically."

Emma stretched out her limbs and yawned before leaning back down, draping her arms over the back of the chair. She looked up at the ceiling. "Hmm… How about…" Again, the way she glanced straight at the mirror was unnerving.

What was more unnerving was that she didn't say her word out loud, but Belle heard it.

_Werewolf._

Belle looked around at the other interns and scientists. Did any of them hear that as well? None of them were reacting. Tamara was scribbling notes and Aurora was analyzing the readings. Dr. Whale was rubbing at his bandaged hand and looking distracted.

"Dearie, what's your chosen word?" Dr. Gold prompted.

Emma smirked, this time looking at the camera. "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious."

Dr. Gold's mouth was a thin line. "Really?"

The question was answered with a nonchalant shrug.

Sighing, Dr. Gold then pushed the button for the microphone to Regina's speakers. "Regina, dearie, did you get any message from Emma?"

"Werewolf." Regina answered.

Dr. Gold seemed intrigued by this. "Regina, are you sure?"

"Yes, she practically spelled it out and showed me pictures of Remus Lupin."

Everyone was furiously taking notes and analyzing the readings. Even Dr. Whale didn't look so bored anymore, transferring data and printing some of the readings for later analysis. Dr. Gold was scratching at his chin and seemed to be trying to choose his next words carefully.

"Regina, dearie, did she tell you anything else?"

Regina looked confused. "She… she's saying she's bored? And wants a new set of DVD's? She'd rather not cooperate until she's given more interesting media to entertain herself with. She'd also like at least a pack of cigarettes a week."

From her room, Emma was looking at them again. She winked.

_Can you hear me?_

Belle stiffened.

_Yeah, I think you can._

She looked around. Nobody seemed to be acting like they were getting telepathic messages. Were they just really good at hiding it, or…?

_Nah. It's just you I'm talking to right now. There's something I'm working on but I'm still trying to work out how to move my energy around for it, but let's just say I'm trying to develop a mental conference call, how's that sound?_

"Excuse me," Belle walked past the other interns and out of the control room. She needed to get some air and get Emma's voice out of her head. This was fascinating, yes, but probably a little too soon for Belle. She was used to observing and being on the sidelines. As exciting as it is to be in the middle of things like this, Belle could see now why Dr. Gold had warned them about not being ready to interact directly with Emma.

 _Eww, Regina was right, you_ legit _have a crush on the little goblin._

Belle froze. How could Emma still reach her?

_Not gonna lie, it's getting harder to maintain contact and you just made it nearly impossible for me to setup the three-way line. Why'd you do that, Teacher's Pet?_

Belle looked around, feeling as if the passing scientists, assistants and security were on to her. This was surreal. Shouldn't she be telling Dr. Gold that Emma could reach farther than what their notes said she could?

_Okay, look. Regina seems to like you, and I'll take her word for it that there might be more to you than there is to the other docs over here. I'll make this quick because I'm feeling a nosebleed coming on and I'd rather not let Gold know what I'm up to._

Pain was radiating through Belle's head and she herself felt a nosebleed coming on, but when she wiped at her nose, there was nothing. Could she just be feeling what Emma was feeling? On top of the headache, Belle found herself experiencing fear and anxiety and anger and pain and hatred. The emotions were powerful and boiling.

_This is a fucking huge risk though and I don't quite trust you just yet. Letting you link up to my head feels invasive as fuck._

_Emma_ was the one who felt intruded upon?

 _Just shut up and listen._ God _. I'm trying to be just about prepared for the consequence of him finding out I'm playing around, just in case you rat us out. I just figured I'd make the most out of it while I still can._

"I'll think about whether or not I'll tell him." Belle whispered the thought, then mentally kicked herself. Was she really thinking about making a deal with this juvenile teenager playing games with prestigious scientists? They were researching breakthroughs in abilities that were even further beyond the scope of what was previously dismissed as impossible. This wasn't something to play games with!

_Now you're just being rude._

Sorry. Emma was right. Judging someone like that wasn't something that Belle usually did. Or rather, she tried not to anyway.

 _Right. Let's stop getting sidetracked. The thing is, you seem like you might be interesting, and Gold seems pretty fond of you. Okay,_ ew _, I don't like being able to feel your excitement about that._

Belle felt chastised and indignant at the same time.

_There's another subject we've been overhearing about, and I may have gotten some glimpses of her. I'm curious and want more details and I think you might be curious too. You seem like that nerdy type who'd want to know more than what's good for you._

_Shit, okay, nosebleed coming in. Shit. Gold's going to notice. I'll just say Regina and I were talking about sex. That'll shut him up._

_Fuck. Head hurts._

The headache reached new heights and Belle had to lean against the wall to steady herself.

_Okay._

_Okay._

_204._

_Subject 204. Do what you can to find out about her. I have a feeling they're not treating her too well and I have a feeling Regina and I are close to being next._

_Remember. Subject 204._

_Telling you this better not be a mistake or Regina and I might soon find ourselves in deep shit._

What was in it for Belle? She wasn't here to play games, she was here to get hired and she'd done way too much research and worked too hard to get this close and she didn't feel too keen on letting some girl get in the way of that.

A vague image flashed through Belle's mind. It was hazy and hard to make out. Like looking through a foggy window. She could just barely make out limp brown hair and sad green eyes.

No. Emma was messing with her mind. Belle wasn't going to let anything ruin this opportunity. There was no way she was going to turn her back on everything she'd done to get here. The sleepless nights researching, the weeks spent finding people to interview, the months spent collecting and refining data… The stress and tears of putting it all together and defending it. None of that was worth snooping around the facility of the very person who gave you the opportunity of a lifetime.

Right?

Belle looked around. There were no more voices in her head and the headache had vanished completely.

Still, she couldn't deny that there was a part of her that _did_ want to know who 204 was and why she was here.

Wasn't she the one that caused Dr. Whale's hand injury?

Was the young woman Emma showed _actually_ 204?

With a groan, Belle ran her hands through her hair and headed for her original destination- the bathroom. She needed time to just freshen up and think this over.

She was _actually_ going to consider playing Emma's games.

Belle splashed water against her face and gave herself a long hard look in the mirror.

There were angles and sides to every situation, and this one was no different. She had to try and look at this with a clear head and right now, her head was anything but. Still, she had to try. She didn't owe Regina or Emma anything, but they reached out to her for a reason.

What could that reason be?

Emma said it was Regina that thought Belle was someone they could approach.

Belle went through her interactions with Regina. They didn't have a lot. Regina was assigned to each of the interns at least once, although Dr. Gold did give Belle several more sessions with Regina than the others. He mentioned that Belle seemed good at calming Regina down and empathizing with her.

Maybe that was the reason. Regina felt like she could trust Belle and convinced Emma it was worth taking a risk.

Risk. That was what Emma said.

Almost as if there was some heavy consequence that could come from what they were doing. As if they had punishment they were in danger of facing if the stunt they pulled was to be found out.

Would Dr. Gold really do that?

Belle knew she couldn't pretend to know what daily life at the facility was like when what the interns were exposed to was very controlled. There were still many closed doors and classified files. But could it really be as bad as Regina and Emma were fearing?

What were they afraid of?

If Emma was being detained here, Belle figured bad consequences could be simple things like denial of television privileges, right? Some gut feeling in Belle told her there was more to it than that though.

Splashing more water against her face, Belle brushed off the thoughts. She'd been gone way too long now and the last thing she needed was for Dr. Gold to get suspicious or for Tamara to call her out for slacking off. And yet, she couldn't brush off the genuine fear that Emma had been feeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter, I think is a push forward because things gradually start picking up and getting heavier from here on out. Lemme know what you're looking forward to and what you feel about what's happening so far. These things make me feel good and make me write more, awyea.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is shorter than the last one, and more of a continuation from the last chapter and some buildup to the next one.

The sun had yet to set, but already, she was getting her headaches. They always seemed to worsen at night, until going to the basement soothed them and she just found herself falling asleep.

Right about now, it was almost tempting to go home and do that. The constant vibrations of her phone in her pocket also added to her second thoughts.

Releasing her frustration in a long, low groan, she fished her phone out and declined Mother's seventeenth call. The calls weren't going to end, and she would probably be grounded for the rest of her life if she didn't call this off and just go home.

But it was getting too much at home. Mother was getting increasingly difficult to talk to and instead of loosening her grip like most moms and slowly letting their daughter have just a little bit more freedom every year, the case was the other way around.

Mother kept saying odd things, bringing up how their family was different than everyone else and they had to maintain their distance and she should start thinking about breaking up with Peter for his own safety.

Bad things always happened to this family and they were better off keeping their distance. In fact, maybe they should just go back home to Canada. It was a mistake for Granny to come here and they should go back and stay along the outskirts or the countryside, away from the crowd of the city. Mother had some friends from her childhood there and they had a son named Quinn who would be a more appropriate match.

Grumbling to herself, she shut her phone off and put it inside her bag instead.

Out of sight, out of mind.

She hadn't told Peter yet that Mother was thinking of moving them out of the country. Was it necessary though? What if they ran away together instead? It could work… She had some money saved up from her shifts at the diner, and she'd been browsing cheap places to stay. It could work. If Peter pitched in as well, they could make things work.

Resolving to tell Peter about her plans, she put her hands in her pockets and paced the park, mentally rehearsing how she would broach the subject once he arrived after basketball practice.

The headaches were receding into dull throbs again.

She could do this. It was all going to work out, and it was all going to be okay.

It had to.

* * *

The headaches were coming on more quickly. They were the only way to tell time anymore, but she'd lost track of how many wolftimes had come and gone. At this point, she had resigned herself to her fate.

What freedom did she deserve, anyway? After what she did to Peter, how could she have the gall to wish she could be out of here?

Even if they did finally succeed in curing her, did she really deserve to be free?

What she really deserved was being locked up and treated like the monster that she actually was.

The door to her quarters slid open and she sat up to ready herself for whatever would come next. Today, it was Dr. Gold striding in, with his lifted chin and wide smile. "Greetings, dearie," It was difficult to tell if he purposely didn't say if it was morning, afternoon or night. "Has your bed rest helped calm you down a tad?"

The chains rattled as she folded her hands across her lap and shrugged, avoiding eye contact.

"Are you getting the headaches again?"

She nodded.

"Yes, looks like Dr. Hopper noted that as well." Dr. Gold took a moment to study the file, careful to be just out of reach, a good meter or so away from the bed. "We'll be running some other tests now. Mostly strength and endurance tests since there is always a surge that comes before the final transformation."

"Gaston," Dr. Gold snapped his fingers, "Transport her to Examination Room 2A."

* * *

It was Dr. Whale facilitating their research this time. A stupid part of Belle was just a little bit disappointed that Dr. Gold wasn't available for the morning. This ridiculous schoolgirl crush had to go away soon and ever since Emma pointed it out, Belle could almost imagine her snarky, judgmental comments whenever the giddiness came and went.

Just focus on what's going on now, Belle told herself.

They were running more tests with Emma and Regina, this time with one of the interns assigned to be in the room with Regina. After a minor incident where Tamara failed to deescalate a tantrum from Regina, they were monitored more closely. A guard was stationed at the corner, ready for action in case Regina lashed out at Aurora.

Glancing at the guard's belt, Belle hoped the weapon at her holster was just something for stunning or shocking, but from the look of it, it was most likely a gun. That and the prod hanging from the guard's other hip made Belle uneasy.

She tried to tell herself it was just standard procedure. The guards were here for the safety of everyone involved and probably were trained to protect both the subjects and the scientists.

_You are annoyingly optimistic, has anyone ever told you that?_

Belle suppressed a groan and rubbed at the bridge of her nose.

"The fuck is your problem?" Tamara sneered.

Belle shook her head and returned her attention to the screens. "I'm fine, just a migraine or something."

"Aurora, the idea here is for you to say something to Regina, anything really," Dr. Whale sounded bored. His hand wasn't bandaged anymore, and the cut in his palm was healing, but he still rubbed at it and stared at it a lot. Even now, he was fidgeting with his hands and glaring at the cut. "Something that neither she nor Emma would know. We're trying to see if adding another variable will affect the range of Emma's abilities since she's already very accustomed to reading Regina."

"Regina says the girl's kind of hot. In a cardigan and dress kind of way." Emma's voice came through the speakers in the control room.

Interestingly enough, Regina banged a fist on the table and spoke out loud. "Dammit, I told Emma not to say anything and she said she just did. What did she say?"

"What do you mean?" Aurora looked at Regina, then glanced at the guard, who just shrugged. Belle had to remind herself that due to the soundproofing and the carefully controlled speakers and microphones, Aurora couldn't hear anything coming out of Emma's mouth.

"Am I wrong?" Emma's voice was as goading as ever as it hit them from the control room speakers. "I mean, I can see her right now, through Madame Student Council President's eyes." She shrugged, "I wouldn't say Cardigan Girl's my type, but eh. Whatever float's Reggie's boat."

"Dammit, 223." Dr. Whale was tensing up as he pushed the button to Emma's mic. "Just behave for once in your life, why don't you?" With an exaggerated sigh, he pushed the button for Aurora and Regina's mic. "Aurora, just say something to Regina, like a passage from your favorite book or a quote from a song, I don't fucking care, really, just get this test moving along."

Aurora looked chastised and fidgeted in her seat. Belle noticed that both Regina and the guard were looking at her sympathetically.

"Right… uh…" After casting another set of glances at the guard, Regina and the mirror, Aurora finally spoke, "I know you once upon a dream. That look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam. I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem but if I know you, I'll know what you'll do. You'll love me at once the way you did once upon a dream."

Regina raised an eyebrow. "What?"

Aurora shrugged. "It's from this poem my dad used to read to me so I could sleep better since I had pretty bad insomnia as a kid."

"Ohh… Okay." Regina clasped her hands and leaned forward. "Could you repeat that? I think Emma didn't catch the whole thing,"

With more confidence than last time, Aurora recited the words again, then glanced at the camera for further instructions.

"Well… that was interesting." Dr. Whale fidgeted with his hands again before pressing the button for Emma's speakers. "Did you catch that? Can you repeat it?"

Emma folded her arms across her chest and indignantly looked at them, again like she could see them through the mirror. "What like word for word?"

"Preferably, yes."

The groan Emma let out was long, loud, unfiltered and exaggerated. "Fiiine. Okay. I think it went… I know you? Something something gleam? Once upon a dream? Seldom seems… dreams… love. Something." She threw her hands up in frustration. "Fuck if I know! I do telepathic shit, not photographic memory shit!"

"Maybe," Belle wasn't sure if it was her place to speak, but she thought it was as good a time as any to make a suggestion. "We could have Aurora repeat the poem line by line? Or can Emma just paraphrase? I mean, it's clear enough that she heard the poem, she just can't remember it. On top of that, she just admitted a moment ago that she can see through Regina's eyes, and not just have a capability to sense outside of herself. Has that been recorded before?"

Dr. Whale didn't speak right away, but he did turn to face her with a raised eyebrow.

Well he wasn't asking her to stop talking. Tamara was glaring again though.

"I feel like that's an interesting development since until now, the notes say that she's capable of having mental conversations with Regina, and sensing details surrounding Regina, but she hasn't previously revealed that she can see through Regina's eyes." Belle hesitated, then waved her hands to dismiss what she'd just said in case she'd actually spoken out of turn and already upset the irritable scientist. "I mean, that's based only on the files you've allowed us to look at, of course. Sorry."

"Actually," Dr. Whale pointed at Belle, "Good point."

 _Fuck you, Teacher's Pet_.

Blasted by a wave of Emma's anger, Belle felt guilt settle at the pit of her stomach. This was starting to feel like an _us_ or _them_ situation and as far as Emma was concerned, Belle was with _them_.

But it was more complicated than that. Belle did feel worry for Regina and Emma and whatever they may be afraid of, but what could be done? There was still so much to the facility that Belle had yet to be granted access to. The keycards they were given only allowed them to enter certain rooms.

If Subject 204, whoever or whatever she was, had multiple levels of security to go through, what chance did Belle have of finding her? What did Emma and Regina think Belle could do?

_Gold likes you._

What.

Emma was staring, and Belle felt scrutinized and exposed. It should be impossible for anyone inside the examination room to see anyone in the control room, but knowing how well Emma was at hiding the real scope of her abilities, anything was possible.

_Maybe you two are just a match made in heaven and you'll be next to poke and prod at us. We're just labrats to you anyway, aren't we?_

Maintaining eye contact, Emma continued to unnerve Belle as guards came into the room to escort the subject back to her quarters for a short break so the team could go over their findings.

_Quarters? It's a fucking prison cell. At this point, I'm not sure if I would have preferred jail or this._

An image flashed through Belle's mind, of a bare room with a metal bench covered by little more than a thin mattress, a lumpy pillow and stiff sheets. There was no TV, as Belle had imagined. Just… a room with the bare necessities. A toilet in the corner, but not even a mirror or a sink or books or... or anything.

_Sometimes they let me read books. You know how I watch TV? Regina sends me scenes. And I have a bad feeling that one day, they won't be allowing her to go home after a test._

Belle frowned and had to physically stop herself from questioning out loud why Emma would think that.

_I just know._

"Belle?"

Blinking, Belle felt the connection to Emma waver, and then vanish. She looked up to see that Dr. Whale was already packing up his notes and the other interns had already left for a break. It was just Aurora who stayed and she was tapping on Belle's shoulder.

"Sorry." Belle wasn't sure what to think anymore. It was possible that Emma was being manipulative and nothing was wrong. Maybe she and Regina were simply paranoid. But Belle felt like she had to give them the benefit of a doubt. There had been some instances where the scientists seemed just a little too clinical with the subjects, and Belle hadn't liked that.

There could be at least just a bit of merit to Emma and Regina's concerns.

Realizing that Aurora was still staring at her, Belle said, "Gosh, sorry again. I just have a lot on my mind. Did you say something?"

"Did you want to have lunch together again?" Aurora asked.

Lunch sounded good right about now. "Yeah, sure!"

"Shit!" Dr. Whale, probably distractedly fidgeting with his hand again, knocked over a box next to the monitors. Files spilled out across the floor and Belle immediately noticed that there were files pertaining to subjects other than Regina and Emma. There were some of what looked like Cora Mills's files, and then Belle glimpsed a picture of an older woman, in her sixties or seventies. Pictures included in the file were shots of the older woman's arm, with deep scars cutting through the skin.

"Do you need help, sir?" Mentally kicking herself for taking advantage of this, Belle kneeled down and started helping Dr. Whale gather up the files. As she was putting some together, she spotted the numbers.

_204._

Unable to help herself, Belle paused and looked at the sheet. At the top corner was a picture of a teenager who looked terrified. Haunted. Her green eyes sunk deep into dark circles. The picture was faded, possibly a few years old. It was the same person as the one in the hazy image that Emma showed. It had to be.

Dr. Whale snatched the file from Belle and stuffed it back into the box. "You're not cleared to see that."

"But-"

"Get out or I'll have Gold take you off of the program!" Dr. Whale snapped, and Belle knew better than to call his bluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Belle is still on the fence about joining forces with team Swan Queen, but she'll get there soon enough. Just a little bit more pushing and pulling is needed, really.
> 
> On another note, I've started churning out longer chapters lately, which means I'm not finishing as many chapters a day as I was when this first launched. Which means I'm starting to post more chapters than I'm finishing, so we may be reaching an end to my buffer this weekend, depending on how I fare with regaining steam.
> 
> So my question is this: How are you finding the daily schedule? Will you be willing to downgrade to an every-other-day or possibly bi-weekly schedule? Chapters will most likely be longer, if that helps you feel any better about the possible schedule change


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who gave their input on a possible change to our update schedule! I should be able to maintain the daily sched until around Monday or Tuesday. Then we'll see from there how well I can keep up.
> 
> Also, just gonna give you guys a bit of a warning. This chapter will be kinda heavy.
> 
> One more thing, if you're liking how this is unfolding, you should think about checking out Konako's story, [The Storybrooke Habitats](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10694376/chapters/23685669), it has some pretty similar themes because Konako and I apparently share brains sometimes.

When she'd been escorted into the examination room, she had expected treadmills and weights, like what she was usually put through before the full moon. Instead, there as a large tank, practically an elevated swimming pool, with platforms and monitors around it.

It was different and she couldn't help but stop to take in her new surroundings.

"Move!" One of the guards holding the other end of the pole hooked to her collar jerked her forward and she stumbled, just barely managing to regain her balance. They had cuffed her hands behind her back again and she would not have been able to catch herself if she'd been fallen over.

The jerking movement meant the silver lining the inside of her collar was pushed against her throat and the pain made her angry. A growl was already starting to rumble in her chest as she turned to glare at the guard. This was the one she didn't like.

Gaston.

He met her eyes without backing down. One hand was gripping the pole tightly, but the other was holding the prod. It sparked to life and the sight of it made her heart beat fast. "What's the matter, Wolfie? Did I upset the skinny little pup?"

Heat building up behind her eyes, jaw clenching, teeth pushing against her lips, she growled. It was frighteningly easy to imagine swiping at him with her claws and biting into him and shaking his limp body around. She _wanted_ to.

She felt another yank, this time from her left. The guard holding second pole hooked to her collar was also brandishing his prod.

They were ready to subdue her if she went feral.

And she was so close.

So.

Close.

Forcing her shoulders to relax and her jaw to loosen up, she put great effort into fighting back the wolf that was trying to take over. The guards took advantage of her pause and jostled her forward until she was right in front of a cage set next to the pool.

The cage was just barely higher and wider than herself, maybe a tight fit for a bigger man like Gaston, but still enough for him to stand stiffly inside. And the thought of that was fun to imagine.

"Ready to go for a swim, dearie?" Dr. Gold strolled over, clipboard in hand, Dr. Hopper following close behind. "There wasn't time to go shopping for a nice swimsuit for you though."

She just stared, not sure how to comprehend the situation. Not sure if they were joking. Not sure if this was some test to see how she would react. Not sure about anything. Not able to understand anything.

Dr. Gold raised his eyebrow. "Something the matter, dearie?"

Everything was the matter. This was different. This was difficult to process. Did they want her to just… freestyle or butterfly or whatever the swimming forms were? What was going on? What did they want her to do?

She opened her mouth and tried to get the words out, but they just got caught in her throat and wouldn't come out. They got jumbled up somewhere between her brain and her mouth and it was difficult to choose how best to formulate her thoughts.

Did he really mean that question? Was he expecting an answer?

Licking her lips, she shifted her weight from one bare foot to the other, still at a loss for words. She wanted to ask questions. She wanted to understand.

This was all still so she could be cured, right?

Dr. Gold wasn't even paying attention anymore. He was going through his notes and writing things down.

What was the use? He didn't really need an answer from her anyway. She closed her mouth and just looked down at the floor.

"Keep the cuffs as is or let her have her hands for this?" Dr. Gold's question was directed to Dr. Hopper, who looked vaguely uncomfortable and kept glancing at her like he pitied her. Like she deserved any pity after what she'd done to Peter. After what she'd done to several schoolmates and a teacher.

This monster didn't deserve any pity.

"I… I'd rather we unclasp them?" Dr. Hopper seemed to shrunk next to Dr. Gold, even if the latter was much shorter. "That would make it easier to see how she fares against any tests involving running water…?"

"I say keep the cuffs on." Dr. Gold didn't even look like he considered Dr. Hopper's suggestion. "We don't know how the bars will fare against her strength. If she breaks them, our results won't reflect what I'm looking for."

"But…" Dr. Hopper quieted at the superior scientist's glare. "…okay."

Dr. Gold turned to the guards, "Keep her still."

The guards nodded and tightened their grips on the poles. At Dr. Gold's instruction, Dr. Hopper started putting the sensors all over the subject. They were a different type this time, maybe some waterproof version of the ones they usually hooked up to her when she was doing the other tests. He struggled with the ones meant to go on her head. There was a time when her hair had been smooth and silky. Now it was tangled and rough and getting caught in the wires.

"I don't know why we don't just shave that off already." Dr. Gold seemed to notice the mild struggle.

She couldn't help the growl that reverberated through her throat.

Dr. Hopper heard it and jumped back in alarm. The guards were quick to act, using the poles to pull her down to the floor, and two more guards came to pin her down.

What was the issue? It was just hair, wasn't it? Why was she being so defensive about it?

Stupid little memories ran through her mind of Granny braiding the strands, many years ago. A lifetime ago.

"Igor, get me a razor. Something like the one we used on 115." Dr. Gold shot orders at one of the assistants before striding over to the subject and crouching next to her prone form.

There were knees planted across her back and boots keeping the poles, and by extension, the collar touching the floor. She tried to squirm and kick her way free, until at least one guard started pinning her legs down.

Electricity jolted through her, catching her off guard and causing her to scream and thrash underneath the guards pinning her down. When it passed, she was breathing heavily and feeling dazed. The anger and hot energy was building up inside her and trying to come out.

She had to fight against it.

It couldn't be wolfstime yet. Her headaches were still sporadic, but not continuous. It was very soon, but it wasn't upon her yet.

Right?

She was still breathing heavily when the feeling finally passed.

"That mane of yours isn't anything to be proud of anymore anyway." Dr. Gold's tone was low and irritated as he took a fistful of her hair, pulling until her scalp hurt and her neck strained to follow the direction he was pulling. "Tests will run by so much more smoothly with this out of the way."

He pulled out the few wires and sensors that Dr. Hopper had managed to tangle into the mess.

"Now just stay still."

The buzz of a razor hummed through her ears. She screwed her eyes shut as the sound got closer and closer.

* * *

It was hard to eat with her mind abuzz like this. Belle found herself just toying with her fork as she sat across Aurora in the pantry. There were other scientists and assistants here, but it wasn't anywhere near as crowded or noisy as the cafeteria at school.

"Are you alright?" Aurora asked. "You seem distracted today. And you're usually so focused."

Was it that obvious? Belle wasn't sure yet if she should tell someone about Emma's ability to communicate telepathically at a more elaborate range and frequency than what she was letting on. On one hand, there was some obligation to report it to Dr. Gold since he needed this kind of data to be able to keep his studies as accurate as possible. On the other hand, there was the ethical concern of any consequence that may befall Emma and Regina if it was discovered that they were capable of more than what they were letting on.

At first, she was leaning towards the former, but now, after seeing solid evidence of a Subject 204, Belle wasn't sure what to think.

There was a desperation to Emma and Regina that made it hard for Belle to continue assuming that they were just playing games. That, and during the moments that Emma would send thoughts towards Belle, there were often emotions tied to those thoughts. Emotions like Emma's genuine worry and fear.

Belle sighed and rubbed at the bridge of her nose. "I don't know. I feel like I have a lot on my mind."

"Was it because of the other subject files that were in Dr. Whale's box?" Aurora prompted. "When I arrived early this morning, he was going through the files and kind of put things away abruptly. I just figured he was studying some data that we weren't yet authorized to see."

"That's probably it." Belle halfheartedly got herself to eat bit of her lasagna.

"But…" Aurora was chewing on her bottom lip. She glanced left and right before leaning forward, voice lowered to a whisper. "Emma spoke to me."

Belle froze in the middle of forking food into her mouth. She put the utensil away and leaned forward as well. "You too?"

Aurora nodded.

"What did she say?"

"Not a lot…" Aurora squirmed a little, glancing again behind her. "Just that she'd like to get to know me better and she wanted to know what I hope to gain from this internship. And she might need my help with something."

Belle felt her eyebrows rise. That wasn't what she was expecting. Perhaps Emma and Regina were being more careful this time around, getting a better feel of people before laying out any cards.

"The thing is, Dr. Gold _did_ warn us about Emma being an exceptional con artist." Aurora shrugged. "So I'm not sure what to think. She seemed nice enough. Well as nice as anyone infiltrating your head with messages can be."

Aurora frowned. "Wait, so did she talk to you, too?"

"Sort of…" Belle hesitated, not quite sure if it was a good idea to share what she knew with Aurora. "She showed me what her quarters looked like."

She paused.

Took a deep breath.

"And she showed me the image of someone. Someone whose file I saw among Dr. Whale's papers."

Aurora glanced around again, then made eye contact with Belle. "Maybe we could talk about this tonight? We might be late."

* * *

Air.

She needed air.

Her lungs were on fire, her head was on fire. Everything was on fire inside of her. There was the burning behind her eyes, the sharpening of her teeth, the lengthening of er claws. The wolf was trying to save her.

Darkness was creeping along the edges of her vision as she struggled to surface but her wrists were chained to the bars of the cage and the cage was submerged deep in the tank and she was drowning.

Maybe she deserved it. Maybe this was the fate that she should have had all along. She didn't need redemption or a cure. She needed an end. That way, she wouldn't be able to hurt anyone anymore.

Just as she was releasing what little air was left in her lungs, she felt the cage starting to rise. When it finally broke the surface just enough for her head to be above water, she coughed and spluttered and sucked in as much air as she could.

The hospital gown she'd been wearing for… _a while_ , was sticking to her skin and it felt cold and itchy and though she was rarely affected by temperatures, she actually found herself shivering.

They brought the cage up higher until it was completely out of the water and she could slump against the bars.

"Our readings say you came close to shifting that time." Dr. Gold said. "We're getting close to finding the threshold between the two forms."

She was lightheaded and drained, but unless she was mistaken, it sounded more like they were trying to get her to shift than get her to _stop_ the shift. Unless she was delirious from coming close to drowning several times, it was starting to look like all their recent tests were more to trigger the wolf to come out than to improve her control of the wolf.

As the thought crossed her mind, anger started burning through her again and she tugged at the chains, trying to get closer, trying to get lose, trying to attack.

"Calm yourself, dearie." Dr. Gold's hand hovered over the button that would bring the cage back into the water. "I'd rather not have to replace this equipment."

What was she doing? These were scientists trying to cure her of her monstrosity. They had nothing to gain by turning her into a monster, right? A monster would just be a danger to them.

She slumped back against the bars.

Already, she _was_ a danger.

"Good girl." Dr. Gold was again speaking to her like she was a small child or a difficult pet. "Now I think we'll wrap up for now. We can continue this test another day. Maybe on the fullmoon or after. Still, it's interesting to see that you're capable of holding your breath far longer than any human, probably longer even than records set by Olympic swimmers."

She looked at him, hoping he'd explain to her the reasons behind the more difficult tests they'd been running recently. He probably wasn't going to do that because she asked. Most of the time, he just told her bits and pieces. Whatever he felt like explaining to her.

At the very least, she wished he would at least reassure her that this was all still for the purpose of curing her.

A whine made its way past her lips.

"Sorry?" Dr. Gold raised his eyebrow and looked up from his clipboard. "What's the matter, dearie?"

The words couldn't come. She could only look at him and hoped he would understand.

His hand went to the controls and her heart pounded against her chest faster than ever as she anticipated another plunge into the water. Instead, the cage moved closer towards Dr. Gold until it reached the end of the pool and stopped right in front of him.

"I understand you're under a lot of stress right now." Dr. Gold reached over and she flinched involuntarily as his hand came closer and closer to his face. She shut her eyes tightly, but instead of any rough treatment, he ran his palms through her shorn hair. There wasn't much left, but it was unevenly cut since it was a rushed job. She felt like there were still tufts sticking out longer than the others.

The feel of his palm rubbing her head and face made her cringe but there was a small, desperate, _starved_ part of her that leaned into his touch. "Keep your eye on the prize, alright? We're doing everything we can to better understand the limits of your condition so we can cure it."

That was a familiar explanation. Even Dr. Whale gave it sometimes.

"One day, you may not shift anymore." She opened her eyes and looked at him. "We're working our way towards that day."

* * *

It was getting late. Belle had already finalized her notes and packed up the paperwork she was studying. Everyone else was also finishing up. Tamara was filing again for clearance to bring some work home. Aurora had her bag already packed and approached Belle.

"So I'll call you over Skype tonight?" Aurora asked.

"Yeah." Belle said. She wasn't sure yet how much she should tell Aurora since Emma didn't seem keen on giving much information just yet. "Let's talk later. I'll just go and check on something."

Waving goodbye to Aurora, Belle headed down the hallway to Dr. Gold's office. He'd told them several times that they were welcome to drop by anytime they wanted to consult him. Maybe she could try seeing how much he meant that offer.

A few knocks at the door were met with no response.

It was possible that he wasn't inside or he didn't want to be bothered.

Her curiosity was eating away at her and the picture of the frightened teenager just wouldn't leave Belle's mind. It didn't line up completely with the image that Emma had given. That foggy, blurred woman seemed taller, a little older. Maybe in her twenties.

Of course, it was possible that Belle's mind was just trying to fill gaps and make connections where there were none.

Belle found herself pacing outside the door, even touching the handle a few times, only to change her mind and start pacing again. This was stupid. What was she going to say?

_Hi, Dr. Gold, I accidentally saw the file of Subject 204, can I see it properly because Dr. Whale took it away before I could finish reading?_

That wasn't going to work. Not even if he was " _fond_ " of her, as Emma had said.

"Belle, dearie, what are you doing here?"

Awkwardly spinning around to face him, Belle fidgeted and tried to figure out how to answer that.

There was way too long a pause before she finally managed to say, "Hi."

Dr. Gold raised an eyebrow and reached over to open the door to his office. "Is something the matter, dearie?"

"Sort of?" Wow. She was doing a terrible job of sounding like the eloquent and intelligent graduate she wanted him to see her as. He was probably already having second thoughts about inviting her to apply. Probably doubting accepting her into the program.

And now her mind was running away from her.

"Sort of." Dr. Gold gestured Belle into the office and showed her to a seat near the desk. It wasn't as organized as Belle had imagined. The walls and counters were covered in miscellaneous trinkets. It made the office look more like a pawnshop than a place to get work done. If it weren't for the file cabinets, Belle would have wondered if this was really an office where Dr. Gold did any actual work.

Dr. Gold shrugged off his labcoat and hung it on a hook at the door. Belle noticed there was an unusual amount of lose hair. And it wasn't grey like his own hair, but darker. Black or brown.

"Would you like to tell me more about that 'sort of?'" Dr. Gold's question interrupted Belle's observation of the labcoat.

As much as Belle judged those who used the expression, in her head, she found herself thinking it.

_YOLO._

"Earlier today, I accidentally saw some files that…" It didn't feel right to be the kind of person to throw Dr. Whale under the bus just like that. Belle ran her hands through her hair and adjusted her position in the seat. "Okay, let's just say I accidentally saw some files that I'm not yet authorized to see."

Dr. Gold leaned back on his chair. "Go on…"

Well he wasn't talking about kicking her out of the program yet. Maybe that was a good sign. Maybe. Hopefully?

"I'm probably _waaay_ out of line here," Belle said, "But could I maybe have a look again?" That came off a bit rude. Maybe she could add something to make it a little less rude. "Er… _authorized_ this time?"

There was no immediate answer. Dr. Gold clasped his hands over his stomach and seemed to be mulling over the question.

"Which file?"

Belle was too stunned by the question, she choked and coughed before finally responding, "204. Subject 204. Th-there was no name in the file… and I really didn't get to take a good look at it but… It just… looked interesting?"

She didn't think she was being very convincing. At all.

But he was _actually considering it._

"We can talk later about how you managed to come across that file," Dr. Gold said, "And I do hope you understand that it's classified."

"Yes, sir." That probably meant that telling Aurora about it might just be out of the question.

"How much of the file did you get to see?"

Belle looked down at the carpeting and tried to recall what she saw. It wasn't much, really. She was more drawn to the picture than the actual notes. A few things did stand out though.

"I remember the word lycanthrope. That's… is that really what I think it means?"

"If you think it means werewolf," Dr. Gold didn't even blink. "Then yes."

Belle felt her jaw drop. "Really?"

"Really." He opened his drawer and pulled out a thick binder. "Subject 204 has been in this facility for several years now. She's an interesting case and we're learning more and more about her every week." He opened the binder and patted the first page. "This binder is only an overview of the data we've collected on her so far."

It was hard to resist the urge to lean over and see the contents of the binder. Dr. Gold seemed to notice since he moved it closer to himself. "I have my doubts about whether or not you're prepared to join the team studying her, but let's try something."

"Sir?"

"Tomorrow is the full moon. Would you be willing to stay at the facility overnight and join us as we run some tests and observe the subject?" Dr. Gold picked up the binder and walked over the a scanner behind his chair. "You probably won't need to do anything, just take notes and share with us what you observe."

He started copying selected pages.

This felt surreal.

Once the pages he selected were done printing, Dr. Gold put them together and stapled them. For a moment, he held the papers close to his chest and looked Belle directly in the eye. "Understand this though, Belle. This is a _privilege_ and the only reason I'm allowing you access much earlier than initially planned is that you excel at interacting with Regina and deescalating her agitation."

Belle swallowed and nodded her head. Excitement was bubbling up within her and she couldn't help but fidget in her seat.

"Here. Go over these files tonight so you have a better understanding of what we'll show you tomorrow night." Dr. Gold reached over and handed the papers to her. "You can come in after lunch tomorrow. No need to attend the morning research session."

"Thank you, sir." With shaky hands, Belle neatly put the papers into a clearbook in her bag. A part of her still couldn't believe she'd actually managed to gain early access to classified files. This was both surreal and exciting.

"Run along now, dearie. I'll see you tomorrow."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So things are starting to pick up and Belle will finally get to meet 204 very very soon.
> 
> Also, there's something oddly satisfying about imaging Belle saying "yolo", even if just in her head. She just doesn't seem like the type, which makes it kind of funny.
> 
> On another note, I've been trying to sketch Ruby with her new Eleven-inspired 'do but I haven't yet come up with a portrait that I feel satisfied with.
> 
> So yeah. How'd you find this chapter and what are you looking forward to next? Have you got theories on how Ruby ended up in the facility? Maybe how she gradually stopped talking? I'd love to hear your thoughts. I have a Ruby-centric chapter I want to do in a couple of days, something that runs through how she ended up here. I'm still finding the right time to work that in.
> 
> Also, thank you to the lovely Konako for this lovely piece.  
> 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may or may not find another small clue about Granny, somewhere in this chapter.

_**SUBJECT 204** _

_"LYCANTHROPE"_

_HAIR COLOR:_ Brown*

 _EYE COLOR_ : Green*

 _BIRTHDATE:_ August 20, 1995

 _HEIGHT:_ 5'7"*

 _DATE CONFINED_ : May 30, 2010

 _DISTINGUISHING FEATURES:_ gunshot scars along ribs, acquired prior to confinement

 _ABILITIES*_ : unusual strength; heightened senses; can extend fingernails into claws; teeth tend to sharpen; eyes sometimes turn gold/yellow;

 _NOTES:_ Seems to have limited control over abilities; has tendency to exhibit more feral behavior when agitated or stressed; experiences headaches at least four days before the full moon; high pain threshold; capable of accelerated healing/regeneration; capable of being extremely dangerous; must be in silver restraints around the clock to ensure safety of staff and of subject

_*Features and abilities only applicable to "human" state, see "wolf" state for further details_

* * *

 

Belle read through the first page of the files Dr. Gold had put together for her. At the top corner was a picture of Subject 204, the same picture she'd seen when she accidentally looked at the paperwork Dr. Whale had dropped. The picture was faded and worn out and the copier only further lowered the image quality.

Taking into account that Subject 204 was confined in 2010, Belle figured that the picture was taken early on, around the time the subject was brought into the facility. She was fifteen.

She was _fifteen_ and she looked _terrified_.

She would be about twenty one now, turning twenty-two.

This person had been confined in the facility for _seven years._

And how even could a fifteen year old girl have gunshot scars? Was she being shot at so she could be subdued and captured?

Massaging the bridge of her nose, Belle tried to remind herself to look at this from a scientific perspective. This case was something major and it was understandable that the scientists would want to keep her in the facility to get as much data as possible. 204 was a _werewolf_ , after all.

Still, thinking of it like that made Belle's stomach churn.

She tried to remind herself of the facts. People with psychic abilities were becoming more common and some opportunistic gifteds had even managed to make names for themselves doing tricks for viral videos. " _Magicians_ " that excelled more with props and trickery than actual supernatural ability were becoming discredited.

But no cases were as _phenomenal_ as werewolves.

Still, why was 204 being confined at the facility? That's what Belle was curious about. It made sense that Emma was being confined as part of an agreement with police authorities. Could it be possible that a similar agreement was put in place for 204?

"204." Belle rolled the number out of her tongue and it didn't feel right.

She rifled through the paperwork, trying to find a name. Throughout the pages that had been scanned, the subject was consistently being referred to as 204 or Subject 204. Not even the biodata overview included 204's name. It did for Emma and Regina, but not for 204.

"Why can't I find your name?" Belle wondered out loud, looking again at the picture. The picture had been copied in black and white, but there was still a look in the girl's eyes that pulled at Belle. It made her feel worried and she couldn't help but recall the foggy image from Emma of the broken young woman hunched over and drained. "What happened to you?"

Vibrations and a familiar ringtone pulled Belle's attention away from the file. She turned to see her phone vibrating its way closer to the edge of the desk. Belle picked it up and answered Aurora's call.

Her face came into view on Belle's phone.

"Hi," Aurora said.

"Hi there," Belle kept the phone focused on her own face and was careful to keep the paperwork offscreen.

"What was it Emma showed you?" Aurora's brows furrowed as she recalled the lunchtime conversation, motioned her hands in a circle as if mentally backtracking. "You said something about someone whose file you saw among Dr. Whale's papers?"

Belle bit her lip and guiltily glanced at the files that Dr. Gold has specifically emphasized were classified.

"I… I think so." Belle hesitated. "I didn't get a good look at the file though, but the girl in the picture looked similar to what Emma showed me."

Aurora rubbed at her chin. "Hmm. That's interesting. Emma didn't really tell me much. Just that she might need help with something," She shrugged, "And to be honest, I'm not sure what to think. Emma is an experienced con artist and I have my doubts about whether or not Dr. Gold knows that Emma can link to and send messages the way she did with us."

"I don't think Dr. Gold knows." Belle glanced again at the files then put one of her books over the papers. "And I'm not sure what to think either about the image she showed me."

"Do you think we should take it seriously though?" Aurora asked. "Do you think Emma, maybe even Regina, need help somehow?"

"Help to do what, though?" Belle asked. "Escape?"

Aurora frowned. "Maybe. For Emma anyway. Regina still gets to go home, as far as I know." She waved her hands dismissively. "Either way, that's probably the last thing we should be doing. We could get into all kinds of legal trouble if we're involved in any escape plan she might have. She's a criminal, after all."

"She's scared though." Belle said. "I don't know what she's scared _of_ , but I can feel her fear when she sends messages to me."

"I felt that too, yeah…"

"Maybe we could just feel things out for now?" Belle said, "If Emma is trying to escape and is trying to use us to do that, we should definitely tell Dr. Gold. But for now, I think it's more or less harmless to be communicating with her?"

Aurora didn't seem instantly convinced and had to pause to think that over.

"It doesn't feel right not telling Dr. Gold though."

"It doesn't." Belle wasn't going to lie. She felt guilty about not telling Dr. Gold about the contact with Emma and the actual extent of Emma's abilities. "But maybe we could just give it a few more days? See what she's trying to do so we have more information if we _do_ choose to tell Dr. Gold?"

Aurora nodded. "Alright."

* * *

**_SUBJECT 204_ **

_"WOLF" STATE_

_PELT COLOR:_ Black

 _EYE COLOR:_ Gold/Yellow

 _DISTINGUISHING FEATURES:_ Ruffled fur along ribs due to scars

_SIZE:_

45 inches (foot to shoulder);

80 inches (body length)

 _WEIGHT:_ (fluctuating) 135lbs to 150lbs *average range

 _ABILITIES:_ enhanced strength; enhanced senses; accelerated healing/regeneration

 _NOTES:_ Generally feral, subject tends to have little recognition of staff when in "wolf" form; Strength fluctuates depending on certain variables (see Section III Page 24); aggressive and dangerous; weakened by silver and wolfsbane; must be restrained and caged during full moon to minimize risk to staff; may be sedated with wolfsbane (dose must always be precisely calculated [see notes on Subject 115, Section I Page 1 or refer to dosage notes on Subject 204, Section II Page 5])

* * *

Pain was shooting through her head in waves. Sometimes it felt blunt, like a pounding throb from the outside in, sometimes it felt sharp, like knives stabbing her from the inside out.

Most of the time, it felt like her skull was on fire and shrinking and growing at random intervals.

She groaned and buried her face in her shackled hands, wishing it would go away. Wishing she didn't have to go through this every single month.

Some months, they gave her painkillers to ease the shift.

This didn't seem like one of those months.

Not that she deserved it, right?

They had already extended great kindness to her by loosening the chains so she could pace her quarters or hide under the bed again. Another privilege they'd granted her was a fresh gown. That, and they did, kind of, let her have a bath. It was more of a test to see how well she could fight the shift while underwater, but it could still count as a bath.

More or less.

She released a sigh of relief when the pain finally passed, but kept her hands where they were, covering her face. Slowly, she moved them higher up, towards her forehead, then her hairline, then past that. After the tests yesterday (the other day? Telling the days was pretty much impossible by this point), they had held her down again to smoothen out the rushed haircut.

If there had been uneven tufts sticking out last time, there weren't any now. The short bristles covering her scalp tickled her palms and the sensation felt strange. It wasn't something she was familiar with.

The closest she could relate the texture and feeling to was when she would rub the sides of Peter's undercut whenever it was fresh from a trip to the barber. He seemed to like it when she did that.

Now, as she was doing it to her own head, it felt odd. Both her scalp and her hands could feel it. It was strange.

It was just hair, right? It shouldn't be such a big deal. They took her clothes and her home and her food. Why was her hair any different?

She wondered what she looked like now.

Mirrors weren't always within her line of sight and more often than not, the closest she came to seeing her reflection was on glass. That didn't provide a very clear image.

There had been a time when she spent a great deal of effort perfecting how she looked in the mirror. She had watched as many vlogs as she could find about lipstick and… and concealer. And founding… founder… foundation? And there was the eye stuff. Eye light? Eye lighter? No, that wasn't right.

She rubbed her hands over her head, trying to remember, but the memories felt so vague now.

There had been a time when she did something crazy with her hair. Not as crazy as shaving it all off like now… but crazy enough to really enrage Mother.

It was after checking out some tutorials and articles, she put together some homemade coloring and put it over parts of her hair. Mostly the tips. A few she attempted to make into streaks. The kitchen was a mess and there was red coloring all over the place. It stained her hands and her neck and her forehead and her clothes.

The moment mother walked in, she panicked and managed to think it was blood.

Frowning, the subject tried to remember what else happened, but the memory was elusive.

* * *

It was probably a good thing that Dr. Gold excused Belle from coming in early for the morning research session.

After the call with Aurora, Belle spent a few more hours going through 204's files and studying the biodata and the reports on some of the tests they had already conducted. It was fascinating and exciting but there was a part of Belle that also found it heartbreaking.

There were tests on how much weight 204 could carry in both her " _wolf_ " state and her " _human_ " state, and the " _limbo_ " state in between when her senses and abilities spiked just before transformation during the full moon. They had also conducted tests on the speed she could run and her endurance at maintaining such a pace.

Those were relatively standard, and Belle saw the merit in having an understanding of that.

But some tests seemed… intense?

There were notes on the rate at which 204 could heal from injuries. Even some notes on the depth, length and intensity of a wound to scar. The particular section Belle had been given was specific to lacerations. It featured an intensive list of healing rates lined up with metals and blades with varying levels of silver percentage in their composition. The file had an appendix that suggested seeing recorded footage of the healing rates.

Belle wasn't sure if she was prepared to see that kind of footage. Just imagining a team of scientists cutting into a young woman to see how fast she could heal was sickening. The thought wouldn't leave Belle's mind. It was nearly impossible to fall asleep to the very idea of some teenage girl being brought into a facility to be restrained and cut into and studied like a frog in science class.

That was difficult enough during her own biology classes. She had thrown up so many times, it became customary to have a bucket at the table whenever they had to dissect anything.

Even now, Belle felt queasy, and by the time she finally got her groggy, uneasy self to work, they were already about to start on some tests."Hi, sorry I'm late-"

"Yes, Gold gave you a free pass to skip the morning session." Dr. Whale waved her in with his scarred hand. There was an irritable edge to his voice and he seemed to be glaring at Belle as she took a seat next to Aurora. "We're about to conduct a few more tests with 201 and 223."

"Gold gave clearance for at least one of you to be in the room with 223 and another to be in a room with 221. You'll have one guard inside the room each, and more stationed outside. Just in case anything happens." As Dr. Whale absently rubbed at the scar while talking, Belle found herself wondering if the cut was caused by 204. She tried to recall the snippets of conversation that were overheard when Dr. Whale first came into the room with a bleeding hand.

Were there consequences that 204 was faced with after that incident?

"Belle. Aurora." Dr. Whale pointed at Belle then at Aurora. "Which one of you wants 223, and which one wants 201?"

Bella and Aurora exchanged glances. From behind them, Tamara audibly scoffed.

"I'm okay with being in the room with Emma." Belle said. "Is that okay with you?"

Aurora nodded. "Alright."

"Okay then." Dr. Whale gestured towards one door. "You can go ahead over there. Belle, you stay a moment. There's some briefing necessary on how to interact with 223."

As Aurora was escorted to the room where Regina was already waiting, Dr. Whale turned to face Belle. "As you know, 223 is a compulsive liar and an experienced con artist. And she's aggravatingly sarcastic. Gold seems to like how you interact with the subjects so you can probably get away with doing that thing you do where you connect with them."

Belle suppressed a frown at the apparent disapproval and judgment Dr. Whale had for something as basic as empathy.

"Just be aware of the manipulation she's capable of." Dr. Whale said. "Don't let her get to your head. She seems to be excellent at communicating telepathically with 201 but has difficulty connecting with other subjects. Gold suspects however that 223 may be more capable of reading minds than she's letting on, so try to keep your thoughts controlled when you're in the room with her."

"Yes, sir."

A guard led Belle to the room where Emma was already waiting. What was surprising about this first time face-to-face encounter was that the girl had her hands cuffed behind the back of the chair she was sitting on. That, and a fresh bruise was developing along her cheek.

"I'd shake your hand, but they're otherwise occupied at the moment." Emma nodded to the chair. "Feel free to take a seat."

Involuntarily glancing towards the camera as if to ask them why Emma was in this condition, Belle had to keep her mouth shut and just take a seat.

If she was really going to see 204 tonight, the last thing she needed to be doing was asking questions that might agitate Dr. Whale.

_Wait, really? You're seeing 204 tonight?_

Belle had to hide the ripple of shock that went through her every time Emma started talking telepathically. In a movement that was as subtle as she could make it, Belle nodded.

 _Can you like not be so obvious? Just think your answers._ God _._

Sorry.

_Was that so hard?_

Belle set her jaw and tried not to let her annoyance get the better of her.

"Both subjects have a set of cards on the table in front of them." Dr. Whale's voice came in through the room's main speakers. "They are both to choose a card from the deck. They may ask for assistance from their observer to manipulate the deck to find the chosen card. They can also manipulate the deck themselves without physically touching the cards. Ideally, we want them to choose the same card. None of them may look at the card they pick until they have revealed the number and shape of the card they've chosen."

Emma raised an eyebrow. "Even if I can only see stuff and Regina can only move stuff?"

"Let's see if you can collaborate."

_We can do it, actually. But I don't like letting them know how good we've gotten at tagteaming things behind their backs. How do you think the box conveniently fell so far and spread out so many files yesterday?_

It was hard for Belle to keep her expression neutral as shock rippled through her.

"Fiiiine." Emma groaned out the word. "Tell us when to start then."

"Whenever you're ready." Dr. Whale said.

Emma took a deep breath and let it out in a long, low whoosh. She shifted in her seat and straightened up as best she could despite her wrists cuffed to the chair. The movement shifted her hair back, making the bruise on her cheek more visible.

_Picked a fight with that guard last night. I told him I wanted to go for a walk and he told me it was outside of my exercise hours. I don't even know when my exercise hours are anymore. What time is it, actually?_

Belle glanced at her watch.

_Huh. Didn't know it would be 1:15pm already. I haven't been given lunch yet._

"Okay, I think I can see the contents of my deck." Emma said out loud. "Now I'm going to try and figure out Regina's."

_Did you notice they cuffed Regina as well?_

Belle had arrived and been brought into this room so abruptly she hadn't had time to properly look at the cameras or the readings yet. Could that really be the case? They could just be trying to put in extra measures of security. Regina had been showing some signs of a bad mood lately.

_Bullshit and you know it._

There was a sudden rush that Belle couldn't explain. It was like taking an extra step at the top of a flight of stairs. She thought she was falling.

She tried to lean forward and shift in her seat but was surprised to find that she couldn't move. Her hands were behind her back, wrists encased by cold metal. In front of her was Aurora, watching in awe as the cards were being spread out across the table. There was a dull ache coming from the sides of her head as she concentrated on moving the cards and channeling Emma's ability to view through the cards.

Belle blinked and she was looking at Emma again.

_Dammit, at least try to hide your surprise. You're lucky they're more focused on me and Regina than you and Aurora._

A warning about suddenly being pushed into Regina's mind would have been nice.

_They're treating us more like prisoners by the day. They're getting comfortable with seeing us as their lab rats. You've started thinking about it, too. Aurora doesn't like what's going on either. She's scared of getting on the wrong side of the law or Gold or whatever, but I think somewhere in there, she knows that none of this is right. I just don't know yet what will win over when push comes to shove- her fear of the law, or her personal code of ethics or morals or whatever._

Emma looked Belle up and down.

_I don't know what you'll choose in the end either. But I can feel you getting reaaaally doubtful about this place._

Belle still didn't know what to think.

"Could you be so kind as to spread out the cards and take the eleventh one from the top?" Emma looked like the effort she'd put into using her powers was starting to take its toll on her. Her lips were getting chapped while her skin was starting to pale. She was also breathing more heavily than earlier.

 _Look, I_ know _something bad is going to happen. I just haven't figured out what it is._

Belle took her eyes off of Emma and focused on spreading the cards out and counting until she reached the eleventh card. She pulled it out to see the Queen of Hearts.

_I don't know for sure yet who we can trust in here, but I know Gold and Whale have bigger plans than they're letting on. They're careful though about focusing too much on it around me. I think it has something to do with 204._

"Belle, Aurora, can you show us the cards the subjects have given you?"

Belle showed the card to Emma then to the cameras.

"Both picked out the Queen of Hearts. Well done. Now let's try this test again, but this time, Aurora will pick a card, but won't tell anyone."

How did Emma even know about 204? How could she have seen a subject that's under such high security? And, according to the files, being kept in an isolated area with contact only with select guards and staff?

_There's one guard I think we can trust. Buckle up._

Even if Belle braced herself, she still felt caught off guard by the rush, and it was stronger this time.

Now, she was standing stiffly at attention, a gun at one hip and a prod at another. There was concern and guilt in her heart. She was bothered by the precaution of cuffing the subjects. She was thinking.

She was thinking about 204.

She was thinking about sitting at the edge of 204's bed and offering a half-eaten sandwich and being guilty about how it wasn't a hot, fresh meal. She was thinking about how impulsive a decision it had been to tamper with the cameras and give her half-eaten lunch to 204. She was thinking about how frightening it had been to take such a stupid risk. She was thinking about how stupid it was that she was thinking of taking another similar stupid risk the next time she was assigned to watch 204. She was thinking about how she was here watching the interns instead of being assigned to watch 204 on her latest torture disguised as scientific experimentation. She was feeling turmoil at being here and doing nothing and just following orders.

She… was feeling _oddly lightheaded_.

Belle felt the rush again and found herself back in her seat in front of Emma.

"Give me the third card from the left."

Disoriented and doing her best not to show it, Belle counted towards that card and picked it up. "Five of clubs."

_We were in there a little too long and I think she was starting to feel it. I haven't like talked to her yet but I think she's the one guard in this dump that we can trust._

Trust to do what?

_I don't know. Keep the bad thing that's gonna happen from happening?_

"That's exactly the card that Aurora picked." Dr. Whale's voice came in through the speakers. "We'll take a break now since there were some unusual spikes in the readings and I want to analyze that."

_Oops._

The break was probably a good idea. Emma looked drained and she was wincing like her head hurt.

_I'll be fine. Just… next time we can make contact, let me know how it goes with 204 tonight._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am slowburning the crap outta this but yeah. Ready yourself for the next chapter, due tomorrow or Wednesday. That one's gonna be a bit of a kicker.
> 
>  
> 
> [Also, this piece illustrated by Konako may be relevant to your interests](http://konako.tumblr.com/post/159936287141)
> 
> Also, feel free to check out the previous chapter. That's got a new illustration in it from Konako as well.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. Before we start, let's give some credit where it's due. HollowShadowWolf (Wolfie) is the best cheerleader 5ever and has been gracious (more or less) about all the beating they get from the angst of this story. Konako is perf because I now have two illustrations from this story by her and it's just amazing. Look her up because it's worth it yo. (you can also view her art in the previous two chapters because i couldn't resist slapping them on here) And then let's not forget FromThoughtsToInk (Andi). Check out her angsty af fic Beauty and the Beast. It gives me life. I think at this point we're trying to out angst each other.
> 
> This chapter took a lot longer to write than the others and I went through several versions till I figured out what I felt would provide the most impact. I won't spoil anything for you, and I'll just share my thoughts at the end of the chapter. But this one will be a bit of a kicker so as Emma said last chapter, "Buckle up."

It was agony.

Her skull felt like it was trying to split itself apart. The bright lights in her quarters were aggravating the headache and hiding under her bed did little to alleviate the pain.

Recently, she'd developed a habit of pulling at her hair when this agony came over her. Now, it was nearly impossible to grasp at the brutally short strands. What she was doing instead was clenching her hands into tight fists that dug her claws into her palms.

 _Claws_.

She couldn't turn them back into fingernails anymore. She'd been trying all day. They stayed sharp and strong and they were now cutting into her palms. That was another habit she'd acquired in recent years.

The worst of the pain was centered around her head, but it wasn't isolated to that area. Her jaw felt tight and tense. Her skin was itching and crawling and burning up. Her stomach was twisting itself into knots and knots and knots of fire.

Whimpers and whines were coming out of her.

She was breathing heavily and trembling and curled up into a ball and everything she knew right now was _pain_.

The door to her quarters slid open and she saw boots approaching her. "Get out from under there, 204."

She hesitated, recognizing the voice as belonging to the guard she disliked. The one that didn't hold back when assigned to subduing her. The one that was rough when she was being transported. The one that taunted her when she was uncertain.

"My dog can follow commands faster than you." The familiar spark made her skin crawl. She saw the prod come in to view as he held it low so she could get a good look at it. "Get your ass out of there 204."

Still feeling the pain reverberating through her body, the subject slowly inched her way out of the bed. Agony shot through her limbs as she finished pulling herself out. There was a soft squelch as she pressed her palms against the floor to push herself up into a standing position. The scent of blood was fogging her senses.

It was her own blood but she was so hungry, it might as well have been gravy or barbeque sauce or cheese.

A gurgle rumbled in her clenching stomach.

The wave of pain was finally starting to recede, but it didn't go away entirely, merely dulling to a throb.

"There we go." Gaston motioned for the other guards to move around her. "Now face the wall, hands behind your back. You know the drill."

* * *

"Did you study the files thoroughly?"

It was a maze of hallways through the facility's lower floors and Belle doubted she would have found her way around without Dr. Gold to escort her. She also wouldn't have gotten far without Dr. Gold's security pass either.

"Yes, sir."

They passed several doors and it was hard to keep track of all the labels she sighted and they ranged from things like "rats" to "apes", which was standard enough, until they passed other doors with labels like "Yeti" and "Jersey Beast".

"Sir, were you considering letting any of the other interns study 204 as well?" Belle hoped he'd been considering Aurora as well. Not telling her the full story last night made Belle feel guilty. And there was also the hostility Tamara would be showing from now on if Belle's involvement with 204 would become regular.

"Maybe Tamara." Dr. Gold said, "She's not good with deescalation but I like the firmness with which she speaks to Regina. With the two of you working together, we could have a… what's the term?"

Just when Belle thought they were nearing the end of the facility, Dr. Gold led her to another elevator which went deeper down.

" _Good Cop and Bad Cop_ is what it was called, I believe. That's the dynamic you could have with Tamara." Dr. Gold chuckled to himself as the elevator slowed to a stop. "With how much time we spend down here, some of us are very behind on the latest media. Regardless, Whale and I had been talking about having the two of you collaborate more."

The elevator doors opened and Dr. Gold led the way out. "I was hoping to observe Tamara and yourself for several more sessions, but since you've sped up the process, I may be approaching her about 204 any day now."

"Thank you, sir." The thought of working more closely with Tamara made Belle uneasy. Attempts to get to know the girl better tended to be met with hostility and sarcasm.

"There is so much more data in 204's file, but the overview I gave you should be enough for now. I didn't want to overwhelm you, dearie."

"Er… thank you, sir."

The images of a girl being cut by silver blades and metals still kept running through Belle's mind, still made her stomach churn. It was hard not to cringe visibly as the elevator doors finally opened into another hallway. She had to stay calm. Emma was so fond of pointing out how transparent Belle and her expressions were. It was important now for her to maintain her composure.

"By the way, I've spoken with Dr. Whale." Dr. Gold led the way past several doors and swiped his keycard over another scanner. "He claims he'll make sure to be more careful about keeping classified files _classified_."

The doors opened up but Dr. Gold stepped in front of Belle, blocking her way and shielding her view of the room. "I hope we have an understanding dearie, that I can expect you to be at least a little bit more careful than Dr. Whale."

Meeting his eyes, Belle kept her face as neutral as she could. "I understand."

"Good." Dr. Gold turned and led the way inside. The doors shut behind Belle as she took in the new location. There were monitors and file cabinets and shelves with miscellaneous binders all over the room, but the main part that pulled Belle's attention was the thick glass that spanned a whole wall, from floor to ceiling.

Belle walked closer to the glass.

The room on the other side was bare in comparison to this one, with just one monitor. Several guards were stationed inside, piling over and restraining someone. Chains rattling under them were bolted to the floor. The guards were maneuvering farther from the bolts until the chains were pulled taut. Dr. Whale and Dr. Hopper had their backs turned to the glass and were focused on the subject.

An arm was being stretched out from under the pile of guards. It was thin and pale and ended in claws instead of fingernails. The skin under the manacle around the person's wrist was red and raw. Once the guards had steadied the arm enough, Dr. Hopper was able to take a blood sample.

Growls and screams suddenly filled the air, startling Belle and making her jump. She tore her eyes away from the scuffle to see that Dr. Gold was standing over another scientist manning the controls. The microphones must have been turned on and now the sounds of the struggle were filling the control room.

Returning her attention to the other room, Belle drew closer to the glass.

Dr. Whale and Dr. Hopper had finished up what they were doing and starting to exit, walking just a bit faster than usual. The guards were signaling to each other and coordinated moving away from the subject, forming a loose circle around her. Belle noticed that they were all brandishing electric prods that sparked to life.

Now that the guards had moved away from the subject, Belle had a clearer view.

And it hurt.

The long brown hair from the picture and from Emma's image was gone. Instead, scanners and wires covered a scalp that held just a thin layer of very closely cropped hair.

Where there may have once been deep green eyes full of life and energy, there instead were sunken, tired eyes with a dullness to them that hurt to look at. The high cheekbones from the teenage picture were exaggerated on her face now, bony over the sunken features.

There was a thick collar around the subject's neck, most likely lined with silver, based on the irritated skin underneath it. A thin hospital gown was draped over her, and despite its looseness, the emaciated form underneath could still be made out.

Horror and pity wrenched at Belle's stomach and she felt lightheaded.

Folding her arms across her chest and biting her bottom lip, Belle tried to keep her face relaxed and expressionless. She needed to keep her composure on the outside even if on the inside, she felt turmoil.

Subject 204 wasn't growling or screaming anymore, but she was breathing heavily and every so often would cry out and recoil.

"The transformation should be starting soon." Dr. Gold was now standing next to Belle. He handed her a clipboard. "You can just note what you observe for now. Tomorrow we can go over more data and run some proper tests. Tonight, dearie, just watch and observe since what you're about to witness is the spectacle of a lifetime."

Everything hurt.

* * *

It was like she wasn't getting enough air no matter how much she breathed in and out. Her lungs were on fire and she rubbed at her head, reminded once again that there were no longer any strands she could pull at.

Her stomach was cold and claws were tearing it up from the inside.

Letting out a long, low whine, she clenched her fists behind her head and hid her face between her elbows. Her palms were being punctured by her claws again, but she didn't particularly care about that right now. The smell of blood hit her nostrils and made her stomach rumble.

Breathe.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Her jaw was clenched tight and her teeth were pushing against her gums and her lips and it hurt and her eyes were burning up and…

It passed.

The agony dulled to a throb.

Unclenching her fists, she put her damp palms flat against the floor and pushed herself up into a sitting position. There was still an ache in her head, like a band of metal was clamping down on her skull, getting tighter and tighter.

She wished it would just go away.

She wished they had the cure already.

She wished she wasn't a monster anymore.

But she _was_.

And time was ticking down to when the monster came out of her completely.

The guards were stationed just out of her reach if she pulled the chains taut. Most of them were at the ready with their prods. The one guard who treated her better than she deserved was just standing and not brandishing any weapons. Dammit, what was her name again? Milan? MULAN. That was it.

They made eye contact and though Mulan kept her mouth neutral, her eyes looked… pained? Concerned? Pitying?

It was hard to read, but the subject knew it was more than she deserved.

Rubbing at her forehead with her bloodstained hands, wishing the pain would go away, she looked at the glass wall in front of her. It was tinted, but she could make out shapes of the people watching her. She tried to focus instead on her reflection. It was hazy, but she could make out the silhouette of her crouched, scrawny form. She could make out the clear shape of her head, no longer framed by hair.

She couldn't make out her eyes, but they should be starting to glow yellow soon.

Another wave of pain blasted through her and it was more intense than ever. It burned through her skin, her nerves, her very bones. The ache in her head was splitting, breaking through her skull and her jaw and her teeth and her nose.

* * *

"It's starting." Dr. Gold's teeth gleamed as he beamed wide. He rubbed his palms together and turned to Belle. "It's a beautiful sight that leaves me in awe, no matter how many times I've already seen it."

The excitement on the head scientist's face was almost manic, and it unnerved Belle. She tried to return his smile without cringing. "I'm looking forward to it."

Hugging the clipboard close to her chest, Belle returned her attention to Subject 204.

The poor girl was thrashing and screaming in pain, sending the chains rattling back and forth. Surrounding her, the guards were brandishing their prods and prepared for… whatever danger they were anticipating. Belle noticed the guard that had been assigned to watch Aurora earlier today was in a prepared stance but not yet drawing her weapon.

"Lower the volume of the speakers a bit, Igor." Dr. Gold instructed, before turning to speak to Belle again. "As much as I adore the spectacle of it, I can't stand the screaming."

This was sickening.

A part of Belle wanted to just turn away from the agonized screams, look away from the thrashing, emaciated form on the other side of the glass, run away from this facility that was treating a human being like less than an animal.

Breathe normally, Belle reminded herself. Just breathe normally and stay calm and neutral.

It was hard, though.

Belle set her jaw and watched as Subject 204's screaming and thrashing grew more frenzied. A glance at the readings showed that everything was spiking up to dangerous levels.

And yet, none of the scientists and staff was looking the least bit concerned. If anything, they seemed accustomed to the sight. There were no whispers or exclamations of surprise or distress. Belle thought she might have heard Dr. Hopper say the readings were normal and consistent with the previous full moons.

"It seems to be happening faster though, doesn't it?" Dr. Gold pointed at the subject. "Limbs are already starting to shift to a quadruped, digitigrade structure."

"There's been a consistent increase in transformation speed in the past ten months," Dr. Hopper shifted through his notes. "Ever since we implemented the new variables and SOP's."

"Good, good." Dr. Gold nodded. "That means it's working."

Belle tore her eyes away from Subject 204 contorting into unnatural positions to accommodate the shifting anatomy. Though the screams coming through the speakers were at a lower volume, it still tugged and twisted at Belle's heart.

The gleeful look on Dr. Gold's face made Belle want to scream at him to stop and do something, anything to ease the girl's pain.

Instead, Belle said, "What's working?"

A more guarded expression crossed Dr. Gold's face as he faced Belle. "We have a longterm program in place for 204, the details of which will take time to explain. Only a select number of us know the full scope of the program. That's classified information for now, dearie."

Belle was about to nod when a piercing scream came out of Subject 204. It was longer and louder than ever. Fur was growing all along the subject's skin and her bones were contorting as the scream turned into a howl that sent chills up Belle's spine.

A large wolf stood in place of the pained woman. The collar around its neck, though adjusted to fit the larger frame, still looked much too tight and dark fur awkwardly stuck out around the metal. Whimpers came out of the wolf as it shifted its weight and shook its massive paws, as if trying to shake off the cuffs clamped tightly around its forelegs.

With the hospital gown reduced to torn shreds at the wolf's feet, Belle could see the ruffled fur along its ribs where the bullet scars probably lay.

"Who wants to run the exercises?" Dr. Gold asked.

He and Belle turned to see Dr. Hopper and Dr. Whale exchange glances. The former looked nervous and uneasy while the latter looked irritable.

"I did the last one." Dr. Whale grumbled.

"I…" Dr. Hopper fidgeted with the paperwork in his hands. "I usually do the post-transformation readings."

Dr. Gold's frown made them both shrink. "It's like training a pitbull. Honestly, there's nothing to be afraid of while the guards are _right there._ "

Walking past the two scientists, Dr. Gold placed his clipboard on a desk and pulled off his labcoat. "Must I do everything myself?" He hung the coat and opened the door to the other room, striding in without flinching when the wolf started to snarl and bark at him.

Dr. Gold pointed to an assistant. "Igor, bring me the meat." A hunched over assistant even shorter than Dr. Gold came scurrying over with a tray full of raw meat.

At the sight and scent of the meat, the wolf grew frenzied in its barks and growls, lunging and pulling at the chains so violently that Belle thought they might break. Even the guards seemed to be concerned about that because they looked tense. The sympathetic guard had also given in and drawn her weapon.

"Remember our training, dearie." Taking a slab of meat with one of his gloved hands, Dr. Gold approached the wolf but was careful to stay just out of its reach. "You can only have this if you behave."

The wolf didn't seem to understand a word because it continued to pull at the chains and growl, drool flying as it struggled to reach its target.

One of the assistants handed Dr. Gold a prod, longer than the ones the guards used. He pushed a button to activate it before dropping the meat right between the wolf's paws. Before it could sink its teeth into the food, Dr. Gold drove the prod right into the side of its neck. A sizzling, crackling sound echoed through the speakers, punctuated by a high-pitched yelp.

The wolf staggered back, shaking its head side to side, sending spittle flying.

Still, it wasn't ready to be subdued just yet. It lunged forward, trying again to get at the meat, only to be shocked again, this time along the cheek.

Yelping and whimpering, the wolf pawed at its face.

"Gold, don't forget the sensors on its head." Dr. Whale spoke into the microphones to warn Dr. Gold. "The prod might affect the readings."

Dr. Gold nodded towards the glass but didn't seem to like being told what to do.

The wolf had recovered from the shock but was hesitating now. It shuffled around, too agitated to stay still but not allowed enough slack on the chains to really pace. There was no growling for now, but the wolf's lips were curled back to reveal dangerously sharp teeth and the fur along its neck and shoulders were standing in spikes.

"That's better dearie, but not quite there yet." Dr. Gold was speaking to the wolf again and took a few steps closer, stopping just next to the meat, and definitely within the wolf's reach.

Realizing the distance was much closer now, the wolf tried again, this time with its paws outstretched, aiming for Dr. Gold. With reflexes surprising for his age and stature, he gave the wolf another shock, this time driving the prod into its chest. The crackling sound was louder than ever and Belle suspected that Dr. Gold used a higher voltage this time.

The wolf collapsed, whimpering. It had its ears back and its tail between its legs. Shivers rippled through its body.

Gripping the clipboard provided to her with trembling hands, Belle had to remind herself to breathe slowly and keep her face relaxed. Her jaw was sore from being clenched so tight- something she hadn't even been aware she was doing. She also forced her face and shoulders to relax.

If she came charging in there right now, clipboard a-blazing, screaming about humane treatment, she would most likely be thrown out and banned from the facility. What good would that do anyone?

"There we go." Dr. Gold picked up the slab of meat and brought it close to the wolf's face, dangling it just inches from its nose. It was now either too weakened or too frightened to reach for the meat. "That's a good wolf."

When the wolf continued to stay still with its ears back and its eyes so wide the whites were visible from here, Dr. Gold seemed satisfied and put the meat down in front of the wolf's nose then took a few steps backwards.

Cautiously, hesitantly, the wolf lifted its head and glanced at the meat then at Dr. Gold.

There was a tense moment of silence.

The wolf kept its eyes on Dr. Gold as it sniffed at the meat, then licked at it. Finally, the wolf tore into the slab, digging into it with gusto.

From where she was standing, Belle saw the poor thing must have been starving. Besides the ruffled fur along its ribs, there was the very fact that its pelt loosely clung to its very visible ribcage. Now that the fur along its back was starting to lie flat, Belle could see the protrusions of the wolf's spine.

This was _not_ a healthy wolf.

How could they be treating it like this?

How could they be treating _her_ like this?

Belle couldn't stomach a dog being treated this way, what more this… _this person_? She may be in a " _wolf state_ " now, but wasn't she still a person in there somewhere? Didn't she still retain her humanity? Her basic right to just… _not_ be treated like that?

Stay calm. Belle had to remember to keep herself together, no matter how much she wanted to scream and run in there and stop this.

This wasn't an _it_.

This was a _her._

Dr. Gold had repeated the exercise and the wolf was much more docile this time, waiting for permission to eat.

The sight of this weakened, scrawny frame curled up and waiting to be allowed to eat made Belle feel sick and she had to swallow back the bile rising in her throat.

It was as Dr. Gold was getting confident and crouching down to handfeed the wolf that she struck.

With a snarl rumbling deep in her chest, the wolf lunged for Dr. Gold, snapping her jaws just short of his face as he pulled back on reflex. After that failed initial attack, the wolf immediately moved again, pouncing at the scientist and knocking him over.

Before she could dig her teeth into him, the guards took action, several pulling the wolf off by the chains, while the rest gave it painful shocks from their prods.

The crackling sounds filled the speakers, almost louder than the wolves wails.

As the guards subdued the wolf until it was lying on the floor in a curled up ball, the assistants checked on Dr. Gold. Their fuss over him seemed to irritate him as he brushed them off.

"Get off me!" The anger was clear in his voice as he pushed passed the assistants.

Belle's stomach lurched when she realized that Dr. Gold was holding a knife.

This was wrong. She couldn't just stand and watch this. Resolving to do something to stop this, Belle started moving towards the door, but nearly crashed into Dr. Hopper.

She tried to sidestep him but he blocked her way and bent down to put both hands on her shoulders. "Belle, what are you doing?" His voice was a low whisper and he made it a point to glance at Dr. Whale, who was engrossed in the scene unfolding on the other side of the glass.

Dr. Gold was now crouching over the wolf while the guards held it down by the chains. "Remind me again how badly pure silver can burn you." The wolf was snapping and trying to reach him until one of the big male guards managed to loop rope around the wolf's snout in a makeshift muzzle.

"We can't just…" Belle struggled to keep her voice under a whisper as she watched in horror as Dr. Gold pressed the flat of the blade against the wolf's cheek. The agonized whines that came out of the wolf were heartwrenching and sickening and Belle felt like she was going to throw up.

"We _can_." Dr. Hopper was also wincing at the wolf's cries, muffled by her muzzled snout but still more than just audible. "We have to."

"I can't just watch this and… and…" Belle closed her mouth when Dr. Whale glanced in their direction.

"I'm in charge of maintaining Subject 204's health and lead the regular tests to monitor her vitals." Dr. Hopper straightened up and put his hands behind his back. He spoke at a normal tone now, probably to keep Dr. Whale form getting suspicious. "I should be able to authorize you to join my team in checking on her when she shifts back."

There was a lump in Belle's throat and she felt her eyes watering but she had to fight it all back. The look in Dr. Hopper's eyes showed that he could at least partially relate to what she was feeling and was offering the one way she could do something without compromising Dr. Gold's plan.

The wolf's whimpers were softer now- weak and defeated. Dr. Gold was standing over her, brandishing his blade and watching her cringe when it came close.

At Dr. Gold's signal, the guards started to move off of the wolf, although the one aggressive guard was getting a proper muzzle from an assistant and strapping it onto the wolf's face. When she turned her head and tried to shake it off, Belle saw a deep cut from snout through cheek to jaw. It wasn't healing as fast as the notes said it would normally heal for a regular blade.

Why did Dr. Gold even carry a blade supposedly made of "pure silver"?

"The control tests have mixed results sometimes, usually on the first day of full moon." Dr. Gold was looking at Belle through the glass and giving an explanation for her benefit. Still, as far as Belle was concerned, she doubted she would find understanding in the way the wolf was being treated. "But we have noticed an increase in success rates with the combination of punishment and reward."

Belle felt at a loss for words.

When Dr. Gold started conducting another test, Belle had to remind herself she was deep in the facility with hardly a clue how to get out from this area. She couldn't entertain ridiculous thoughts of running in and setting the wolf free from its captivity. But god, how badly she wished she could do something, _anything_ to free the wolf of this abuse at this very moment.

This test required the guards to put more slack into the wolf's chains so it could move in a small circle.

Belle felt her skin crawl when Dr. Gold started luring and shocking the muzzled wolf into walking left then right, back then forward at his command. She was pained and terrified and several times tried to snap at Dr. Gold, despite the muzzle. This only caused her to receive additional shocks from both scientist and the guards.

This was inhumane. How were they allowed to treat any living being like this? It was illegal to train dogs this way, why was it any different for… for a werewolf?

As the test wore on, there was a moment where the wolf's attempts to attack grew to be less frequent, more halfhearted. It was starting to timidly follow Dr. Gold's commands to move left, right, backward or forward.

"The wolf's heartrate is growing erratic, and her blood pressure is dropping." Dr. Hopper had left the glass to monitor the readings and lines of worry had begun form on his wide forehead. He pushed a button to activate the microphone to the room's speakers. "Dr. Gold, sir, I suggest finishing up the session soon. The wolf's vitals are reaching some dangerous levels."

"Give me more time, Hopper." Now that the wolf seemed to be submitting, Dr. Gold was requiring more and more from it. "Gaston, give the wolf's chains a little more slack." At the superior guard's gesture, the team adjusted the chains. In its frightened, exhausted state, the wolf just lowered its head as they made their adjustments.

"Come now, dearie, let's see you go clockwise for me." Dr. Gold was brandishing the prod again and bringing it down on the whimpering wolf. She was struggling to understand and obey his commands in one go.

"Dr. Gold, the wolf's vitals are reaching concerning levels." Sweat was starting to coat Dr. Hopper's forehead.

"How concerning?" Dr. Whale asked, moving over to get a better look at the readings.

Wiping at his forehead, Dr. Hopper turned to face Dr. Whale. "Remember how Subject 115 stopped healing?" Dr. Hopper glanced at Belle and lowered his voice, but she still managed to make out his whisper. "Shortly before total organ failure?"

"Shit." Dr. Whale frowned at the screen.

Belle returned her attention to see that the wolf's snout was foaming up inside the muzzle, saliva dribbling down her lips as she panted heavily. Her movements were clumsy and unsteady as she limped in circles with the painful guidance of the electric prod.

"Dr. Gold, please, finish up." Dr. Hopper's worry was starting to leech into his voice. "The readings are showing that her healing abilities are faltering. It's also getting late and the transformation should be starting in an hour or two. Her vitals are reaching critical levels."

Dr. Gold was barely listening, "Just a little more, Hopper. I know what I'm doing."

"Gold, give the thing a break." It was Dr. Whale speaking into the microphone now. "We don't want another 115 on our hands."

The wolf was very unsteady now, and the panting seemed more like struggles to breathe than anything else. Still, Dr. Gold was pushing her past her limits, driving the prod into her and causing her to wail and jolt everytime she felt the current coursing through her.

Belle couldn't stand by and just watch this. Pushing past a guard stationed at the door, Belle burst into the room. "Dr. Gold, please! Stop!"

"I'm done when I saw I'm done!" Dr. Gold pressed the prod into the wolf's shoulder and didn't pull back. The crackling sound filled her ears and burning hair reached Belle's nostrils as the wolf's cries echoed throughout the room.

"STOP!" Without thinking or hesitating anymore, Belle charged forward and slapped the prod out from Dr. Gold's hands, sending it flying to the side. The guard, Gaston, just barely dodged out of the way.

"Dearie." Dr. Gold's face was stiff. Anger burned in his eyes but his voice was eerily calm. "What do you think you're doing?"

"You were close to killing her!" Belle snapped before she could stop herself.

"I knew what I was doing!" Dr. Gold was yelling now. "I had this _UNDER CONTROL_!"

A retort was just at the tip of Belle's tongue, but she stopped short when she saw that the wolf was lying still, eyes closed.

Belle rushed towards the wolf's still form, only to be pulled back by one of the guards. Despite Belle's desperate struggles to get free and go to the wolf, the guard's grip remained firm around her waist. "I need to check on her! I need to-"

"Take it easy." The guard turned Belle around and gripped her by the shoulders. "Let Hopper handle it first." This was the sympathetic guard, the one that Emma was thinking of trusting. A glance at the guard's uniform showed the name 'Li.'

Belle clutched the elbows of the guard's sleeves. "We can't keep letting them treat her like this." There was an expression that flitted across the her eyes, before she looked left and right, then back at Belle. "Aren't you worried about her, too?"

A torn expression came over Li's face. "I worry a great deal." She straightened up, face now neutral and guarded. "But we are not in the right positions to stop any of this. We do what we can."

Following the guard's gaze, Belle saw that Dr. Hopper was already attending to the wolf's needs. Meanwhile Dr. Gold was no longer in the room. Dr. Whale was giving instructions to the assistants for items and preparations required by Dr. Hopper.

"Can I go now?" Belle gestured towards the scientists and assistants attending to the wolf. "Dr. Hopper said I could assist him with the wolf's health needs."

For a moment, the guard looked like she wanted to say something, but chose not to and instead simply released Belle and nodded.

It was tempting to stop and ask the guard for her first name, but Belle knew they weren't exactly at that level of closeness yet. The connection Belle felt with the guard was artificial, brought on by the brief stay in her mind. Still, maybe developing a relationship of some sort with this guard could be useful.

 _Useful for what,_ Belle wasn't sure yet, and she chose not to dwell on it just yet.

Upon reaching Dr. Hopper and his team, Belle saw that the wolf was barely conscious, but alive. They kept her snout muzzled for safety, and the chains had been tightened down again so the wolf was kept lying on her side with limited free movement.

"What can I do?" Belle asked.

"She's starting to stabilize now that the shocks aren't constantly coursing through her body." Dr. Hopper said, "But her healing is still delayed. There are no broken bones but she's suffering from some damaged tissue and severe burns."

Crouching down next to Dr. Hopper, Belle got a good look at the burns riddling the wolf's body. The fur was singed and some parts were now hairless and raw, some bleeding. A long, low whine came out of the wolf.

"Those should be able to heal in several hours, we just need to treat them for now, until the transformation sets in." Dr. Hopper continued giving Belle an explanation to what was going on. "When the transformation sets in, that should trigger enough of a spike in her system for her healing to start working again. Because at the moment…" A glance at the monitor in the room listing an overview of the wolf's vitals told Dr. Hopper what he needed to know. "Her accelerated healing doesn't seem to be kicking in at all."

With Dr. Gold gone and Dr. Whale out of his element, Dr. Hopper was taking charge and though Belle had only been training under him for a few sessions, it was surprising to see the authority he was capable of exhibiting. He led Belle and the rest of the team in monitoring the wolf, treating her burns and ensuring her heartbeat and breathing were normalizing.

Every so often, the wolf would let out a whine and look around at them in fear and it broke Belle's heart. There were also shudders that ran through the poor thing's body whenever they would administer treatment to a burn.

Time seemed to stretch on forever before Dr. Hopper noticed changes in the wolf's vitals and told everyone to loosen the chains and then back away.

The transformation was starting up again.

It wasn't as frenzied as earlier, possibly because the wolf was so drained.

That didn't keep the sight from being tormenting to watch. Wails and whimpers tore out of the wolf as she thrashed and struggled through the pain of her body bending and breaking into place. Her shoulders popped in and out of their sockets several times and her ribcage broke itself into a smaller frame. The long snout snapped and cracked and shrunk.

Running her hands through her hair and then agitatedly rubbing her face, Belle wished there was more she could do to help the wolf.

"Dammit, I should have administered a higher dose of painkillers." Dr. Hopper muttered, probably more to himself than to anyone else.

It felt like hours before the struggling form before them finally finished shrinking into a trembling woman chained to the floor. The silver-lined collar and cuffs still burned into her neck and wrists and Belle wished they'd just remove it.

What Belle did instead was walk over to 204, crouch down next to her and pull off the muzzle now loosely strapped to her face. From this close proximity, Belle could see the deep red scar that ran from the bridge of her nose, through her cheekbone and down to her jaw.

Tired green eyes looked up at Belle and it seemed that 204 was still trying to focus her vision. When she finally seemed to be able to take in Belle's appearance, a confused expression came over 204's face. Her brow was furrowed and her lips parted slightly.

"It's okay." Belle felt like the words were hollow and meaningless, tumbling out of her mouth by force of habit than anything else. She put the muzzle down and slowly reached a hand over to the woman's face.

Subject 204 immediately flinched the moment she saw the hand coming close. Her eyes were screwed shut, her jaw clenched and her shoulders bunched up close to her ears. She was trying to make herself as small as possible, bring her hands and knees as close to her body as the chains would allow.

Belle hesitated, not sure if she should carry on trying to touch 204 when she seemed so frightened.

"I'm not going to hurt you." Speaking as softly as she could, Belle waited for 204 to slowly open her eyes and meet Belle's. "I won't, I promise." She tried again at moving a hand towards 204 and though she was still clearly very tense, she didn't flinch away.

Belle ran her fingers through 204's shorn hair, maintaining a light touch at first, just enough for 204 to start to feel accustomed to the sensation. When she started to relax a bit more, Belle widened the area she was stroking, at first from forehead to the top of 204's head, then eventually including nosebridge until behind the ears, careful to avoid the new scar.

204's face was more relaxed now and she was closing her eyes as Belle continued to stroke her face and hair.

Glancing over at Dr. Hopper, Dr. Whale and the assistants, Belle saw that Dr. Whale was eyeing her suspiciously and looked away the moment he realized Belle had noticed. Dr. Hopper was taking another bloodtest from 204's thin arm and Belle couldn't help but notice several burns along her upper arm and shoulder. It was different when majority of the wounds were covered in fur.

Now, Belle couldn't help but look over 204's body and stare at every scar, every bruise, every burn. The worst burns were along her shoulders, but there were some nasty ones on the sides of her thighs as well. They seemed to be starting to heal, since they admittedly looked like an improvement from earlier when they were on the wolf. It was just unnerving to see how bad the burns really were against bare skin.

Consciously avoiding letting her eyes dwell on 204's breasts, Belle did find herself looking at the bullet scars on her ribs. And that's when Belle noticed that pale lines riddled 204's limbs, some areas darker and deeper than others, some very pale and almost white. Though Belle hoped those weren't scars from the silver and blade tests, she _knew_ they were.

Belle paused in stroking 204 to continue the fight to maintain composure. There was a heavy lump in Belle's throat and a tangled knot in her stomach. She also realized her hands were trembling and unsteady the moment she stopped focusing them on gently stroking 204.

It tore at Belle not knowing 204's real name. It tore at Belle seeing 204 so broken. It tore at Belle seeing the chains and the scars.

Feeling her eyes starting to water, Belle pinched the bridge of her nose and slid her fingers down to the corners of her eyes. The lump in her throat was fighting hard now to come out as a sob and she had to breathe deeply to steady herself and keep it from coming out.

A hand on her other wrist caught Belle's attention and she saw that 204 was trying to reach over. Belle clenched her jaw and swallowed back the urge to break down here in the middle of everything. She moved her hand closer to 204 so she could more comfortably grasp Belle's hand.

She couldn't help but notice how rough 204's palms were and a subtle glance at her hand told Belle that the rough skin was riddled with scars. Belle wasn't sure if it was some other test run by the scientists or self-inflicted with 204's own claws. It was impossible to decide on which thought was more painful to think about.

"I'm sorry…" Belle couldn't stop the useless apology that choked out of her.

204 opened her eyes and looked up at Belle. The expression in those deep green eyes was tired and defeated, almost like she was resigned to her fate. She was the one who offered a small, stiff smile to Belle, almost like smiling was something 204 barely knew how to do, and almost like _she_ was the one comforting _Belle_.

Part of that small offer of comfort was 204 gently squeezing Belle's hand.

Belle bit her lip to keep it from trembling. She felt the tension in her forehead as she realized how much she'd been furrowing her brows.

Not sure what else to do with herself, Belle used her free hand to start stroking 204's head and face again, and she seemed to lean into it now, closing her eyes and starting to relax.

A part of Belle wanted nothing more than to take this poor person away from here and give her love and kindness and warmth. _Most_ of Belle wanted to do that. _All_ of Belle wanted to do that.

She took a deep breath and slowly let it out, using the motion of it to try and steady herself.

Continuing to stroke 204, Belle looked around at the rest of the team. Dr. Whale had left the room, but Dr. Hopper was still taking some notes and running some tests. The other assistants hovered nearby, awaiting instructions. The guards were also standing at attention. The head guard, Gaston, seemed just barely able to hide his disgust. Meanwhile, the sympathetic guard, Li, kept her face guardedly neutral.

But Belle had a feeling Li was also feeling tormented by this situation.

204 seemed to be starting to fall asleep. Her breathing was slowing and her grip on Belle's hand was starting to loosen.

At least she could finally get some rest after such a long night.

Belle herself felt drained, but she doubted she'd be able to sleep once she got home. She wondered how she could ever sleep comfortably again, knowing someone was a tortured captive in this facility.

At this point, Belle no longer had any doubts that there may come a time that Regina and Emma would be facing a similar fate of dark and painful captivity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gosh, this chapter was a lot harder to write than the rest of the story up to this point. It took me several days and versions to work it up to the impact I wanted it to have and even then, I feel like I still could have tinkered with more things. Also, you have my buddy, Wolfie, to thank for some bits and pieces of Gold's training session with the wolf.
> 
> So how did you find this chapter? What hit your feels the most and what do you think is in store for everyone now that Belle's shaken off her delusions of any good being there to be found in Dr. Gold? Tell me what you think because me is an insecure attention cow.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo... This chapter has some flashbacks that reveal more about the events that lead up to Ruby's confinement. And also we'll be getting the aftermath of last night. TW: for some blood and stuff.

Sunlight was warming up her eyelids and she tried to cover her face and roll into a more comfortable position with her head under the pillow so she could catch five more minutes of sleep.

That's when it hit her.

This wasn't her bed, it was rough, hard floor.

The smell of blood hit her nostrils and she shot upwards, eyes opening up to the grizzly sight before her.

Blood.

Blood everywhere.

It covered the floor and the walls and the still, mangled form before her. There was blood and dirt all over her own hands and the stickiness on her face told her she was coated in it and the smell was nauseating and she felt her stomach lurch as she tried to fight back the urge to vomit.

This couldn't be right. This was a nightmare. This wasn't real.

With trembling hands, she reached for the mangled form, forcing herself to pick up one of the strips of cloth.

This wasn't real.

Her breathing was coming in fast and short and she wasn't getting enough air and she felt lightheaded and terrified.

This wasn't real.

She brought the strips of fabric closer to her face and turned it over. It was soaked in blood and gore, but as she clawed some of that off, she immediately dropped it.

This was real.

Her stomach contracted into itself and she lurched forward onto all fours, retching out bile and… and half-digested chunks of meat. There was hair and fabric mixed into the mess working its way out of her stomach.

This was Peter's jersey.

That… that… those remains… That _couldn't_ be Peter.

She wretched again, throwing up more meat and hair and cloth and indistinguishable mush. Eventually, she was just dry heaving.

Her throat felt raw and scratchy and sour and this _COULD NOT_ be real.

Wiping at her grimy face with grimy hands, she tried to wipe away her tears but only felt the filth and blood further spread over her skin. The smell was awful.

She retched again and clear liquid and air were all that worked out of her.

This wasn't real.

She needed to wake up.

She couldn't breathe. Her chest was tightening up like a heavy weight was pressing over her and constricting and she clawed at her skin to get the feeling off and she pulled at her hair and curled into a ball and prayed for the feeling to pass.

It felt like forever, struggling to breathe, struggling to push away the fog and heaviness and turmoil and she thought she was going to die, here and now, next to the carcass… next to _Peter's_ carcass.

The feeling in her chest was getting tighter and tighter. Her heart was pounding against her shrinking ribs and trying to get out and she thought her ribs were just going to shrink into her heart and lungs until she just couldn't breathe anymore and couldn't live anymore and it was terrifying and overwhelming and she felt like she was going to die.

She was going to die.

She couldn't breathe.

No matter how much she sucked air in, it was like it just got stuck in her throat and never reached her lungs. They felt like they were caving in and she was going to die.

She was going to die.

She was going to die. She was having a heart attack or some other attack that was going to leave her dead in this alley with blood and gore all over her skin and hair.

Curled up into a ball, she felt aware of how naked she was, with just some rags clinging to her limbs and shoulders.

She was going to be found here, naked and dead. A corpse next to the mangled remains of her boyfriend.

Her head hurt and her chest hurt and her hands were trembling and her body was trembling and she couldn't steady herself and the world was spinning and she just couldn't breathe.

She could feel her heart pounding in her ears.

How much longer before she finally died?

It felt like hours and days and weeks before the feeling finally started to ease. The tightness in her chest started to loosen its grip and she felt like she was finally starting to breathe air back into her starved lungs. The bitterness in her mouth made her feel like throwing up again but she fought back the lurch in her stomach.

Eventually, she found herself just feeling drained and empty.

A nagging voice in the back of her mind told her she should call Mother. Nobody else would be willing to pick up a naked, filthy teenager covered in blood and bring them home.

Should she call the police though?

A glance at Peter's remains and a flash of the feel of sinking teeth into him twisted her stomach into knots and knots and knots.

Fumbling and trying to gain a better grasp of her surroundings, she noticed her bag lying further along the alleyway. With how drained she suddenly felt and with how shaky and unsteady her limbs were, she had to practically drag herself to her bag, stumbling and falling and scraping her skin against the rough floor.

The straps of the bag were tattered, and there was some blood spread over it, but it was otherwise intact.

She fumbled with the zipper, constantly losing hold of it and cursing to herself.

Finally, she was able to open her bag and pull out her phone. Her stomach was flipping and she couldn't fight how hard her body was trembling. The simple act of turning her phone on and finding Mother in the contacts tab shouldn't have been this hard, but it was. She kept missing and accidentally pressing the wrong buttons and several times even dropped the phone.

When she finally managed to call Mother, it sank in that explaining the situation was going to be impossible.

The trembling grew more frenzied and she found herself starting to struggle with breathing again.

There were just two rings before Mother's voice finally came over the speaker. "Where are you?"

"I… I'm not sure." She wracked her brain and struggled to make sense of where she was depite the difficulty breathing and the lightheadedness and the chattering of her teeth and the darkness inching along the edges of her vision. "We… we met up…" She grit her teeth and tried to steady her breathing before continuing to speak. "…at the Storybrooke Park and… and… I think I'm in one of the alleys nearby. I… I don't know where I am."

"Wait there."

"Please…" She winced, hating how this was going to sound, "Please bring…"

"I'll bring clothes." Mother interrupted. "Just stay there."

* * *

Something was touching her hair.

Or rather, _someone_ was touching her _head_.

And it felt nice.

Soft, gentle fingers were smoothing circles into her temples and forehead and head. The touch was calming, she found herself letting out a sigh of contentment.

Eyelids fluttering open, she waited for her vision to clear, eventually focusing on a girl standing over the subject's head.

The girl seemed to be deep in thought, her own blue eyes looking far away, her brow furrowed. She was chewing on her bottom lip and looking troubled.

Memories of the night before were vague and hazy, but she thought she could recall this girl being one of the scientists from last night, and she might have been doing this same stroking-massaging thing then too. She had been nice.

Was she new?

Was she part of a test?

She must be part of some kind of test.

The subject was a monster and she didn't deserve this kind of kindness. She didn't deserve this kind of contact.

Aggressive beeping reached her ears, coinciding with her heartbeat speeding up. She tried to sit up and move away because she knew she was too dangerous to be this close to this girl.

Instead, she found herself unable to get up. She had been strapped down to the bed under her. Aside from the usual metal cuffs and collar that were just customary now, there were thick straps around her shoulders, waist, thighs and ankles. The straps were leather of some sort, not silver. If she could just strain them enough, she could get away and be as far away from this girl as possible.

Test or not, this girl was being too nice and the subject deserved none of this niceness.

The beeping was getting louder and more rapid. Her heart was hammering at her chest. She squirmed and struggled in the restraints.

"It's okay, it's okay." The girl was trying to stroke the subject's head again and her words were getting panicked. "204, please, try to calm down, please."

A growl reverberated in her throat and she tried to move her head away, only to feel the burn of the silver lining her collar.

The door burst open and Dr. Hopper came rushing in, two assistants following in his heels. They went straight towards the subject and she felt her panic reach new heights. It was impossible to tell what time it was and the subject feared she would have no control of herself and only bring harm and danger to them.

Her breathing was rushing in and out of her in rapid gasps and she felt like she wasn't getting enough air. The bed rattled and shook as she tried to get away from them.

Something sharp pierced her forearm, followed by a freezing feeling crawling through her skin, up her shoulder, through her neck. Once it reached her head, it felt cold, and heavy and she felt her breathing get easier and her heartbeat slow.

"Belle," The scientist's voice sounded distant. She was having trouble remembering his name again. He was the red-haired one with the name that was something like bouncing or jumping. "I think you should get some rest. Go home, or sleep in the lounge."

Belle. That was the girl's name.

It sounded pretty.

Fog was creeping into the subject's head and she felt her eyelids grow heavy.

"But what about-" Belle's voice sounded muffled.

"We'll take it from here." The scientist's voice was even more distorted, and the words were getting hard to make out. "Belle, please leave."

The assistants were saying something, garbling numbers and data and the subject could no longer process what she was hearing. Her head felt too heavy, and sleep just sounded so inviting and her muscles felt relaxed and she just wanted to let the darkness consume her.

* * *

The coffee was bitter and disgusting, making her cringe with every sip. Still, she had very few options since there was no tea to be found in the pantry and the energy drinks in the refrigerator would probably only intensify her jitters.

There was a turmoil of thoughts inside her head and she didn't know where and how to start sorting everything out.

204 was not being treated humanely. That much was certain.

Would Emma and Regina be facing the same fate one day?

That was hard to say. They _did_ have Emma in their custody already, and there was probably little stopping them from running more invasive tests. They probably already had done several, given how Emma had been detained here for at least two years and had nobody from outside looking for her or worrying about her.

The thought of being so alone in this world pulled at Belle and she realized that Emma also deserved better than the treatment she was being given here. Someone who'd grown up alone and angry needed to be reminded that she wasn't alone.

And Regina?

She wasn't being detained here, but Emma seemed convinced that arrangement wasn't going to last. And if Tamara's theory was right that Regina's mother was only using Regina to get money from the facility, would any change ever come to that arrangement? Would Dr. Gold and the scientists here be interested enough in Regina to propose a new deal to keep her confined here 24/7? What if they were just maintaining this arrangement until Regina did something extraordinary enough for them to want to keep her longer?

Belle wracked her brains and tried to remember what date Regina had been checked into the facility and it either didn't sink into Belle's mind or it wasn't mentioned by Dr. Gold.

Still, assuming the subjects were numbered chronologically, then if Emma was 223, she was the most recently acquired subject. 204 was here since 2010, at around the age of fifteen. It was possible that Regina, who was 201, had been here much longer.

And who was Subject 115? Was she a lycanthrope, like 204? Belle had only seen a glimpse of her file when Dr. Whale dropped his box. The older woman with the deeply scarred arm. She would have been detained much earlier on. What did they do for her to stop healing and then hit total organ failure?

Thinking about it made Belle cringe again.

She wanted to do something. To help 204, Regina and Emma.

But what could she do?

The guard's voice echoed in Belle's head.

_We do what we can._

And what would that be? Just watch and hope for the best? Just be on standby to keep the other scientists from accidentally killing their valuable lab rat?

Belle felt her anger rising again and had to steady herself.

"You're here earlier than usual." Aurora's voice interrupted Belle's thoughts. "Mind if I join you?"

"I'm here _late_ , actually." Saying that made Belle feel more aware of the heaviness to her eyes and the fogginess in her head. It was tempting to pass out in the lounge, but Belle felt like she needed to get out of here for a few hours. There was a part of her that felt unclean being here, unwilling to be associated with what was being done to 204, Emma and Regina.

" _Late_?" Aurora took the seat across Belle. "Oh yeah, those are the clothes you had on from yesterday." And now Belle felt aware of how she was unwashed and still wearing these clothes after more than a full day. "But why?"

Right. Sharing that probably wasn't wise.

Belle wanted to tell Aurora everything, if not to get some advice on what to do next, then to at least unload all the heaviness. Warmth touched at Belle's tired eyes and she found herself starting to tear up again to the images of 204's bruised and scarred body. Each breath she took had made her ribs rise and fall and it hadn't been hard to count each bone.

They had been charitable enough to throw another gown over 204 once she was unconscious, then transported her to another room. It took some begging and convincing for Dr. Hopper to allow Belle to be the one assigned to watch over 204 while she slept and monitor for any drop or spike in her vitals.

The restraints bothered Belle and everything about last night bothered Belle.

What topped it all off was 204's panic upon waking up, and the need to sedate her and the abrupt dismissal from Dr. Hopper.

Seeing those green eyes fill with distress, seeing her starved, scarred body fighting against the restraints and trying to get free, seeing everytime 204 winced at every touch… Belle felt her heart breaking and her throat started tightening up again.

"Hey, are you alright?" Aurora reached over and placed a warm hand over Belle's. It was smooth and soft, different from 204's scarred palms. "What happened?"

"Dr. Gold had me join the night shift on some tests and research." It wasn't a complete lie. It was actually pretty close to the truth. Just ridiculously vague. Belle swallowed and tried to compose herself enough to meet Aurora's eyes. "I'm just tired."

Concern was clear on Aurora's face. "Yeah, you should get home and rest. Will you be okay to drive? Or should I call you an Uber?"

Belle shook her head, "I think I'll manage." Then, deciding to change the subject, she added, "You're here early though. Our usual schedule isn't until like two hours from now."

Aurora shrugged. "I can't sleep, I guess."

"Wait, you mean your insomnia is still a problem until now?"

This time, Aurora was the one who looked uncomfortable. "Well… sort of." She was hesitating for a moment, looking troubled and trying to choose her words. "Sometimes, I just have trouble sleeping. Sometimes when I sleep, I have nightmares. Sometimes, it's sleep paralysis. Sometimes, I sleep, and I wake up to dreams in other places. And it feels like I'm far away from home. Then it gets so hard to actually wake up."

Aurora shrugged and fidgeted. "And sometimes, I'm just kind of too scared of feeling the things I feel when I sleep that I prefer not to sleep."

"That's…" Belle hadn't expected the conversation to take this turn and she felt like any other day, she would be completely fascinated by this. But she was tired and drained and the coffee was terrible. "… _interesting_."

"My thesis was actually focused on dreams, sleep disorders and the supernatural." Aurora toyed with her thermos before taking a sip from it. "I found some common themes and it was interesting enough for Dr. Gold to take notice and accept me into the program."

"So have you experienced anything supernatural?" Belle asked, propping her elbow on the table and leaning into her cheek. "Like when you sleep?"

Aurora fidgeted again and seemed uncomfortable.

Before she could answer though, Dr. Gold came into the pantry and walked straight over to them. "Aurora, dearie, if you'll excuse us," Dr. Gold looked at Belle. "I need to have a word with Belle."

Any semblance of a crush Belle might have had on Dr. Gold was gone now. The sight of him made her sick because all she could associate with him now was the cruelty with which he beat and cut and shocked the wolf. The cruelty with which he abused 204.

"Let's speak in my office," Dr. Gold's eyes pierced into Belle and for a moment she was afraid he was on to the change in her view of him. "Belle?"

The fact remained that he was still her boss. She stood up. "Yes, sir."

* * *

Headaches were hitting her again. They came in waves and varied in intensity.

She was draped over the chair and felt too stunned to process anything. Vague images and memories from last night kept trying to overwhelm her but she didn't feel like she could take any of them in. She blocked them out as best she could.

The numbness was a welcoming change from the distress and fear and grief that had enveloped her a few hours ago.

It took a while before she realized her name was being called and Mother was standing over her.

"Listen carefully."

She did her best to focus.

"I was supposed to ease you into this differently." Mother said. "I was waiting for you to mature a bit more and dump that _boy_."

There was still spite with how she spoke of Peter and the pain was blasted through her anew.

"Now we have to deal with what we have."

There were so many thoughts running through her mind and she felt so unsteady, but she forced herself to look at Mother and listen to her.

"It's too dangerous now to go back to the site to clean it up. Your grandmother tried that and it did not end well for her." Memories of Granny crashed over her and she tried to maintain her focus on Mother despite the images of hugs and pancakes and baking and playing dress up.

"Did Granny really…" she couldn't finish the sentence.

Mother ignored the question and kept going. "The best we can do is wait it out and act like nothing happened. It smells like it's going to rain, so the weather may be on our side. There are stray dogs in that area as well, so they might be able to finish some of the remains."

Peter's remains.

"I'm going to need you to get ready and go to school today." Mother continued. "You have to act normal. Maybe worried the boy is absent from class. But don't let anyone know what you know. Unless you want to meet the same fate as your grandmother, _you will do as I say_."

Still numb, still confused, still overwhelmed, she could only nod.

"The moon will still be full tonight, so I don't want you pulling the same shit you did last night. You come straight home after class. Do you understand?"

"Am I going to… to hurt anyone again?" Her voice felt rough as the words clawed their way out of her throat. The taste of bile and blood was still in her mouth no matter how much she gargled or drank water.

"It's in our nature to do so." Mother said. "But the responsible ones among us, know how to control it. And I'm going to need you to get through today and keep yourself controlled."

She nodded again.

"Now get ready for school. I'll drive you."

* * *

Stepping into Dr. Gold's office filled Belle with a strange sense of dread and disgust. Everything about it from the wooden fairy figurine to the crystal bluebird to the sculptured silver wolf made her want to throw a tantrum and send things flying and shattering.

Belle was tired, yes. But she knew this wasn't the average cranky tiredness. This was a deeper, more consuming kind of anger and she doubted it would ever go away.

"Belle, dearie." Dr. Gold settled into his chair and gestured for her to sit down. As tempting as it was to refuse, she doubted she could stay standing for very long, with how lightheaded she already was. "I must apologize for some of the events last night."

"Sir?" She hadn't expected that.

Still, how could any stupid apology take back what was done to 204 last night? That was cruel and inhumane and abusive and unless Dr. Gold had snapped to his senses and resolved to treat 204, Regina and Emma with more kindness and humanity, grant them more freedom and just leave them the hell alone, Belle doubted any apology would ever suffice.

"I had behaved unprofessionally." Dr. Gold said, "Which is not how this operation should ever be conducted."

_Unprofessionally?_

Unprofessional was cracking an NSFW joke while the boss is right behind you. Unprofessional was talking about your relationship at work. Unprofessional was forgetting to do your work or coming to work late or skipping work or calling in sick when you're not actually sick.

Torturing a subject close to collapse was not just unprofessional.

"One must never let emotions like anger and overexcitement affect work like this." Dr. Gold continued. "And one must never get so hyperfocused and fixated on the test and fail to doublecheck on the subjects vitals and readings."

Belle set her jaw, too livid to respond.

"On that note, I wanted to speak with you about any conceptions you may have about Subject 204." Dr. Gold leaned forward on his desk and clasped his hands together. "You seem to be feeling sympathetic towards her. Dr. Whale noticed some… _fondness_ and…" He pause a moment, choosing the right words. "… and _worry_ you exhibited towards her."

Pushing her hands deep into her pockets, Belle clenched her hands into fists.

"Dr. Hopper said you even insisted on being assigned to monitor 204 while she slept."

"What's wrong with that?" Belle had to keep her voice as even as she could.

Dr. Gold raised an eyebrow. "I think the problem here, dearie, is that you're confusing 204's human state with that of an actual human being."

The anger was rising up and Belle felt her hands starting to tremble.

"204 is, in fact, _not_ a human being. Her genetic makeup is different from ours. She is _scientifically_ not a human being. She can turn into a wolf. On top of that, she killed several people in her high school. In all intents and purposes, she is _not_ human."

Her stomach was starting to churn and twist and her shoulders were starting to tremble as well.

Dr. Gold seemed to decide to take her silence as agreement of some sort. "Understand that we have protocols in place and we prefer to prevent any staff from growing too attached to 204. It clouds judgments and affects test results. Can you follow what I'm getting at?"

There was a subtle threat there.

If Belle was caught showing too much attachment to 204, she would be pulled out of the project. Maybe even the internship program.

A lot of good that would do for 204, Emma and Regina.

Belle sighed and felt her shoulders sink. "I understand."

"Good." Dr. Gold nodded. "In fact, it is actually cause for concern that Dr. Hopper is so sympathetic towards the wolf. There was a time we were worried that he was possibly tampering with some of our tests and programs. We've reviewed security footage though and he does seem to follow orders. Especially when we spcifically asked him to stop feeding treats to 204."

Tensing up, Belle tried to keep her trembling from becoming too visible. She shifted in her seat and ran her fingers through her hair, for a moment feeling grossed out by how oily it had gotten after the long day and long night.

"Still, he is invaluable to this facility, particularly since he studied another subject, 115, very extensively and led the autopsy on her as well. He's also excellent at maintaining 204's health."

There it was again, that clinical, detached way of talking about 204 like she had no feelings or agency of any sort. Like she was less than an animal. 204 was an experiment to them and nothing more.

That scrawny, scarred up body was still burned into Belle's mind. Those terrified green eyes, the desperate struggles to get away… It made another lump develop in her throat.

"I understand." She did her best not to spit out the lie.

There was a knock on the door.

"Come in!" Dr. Gold said, and the door swung open. In walked Tamara and Belle felt a wave of distress washed over her.

Gesturing for Tamara to take a seat next to Belle, Dr. Gold continued on, "I appreciate the empathy that you, Belle, show towards the subjects and I see the use that could be with certain interactions with them. But we have to always remember to keep our distance. That's something that _Tamara_ is good at."

Dr. Gold then picked up several sheets of paper from his desk. Belle recognized the files as a copy of the ones she'd been given of 204. "Which is why, I want the two of you to start working together tonight."

"On what?" Tamara had an eyebrow raised and watched Belle suspiciously while reaching over to take the papers from Dr. Gold.

"If you're willing to take on this subject," Dr. Gold said, "You can have the day off to go over her file so you can be alert enough to be part of tonight's tests."

Tamara's brows slowly rose higher and higher as she skimmed through the file and her jaw dropped as she went through the pages. "Whoa." She looked over at Dr. Gold. " _Whoa_."

Dr. Gold was smirking now. "So are you interested in joining us tonight?"

"Definitely!" Tamara was grinning wider than Belle had ever seen her grin before. "I notice you have some notes about trying to control the wolf, could you tell me more about that?"

"They've been using electrical prods." Belle couldn't help the aggressive tone that leeched into her voice. She had to take a breath and regain composure before continuing in a calmer tone. "Some reward and punishment methods similar with classic animal training."

 _Classic_ was a carefully chosen word.

 _Dated_ and _inhumane_ and _cruel_ were probably the more appropriate words to use but Belle had to take Dr. Gold's warning seriously. It was hard to stay collected and try to be cooperative, but Belle had to remember she would be of no use to any of the subjects here if she was banned from ever coming back in.

"Isn't that a bit… _primitive_?" Tamara asked.

Dr. Gold's eyebrows shot up. "Excuse me?"

"You have a subject that can read minds and a subject that can move matter." Tamara waved her hands and shrugged like it was the most obvious solution. "Have you tried using them yet? To manipulate and control 204?"

Rubbing his chin, Dr. Gold seemed to be seriously considering the suggestion. A low chuckle came out of him. "That's a brilliant idea!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo. Tamara's going to be part of tonight's tests. That doesn't particularly sound like good news. Also, Belle's stressed af and needs a break. Ruby though SRSLY needs a break.
> 
> In other news, chapter twelve should be due to go up tomorrow. After that might be when the bigger gaps between chapters should start because thirteen isn't ready yet.
> 
> EITHER WAY I AM VERY EXCITED FOR CHAPTER TWELVE TOMORROW IT HAS SOME INTENSE SCENES.
> 
> But yeah, what do you think is going to happen next? Given some updates to the info you know about Ruby's backstory, how do you think she ended up in the facility? And WHAT WILL BELLE DO NEXT?! Also, I wonder about Aurora.. hmm...
> 
> SEE YOU TOMORROW HUMANS! (and don't forget to let me know what you think because your freaking out and theorizing and everything in between GIVE ME LIFE)


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You have two chapters today, and you have Konako and Wolfie to thank for that because I am weak. Actually, feel free to browse the comments for the meta discussions Konako and I have because lol it's fascinating (and sometimes bordering on spoilery?)
> 
> But also, everyone who left a comment and dumped their feels on me, thanks so much because you cuties are the reason I keep posting. BUT NOW THIS IS THE END OF MY BUFFER SO CHAPTER THIRTEEN MAY BE DELAYED.
> 
> But yeah. This chapter... well buckle up, kids.

This still was just a dream.

There was no way in hell that any of this was actually happening.

No.

Way.

She felt like she was in a daze. Her head, interspersed with headaches, was in a constant fog. Focusing on anything was difficult because all she wanted was to go home or run away or hide, or do all three somehow. Memories of last night were hazy and scattered and she wasn't sure if she wanted to remember or wanted to forget.

Her skin felt itchy and hot and she felt unclean despite the thorough bath she'd given herself. It was like the scent of the blood still clung to her hair and hands and she couldn't shake it off and she felt like everyone could smell it too and everyone was staring at her.

There was an urge to just claw at her skin and peel it away until the feeling of dirt and blood and monstrosity would go away.

The crowd of students chattering around her felt both far away, and just way way too near. It was like it was in her head- all the talking and screaming and laughing. It was pounding against her skull, hearing all the noise. But she also felt so detached from her body, it was almost like she was imagining everything and not feeling anything.

What was she even doing?

Looking in front of her, she remembered she was getting her books for her next class.

What even was her next class?

She wracked her brain for it but just couldn't remember.

But maybe she wrote it down somewhere?

Scrunching up her face and rubbing at her forehead and temples, she inwardly cursed at herself. She had to get a grip. She didn't want to just disappear like Granny and be known by everyone as a serial killer.

Or did she?

Disappearing sounded so good right about now.

But being known as a serial killer? She wasn't sure if she wanted that.

Although after what she'd done to Peter, she might as well be.

Images of his terrified face were filling her mind now. She could see him, backing away, saying something she couldn't understand. She could see him starting to run. See him reaching the dead end. See him pressed up against the wall. She could hear him. He was begging and pleading and… and saying her name.

A hand pressed against the locker in front of her and the feel of a body pushing up against her pulled her from her thoughts.

"Peter doesn't seem be around today." It was Keith, and he was leaning in far too close for comfort. She could smell whatever he'd been smoking, as well as his own natural scent. Which wasn't at all pleasant. "Did you scare him off with whatever you were doing together last night?"

Anger surged through her and before she could stop herself, she'd grabbed him by the throat, turned around and pinned him against the lockers. A loud bang echoed through the hall as the back of his head slammed against the metal.

Warmth was building up behind her eyes and her jaw felt stiff and out of place, like her teeth were becoming too big for her mouth.

"You do not get to talk about Peter." She felt her voice come out harsh and rough, more of a growl than a yell.

What was she doing?

Cold, oppressive silence filled the air. She turned to see that everyone in the hallway was staring at her.

Turning back to Keith, she saw the terror in his eyes. It reminded her too much of Peter's terror. They were all looking at her like she was a monster and she couldn't deny it- she _was_ a monster.

She released Keith and walked off as fast as she could.

 _History_.

Her next class was history.

She just needed to get herself through the day and then she could hide in the basement.

* * *

No matter how much she tossed and turned in bed after a nice hot shower, Belle just couldn't relax. She felt tense and wound up. Images of everything she'd seen so far and everything she imagined had already come to pass- they just kept playing and replaying in her mind. They filled her senses until she felt like 204 was right there. Restrained and thrashing and screaming and growling in that feral, terrified, _desperate_ way.

Groaning, Belle turned over and buried her face in her pillow.

The images just seemed all the more viivd. Those dark, sad eyes, shifting from gold to green and back. A frightened, whimpering wolf trying to avoid being put through pain. A bruised and battered girl subjected to invasive and unforgivable experiments already crossing over into flat out _torture_.

Anger boiled through Belle, and she realized she was trembling again. There was both heat and cold rushing through her insides. Sorrow and rage. Guilt and fear.

Teeth chattering, stomach churning, Belle groaned as she sat up and rubbed at her face.

She had to do something.

The big question though was _what_?

Groaning again, Belle gave up on sleeping and pulled herself out of bed. With unsteady feet and a head that felt so heavy it might just drop, she shuffled over to the kitchen and basically sprawled herself over the counter next to the electric kettle.

"Isn't it too early for you to be trying to have any tea or coffee?"

Belle jumped and awkwardly scrambled to turn around and see her father. " Papa, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at work at the shop?"

Papa raised an eyebrow and folded his arms across his chest. "And shouldn't you be catching up on sleep?" He eyed the kettle. "And _not_ trying to get high on caffeine?"

There wasn't much of a point in lying or coming up with an excuse. She just didn't necessarily have to give all the details just yet.

"I couldn't sleep." Belle sighed, flopping onto the nearest dining chair.

"You should." Papa followed suit and sat next to her. "I was worried about you and figured I'd leave Billy in charge so I could come check on you." He moved the chair closer and wrapped an arm around her. "You seemed so out of it when you came home. Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'm just…" Belle wrung her hands together. "I don't agree with some of their methods."

"I know this is really important to you," Papa rubbed small circles into her shoulder with his thumb. "But are you still sure you want to do this? Be part of this? I know how you get when things go against your values."

Belle bit her lip and wasn't sure how to answer.

"By the way, this night shift… thing." Papa said. "Is that going to be permanent?"

For a moment, frustration fired through Belle and she wanted to remind Papa that it was up to her if she wanted to take on a night shift or not. It was her decision and she had a right to make it.

But seeing the look of concern on his face told Belle that he was just being a worried father.

That, and Belle was just cranky and tired and overwhelmed.

"I don't think it will be for too long." Belle said, "The… subject we're observing right now is best observed at night." The full moon should last for about another night or two, Belle figured. Then maybe she would be back to her regular schedule. "It shouldn't be for too long though. I think I'll be back to the day shift next week at the latest."

This was assuming of course that Dr. Gold wouldn't be pulling her out of the program altogether, given the warning he gave about being too attached to 204.

There was nothing wrong with being a decent person and giving some basic decent humane treatment to another living being. Human or not, 204 did _not_ deserve the treatment she was getting and Belle wanted to change that somehow.

"What's on your mind?" Papa interrupted her thoughts.

It was so tempting to pour everything out and discuss everything she'd seen, but it was all _classified_.

That and Belle had a feeling that Papa was just going to tell her to reconsider her options and maybe look for another facility to apply to. There was always the Dyad Institute, after all.

"Just really stumped trying to figure out one of the subjects." Belle delivered a half-truth and it didn't quite feel right.

"Hey." Papa put his hands on Belle's face so they could focus on each others' eyes. "You're at home. You're not at work right now, you're at _home_. You're at home to take care of yourself and rest. You won't be able to get any work done tonight if you're not sharp and well-rested. Maybe read a _fictional_ book for a little bit to relax, then get some rest. Does that sound good?"

"Yes, Papa." Belle nodded, but deep down, she couldn't shake off the cold, hard truth of how _she_ could leave that awful place and go home, but Emma and 204 could not.

* * *

Being confined to the bed and not being able to move was making the subject restless. Her mind was wandering and trying to piece together events from the previous night, but she was also trying _not_ to remember any of it because she refused to share memories with the wolf.

She was a monster, and she wished she could forget that.

But she also knew she didn't deserve to forget she was a monster.

Her mind was a mess and her thoughts were scattered and running around all over the place. She couldn't decide on what she wanted- forget or remember. She couldn't decide on what she should do- fight the wolf or accept the wolf. She couldn't decide on what she wished- another brief moment with the nice girl or extreme distance from her because someone so nice didn't deserve close contact with a monster.

Monsters always kill the ones that care for them the most. The ones that are the most gentle and kind. The ones that don't deserve death or maiming or the sight of a ravenous beast running them down.

Memories of Peter's remains and the bloody alleyway came creeping into her mind again.

The machines were beeping aggressively again and her heartbeat was picking up again and she found herself struggliing again. Pain was pounding through her skull, squeezing it and cutting it and she felt like her head would explode or split open so the wolf could come out.

She grit her sharpening teeth and clenched her stiffening jaw and strained against the straps and cuffs and collar keeping her where she was.

"204," There was a voice, muffled and distant, but familiar. Female. "204, breathe. Just breathe like a I told you before."

Opening eyes she hadn't realized she'd closed, the subject looked up to see Mulan standing over her bed. Breathing was difficult and no matter how hard she sucked air into her lungs, it was never enough and her head was splitting open and her lungs were on fire and she strained harder to get free and get away before she hurt the one guard who showed kindness she didn't deserve.

"Breathe, breathe." Mulan had grasped the subject's scarred hands now and was squeezing. The contact helped ground the subject and she forced herself to focus on Mulan's dark eyes. "Breathe with me, okay?"

"In…"

The subject breathed in as deeply and as slowly as she could.

"Out…"

She exhaled alongside Mulan.

"In…"

The headache was starting to fade as they inhaled together.

"Out…"

And they exhaled together.

The subject followed along with Mulan's instructions, breathing with her until the beeping machines slowed down and her own heartbeat relaxed and her lungs stopped burning up and her head stopped splitting apart.

"There we go." Mulan's smile was warm and relieved, but the subject noticed there was pity in her eyes as well. "That's better, isn't it?"

She nodded.

Just then, the door swung open and Mulan immediately let go of the subject's hand and stood at attention.

In strolled Dr. Gold and another girl that the subject didn't recognize. Given, she had difficulty recognizing most of the scientists and assistants, but the subject could have sworn the girl had never been here before.

The look of awe with which she was staring at the subject did hint that the girl was new.

"I heard the monitors go off." Dr. Gold said, looking straight at Mulan.

There was tension in Mulan that the subject sensed was unease. "Yes, sir."

"Why didn't you call for Hopper or the assistants?" Dr. Gold's voice was deceptively light, but even the subject felt the warning in the words.

Mulan kept her face neutral and her voice even. "The subject relaxed before I could radio for backup, sir."

Dr. Gold came closer to stand over the subject's bed. "Very well. You may resume your position at the corner. And while you're at it, think over the strict protocols and SOP's we've put in place."

"Yes, sir." Mulan stiffly walked over to her post at the corner of the room.

"Well, dearie." Dr. Gold had his attention on the subject now. She flinched as his hand came over to her face. The expected roughness didn't come, and instead he rubbed at her close-cropped hair like she was a fond pet.

She _was_ a fond pet.

"Did you have a good rest?"

She nodded, then looked over at the new girl.

Following her gaze, Dr. Gold continued to stroke the subject's head. "That, dearie, is Tamara. She's another new intern who will be working on running some tests later. I think you'll find tonight's tests very interesting, dearie."

Interesting always meant something very new. And new things were always painful or frightening or both.

The monitors started to beep again, but she forced herself to calm down and relax. She took a deep breath, made eye contact with Mulan, then let it out slowly. The beeping slowed to its regular, even pace.

"You said she has accelerated healing." Tamara moved closer until she was at Dr. Gold's shoulder, looking down at the subject.

They were both looking down at her and though the feeling should be familiar by now, there was something about it now that felt uneasy. It was like how Dr. Hopper and some of the assistants looking down at her was okay, but when it was Dr. Whale and Dr. Gold, it felt nerve-wracking.

"Indeed, she does." Dr. Gold pulled a tray closer to the bed and the subject felt her heartbeat picking up again when he lifted a scalpel from the tray. "Watch this."

She clenched her hands into fists and breathed through her nose, already bracing for what was to come.

The scalpel came closer and closer to her arm and she couldn't move it away. This should be a familiar feeling by now, especially after the extensive tests they had taken to record how fast she could heal for different blades. She should be used to this by now. She shouldn't be feeling this distressed. Again.

She stifled a whimper as the blade broke her skin and blood seeped out. Dr. Gold brought the scalpel from left to right, across her forearm, then lifted the blade.

A warm, burning feeling collected around the wound, and it stung as she felt the skin stitching itself back together. The muscle along that arm felt stiff and sore once the cut was closed.

Dr. Gold took out a rag and wiped away the blood to show the new, uncut skin. "Impressive, isn't it?"

"It is." Tamara's smirk made the subject uneasy.

"Would you like to give it a go?"

Her heart skipped a beat as Dr. Gold said those words.

The gleam in Tamara's eyes was unnerving.

As the blade was transferred into Tamara's hands, the subject started struggling and squirming, pulling against the cuffs keeping her wrists still and the straps keeping her shoulders and waist down. The monitors were beeping aggressively.

For a moment, the subject made eye contact with Mulan and the guard's stoic mask had broken into a look of distress.

" _204_!" Dr. Gold's tone was snappy and scolding as he placed his hands on her forehead and shoved her head back down against the bed. "Be still."

Gritting her teeth and breathing heavily through her nose, the subject forced her tense muscles to relax. She glanced again at Mulan, who had rearranged her features back into their neutral expression. The subject looked up at Dr. Gold, wishing for the words to question what the purpose of this could be. Wishing for an explanation on how this girl could make a difference on the subject's disease.

"You can heal rapidly anyway." Dr. Gold was using that reprimanding, condescending tone again. "So be still and let Tamara test your healing abilities."

The subject resisted the urge to jerk her head away from Dr. Gold's hands and instead closed her eyes and waited.

At first, there was nothing.

She focused on her breathing, like Mulan had said.

In…

Hold it…

Out.

In…

Hold it…

Out.

The sharpness pierced her skin and sliced through until her elbow. Her hands were clenched into firsts and she felt blood welling up from her palms again. Claws were digging in instead of nails, again. Warmth was building up behind her eyes, again.

Fight it.

She had to fight it.

Her breathing was getting rapid again. The heat was collecting all along her arm. There was that familiar burning feeling as the skin started closing over the wound and repairing itself all along the layers of skin.

Then she felt gloved fingers pressing against the wound, trying to keep it open, spreading the skin apart.

The subject bit back the high-pitched whine collecting in her throat. She felt the burning feeling of the healing fight against the pressure being used to keep the wound open. It was excruciating, feeling the contrasting push and pull of the external pressure keeping the wound open and the internal stitching her body was trying to do.

It was getting difficult to breathe evenly and she felt the panic rising up.

She focused on trying to calm herself.

Breathe in…

Hold it.

Breathe out slowly…

Cursed healing abilities won out and finally managed to stitch the skin together and close the wound completely.

She opened her eyes to Tamara wiping off the blood on the subject's skin and looking alarmingly excited and fascinated. That look was familiar to the subject. Dr. Gold got it very often, and it was very prevalent when she first came to be here.

The distant memory came back to her, of being strapped down in this similar, familiar position as Dr. Gold stood over her and told her about the monstrous things she'd done to her classmates and Mr. Spencer. Of the cold look on Mother's face as she watched through the glass.

Digging her claws deeper into her palms, the subject forced herself back into the present and saw that Dr. Gold had now brought out a _very_ familiar knife. The beeping machines filled her ears as her own rapidly beating heart desperately tried to escape her chest and be free of this cursed body.

"Come now, dearie." Dr. Gold brought the blade close to her face, where she knew he'd already left a scar from last night. Out of all the vague memories from last night, that one stuck out clearly. "Tell you what,"

With the knife still frighteningly close to the subject's face, Dr. Gold leaned over, using his free hand to rub at her head again, like she was a pet, again. "Let's just make it a small cut. Just to show Tamara the difference between silver and a regular blade. Yes?"

This Tamara was new and needed to be briefed on the monstrous abilities the subject was capable of. That must be the reason for this. Maybe she was an expert of some sort who could be key to finding a cure. She needed as much information as possible to come up with the best possible program that would fix the subject.

Still with her heart beating rapidly and air rushing in and out of her nose and her jaw clenched so tight, the muscles were cramping up, the subject gave a small nod.

Dr. Gold moved the blade away and then rolled up the subject's left sleeve to reveal more of her shoulder. There was scarring and discoloration from the electrical burns.

She braced herself for the silver burn.

A groan forced its way through her grit teeth the moment the blade touched and burned into her skin. It was hot and burning and piercing and she felt her eyes warming up and her teeth sharpening and she had to fight it.

FIGHT.

IT.

She focused on Mulan, whose mask had broken again. The gloved hands at her sides were tightly clenched and the distress in her dark eyes was piercing.

Grounding herself in the guard's eyes, taking in every detail of her face, of her short hair up in a bun... it helped keep the subject from losing what little was left of herself. The warmth faded from the subject's eyes. She didn't need a mirror to know they faded from yellow to green again. There was no longer a pushing and pulling feeling in her teeth.

Agony- hot and burning- still centered around the cut on her shoulder despite the blade no longer slicing into her skin. Though the threat of the shift was gone, the silver burn had yet to release its hold.

Breathing through the pain, she continued to looked at Mulan. Focused on the guard doing her best to stay neutral and expressionless and more a background prop than a person with something to say about this.

"It's not healing as fast." Tamara noted with interest, then rifled through some papers. "How pure is the silver in that blade?"

Dr. Gold was wiping his knife now. "The purest. Had it custom made for this."

"Given that the cut is very small, and the tonight being the full moon, it will take…" Tamara studied her notes. "Roughly an hour for a cut that small to heal. Right?"

Looking away from Mulan, the subject leaned her head back and looked up at the two scientists.

"Correct." Dr. Gold nodded.

The scorching pain was making her dizzy. Her skin was struggling to repair itself but the burn from the silver was keeping the wound open and she could feel her blood weaving down the side of her shoulder and on to the bed.

"Dr. Gold, is she always so…" Tamara seemed to be searching for the right word. "…mute?"

"She used to be very vocal." Dr. Gold moved his hand back towards her face and she tried to flinch away but the collar kept her head from moving far and he pressed his palm against her forehead. "Weren't you?"

She swallowed and looked at him, wishing he could let her go so she could curl up into a ball and wait for the cut to heal.

Dr. Gold looked away from the subject and returned his focus to Tamara. "She's spoken very few words since entering this facility though. And even less when the tests began. And now… she's just… like that."

"Interesting…" Tamara was still staring at the cut on the subject's shoulder.

"To be honest," Dr. Gold said. " I prefer it. I tire sometimes of 201, and _especially_ 223."

"Hah!" Tamara made a sound somewhere between scoff and laugh. "I can imagine."

"Now let's proceed to my office where you can tell me more about your ideas for tonight's tests." Dr. Gold led the way to the door. "We can check in on 204 later to see if the cut has healed."

They were finally leaving.

Without really thinking about it, the subject relaxed. So many of her muscles had been tensed up and it was a pure release to finally just lie back against the bed, now damp from the sweat she'd broken from the demonstration.

Tamara was starting to remove her gloves and the subject closed her eyes, wanting nothing more than to sleep and dream of being somewhere else or some _when_ else.

Agony shot through her already burning shoulder.

Eyes snapping open, she yelped and tried to squirm away but the straps and cuffs held fast.

"Fascinating!" Tamara was leaning close and pushing the skin apart after it had already started moving closer to bridging the gap.

The subject groaned and breathed through the renewed pain as Tamara finished pulling off her last glove and followed after Dr. Gold.

* * *

It took a while, but Belle had finally managed to get herself to sleep, only to wake up groggy and irritable. The distress and disgust from the night before came crashing back down and she didn't know if she wanted to break down and cry or throw up her hands and yell obscenities in anger.

Crawling out of bed was crap. Getting dressed and ready was crap. Driving to the torture chamber disguised as a scientific facility was crap. Parking her car was crap.

Everything was crap.

No, everything was _shit_.

She rolled the word around in her mind and considered saying it out loud.

"Shit."

The word stumbled out of her- softly and awkwardly. She tried again.

"Everything is SHIT."

Releasing it in such a childish, absurd way in her car in the parking lot felt pretty damn good. She sucked in a breath and screamed it out this time.

" _SHIIIIIIIT_!"

Belle was in the middle of getting ready to scream it one more time when she noticed a familiar guard walking by, towards the end of the lot.

It was the guard that Emma had singled out and whose mind Belle had been shoved in to for a moment. The same guard that looked tormented by the treatment the wolf was given.

She was in a leather jacket now, and a plain T-shirt, but the pants and boots from the standard uniform were still there.

"Wait"! Hurriedly shutting the engine and scrambling out of her car, Belle went after the guard. "Ms. Li!"

The guard stiffened and turned.

Praising the almighty for letting her be too drained to wear anything with heels today, Belle jogged over to catch up to the guard, who was now eyeing her suspiciously, arms folded across her chest.

"Can I talk to you?" Belle asked.

"You're kind of doing that now, aren't you?"

Right.

Belle bit her lip and rifled through her mind for the possible things to say to move the conversation along. "Uh… can I have your name?"

The guard's eyes narrowed. "Why?"

"Uh…" Belle was too tired to come up with a polite answer and found herself saying, "So I know what to call you?"

"Fine. It's Mulan. Not to be rude, but... now what?"

This was not going well at all. Belle ran her hands through her hair and clasped her hands behind her back. "Okaaay. Well." She let her hands drop, then after a moment, extended one for a handshake. "I'm Belle."

Mulan just eyed Belle's extended hand, then shifted from one foot to the other. "Look, I've been having a nasty day and I have to get going. Can you just cut to the chase? What do you want?"

To be perfectly honest, Belle didn't really know what she wanted. She hadn't quite figured out yet what she wanted to do.

She just knew that she refused to just stand by and watch these scientists torture living beings in the name of research. There were lines that shouldn't be crossed, and they had practically bulldozed through those lines.

But really, what did she want and what was she going to do?

On top of that, was there really a tactful way of saying ' _Hi, I was kind of pushed into your head by Emma Swan yesterday so I know you feel bad about 204, would you maybe be willing to help me figure out how best to improve her situation?_ '

That would just be a disaster.

Mulan was looking more uncomfortable now, glancing left and right.

"You don't like it, do you?" Belle threw caution to the wind and decided she might as well be as direct as she could be. "The way they treat 204?"

"I'm not paid to like what I see." Mulan answered.

"Still, the fact is it doesn't sit well with you," Belle took a step forward. "Just like it doesn't sit well with me."

Mulan's discomfort was getting apparent as she looked around the lot and rubbed at the back of her neck. "I can't talk about this, okay?"

"Please, can we just-"

Waving a hand to cut her off, Mulan stepped forward and put a hand in her pocket. For a fleeting moment, Belle was afraid that the guard was going to draw a weapon. Instead, she pulled out her phone and handed it to Belle. "Here, just give me your number and we can talk where there won't be anyone watching. Honestly, I would really rather not end the day being fired, okay?"

Belle nodded, tapping her number into the phone and returning it to Mulan.

"Thanks." Mulan turned to start walking away. "I'll text you."

That didn't go as badly as it could have gone. Belle figured she could give herself credit for that. She turned and started heading for the main entrance.

Just as she was signing in, a text came through to her phone.

"I just had to stand and watch them cut her open like a frog. Of course I don't like how they treat her. But she's under tight security and thorough surveillance. I could lose my job if they knew the stupid little things I try to do for her. You could lose yours too, if they found out how emotionally invested you are in her. What good would we be to her if we lost access to her?"

Seeing the text brought another rush of mixed emotions coursing through Belle.

They definitely would be of no help to 204 if they were stripped of their access to her.

If only -and entertaining the thought was highly absurd- the _whole facility_ was what was stripped of its access to 204.

* * *

Everything seemed surreal and absurd and pointless in the face of the fact that she was a monster.

She was a monster and she murdered her boyfriend.

They were supposed to run away together and be together and live happily ever after.

Instead she killed him.

She fidgeted in class, unable to sit still at all. Her leg jogged up and down, her foot tapped against the floor, her fingers rapped against her desk, her torso would even sometimes rock back and forth.

"Are you okay?"

That was Dorothy. She was carrying a concerned expression. "What happened? Did something happen? I thought you'd be with Peter last night."

The very sound of his name made her stomach lurch, and she had to swallow back the urge to throw up.

Her head was pounding and her eyes were burning up and she buried her face in her hands. She couldn't do this. She couldn't act normal. She couldn't pretend she didn't just murder the love of her life last night.

She tried to fight back the memories of attacking Peter.

She fought to find something else to latch on to.

Had Granny really been a monster?

When they would play doctor in the basement, Granny was there, in the beginning. She used to be part of it and she and Mother would argue about leaving. Leaving the basement? Leaving town?

It was hard to breathe.

She remembered Granny's yellow eyes. She remembered Granny telling her to go away. She remembered a big dog in the basement.

They didn't have any dogs.

Breathing was difficult.

She needed air.

She stood up abruptly and stuttered over an excuse. "C-can… I… I… I need to… Can I be excused?"

Mr. Spencer turned away from what he was writing on the board so he could look her up and down. "What did you just say?"

Eyes.

Eyes were all over her. They were staring at her.

They could see the blood she had been caked in this morning. She knew they could see it. She knew they knew what she had done. They knew she was a serial killer just like Granny. They knew she was a monster. They were all staring and they all knew and they all saw the evil in her eyes and the blood on her face and the grime on her clothes and the remains of Peter in her mouth.

"Wolfie." The nickname was stupid fun back when they first came up with it, but now, she felt like it was an accusation. A confirmation. A testament to the beast that she was. Dorothy was looking at her with concern. "Wolfie, are you okay?"

"Sit. Down." Mr. Spencer's voice was cold.

Everyone was staring.

She couldn't sit down.

She couldn't pretend.

None of this was okay.

None of this could be real.

She couldn't breathe.

"I need… I need to…" She clutched at her chest, clawed at her chest, tried to get rid of the restricting feeling that was tightening and tightening and keeping her from getting enough air. "I need… I… I have to… I can't."

"If you don't sit down this instant," Mr. Spencer was pointing at her, his eyes hard and unrelenting. "I will have you sent to the principal's office. Are we understood?"

Mr. Spencer was blurring in and out of focus. He was angry. She could feel it. He wanted her to sit down. She couldn't.

"I can't." She couldn't explain why. Mother wouldn't want her to explain why.

It was so hard to breathe. Her chest felt like it was shrinking. Her head was spinning. The world was spinning. It was too dark. It was too bright. There was too much noise. There were too many scents. There were too many faces. Too many eyes all focused on her. Too many that knew what she did.

"Wolfie?"

"DONT CALL ME THAT!" She snapped out the words and turned upon Dorothy and...

FIGHT IT.

She clutched at her hair and grit her teeth and struggled to breathe and wished she was in the basement where it was quiet and it was dark and there were no eyes all over her eyes watching her eyes judging her eyes knowing her eyes accusing her eyes wanting to kill her.

"Hey, hey," Dorothy was standing now and she moved in front of the monster. "What's going on?"

"Can't…" She closed her eyes, feeling heat building up behind them. It was burning and enveloping and she felt like her eyes were going to melt right out of their sockets. "Can't."

"Mr. Spencer," Dorothy was speaking, "We need to take her to the clinic."

Opening her eyes, she looked around desperately for an exit. For a place to hide. For the basement.

"She's just making a scene!" Mr. Spencer waved his hand. He continued to blur in and out of focus and even started to multiply. "Just get her to sit down so we can finish the lesson or you're _both_ going to be seeing me at detention tonight."

" _NO_!" Not tonight. Not at night. Mother needed her home tonight. She needed to be home tonight. She couldn't kill anyone again. She was a monster and she needed to be in the basement. She needed Mother to be the doctor in the basement again. "NO, I CAN'T"

Her eyes were burning up and her head was burning up and her hands were burning up and they all knew she was a monster and they all hated her and they all wanted Peter back and they all wanted her to go away and they all hated what she was and who she was and what she did and everything was burning and her head was going to burst and everything was going to burst and she was going to burst.

A roar tore out of her throat and she wanted nothing more than to get away from all the eyes. She wanted to get away from the hand on her shoulder. She wanted space. She swiped at the person in front of her, sending her flying across the room, she wanted to get to the door, but there was screaming. There was screaming in her ears and in her head and it hurt her ears and it hurt her head and she needed to make them all be quiet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry...
> 
> Um.. treat yourself to some chocolate and cuddles with your pet or roommate or lover. I'm not sure yet if I can post chapter 13 tomorrow or the day after. I think you guys could use a breather though. So yeah. the usual, I appreciate your thoughts and your feels.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. Lol in my notes I call this Chapter 13A because this isn't what I originally planned for Chapter 13. After yesterday's chapter, where I tore you all apart, I figured that today, you deserve a break. Like this chapter has like... a much much lighter tone than the previous ones? It's closer to the feel (and length) of the first chapter. Since we need to breathe for a bit.
> 
> Also, interestingly enough, I had to doublecheck and recall what were the in things at around 2008-2010. You'll see why. Also, trying to remember what it's like to feel and think like a teenager is tricky coz I have to remember how awkward and dorky af I used to be like seven to eight years ago. Also trigger warning for a very very subtle implied/mentioned suicide? It's not dwelled on or shown. Just.. hinted at.

They were watching the movie that every teenager girl has to watch at least a dozen times.

And she loved it. The first movie was great. The second movie was just as great. Maybe even better because…

"JACOB! HE'S THERE! HE'S THERE!" She felt her stomach flipping and she felt giddy as hell and couldn't help swatting at Dorothy's lap and pointing intensely as Taylor Lautner came charging on screen, tight muscles rippling along his bare chest.

It made her… excited.

 _Everywhere_.

She blushed at the thought.

"Of course you like _Jacob_." Dorothy swatted her hand away. "Wolfie, that is so typical of your type."

"Wolfie? _Really_?" She pointedly looked at Dorothy. "Is that like a new nickname or what?" Onscreen, Taylor Lautner was sulking at the camera as rain poured down his chiseled face and she felt blood rush to her cheeks at the sight of him.

"Yeah. You've been calling me Kansas ever since I moved in here." Dorothy sounded smug. "So now I finally have a nickname for you. You're into your wolfboy, who's totally your type. So you'll be _Wolfie_ from now on."

"My _type_?" She turned away from the amazing abs again to look over at Dorothy. "Oh yeah? What's my type then?"

"The _Bad Boys._ " Dorothy poked at her friend's ribs, tickling her and making her giggle. "Plus points if they have a wolf thing going on because you, Wolfie, have this weird obsession with wolves."

There was just something about them… she felt like she understood them somehow. It was hard to explain and she knew that Dorothy would just laugh at whatever silly reason lay beneath the attraction to wolves.

"I like the abs too, though." She changed the topic, choosing instead to focus on the fun stuff. The abs, of course. "Don't you?" Dorothy raised an eyebrow and looked like she didn't agree. "Why? What's your type then? Huh, Kansas? Are you more of an Edward girl?"

Dorothy bit her lip then, and a serious look crossed over her face.

There was something in her eyes that said that this was serious. The girl grabbed the remote and paused the movie. "Kansas? You okay?"

Sometimes Dorothy would get moods, specially when she talked about where she lived before moving here. But something made it seem like this was going to be different.

"To be honest…" Dorothy fidgeted and it became noticeable that her hands were shaking. "I… I think I might prefer… Bella?" She let out a clipped, uncomfortable laugh. "Or maybe Kristen Stewart herself."

The revelation weighed heavily on them and Dorothy was tensing up and trembling.

"Look, just forget I said anything. It's stupid and-"

She put a hand over Dorothy's. "Kansas, no. It's fine." _I get it_ was at the tip of her tongue, but she couldn't bring herself to say it.

"Really?" Dorothy looked up. "You're not like… grossed out or anything?"

"Grossed out?" The very idea of that was unimaginable. She pulled Dorothy in for a hug. "Of course not! You've been my best friend ever since you moved in here. We're cool."

Somewhere in the back of her mind, she wondered if she was capable of crushing on Bella as well.

Maybe not.

But Dorothy?

_Maybe._

As soon as the thought crossed her mind though, she pushed it away, knowing full well that Mother wouldn't be pleased with anything like that coming from her own daughter.

* * *

Videos of psychics and telekinetics demonstrating their powers in facilitated experiments were thrilling to watch. They were exhibited in between segments of a comprehensive lecture from Dr. Robert R. Gold, who spoke extensively about the research being conducted at the Baelfire Research Center.

He told them about his telekinetic volunteers who could move objects around, levitate objects and even control droplets of liquid. He told them about his psychic volunteers who were capable of knowing facts and details they would have had no possible way of knowing.

There was also his discussion on the difficulty of maintaining a controlled environment with human test subjects. Humans are fickle beings, with moods and motivations that can affect an experiment. What more, a human being with supernatural abilities? He expressed the importance in maintaining calm when talking to a gifted person and staying scientific and clinical when running tests with them.

Gifteds, he explained, can be very sensitive and moody. Bringing in a positive aura or at least a neutral, calm aura, delivers the best results. Going into a test or an experiment in a bad mood could cause the subject to be in a bad mood and their abilities will be affected by that.

Dr. Gold wrapped up his lecture by telling them to keep in mind that the subjects are human and flawed and often very opinionated. There was a necessity to respecting that in their research and he looked forward to seeing any applicants come forward with brilliant thesis results and proposals.

"We will have a short break for now, where you are welcome to come forward and speak to Dr. Gold, but please be sure not to crowd him." the Dean's voice came in through the speakers, "After our break, we will have Dr. Leekie of the DYAD Institute deliver a lecture on genetic research and self-directed evolution."

"Should I go up to him?" Belle turned to ask Ariel.

Ariel raised an eyebrow. "Um. _Duh_? You've been fixated on that guy since before you even started writing your thesis."

" _That guy_ ," Belle huffed, "Is a prestigious scientist with a doctorate degree. He has led multiple research programs that have resulted in major breakthroughs in-"

"Belle, you absolute nerd, just go up and talk to him." Ariel practically pulled Belle to her feet and dragged her down to the front, leaving their books and papers at their seats. "Just tell him about your thesis or whatever."

"But I-" Belle felt her voice catch in her throat when Ariel tapped Dr. Gold's shoulder and then scurried away. "Uh… hi. Sir."

Dr. Gold's eyebrows shot up as he looked her over. "Well hello, dearie. Pleasure to meet you." He extended a hand and Belle almost forgot how to move one of hers to shake it. "How can I help you?"

"I'm Belle." Her voice sounded ridiculously stupid as she introduced herself. "Belle French." Well at least she didn't say she was French. Belle French. It could be worse.

"Well, Ms. French." Dr. Gold didn't let go of her hand right away, instead clasping it with his other hand. "Or may I call you Belle?"

"Belle." She swallowed, tried to smile like a normal person. "Please."

Movement caught her eye and she saw Ariel waving aggressively for Belle's attention. Once it was achieved, Ariel formed a gun with one of her hands and mimed shooting herself in the head. Then proceeded to throw her hands up like she was very exasperated and just about giving up on Belle.

Dr. Gold's hand was still clasping hers and they both seemed to notice. He was the first to let go.

"Tell me about yourself. What are you researching?"

"I've been researching on correlations between mental health and supernatural ability." Belle tried to focus on her research. The passion she felt about it would be what could get her through this disaster of a conversation. "I believe there's a connection between the two. Several known gifteds tend to have depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, among others. It's similar to how some of the most creative people have some of the most severe disorders."

Dr. Gold's eyes were focused on her and his smile showed some of his gold teeth. "Interesting. Go on."

"Related to that, I've also been researching a little about genetics. Just like how mental disorders can run in families, I wanted to look for cases where supernatural ability also runs in families." Belle felt more confident as she went on and the interest with which Dr. Gold was eyeing her made Belle feel important and competent. "I had this interesting case study, Elsa, whose telekinetic abilities skipped a generation in her family."

"May I ask why you're researching this?" Dr. Gold asked.

Belle bit her lip. She hadn't expected that question and for a moment felt thrown off-guard. There was a moment she took to collect her thoughts and compose herself. "It's… very personal to me."

It took another moment to brace herself to say it and hope it didn't sound stupid. "My mother had exhibited signs of supernatural ability." She bit her lip. "And had some severe mental disorders."

"Oh." Dr. Gold looked intrigued. "How is she?"

"She's dead."

Dr. Gold seemed taken aback, then put a hand over his chest. "My condolences to you, dearie."

"It happened very long ago." Belle admitted. "And I was really young, so I don't really remember her. But my Papa talks about her sometimes." Talking about this felt strange, like she was baring herself open. When she had been dragged over to the most prestigious scientist of this time, Belle hadn't expected to be pouring out any personal details.

"Looking over her diaries before she…" Belle shook her head, as if to brush off the thought. "I was looking over her diaries, and it struck me how the line between psychic and psychotic is easy to blur. What if the demons described by those in mental institutions are actually real creatures beyond our ability to see? What if they're not actually having delusions or hallucinations? Where do we draw the line? My thesis hasn't answered that question yet, but it did help me find connections."

"I like what I'm hearing, dearie." Dr. Gold reached into his pocket and held out his card. "I want you to send me an email with a brief about your thesis. There's an internship program we're developing and we're looking for capable students who go above and beyond and are highly passionate about their research."

With shaky hands and a heart full of disbelief, Belle reached out and took the card.

* * *

Lunch break was always the best time. She enjoyed being able to stretch her legs and not have to sit still and listen for such a long, dragging time. She enjoyed being able to sit with Dorothy and eat next to her and talk about things with her and giggle with her whenever attractive schoolmates passed by.

"She's cute, what about her?" She nudged Dorothy and pointed towards an exchange student from Scotland. She had fiery hair and was rumored to be trying out for the softball team. "Her name's Merida."

"Oh stop it, you." Dorothy nudged her back, but there was a blush spreading over those rosy cheeks. It got worse when Merida noticed them watching and tilted her head to one side.

"Oh my god!" Dorothy buried her face in her friend's shoulder.

"Hmmm…" Tapping at her chin, the girl started eyeing the crowd of students for other attractive girls that might catch Dorothy's eye. There was a very small part of her that did like the feel of Dorothy being so close and being all over her. But thoughts of Mother's disapproval kept the girl from dwelling too much on those thoughts. "Oooh!" Jasmine was starting to walk by.

"Shut up! She's taken!" Dorothy had followed her gaze towards Jasmine and was swatting again.

"Dude, I didn't even say anything yet!" She smirked at Dorothy, "She's _hot_ though."

Dorothy's face was absolutely red now. "She is, but ugh. Just shut up." In the middle of saying something more, Dorothy stopped and her eyes widened. "Wolfie, turn around!"

"Um… hi."

Warmth rushed through her as she heard a familiar voice behind her. Giddiness was making her stomach flip several times. She turned her head to see Peter, smiling and looking down at his converse shoes.

Doing her best to come off as cool and casual as possible, she propped her elbow up on the table and rested her hand in her cheek. "Hey, Peter."

Peter was biting his lip and shuffling his feet. With his head tilted down, he moved his eyes up to meet hers and she just felt like melting. "You wanna… y'know…"

"Wanna what?" She was biting her own lip now, high on the giddiness of where this conversation was going.

"Like… maybe… hang out sometime?"

It was nearly impossible to stop herself from jumping up and down or waggling her limbs in excitement. Instead, she just widened her smile and ran her fingers through her hair. "I'd love to! When would you want to meet up?"

"Maybe… tonight?" Realizing that might be too soon, he widened his eyes and doubled back. "Or tomorrow night maybe?"

No. Night time wouldn't do. It was nearly impossible to get permission to do anything at night because of how strict Mother was. Especially when it was headache week. It wasn't headache week now, but it wasn't worth the trouble trying to get permission for a night time getaway.

"How bout this Saturday?" She suggested instead, hoping that wasn't breaking some rule and she wasn't overstepping somehow.

Peter looked surprised for a moment, then his smile came back and he nodded vigorously. "Yeah! Sure! Saturday… lunch?"

"Definitely."

Putting his hands in his pockets, Peter leaned forward. Their faces were quite close to each others and his eyes were so warm and lovely and she almost wanted to scream out the butterflies in her stomach. "See you then."

"You take good care of my girl, alright?" Dorothy piped up, putting an arm around her friend. "I'll cut you if you break her heart."

Still with that ridiculously adorable smirk, he saluted to Dorothy. "Yes, ma'am!"

"Good." Dorothy nodded.

Wit a roguish wink, Peter straightened up and sauntered off. From the table where he usually ate, the rest of the team hooted and hollered and clapped.

"Congrats."

The smile faded and the excitement dropped. She turned to see Dorothy smiling, but it looked stiff and forced and her eyes looked almost sad. "He's a catch, I think."

"Kansas, I-"

Dorothy waved a hand in a dismissive gesture. "No, it's fine." She smiled again, this time it looked more genuine. "You do you. I'll be okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hai. Chapter 14 is going back to our regular programming and I'm not sure yet when it'll be ready since it's still being written and I want it to have the impact it deserves since that's when SwanQueen and RedBeauty come together for the first time... So we'll see how well I can put it together. Till then, I continue to enjoy y'all dumping your feels on me.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back to our usual programming today and MY GAHD this chapter was so hard to write because there was so much going on and so many characters in the scene. WHEW. I hope I did the scene justice

When Belle made her way into the conference room, everyone was already seated and Dr. Gold was at the front with the screen.

As much as she wanted to sit as far away from Tamara as possible, Belle knew that would be petty, so she reluctantly forced herself to flop down on the empty seat next to her. Tamara barely nodded in acknowledgement of Belle's presence.

"How kind of you to join us, Belle, dearie." Dr. Gold said before he pushed a button for the screen to flash pictures of 204, Emma and Regina.

204's picture was dated, and Belle felt her chest tighten at the sight of the frightened fifteen-year-old girl with long hair and wide green eyes and pale skin. Emma's mugshot was there again. Regina's picture was the one from her file.

"Igor, I thought I told you to take a new picture of 204 for our files." Dr. Gold glared at an assistant who was now pressing himself against the wall like he was trying to disappear.

Rolling his eyes, Dr. Gold then turned to the team that consisted of himself, Dr. Whale, Dr. Hopper, Belle, Tamara and three other assistants. Gaston and another guard were stationed at corners of the room.

"Tonight, instead of the control exercises we've been doing with the wolf," Dr. Gold continued. "Thanks to Tamara's brilliant suggestions, we'll be bringing in 201 and 223 to interact with 204."

He pushed another button to show a room similar to the one 204 had been chained in last night. There was a horizontal bar on the floor, separating the chains from some chairs and monitors. Belle figured the bar could be activated into an eletified fence of some sort. Most likely as a precaution if the wolf managed to break free of the chains.

"We'll use Testing Room 2B for this. It has the right chains and restraints for 204's transformation as well as room for the chairs and scanners where 201 and 223 may be stationed."

The screen transitioned to a table with the abilities of the three subjects.

* * *

**SUBJECT 201**

Telekinesis, underdeveloped biokinesis and pyrokinesis, potential ESP, one recorded instance of levitation; has shown ability to accelerate healing and regeneration.

* * *

**SUBJECT 204**

_HUMAN STATE_

unusual strength; heightened senses; can extend fingernails into claws; teeth tend to sharpen; eyes sometimes turn gold/yellow;

_WOLF STATE_

enhanced strength; enhanced senses; accelerated healing/regeneration

* * *

**SUBJECT 223**

Aura Reading; Clairvoyance; Remote-viewing; generally a range of ESP abilities; rapidly developing telepathy; underdeveloped postcognition; untested instances of mild precognition; may have potential for Telekinesis but no properly recorded instances yet

* * *

Dr. Gold gave them time to go over the screen before he spoke. "We hope to develop a program in which the abilities of both 223 and 201 can be used to control the abilities of 204."

There was something about that statement that rubbed Belle the wrong way and she tried to bottle it and hide her discomfort.

"223 has a wide range of telepathic abilities and is reported as being able to look into and get into other minds. Belle has noted that 223 claims to be able to see through 201's eyes."

It wasn't so long ago that being given a special mention like that would have thrilled Belle. Now, it left a bitter taste in her mouth and she felt disgusted with herself.

"201 on the other hand is a highly capable telekinetic. When pushed, she has also the potential to be biokinetic. That could be _key_ to controlling 204. Are we all following what I'm getting at?"

Dr. Hopper raised his pen, "Sir, so essentially, we want 223 to control 204's mind and 201 to control her body?"

Grinning like they weren't talking about taking autonomy away from a living being, Dr. Gold said, "Right you are, Hopper. That's exactly the outcome we want to achieve with this new program."

"What's the guarantee that 201 and 223 will cooperate?" Dr. Whale asked, head resting on his palm. "201 might be compelled to do as asked, but we all know how 223 can be."

"I think," There was a look in Dr. Gold's eyes that sent chills up Belle's spine. "That with the right push of the right buttons, any of them can be compelled to do what we want them to do."

This was sickening and infuriating and Belle had to swallow down the rapidly rising anger. She wasn't used to being this angry for this long and it was stressful being in this state and a part of her wished she could go back home and sleep some more.

But she knew she couldn't do that.

Specially not now that Emma and Regina's fears may actually be coming true.

* * *

The headaches were coming in again, telling her it would be the full moon soon. She was still strapped to the bed with assistants watching over her. Struggling and squirming weren't working and she had little choice but to breathe and whimper her way through the waves of pain.

Moments like these, she just wished her head would explode.

"Should we administer the painkillers?"

"Dr. Hopper didn't say. He's still at the meeting."

"Dammit. I hate watching her when she's not sedated."

If she just had the words to apologize to them for being difficult, she would have spoken. Instead, a wail came out of her and her body convulsed as waves and waves of agony crashed over her. Her head was splitting, her ribs were breaking, her eyes were burning up. She dug her claws into her palms and felt the skin break open again.

Pain.

So much pain.

She tried to think of Peter. But his bloody remains haunted her instead. She tried to think of Dorothy. But her limp body pierced through instead. She tried to think of Granny, but news headlines of the serial killer were what came through instead. She couldn't think of anything that could ground her and ease her through this.

Not that she deserved that.

Monsters deserve their punishment.

Finally, the pain eased and she lay limp against the bed, damp and warm and dazed.

"Heartbeat's more or less back to normal. A bit fast, but it'll normalize soon."

"Same with breathing. Brainwaves are all over the place though, but that's from the full moon. Nothing unusual."

The door swung open and several guards came in, and the subject felt her heart sink when she saw no Mulan.

"Here's our pass to transport 204. Gold wants her in Testing Room 2B."

* * *

Seeing Emma and Regina being transported into the room like prisoners with handcuffs and guards made Belle's blood boil. She held her hands behind her back so she could clench them into tight fists.

One of the guards, the big guy, Gaston, roughly shoved Emma into one of the chairs.

"Get the fuck off me!" Emma was squirming and struggling despite one guard firmly holding her upper arms and shoulders. Another guard was unlocking the cuffs so they could strap Emma's arms down, but the girl wasn't cooperating. She managed to wriggle free from their grasp and stand up, only to have Gaston's fist collide with her cheek.

"Sit." Gaston shoved Emma back down. "The fuck." He roughly strapped her right arm onto the chair. "Down." He caught her flailing left arm by the wrist and strapped that down too.

Belle saw the bruise forming along Emma's cheek and the blood welling up from her lip where she must have bit it during the punch.

"Gaston, could you please-" Dr. Hopper seemed to shrink when Gaston turned to face him. "Be a tad gentler on the subjects? Maybe?"

Gaston merely grunted his response and walked over to the other chair, where Regina was being strapped down with less difficulty. After checking the work of the other guards, he gestured for them to take their positions nearby, ready to move in whenever needed.

Now, it was time for the scientists to hook the scanners up to the two subjects. The two _people_. Belle corrected herself.

_Mind telling me what the fuck is going on? And why they're treating Regina like this?_

Belle felt Emma's anger and fear and worry and had to breathe out the tension and straighten up, lightly shaking her stiffening hands. Some new tests would be conducted tonight. They would be involving Subject 204.

Images from last night came swimming back into Belle's mind and she had to focus on keeping her face neutral and relaxed as she played out the image of 204. A starved, broken young woman, a shell of a person, with sunken green eyes and a shaved head and a recently scarred face. Scars riddling her skin from cruel tests to record her healing rates. Electrical burns from the brutal and outdated training methods employed to tame and subdue the wolf.

_Shit._

She thought about how peaceful 204 looked in her sleep. How she almost looked much younger when her sharp features were relaxed. How painful it was to see the fresh scar across her face.

_That's fucked up._

It was.

It really was.

_What are they going to do with us?_

There was fear radiating through Emma now. Fear and anger.

But above all of that, there was worry.

_I can't let that happen to Regina._

Belle was taken aback by the depth of emotion that Emma was feeling, and it clashed with all the files that went on about how she was self-absorbed and unsympathetic and self-preserving. This girl wanted nothing more than to see to it that the one person she felt a connection with could be taken out of here, safe and sound.

_She's helped make this hellhole become almost bearable. She matters to me._

Before Belle could come up with a response, Dr. Gold came into the room and strode straight over to Emma and Regina. "Good evening, dearies."

Emma and Regina exchanged a glance.

Regina was the one to speak, although she made sure to cast a warning look at Emma before doing so. "Can I ask what we're here for? My tests aren't usually run at night."

"Excellent question, dearie." Dr. Gold spoke as if he was in a classroom with young students. "Tonight, we want the two of you to collaborate, which I'm aware you enjoy doing."

_What the fuck is this going to be about?_

Belle could feel Emma's rising distress and how she was trying to mask that with anger.

"Okay." Regina kept her voice calm and collected. "What are we to collaborate on tonight?"

"Essentially? We want you to control Subject 204." Dr. Gold said, looking from Regina, to Emma, then back. "We want you, Regina, to control what you can of her body. And you, Emma, to control what you can of her mind."

"What the actual fuck?" Emma couldn't hold back this time and she jerked in her seat. "You're fucking sick!"

"Come now," Dr. Gold rolled his eyes, and his condescending dismissal added fresh flames to Belle's anger and it was like that moment when she used to admire him was a lifetime ago. "It's not like you're going to be controlling a _person_. It's not supposed to be such a major issue."

"What, are we going to be controlling some kind of animal?" Regina asked.

Gold's teeth gleamed. "In a manner of speaking."

Belle was caught off guard by the sudden pull that felt like her head was toppling forward. She had to clench her teeth and shift her footing to keep herself grounded and steady, but it felt like she was doing it from far away. It was like a part of her was floating somewhere else.

She felt Emma's rapidly beating heart coinciding with the beeping machines. She felt Regina's worry and better-hidden fear.

_Show her._

That was Emma, directing Belle to think about 204. There was a fresh wave of turmoil as she thought about the way Dr. Gold had shocked and beaten the wolf to within an inch of her life. She thought about the painful transformation as 204's body bent and broke itself back into human form. She thought about how drained and starved 204 was, with her protruding, scarred ribs and her pale limbs.

The connection was broken when the doors burst open.

As subtly as she could, Belle rubbed at her temples to ease the dull throb. A glance over at Emma's readings showed that she was still very stressed out. Her facial expressions showed more of her anger though. She was good at that. Regina kept her demeanor calm and collected- chin high, shoulders back.

There was a commotion going on as several guards tried to pull at chains.

Belle felt her blood run cold when she saw the guards pull in a struggling 204. She was squirming and bending over as they pulled at the chains hooked up to her collar. Her hands were cuffed behind her back and when they pulled too hard, she stumbled and couldn't catch herself, landing heavily on her knee then her chest.

Glancing around her, Belle saw that Tamara looked irritated. Dr. Gold looked exasperated. Dr. Hopper looked worried. Emma looked horrified. Regina's mouth was set but her eyebrows had shot up.

The guards roughly pulled 204 to her feet then shoved her down into the third chair. As they struggled to move her into the strapped down position of Emma and Regina, Belle realized that 204 wasn't struggling like she was trying to get away. The way her hands were clenched fists and her face was contorted, it looked more like she was in pain and reacting to it and the guards were mistaking that as struggles and lack of cooperation.

When they finally succeeded in strapping her down -noticeably with silver bands as opposed to Regina and Emma's leather straps- 204 was still squirming and trembling.

Belle had to hold herself back from going over to comfort the poor girl.

_She's in pain._

Emma's voice was coming into Belle's head again.

_I can feel it and I don't know if I can take it._

"Regina, Emma," Dr. Gold walked over to stand by 204, who continued to squirm. Soft whimpers were starting to come through her lips. "I would like you to meet Subject 204."

He spread his bony fingers over the top of her head and pulled it backwards, forcing her to face them instead of bending over. She was breathing heavily and Belle felt her legs going weak and her stomach going cold and her head heating up.

"You want us to _control_ her?" Emma's disgust was clear in her voice and in her expression. "How _fucked up_ do you think we are?"

The wave of pain seemed to have passed because 204 looked more limp in the chair now, breathing heavily. Her green eyes were darting around and trying to take in what was going on.

"I was hoping you'd be more cooperative." Dr. Gold said. "You, Emma, don't even have to fully control her mind yet. We hope to work our way up to that. For now, we want you to read what you can from her in this state and then read her again when she goes into her wolf state." He pointed to Dr. Hopper. "How much longer do we have?"

"Two hours, give or take." Dr. Hopper answered.

"So for tonight," Regina kept her voice even. "You want Emma to just read 204. What about me?"

"We hope you're willing to practice your biokinetic abilities." Dr. Gold answered. "As best you can."

Regina looked at Emma, then at Dr. Gold. "What if I can't?"

"Dearie, don't push me." Dr. Gold's smile was icy and Belle wasn't sure if she wanted to walk out of the room and get as far away from here as possible or run over and set everyone free and save them from this disgusting place. "I wouldn't recommend it."

_Her mind is so hard to read._

Fear was deep and cold in Emma, but she had anger boiling as well and her defense mechanism was to throw more fire into the anger so it could overpower the fear.

"What if I _want_ to push you? Are you going to do to me the shit you've been doing to her?" Emma's monitors were spiking as she got more riled up, and, Belle realized, because Emma was also secretly using her abilities.

_204's thoughts… It's garbled and nonlinear. But she's scared and she thinks she's dangerous. She's confused. She keeps thinking vaguely about a dark basement and her Mother. I also keep seeing images of two teenagers- a guy and a girl. And then she also keeps thinking about…_

Belle felt the lurching feeling again and she found herself feeling intense pain and self-hatred and desolation and guilt and fear. She felt the guilt of killing the boy she loved and killing the girl she was afraid to love. She felt the horror of knowing she was a monster. She felt the distress of knowing she was surrounded by people she might harm if the wolf got loose. She felt pain throbbing through her head and she wished she could die but knew she didn't deserve to die.

There was a lurch again and Belle nearly stumbled.

"The fuck is going on with you?" Tamara was looking at Belle suspiciously.

"Uh… spasm. Thing." Belle would have kicked herself for how stupid she sounded. "It's cold in here."

Tamara's expression was somewhere between disgust and confusion, but she eventually rolled her eyes and returned her focus to the scientists and their subjects.

"Well, Emma," Dr. Gold was curling and curling his fingers over 204's short hair. "If you push me, I think I'm willing to push just how low you really score on empathy."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Emma demanded, "What like are you going to start zapping your electric stick at Regina, too?"

Dr. Gold scoffed, "Heavens, no, dearie. I don't just yet have clearance to run tests like that on Regina." He tightened his grip on the short strands. "But I do for 204 over here."

"You're a sick fuck!" Emma struggled against the restraints. "If I wasn't strapped down right now, I'd have my hands around that stupid skinny little fucking neck of yours!"

"Calm yourself, dearie." Dr. Gold sounded like he was reprimanding a child and it only served to anger Emma further.

Though the link to 204 was broken, Belle still felt Emma's emotions and wondered if she could find 204's name. Referring to this person, who was already so stripped of her humanity, by nothing more than her subject number was unsettling and wrong.

_It's hard._

Hard as in 204 couldn't remember her name anymore?

_As in she doesn't think she deserves to have a name. She refers to herself as the subject. As the monster. As the wolf. As 204._

That revelation hit Belle hard and she felt her throat tightening up and she had to remind herself to keep her head up and her face calm.

_Yeah, that's it. Just keep your composure. Coz God, I sure can't. Not with how bad she looks. Those scars and those burns, man. I can't. Connecting with her is heavy shit and I'm afraid that I won't be able to handle it._

Belle wondered if Emma had tried to communicate with 204 yet or if she'd only so far been squatting in 204's mind.

_I haven't yet. I think she'll freak out if I jump on her suddenly. I'm trying to ease into her with images since she seems to go through her thoughts more visually than verbally._

* * *

None of this was making any sense and the subject was feeling her mounting distress take a tight hold on her chest. There were these new faces and two of them were strapped down just like she was and she didn't understand why and she didn't like seeing them being treated the way she was.

Her head was still throbbing, and she could feel that the full moon was just a few hours away.

Dr. Gold was still gripping her hair and keeping her head up and she couldn't understand what was going on and what they were hoping to accomplish and Mulan wasn't here and the subject didn't know what to look at to collect herself.

A feeling passed over her.

It felt like it was coming outside of her.

It was a strange feeling. It was holding hands. It was standing together. It was sitting at a bar and laughing with two guys named Neal and Killian. It was companionship. It was solidarity.

She didn't deserve any of that.

She was a monster. She deserved isolation and punishment.

A monster that could maul Peter until his remains were unrecognizable did not deserve any companionship. A monster that could swipe at Dorothy and break her did not deserve solidarity.

"I have a feeling." Dr. Gold still hadn't let go of her head. "That you are already linking with her right now. I'm noticing spikes in your readings that coincide with each other."

What was that supposed to mean?

A fresh wave of pain burst through her skull and she jerked her head from Dr. Gold's hands and screamed as jolts of agony burned through her body, causing her muscles to spasm and jerk against the burning silver restraints.

Another scream was mingled with hers and she felt like someone was sharing her pain. She felt like she wasn't alone.

She deserved to be alone.

_No, you don't._

Amidst the agony of her body pushing and pulling against the power of the full moon, she felt a thought invade her head. It was a voice that was strange and foreign and delirious from the pain it took her a while to connect the voice in her head to the blond girl strapped down to the chair in front.

The subject deserved this. After the pain and grief she brought upon so many people, she deserved to die a thousand times and come back a thousand times to be tested and prodded and hurt a thousand more times.

It was an eternity before the pain finally passed and she slumped in the chair, breathing heavily.

_I'm with you._

Looking up, the subject made eye contact with the blond girl.

_My name is Emma._

The subject felt the girl pushing and prodding for a name.

The subject didn't deserve a name. She was 204. She was no longer the person she used to be. She was a _monster_.

She jerked in her chair and tried to get away from the poking, prodding intrusion in her mind that was trying to pull her name back from its depths.

_Okay, I'll stop. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pushed._

"Emma," Dr. Gold had moved over to stand at Emma's side now. "I know you linked with her just now. And apparently, you're capable of sharing her pain as well. Care to tell me more about that?"

"I'm not telling you shit."

The subject looked away from Emma and looked over at the new girl that had been nice. Her name was B… Be… It started with a B. She couldn't remember. Something about Dorothy and a movie crossed the subject's mind and she wasn't sure why.

_Her name is Belle._

There was that intrusive voice again.

For a moment, the subject felt another presence in her head. This one wasn't as rough and edged as Emma's. It was soft and worried and distressed and felt a depth of care and concern for the subject that was impossible to comprehend.

_I'm going to take you away from here. I just don't know how._

The subject shook her head side to side to shake off the invasive thought of two people inside her head.

Soft presence was pushed out, but Emma's stayed.

"Very well." Dr. Gold took his prod from one of the assistants and the subject felt her heartbeat picking up as she saw it come closer and closer towards her. "If you're still linked to her, like I suspect you are, maybe this will entice you to be more cooperative."

The prod touched her shoulder and she screamed as it sent agony through her body and made her spasm and jerk and struggle and scream.

Her screams weren't alone.

Leave me alone, the subject thought. It was bad enough that these two other girls were being experimented on as well. Emma didn't need to share the subject's pain. Emma didn't need to put herself through any of this.

_I'm with you._

The pain finally eased and they both slumped in their chairs.

"Are you more inclined to cooperate, Emma, dearie?" Dr. Gold asked.

Emma was breathing heavily, but she managed to straighten up and look Dr. Gold in the eye. "Fat chance."

They barely had time to breathe before pain and agony and electricity burned through them again and it was strange not feeling it alone and it was horrible knowing that someone else was feeling this and knowing it was all her fault. She wished Emma stopped sharing the pain. She wished Emma wasn't feeling the pain. Emma didn't deserve the pain.

"You don't deserve this anymore than I do!" Emma's words were screamed out as she jerked and struggled in her seat.

"STOP!" That was Belle, and she was moving forward, only to be stopped and restrained by Gaston. "Dr. Gold, please! Stop it! This is torture!"

The pain stopped and they collapsed into their chairs once more.

But seeing someone so nice being handled so roughly by Gaston made the subject angry. She growled and glared at Gaston and wished she could get up and tear him away from the nice girl.

 _Belle_. Emma's voice came into the subject's mind and there was exhaustion and fear and pain.

Belle. The subject wanted to tear Belle away from Gaston's hands.

"Dr. Gold, please! It's not working, it's only hurting them!" Belle was struggling against Gaston's grasp.

* * *

Belle tried to pull herself free of the guard's hands on her shoulder and arm until he maneuvered her around and shoved her against the table. She was being bent over it and her arm was being twisted painfully against her back and her cheek was pressed against the cold table and she was scared and horrified, but the anger was still there. She tried not to cry out as pain built up in her shoulder the more she struggled and the more he twisted.

"Sir? Gaston maintained his painful grip on her arm. "Orders?"

Dr. Gold's mouth was a thin-set line as he looked over at Belle.

"Should I cuff her?" Gaston prompted.

It felt like hours before Dr. Gold finally spoke. "No. Let her go."

"Yes, sir."

Gaston released Belle and she stiffly brought her arms in front of her and pressed them against the table, propping herself up and catching her breath.

"Do you _want_ to be taken off the program?" Tamara quipped and Belle had to restrain herself from snapping back.

"Is there another way you recommend getting this juvenile to cooperate?" Dr. Gold asked, eyes locked on Belle.

She felt put on the spot and she didn't know what to say. If only she could tell them to put a stop to this and just let everyone get out of here and rest and sleep and be safe. The pain in her shoulder was still there and she couldn't let herself dwell on it knowing that 204, and even Emma, were going through much worse.

"Well?" Dr. Gold prompted when Belle didn't give an answer.

"I'll do it." Regina's voice was soft and it wavered, but as they all turned to look at her, she spoke again, more clearly this time. "I'll do whatever you want me to do. Just… please don't shock them like that again."

Dr. Gold's smile was back. "Very well. Thank you for your cooperation, Regina, dear." He strode over to stand by Regina. "For now, I won't require you to do anything just yet. When the wolf does eventually transform, that's when I would like you to take control of her body."

Regina took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Yes, Dr. Gold."

"Good girl." Dr. Gold's praise was condescending and infuriating.

Belle ran a hand through her hair and straightened up. She felt sick and weak and horrified. The pain from Gaston's rough treatment was still there, but Belle refused to give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he'd hurt her. She grit her teeth and kept her chin up.

_She's worried about you. And angry at Gaston for hurting you. And she's feeling this nasty headache that she connects with the full moon and her transformation._

And it surprised Belle how Emma refused to let go of the link with 204 and continued to share in her pain.

_She's been alone here for such a long time. I can't just stand by and let her continue to face this shit by herself._

It was impossible to grasp the concept of having half your life taken away. To be cut open and shocked and beaten and burned and tortured for seven years. She was a teenager when she got here and now… she was a shell of a person and it broke Belle's heart.

 _Seven years? Really?_ Fucking hell. _If I can just get my hands around Gold's fucking throat. Or if I could just reach Gaston's fucking gun. Regina doesn't want to do anything sudden and stupid. She's scared it's all going to end badly if we do anything now._

As much as Belle wanted to get them out of here and take there somewhere safe and just act here, act now, she knew that was out of the question. There were too many guards, too much security, too much surveillance. This was something that needed to be planned out and not done on a whim, no matter how much Belle wished she could.

_You really want to help us get out of here?_

Belle hardened her resolve. No matter what it took, she would get them out of here.

"Despite 223's lack of cooperation, we still did gather some valuable findings." Dr. Hopper was speaking to Dr. Gold and it seemed like an attempt to calm the head scientist. "We know for a fact now that when linking with someone, Emma can share not just their thoughts and abstract emotions, but she can concretely feel their pain as well."

Dr. Gold nodded as he toyed with his prod. "That is true."

"We have a little more than an hour before the transformation is due." Dr. Whale spoke up from his position among the monitors. "Shall we start moving her into position?"

"Are we going to be keeping the gown on?" Tamara asked, and Dr. Gold turned to her. "I mean like isn't her wolf form a bit… bigger? That's a waste of the gown if you ask me."

Disgust churned in Belle's stomach as she turned on Tamara. "Are you actually suggesting what I think you're suggesting?"

"What?" Tamara looked Belle up and down. "We should be practical here. What even are _you_ doing here?"

The jab stung and Belle clenched her fists. As tempting as it was to engage Tamara in this argument, Belle instead turned to Dr. Gold. "Dr. Gold, we can't seriously be considering _stripping_ 204 before her transformation." It was impossible at this point to keep her anger contained and she spat out the words as she glared at scientist she once thought was brilliant but now knew was cruel and _evil_.

Gaston started moving towards Belle, but stopped at a gesture from Dr. Gold.

"We do go through quite a few gowns when she shifts." Dr. Gold said. "It _is_ a tad wasteful."

"What about basic human decency?" Belle demanded, pushing past Gaston and standing in front of Dr. Gold. "What about at least _trying_ to have some semblance of humanity with how we treat 204?"

"Watch yourself, dearie." Dr. Gold's eyes were cold and dark and narrowed. "You're stepping out of line."

"Dr. Gold, sir," From his place by the monitors with Dr. Whale, Dr. Hopper chimed in, "I'd have to agree with Belle. Shouldn't we at least let 204 have some… er… modesty?"

"What modesty would a beast like her need?" Dr. Whale turned to face Dr. Hopper, "I've said it before, I'll say it again. You are far too soft with her. She's an _animal_."

Dr. Hopper's face was reddening. "She deserves some _humane_ treatment either way."

"We go through so many of those stupid gowns every year, why don't we actually save some of them?" Dr. Whale's fists were clenched and he was standing up now.

The argument was starting to escalate. Belle looked at Dr. Gold and searched his face for the brilliant, ingenious, passionate man she had once looked up to, but there really was no trace of him anymore. Instead all she saw was this man of cruelty and obsession. This horrible person who paraded himself as revolutionary. The temptation to call him out on it was strong and nearly impossible to resist but she had to remind herself of Mulan's warning. Nothing good would come of being kicked out of the facility.

" _HEY_!" Emma's yell broke through the noise of arguing. "She said yes."

Dr. Gold raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

Emma's swollen lip was trembling as she winced, then she straightened up and looked Dr. Gold in the eye. "She doesn't want to be a bother and she'll cooperate."

There was interest in Dr. Gold's eyes. "Did she now? What's it like, reading her thoughts? How does it differ from Regina's?"

At the barrage of questions, Emma set her jaw and lifted her chin. The expression on her face was so clear, she didn't need to say the words out loud.

_I'm not telling him any shit._

Recognizing Emma's look, Dr. Gold rolled his eyes then gestured towards the guards. "Well you heard her, did you not? Prepare 204 for the shift and get rid of the gown."

This was sickening. Belle felt her stomach churning and her throat tightening and her chest pounding. She turned away from 204 as the guards started moving in towards her. There was no sound of struggling, just the clanking of chains and the thudding of boots and the click of locks.

As Belle glanced over at Regina and Emma, she saw that they couldn't watch either. Emma was looking off to the side while Regina had her eyes closed as she bit her scarred lip.

* * *

Just as they were finishing up chaining her loosely enough for the wolf to have some slack, she felt exposed. Not cold, she didn't feel cold very often. But bare and inhuman.

Not that she was human.

_You are._

Emma hadn't let go of their link yet and the subject wasn't sure what to feel about it.

_You are more human than Gold is._

That wasn't true. Dr. Gold was doing everything within his power to find a cure for the wolf. He was going to great lengths to test and experiment and discover how best to cure the subject. He was always testing her and pushing her to see how well she could fight the shift. He said that they were doing everything they could to reach the day when she wouldn't have to shift anymore.

There was a new presence in her head, this one more calm. Her name was Regina. The subject didn't know how she knew that. She just knew it and felt it.

She saw how Dr. Gold would talk to Mother when they thought she wasn't listening. She saw how Dr. Gold and Mother would negotiate how long she would stay at the facility and how much it would cost. She saw Dr. Gold talking to her ever since she was a child, convincing her that she had to use her powers to be able to control them. She felt the pain of Mother's harsh words. She felt the fear of disappointing Dr. Gold. She felt the frustration of having to spend so much time in the facility. She felt every opportunity that slipped out of her grasp as Mother forced her to put away the universities that accepted her into their programs. It was especially painful when even the ones with offered scholarships had to be put away.

_We deserve better than this. There was deeply buried anger in those words._

_They_ deserved better than this. None of them killed the ones they cared about. None of them were monsters.

 _Try me_. There was a pull in her stomach and in her head and she felt like she was falling over even if she was already crouched down on the floor. She found herself transported back to when Regina was young.

Experiencing the memory second hand made it hazy, and it was so long ago, that most of it was scattered images and raw emotions.

Father was playing with her. They were messing around. Playing with dolls or horses. Figurines that meant the world to her. She was happy. She was loved.

Then there was Mother. She smelled strange. It took years for her to realize the smell was alcohol. She was yelling. Father was yelling. Everyone was yelling and she was terrified and wanted everything to just stop.

And it just happened.

She didn't know how it happened, but she felt anger rush out of her because she wanted to stop them from fighting.

Father lay still on the floor. Mother had blocked the force of the anger and was left standing.

_We may be monsters because of our pasts, but we do not deserve this torture._

They were wrong. She curled up and clutched at her head, wanting them to go away and leave her alone.

 _204, please_. This was Belle's voice. Her presence was soft and blue and soothing and it brought the subject back to when they had that brief moment of shared comfort. It brought the subject back to when Belle felt care and concern and worry for the wolf. It brought the subject back to when she was being viewed as someone helpless and tortured and abused. Not someone being cured or controlled. _We want to help you._

The pain was starting to build up in her head again. She knew they were all wrong. She knew what she was and what she was, was a monster.

Burning, building pain took hold of her head and she felt Emma pull Belle and Regina out, but she herself stayed.

It was like her head was going to explode and she didn't know if she would ever get used to the feeling as her skull split apart and her jaw dislocated itself and her teeth broke through her gums.

There was screaming coming from somewhere in front of her, but she couldn't concentrate on it as her ears stretched and pulled into position. Her eyes were burning so bad, they felt like they were going to melt out of their sockets and her shoulders were dislocating and relocating and her ribs were breaking themselves up and stretching forward and her spine was arching and contracting and breaking and pushing and pulling her into position.

_I'm with you._

It wasn't by much, but it was enough to be noticeable. The pain was just a little bit lighter, just a little bit blunter. The transition was just a little bit smoother.

The burning agony was still there, but she felt less like she was going to die in the middle of transforming.

* * *

Emma was thrashing in her bonds, screaming out in pain and Dr. Hopper had to attend to her. The monitors were showing intense spikes to her vitals and although there was no physical, recordable cause to Emma's pain, the accelerated heartrate and blood pressure were reaching dangerous levels.

"Don't you fucking sedate me." Emma yelled at them the moment she saw them preparing needles. Another scream tore out of her just as 204's body jerked into unnatural positions. There was blood coming out of Emma's nose and she looked like the strain of maintaining contact with 204 was taking a toll on her.

"This should ease the pain and calm you," Dr. Hopper insisted as he pressed the needle into Emma's arm.

There was so much going on at the same time, Belle felt overwhelmed and distressed and unsteady on her feet. She looked over at Tamara, who had her arms folded across her chest and her face cold and expressionless.

"How can you be so okay with all of this?" Belle winced as 204's scream transitioned into a long, piercing howl.

"Besides everything being really fascinating shit," Tamara said, "It's simple. I care more about _this job_ than I do about _them_. They're not _like us_ , after all."

Wanting nothing more than to get the subjects out of here, Belle held back the exasperated sigh she wished she could let out.

Emma's vitals were starting to stabilize, but the strain of the contact was too much and she looked like she was close to passing out.

"Regina." Dr. Gold's voice pulled Regina away from her focus on Emma. "The wolf is there. Control it."

Belle chewed at her bottom lip and ran her hands through her hair and wished this wasn't real. The movement of lifting her arm reminded her of her stiff, sore shoulder and she had to keep herself from wincing visibly.

There was so much going on.

Emma was being removed from the chair and strapped down onto a stretcher and they were taking her away.

Reluctance was clear on Regina's face, but she turned her eyes on the wolf.

The wolf was pulling against the chains, barking and growling. She was baring her teeth and her fur stuck out around the collar and her protruding ribs heaved and her muscles were tensed as she strained against the chains.

Then she _froze_.

Panting rapidly, she seemed to be trying to move. There was exaggerated tension in the muscles along her shoulders and limbs. Tremors were running through her body.

The concentration on Regina was intense.

Whining and crying, the wolf fought against the external force controlling her body.

"Excellent, dearie." Dr. Gold was rubbing his palms. "Excellent."

"I'm not sure how much longer I can do this." Regina's voice shook, giving away the strain it was taking her to keep the wolf in her power.

Slowly, the wolf's head was forced down, then her forelegs were pushed in front of her until her chest touched the floor. The whimpering was reaching a piercing pitch as the wolf was forced into a bowing position with her head between her forelegs.

Sweat was coating Regina's furrowed brow as she fought against the wolf's struggles. The machines were beeping loudly and rapidly.

"Dr. Gold, please." Dr. Hopper was checking on Regina now. "Her vitals are-"

"She can do this." Dr. Gold's snap quieted Dr. Hopper.

The wolf was whining and her own vitals were spiking. Her tail was between her legs and her body was trembling violently as she continued to be forced in that bowing position.

"This is insane." Belle moved forward but was stopped by Tamara putting an arm in front of her.

"Are you really so desperate to get yourself kicked out of here." Tamara asked, and the look she was giving Belle was that of some twisted fascination. "I mean, you _do_ know that this unprofessional behavior is going to get you pulled out and that would mean being far away from your new best friends, right?

The world must have just stopped turning if Tamara was suddenly the voice of reason.

"I mean, if you know that but still want to make a scene," Tamara put her arm down and clasped her hands behind her back. "Be my guest because that would be a pretty interesting show."

Tamara had a point.

Tamara had a point and it infuriated Belle.

She hated this shitty situation where she could only be helpless and watch as the machines' beeping reached a crescendo and Regina's head lolled forward. It was like Belle was seeing events unfold in a daze.

Assistants came by to unstrap Regina only to strap her down again but this time onto a stretcher. They took her away. Belle didn't know if she wanted to stay with the wolf or go after Regina and see where they were going to take her because wasn't she supposed to go home after this?

The wolf was whimpering, but she could move now, albeit on shaky, unsteady legs.

Through the fog overwhelming Belle as she tried to process so many things going on all at once, Dr. Gold came over.

"If you can't find it in yourself to behave like a professional, then there might not be a place for you here." Dr. Gold's voice was low and cold and threatening. "We'll talk tomorrow. I need to think about what to do with you."

The words sounded chilling given what she now knew what this man was capable of.

"But I think you should leave."

Belle looked over at the wolf. She was regaining her strength and starting to growl and pull again.

" _Now_." Dr. Gold said. "Come back tomorrow. At noon, or afternoon."

There was that intense temptation again to retort or lash out or do anything other than stand by and watch. But she felt Tamara's eyes, almost goading Belle to make a scene.

Swallowing back the rising anger, Belle nodded. "Yes, sir."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another big chapter that was hard af to write. But here we are. The next one should be when things start moving further along in the Escape Department, I think. I'm still writing and I'm not sure if I'll be able to post it promptly tomorrow since I've got my cousins sleeping over tonight. So we'll see. As always, all the comments I get give me life.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm dehydrated and a little hungover so this chapter might have more typos than usual.
> 
> In other news, did you know that Meghan ISNT taller than Rob? Like they're just about the same height with Rob being taller by just a tiny fraction aND THAT WEIRDS ME OUT BECAUSE I ALWAYS THOUGHT SHE WAS TALLER?! But yeah. Because this is fanfiction, I can decree that RUBY IS TALLER THAN GOLD. Because why not.
> 
> Also… this chapter… has some nice safe scenes. But then y'know, this is Dr. Gold and 204's world and there has to be at least one scene between them that'll hurt like a bitch. I legit had a hard time writing it and you'll probs have a hard time reading it. But it brings Gold to an idea that leads to some events planned in a succeeding chapter. That and it shows how far Gold's mind has gotten into a screwed up state.
> 
> But if abuse is a trigger for you and you've made it this far, it's a scene that might hit close, so just take care of yourself and be careful.

* * *

The fog in her head was pressing against the inside of her skull and she felt dazed. It was hard to process what was going on. Hard to process her situation. Hard to figure out what she was supposed to do now.

After about an hour (that felt like several) of driving aimlessly, Belle stopped the car on the side of the road.

What was she doing?

What did she get herself into?

She had signed up for an internship at Baelfire Research Center so she could learn more about gifted individuals. She had hoped to find connections between mental illness and mental disorders and supernatural ability. She had hoped to _help_ people.

Instead, she found herself in a mess she could not bring herself to walk away from.

Belle pinched the bridge of her nose and grit her teeth as the fog started to fade away and she was again blasted by everything all at once.

She saw Emma staying connected to 204 until she was on the verge of collapse and had to be sedated. Saw the pain that coursed through both Emma and 204. When Dr. Gold was electrocuting 204 and when 204's transformation started. The color draining from Regina's face as Dr. Gold pressured her to maintain control of the wolf.

The second-hand emotions crashed over her as well. Emma's fear and anger. Regina's distress.

Burying her head in her hands, Belle groaned. The memories were tormenting her as well and she didn't know how the others had the strength to carry such heavy burdens with them. She remembered the memories that Regina shared of her father's death. The memories 204 dwelled on of the boy and the girl and the ill-fated classroom.

204's deep, intense pain hit like a truck and Belle found herself pounding a fist against the steering wheel.

She was going to burn the entire facility to the ground if she had to.

There was no way in hell she was going to allow 204, Emma and Regina spend a day longer than necessary in that godforsaken torture chamber.

Wiping at her nose and eyes, Belle knew she couldn't do it alone. She took several deep breaths to regain her composure and pulled out her phone. She needed to talk to someone about everything because keeping it bottled up would only drive her insane.

Then she remembered that it was 3:45am and would be a ridiculously rude time to call anyone. She could send Mulan a text at least and hope the guard wasn't going to wake up to the notification and get irritable.

"Hi.. Can we meetup for lunch today to talk? Sorry I'm texting so early. I hope this didn't wake you up."

After looking over the text a few times, Belle nodded to herself and sent it.

Now what?

She still felt like she needed someone to talk to and Papa might not understand and Belle really didn't feel like going home just yet. She didn't want to sleep and was pretty sure she _couldn't_ sleep, not with how wound up she was feeling.

Well who else had trouble sleeping?

Berating herself for how rude this was going to be, Belle called Aurora.

At the first ring, Belle was supposed to just cancel the call and tell herself off for being so impulsive and wasn't that a symptom of lack of sleep? Impaired judgement and lack of self control.

But before the second ring could even finish its tune, Aurora's voice came in clearly over the speakers. "Belle?"

"Hi." Belle rubbed at her temples, "Sorry if I woke you-"

"I was already awake." Aurora interrupted. "Had some weird dreams again. What's up?"

"I…" Belle hesitated. "I… It's been a bit of a rough night and I feel like I could use a friend."

A little less than a year ago, Belle would have called Ariel to hang out and talk and figure things out. But Ariel moved back home after they graduated and it wasn't always easy to stay in touch given how busy they'd both been lately. That and Ariel's work at the Dyad Institute was pretty demanding.

"Is it because of those tests you and Tamara were supposed to be doing with Dr. Gold?"

Belle bit her lip, hesitating again over how much to tell Aurora and whether or not it was a good idea. "I know this is going to come off really rude and totally ridiculous." She ran her fingers through her hair. "But I'm on a high from lacking sleep and my inhibitions are crashing and burning."

"This isn't what I think it's about, is it?" Aurora asked. "I mean I don't recall telling you about being bi, but I don't feel particularly inclined to say yes if this is a booty call, Belle. No offense."

A laugh burst out of Belle and she found herself releasing it and just letting go for a lot longer than was comfortable or normal.

"Uh… Is it really that funny?"

Laughing felt good even if it was for such an absurd reason.

"Belle, are you okay?"

"Wooh." Belle finally managed to compose herself and settle the giggles trying to bubble out of her. "Okay. Sorry. Um… no, that's not what I called you for. Not that I don't think you're attractive. But I think we're great platonically. As is."

She smacked herself in the forehead for being an awkward duck. Is this really how she was going to degrade after being wound up for close to forty-eight hours? She had just barely managed to get her fitful sleep at home yesterday. And that was probably the last time she had any rest.

"Belle." Aurora was calm, but Belle sensed that she was thoroughly weirded out. "Where are you? I think I can hear cars."

"Uh…" Belle watched a few cars pass by. There weren't a lot at this time of night. Or morning, rather. "Close to some intersection, on the side of the road."

"I thought you'd be at Baelfire." Aurora sounded concerned now. "Did you get pulled over? Or was there some accident?"

"No!" Belle shook her head even if Aurora couldn't see it. "I'm just… really… _really_ overwhelmed right now." The tightness in her throat was back as her thoughts brought her back to the tortured girl whose only name was 204. "And I don't know what to do."

"I'll come meet you so we can talk."

It took a bit of fumbling with waze and several GPS apps until Belle and Aurora were able to find a Pizza Planet branch between their locations and close enough to the facility for Aurora to make it to work on time.

By the time they were both at Pizza Planet, it was 5:10 am and the staff were barely awake and itching for their night shift to end.

Belle ordered the four-cheese triceraton pizza with extra cheese and extra meatballs because she was dying for something greasy, cheesy and meaty even if that wasn't her usual preference. Aurora got something with pineapples.

Digging into the pizza felt amazing and it took a moment for Belle to realize that Aurora was watching.

Wiping her mouth and hoping she didn't have cheese all over her face, Belle straightened up. "Right… uh…"

"Are you okay?" Aurora asked. "You seem… off."

"I want to tell you." Belle said, "But I'm not sure where to start or how to get you to understand."

"Would it help if I talked first or do you want some quiet time to collect your thoughts?"

Belle thought over the question before taking another bite of her pizza, making an effort to be neater and more poised about it this time. She chewed for a bit before swallowing and answering, "You could talk first if you want."

After eating a bit of her own pizza, Aurora straightened up. "Okay, you know how I mentioned I had weird dreams again?"

Belle nodded.

"You were in them."

That hadn't been what Belle expected to hear.

"Yeah." Aurora leaned forward on the table. "I don't know, I guess I was thinking about you before sleeping or maybe worrying about you because you've been pretty stressed since the other day. And I was thinking about that girl you said you saw some files on."

"Okay…" Belle put away her pizza to better concentrate on what Aurora was saying. "And what was happening? In your dream?"

"It was… weird." Aurora said. "I saw you and this guard pinning you down on a table and I felt like I wanted to help but I didn't know how."

The soreness in her shoulder seemed renewed by the memory of that event and Belle unconsciously rolled it.

"And I saw Emma and Regina, sitting on these chairs… and there was this other girl. Shaved head, sharp cheekbones, like… her face was gaunt and she looked starved."

Belle couldn't help but widen her eyes as Aurora went on.

"I couldn't understand what was going on, and I couldn't hear the voices, or I don't remember what any of the voices were saying." Aurora rubbed at her forehead. " I just remember feeling this… this _fear_ that everyone was feeling."

She laughed to shake off the discomfort that bubbled up from sharing her dream. "Weird, right? I mean… it's not that weird but it… it felt… I don't know. I felt really… like I was _there_."

"Did anything else happen?" Belle asked.

"There was a commotion and my memory of the dream gets hazy or maybe I woke up." Aurora was frowning as she tried to recall the dream. "But I remember watching the girl with the shaved head… I saw her in pain and then I saw…"

Aurora shook her head. "Nevermind, it's stupid."

"What happened?" Belle pressed.

"She…" Aurora fiddled with her hair. "She turned into a wolf."

"What color?"

"What does it matter?" Aurora was uncomfortable now and she leaned back against her seat and avoided eye contact.

"Aurora," Belle was the one leaning forward on the table now. "What color was the wolf?"

Still avoiding eye contact, Aurora mumbled. "Black. Or dark brown. I'm not sure." She turned to face Belle. "Why are you so interested though? It's just some weird dream. I must have been binging Stranger Things and Teen Wolf too closely."

"Aurora…" Belle wasn't sure how best to say it, "I think you were there last night."

Waving her hand dismissively, Aurora looked out the window. "It was just a dream."

"No, it wasn't." And it was _phenomenal_! "Aurora, the girl. When you saw her on the chair, she was wearing a gown, right? Pale, kind of greenish?"

That got Aurora's attention and her head turned to face Belle so fast, her hair swatted the back of the booth seat. "How…?"

"And when you dreamt of her again," Belle continued. "Just before the girl turned into a wolf. She.. She was _undressed_ , right?"

Aurora's brow was furrowed and she looked like she was torn somewhere between disbelief and distress. "That can't be… That… Did it all just… That can't…" She shook her head. "Belle, you're pulling my leg."

"I'm not!" Belle insisted. "You were there last night!"

"But how?" Aurora's voice was rising and the two other people at the tables turned to look at them. After that, Aurora made an effort to lower her voice. "I can't have been there if I was at home last night. I don't sleepwalk. I would know, I tried filming myself in my sleep once."

"You did research on sleep and the supernatural, right?" Belle lowered her voice. "Didn't you research Astral Projection?"

"I…" Aurora fidgeted. "Yeah, a little bit."

Belle was mentally going over how best to explain to Aurora the mess of events last night when she noticed the time displayed on her phone. 6:35am. Aurora still needed time to travel to the facility and then time in and freshen up and prepare for the morning research session with Jane and whatever scientist would be assigned to keep an eye on them for the morning.

"Okay, let's do this." Belle said, planning on the spot, which she'd never really done before. "I'm hoping to meet up with someone over lunch to… talk about something related to this. Maybe the three of us can meet here? During your lunch break? Then we can clear things up and make sense of what's going on."

There was a doubtful look on Aurora's face, but she eventually nodded.

* * *

Parties were never her forte, especially not when Mother was always so difficult to talk to when it came to being out at night.

But this was _the_ party to be at. The seniors were throwing a big pool bash in Katheryn Nolan's house and anyone who was anyone was going. Said host was already dancing by the pool with her star quarterback, Jim. This was the send-off before the seniors all moved out or started working or went to their chosen universities.

Supposedly, all the seniors were going. And that wasn't a stretch to believe. Besides the familiar faces of the popular kids and the athletes and the cheerleaders and the student leaders, those that kind of hung in the background were there. Hanging around by the corner were the Chinese twins who usually kept to themselves but sometimes got into fights with the popular kids. Further off was Ashley and Sean. They were kind of blacklisted and given a wide berth, but they were there. Pregnant belly and all.

It was strange and overwhelming seeing so many people dancing and laughing and talking and _drinking_.

As a freshman, it was huge to be invited into one of these parties, but Peter was an athlete with connections and got them the invite. And as for getting permission from Mother? He had been gracious and respectful even if she really didn't like him and was quite clear about that. She eventually relented on the condition that her daughter be home by midnight. And no drinking. And Peter's friend better be sober when they all carpool home.

Linking arms with Peter, she leaned into him for security. The noise and the lights and the smells were a lot more than she was used to and she was starting to feel overwhelmed.

"You alright, love?" He turned to face her and planted a kiss on her cheek.

"Yeah," She answered. "This is just… different."

Dorothy, who had managed to tag along, was hanging back, uncomfortable and out of place. "Should we like… grab some… food…? Or something?"

"Yeah, we could." Peter nodded and led the way through the crowd in the backyard and into the massive living room until they got to the kitchen with its decorated counters and shiny barstools. There were red cups and chips and pasta and barbecue.

She went straight for the barbecue.

"Always the meatlover, I see." Peter teased, but there was a fondness to it.

She would have smiled and given him a playful nudge, but then she saw how Dorothy was still standing uncomfortably. Awkward and uneasy. Hugging herself and glancing around.

"You okay, Kansas?"

Dorothy shrugged, then tried to hide her discomfort under a teasing smirk. "I'm just here, your totally ignored third wheel. Nothing new, right?"

"You could join us, if you want." Peter took a few steps back but kept his hands on her shoulders. "Look, now there's space for you to squeeze in between us."

"Ha, ha." Dorothy waved a dismissive hand. "I'm not straight enough for that, bro."

Peter put a hand to his chest and put on a dramatic look of pain and offense. "Oooh, that hurts."

She ruffled Peter's perfectly gelled hair and turned to Dorothy. "Why don't you go find Merida? My sources tell me she's going to be here."

Dorothy blushed then. "Shut up, Wolfie! We don't know if she's into girls."

"Being in the softball team isn't enough proof for you?" She said the words in a teasing tone, then when Dorothy just shook her head doubtfully, a change in tactics was necessary. "Okay look, I was talking to Lottie last week and you know how she has the dirt on pretty much everyone."

"Uhhuh?"

"Merida's got an ex named Astrid back home. Things didn't end too well and Astrid left her for some dude who rides horses. Haddock was his name, I think." She had done her research thoroughly and she wanted Dorothy to be happy. There was a part of her that _did_ feel a twinge of… _jealousy_ maybe? At the thought of Dorothy warming up to Merida… or _anyone_ for that matter. But she knew she couldn't afford to entertain that thought. The best she could do was find someone who could make Dorothy the happy person she deserved to be.

"Interesting." Dorothy leaned against the kitchen doorway and seemed to be mulling over the new information. Then she looked over at her friend. "You did all that research? Did you bribe Lottie for that kind of intel?"

Leaning into Peter, she just gave Dorothy a coy smile. "The things I do for my best friend."

"Oooh, are you hogging the ladies in the kitchen, Peteyboy?" Keith came into the doorway and his eyes lit up at the sight of them. There was a can in his hand and he tossed it towards the trash bin, missing entirely. "Can't I have one of them maybe?"

"Keith, man, can you not?" Peter had let go of her now and was moving towards Keith, who was positioning himself uncomfortably close to Dorothy.

"Why not?" Keith's voice was husky and slurred as he put a hand against the doorframe above Dorothy's head leaned in towards her.

Without really thinking about it, she gave in to her anger and before she knew what was happening, she and Keith were on the ground and she was on top of Keith and she was raising her fist and she was glaring at him and her eyes were warm and she felt pure rage and an overpowering urge to hurt this threat.

"What the _fuck_?" Keith's slurred voice was riddled with anger.

"Wolfie, take it easy." A hand was on her shoulder and she allowed herself to be pulled off of Keith. "It's not worth it. Let's just go somewhere else, okay?"

The anger was still boiling through her and she had to close her burning eyes and try to calm herself and steady her breathing. Granny always said it was dangerous to get angry. Mother said that Granny was a serial killer because she got angry at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Mother always said that they shouldn't be letting themselves get so emotional.

But it was hard. She always felt like her emotions were in control. More than her thoughts, sometimes.

"That bitch!" Keith was livid as he stood up, only to be stopped by Peter's hand on his chest.

"Dude, just let it go." Peter's voice was low and warning, despite the noticeable size difference between the two boys. Keith towered over Peter but Peter refused to back down. "Katheryn won't like any fights breaking out in her kitchen."

Huffing, Keith grabbed another beer and stomped off.

* * *

Her head felt foggy and heavy, and she felt irrationally irritable.

Belle may or may not have fallen asleep in the parking lot, but it was hard to remember. She was going over the files she had of 204, Regina and Emma and looking for something that could inspire a plan. She had also tried drawing a rough layout of the facility but the lines she'd drawn onto her tablet were shaky and it probably wasn't too scale.

Now, she was back at Pizza Planet, and could barely remember ordering a Margherita Spaceship Pizza, much less eating half of it.

Aurora was the first to arrive and took the booth seat across Belle's. "Hi, sorry if I kept you waiting. Dr. Whale was late today, and he was really irritable. Snapped at me and Jane a few times. He said Emma and Regina aren't available for testing today, so we just did some researching and transcribing."

"Of course that asshole is going to take last night out on you and Jane." The words left her mouth before she could stop them and she had to rub her face several times and try to get a fucking grip.

"Belle?" Aurora's voice was laced with concern. "Have you had any sleep?"

Shaking her head, Belle leaned over to move a milkshake closer to herself. She took a sip and again, had no recollection of ordering strawberry. "I might have dozed off or had some microsleep in the car after you left. And I guess I was able to sleep a little yesterday morning when Papa insisted I should sleep."

Of course a pizza place with a spaceship theme wouldn't have any tea, so she ordered her third cup of coffee.

Aurora's jaw was set like she was trying to stop herself from saying something.

"What?" Belle snapped despite herself. "You said you barely sleep either and I know your thermos is always full of coffee."

That hit Aurora and she tensed up. "If you invited me for lunch just to be rude, I'd rather eat in the pantry at Baelfire."

"Wait, no!" Belle rubbed at her face again and ran her fingers through her hair. "Sorry. I'm sorry. I did not mean that."

"Okay, I know lacking sleep can make a person pretty irritable," Aurora was frustrated but she looked like she was trying to calm herself down. "But please at least _try_ not to take it out on me. Jane and I got enough of that from Dr. Whale this morning. Okay?"

"Okay." Belle said, subdued. "I'm sorry."

"So what did you call me in the middle of the night for? You never really got to explain that." Aurora said, "Because I know it wasn't so we could exchange dreams."

"Your dream though," Belle winced at the pounding in her head but shifted in her seat and tried to keep going. "It has something to do with what happened last night. Because I think you dreamt exactly about what happened last night."

"What, are you saying I was using some form of astral projection and my dream was real?"

Belle nodded, then regretted how it made her head feel foggier and heavier.

"The girl that they chained up, that turned into a wolf." Belle said, "They call her 204. Emma tried to get a name out but couldn't."

That wasn't exactly relevant information.

Suppressing a groan and fighting back the urge to rub at her forehead again, Belle continued. "The point is that what you saw last night… the torture and abuse of that poor girl… that was real and I was there and I couldn't do anything and it's awful and I feel sick." There was a churning in her stomach again and she had to swallow back the tightness in her throat.

"But Dr. Gold and Dr. Whale and Dr. Hopper…" Aurora shook her head in disbelief. "Would Dr. Gold really do that? Electrocute those two and just… just hurt them like that?"

The sadistic, mad gleam in Dr. Gold's eyes still haunted Belle.

And his cold tone last night when he told her to leave.

Just as Belle was looking for the right set of words to respond, the doors burst open and Mulan came stomping in. She was in jeans now, but her boots were still heavy and loud. The leather jacket she wore was the same, with red lining the shoulders and some gold studs accenting the sleeves and collar. Her short hair wasn't in its usual tight bun and in this dazed and foggy state, Belle accidentally stared at and admired how the dark strands framed Mulan's strong jaw.

"Hi, sorry I'm late." She dumped a heavy book on the table and then sat next to Aurora. "I was digging up some old stuff because something was bothering me and it kept me from settling down."

"Okay, one of you explain what's going on." Aurora said, "Because I don't recall signing up for some Insomniac Club."

Mulan looked surprised and turned to face Belle. "I thought she was in on it?"

"I… was working on easing her into it."

"Into what?"

"Into figuring out what to do to help Regina, Emma and 204." Belle said. "After last night, I can't just stand by and let them be tortured in there for the rest of their lives."

Mulan's eyebrows shot up. "Okay, I did not sign up for some sort of mad escape plan."

"But you _are_ worried about 204, aren't you? And Emma and Regina?"

Rubbing the back of her head, Mulan sighed. "Yes, I am."

"Okay, let's try to take this a step back first." Belle rubbed at her head with shaky hands then leaned against the table, wincing as it agitated her stiff shoulder. "We don't have to talk about any escape plans or anything like that. Let's just lay our cards on the table."

" _What cards_?" Aurora's voice was tight and tense, "I just had a dream last night about mad scientists and werewolves. I didn't think any of it was actually _real_!"

Mulan stared at Aurora while she vented, then turned to Belle. "What? I mean really. _WHAT_?"

This was making her head hurt like a bitch and Belle was doing her best to keep herself from snapping. She took a few deep breaths before speaking. "Okay. Here's the thing. Aurora may have the ability of Astral Projection because her supposed dream last night completely matches up to my experience at Baelfire before Dr. Gold told me to go home."

"Okay…" Aurora still seemed hesitant to believe.

"Mulan over here is a guard who is sometimes assigned to watch 204." Belle said. "And I know for a fact that she is sympathetic towards 204 and disapproves of her treatment."

Mulan folded her arms together and leaned on the table. "And I still don't know how you know that."

"Emma has an undocumented ability to…" Belle searched for the right word and massaged her head as if that would help ease it out. "To… let's say facilitate… or no. _Transport_ someone into someone else's mind. And she dumped me in yours, Mulan. And I saw you sneaking food to 204."

"What?" Mulan's jaw dropped, then she shook her head. " _WHAT_?"

It may have been wiser to keep her cards close and not just spill everything out to two people she wasn't completely sure could be trusted just yet. But Belle was groggy and tired and cranky and she just wanted to figure out what to do next.

"Can you at least ask for my consent maybe?" Mulan said. "Next time you're squatting inside my brain?"

"Fair enough." Belle said.

"And what about you?" Aurora asked. "What's your part in all this?"

"Me?" Belle clasped her hands on the table but that did little to ease the trembling. "I managed to win Dr. Gold over enough for him to let me observe tests being run on 204 the other night. It was brutal and cruel and I didn't like it. He brought in Tamara last night and she had these awful suggestions and she acted like none of the subjects were human beings."

Stiffling a yawn, Belle bent over to rifle through her bag and pulled out the folder where she'd been keeping 204's files. "Here, Aurora. You can go over these to get a better feel of 204."

That wasn't right.

"Well… a more _clinical_ view of her anyway." Belle scrunched up her eyes and willed the fog away, but it wasn't working. She opened her eyes as Aurora read through the file while Mulan peeked over her shoulder. "They see her as an animal. _Less_ than animal almost. She's an experiment to them. But she had a name. She had a life. She was in high school before they brought her here. There was…"

Belle fought the tightness in her throat. "She thinks about the boy she loved and the girl she was afraid to love. She thinks a lot about how she lost control and… and _killed_ them. And that seems to affect her very deeply. She's tormented and tortured and guilty and in pain."

The tightness made it hard to speak and Belle had to shift in her seat and collect herself.

"Would you know where she went to high school?" Mulan asked.

Belle shrugged. "That's not in her file, and her memories aren't that specific."

"I…" Mulan pursed her lips. "I have an idea. It's crazy and I'm not sure. But… maybe." She reached over the heavy book she'd dumped on the table and Belle realized it was a yearbook, with Storybrooke High emblazoned on the cover.

"I wasn't sure," Mulan opened it and rifled through the pages. "But I don't know. You two can judge if you think it's the same person."

They swiped through several pages, glossed over a much younger Mulan next to her brother. "Yeah, Shang and I are twins. He's assigned to some mall and he hates it."

Finally, they came to the section featuring the high school freshmen.

And there, right along the row of students whose last names ended in L.

That was the very same person. She was younger, happier, full of life. Long brown hair framed her face, with some red streaks and tips that awkwardly looked like they were done by herself and not a parlor. Her cheekbones weren't jutting out the way they did now. There was still a softness to her face, but it was long like 204's, with big green eyes and a narrow nose and a wide mouth.

With shaky hands, Belle took 204's file from Aurora and put it next to the girl's picture.

There was probably a good year or two gap between the pictures because her cheeks and jaw were more pronounced in 204's file. But it was the same girl. It _had_ to be. The same long, narrow face. The same wide eyes. The same thin, pointed nose. The same long neck.

That was 204.

And her name was _Ruby Lucas_.

"It _is_ her!" Mulan looked taken aback and sank into the booth. "I thought… I thought she seemed familiar but I just… I wasn't sure."

Mulan's voice was wavering and she pressed her forehead against her hand, grasping at her own hair. "We never talked, really. I was graduating while she was a freshman. We just never really crossed paths."

"Ruby Lucas." Belle tried the name out, and wished she knew more about this girl. Knew more about how she went from that smiling freshman with the biggest grin to ever grin to the scared girl in 204's file, to the broken young woman in Baelfire.

Setting her jaw and avoiding eye contact, Mulan looked towards the arcade area. "I vaguely knew of her because she was dating one of the rising athletes. It wasn't major news because they weren't too popular yet. You know how high school is."

"What happened to her?" Aurora asked.

Mulan sighed and turned to look at them. Her dark eyes were shiny and her brow was furrowed and her jaw was clenched. It was like she was trying to compose herself enough to figure out the right words, but she shook her head.

"Emma helped me see some of her memories." Belle said. "Of a classroom."

That got a nod from Mulan, and she swallowed visibly. Her voice was soft when she spoke again. "It happened while Shang and I had already graduated. Two years after, I guess. We heard this rumor about some sort of massacre at Storybrooke High."

Belle saw that Mulan's hands were trembling no matter how hard she clasped them together and tried to still them.

"The rumors were that some girl went wild and killed several students and a teacher. And injured almost everyone in that room. Some rumors said she acted like some kind of animal." Mulan breathed in and out to steady herself. "The news reports that came after said it was a school shooting. And the girl who did it had killed herself."

It felt like a blow to the gut as Belle realized that as far as the world was concerned, _Ruby Lucas was dead_.

A heavy silence fell over their table as they took time to process the new information Mulan had just uncovered.

Vibrating in her pocket and her musical ringtone caught Belle's attention and she pulled out her phone to see that Papa was calling.

Belle wasn't in the mood to explain what was going on or why she wasn't home yet. She declined the call and told herself to just text him later, maybe lie about sleeping in the facility since driving home tired was a risk.

"What made you dig this up now?" Aurora was leaning back against her seat, a troubled expression on her face.

Mulan's smile was forced and uncomfortable. "Funny enough, it was a weird train of thought." She brushed back her dark hair and steadied her voice. "Among us guards, we kind of notice that the rookies usually need time to adjust to what they see. I don't think I've ever adjusted to it and Gaston probably has an idea about how I feel about what goes down in there."

"Go on." Belle wasn't quite sure where this was going.

"And when you confronted me yesterday." Mulan looked at Belle. "I felt kind of like comparing you to a rookie who hadn't adjusted yet. Then it got me thinking about my own first time at the facility. Then I kind of just… found myself thinking about high school and how I used to pick fights with some of the asshole kids that bullied the helpless kids. And it sank in that I am in the _same_ world."

Mulan tapped on the table, hard. "Right now. It's the _same damn thing._ We have the asshole scientists picking on the helpless subjects."

"Then you kind of just made the possible connection?" Aurora asked.

Mulan nodded, then looked at Belle. "I don't want to stand and watch anymore, but we need a plan. This isn't like those movies where we can just go in guns a-blazing. We have to figure out the loopholes and blindspots."

More excited than was probably appropriate, Belle pulled out her tablet and showed them the rough sketch she'd scribbled of the layout of the facility.

The sight of it made Mulan cringe. "Okay. Uh. I think you should let me handle that. I have a map in my locker from when I was new because I kept getting lost on my first few days."

"Wait," Aurora spoke up again. "Are we really planning to just… just break out their subjects? One of them being one of their most classified, protected cases?"

Belle exchanged a glance with Mulan. "Are you alright with that? We won't force you to take part if you don't want to." She tried to hold it back, but it slipped out. "Although your astral projection could be _really_ useful if you were part of this thing."

Aurora bit her lip.

"I've spent four years working there and the way they treat 204," Mulan licked her lips and corrected herself, "The way they treat _Ruby_ … it's getting worse and worse. And I don't know how much more of it she can take."

"I think…" Belle cringed as she recalled what it was like to think and feel like 204. To think and feel like _Ruby_. "She's been hanging on this long because she doesn't think she deserves to die."

That weighed heavily on them for a moment, until Aurora broke the silence. "Okay. I'm in."

* * *

Back in her quarters in her gown and her chains, the subject was curled up under the bed, chin resting on her arm.

The voices in her head last night had been strange and invasive and she didn't quite like it.

She couldn't understand if it was some sort of test.

They had been so insistent- in abstract emotion and concrete thought- that she wasn't the monster she knew she was. They tried to feed her images of solidarity when she knew she deserved isolation. They had told her she didn't deserve her fate when she knew a murderous monster deserved nothing less.

Her stomach rumbled and she remembered her last meal must have been scraps of meat while she was a wolf.

There were moments where she and the wolf sometimes shared memories. She recalled the way she couldn't move. The way her spine was being pushed down and her arms were being pulled forward and it was like her muscles were contracting and moving against her will and it was frightening and painful.

Would that be happening again tonight?

Would Emma be there again tonight?

The subject snorted.

It was better if Emma wasn't there. She was trying to shoulder some of the subject's pain without actually having the pain threshold of a monster.

Emma didn't deserve the pain of a monster.

 _They_ all deserved better. The subject could feel the hardships faced by Emma and Regina. They were connected and tired and scared and drew strength from each other.

Belle had been angry. Belle had been worried. Belle had wanted to save the subject.

The subject did _not_ need saving.

The door to her quarters slid open and the subject poked her head out from under the bed, hoping for a meal but expecting a new test.

What she saw instead was Dr. Gold, holding his prod and closing the door behind him.

"204," Dr. Gold's voice was low and he tapped the prod against his palm. "Come out of there."

She was so used to machines beeping whenever her heartbeat picked up that the quiet was earie and hearing her own heart was unnerving. It pounded in her ears as she pulled herself out from under the bed with trembling arms.

"There we go."

His voice was different today. It was cold and angry and not like the lighter tone he liked to use with her when she was cooperating with his tests. The subject crouched by the bed and looked up at him, scared and uncertain.

"Stand."

The subject swallowed and slowly stood up on shaky legs until she was looking down at him.

"204, when you first came in here, do you remember what I told you?" Dr. Gold was using his lighter, friendlier voice now but it did little to alleviate her fear.

She thought back to when she was strapped down to a bed and didn't understand where she. She had also been dazed from sedatives.

"I told you that I was going to find a cure for you." Dr. Gold said, "And as long as you cooperated, we would have a smooth arrangement with no problems."

She nodded, vaguely remembering the gist of that conversation.

He was tapping the prod against his palm.

Something was wrong. She had done something wrong.

She saw the prod coming but she knew better than to react to it, letting it hit the side of her jaw and send her to the floor.

Warmth built up along her jaw as her body healed whatever bruise may have formed. She was thankful that was a blunt blow from the prod and not the electrical shocks that made her spasm and writhe. She looked up at him, waiting for his next move and not daring to do anything.

"Stand."

Her heart was pounding in her ears and in her chest as she unsteadily pushed herself up onto her feet.

"204, these past two nights," Dr. Gold adjusted his grip on the prod and she flinched for a blow that didn't come. "I don't believe you've been particularly cooperative."

 _I'm sorry_. The words were caught in her throat and she couldn't get them out. She did her best but she knew that she had been difficult. The wolf had needed to be punished for its misbehavior. The subject had been too slow to calm the argument that broke out last night.

The prod came again, this time from the other side. It hit the side of her face and sent her bumping into the wall and sliding down to the floor.

"Stand."

Her legs were trembling too much, she wasn't sure if she could. It was getting hard to breathe. She wanted to cooperate but her body wasn't moving.

"204." Dr. Gold's footsteps echoed in her head as he moved to stand over her. " _Stand_."

She tried. Her legs gave way under her and her body was trembling too much and she couldn't breathe and she heard the chains drag against the floor as she curled up into a ball and buried her face in her arms.

A blow came down on her shoulders. Another across her ribs. Her body would heat up and heal any bruises before they could properly form.

"I had with me a brilliant scientist," He accentuated every blow with a swing of the prod, using it like a stick and beating her with it and her body healed from every blow but her breathing was only making her chest get tighter and tighter. "She was budding with potential. She was sharp. She was thorough."

She couldn't breathe and her chest was tight and her eyes were warm.

She had to fight it.

"Now, she's on the verge of quitting."

Then the shocks came.

She felt electricity coursing through her body, burning through her shoulder. It was hard to breathe and hard to stay still and she thrashed and screamed.

"I can see it in her eyes. She's angry and she wants to leave."

There was a pause.

The subject struggled to catch her breath. Her entire body was trembling and hot and cold and her skull was splitting and her eyes were burning up.

"She could have been useful to me. I could have trained her. She had the potential to lead our research forward with her ideas."

Another jolt of electricity burned through her and all she knew in that moment was pure agony as she squirmed and struggled to get away but her body wasn't listening to her and she was trapped and suffering and terrified.

Then it stopped.

She was breathing heavily. Her claws were out and her teeth were forcing their way through her gums.

"Because of you, she despises me and I don't know how to convince her to stay."

A turmoil of emotions were going through the subject as she fought to stay in control of herself and keep the wolf from coming out. She wanted to apologize and try to fix it, try to be more cooperative and obedient and quiet during tonight's tests.

But she also wanted to get angry and lash out and tell him that she did her best and she was frustrated that none of it was good enough.

That was the wolf talking.

It _had_ to be.

She _deserved_ this treatment.

"204." He was tapping the prod against his palm. " _Stand_."

Digging her claws into her palms until they bled, she forced herself to stand despite the tightness in her chest that made her breathe deeply and raggedly. Her legs were shaky and her stomach was churning and her head felt heavy, but she managed to get herself to straighten up.

"You're jeopardized this operation by driving her away." Dr. Gold swung again, this time bring it solidly across her stomach, knocking out what little wind was left in her and sending her crumpling back to the floor.

The anger was building up and she wasn't sure how much longer she could fight it.

If she could just say the words. If she could just properly apologize, maybe he would stop and she wouldn't have to keep fighting the wolf trying to come out.

"It's all your damn fault, 204." He lifted the prod to strike again and this time, she couldn't control herself.

Before it could come down, she moved faster, lashing out with a clawed hand and striking him across the cheek and sending him across the room.

She was growling and angry and she moved towards him, lunged for him only to reach the ends of her chains. Pulling and jerking did little to change the fact that the chains were now pulled taut and Dr. Gold was completely out of reach.

He was crouched down and blood was seeping out of gashes across his cheek, but he didn't look scared.

"That's what I can do." He brought a hand up to his cheek. "If I can't make her see the monster that you are, you can do that yourself."

She growled and tried again to jerk herself forward, but the chains held fast.

Dr. Gold stood up, hand pressed against his cheek as he made his way to the door. "Have a nice day, 204."

The door shut behind him.

* * *

The drive to the facility was a blur.

A lot of things felt like a blur, but Belle made sure that the plan they were developing would not be a blur. Belle had her part to play and Aurora had to find a way to practice and hone her abilities and Mulan had to get her maps as well as put together a schedule of the guard rotations for the next several days. There may be a guard or two they could win over but it was hard to say and Mulan planned to slowly work that out on her own.

As she finished up signing in, Belle caught sight of Dr. Gold talking to a woman.

It took Belle's slow-functioning, sleep-deprived brain some time to register that it was Regina's mother, Cora Mills.

Being careful to attempt to blend into the background, Belle took a seat in the lobby and tried to eavesdrop as they passed. She wanted to know what bullshit lie Dr. Gold was going to feed Regina's mother after he pressured her to use her abilities past the point of collapse.

"So I'll expect you here around the same time tomorrow?" Dr. Gold said, "To finalize the details and your payment?"

"Yes." Mrs. Mills shook Dr. Gold's hand. "Same time tomorrow."

What was _that_ about?

Belle stood up and regretted getting up too fast. Her head felt heavy and the world spun for a bit before settling.

"Dr. Gold," She called and walked over to him, only to be taken aback by the fresh gauze on his cheek. "What happened?"

He winced visibly as he rubbed at the gauze. "204 happened. I was talking to her this morning and she lashed out."

 _Maybe you provoked her._ Belle was frustratingly close to saying it out loud, but she held back, knowing that the part she had to play meant trying to win him over again since further antagonizing him would only make it harder to be of any help to Emma, Regina and 204.

Ruby.

The name was still taking some getting used to after using 204 the past few days. But Belle resolved to refer to this person by her real name and not the number she'd been assigned.

Dr. Gold shrugged when Belle didn't say anything. "Not that I blame her. It's in her nature to be dangerous and aggressive."

A stream of retorts had to be held back and Belle forced herself to put on as apologetic a look as she could muster. "I'm sorry to hear that happen."

"It comes with the job."

Hating how slimy this was going to feel and how this really wasn't how she normally operated, Belle maintained the apologetic expression and made eyecontact with Dr. Gold. "I was thinking… about last night, sir."

A genuine look of surprise crossed over his features.

"I'd like to apologize for my behavior." She had to force herself to think about all the stupid things she'd done in the past when she offended people or said the wrong thing or got too engrossed in her books and fantasy worlds and forgot how to socialize with people in ways that were appropriate. She thought about the guilt she felt when she messed up an interaction. "I shouldn't have been so hotheaded and unprofessional."

Pretending to feel bad about last night when all she felt was anger about it was slimy and gross but she had to keep her priorities straight.

"That's understandable, dearie." Dr. Gold surprised her with his soft, understanding tone. "You must have been overwhelmed by the situation."

Belle nodded, tried not to dwell on how much better this was panning out than she'd thought it would. "Yes, sir. It was a lot to take in."

"I'll tell you what, dearie." Dr. Gold said. "I'll accept your apology and I'll let you have a session today with 204."

It was impossible this time to keep her face from genuinely showing her surprise. "Sir?"

"You're very insistent in trying to form a connection with 204 like you seem to have with Regina." Dr. Gold said, and Belle noticed how he carefully used Regina's name instead of 201. "After some thought, I decided to give you a chance to try that. Today, we'll set up a room where you'll be allowed to sit and talk with 204. Monitored, of course."

Belle was genuinely stunned and couldn't find a way to respond immediately.

"Understand though, Belle." Dr. Gold said, "That you will only be allowed to have your… your _sympathetic_ sessions with 204 during the specific times that we allow and provide. In other sessions, particularly during sessions spearheaded by Tamara or myself or Dr. Whale, you are to follow the protocols provided."

As much as she still couldn't stomach the idea of standing by and watching them torture 204, Belle had to acknowledge that was a better deal than she could have hoped.

"This is a process of trial and error, of course." Dr. Gold said, "That's how science works. But it's possible that having someone that 204 develops an emotional connection with may be key to helping her control her innate urges and impulses."

Belle kept herself from showing the disgust she felt at the thought of being a tool to use to further manipulate Ruby.

"Do we have an understanding?" There was a hint to something more in Dr. Gold's words, and she realized he was probably hoping she wouldn't make an issue of Gaston's rough handling last night. He pointedly glanced at her arm then back up to her face. "Are you comfortable with that arrangement?"

Unable to stop herself from rubbing her shoulder, Belle nodded. "Yes, sir."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew. The scene with Gold was hard to write but I wanted to end it at least somewhat satisfyingly. ALSO WE'RE STARTING TO PUT TOGETHER AN ESCAPE PLAN AWYEA.
> 
> I'm still with le cousins but I thiiink I can start writing the next chapter tonight. I'll see if I can have it up on schedule as usual, but we'll see. I continue to surprise myself with how I've been maintaining a daily schedule for two weeks now, I honestly don't know how long I can ride this high but I'm loving it lol.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol it's 2am, what am I doing with my life.
> 
> in other news go read Konako's story Storybrooke Habitats, it's fantastic

The pounding in her head meant she desperately needed to crash at some point within this century, and the trembling in her hands meant she seriously needed to lay off the coffee she didn't even really like to begin with.

"She is still very likely to transform tonight," Dr. Gold said, "So your session with her shouldn't drag on for too long."

Belle nodded as they went over some files in Dr. Gold's office. They were alone together and a quick glance around showed that there weren't any obvious cameras and Belle didn't feel like dwelling on why that made her so uncomfortable.

Dr. Gold had cleared out some of the clutter on his desk so they could go over some of Ruby's files.

As much as Belle wanted to refer to 204 by her real name, she made sure to be careful and avoid actually saying the name out loud. That had the potential to be traced back to Mulan if there were hidden records of Ruby's high school as well as Mulan's. Which, knowing how thorough this facility was about its files, there probably was.

"I liked last time how you were able to reassure Regina about the intentions of our programs." Dr. Gold said, "You were able to find a connection between the training we give her to control her abilities and her desire to be rid of them."

"Thank you, sir." Belle tried not to stiffen as Dr. Gold leaned in close and brushed against her shoulder as he flipped through some of the paperwork.

"I would like you to try to do something similar for 204." Dr. Gold said, "I sense that she sometimes needs reassurance of our goal to help her control her abilities."

There were records of some of the tests that Ruby had been put through and they ranged from electrocution to near-drowning to endurance tests of running for hours. It was difficult to keep her face relaxed when her stomach kept twisting into knots and her hands continued to tremble.

"Most of your tests, sir." Belle looked at the data noting the levels that showed when Ruby was close to the change and the stimuli needed to trigger that. "Seem to be to see what can trigger the change and how she fights that?"

"Yes, exactly." Dr. Gold said, "There are programs in place that tie in to a lot of this data, but I'd like to see first how we can put together this new one before I discuss any other plans we have for her."

"So basically, you'd like me to more or less… bring up her morale?" Belle asked, not sure if she was correctly understanding what this was to be about. And also not sure how this would be of any help to what seemed like their plans to utterly destroy Ruby, inside and out.

"More or less, yes." Dr. Gold said, "She's been isolated for a few years and we'd like to maybe start socializing her and seeing how having an emotional bond with someone again may have her be more inclined to control her abilities."

"Why?" Belle asked, just barely keeping her voice controlled at the idea of socializing Ruby like she was an aggressive dog. "Hadn't she formed any connection with her _handlers_? Or was that not allowed until now?"

Rubbing at his stubbly chin, Dr. Gold didn't answer right away and Belle worried that maybe she'd let that slip out too accusingly and too aggressively.

"Our protocols generally require us not to form too much of an attachment to the subjects so as not to affect the scientific integrity of our research." Dr. Gold said, then he glanced at Belle and put a hand over hers. "But for you, Belle, we're considering making an exception. The isolation may be holding 204 back from gaining better control of herself."

"What do you want to achieve with her?" Belle forced herself to keep her hand still and resist the urge to pull it away. "In the end? What are all the programs for?"

Dr. Gold was the one to move his hand away as he walked the length of his office then looked over the trinkets and odd decoration.

"There's not a lot I can say about that," Dr. Gold turned around to face Belle. "But 204 is a very fascinating specimen. She's not the first lycanthrope to be brought into this facility, but she is the one that has exhibited the greatest endurance and interestingly enough, has been capable of fighting the shift more than any of our other subjects."

That _great endurance,_ Belle wondered if the actual translation for that is _'she's the only one who lived this long within facility.'_

"She's also grown to be the most docile of all the lycanthrope subjects we've ever had." Dr. Gold continued. "But that hasn't affected how powerful her abilities still are. If we can just find the missing link towards her attainment of full control of her abilities, her kind could be an invaluable asset."

Docile was an interesting word choice. Belle would have picked broken and desolate instead. And she had to fight back the rising disgust at the thought of other lycanthropes that may had been imprisoned here and didn't behave the way these scientists wanted them to behave.

Getting excited, Dr. Gold rubbed his palms together. "Think of how her abilities can be used! The healing, the strength, the endurance, the heightened senses! We have numerous investors very interested in the results of what we can do with 204 and many are impressed by how much she's capable of."

The thought of footage of Ruby being tortured in the name of experimentation made Belle sick as she imagined that footage being shown off to investors. She imagined the gleam in Dr. Gold's teeth as he talked about his latest toy and how docile she was.

"That's _amazing_!" Belle forced herself to say it with a smile and a nod.

"It is," Dr. Gold said, "In the research we've done with her kind, we've already been able to develop several versions of serums that can enhance a person's healing rates. A few hospitals already have some in supply for well-paying patients. We hope to make it a standard treatment option very soon."

Belle allowed her genuine surprise to take over her face then. "And that serum doesn't pass on any side effects? Like the whole transforming thing?"

Dr. Gold was practically glowing at being able to talk about this to someone who didn't already know, "We've been studying and developing the serums for the better part of twenty years and were finally able to isolate the cells that heal from the cells that transform and increase aggression."

There was something about him now that was different. Less of the mad scientist inflicting pain and exercising control and more of the genuine researcher trying to make a difference in the world. "We went through animal then human testing and eventually gave the experimental treatment to some volunteers and it was a success!"

Dr. Gold's eyes were almost shiny and Belle suddenly felt torn. "The look on their faces at the end of the treatment was priceless! They were cured when they thought they were going to die!"

"And there's been no side effects? At all?"

"Our first volunteer patient has had no side effect five years after the end of the treatment program." Dr. Gold rifled through one of the drawers in his office and pulled out a picture of a young couple and their baby. He showed it to Belle. "She gave birth last year and the child is normal and healthy. We want to monitor them of course, and they understand the need to make sure no side effects happen, but the boy is fine."

Belle had to lean against Dr. Gold's desk to take in this new information.

"We hope to also see if the strength and the healing can be used for not just illness and injury, but disability." Dr. Gold carefully put the picture back into an envelope and placed it in the drawer. "The paralyzed are a sector we're trying to work with."

It was weird, being reminded that this facility wasn't just for the torture and abuse of human beings. The thought of actual good coming out of this place clashed with the image she'd developed of a pit of evil.

"That's… amazing." She breathed out the words, this time actually meaning it and not sure how to feel about giving acknowledgement to the good they'd done already and the good they continue to hope to do.

"And that's just our more… _civilian_ sectors of research." Dr. Gold said, "There are other programs we're working on involving other sectors. Do you understand why 204 is so important to us?"

But why treat her so horribly?

"I understand her importance." Belle said, trying to be careful with her words despite the fact that filtering things was so difficult after so many hours without sleep. "But what about the other lycanthropes you said you'd tested on?"

"She is the only one within this facility right now." Dr. Gold said. "Although we've taken some samples of the venom and saliva she secretes in case we find ourselves needing to… produce another like her."

"If the serum was being developed for nearly twenty years and 204 has only been here for less than ten," Belle rubbed at her forehead as it throbbed from recalling these numbers, "What difference has she made to the studies? As an individual subject?"

"As a born lycanthrope, like 115 before her," Dr. Gold had come back to join Belle and was rifling through the paperwork again. He pulled out 115's file, and there was noticeably no name on the paper either. "They both have a purity to their blood that was invaluable to us. We were able to deconstruct what we found until we got to the very essence of the healing abilities."

"We were getting very close to a breakthrough before we lost 115." Dr. Gold looked sad for a moment, but not particularly devastated, "And when 204 came into our possession, it provided the boost we needed to our research, particularly since she was much younger and more in her prime."

Belle frowned as she tried to work out a timeline in her head, but her mind was in too much of a fog.

Dr. Gold seemed to notice, so he pulled out a fresh sheet of paper and spelled things out for her. "It was around the 60's to the 70's that we first encountered lycanthropes and word of them in the area. We acquired our first one in the 80's, when I first started working here. The facility was under a different name at the time and wasn't as focused on the supernatural."

 **1960's-1970's** : Rise in spotting of lycanthropes

 **1980's:** Acquired first lyanthropes

Genuinely intrigued by this, Belle watched and listened as Dr. Gold gave an impromptu history lesson.

"Most of the lycanthropes we acquired though were bitten and not born and very out of control. They were difficult to test with and highly uncooperative. It was in the early 2000's when there was a shift in our goals and I was put at the head of a new department focused on studying the supernatural. Then this facility was developed purely to focus on gifteds and cryptids."

 **2000's:** Supernatural department breaks off and Baelfire Research Center is founded

"We acquired 115 in 2003 and that gave us major breakthroughs in our research. Her healing and her abilities were superior to the bitten and out of control lycanthropes we'd encountered before." Dr. Gold said, "It was phenomenal and we were able to reach major milestones in our research for both civilian and military sectors."

 **2003:** Acquired Subject 115; major breakthrough in serum development

Dr. Gold paused then, and he straightened up and looked at Belle, "Interestingly enough, she was quite similar to 204 in how they fight the transformation until the last possible minute. And she was actually quite in control. Which is odd considering that majority of disappearances and killings and bitten lycanthropes from the 80's till the 2000's are attributed to her."

Belle put her shaky hands in her pockets. "Did she have a pack or a family?"

For a moment, Dr. Gold was guarded and spoke carefully, "She did. Arrangements were made for her family. I'd rather not get into that. The gist of it is that her family would be safe and monitored as long as she cooperated."

The urge to press further was there, but Belle wasn't in the mood to try to charm it out of him with charm she didn't really think she had.

"Unfortunately, 115 passed away in 2008." Dr. Gold continued. Belle forced herself to stay quiet and not push at how 115 didn't _pass away_ but was _killed_ by their experiments. "Our serum was just about ready at the time and we had just about the right formula and started testing on animal, then on human subjects."

 **2006:** Serum testing on animals

 **2008** : 115 passes away

 **2009:** Serum testing on humans

"Our first testing on human volunteers had some minor side effects of developing depression and aggression, but no transformations were recorded. It was when we acquired 204 in 2010 that we were able to do a fresh round of testing and sampling. By 2012, we started treatment on volunteer patients with terminal illnesses and all of them were cured and are now living the lives they were meant to live. Which brings us to where we are now, patenting the serum and preparing to make it a standard treatment option."

 **2010** : Subject 204 is acquired; fresh batch of serum samples; more testing

 **2012** : volunteer patients go through the treatment program

 **2014:** select hospitals carry the treatment

 **2018:** the serum is a standard treatment option

"That's our target." Dr. Gold said, "This time next year should see anyone with a terminal illness be able to consider our patented program."

"So that's… as you said," Belle tried to find the right words, "The more civilian side to your research. What other programs are there that 204 is such a big part of?"

Dr. Gold shook his head, "I'm sorry, dearie, that's classified and frankly doesn't need to be a concern to you for now. I just want you to focus on forming a connection with 204 and gently urging her to try harder to gain control of her abilities."

"Yes, sir." Belle wondered if there were programs in place to try and weaponize Ruby's abilities, but decided against pressing Dr. Gold for that kind of information. He didn't seem ready to share it anyway.

Instead, she gave in to the nagging question at the back of her mind, "How are Emma and Regina?"

The glow over Dr. Gold faded and he now looked more guarded, "They've stabilized but need to rest. I prefer you see them tomorrow or another day instead."

As much as worry nagged at Belle, she didn't want to push any harder than she should. Mulan had emphasized that getting back in Dr. Gold's good graces should be the priority.

"Yes, sir."

* * *

They were having dinner. It was one of those good nights with no headaches and no yelling.

But something was still off. Granny was tense and Mother also seemed tense. The smell of their fear was hovering over the table as they ate their burgers. It was difficult to understand what was going on but by now she knew better than to ask questions out of turn. If they wanted to explain something to her, they would. Otherwise it wasn't something she needed to know and despite her curiosity, she had learned to accept that way of things.

Besides, it was disrespectful to push and prod for answers. Mother didn't like it at all. Granny was more welcoming but she had moments of being cranky and snappy as well.

There was a knock on the door and that's when Granny gave Mother _the look_. "Take her to her room."

Mother nodded and she took her daughter by the hand and brought her to her room, which was still messy since she hadn't cleaned it yet since she didn't know they were expecting guests tonight.

"I'm sorry, I forgot to clean my room, I can-"

"Ssh!" Mother pressed a finger to her lips, "Don't worry about that right now. I'm going to need you to do something for me and Granny, okay?"

She nodded, eager to make Mother and Granny happy. "I'll do anything, Mother!"

Mother smiled then, "I'm going to need you to hide under the bed and stay there. Just like before."

The smile faded. Hiding under the bed almost meant something scary was going to happen outside. Usually, when she had to hide under the bed, angry dogs would bark and growl from the basement. Recently, she didn't have to hide under the bed anymore and they started playing doctor in the basement since she was six.

Hiding under the bed again was odd. Especially when she was already quite big. She was already _EIGHT_! She was a big girl now and big girls don't hide under their beds when scary things happen, right?

She was about to protest and voice this opinion, but Mother silenced her with a look. "I don't want any arguments. Just hide under the bed like we taught you to."

With a big, loud sigh, she crouched down and crawled under her bed. It was stuffy and dark but oddly familiar. Something about it almost felt safe as she remembered how hiding here protected her from the bad dogs outside.

They didn't even keep any dogs in the house.

"Good girl." Mother was smiling a pleased smile and it felt really good to see that. "Don't come out until we say so. Stay there no matter what you hear. Understood?"

The girl nodded, "Yes, mother."

Satisfied, Mother stood up and her footsteps brought her out of the room and the door closed behind her.

There were voices and talking and it was hard to understand what was going on, but Granny was speaking clearly and repeatedly, "It was me. Neither of them had anything to do with it. I want that to be clear that it was me. I lost control and I don't want my family to suffer the consequences of that."

There was more talking, and it was hard to process any of it, but she could smell that many of them were men.

"I'll cooperate," Granny was saying, "In exchange, my family is to be left alone."

* * *

The subject frowned as the memory passed through her.

She was hiding under the bed again, and thinking about how being in this spot always felt nice and dark and safe. And she wondered about before. About when she would have to hide under the bed when the big dogs would be in the basement. Then they played doctor and the subject had been among the big dogs.

Rubbing at her head, she wondered about the memories.

She wondered how different things would have been if she had just been a good daughter and obeyed her mother and didn't stay out past her curfew.

The door to her quarters slid open and Gaston came in with several guards. Their boots came into view in front of her bed, and some of their prods warningly sparked to life.

"204, get out of there." Gaston ordered.

Was it almost time to transform already? Her headaches hadn't reached their continuous peak yet, but she didn't trust herself to be able to tell the time anymore. She trusted them to know when it was time to eat and when it was time to have tests done and when it was time to rest and recover.

The subject crawled out of the bed, telling herself not to flinch at the sight of the prods. She wondered if the tests would be more intensive tonight after what she did to Dr. Gold. That was such a bad, impulsive move and she deserved any punishment that was to follow.

"Wall." Gaston pointed his prod threateningly close to her face. "Hands behind your back."

She was ready to accept whatever they had in store for her. She was going to be good. She was going to cooperate. She turned to face the wall and crossed her wrists behind her back.

Cooperation was what Dr. Gold needed and that was what she was going to give them.

The guards were cautious and tense, prods ready as they clipped the cuffs on her wrists together and detached the long chains that were hooked up to her bed. A hand pressed against the back of her head and pushed her face against the wall while they hooked chains onto either side of her collar.

A jolt of pain coursed through her head, at the worst possible time. She couldn't keep herself from yelping as the familiar splitting headache brought her to her knees. It was burning and pulsing and tightening and she hated it and she hated how it made cooperating more difficult.

Digging her claws into her palms to keep herself grounded through the pain, she breathed deeply and rapidly as the guards roughly pulled her to her feet by the chains and moved her through the door and into the hallway.

The pain clamping down on her skull and the burning in her eyes was making it hard to see where she was going and the unsteadiness to her legs made it difficult to keep walking forward as they tugged at her chains and yelled at her to keep moving.

They were angry with her and she wasn't behaving and she knew whatever was coming now was going to be something she deserved.

The transport was a blur of pain in her head and by the time it finally receded, she found herself looking around a small room with bleary eyes. A familiar scent was there. Belle's scent.

What was going to happen?

She couldn't understand it as she was roughly pushed into the chair across Belle.

"Remove the chains." That was Dr. Gold's voice coming int through the room's speakers.

Gaston's face showed a look of surprise before he nodded and placed a hand over her head, keeping her still so he could remove the chains.

"And disconnect the cuffs." Dr. Gold spoke again. "Let her be comfortable."

This wasn't right. The subject felt distress twirling in her stomach as Gaston reached behind her and unhooked the cuffs. They left the cuffs on. Maybe they would hook it to the table? Or the chair? Something?

"Take your positions outside."

This was all wrong.

She watched with horror as the guards left the room. Left her alone with Belle. Someone soft and small and so easy to hurt.

"Are you alright?" Belle's voice was worried and her face reflected her concern.

No. She wasn't alright. She was a monster. She should be in chains. She should be in chains and a cage, not unrestrained in a small room with a girl who didn't deserve to be harmed. The subject rubbed at her head, almost forgetting she didn't have long hair to tug at anymore.

"Please," Belle was growing distressed as well. "Please, just…"

This was all wrong. Something was wrong.

The subject stood up and paced the room, rubbing at her head and trying to steady her breathing. There were words catching her throat and she had to tell them that this wasn't safe. That they were making a mistake. This wasn't a test she was ready to take.

"R… 204," Belle stumbled over the number and that caught the subject's attention. "Please… could you please sit down?" She rubbed at her face and that's when the subject noticed that Belle's eyes were bloodshot and framed by dark circles. There was a tremor to her hands as well, and a hunched, tired look to her that hadn't been there the first time.

Despite how terrifying it was to be unrestrained and in such close proximity with someone unarmed, the subject sat back down across Belle.

Something bad was going to happen.

"I'm sorry," Looking very tired, Belle pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes like she was dealing with a headache. "I'm sorry, I know you're under a lot of stress right now."

It wasn't just stressful, it was terrifying. The subject didn't want to hurt anyone anymore and she wished she could express that to Belle, but she couldn't. The words wouldn't come out and instead she could only bury her face in her hands.

"You're scared," Belle said, "But I want you to know that I'm not going to hurt you."

That didn't matter. The subject could take any pain and deserved all pain. She kept her face buried in her hands.

"And I know that _you're_ not going to hurt me."

Putting her hands down and looking over at Belle, the subject searched for some sort of lie or trick or test but the expression on Belle's face was genuine. It was as if she trusted the subject when the subject didn't deserve to be trusted.

"I'd just like to talk to you," Belle said, "And I don't want to pressure you to respond to me. You can nod or shake your head if you agree or disagree, but you don't have to say anything if you're not comfortable with saying anything. Okay?"

She nodded.

Belle's tired face broke into a smile then, "Okay, great."

How was any of this great? She rubbed at her head, again wishing there was something to tug at to relieve the stress. At least she could settle for clenching her hands into fists under the table.

"You had long hair in your older files," Belle noted, "Did they cut it after you got here or is that more recent?"

The subject shrugged because it didn't matter. What mattered was that it was easier to put the scanners all over her and easier overall to deal with her. She missed her hair, but she didn't need it.

"Have you eaten?" Belle's next question was just as unexpected as the previous one.

She shook her head.

Thinking about food made the subject's stomach grumble and twist and she wondered if this was another test. If they wanted to see how well she could resist raw meat again. There was no scent of it, but… now that she was thinking about scents… she did notice something. It was hard to place and so mish-mashed that she couldn't figure it out.

"I don't know how," A tired smile was pulling at Belle's lips again, "But I managed to convince Dr. Gold to let us do this."

Curious despite herself, the subject tilted her head and leaned forward when Belle bent down to pick something up from under the table. The unfamiliar smell was tugging at her memory, just out of reach. She was so close to being able to decipher it but she couldn't quite put a finger on it. There was meat on it, that was for sure. _Actual cooked meat_. And cheese?

The box that Belle placed on top of the table was low and wide instead of tall, and there was an illustration of a spaceship on it.

Was this for real?

This had to be a test.

"Here," Belle opened the box and the subject was stunned to see _pizza_ for the first time in… a very long time. "We figured meatlovers would be something you'd like."

How was this not some kind of test? Was she supposed to resist this too?

"Help yourself," Belle slid the box to the center of the table, and the subject saw that it was a pizza on the smaller side, cut into eight slices. It wasn't the size you'd get for a big group, but it could fit three friends who loved to laugh together and watch vampire movies together.

The memory hit the subject out of nowhere and she felt a fresh wave of guilt after what she'd done to Peter and Dorothy.

"Look, it's safe." Belle brought her trembling hands over to the box and pulled out a slice and it was fascinating to see the cheese stretch itself out into a thin line before flopping onto the table. "I'll have one and eat with you. But please take at least one slice."

This wasn't real.

But it smelled _so_ good.

A rumble came from her stomach and she wasn't sure if Belle could hear it.

"204," Belle almost seemed to wince at saying the number before she gestured towards the box. "Go ahead. Nothing bad will happen if you take a slice. I promise."

She was so hungry.

Biting her lip, she brought a hand out from under the table and hesitated. She looked at Belle one more time, wordlessly asking for permission.

"It's okay," Belle was patient and nodded, "Go ahead." As if to prove that nothing was wrong with the food, she took a big bite out of her slice and let out a soft moan as the taste of it hit her senses.

It was impossible to resist this and she wasn't restrained. The subject gave in and reached over to take a slice, only to notice drops of blood she'd left on the table.

Quickly, she put her hands back under the table.

Belle noticed and put her slice down on the flap of the box. "204, may I see your hands?"

As much as she didn't want to do that, the subject knew that Dr. Gold wanted cooperation. Reluctance had no place in this facility and being an easy subject to deal with would make things go much more smoothly for everyone involved.

After taking a deep breath and biting her lip, the subject brought her hands up to the table, at first in closed fists, face down.

Belle reached over and touched the subject's hands, lightly wrapping palms over knuckles. "Please? May I look?"

Cooperation. They wanted cooperation.

Ashamed of herself, the subject nodded and allowed Belle to move her hands face up to show the bloody, scarred palms. The newest cuts had closed now, but the blood was still there, and still damp.

"Does it help?" Belle asked, "When you do that?"

It was tempting to shrug and give a noncommittal answer, but the subject decided to be truthful and instead nodded.

A look passed over Belle's face, and the subject wasn't sure how to read it, but it almost reminded her of faces Dorothy would make whenever the subject would mention some frustrating but not unusual thing that Mother would do.

Pity? Worry? Frustration? Disgust? Something combining those?

Belle let go of the subject's hands but she didn't dare move them and just watched as Belle brought out a thermos from under the table. She pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and poured some of the water onto it.

"May I?" Belle reached over and took one of the subject's hands.

She nodded.

Gently, Belle wiped at the blood on both hands until the palms were clean. "At least now you can eat comfortably, right?"

Not quite sure how to respond to that, and still taken aback by the gesture, the subject nodded.

"Actually, since we're doing this…" Belle took out some tissue and dampened those as well before she got up and walked over to stand over the subject. "There's some on your face as well… May I?"

This was strange and the subject wasn't at all used to this and she feared that it was a test and she had no idea how she was expected to react to any of this.

But Belle was in charge of this test and the subject was supposed to do what she said, right?

She nodded.

It was hard not to tense up, and the subject did wince when Belle's hands first made contact, but as she lightly wiped at the dried blood along the subject's cheeks and forehead and even hair, it became impossible to resist the urge to lean into the touch.

There was a moment.

Belle was just about done cleaning up, but left a palm pressed against the subject's cheek, and it felt so warm and soft and nice that she couldn't help but close her eyes for just a moment and feel… something different for just a moment.

This was a test.

She didn't deserve to be so close to someone she knew she was capable of hurting.

The subject pulled away and brought her hands close to her chest. She looked at Belle and wished for the words needed to express gratitude, but they wouldn't come out. They stayed in her throat and she could only open her mouth and then close it and look away.

"It's okay." Belle took her seat back at the other side of the table. "You don't have to say anything. We can just… share a meal. How does that sound?"

The food looked so good. Smelled so good.

If this was a test, the subject hoped they were expecting her to accept the food because the smell of it was driving her mad and she had to take a bite.

With hands that were now much cleaner, she grabbed the meatiest slice and pulled it over to herself. A line of cheese trailed across the table, but it smelled so good. This was so strange and so surreal. She looked at Belle one more time, asking for permission one more time.

"Go ahead." Belle smiled, taking another bite from her own pizza.

One bite alone was just breathtaking. There was the flavor and juice of the meat, the warm wetness of the cheese, the chewiness of the crust. It was a flurry of flavor in her mouth and her senses were just enveloped by it all.

It tasted so good.

She couldn't stop herself from taking another bite.

So.

Good.

Another bite brought her to a higher plane of sensory overload where all her senses were loaded by pizza. She could smell the cheese and the crust and the meat. She could taste the flavors dancing in her mouth. She could feel the stickiness and the oiliness in her fingers and around her mouth. If it was talking, she would probably had been able to _hear_ it, too. Maybe begging her to eat it.

She was enjoying this and she hoped it would never end.

Another bite.

Another.

The slice was gone far too soon and she licked her lips and watched Belle still slowly working her way through her first slice.

"Help yourself to another," Belle said, and that was more than enough permission.

She took another slice and tore into it, barely caring about the cheese and sauce dripping over the table and probably coating her face now too.

"Are you liking it?" Belle asked, finally finishing her first slice.

The subject nodded and realized she was smiling.

And realized _this wasn't right._

What reason did she have to smile?

She was murderer. She was a serial killer just like Granny and this was all wrong. Eating pizza and having a nice girl to clean her up? That was nothing like what she deserved. What she deserved was her imprisonment, her isolation and her punishment. The hunger, the pain, the loneliness, the fear- all of that was her penance for all the people she'd killed and all the people she'd injured.

Her eyes were warming up again and she stood up abruptly.

"204, what's wrong?" Belle asked, starting to stand up as well.

This wasn't right. Everything about this was wrong.

When Belle started to approach, the subject lifted one of her hands to motion for Belle to stop. Stop approaching. Stop with the feeding. Stop with the talking. Stop with being so _nice_.

Monsters don't deserve nice.

It was getting hard to breathe and she felt her chest getting tight and painful. She stumbled backwards until she was leaning against the wall. It was too small in here, too tight and too bright. Her gown felt itchy and her skin was burning up and she felt distress and terror and guilt and shame and horror and she knew none of this was the way things were supposed to be.

Her trembling legs bucked under her and she crumpled to the floor and grasped at her short hair and hid her face between her elbows.

"204, it's okay." Belle's voice was soft as she crouched down in front of the subject.

No.

This wasn't okay.

"204, breathe." The advice sounded oddly familiar, and it reminded her of Mulan.

But it was so hard to breathe. She wasn't getting enough air and she felt like she was going to die when she knew she didn't deserve to do so.

"Breathe in," Belle said, "Breathe in."

It was hard to control it, but she tried.

"Breathe out."

It came out fast and wheezy and she felt dizzy and scared and upset.

"Breathe in."

They went through the cycle a few times until the subject felt more in control of her breathing. She felt lightheaded though, and a headache were starting to build up and she knew that Belle wasn't going to be safe for much longer.

"Are you feeling the change?"

She nodded just before crying out as the splitting agony pounded against her head. This was all going wrong. The last time anyone offered her comfort while she was in distress, a classroom turned into a bloodbath.

Blinded by pain, she scrambled away from Belle, and pressed herself against the opposite wall of the room. She held up her hand, again wishing Belle would understand the gesture to mean that she should stop trying to come closer. It was dangerous.

Then the pain faded and the subject slid to the floor. It was hard to say when the next episode would hit, but she knew that if it was going to increase in frequency, then it was almost time to shift. And she needed to be in chains when that happened.

Hopefully, Belle would understand that the subject needed to get out of here and be back in the room with the chains. Or any room where she couldn't reach anyone she could hurt.

Sliding herself closer to the door, the subject pressed a hand against it then looked at Belle. _Get me out of here so I don't hurt you. Please._ Were the words she wished she could have said, but they couldn't come out.

A piercing sound came from out of nowhere. It was sharp and it felt like it was stabbing through her ears, straight into her head.

She had to make it stop. It hurt and it was horrible and she had to make it stop.

Covering her ears wasn't working.

The sound was inside her skull and it was painful and stabbing and sharp. It was agitating her and she felt her eyes warming up and her heartbeat gaining speed. She had to make it stop.

Growling, she dug her claws into her palms to keep herself from lunging at Belle, who was now speaking with a hand over her ear like she was in contact with someone outside. It was impossible to hear anything over the piercing noise.

It was so painful.

This was different from the splitting pain in her head when she was going to transform.

It was like needles all across her skull and ears and she wanted it to stop and it was making her angry.

Her eyes were burning up and she was focusing on Belle and she had to keep herself from lunging, but her muscles were tensing up and she was feeling the anger coursing through her and she was sure this was all a test.

She just didn't understand what they wanted her to do, and she wished she had the words to ask them that so the piercing pain would stop.

It was all she could hear and it was inside of her and it was agitating and distressing.

Her palms were bleeding from her claws but it wasn't enough. She wanted to lunge at Belle and demand that she make the noise stop.

The sounds coming out of her own mouth weren't reaching her ears. She couldn't hear anything but that damn noise and Belle had probably caused it and was subduing the subject for something she did wrong. This was the punishment she deserved.

But it hurt so much and it made her so angry.

With her clenched and bleeding fists, she pounded at her head and hoped the noise would stop, but it wouldn't go away.

The door burst open and guards came in and jolts of electricity coursed through her and all she knew was pain until she felt a needle press into her arm and then she felt herself go limp and numb and everything faded into darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i might have to give myself a break tomorrow and just post the next chapter on tuesday since i want to think over how the next couple of chapters will play out as the Insomniac Club tries to come up with a plan
> 
> Edit:   
> [konako did a thing, look](http://konako.tumblr.com/post/160184332686)  
> 


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry y'all got no chapter yesterday. I was busy and drained af from hanging out with German relatives who arrived this weekend. And today I am at work and have to stay overtime but money is nice so is uki.
> 
> (visit the previous chapter, i embedded another wonderful illustration from konako)
> 
> Also this chapter's relatively tame, more of a transition and breather chapter than anything else. Also it was supposed to be a bit longer but I broke it into two because I wanted to spend more time developing some succeeding scenes.

It was haunting.

There was so much fear in her movements as she constantly glanced at the door and looked around the room. The tired slouch to her body was saddening, as were the dark circles under her eyes.

And those hands.

The palms were scarred and rough, riddled by lines and marks and twisted skin. It was haunting to think of how Ruby must have dug her claws into her hands so often, so extensively and so deeply that the skin couldn't close properly anymore.

It was just as haunting to think of how that was a habit she'd probably developed to ground herself and cope with the horrors of her life in the past seven years.

There was so much fear and suspicion in Ruby's tired eyes, Belle did her best to make the most of their session and offer kindness, comfort and reassurance. She hoped to help Ruby feel human and valued, but Belle knew that one short session couldn't be enough to undo the seven years of damage Dr. Gold and his team had already inflicted.

And it broke Belle's heart to see Ruby suddenly in so much pain. It must have been the transformation taking effect, but there was something about her behavior that bothered Belle. Something was off.

Thinking over the memory of it, Belle recalled that Ruby kept covering her ears, even clawing and pawing at them before she started pounding at her head.

It wasn't like the thrashing and squirming she did the last few times.

"Hello, Belle, dearie," Dr. Gold came into the office and hung his labcoat on the door. "I thought you'd have gone ahead home."

The tremors to her hands had subsided as the caffeine wore off, but Belle still felt the heavy fog clouding her head. "I didn't feel like leaving yet."

Nodding, Dr. Gold took a seat at his desk. "The subject shifted into her wolf state and then back without any trouble. We're already familiar with the right dosages required to keep her sedated before, during and after the transformation, so it went by fairly easily."

"So you just kept her asleep through it?" Belle asked, and just before the accusing tone to latch onto her voice, she calmed herself enough to continue in a lighter tone, "Why wasn't that done the first night or the second night?"

Dr. Gold raised an eyebrow, "Because we had different tests scheduled for that day, I thought that would be obvious, dearie."

"Right." Belle looked down at her hands and felt the fog in her head weigh down more heavily.

"So how did you feel about your session?" Dr. Gold asked as he went through sheets on his desk.

Rubbing at her forehead and leaning back against the tacky couch, Belle closed her eyes and thought over how best to respond to this. Her head felt so clouded and heavy, it was becoming such a difficult task to connect her thoughts and organize them.

Dr. Gold probably noticed Belle's difficulty and prompted her. "Do you still believe 204 to be more human than animal?"

That sparked her anger again, but it wasn't enough to drive energy back into her tired head and tired body and tired _everything_.

"I…" Belle was too drained for this. "I don't know."

"I'm going to have a talk with Tamara later to discuss some of her other ideas for the program with 204, Regina and Emma." Dr. Gold said, "Whale and Hopper will be there as well. I'd invite you to join us, but I have a feeling you should go home now and sleep."

That sounded so fucking good right about now.

"You can come back after the weekend."

The initial thought was distress at knowing Ruby and Emma would be stuck here for another several days. Maybe even Regina, too, if she was still being kept here to be monitored.

Belle reminded herself that the plan being developed with Mulan and Aurora would take time and wouldn't benefit from them doing anything sudden.

So Belle got herself to nod graciously, "Thank you, sir."

"You seem to get along well with Aurora," Dr. Gold said, "I could have her called over so she can help you get home." His eyes went over Belle, up and down, and it was unnerving. "Frankly, I'm not comfortable with you driving home in your state."

Belle was too exhausted to argue and just nodded while pinching the bridge of her nose.

Then a thought crossed her mind. "Dr. Gold?"

"Yes, dearie?"

Licking her lips and trying not to wince at the throbbing in her head, Belle looked over at him. "Have you thought about letting Aurora study 204 with us?" As an afterthought, she added, "Maybe Jane as well?"

Dr. Gold didn't answer right away, seeming to think it over as he checked on the data on his computer and the files on his desk.

The room was fading in and out of focus.

"Do you think they would provide interesting insights if we let them join sessions with 204?" Dr. Gold asked.

"I guess?" Belle winced at how dense she sounded and backtracked, "Aurora's research on sleep and the supernatural is a bit different from the studies on 204, but…"

Quick, think of a connection.

Something.

Sleep is done at night.

"…maybe in her research she's noticed some connections between the night or the moon and the supernatural?" Belle said, "I'm sure she's come across some findings and just didn't include it in her thesis because it wasn't directly related."

God, she was pulling all of this out of thin air, hopefully Dr. Gold wouldn't notice.

"Interesting thought, Belle" Dr. Gold said, "I'll think about it over the weekend. Jane may be valuable as well, given her research on animals and feral behavior."

"Exactly!" Belle was probably a little too enthusiastic about getting Dr. Gold to at least consider bringing Aurora into the picture. And Jane. She was one of them too. Sort of. Belle didn't know her very well.

Dr. Gold seemed amused by the enthusiasm because he chuckled before pushing a button on the intercom, "Igor, be a dearie and have Aurora sent to my office."

It was tempting to complain and whine about not being a child and insist that she was capable of handling herself and getting herself home, thank you very much. But Belle couldn't fool herself. She was tired and drained and running on fumes and driving home on her own would probably be a disaster waiting to happen.

The sound of shuffling papers filled the office as Dr. Gold continued going through his files and making notes. An obnoxious old, wooden clock ticked noisily from the corner.

"What are you planning to talk about later?" Belle asked, just to fill the awkward silence settling over the office. "With Tamara and the other scientists?"

"We mostly want to see what else we can do with the three of them," Dr. Gold said, "Things like the extent to which Emma can link to 204. Maybe also see if Emma may be capable of linking _Regina_ to 204. Also, it'll be interesting to see if they're capable of stopping 204 from shifting if she's on the verge of doing so."

"Oh…" Belle rested her forehead in her hands and leaned her elbows against her knees. Fuck looking poised. She was too tired to maintain any semblance of that when she was already using up so much energy acting like she still thought Dr. Gold was amazing. "Okay."

"We could hold off on those tests until after the weekend," Dr. Gold said, "So you can be part of it. Either way Regina and Emma still need to rest anyway, and 204 could also use some recovery time since the full moon period always leaves her very drained."

"How long will Regina be… kept here?" Belle asked, turning to look at Dr. Gold but still keeping her cheek in her palm. "To recover?"

Dr. Gold shrugged.

A knock on the door kept Belle from pushing further.

"Come in, dearie."

The door swung open and Aurora walked in, looking a lot more fresh than Belle probably looked. "You asked for me, sir?" Then as she took in the gauze on Dr. Gold's cheek, Aurora's jaw dropped, "Sir, what happened to your-"

"Don't worry about it, dearie. I'm fine. And that's not what I called you over to discuss." Dr. Gold waved a dismissive hand as he stood up from his desk, "You can have the day off and a long weekend if you do something for me."

 _That didn't sound sketchy at all._ Belle put a hand over her mouth to keep herself from saying the thought out loud.

"Sir?" Aurora looked confused.

"Take Belle home," Dr. Gold said, "She needs the rest, but I don't think it will be safe for her to drive home in her condition."

_I'm not fucking helpless._

Belle rubbed at her temples and focused on staying quiet and staying awake. Her eyelids were heavy and her head was heavy. Everything was heavy and foggy and Dr. Gold's face was dumb.

"Er…" Aurora glanced from Dr. Gold to Belle and back. "Okay."

"Alright then," Belle unsteadily got to her feet and slung her bag over her shoulder, "Now that my babysitter is here, can we go?" She winced at how rude and aggressive that sounded and even Aurora shot Belle a look somewhere between warning and distressed.

Dr. Gold rolled with it and just laughed, "Very well, Belle. Go ahead."

As Aurora led the way out, Dr. Gold's voice followed them with, "Take care of her for me, Aurora. Make sure she gets some sleep!"

It made Belle cringe as they closed the door behind them, but they didn't dare say anything until they got to the parking lot outside.

"He seems... quite worried about you." Aurora noted.

"No shit." Belle grumbled, hating how groggy she was and hating how unfocused her vision was.

Aurora opened the door for Belle, who blindly shambled in, only to be surprised that the steering wheel wasn't in front of her. She turned to see Aurora getting into the driver's seat.

" _You can drive?_ "

"Uh, _yes_?" Aurora looked offended, "Just because I don't have a car doesn't mean I didn't bother learning how to drive when necessary."

Belle quieted and leaned back against the seat, "Okay."

The engine roared to life and Aurora shifted the gear into reverse, only for the car to let out a very intense and painful scream as it lurched backward.

"What the fuck are you doing?" After too long a night of holding back, Belle couldn't keep the snap from slipping out. "You're going to kill my car!"

"Shut up, I didn't know you drove manual!" Aurora tried again and this time managed to awkwardly, noisily pull out of the parking spot.

Belle pressed her fingers against her forehead then ran her hand through her hair, trying to keep herself calm. She wanted nothing more than to pass out right now, but that didn't seem possible if her car was going to scream in distress every few meters when they weren't even out of the parking lot yet.

"Just get your foot on the clutch first, okay?" Belle said, "Before switching any gears."

"Okay, got it."

It took several tries for Aurora to get the hang of moving the car along quietly. More or less quietly. And she only more or less got the hang of it.

Everytime the car cried out in pain, Belle felt a little of herself die on the inside. Stoplights were the worst and several cars already honked at them to get moving along properly. It was a disaster and Belle had to keep herself from snapping at her already stressed out driver.

* * *

Sitting in the dining room (drinking juice and having chips because Mother would be _livid_ if there was any alcohol discovered in the trash), they made the most of what they had and still managed to have fun.

"So you just did it?" She asked, stuffing chips into her mouth, "You asked her out?"

Dorothy nodded as a blush spread over her cheeks, "I kinda just followed Peter's lead. Thanks man, by the way." She extended her fist and Peter met it with his, "I did what he did and just walked up to her and asked her out."

There it was again. That odd, twisting feeling in her gut at the thought of Dorothy finding happiness in someone else.

It was stupid. Peter was already right there. And he was more than enough. He made her happy and he made her feel valued.

They both did, actually.

Banishing those thoughts from her mind, she focused instead on pressing Dorothy for more details. "So did she say yes?"

Dorothy nodded, "I've got a date with her tomorrow and I'm scared shitless!"

"You got this!" Peter clapped her on the back. "We're rooting for you."

Laughing, Dorothy wrapped an arm around Peter, at first in a one-armed hug, but she transitioned into a headlock and ruffled his beautiful hair, "Wolfie, I like this one. Can I adopt him as my brother?"

"We're already bros!" Peter squirmed out of Dorothy's grasp. She moved an arm towards him to grab him again, but he swatted it away and started running his fingers through his hair to rearrange it. "And dude, I spent all morning on this, have some heart."

"But it's so fun to mess up." She herself moved in and ruffled what he'd just barely managed to salvage. "And you use way too much product, how is your hair not dead yet?" The strands were thickly clumped together and very stiff. Whatever he used also tended to stick to her fingers every time she touched his masterpiece.

Peter laughed and shrugged, "Maybe in like twenty years it'll be dead and I'll be bald, but let me enjoy it while I can now."

"Bald Peter would be kinda gross." Dorothy cringed as she pictured the image of Peter without his lovely hair. Then she smirked, "Let's shave him, Wolfie. I'll hold him down, you get the razor."

"Noooo!" Peter's face was exaggerated and dramatic, one hand over his chest, another over his hair, "Not my pride and joy! The love of my life!"

She put on a look of deep offense, "I thought _I_ was the love of your life!"

"I can have two, can't i?" Peter winked.

Though she let out a laugh at that, something in her thought again about the odd, bottled up feelings she had for Dorothy, versus the warm and intense feelings she felt for Peter. But she knew she couldn't entertain whatever weird thoughts she had about Dorothy. It was bad enough that mother disapproved of the relationship with Peter. What more something with Dorothy?

"By the way," When the laughing and teasing died down, Peter pointedly looked at the two of them. "Love, I was supposed to wait to give this on your birthday, but…" He sheepishly stumbled over his words then, "Well you know how we can't do anything on your exact birthday."

They tried to schedule a small celebration at the house for her birthday, but Mother had flatly said no and insisted that it was out of the question and that they had to be alone in the house that night and the nights before and after.

She had a feeling that headache week would be that week, and Mother was always very particular about being at home on the nights of headache week.

"…so." Peter reached into his bag and pulled out a sloppily wrapped little package. Tape was sticking out of it and there were wrinkles and creases everywhere. "I want you to open this now."

"Okay?" She raised an eyebrow at Peter before reaching over to accept the package. It was barely bigger than her hand, and very light. She tore at the wrapping until three bracelets slithered onto the table.

They were each about the width of her finger, dark leather woven together. A small strip of metal was on each bracelet and as she brought them closer to her face to read the engraved lettering. She saw "Wolfie", "Kansas" and "Haircut."

"You girls are always all over me and my hair," Peter shrugged, but that goofy grin was still on his cute face, "So I figured my stupid nickname could be Haircut."

"Bro," Dorothy threw a chip at Peter, " _We're_ supposed to name you. Do you not know how this kind of shit works?"

"Let him be, Kansas." She put her own bracelet around her wrist and handed them theirs, "I love it either way!"

Dorothy rolled her eyes as she accepted hers, "I would have gone with Puffball or Nerd. I mean who else gets _friendship bracelets_?"

Happily accepting his and putting it on, Peter made a face at Dorothy, "You're making fun of it but you're _wearing_ it!"

With an exaggerated, exasperated sigh, Dorothy gestured towards her, "Because I'm doing it for Wolfie. Even if friendship bracelets are the corniest thing ever."

"They aren't corny!" She flicked a chip in Dorothy's direction, then leaned over to give Peter's cheek a kiss, "I love them. Thank you."

He leaned in and put an arm around her, "I know how much you love the both of us, so I figured the perfect gift would be something that would remind you of that, right?"

And it was perfect. It was still a good week before her birthday, but it was perfect. This moment was perfect. She was part of something and she felt like she belonged. She had a place in this world, and it wasn't to play patient in the basement or to do whatever Mother says. It was to stick by these two people who were the world to her.

Around these two people, she didn't have to be the daughter of that strange woman who didn't interact with neighbors or other parents. She didn't have to be the granddaughter of the serial killer. She didn't have to be that student who is terrible at paying attention and staying still.

She could just be herself. Their friend. Their Wolfie.

They were part of something and they were going to stick together no matter what and that felt really good.

* * *

By the time they finally got to Belle's father's house, she wanted nothing more than a long, hot shower and a long, deep sleep. It took several attempts to get the key into the front door lock, not including dropping everything at least once.

When the door finally swung open, Belle was irritable and tired and contemplating murder.

"Should I hang around?" Aurora asked, "Or should I uber home now?"

"I don't fucking care," Belle stomped over to her room to pick out the clothes she was going to pass out in after her shower, but stopped when she realized she was being a terrible host and a terrible friend.

When she went back down the hall to the living room, Aurora was still standing there, arms folded across her chest. "You're welcome?"

"I'm sorry," Belle felt like her head was going to fall off with how heavy it felt. "You did great driving me home, and I appreciate it." Even if Belle was probably going to have to spend the weekend making sure the battery wasn't going to die or the car itself wasn't going to explode. "You can stay for a bit if you want. There's juice and water in the fridge, glasses in the cupboard. Just help yourself. I need to drown myself in the shower."

Aurora relaxed a little then, "Apology accepted. Now go freshen up. I'll stick around for a bit since I didn't really make plans today. I wasn't exactly expecting Dr. Gold to give me the day off just to babysit you."

"Actually, yeah." Belle nodded as she started walking back down the hall to get ready for her shower. "He's been acting really weird lately, and I don't know how to feel about it."

"Well just try to remember what Mulan said," Aurora's voice came from the kitchen, accompanied by clinking glasses, "Just be nice to him and stay on his good side since he _does_ seem to favor you more than the rest of us."

"Fine." Belle lumbered into the shower and tried to purge herself of the heaviness she'd been carrying in the past three days. Or was it four days? The water was warm and soothing as she focused herself on the present for just a moment. It had been a long, draining three days in which she'd only had several hours of rest. She'd been pent up and wound up and all over the place.

She could allow herself this time to relax a little.

In the back of her mind though, she couldn't help but think about how she could get some rest and escape for a bit but Ruby and Emma _lived_ there and had no choice but to experience whatever tests were thrown their way.

She was moving in such a daze that Belle couldn't remember getting from the shower to the bed, but she was here now and so close to passing out.

"Aurora," Belle fought the fog and forced herself to sit up, "I'm not sure how much longer I can stay conscious, will you just help yourself out because I'm going to be a terrible host." This was childish and stupid but her body was slowly shutting down and her head just wanted to drop into the pillows.

The bed was so soft.

And the pillows were soft.

The blanket was soft and warm.

Everything was soft.

Everything was dark and soft and warm.

It was cold. It was frightening. There was the sound of beeping and machinery.

Belle opened her eyes to find herself in a small, cold room with charts on the walls and a hospital bed next to beeping machines. Taking in her surroundings, she jumped when the door behind her swung open and someone _went through her._

"Wow, it actually worked." Aurora's voice came from next to Belle.

"Aurora, what the hell?" Belle thought she was going to finally have the chance to escape the facility for a few hours but instead here she was, most likely in the facility again, judging by the same walls and the same machine brands and… "Is that Regina?"

There she was, lying on the bed as Dr. Hopper stood over her.

Moving closer, Belle felt like she was floating and disconnected as she brought herself over to the bedside.

The feeling of fear grew stronger, and Belle realized she was sensing Regina's fear.

"How much longer am I going to be kept here?" Regina was saying, "Please, just… just tell me how much longer you need me here. Tell me if Mother is expecting me home."

Horror blasted through Belle when she realized that Regina was cuffed to the bed. The dextrose hooked up to her hand was making her groggy, but it wasn't enough to wash out her mounting fear.

"I'm sorry, Regina." Dr. Hopper was switching out the sunken IV bag for a fresh one, "Dr. Gold hasn't cleared me to tell you about any arrangements made with your mother."

The cuffs clanged as Regina tried to reach for Dr. Hopper. "What arrangements? Is she the one keeping me here?" There was a rush of anger through Regina, and there was a building warmth like she was trying to use her abilities, but the grogginess washed over her.

"I'm sorry," Dr. Hopper said as Regina lay back down on the bed.

The scene grew hazy and Belle found herself back in her room, watching herself sleep and watching Aurora slouched over the desk. It was surreal seeing herself. It was surreal seeing Aurora passed out on the desk and Aurora standing at the foot of the bed.

Belle turned to Aurora. The awake, almost transparent one. "Was it your first time doing this? On purpose?"

The nervousness and uneasiness in Aurora was something Belle could feel as well. It was a different kind of link as the one with Emma, where thoughts and images were shared. With Aurora, it was more abstract, more of emotion and energy.

"I tinkered a bit last night." Aurora said. "I was able to see you and Ruby last night. I tried to see Emma and Regina but it was hazy since I already spent energy watching you and Ruby."

"You saw how they took her away?" The memory of it still haunted Belle, and from the feeling of pity and pain coming from Aurora, she had seen and felt it too.

"Yeah."

"But this is your first time bringing someone else with you?"

There was a sheepish feeling coming from Aurora now as she bit her lip and avoided eye contact. "Yeah… I wasn't sure if it would work, I just kind of… felt like trying?"

Now, Belle could relate to Mulan's feeling of being invaded. As much as she appreciated being able to get an answer as to what they did to Regina after the other night, Belle would have appreciated being asked first.

"Next time ask before transporting my…" she gestured vaguely at herself, not sure what was the appropriate term to use, "... _astral self_ somewhere else. Okay?"

Aurora nodded, "Yeah, sorry about that. I'll… let you sleep properly now."

"Wait," Belle still wanted to discuss and process what they just saw happening to Regina, but already, there was another lurch and Belle felt herself being pulled towards her body on the bed.

* * *

Her head felt like it was full of thick stuffing as she looked around her. Aside from the usual cuffs and collar keeping her down, there again were the thick straps across her shoulders, waist and legs. An IV drip was working its way into her and from the way it both burned her and made her groggy, she figured it was the wolfsbane cocktail she knew they often used to sedate her.

"Nice to see you awake, dearie." Dr. Gold came into view and guilt washed over her at the sight of the gauze on his face.

If she only had the words to apologize to him. She looked up at him and tried to mouth the words, but not even her lips were cooperating. They were dry and cracked and stiff.

"Do you remember much of your session with Belle yesterday?"

There was the pizza. The really good pizza that was now making her stomach feel kind of bloated.

The hands. Belle had cleaned the subject's mangled hands and bloody face.

Kindness. It was a session full of kindness and it was all wrong. The subject didn't deserve that. Serial killers and monsters didn't deserve any of that. They took away lives and destroyed everything in their wake. They broke promises of sticking by each other. They _did not_ deserve kindness.

"Do you remember this?"

The piercing sound was shrill and painful, stabbing into her ears and skull. She cried out and thrashed against her restraints, throwing her head side to side in a futile effort to drive the sound away from her ears.

Pain.

It was loud and painful and sharp.

Her eyes were warming up and her jaw was stiffening.

It hurt so much.

And finally, it stopped.

The subject lay limp on the bed- damp and warm and drained. The machines were beeping rapidly in time with her heartbeat, but they gradually slowed to a more even pace. There was still a residual ringing in her ears but it was tolerable compared to that horrible, sharp sound.

"I will have this on hand, dearie," Dr. Gold said, "For your sessions with Belle. I know how much of a danger you are but _she_ does not."

That was true. That was very true.

There wasn't much the subject knew about Belle, but if anything, it was clear that she had no real understanding of the danger and monstrosity of this subject. Belle was showing kindness and asking questions and it was all wrong.

"For any sessions you have in the future with her, if I see you _ever_ posing a danger to Belle," Dr. Gold continued, "If I ever see you losing even a _fraction_ of control around her…"

The piercing sound came again, stabbing her ears, stabbing her head. Needles and needles and nails and pins were lining the inside of her skull. There was pressure in her ears and she was afraid that they were going to pop.

When the sound finally stopped, she was breathing heavily and the machines were beeping loudly.

She nodded at Dr. Gold so he knew that she understood.

He had no idea how much she understood.

Belle shouldn't even be so close to the subject. Shouldn't even _want_ to be close to the subject. But from Dr. Gold's words, the subject could guess that yesterday's session with Belle was not going to be the last. And that was all wrong. They should be as far away from each other as possible. Belle was small and soft and innocent and the subject didn't deserve to be near her.

"Now that we have an understanding," Dr. Gold started to walk away, "I'll leave you to your rest. We'll move you to your quarters later."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blame Konako for the bracelet scene (which may be referenced in a future chapter) and for the evil dog whistle of doom
> 
> Also omg Regina bb r u ok
> 
> As for the next chapter, there are some scenes I know I wanna do, but some parts are still ideas I have to develop. Any thoughts on Belle bonding with Sleeping Warrior over the weekend and further planning out The Escape™? Coz I might develop a scene or two of that. I don't know yet. I'm not sure yet when the next chapter can go up, but we'll see.
> 
> As always, your thoughts and feels are very much appreciated!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first scene in this chapter is because Konako asked some questions about Ruby's day to day, week to week life in the facility. So screw you Konako. Also lol thanks Leticia on our meta discussion on what booze these girls like to drink.

The bed rattling above her jolted her awake.

"204, get out"

After the full moon, her energy was down and she was sluggish and hungry, but she knew better than to behave too slowly or reluctantly. Rubbing the drowsiness from her face, she stifled a yawn before crawling out from under the bed and facing the wall with her hands behind her back. The usual.

A hand pressed her head against the wall while they switched out the chains and another pair of hands clasped her cuffs together.

"All yours, Mulan." The guard roughly pulled the subject by shoulder and jostled her forward. She nearly crashed into Mulan, just barely managing to steady herself in time. "You sure you're up for dealing with her alone?"

Mulan nodded, putting a hand on the subject's shoulder with a noticeable difference in gentleness, guiding her out through the door. "I got this."

A smirk passed over the other guard's face as he nudged Mulan, "Wanna keep her to yourself, eh? Did you make sure Sleepy was passed out in front of the monitors again?"

There was a tight set to Mulan's jaw as she moved the subject forward, "You heard Gaston. The next time he sees Walter passed out in front of the monitors, he's losing his job."

"Wasn't he out drinking again last night though?" The guard's smirk was still there, "He already looked hungover and half dead when he checked in. You got the perfect chance."

"Just shut up and go do something else." Mulan's voice was stern and cold as she dismissed the other guard before continuing to move the subject down the hallway. " _The sick bastard_." The words were whispered as soon as the other guard was left far behind them.

They made their way through the halls and doors until they got to a familiar door and the subject knew what would be coming next. It was a relief that Mulan was the assigned guard this time. She always made it easier.

Mulan unlocked the door and led the way into the tiled room with pipes and sprinklers and hoses and chains. The scent of other creatures always hung in the air here. It was a wet fur kind of smell, and most of the time she couldn't quite place what the smells were. At least one smell was kind of like horse or goat like in petting zoos.

"They have cameras here," Mulan moved behind the subject to unlink the cuffs, "But it's usually not so heavily monitored, specially when you or… similarly… human-ish subjects are scheduled here."

Did it matter? Besides, a dangerous creature needed the heavy monitoring in case she lost control for even a moment. She turned to face Mulan and wished for the words to express that, but none came out.

"You could…" Mulan gestured vaguely, "Y'know."

The subject tilted her head to one side.

Mulan gestured again, moving her palms from up to down. "While I put away my radio and prod and get the water system ready."

Right.

The other guards were usually more direct with their orders and some offered their assistance. Mulan usually used vague words and let the subject do it herself.

While Mulan went behind the wall to put some of her items away and prepare the system, the subject worked her way out of the gown and wondered where to put it.

The chain clipped to her collar just trailed along the tiled floor, not attached to anything. Her hands were free. These were making the subject nervous and uneasy. She didn't want to accidentally hurt Mulan, not after all the nice little things the guard would do for her.

"Alright, let's do this." Mulan came back, this time without her gloves and with her sleeves rolled up to her elbows. Looking down, the subject noticed slippers in place of the boots. "Ready?"

The subject reached the gown over to Mulan.

"Thank you," Mulan accepted the gown and took it to one end of the room, hanging it on a rack. She came back with a hose and stood in front of the subject, carefully keeping her eyes at face level. "You can head into the shower area whenever you're ready. Then I can get the water running."

She wasn't ready. This wasn't ready properly. Grasping part of the chain, she showed it to Mulan.

A look went over Mulan's face and it was hard to read. It was… sad? "We don't need to hook up your chain, do we?"

The subject nodded her head. They did need to. It was for everyone's safety.

"Hey," Mulan took another step towards the subect, "I know you don't want to hurt me, and I know you're scared you're going to. But it's going to be fine."

No, it wasn't.

"Okay," Mulan sighed, the reluctance clear in her tone, "Only because you insist. And I guess it's better in case someone checks the footage."

She took the chain and led the way to the water area, hooking it up to the bolts that were already there. The smell of other creatures was stronger, and the subject still couldn't quite place most of the smells. But knowing that the chain was secured helped ease some of her anxiety. At least if she lost control, Mulan had lower chances of being harmed.

"Remember on my first month here," Mulan was preparing the hose, "I didn't know what the hell I was doing."

The memory was vague at first, but the subject was able to recall how much younger Mulan looked then, and how tense and nervous she was as she tried to figure out the setup and the controls while the other guards laughed at her before leaving them alone to have their lunch break.

"You actually were the one who managed to kind of show me what stuff to press and how to set stuff up."

There was more than one hose and the subject was surprised when Mulan reached one over to her.

What kind of test was this? The subject eyed the offered hose suspiciously.

"Would you prefer the hose or the shower system?"

The subject shrugged. It didn't particularly matter and it wasn't her call to make anyway. She just wanted to get this over with so they could take her back to her quarters where there was nobody that she could hurt but herself. And that was the way it should be.

"Okay, tell you what," Mulan pressed the hose into the subject's hands, and they both nearly dropped it and both grabbed it. Before the subject could let go, Mulan already did, and she stepped back with her own hose in hand. "Just like old times, you can have the first shot at me."

No.

They weren't supposed to be playing games and having fun. Mulan had been yelled at by Gaston when he came in to check on them during one of their games. After that, they were more careful and followed the rules properly.

A stupid game of hosing each other down wasn't worth getting Mulan into trouble.

"You've had a really shitty full moon," Mulan twisted the hose and water started gushing out of it. "Let's loosen up a bit, yeah?"

This wasn't right. The subject's hands trembled as she held the hose.

"It's Gaston's weekend off, so he won't be yelling at me till Monday, if that's what you're worried about." Mulan pointed the hose upwards so that the water sprayed down on them and it vaguely reminded the subject of rain. "And I won't tell him if you won't."

Like the subject was at all capable of telling anyone anything.

"Sorry… that was…" Mulan's face fell and she shut off the hose. "I was kind of joking but… that probably didn't come out right."

Looking over at Mulan, the subject could see that she was feeling torn and guilty. The spray had started to darken and dampen the guard's uniform and some strands of her dark hair had come lose and hung over her temples.

"Please, can we just… loosen up?" Mulan asked, "If you don't blast me with some of the water, I'm going to blast myself. Remember our game? Loser is the one who's most soaked?"

The subject shifted her weight from one foot to the other. She remembered that game, and the fun and laughter that came with it. That brief time had made her scheduled baths actually something enjoyable, almost something to look forward to when Mulan was the one assigned.

"Incoooomiiiing!" Mulan turned the hose on, "I'm going to blast myself now…" She looked over at the subject, "In three." Was she really going to get herself soaked? "Two…" All the other guards did their best to avoid getting wet even if there were probably spare uniforms in the other room. "Boom!"

She actually did it.

Mulan turned the hose around and blasted herself in the face and it actually looked kind of funny. The gush of water destroyed her neat hair, freeing it from its tight bun. After she shut the water, Mulan spluttered and coughed. "Ugh, that's _cold_!"

The strange tension to her cheeks was so foreign and she realized she was smiling. And she had to fight back the guilt that threatened to overwhelm her again.

"Come on," Mulan pumped her chest with one of her fists, "Come at me! Spray me with that shit or I'll spray myself again."

This was so different from the stoic Mulan that the subject had gotten use to in recent years, but the bizarre enthusiasm was… kind of infectious.

She fumbled with the hose before pointing it at Mulan, who dodged and _rolled_ out of the line of the spray before she shot her own blast of water at the subject. It hit her stomach, and she found herself shuffling out of the line of fire and moving the hose to try again at pointing it at Mulan.

The guard was exaggerating her movements, moving out of the way, dodging with great enthusiasm _, rolling_ away. And she was laughing. She was spraying at the subject and evading the subject's blasts of water and it was… _fun_. They exchanged barrages of water and they were… _having fun._

Mulan was breathless and thoroughly soaked when she shut off her hose, "Okay, I think I'm getting pretty winded. Are you good to finish up?"

There was a brief moment where the subject was reluctant to stop. Reluctant to put an end to this game. To put and end to this brief little escape from this world, this life, this existence.

But she remembered her promise to Dr. Gold to cooperate. She remembered that she was a monster. She remembered that she shouldn't even be having _fun_ in the first place. She was supposed to be in chains and locked up and away from human contact because she was a danger to them all. She was a killer and she deserved isolation.

She didn't deserve _fun_.

"Hey, are you okay?" Mulan was upon her now, draping a towel over her and taking her by the shoulders, "I'm sorry we had to stop. If we stay too long, the others will get suspicious."

The subject shrugged. It didn't matter.

"For what it's worth," Mulan said, "You deserve to smile."

She shook her head. That was the last thing she deserved. The guilt came back, more heavily than ever as she pressed her face into the towel Mulan had draped over her.

"Do you ever think about your old life?" Mulan asked.

That was a difficult question. She thought about her old life a lot, but she knew that she shouldn't. The past life she led was as a different person. It was before she knew what a monster she actually was. Whoever she used to be was gone now.

She shrugged and lowered her head.

"I'll just get a fresh gown." Mulan adjusted the towel more snugly before walking over to where a fresh gown had been set aside. She brought it back and hesitated, "I'm going to remove the chain so you can put this on."

The subject nodded, but it still frightened her to be unrestrained for even a moment. She had to resist the urge to dig her claws into her freshly cleaned palms as Mulan unhooked the chain.

"I'll just change into some dry clothes myself," Mulan gestured down at herself, "You can dry and dress yourself."

Wait, Mulan was going to just walk away? Leave the subject unguarded? What if she went wild or tried to run off? In her distress, she reached out and grabbed Mulan by the wrist.

The movement had startled Mulan and she visibly tensed, but her body relaxed as she turned to face the subject. "Yes?"

Without the words to explain herself, the subject could only paw at her collar and look helplessly at Mulan, hoping she would understand the danger of leaving the subject loose.

"Uh..?"

Rubbing at her fuzzy head to keep herself from digging her nails into her hands, the subject stared at Mulan and tried to think over how to tell her what was needed. There was a look of confusion on the guard's face that was frustrating and discouraging.

If only the words weren't so hard to reach.

Maybe… she could try something.

The subject lifted a palm, knowing it normally meant stop, but hopefully Mulan would understand it to mean a request to wait.

Mulan still looked confused but didn't leave. She stayed where she was and looked to the side when the subject started working herself into the fresh gown.

Once it was on, she pointed again at the collar, then at the chain.

"Are you…" Mulan's brow was furrowed as she picked up the chain and clipped it back on. "Do you… Does it scare you to be let loose?"

She shrugged at first, then, meeting Mulan's eyes, nodded.

"I… I want to… I think you should…" Mulan ran a hand through her dark, damp hair to brush it out of her face then looked over to the walled area where guards tended to keep a fresh set of clothes. "I'll just change."

Grumbling to herself under her breath, Mulan walked off. The words coming out of her weren't clear or recognizable. Either she was distorting the words or speaking another language.

With nothing in particular to do while waiting, the subject dabbed at her face with the towel, then rubbed at her hair. It was probably stupid, but she couldn't help but miss the feeling of her hair draping over her shoulders or hiding her face. Not that it mattered much, since being here didn't really give her the means or the time to maintain it. This short cut was efficient and she understood the need for it.

Still, her mind wandered to when she used to wash it and dry it and dye it and care so much about how it made her look and how much Peter and Dorothy would compliment it.

Thinking about them again brought back the pain and the guilt.

Mulan came back with a fresh, dry uniform with her boots and gloves and prod and radio back on her person. The dark strands of her hair were still hanging down around her face though. "I think we should get moving now. We've been here longer than normal."

The subject nodded and turned so Mulan could hook the cuffs together.

"I wish we didn't have to do it this way." Mulan finished up preparing the subject for transport back to her quarters. The towel was left hanging on a nearby hook. "You shouldn't have to deal with this crap."

But she _did_. She brought all of this on herself the day she decided not to listen to Mother. _All_ the days she decided not to listen to her mother. Right from when she insisted on dating Peter despite Mother's protests, all the way up to staying out at night during Headache Week. This was all her penance and her punishment.

"And I… I shouldn't have just… just watched." Mulan's voice was soft, "Watched and did nothing."

The subject shook her head. There was no way to say it and the subject wasn't even going to bother, but she wished Mulan would understand that she had always been the nice guard, which was more than what this subject ever deserved.

A hand on her shoulder guided her towards the door, but Mulan hesitated as she reached for it.

"You had a life before all of this." Mulan's voice was a low whisper as she moved to stand in front of the subject. The guard's eyes darted around a few times before focusing on her, "Do me a favor, maybe?"

The subject titled her head to one side.

"Remember that you were once _Ruby Lucas,_ " Mulan whispered, "And you weren't always 204."

At the sound of that old name, that past name, that name that she hadn't heard in months, that name that she refused to give herself, the subject shook her head violently and backed away from Mulan. If it weren't for the cuffs, covering her ears and curling up would be perfect right about now.

That wasn't her name.

_Ruby Lucas was dead._

"Hey, take it easy," Mulan steadied her when her legs buckled and helped her lean against the wall until the blurred vision could focus and the spinning in her head could still. "I… Maybe you weren't ready for that."

Ruby Lucas was dead.

Subject 204 moved towards the door and looked at Mulan, wishing she could understand that the subject now wanted nothing more than to be alone in her quarters, safe under her bed where she could sleep away this turmoil.

Ruby Lucas was dead.

"Okay," Mulan opened the door, the guilt clear on her face, "Let's get you to your room. I think you have a meal or two scheduled today since they like to feed you more after the full moon, don't they?"

It didn't matter.

Her body was hungry but she didn't particularly feel like eating. She dug her claws into her hands to push back the thought of that name, to kill it all over again, to disconnect it from herself because that was not her anymore and she was not allowed to be her anymore.

As Mulan took them to the room and set up the usual chains hooked up to the bed, she dared to use the name again. "Ruby, I'm sorry. I upset you. I think I said the wrong thing."

Normally, the subject would let things slide. But this was frustrating and this was upsetting and she couldn't keep herself from letting out a warning growl as she dug her claws deeper into her palms.

"Okay… okay." Mulan finished up with the chains and backed out, "I'm sorry."

When the door closed, the subject crawled under the bed and closed her eyes. The feel of her claws was sharp and painful, but it gave her some semblance of control. Splitting the skin on her palms helped split that old name from herself.

_Ruby Lucas was dead._

* * *

At least the car didn't die on its way to Aurora's place. The poor thing was still traumatized after that horrible drive and needed patience and love.

The car.

Not Aurora.

Belle snickered to herself at the thought as she parked in front of Aurora's apartment building, got out of the car and headed inside. Aurora said she was on the second floor, and as Belle made her way there, she couldn't help but notice how new and clean the building was.

Of course, Aurora's door had a dream-catcher hanging on it and a pink and purple welcome mat. Belle didn't even get to knock more than once before Aurora opened the door and let her in. "Hi Belle, you came in at the right moment, I need help finishing this cake."

The place was… well… _lavender_ and _pink_ were the first two words that came to Belle's mind as she looked around. The walls and carpet were hues of purple while the furniture were in the maroon and pink range, some lined with blue and indigo. Some abstract paintings lined the walls.

Then Belle took in that it was elaborately decorated with expensive furniture and even one of those televisions with the curving screens.

"Wait, cake?" Belle looked over to where Aurora was sitting on a bar stool by the kitchen counter with a pink cake lined with strawberries.

"Gran, Gramma and Nana dropped by earlier today and brought me some goodies." A sheepish looked crossed over her face, "Again."

"Like… three grandmothers?" Belle went over to join Aurora.

Aurora served Belle a slice, looking thoughtful. "You know… I'm actually not sure if they're sisters or really close friends or… _gal pals_? Dad never really cleared that up."

Not quite sure how to respond to this, Belle just accepted her slice of cake. "Interesting."

They ate quietly for a while, Belle not quite sure how to break the silence or make conversation. Mulan wasn't due to join them till later in the evening since she had a shift at the facility this weekend.

"I kind of just grew up with the three of them spoiling me every weekend." Aurora spoke out of nowhere and Belle had to take a moment to realize that this was about Aurora's three grandmothers again. "They'd come over the house or I'd be dropped off at their house. We'd bake or go to the zoo or play in the park. They also looked after me whenever my parents had a lot of work to do or a business trip to attend."

"You were really close to them?" Belle finished up the last of her cake and brought the plate over to the sink. "Your grandmothers?

"Yeah," Aurora followed suit, "I can wash that."

Belle moved out of the way and went back to her spot by the counter.

"I was closer to them than to my parents, I think." Aurora said, "They were the first ones I told when I figured out I was bi. They were also the first ones to know when I dated a guy, Philip, in high school."

"I only ever really had my Papa." Belle fidgeted with her phone just to have something to do with her hands. "I lost my Mom when I was just a kid and I don't remember her very well." Belle wasn't ready to bring up more details about her mother and the events that led up to and resulted in her death. It wasn't something she wanted to really dwell on.

"I wonder about Ruby," Aurora put the dishes away, "Mulan said that she once asked Ruby if anyone outside knew that she was in there and Ruby had nodded."

"When I talked to Gold," Belle put her phone away and tried to focus on what Dr. Gold had said and not on how uneasy he'd made her when they were in his office. "He did mention a lycanthrope they had before they got Ruby. I'm not sure if they're related or not. I feel like they are, but it's hard to be sure."

"Can you imagine though?" Aurora asked, "For someone to know that Ruby is there and just… _not_ do anything to get her out? Kind of like Regina and her mom?"

"Maybe they don't know how?" Belle said, "Maybe Ruby misunderstood Mulan's question or Mulan misunderstood Ruby's answer? Maybe something happened to them? It has been seven years after all, since she was detained."

"Maybe…" Aurora looked doubtful.

They continued to make small talk for a while. Belle learned about how Aurora's parents got her the apartment to help her get the hang of being on her own and taking care of herself, although the three grandmothers visited very often. Aurora herself admitted that her path to independence was still a little rocky but she insisted that she was getting the hang of it.

She also talked a bit more about the insomnia and nightmares she struggled with since childhood and how her parents took her to a few doctors before she kind of just started hiding the problem from them and living off of caffeine.

It was strange, _surreal_ even, sitting in Aurora's apartment and making small talk and just… living _normal lives_. Not for the first time, Belle felt twinges of guilt at being able to go home and live this kind of life while people were suffering in that facility, in dire need of help.

As the afternoon dragged on into evening, they ordered pizza (like they weren't tired of it yet) because Aurora was embarrassed about her cooking and wasn't ready to demonstrate for Belle and Mulan.

By the time they heard Mulan's motorcycle rumbling over, the pizza was already starting to get cold. It was a little embarrassing for Belle to be feeling the excitement that she felt at having someone new arrive and able to add to the conversation.

Aurora practically had the door open with Mulan still halfway through her first knock.

"Hi?" Mulan raised an eyebrow.

"Come in," Aurora stepped aside for Mulan to come in, helmet under one arm, a bulging backpack in the other.

"Shoes off, or…?" Mulan glanced from the shoe rack to Belle and Aurora, who were both still wearing their shoes. "Not..?"

"No need," Aurora said, taking the leftover pizza and putting it into the microwave. "What did you bring?"

"Booze." Mulan put her helmet on the kitchen counter and Belle thought she heard Aurora let out a small squeak.

"Because I think I need it tonight." The backpack went on the dining table, where Mulan brought out two bottles of vanilla vodka, two bottles of rootbeer and just when Belle thought everything crammed into that bag was out, a pint of vanilla ice cream appeared. "I normally don't spend this much, but screw it."

"Mulan…" Aurora brought the pizza out from the microwave and served it, "Are you alright?"

Dragging her noticeably lighter bag off of the table and dumping it onto the floor, Mulan took a seat and brought the plate closer to herself. "I don't know."

At the sight of how much Mulan had brought, Belle felt conscious of how she didn't really bring anything and just contributed to payment for the pizza. Maybe next time she could follow Mulan's example and bring something. Not that Belle had expected this to turn into a drinking night. They were supposed to further plan and discuss their next move.

Aurora set aside some glasses with ice while Mulan seemed to realize what was being served to her. "Are you guys not tired of pizza yet?" Then, as if her own words sank in, she doubled back, "But thanks. It's cool. Do I owe anyone anything?"

Pointedly looking at the drinks and ice cream, Belle said, "No, I think you've contributed more than enough."

"Awesome, because I probably spent next week's budget in one night and will hate myself in the morning." Mulan stood up and helped Aurora put ice into the glasses and prepare the drinks.

Just as Mulan was about to pour rootbeer into the third glass, Aurora put a hand over the rim, "I'll have it on the rocks."

For a moment, Mulan's normally calm face broke out into surprise, "Oh?"

"How do you think I got any sleep in college?" Aurora poured the vodka straight into her own glass.

"I didn't drink or party too much." Belle admitted, not quite sure how to be helpful as Mulan prepared and mixed the drinks, dumping a scoop of ice cream into each of the two remaining glasses. "In college or high school. I was more of the textbook nerd."

"I figured." Mulan passed a glass to Belle.

Accepting the glass, Belle watched as Aurora continued to drink her unmixed drink while Mulan added an extra scoop of ice cream into hers. The contrast was… interesting.

Belle was doubtful about being able to drink anywhere near as hard as Aurora and opted to follow Mulan's example with an extra scoop of ice cream and then smooshing everything into each other with a spoon. When she finally got to take a sip it was… interesting. It didn't make her recoil as much as most forms of alcohol did, but it still had a bit of that kick.

"Thanks, Mulan." Belle reminded herself to say.

"Sure." The reply was almost sighed out as Mulan continued to eat her pizza and drink her concoction.

"Were you assigned to Ruby again?" Belle asked, sensing this was what was bothering Mulan.

It took a while for Mulan to reply. She kept her eyes down as she continued to eat.

"Yeah." Mulan finally said, before taking a long swig, "And I think I screwed up."

Putting aside her drink, Belle leaned forward on the table. "What do you mean?" She needed an explanation soon or her mind was going to start sloping down some very dark places. Did Mulan slip up and reach out to the wrong guard? Did Dr. Gold realize they were planning something? Was Ruby being tortured again? Were police due to come barging into their door very soon?

"I used her name." Mulan finished the pizza and Aurora took the plate, "And she… she didn't seem to like it."

"What, like did she freak out?" Aurora asked as she started to wash the plate. "Did it draw attention to the two of you?"

Mulan shook her head, "It… wasn't quite like that."

The questions seemed to be agitating Mulan, so Belle kept herself from pushing and waited instead. It looked like Mulan was still trying to process her thoughts and figure out what happened.

"She kind of…" Mulan gestured vaguely, "Like… she got scared or hurt or… I don't know. I just know that when she heard her name, she looked like she wanted to get as far away from me as possible. Like she got angry with me."

"But why would she be angry with you?" Aurora asked, already filling her second glass. "You didn't say anything else?"

"I don't know." Mulan grumbled and refilled her own glass. "I. Don't. Know."

As much as it was uncomfortable and painful, Belle tried to recall what it was like inside Ruby's head that one night. The other mixed emotions of Regina and Emma had a tendency to distort Belle's memory of what Ruby's emotions felt like, but with enough concentration, it could be brought back to the surface.

The pain was there. The insurmountable pain and grief and guilt.

When they tried to reach for her name, she had denied it. Emma had worded it as something like Ruby feeling like she didn't deserve to have a name.

"I think…" Belle tried to find the right way to express the concept, "She's been there so long... she kind of just…" Fumbling, Belle tried to back track, "She's also been so caught up in her guilt for so long that she… she doesn't think she can allow herself her name? Does that make sense?"

Aurora took a sip as she tried to process it. Meanwhile, Mulan's eyes look troubled and distant as she mixed hers.

"I can't believe I just…" Mulan's jaw clenched and she swallowed visibly. There was tension on her face as she fought through the heavy emotions crashing over her. "Four years."

That was when Belle noticed that Mulan was starting to tremble. She put her elbows on the table and clasped her hands together, pressing her forehead into her knuckles. " _Four damn years_." She breathed out, heavily and shakily.

"Four years, I managed to train myself to keep a straight face and watch as they treated her like that. Four years, I just took orders. Four years, I trained myself to see her as _less than human_."

Belle and Aurora exchanged a glance.

"It's sinking in and it sucks." Mulan ran her hands through her hair and leaned back, staring up at the ceiling. "It's sinking in that this… that 204 was once a human being with hopes and dreams and friends and a _life_ and a _name."_

She shifted in her seat, lightly tapping the side of her fist on the table, "Imagine, what if she wasn't someone I crossed paths with in high school? What if she wasn't someone I didn't vaguely recognize? Would I have just.. just continued to be _okay_ with all the shit they put her through?"

"You can't know that," Aurora seemed to reach over to touch Mulan but held back and hesitated. She recovered by reaching for the bottle again.

"But even before you knew who she was, you weren't particularly okay with what you saw, right?" Belle said, "And you feel uncomfortable with the treatment of the other subjects as well, right?"

"I suppose…" Mulan looked unconvinced and shrugged, "They seemed to treat Ruby the worst though… But some of the other subjects have it pretty bad, yeah."

"How many are there?" It hit Belle that Ruby, Emma and Regina couldn't possibly be the only subjects in that enormous facility. There must be others still, and they must be suffering too. Could they really, in good conscience, free three but leave the rest to continue to suffer their fates?

" _Many_." Mulan answered, her voice stiff as she refilled her glass.

"Should we…" Belle wasn't sure how they were going to react to this, but she knew she herself wouldn't want to leave behind anyone else she may have the capacity to help. "Should we think about helping the others as well?"

This time, Aurora and Mulan were the ones to exchange glances.

"I thought we were going to focus on Ruby and Emma?" Aurora said, "And Regina as well now that we know she's being kept there now too."

"There are scores of other subjects in there. Human-like and not-quite-human-like." Mulan said, "It would take more planning and organization if you want to get more than our three out of there."

This was getting to be so much bigger and more complicated than what she'd originally signed up for but Belle knew it was the right thing to do. She knew that if they took Ruby away, that would just leave the scientists room to pay more attention to the other subjects at their disposal.

They had to either shut the whole place down or take away all the subjects they were torturing.

Or both.

"Let's get all our cards settled first," Belle said, taking it upon herself to put some order into the mess of conflicting thoughts and emotions they were leaving unsaid. "I think we should put together something of a catalog of all the subjects in that facility and find out more about them."

"Not all of them are… _sentient_ though." Mulan stumbled over the right word. "Some of them could be a legitimate danger to the public if we let them lose."

That… was probably a valid concern. It was tempting to suggest saving those that were so-called sentient and leaving those that weren't, but Belle didn't feel comfortable being the type to pass judgement like that. It didn't feel like her place to decide who deserved freedom and who did not.

But releasing something dangerous into the world may also mean doing more harm than good.

Although, couldn't the same be said for Ruby and other lycanthropes? She was realistically capable of great damage and danger, and if Dr. Gold was to be believed, already killed several people. But she clearly didn't deserve the treatment she was getting. And, from what Belle had gotten from the link through Emma, as well as the several interactions they'd had, Ruby didn't seem to _want_ to hurt anyone.

She was also surprisingly in control of herself under the stress and pressure she was put under regularly. Belle recalled the way Ruby kept trying to move further away from Belle when it looked like the shift was threatening to set in.

"I think we should figure out how many subjects they've got in there," Belle said, putting some firmness into her voice after she'd thought over what to say, "And what those subjects are like. Then from there, maybe we could talk again about how we want to play this out."

"I'm guessing you need our help to get that kind of info." Aurora said. "And I should practice my thing more."

"Yes, you should practice your thing more." Belle agreed.

Mulan still looked troubled, but she nodded, "I'll also gather what I can. I have the map ready, I can make another copy and plot it with more details on the subjects we have in our custody. I could also chat with the guys that are assigned to the other levels." A sheepish look passed over Mulan as she shifted in her seat. "Gossiping about our charges is a thing we sometimes do."

"That's great." Belle said, and a sinking feeling came over her as she realized the part that she was going to have to play. "And I'm going to have to keep working on gaining more of Dr. Gold's trust."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This thing is getting to be such a freaking monster and idk what I've gotten myself into like now I have to think long and hard and philosophically about who deserves to be free and who should stay in this place and what these girls should do with their lives now. BLARGH.
> 
> Also, I'm gonna be hella busy this weekend. Saturday I have a booth in a comic book event where I'll be selling one of my comics. Right after that, another sleepover with the cousins and my brother's birthday request is to be dungeon master for a campaign and i'm like SHIT this is my first time being game mommy and now I have to STUDY and prepare. so gOOD LUCK TO ME OMG. So I'm not sure when I'll be able to update.
> 
> As always, thanks for understanding and thanks for commenting and reviewing and hitting me up! If you wanna chat and talk meta, you can pester me on either of my tumblrs (wolfdogonthemoon) (thestefidelly) because freaking out about our faves is always fun.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is rude and I blame my friends.
> 
> Okay no, I take responsibility for the damage this chapter will cause. We've got a reality ensues kind of moment here since Belle and her team are probably getting a little caught up in their Avengers-esque plans.
> 
> In other news, thanks for sticking by this long and I'm sorry for the weekend off. Had a lot to do. I'm also not sure how well I can update this week because I need to work on some proposals and promos and posters for my boss and there's at least one commission I need to catch up on. So I'll see what I can do this week. But again, thanks for all the support.

"So being drunk doesn't stick in astral form." Mulan's fascination rippled across the three of them. "Good to know."

"My exhaustion and sleep deprivation didn't stick either," Belle felt more fascination from Mulan. "When Aurora pulled me in for a trip last time."

"At least I asked this time if you two wanted to try it." Indignation accompanied Aurora's words.

"Aurora," Belle was amused and it was weird knowing that they could probably feel it despite the teasing edge to her words, "You and Mulan were _drunk_. It's still not quite consent."

Embarrassment washed over Aurora then, but she pushed it away, "Fair enough. So… _shall we_? I think I can pull us towards Emma tonight. I can sense her and she has a pretty strong aura."

Belle nodded, as did Mulan.

The lurching feeling in her gut should have been familiar by now but Belle had her doubts if she was ever going to get used to it. A part of her was fascinated though that the lurching feeling she got from being transported by Aurora was similar to what she felt when Emma would sometimes use her own abilities. Specially when linking with multiple people, or that time she pushed Belle into another mind.

Anger- hot and boiling, coursed through them all.

Radiating at the center of it was Emma, screaming and pounding against the door. There was fear thickly coated by her anger, and it was coming from her as she continued to throw herself at the door.

"What's she saying?" Mulan asked, "What's going on?"

"Wait," Aurora's distress hit them all, "It takes more concentration to hear words instead of just feelings."

The feeling was difficult to describe but it reminded Belle of when she was sleep deprived and trying to get her unfocused thoughts to connect. Trying to tune a radio. Trying to remember something you'd forgotten.

"Fuck you, Gold!" Emma was yelling, "You're keeping her here, I know you are!" She continued to pound and kick the door, driving her shoulder into it. Belle noticed blood beginning to stain the door and Emma's knuckles. "You can't just fucking buy her like a dog! Just you wait till I can get out of this fucking shithole!"

"Emma." Aurora spoke out loud, but there was a surge of energy that added power to her words.

It was enough to make Emma stop in the middle of lifting her fist. She looked around, confusion rising to the surface of her consciousness.

"Emma, can you hear me?" Aurora asked, again focusing her energy into communicating with Emma.

Shaking her hands sent flecks of blood over the floor. Emma looked around.

_Can you hear me?_

"Yes!" Aurora's excitement was infectious and mirrored. "I didn't think this would work but whoa!"

Belle wasn't sure if she could be sensed or heard either, but she tried anyway, "Emma, what happened?"

Though Emma's anger was still burning, it was coming down enough for confusion to further take effect.

_Belle? Wait, who the hell else is here? Are you in my head or is this something else?_

"Hi." Mulan was feeling awkward and put on the spot but she made herself known to Emma either way. "I… think you've spent some time in my head."

 _Oh_. Emma's discomfort reached them all. _Hi, Mulan._

There was a moment of awkwardness spreading over them all.

"Belle's been helping me figure out astral projection abilities I hadne't realized I had." Aurora's explanation broke through the shared discomfort.

 _I can give you some tips on how do psychic but I need you to first find out what's going on with Regina._ Emma's anger was coming to the surface again, wrapped up in fear and concern for Regina. _Gold dropped by just now to fuck with my head again. He just kept vaguely saying she needed rest but I could tell he was thinking about keeping her._

This was admittedly fascinating and a part of Belle wanted to analyze how they were making this work. Aurora's astral projection had until now only let her view events in other places. She said herself that she tended to have trouble hearing and deciphering words, though emotions were easier to pick up.

It was possible that Emma's own abilities made it possible for Aurora to communicate with her.

Aurora's _astral self_ brought Mulan and Belle here and they were now all linking with Emma.

It was pretty cool.

 _Belle, you fucking nerd._ Emma was irritated. _Focus._

"We saw Regina the other day," Aurora said.

"They've been keeping her heavily sedated so she can't use her abilities." Belle thought back to the sight of Regina, cuffed to the bed and straining to get lose, reaching for Dr. Hopper and begging for an explanation. "She's not being given much information either."

 _The sick fucking piece of shit._ Emma's anger burned through them all and she slammed her fist against the door one more time before leaning against it. A long scream tore out of her before she slid to the floor. _I'm so done with this place. I refuse to fucking die in here. I'm not going to give him the satisfaction of keeping us all in here forever._

"We're trying to figure out our next move." Belle felt Emma's pain coming through in waves, and it was hard to stay focused through it. "I'm concerned that there may be other subjects who also need help."

 _Yeah, probably. I sense some when they transport me sometimes._ Emma's anger was still there, but she was tired now. Tired and drained and sad. _Do we want to help them get out too?_

"We've talked about it," Belle said, "We want to get more information first. Mulan has some concerns…"

"I basically would rather we don't release Godzilla and do something we're going to regret." Mulan said, "But I get where Belle is coming from. We have to find out more about who we've got in here and help who we can help."

A doubtful look took shape on Emma's face and they all felt her anger and conviction. _I want to take away each and every one of Gold's toys. I don't want anyone or anything else to deal with the shit he puts us through._ Everyone _goes._

"Guys…" Aurora's voice and energy were weak and drained, "I'm starting to run on fumes here."

_If you can, do this again tomorrow. We can practice and figure out what else you can do. If you can, track down Neal Cassidy and Killian Jones. They might have some resources._

Images of two young men filtered through their minds. One huskier and wrapped up in a scarf. The other was taller and leaner with a stubbled face and a large earring.

"Thanks," Aurora said as the connection started to waver.

Everyone _gets out of here. Are we clear on that?_

"Yes." Belle said, just as the lurching feeling pulled them away from the facility and back into Aurora's apartment.

* * *

The weekend was over both too soon and not soon enough. Aurora spent another night practicing with Emma while Belle tried searching the names of Killian and Neal. There were some outdated school articles of a swimmer who lost his scholarship when he was found in possession of illegal substances. That was Killian Jones.

Neal was trickier to find other than some selfies linked to deactivated and obsolete social media like friendster.

Belle figured they should get in touch with Emma to find out more about these guys and how they could be of help. There was a part of Belle that felt uneasy involving other people, particularly people who were most likely Emma's crime buddies. Mulan didn't really like it either. But Belle and Aurora were willing to give Emma the benefit of a doubt and still try to reach out and track the guys down. They could be of help somehow.

That _how_ just wasn't quite defined yet.

Mulan on the other hand was working on compiling a list of subjects she'd encountered or been assigned to. She was checking as well if those particular subjects were still in the facility (and still alive).

They could only do so much with peeking and gossiping though. Belle knew their best bet was to get into the system itself and get the records from there.

And that was going to be tricky since their team consisted of one scientist-in-training, one _psychic_ scientist-in-training, two _imprisoned_ psychics, one guard and a werewolf. An IT guy (or girl) would probably be an invaluable addition but Belle wasn't sure who they could trust and reach out to.

Or they could also look out for a gifted whose powers could affect technology.

Belle wasn't sure if the facility had any of those but she'd heard of them before.

And now, it was time to concentrate. They were in the lecture room, the four of them waiting for Dr. Gold or Dr. Whale to come in and explain the agenda for the day. Aurora and Belle didn't dare discuss Emma or Regina or Ruby. Especially not while Tamara was right within hearing range.

"Good morning, ladies." Dr. Gold stepped into the room. The gauze no longer covered his cheek, and three deep cuts went from cheekbone to jaw. "I hope you all had a lovely weekend."

The idea of even having a weekend away from this place stirred up Belle's feelings of guilt. Meanwhile, Regina couldn't even leave anymore. Emma couldn't leave. Ruby couldn't leave. Countless other subjects couldn't leave.

"I apologize again for my appearance." He gestured towards the cuts on his face, "I had a mild altercation with one of our more _bestial_ subjects." It was important to hide the spark of anger those words brought up. Belle kept her face and body relaxed as Dr. Gold continued, gesturing towards Aurora and Jane. "One particular subject which you, Aurora, and you, Jane, will be encountering today for the first time."

"What type of beast is this subject?" Jane asked, looking intrigued, "Is it purely feral or does it have some vaguely human qualities?"

"There's an interesting answer to that interesting question." Dr. Gold pushed the button and the screen flashed Ruby's file. The motion was so mundane and nonchalant and it made Belle irrationally irritated. "Meet Subject 204. She's a creature that Belle and Tamara have already started studying, but after some thought, we've decided to let all of you play a part in our programs designed for her."

"She looks…" Jane sounded stunned, "Human."

"That's what is so dangerous and deceiving about her kind," Dr. Gold said, "As well as creatures with similar abilities of walking in human disguises. I'll give you all some time to study her file."

It was just about the same as what Belle and Tamara had seen before. The only difference being they updated Ruby's picture and it now showed her tired, gaunt, shaved features.

"Note that the details here are for her human state." Dr. Gold flashed next file about Ruby's wolf form. "Over here we have the details for her wolf state, which she shifts into every full moon. There have been recorded instances though where she has shifted under certain triggers and stimuli often from stress or intense emotions. She's been very controlled in recent years though, which is interesting. Although we have noted that she has also become more feral in her behaviors while in her human state."

"Fascinating!" Jane gasped.

"That it is," Dr. Gold then proceeded to show the overview of Emma, Regina and Ruby. "Now the goal for today is to further develop a link between these three subjects. We ran a test last week where we discovered that Emma is more than capable of linking with 204 and feeling what she feels. Regina on the other hand is more than capable of taking control of the wolf and subduing it."

"But the test ended with both Regina and Emma passing out." Tamara said.

Dr. Gold nodded, "Indeed. So now we want to take things a tad slower with Emma and Regina. Ease them into their task of controlling a creature like 204."

Emma wasn't going to like that. She was probably going to be very uncooperative.

And, Belle realized, it was probably going to be the first time Emma was going to see Regina since that disaster of a testing session. It was uncertain that Emma was going to be able to get herself to stay calm and keep her temper in check upon seeing Regina's condition.

Would she even be conscious enough for this kind of task after they'd been keeping her groggy and out cold for days?

"So today," Dr. Gold continued, "We want to gain a better understanding of the link that Emma can create with 204. We want to expose 204 to various stimuli and have Emma describe that stimuli. Regina will be on standby if the triggers affect 204 enough to transform. If that becomes the case, she will be tasked with pushing back the transformation or taming the wolf after a full transformation. Otherwise, we won't quite need her for this particular session just yet. We'll have her waiting in a separate room."

So they were still going to keep Emma and Regina apart. Belle wondered though if Emma would be near enough to be able to still link with Regina.

"Do we have assignments or areas of focus for this test?" Aurora asked.

"Belle and Tamara will be stationed in the room with 204. Tamara will be in charge of the more physical triggers and Belle will be showing the subject some significant images." It was sickening to think about how Tamara was basically going to be given free reign over shocking and hurting Ruby and Belle had to fight back every fiber of her being to keep herself from speaking out against the ridiculous setup. "Aurora and Jane, you'll be assigned to monitoring the vitals of Emma as well as guiding her through the tests. You won't have to be in the room with her, I prefer you stay in the monitoring room."

* * *

Though the sting of the encounter with Mulan still stuck with her, the subject had given in to her hunger and devoured the meal provided for her. An empty bowl now lay in front of her and she'd licked and wiped it clean, but the hunger was still there. It was always at its worst after a full moon, and though she had no idea how many days had passed since then, she figured the intense hunger would fade to the usual mild hunger soon enough.

The door slid open and several boots made their way over to where she was hiding under the bed. Before they could order to come out, she crawled out. She had resolved after all to be more cooperative. Dr. Gold wanted that and she owed it to him after hurting him during that meeting.

"Good girl, 204." Gaston's snicker made her uncomfortable as he did his work on the cuffs and collar. "That's more like it. Now just behave, we're not quite done. Gold wants an extra bit of security since you've been a cranky little Wolfie lately."

The nickname made her cringe and threatened to stir up memories she really didn't want to dwell on right now. She clenched her hands into fists and didn't resist when they turned her around to face them. A heavy hand grasped at her head and kept it still as something was brought over to her face.

They buckled the thing behind her head as she recognized the muzzle they'd designed for her and often had her use when she was new here. After a while, they just saved it for when they planned a test that needed her in less restraints at close proximity to a scientist.

"Wouldn't want you biting our pretty little interns now, would we?" Gaston ruffled her head before taking her by the shoulder and roughly bringing her outside.

There were three guards around her, all ready with their prods as they escorted her to an unfamiliar area. Not that much of the facility was familiar anyway. They came upon a door, where Dr. Dolphin was waiting.

No… Dr. Shark?

No, that wasn't right.

"Enjoy your meal, 204?" The scientist asked, "Are you sure you wouldn't rather have some fresh meat to satisfy the wolf in you?"

She kept her eyes down, not quite sure how to respond but hoping they weren't going to try again at tempting her with meat. Specially not when she was so ravenous from the full moon.

Whale. That was it. His name was Dr. Whale.

Dr. Whale huffed at her lack of a response before addressing the guards, "Hold her still."

"Yes, sir." Gaston moved as soon as he'd spoke, grabbing the subject and pinning her against the wall. "Secured."

She felt a gloved hand roll up her left sleeve before a needle pressed into her shoulder.

Once Dr. Whale was done injecting her with whatever he had, he walked away, leaving the guards to escort her into the room. She was feeling lightheaded and had to dig her claws into her palms to ground herself.

In front of her were the two new girls. Their names were escaping the subject at the moment.

Beth…

Bella…

_Belle._

Belle was looking concerned as usual as the subject was shoved into the chair across them. The chains hooked to her collar were bolted to the floor. At least the subject was secure this time and Belle would be in significantly less danger.

The other girl didn't look as concerned. More intrigued, maybe. Closer to how Dr. Gold and Dr. Whale usually looked.

Why did the room look so unfocused?

There was a thudding in her chest and a pounding in her ears as her heartbeat picked up its pace.

Still, she made sure to be cooperative and stay still as Belle and Tarara put the scanners along her head.

No, that wasn't the other girl's name. It sounded like that, but it was something else. The memory of being strapped down as they tested her healing abilities came back to the subject and she was able to recall the girl's name was Tamara.

 _Yeah, the bitch's name is Tamara._ Emma's thoughts came in to invade the subject's mind once more. There was something else there too though. She was afraid and angry as well. The subject could make out thoughts of the other girl. Regina. Thoughts of worry and concern.

_She's supposed to be allowed to go home. Instead, they're keeping her locked up here, just like us._

"Let's start with just a mild, low-level shock. That should barely hurt." Dr. Gold's voice came over the speakers. "Tamara, put it at the lowest setting and make it just a brief contact. We just want to see if Emma will feel that too."

_Fuck. Shit. Okay, we got this. I'll stay with you through it._

Emma didn't need to and the subject wished they'd stop sharing pain that the subject was supposed to be facing on her own.

At the sight of Tamara brandishing her prod, the subject felt her heartbeat pick up further and she had to force herself to stay still as it came into contact with her thigh. It jolted her and ran all the way through her leg, but it was thankfully brief and nowhere near as painful as what she was used to.

"Good, good." Dr. Gold's voice filled the room again. "There was a spike in both subjects' readings just then. I believe they've made their link."

Her heartbeat just wasn't settling and though being afraid of hurting anyone was a feeling she was very familiar with and felt on a regular basis, something about it felt different. It was stronger and more overpowering.

It was making her breathing start to speed up too, even if she tried to calm herself and control it.

 _Something is wrong._ Emma's concern washed over the subject.

The subject felt another presence in her head. It was Belle's. Soft and blue and worried. _We want to help you. I feel like Gold wants to trigger a transformation from you._

No, he was testing her. He was always testing and training her to get better and better at fighting the shift. She was getting really good at it.

She just had to breathe properly. Had to focus on calming her breathing and keeping herself relaxed despite the distress that was slowly taking over her.

"Belle, show her the two images. Figures A and B." Dr. Gold ordered.

"Yes, sir." Belle rifled trough the files in front of her and hesitated. She looked over at the subject, her guilt and worry coming through the link they were sharing. _Ruby, I'm sorry._

That name again. She couldn't cover her ears while her hands were locked behind her back, she couldn't hunch her shoulders enough. She couldn't keep being called that name. She didn't deserve that name.

Ruby Lucas was dead.

 _No, she's not._ Emma's energy came in strong, full of conviction and warmth. T _hey've done a good fucking job of tearing her down, but she isn't dead yet. And we sure as hell aren't going to let her die in here._ The strong emotion built up into her anger and determination.

And it was all wrong.

"Belle." Dr. Gold's voice was more firm now.

Hesitant and uncomfortable, Belle pushed two images towards the subject.

And it hit like a truck. It hit like a prod swung at her face or burning electricity through her limbs. The beat of her heart doubled its pace and her hands began to tremble and clenching her fist wasn't helping.

She closed her eyes and looked away, but the images were still burned into her vision.

Peter's smiling yearbook photo. Happy and carefree and full of life.

The alleyway. Blood everywhere. The tattered fabrics and mangled remains.

Now, in her mind, she remembered how the headache overpowered her, how it escalated to her head exploding and her body tearing itself apart and she had no control of herself. She remembered his terrified face and how he tried to talk to her, tried to use her name on a creature that looked and acted nothing like her. She remembered chasing him down that alley way and pouncing onto him. Remembered the feel of his flesh tearing away with her teeth, remembered his scream coming to a gurgling stop as she went for the throat.

She was a monster.

"The readings we're getting from 204 are nearly identical to the readings we're getting from Emma." Dr. Gold's voice came through the speakers once more. "Emma even let slip the images she saw and some of them are exactly the images that were presented to 204. This test is going rather well. Prepare to show her the next two pictures, Belle. But wait for my instruction."

Her heartbeat was banging violently against her chest and it was becoming painful. Blood was spreading over her palms and dripping through her fingers as she dug her claws in and struggled to keep the wolf from coming out.

It was hard to breathe.

 _Ruby, try to think about something else_. Emma's presence made itself known once more. _Let's get through this together. I don't remember my parents, but I remember when I first felt like I belonged. When I first teamed up with Neal and Killian._

A growl rumbled in her throat. She opened her eyes and shook her head, trying to shake off the presence. Trying to get rid of the ridiculous voices in her head. The uninvited attempts at comfort she didn't deserve.

Ruby Lucas was dead.

They had to stop calling her that. She didn't deserve that name. She was a monster. She was a serial killer just like Granny.

 _Was this your Granny?_ Belle's voice was uneasy as she wormed her way into the subject's head and showed a mental image of some papers. There were words and numbers, but some pictures were there as well. Pictures of a very familiar arm with some very familiar scars.

One picture showed Granny as the subject remembered her. With the fluffy white hair and the sharp eyes and the strong look to her features that commanded respect. Those eyes though. Those bright eyes always made her feel good.

Another picture showed Granny completely different from what the subject could recall. The hair was gone, shaved close to her head and the eyes were dull and tired and the face was grey and wrinkled and drooping and exhausted. At the bottom of the picture, there looked to be the hint of a collar similar to what the subject wore.

Was Granny in here somewhere? Were they running tests on her too? Had they cured her yet?

 _Ruby…_ Belle's presence was heavy with sorrow and guilt. _She's gone. Their tests became too much for her and they lost her about nine years ago._

Granny was a serial killer who murdered people and destroyed lives. She was notorious for many deaths and she was taken away for what she did. She was brought here and they tried to cure her. They probably did their best.

So why did it hurt so much to think about Granny going through the tests that this subject was going through?

The pain in her chest was becoming unbearable and her head was now starting to weigh her down with pounding inside her skull. Blood was coating her hands and dripping onto the chair. Breathing was difficult. Air wasn't coming into her lungs fast enough and the muzzle was making it hard to open her mouth wide enough to take in deeper breaths. Her chest was burning up and her head was burning up and her eyes were burning up.

"Dr. Gold, I think she's having trouble breathing," Belle was speaking out loud now and moving towards the subject. Which was the opposite of what anyone with common sense would do.

The subject growled then, warning Belle to keep her distance.

"Her vitals are spiking but she's not in the red yet." Dr. Gold said. "Show her the next two images."

"But-"

"Belle, we had an agreement."

"Yes, sir."

Everything was burning up and she had to stay in control, but it was like her body was working against her. Fighting it back felt like there was a wall she had to get through.

"Tamara, get her to look at the images."

A shock to her thigh jolted the subject's body before a hand roughly took hold of the back of her head. "Look at it, 204, or I'll give you another shock that I'm pretty sure 223 can feel as well."

 _That bitch._ Emma's anger was burning through the subject. _I'm going to fucking zap her with that thing the first chance I get._

Opening eyes she hadn't realized she'd closed, the subject looked down at two more images and it became all the harder to breathe and the pain in her chest doubled.

Dorothy, smirking in her yearbook photo, cocky and confident and _alive_.

The classroom. Dorothy's limp body half covered by the broken shelf.

"This is good." Dr. Gold was saying. "Emma continues to exhibit similar symptoms and readings. They're at a milder level, but they're definitely coinciding with 204's."

This was too much. She didn't want to dwell on this. She couldn't dwell on this. The pain in her head was overpowering and she tried to stand up and move away but the chains kept her confined to her seat. Tremors were going through her and she couldn't still herself.

Her eyes were burning and painful. Her skull was splitting apart. Her jaw was stiffening, her teeth was breaking through her gums.

* * *

Something was wrong. Ruby was trying to get out of her chains, but her panicked movements seemed more halfhearted and tired than anything else. Her breathing was loud and wheezy as she struggled to get enough air through the muzzle.

And she was so pale.

 _Belle, do something._ Emma was scared and struggling against her own cuffs. It wasn't possible to see through the wall between them, but Belle could feel it. Emma was distressed and angry and afraid.

She couldn't quite feel anymore what Ruby was feeling, but it had been intense. The brief time that Emma had been able to maintain a wavering connection between them had made it hard for Belle to keep her composure while Tamara just eyed and touched Ruby like she was prey.

There was so much going on and Belle felt her stomach churning as she tried to stay in her seat.

Whatever Ruby was going through was taking a heavy toll on Emma. She was getting tired and drained, which was starting to overtake the fear and distress.

_Something is wrong. Her chest hurts. Everything hurts but her chest pain is intense and I'm trying to ease some of it out of her but I'm not sure how much of it I can hold. I'm getting lightheaded as hell. And I almost want to throw up._

Just as Emma thought those words, a sick retching sound came from Ruby as she doubled over, vomit slipping through the sides of the muzzle, all over the table and the floor.

Enough was enough. Belle stood abruptly and rushed over to Ruby, yanking the muzzle off so she could breathe properly. She was wheezing and gasping and she doubled over and threw up again and there was bile and half-digested chunks.

Holding on to Ruby's shoulders, Belle could feel the intense tremors running through her body. And from her new vantage point, she could see the bloody hands cuffed behind Ruby's back. Dark and red and all sliced up.

Something was wrong and Belle didn't know what to do. There were hitches in Ruby's breathing now and she was pale and cold. Her eyes were glowing yellow and some of her teeth were sharp, but she couldn't seem to get through the transformation, or she was fighting it.

Then her eyes rolled back and she went limp, body slumping forward in the chains.

No no no _no_.

Not aware of if she was thinking or talking, Belle didn't care for protocol anymore. She unclasped the chains and moved Ruby to the floor. It was disconcerting to realize how light she was. The horror set in when Belle couldn't find a pulse.

Before Belle could move to administer CPR, Dr. Hopper came bursting into the room, followed by several assistants. He tilted her head back and moved her chin to open her airway before starting to pump his hands against her chest. The assistants set up the defibrillator.

Hands on Belle's shoulders moved her away from the team and she was too dazed and stunned to fight back as a guard escorted her out.

* * *

She was tired.

Very, very tired.

Playing doctor in the basement was always tiring. Mother didn't join them this time. She and Granny had a fight and Mother walked out. So Granny played doctor with her granddaughter alone.

And now they were both very tired.

But they were wrapped up in bathrobes and blankets and Granny made hot chocolate and was giving her cookies for breakfast. Mother wouldn't approve, but at least Mother wasn't here. She was out doing whatever she did when she left to be alone.

It was nice having the hot chocolate. Granny even put marshmallows and whipped cream! If this wasn't the best morning ever, then she didn't know what was. This more than made up for how tired she was feeling after the long night.

"You feeling better, dear?"

She nodded vigorously then licked her lips, realizing she had a whipped cream and hot chocolate mustache.

Granny had an arm around her and kissed the top of her head. "There's something I want to explain to you, but I'm not sure how."

That was weird. Granny always knew what to say. She knew everything! Someone old and wise and sweet and funny and tough and fearless like Granny knew all the things that needed to be known. There was nothing she couldn't explain.

So this was weird.

"What's that Granny?" She asked, scrunching up her face in confusion.

"Sometimes, things can get very complicated." Granny's thumb rubbed small circles into her granddaughter's shoulder. "It can be very hard to understand the world around you, specially when things happen very fast."

"Yeah," She nodded solemnly, "Like Math."

Granny laughed then, and gave her another kiss. "Kind of like Math, yes. But maybe a little different."

They were quiet for a while as Granny thought over what to say.

Then she reached over and picked up one of the cookies and showed it. "Look at this." She showed the bottom of the cookie. "When you look at it from this side, it looks like there's barely any chocolate chips, right? And it looks flat and kind of boring."

"Yeah," She could kind of see that. "And it's a bit darker?"

"Yes." Granny then turned the cookie over. "Now on this side, you can see the big chocolate chunks and it's all nice and squishy, yes?"

She wasn't sure where this was going and she would rather just eat the cookie than observe it, but she could kind of see that Granny had a point about the two sides being different. "Yes, Granny."

"Please, try to remember that things that are hard to understand are going to be just like this cookie." Granny continued, and the seriousness to her tone was strange. Was this about more than just a cookie? "I feel like things are going to be very different very soon, and I'm going to need you to remember what I told you. Many people are going to insist that one side is the only side. Please don't forget there's always another side."

"Okay, Granny."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> r u ok


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm coming down with a cold and it is not fun.

The atmosphere hanging over the table was heavy and thick with their varying emotions. They sat together, food untouched, eyes glazed over.

That was how Belle felt anyway.

It was difficult to process what she'd just seen. Difficult to accept what she'd just witnessed. Difficult to live with the uncertainty of whether or not Ruby was going to get through whatever they'd done to her, whatever they'd given her before they wheeled her into the room, whatever they were doing to her right now to keep their precious lab rat alive for tests on another day.

This was getting so out of hand, Belle wondered how it all escalated to this point or if it was always on this horrible high of a nightmare.

"So did you see if 223 passed out as well?" Tamara was the one to break the silence. "What was her heart rate? 204 looked like she was having a cardiac arrest. Did the same happen to 223 or did she unlink in time or did she just pass out?"

"She couldn't maintain the link, I think." Aurora was the one to answer, but her voice was soft and barely more than a whisper. "Because her readings stabilized just before 204's went red."

"Fascinating, isn't it?" Tamara wouldn't shut up. "How 223 insists on maintaining the link despite the discomfort of it and the threat to her health. It clashes with the reports we have of her lacking empathy for others."

 _Shut the fuck up, Tamara_. Was just at the tip of Belle's tongue. She put her elbows on the table and pressed her forehead into her palms.

"204 didn't look very good, though." Jane was next to speak. "She looked so thin and pale and that muzzle was awful. Was it on her last time you saw her?"

"Nah, she was secured more firmly the last few times and far enough away from us the last few times." Tamara answered because Belle couldn't get herself to bother. "I think they wanted that safety measure since they were expecting her to either shift or lose control."

"When Dr. Gold said that they were going to expose 204 to stimuli," Jane's voice was more hushed now. "I didn't think it would be to that extent. To the extent of… _of that_."

"What's the big deal?" Tamara's tone was irritated. "She'll heal from that, I'm sure. Her healing abilities can get her through some intense injuries. What I want to know though is if we can transfer that to 223. If through the link, we can somehow build 223's healing and strength and senses if they just link long enough, intensely enough."

"I suppose that would be quite the breakthrough." Jane sounded hesitant, but did entertain the thought. "Her condition is transmittable though, isn't it? Through a bite or an exchange of blood?"

"Yes," Tamara answered. "But they haven't quite figured out yet how to transfer just the abilities and not all the side effects like the uncontrollable aggression or the feral tendencies or the whole wolf thing."

Belle stifled a groan as she curled her fingers over her hair and tried not to dwell on how clinical Tamara managed to be about this whole situation. How could she sit and talk about theories and act so sure that Ruby was going to bounce back?

If anything _Tamara_ was the one with a severe lack in empathy.

"I'm looking forward to the next time we can try a similar test." Tamara's mouth would not stop running. "I really want to see how strongly we can link those two. Imagine the possibilities!"

"Dammit, Tamara." Belle slammed her palms down onto the table. "Shut the hell up, will you?"

"Why should I?" Tamara's fists were clenched and her tone was low, "You're the one who keeps running their mouth. Gold eventually gave up and set up some fake program so you can have your little snacktimes with 204 and finally just shut the fuck up."

"The program I'm working on with them is not fake!" But the words had cut into Belle and a part of her wondered how much truth might be in Tamara's jab. "And there's nothing wrong with having some _basic fucking human decency_ for these _prisoners_ they call _subjects_."

"Belle, take it easy." Aurora reached over to touch Belle's arm but she shrugged it off.

"There's _everything_ wrong with getting in the way of research and study!" Tamara was standing now, "You're fucking soft, feeling bad for those creatures."

"Oh yeah?" Belle found herself standing up now too and working her way around the table to stand in front of Tamara. "You're fucking _insane_ for not having any sense of empathy for them!"

"They are _not_ human." Tamara was easily taller than Belle, and she was clenching her fists like she was more than ready for a fight. "You're out of your mind. You're like those insane activists wanting to pull animals out of testing. Can't you see the progress we can make? Didn't it sink in at all that Gold has saved lives with the blood of 204 and her kind?"

"I'm not denying that they saved lives." Belle felt her voice getting louder and she had to stop herself from screaming out her next words. "But I do disagree with the _extreme_ measures they've taken to get to that point."

"The end justifies the damn means, Belle." Tamara reached over and roughly rapped her fingers on Belle's forehead. "Get that through your thick fucking skull."

"It does not!" Belle swatted Tamara's hand as she felt her face heating up. Amidst the boiling anger, she found herself clenching her own fists. A part of her was scared of this intense rage burning through her right now, but the rest of her just wanted to scream and thrash and burn this place to the ground. "The means make a difference! The people they saved from death doesn't justify or cancel out the _torture_ and _death_ and _humiliation_ they put their test subjects through."

"What part of _saving lives_ isn't getting through to you?" Tamara's arms were up as she gestured with big movements that made Belle flinch. "You're fucking _blind_!"

This conversation was just going in circles but Belle was too angry to pull herself out of it. She wasn't just angry at Tamara, she was angry at Dr. Gold and Dr. Whale and Dr. Hopper and the assistants and the guards and the investors keeping this place running and just every damn thing about this damn place was _infuriating_.

"You're _insane_ , Tamara." Belle knew she was going to hate herself later for how she kept giving in to personal jabs. "I don't understand how you can't feel _anything_ for the subjects. They're people too. They're human beings with feelings. They have fears and dreams and we're making their lives a _living nightmare_!"

"Fuck you, Belle." Tamara spat, shoving Belle backward.

It was tempting.

So very tempting.

Belle wanted to shove Tamara back. Shove her hard enough to make her fall backward. Shove her hard enough so she felt something other than the sick fascination she showed towards these trapped and tortured human beings.

"What?" Tamara shoved Belle again. "Are we done here?"

"Hey." A guard had forced their way between them and had a hand on each of their shoulders. Belle realized it was Mulan. "Take it easy, you two."

"Don't fucking touch me." Tamara swiped Mulan's hand away.

"Just take a seat and calm yourself down." Mulan's voice was even as she eyed Tamara, then looked over at Belle. "Both of you."

Tamara didn't look ready to back down and continued to glare at Belle, almost daring her to say something or do something to escalate the confrontation into a full-blown fight.

Belle didn't even know how to fight. She avoided violence.

And it disturbed her to think that there was a part of her now that really wanted to make Tamara hurt.

Before anything could escalate further, the pantry door opened and Dr. Gold walked in. He stopped in his tracks as he took in the tension in the room. Eyebrow rising up, he looked from one face to the other. "May I ask what's going on?"

Mulan put her arms down and stood at attention.

"Tamara and Belle almost started fighting." Aurora was the one to speak and Belle shot her a look. And realized everyone was now looking at Aurora, too. She shrank under all the eyes on her. "But at least they're calming down now?"

Dr. Gold's brow was furrowed but he nodded at Aurora, then looked over at Mulan. "Go back to your post."

"Yes, sir." Mulan nodded and stiffly walked away.

"So… Belle, Tamara, please sit down." Dr. Gold waited for Belle and Tamara to move back into their seats before he walked over to their table. "After today's… _intense_ session," He had paused to find the right word and Belle felt herself trembling. The _intensity_ of the day was weighing down on her and she wanted to just go away and be alone first. The _intensity_ of the day put Ruby's life at risk. "I feel that a debrief of sorts is in order."

Belle realized she was trembling and it was making her stomach churn and her legs shake. She hoped it wasn't visible.

As if she noticed Belle's distress, Aurora reached over and took Belle's hand and squeezed. It wasn't enough to stop the trembling but it did help to feel the warmth and softness and comfort that it brought.

"204 is… an _interesting_ creature." Dr. Gold said, "She has the capacity to be a very dangerous individual. She killed a classmate in an alley before going rabid in a classroom, where she killed several students and a teacher. Just about everyone else in that room was severely injured if not heavily traumatized. The pictures are crime scene photos from her records before it was settled that she would be confined here."

"But she looks so…" Jane fidgeted with her hands. "She looks so frail and drained now… and is she… did she survive?"

A solemn look was over Dr. Gold's face now as he put a hand over his chest and Belle had a hard time seeing sincerity in his gesture or in his eyes. "She had a close call but Dr. Hopper has stabilized her. Given her superior healing abilities, she should be able to recover very soon."

"When should she be good for testing again?" Tamara asked and Belle had to swallow the groan and the scoff that just needed to come out. "We got some great findings from her link with 223 today."

There was that stupid gleaming smile again as Dr. Gold seemed amused by Tamara's enthusiasm. "Patience, Tamara. It's likely best to let her rest and recover in her quarters before we run any sessions like that with her again. She'll probably be given a week or so. We underestimated the drain she had from the full moon."

"Shouldn't her rations be increased maybe?" Jane asked. "She looked emaciated. That may have also contributed to her collapse. I assume the transformation during the full moon burns her body out?"

Dr. Gold nodded, though his smile looked more stiff now. "Right you are, dearie. We tend to give her increased rations before and after a full moon. I'll probably have a talk with the other heads about possibly increasing her rations just a little more."

The trembling had eased a bit, but Belle still felt sick. And even if she'd more than washed off Ruby's blood and vomit and removed the stained lab coat, the smell still seemed to linger and the feel of it still seemed to linger.

"I want you to spend the rest of the day as well as tomorrow preparing a report on today's session. The data we gathered can be found in your accounts, so you can spend your time in the computer room working on your observations and hypotheses."

How Belle was going to be able to stay clinical and not write _'YOU SADISTS ALMOST KILLED RUBY'_ was beyond her. She doubted that any amount of thinking would be able to calm her enough to see that session as anything other than a mistake and a selfish game.

After thinking about it and taking in the symptoms that Ruby was feeling and what Emma described, Belle was pretty sure Ruby had been given a shot of adrenaline of some sort before they threw her into the room. The odds had been stacked against her. She was starving and weak and still recovering from the full moon. Something like adrenaline when her body was on such a low and her mind already on such a high? What were they hoping for?

And Belle knew they were hoping for a transformation. That's why the chains and the muzzle were there. That's why Regina was on standby in a nearby room.

They wanted to force a transformation out of Ruby when she wanted nothing more than to stay in her human form and be separated from her wolf form.

"Belle?" Dr. Gold's voice pulled Belle from her whirlpool of thoughts.

"Sir?" She kept her voice neutral even if she wanted nothing more than to spit it out.

"She should be good for another session with you maybe on Thursday or Friday." Dr. Gold's offer felt hollow as Belle thought again about Tamara's biting words. "It might help her recover faster to have an encounter that can bring up morale a bit."

It felt like she was just being used to keep Ruby feeling just a little bit better and just a little bit more willing to not die.

And it felt sickening.

But Belle had to smile and nod and say, "Thank you, Dr. Gold."

* * *

She was tired and her entire body felt sore. Her muscles were limp and heavy and even if she wasn't strapped down to a bed and hooked up to an IV, she probably wouldn't have been very willing to move or go anywhere.

If only she could just sleep herself into oblivion.

The thoughts and emotions running through her were so hard to process, she just wanted to get away from it all. She wanted to get out of her own head and her own body and just not feel and not think anymore.

But she didn't exactly deserve that.

She ended lives and she broke families. Peter's parents would never see their smiling, laughing boy again. Dorothy's dog would never cuddle up to her or walk with her again. Mr. Spencer's family would never have him at their dinner table again.

There were more.

But she had such a hard time remembering that she wasn't sure anymore who she'd killed and who she'd injured and who she'd left to wander through life with the trauma of seeing a monster take down a room full of students and a teacher.

But what about Granny?

A memory was hovering before her eyes, of what Granny had said about cookies.

Growing up, the subject had thought back to that a few times, thought about finding the other side to a situation. It was helpful when Mother was being difficult and unreasonable. It helped to try and see things from Mother's side of the cookie.

Other times, she wanted nothing more than to discard the concept. It was a concept tied to someone who murdered innocent people. It was a concept tied to someone who caused the kids at school to whisper about her behind her back. It was a concept tied to someone who turned her back on their family and left her to be alone with Mother.

But now, she didn't know what to think anymore. What to feel anymore. She didn't know if she knew anything anymore. Everything was so difficult to comprehend and she just didn't want to deal with anything anymore.

Granny had been a bad person, right?

Just like the subject was a monster?

They both deserved the treatment they got from this facility, didn't they?

But no matter how hard she tried to comb through her memories of Granny, she hardly ever found one that was explicitly bad. There were memories of being scolded because of bad behavior. Memories of being snapped at for being irritating.

And yet, there were still so many memories of being cuddled and kissed. Memories of baking and getting to lick the spoon and attempting to stuff the whisk in her mouth and stealing the cookies before they'd cooled and giggling when chocolate was all over her face and wiping ingredients all over each other and laughing together.

How could that same person be the one who killed everyone?

And there were still reports of people going missing long after Granny had been taken away.

She couldn't think about this. She couldn't dwell on this.

If she were to maintain any semblance of peace with her situation, she had to accept that Granny was a monster just like the subject was a monster. This place was doing everything in its power to cure monsters. It was using money and manpower and resources to run tests, test treatments and gain better understandings. They were training her to gain better control of the wolf. She rarely ever had transformations outside of the full moon anymore. That was all thanks to the training and treatment they were giving her.

If she just hung on a little longer, maybe they could get the monster out of her. They were probably very close now, that's why they'd been so intense lately.

And they were taking care of her. They were letting her rest and heal right now.

She had to trust them and believe them.

There was nothing left of her but trust in them and she had to hang on to that.

* * *

It was taking a great deal of energy, but they were somehow managing to make it work. They were working on refining their technique and it was working.

Aurora had now managed to bring Mulan and Belle to Emma, and Emma had been able to link them all together. To decrease the strain it was taking on Emma and Aurora, they'd figured out a way to draw energy from Mulan and Belle. They didn't have any psychic ability, but they did have an aura and an energy that Aurora and Emma were able to draw strength from. It just took some concentration to keep themselves clear and open to the feeling of energy being sucked out of them. It made their heads feel heavy and their stomachs feel hollow, but it helped maintain the strength of their connection.

And it had given Aurora and Emma the strength to include Regina now too. She was still being heavily sedated, but that actually helped make it easier for Aurora to reach her and pull her over to where they congregated somewhere between Emma's room and Emma's head.

"We can't take any longer than we have to." Belle said, still not over the sight of Ruby looking so pale, with bloodshot eyes as she vomited into her muzzle. "I don't know how much longer Ruby can live through what they're doing to her."

"I think it's getting worse." Mulan said, her guilt still weighing heavily on her, "She's been here so long and given them so much… And I think Gold is just losing his grip. He's been a lot harder on her lately than I've ever seen."

 _Of course he's losing his fucking grip._ Emma's anger still burned as hot as Belle remembered. And she noticed the pain radiating in Emma's knuckles and the fresh blood on her door. _He's on a huge powertrip and he likes having the control he has over us all. And now that he's got some new games to play because that Tamara bitch keeps giving him fresh ideas, he's just fucking lost it. He's_ drunk _on it._

 _He's had Ruby and myself in his possession for too long._ Regina wasn't trying to mask her fear anymore. They could all feel it in the twists of their stomachs and the tightness in their throats. _I never got to make any friends or build any connections. Nobody is going to come looking for me. The only thing that got me through all his tests and his pressure was that I'd be able to go home and sleep. I don't even have that anymore._

There was also something about being connected like this that made their conversations more raw and unfiltered. You can stop yourself from saying something on your mind, but you can't stop your mind from thinking what it's thinking.

And it tore at Belle to hear and feel the terror and pain that Regina and Emma were going through.

 _Just get us out of here_. Emma's thoughts were hard and edged. _Your pity won't get us anywhere, Belle. But your actions will._

"But what about your friends? Neal and Killian?" Mulan's suspicion could be felt by everyone and Belle hoped it wouldn't agitate Emma. "How would they be of help?"

 _Killian's got connections. He'll be able to help us hide because you know that once shit comes raining down, we're going to have to disappear for a bit._ Emma's anger wasn't directed at Mulan. It was just this ball of rage surrounding the facility. _Neal knows computers and he has some power. He's one of those dudes who kind of just kept making lights go out when he's upset. As we started working together, he got a better grip on it and it became a great help during our runs._

Mulan's judgement hung in the air, but they all felt her suppress it.

_They should be able to help get us out._

"But why didn't they help you get out before?" Aurora asked.

 _Lacked the resources and I lacked a means of communicating with_ _them_. There was a part of Emma that did sting at how Killian and Neal let her take the fall for their botched job, but she still valued them, and she tried to understand their reasons for not coming for her. _Aurora, before you go, I'm going to help you figure out what their aura is like. That should be able to help you find them._

Belle recalled seeing Aura Reading among the notes on Emma's file. It was an ability that tended to be tied with empaths, but other psychics tended to have it too. Aurora hadn't quite had much practice with it, but at least Emma was going to be able to guide her.

"Wait, are we really going to go into hiding?" Mulan was hesitant and they felt the concern she had for her brother. "Become fugitives?"

"What if we went public instead? Exposed what they were doing?" Aurora was also reluctant to change her lifestyle.

Belle really didn't know how any of this was going to play out. She still didn't know how they were going to tackle the issue of getting all the subjects out or focusing on Ruby, Emma and Regina then coming back for the rest. "Going public might make it easier for them to track us down, but harder for them to catch us without making a scene."

"But they regulate phone usage. We can't take pictures and release stuff. They'd catch us the moment we bring out our phones outside of the lecture room." Aurora said.

_Neal should be able to get their records online. He was good at that hacky stuff._

_So the idea is to get Neal and Killian to be part of the plan?_ Regina was doubtful and afraid, but she seemed to know that there wasn't much of a choice. _Would they be willing? To take such a risk? And are we sure on the decision to go public if Neal is able to get his hands on the records?_

"I'm not sure." Mulan was worried about the backlash and any of it falling upon her brother. "But it might give us another option than going into hiding and running away."

"Okay then." Belle knew the confidence she tried to stir up wasn't quite there yet. She was scared as well. Scared that none of this was going to play out as planned and that it was all going to end in disaster somehow. But she knew they all had to try. They couldn't rest easy until the people being held captive in the facility were free. "We'll finalize a gameplan after we've gotten hold of Neal and Killian. From there we should be able to figure out our next move since by then we'll have a clearer picture of what we've got on our team."

* * *

Closing her eyes brought her back to her memories. Opening her eyes still brought her back to her memories. They were all she had left of her past life as Ruby, and part of her just wanted to be rid of it all. Wanted to just live this day to day life of testing and feeding and bathing and sleeping.

And yet, part of her still hung on to that life. Still clung to the memories. Still hurt at the crimes. Still lifted at the happy memories. Still longed for that life to come back.

She _couldn't_.

Ruby Lucas was dead.

This was the subject's life and it wasn't going to change anytime soon.

The door opened and she felt her heartbeat pick up, accompanied by the beeps of the machines. She kept herself calm, reminded herself to accept that she couldn't do anything while she was strapped down to the bed. They were doing their best to help her and cure her.

It was Dr. Gold who entered and he walked straight over to stand near her head.

"How are you feeling, dearie?" He reached over and started to stroke her hair. "You gave us quite the scare." His thin fingers made her scalp prickle and she wasn't sure what to feel about it.

But she knew she felt bad about messing up the session. She looked up at him and wished he knew how sorry she was. She had tried to cooperate, she really did.

"Your body is healing itself quite nicely and we should be able to move you back to your quarters tomorrow." Dr. Gold's tone was light and friendly as he continued to stroke her hair.

She did miss hiding under her bed. The lights always felt like they were too bright and it wasn't always easy to fall sleep here.

"I must say, 204." His hand tensed up, pinching at some of the strands. "I'm disappointed in you. That session did not end the way we'd hoped."

 _I'm sorry_. The words wouldn't come out and she couldn't figure out how to get them out and she couldn't look down or look away because of the grip he had on her.

"We had an agreement, didn't we? You'd be more cooperative?"

With his grip on her hair, she could only make the smallest of nods.

"What happened back there, then?" The beeping machines filled the room as her heartbeat picked up, but it wasn't loud enough to block out Dr. Gold's words. They were softly, calmly spoken but they still hit their target. "You left quite a mess to clean up, 204. And there was the whole business of reviving you."

Guilt washed over her at the inconvenience she'd caused.

"I must admit though," Dr. Gold's grip softened and he brought his other hand out and pressed his palms against her cheeks. "I'm relieved you pulled through. It would have been _devastating_ to lose you, especially after all the progress we've made."

The beeping machines were starting to calm and her heart was starting to calm.

"You know…" Dr. Gold's thumbs stroked her cheeks and it made her uneasy but she knew better than to shake him off. "I don't recall I've told you yet, but these tests we work on together, they're not only so we can cure you."

They weren't?

"We've also cured several other people." Dr. Gold let go of her face and reached behind him or in his pocket somewhere, then brought out a picture and showed it to her. It was of a baby with a smiling couple. "The mother of that child would be dead if it weren't for us. Our tests on your healing were able to give us what we needed to cure this woman of her cancer. Five years later, she now has a child and a bright future ahead of her."

She had done that? The monster had been part of saving lives?

"Hers isn't the only life we've saved." Dr. Gold put the picture away. "There are many more to come as we standardize the treatment across all hospitals."

It was hard to believe that somehow, she had played a part in saving lives instead of destroying them.

"Do you understand why I'm telling you this, 204?" Dr. Gold said, "I need you to keep hanging on, dearie. We need you to stay alive so we can keep many more people alive."

This was the other side of the cookie.

One side was the hardship she was going through for them to find a cure for her.

The other side was the cure she was part of developing to save many lives other than her own.

With this better understanding, the subject nodded her head. She was ready for more tests and was more than willing to take whatever they would deal. It was all so they could heal people and save people and keep families intact.

This was the penance she needed. This was the way things were meant to be.

* * *

"The way Emma explained it," Aurora was saying from her spot in the backseat, "And from what I'd researched, everyone gives off an aura, and it's unique to a person. Like a fingerprint."

"Slowly start switching lanes," Mulan was manning Belle's tablet and consulting google maps while Belle had waze on her phone on top of the dashboard. "We'll be coming down that exit soon."

"So is aura reading something that both you and Emma are capable of?" Belle checked the mirrors before inching her way to the side. After the disaster of letting Aurora drive her car, Belle knew she was going to have to be the designated driver. And it wasn't like they could all pile on top of each other and take Mulan's bike.

"I think it's something that most psychics are capable of," Aurora said, "And just takes more concentration for some than others. The aura that Emma showed me of her friends was a bit hazy, but I should be able to get a better reading on their location once we're in Boston."

"I still can't believe you both managed to give Gold some bullshit excuse to not show up to work tomorrow." Mulan took a sip of her coffee. "The exact same day that I don't have a shift. Do you think he'll notice?"

Keeping her eyes on the dark road ahead, Belle reached for her own thermos on the cupholder and took a sip of the tea she'd packed. "I don't think he'll notice that we're away the same day you are, but he'll definitely notice Aurora and I both being gone."

"I still can't get over how frail she looked." Aurora's voice was quiet and stunned. "It's different, seeing it myself. I know I saw it in my dream and I know I saw the picture you showed me, and I got glimpses of her from you when we link with Emma but… seeing her… seeing how shattered she is… it's heartbreaking."

Tightening her grip on the steering wheel, Belle tried not to dwell on the sight of Ruby vomiting into her muzzle and how the image of that continued to haunt her.

"They're slowly killing her," Belle said, "Mind, heart, body, _everything_."

Mulan pointed at an intersection up ahead. "Turn right over there. We're getting close to the hotel."

"Great, because I've been holding in my pee for the last hour."

"Aurora, it's only been like a bit more than a two hour drive." Belle signaled as they drew closer to the intersection, then turned. "And didn't you go before we left your place?"

"I have a tiny bladder and I've been drinking coffee the whole way."

Belle rolled her eyes but couldn't suppress a smile. Aurora had her quirks and yes, the driving incident was still weighing heavily in Belle's mind, but Aurora had her heart in the right place. And she was a major part of whatever plan they were going to develop to get the subjects out of there.

"Left at the next intersection." Mulan continued to guide Belle through the streets of Boston until they finally got to the hotel that Aurora had managed to book for them at the last minute using a credit card that Belle was quite sure Aurora's parents were the ones paying for.

Not that Belle was judging her. She just knew that her own father had been very doubtful and very concerned when she said she was basically going on a roadtrip to Boston with some friends from work. Vaguely lying and saying it had something to do with their research at work felt slimy but Belle wasn't ready to tell Papa about the plans they were making. She doubted Mulan had told her brother about anything either.

As they pulled into the driveway of the hotel, Belle had to remind herself to stay calm as she handed the keys to the valet. Hopefully he would treat the car with more respect than Aurora did.

They checked in easily enough and found themselves in a room with two twin beds and a desk. Mulan was about to insist on sleeping on the floor until Aurora insisted that they could share one of the beds. Belle didn't particularly care if she was sharing a bed or having one to herself.

Once they were settled in, Aurora lay back and closed her eyes so she could concentrate on tracking down Neal and Killian's auras. While she was at it, Mulan started laying her notes down on the desk.

"This is what I've gathered so far." Mulan showed Belle a map of the facility with numbers where she'd marked the quarters of the subjects. "From what I know, most of the subjects are kept confined to their quarters. Some of them get free time to walk or exercise, a few have some visitation rights. I know there are a couple of psychics that are outpatients but I figured they're not something to worry about for now. So I focused on making a list of those that are confined. Note though that not all of them are exactly _human_."

* * *

**PSYCHICS**

* * *

**Subject 189**

Name: Zelena Green

Location: Level B2; Room 012

Notes: She's some psychic being detained similar to Emma. Doesn't seem to have any family either since she doesn't have visitation rights.

* * *

**Subject 201**

Name: Regina Mills

Location: Level B2; Room 025

Notes: They're keeping her heavily sedated. We'll have to cut her off of that supply at least a few hours before we launch.

* * *

**Subject 223**

Name: Emma Swan

Location: Level B2: Room 002

Notes: Her room is closest to the elevator so we could probably free her first.

* * *

**Subject 222**

Name: Sidney Glass

Location: Level B2: Room 007

Notes: He's an older guy. Doesn't talk or fight back much.

* * *

**Subject 224**

Name: Elsa Arendelle

Location: Level B2: Room 021

Notes: They consider her a psychic but she basically has ice powers. Her cuffs have a blocker of some sort that keeps her from using her abilities. When they test on her, they have a remote that deactivates the blocker.

* * *

**SHAPESHIFTERS**

* * *

**Subject 170**

Name: Kenai

Location: Level B4; Room 001

Notes: Shapeshifter like Ruby, but doesn't seem to have the super healing. Has a bear form and a human form.

* * *

**Subject 202**

Name: Elinor Dunbroch

Location: Level B4; Room 007

Notes: Bear shapeshifter as well, very cooperative. I rarely see her in bear form.

* * *

**Subjects 212; 213; 214**

Names: Harris, Hubert, Hamish Dunbroch

Location: Level B4: Room 008

Notes: Bear shapeshifter triplets, sons of Elinor. Roughly thirteen years old. Excitable and rowdy. Harder to control than their mother. Tend to shift more than their mother. Might be transferred to their own separate quarters soon.

* * *

*None of the bear shapeshifters above seem to have healing abilities like Ruby

* * *

**Subject 206**

Name: Merida Dunbroch

Location: Level B4; Room 006

Notes: Went to Storybrooke High. Daughter of Elinor. Has less control of the shift. Very angry and aggressive.

*Gold seems interested in Merida but doesn't experiment on her as much as he does with Ruby

* * *

**Subject 204**

Name: Ruby Lucas

Location: Level B7; Room 015

Notes: She's located at the lowest floor and will be the hardest to release because of how deep in she is.

* * *

**CREATURES**

*I'm hesitant to release these into the world

* * *

**Subject 172**

Name: Nessie/Loch Ness Monster

Location: Level B7; Tank 005

Notes: No idea how we're going to get this one out

* * *

**Subject 173**

Name: NA

Location: Level B7; Enclosure 009

Notes: They call him a Tikbalang and seem to have imported him from Asia. He's some kind of half horse half human creature. Aggressive.

* * *

**Subject 215**

Name: NA

Location: Level B7; Enclosure 011

Notes: They call this one the Jersey Beast. Very dangerous.

* * *

**Subject 225**

Name: NA

Location: Level B7; Enclosure 013

Notes: This one is a Bigfoot. They used to have more, I think. This one's new.

* * *

**OTHER**

* * *

**Subject 217**

Name: "Ape Man"; refers to self as Tarzan

Location: Level B3; Room 005

Notes: They say he was taken from the jungles of Africa and was raised by apes there. They've run tests where he can actually communicate with lab apes.

* * *

Belle felt her blood run cold as she took in Mulan's list. The familiar name stood out and brought her back to the fidgety young woman who shared during interviews her struggles with anxiety and how it was made worse by her telekinetic abilities, particularly her "ice powers".

And she remembered telling Gold about Elsa. And sending Gold a copy of her thesis.

With her legs threatening to buckle under her, Belle sat down at the edge of the nearest bed.

"I heard that we had mermaids for a while. And at least one unicorn." Mulan was still looking at the list. "I'm not sure if we still do. I'm still working on finding out."

As if also torn up about the sight of the subjects, Mulan moved to look out the window. "Merida was in my school, too. She was in the same year as Ruby. And I think they were brought into the facility around the same time. I don't know if that's related."

"Whatever Merida has seems to run in her family though, doesn't it?" Belle kept her voice steady but she felt hollow on the inside and lightheaded. "Her mother and brothers are all in there."

"Their family is one of the ones with regular visitation rights. Mr. Dunbroch comes to see them every weekend and they ask a lot of questions that Gold manages to always have an answer to." Mulan kept her eyes out along the skyline. "Merida gets her visitation rights taken away sometimes. When she lashes out. The brothers have also been getting into more trouble as they've gotten older."

Talking about the Dunbroch family was helping Belle avoid the thought of Elsa. Avoid the possibility that Elsa was stuck in the facility because Belle had led Gold right to her. "If the boys are about thirteen now… how long have they been in the facility?"

"They were there already when I started." Mulan answered, shoulders stiff as she kept her gaze focused on the world outside their hotel room. "So at least four years. Maybe more."

A heavy silence rested over the room for a while.

And Belle knew she had to deal with the possibility of what she'd unwittingly done to Elsa.

"I think Elsa ended up in there because she was part of my thesis." Belle admitted it out loud, more to herself than to Mulan. "And Gold read my thesis."

"I remember she was very scared when she was first brought in last year. A little after Emma was detained." Mulan sighed and moved over to sit on the chair. Her jaw was clenching and unclenching and her eyes were shiny. "She's still very fearful. I don't get to interact with her very much, and she's treated relatively well since she has a sister on the outside who visits every weekend."

"I definitely want to help her get out." Belle owed that much to Elsa, especially if Elsa really was found and detained because of Belle's research.

Mulan didn't answer right away and Belle sensed there was still the hesitation of who they were going to free and who they were going to leave.

Instead, Mulan changed the subject, "As I understand it… about Merida, I mean." She rearranged the papers and notes on the desk. "Merida has more abilities than her mother and brothers. And the assistants and scientists think that an infection from Ruby spread to Merida. That, I think, is why Gold is interested in her, but can't treat her like trash the way he does with Ruby because Merida has a whole family looking out for her."

"Knowing Gold's fascination with Ruby and what he can do with her abilities, he must be very invested in what happened to Merida." Belle hesitated, thinking over the timeline of what she knew about Ruby. If her understanding of it was right, it was the incident in the classroom that led to Ruby's capture. "Was Merida in the classroom? That day Ruby lost control? When she got caught?"

Mulan shrugged. "I don't know. I'm rarely assigned to their floor." She paused then, before taking a deep breath and continuing, "We're really not told much about our charges' pasts. They prefer we only know what we're up against if an attack is a possibility. They'd rather we don't get to know who we're guarding and don't form any attachments."

"But you did." Belle said, knowing the guilt Mulan carried for being so complacent to the brutal treatment she'd had to witness over the course of her work. "You _did_ form attachments and you're now working on freeing them. That counts for something, right?"

Mulan shrugged and kept her eyes on the papers.

"I found them." Aurora sat up so fast, Belle was startled into scrambling off the bed. "I know where we can find them. Like right now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE AVENGERS WILL FINALLY ASSEMBLE


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That YOLO moment when you write assuming the story is taking place more or less in realtime but then talking meta with konako makes you come up with a slightly different date for the events of the story. For all intents and purposes let's just pretend this shit's happening August-ish, 2017

When Aurora led them to a bar, Belle hoped they weren't going to start drinking on the job again. She wasn't particularly keen on having to maneuver the group back to the hotel if Aurora got herself hammered and tried to influence Mulan to do the same.

But Aurora didn't disappoint, because as they got inside, they spotted Neal hunched over a table on one side of the bar and Killian approaching from the other side. They both seemed to be fixated on a man in a suit looking over his phone. The man seemed to be growing frustrated with whatever was on the screen and put his phone down. That was when Killian sat next to the man and seemed to be making conversation with him.

Neal now stood from his spot and started approaching the man. It was just as he was starting to walk past them that Mulan placed herself in front of Neal. Belle hadn't even realized that Mulan had walked on ahead.

Then she noticed Mulan's hand on Neal's wrist, and Belle noticed the man's phone in Neal's hand.

Knowing this could but hoping it _wouldn't_ lead to trouble, Belle, accompanied by Aurora, worked her way through the crowd to wear Mulan and Neal were stiffly staring each other down.

"I'm only going to say it one more time." Mulan's voice was low, "Give it back or I will."

Neal's face was set with annoyance but as he looked over to see Belle and Aurora coming over as well, he seemed to force the tension out of his body. "Fine." Flashing a forced smile, he pulled his wrist free from Mulan's grasp and turned over to the man in the suit. "Excuse me, sir. I think you dropped this."

The man in the suit was surprised as he took the phone back, then he smiled, "Thanks, man!"

"Sure." Neal maintained the stiff smile until the man turned to continue the conversation he'd gotten engrossed in with Killian. "Excuse me, ladies."

"Hold on." Mulan refused to move out of the way. "We want to talk to you. About Emma Swan."

At the mention of Emma's name, Neal's smile fell and what looked like genuine concern came over his features. "What about her? Is she okay?"

"Not exactly." Belle hoped the aggressive stance that Mulan was using wouldn't make things harder than they had to be. She used a calm, polite tone as she spoke to Neal and he looked at her like he was torn. "And she needs our help. She said you can affect technology."

Chewing at his bottom lip, Neal put his hands on his hips and looked down. "Okay." He looked up, glanced to the side. "Okay, let's find somewhere to talk." He led the way out of the bar, looking back at them several times to make sure they were following.

He led them down to an alley and it was probably not the brightest idea to follow a known criminal around at night. Belle noticed though that Mulan was keeping one of her hands in her jacket pocket, probably holding her pocket knife.

"Okay, we're good here." Neal turned to face them. "Killian and I were supposed to regroup here." His eyes darted around before focusing on them. "No cameras, few witnesses. We can wait for Killian or you can start telling me what's going on."

They hadn't quite planned out how to approach the duo about this. Belle glanced over at Mulan, who kept her hands in her pockets. Aurora was uncomfortably looking around.

"Emma's being held at Baelfire Research Center." As Belle spoke, she noticed Neal wince visibly before setting his jaw and looking off to the side. "Regardless of her past, we believe she's not being treated humanely."

Neal had his hands in his pockets now as well and he merely grunted his response.

"There are several other subjects there." Belle continued, "And at least one almost died this week. Many have already had their lives taken by the experiments being run over there."

"Yeah." Neal nodded stiffly, his jaw still clenched, his shoulders still tense. "Sounds about right."

"What's going on here?" A male voice came from behind them and they turned to see Killian striding over. He was easily taller than them all. "And what are three lovely ladies doing in a dark alley at this time of night?"

Belle didn't consider herself someone capable of aura reading and definitely didn't want to be the type of person who judged people and wrote them off. But Killian seemed like the kind of guy Belle would be wary of.

There was good in him of course, and he probably had his heart in the right place. Maybe it was just being in an alley at night with two men that was making Belle uneasy and uncomfortable. That and among their trio of women only Mulan was capable of fighting. Aurora carried pepper spray at least. Belle… was kind of just here.

"They knew Emma." Neal was the one who spoke up before any of them could. "Said she might need our help."

"Oh yeah?" Killian raised an eyebrow and looked down at them. "Last I heard, she was moved from prison to some research place. Thought we wouldn't be hearing from her again."

Though the words sounded cold, Belle guessed there was some regret in there that Killian was trying to hide. "She's asked for you two. We've driven all the way here to ask you to help us get her out."

"Emma said you'd have connections we might be able to use." Aurora said, "And that Neal has some technology-related ability that we can use?"

"I wouldn't mind making some connections with you though," Killian winked at Aurora and Belle felt Mulan stiffen.

Putting a hand over Mulan's arm, Belle hoped they could keep this conversation as civil as possible. "The point is, we want to help Emma and several other subjects being abused in that facility. We want to get them out, and Emma said that you'd be able to help."

"You got any idea how tight security is over there?" The more they talked about this, the more uncomfortable Neal looked. "Cameras, guards and locked doors everywhere."

"Of course we know." Mulan's tone was low and she didn't bother to hide her annoyance and suspicion. "We all work there."

Neal stiffened then, frowning and looking over them. "Really? As what? And is that how you met Emma? Were you testing her, too?" The accusing tone made Belle wince because there was truth to it. They had indeed played a part in testing on Emma and the other subjects.

"Mulan's a guard." It was Aurora who spoke up. She gestured towards Mulan then towards herself and Belle. "The two of us are part of an internship program Dr. Gold accepted us into."

An uneasy silence followed.

Belle thought over what to say next but felt like she was coming up blank. Mulan on the other hand was still tensed up and suspicious.

"No." Neal shook his head and started to walk past them to join Killian.

"No?" Belle felt her heart sink. "What do you mean _no_?"

"It's too risky." Neal kept his eyes averted. "We don't want anything to do with that place."

"We've got our own plans to figure out." Killian added as he brought out a cigarette and lit it. "We can't get caught up in something as high-profile as breaking into a government-funded facility." He blew a puff of smoke at them, "So ladies, if you'll excuse us…"

They were turning to leave. This wasn't how things were supposed to pan out.

Belle reached for Killian's shoulder as they started to walk away. Then things happened so fast, Belle didn't know how she ended up with her back pressed against the wall and Killian's forearm across her throat and a knife dangerously touching her side.

"Let her go." Mulan had reacted just as quickly, pressed up close to Killian and holding her own knife just under his stubbly chin. "Now."

Killian's eyes were cold and hard as he weighed out his options and glanced at Neal, who kept his hands in his pockets and his gaze averted. The seconds that passed weighed heavy with tension and Belle didn't dare speak or breathe.

Then Killian's face softened and he chuckled, moving his arm and his knife away from Belle and keeping them up, level with his head. "I like a girl who knows her way around knives."

Mulan didn't let go of Killian immediately, in fact she tightened her grip on him and the knife looked like it was pressing deeper into his jaw. "I knew we couldn't trust criminals like you."

"And you think Emma isn't a criminal too?" Killian let out another laugh. "We were making it big when she was still with us. The stuff that chick could do is more than what Neal and I can do combined. None of our jobs back then could have been done without her. So you tell me, how you sleep at night knowing you're going to help a criminal escape from her prison."

That got to Mulan. The tension in her body was clear as she pulled Killian even closer.

"Mulan, let him go." Aurora was the one who took it upon herself to talk to Mulan and slowly approach her. "If they won't help us, we can't make them."

For a while, tense, heavy breathing filled the alley. The noise of cars and chatter further down along the street was barely audible over their pounding hearts. It was scary and the air was thick with anticipation for what was going to happen next.

Finally, Mulan shoved Killian forward. He stumbled but recovered, avoiding a collision with Neal.

"She was counting on you." Belle tried one more time as Killian dusted himself off and turned around, nudging Neal forward as well. "She needs you."

They were walking away.

"You were the first people she could really consider her family!" Belle shouted after them, desperate now, and she thought she saw them falter. "She thinks about you two a lot. She looked up to you."

They were gone now.

"She trusted you…" Belle sighed, shoulders slumping as the weight of disappointment washed over her.

"Maybe we can try again tomorrow…" Aurora was hugging herself and looking just as let down as Belle felt. "I could also try to visit their dreams… Although I'm already really drained after searching for them so I'm not sure if I can."

"Let's just get to the car and go back to the hotel." Mulan pocketed her knife and started to walk forward, shoulders hunched, head low. "I want to sleep."

Maybe tomorrow would be better.

* * *

It was nice to be back in her room, back under her bed.

But it wasn't nice to have the IV taken out. Whatever they had used to keep her sleepy was gone and now the memories and thoughts pressed harder and harder against her head. Memories of being Ruby Lucas bombarded her with thoughts of Granny being a good person, thoughts of Mother being very cold, thoughts of doubledates with Peter and Dorothy and Merida, thoughts of being human.

But she never had been human, had she?

Those hazy memories of playing doctor in the basement and playing with big dogs… that was her as a wolf among the wolf forms of her mother and her grandmother.

Ruby Lucas wasn't real.

The subject had always been a monster and always would be.

If Belle and Emma and Mulan and all of them could just stop calling her that, it would be so much easier. She had already left that name behind a long time ago. Why did they have to torment her with it now? She didn't deserve that name. She didn't deserve any name. She was not human and she never was.

She looked up when the door opened and crawled out before being told to. This was one way to be more cooperative. Preparing herself for transport before they had to order her into position. She wanted to be good and cooperative.

"Hello, 204." Dr. Gold waited for a guard to finish setting up a chair before he sat down. "Don't worry yourself, we don't want to stress you with more tests just yet. Take a seat."

Caught off guard by this, the subject stared at Dr. Gold for a moment, not quite sure if this was real or some sort of test. That sounded like they were going to give her a short break from testing. Was that really something they would do?

"I assure you, 204." Dr. Gold's smile was warm as he gestured towards the bed. "You need to rest and recover. We won't be running tests for a few days. Please, sit down."

If she just had the words, she would have thanked them, showed them all her gratitude for being given some time to rest. Even if her chest no longer warmed up and tingled as it repaired whatever went wrong on the inside, she was still feeling very fatigued.

She sat down and hoped a small smile would convey her gratitude.

Smiles felt so odd on her face. Her muscles weren't used to it and they felt stiff.

"That's a good girl," Dr. Gold nodded his approval. The scars on his face hadn't quite healed yet and the subject still felt guilt at causing them. "I just want to have a talk before I get some sleep myself."

What did he want to talk about? Had she done something wrong again?

"Belle and Aurora were both absent today." His smile had fallen and his face looked less warm as he rubbed at his chin. "I'd rather not assume the worst of them but I fear they may have gone out jobhunting. That last session took a toll on them and I hope it wasn't heavy enough for them to really want to leave."

 _Oh no_. The subject knew how much Dr. Gold valued Belle and if she was really thinking of getting a different job because the subject had botched their test, then hopefully there was some way she could make up for it. Maybe another test? She would do whatever she could do behave and cooperate and do good.

Dr. Gold shrugged. "It's also possible that they're just being the twenty-somethings that they are. Maybe they wanted to go out drinking late and slept the morning off. I don't really know."

For some reason the subject thought about age and how she couldn't tell if Belle and the other interns were her age or older. So they might actually be older.

Not that she knew her own age anymore. Maybe she was nineteen or eighteen. Seventeen at the youngest, probably. If she was human she would be starting college. Maybe something in the culinary field since cooking with Granny had always been fun. Although Mother usually got upset when she caught her daughter going through the food in the refrigerator. The meat in the freezer was also usually off-limits.

"I realize you've had a difficult couple of days, 204." Dr. Gold was speaking again and seemed to be fumbling with something in his pocket. "We were conducting some very new tests lately and maybe you've been a little overwhelmed."

The subject shrugged and looked down at her scarred hands. It wasn't her place to say if the tests were too much. Her purpose was to take what they dealt because they all knew best. They were the ones who knew what they were doing.

"Here," Dr. Gold tossed something her way and she instinctively caught it. "Happy twenty-second birthday."

What?

She stared blankly at him, stunned.

"I was going through some of the clutter in my office and I noticed we missed your birthday last Sunday." He pulled out a device and showed her the screen, where a calendar flashed the date as August 23, 2017. "So I apologize for being a few days late to greet you."

He had never greeted her before. Not that she could recall.

And it was bizarre now to know that it was 2017. That she was twenty-two years old. That she'd been here for a very long time. She didn't know what to feel.

"I'll have an extra meal brought to you." Dr. Gold was standing up now. "I hope you'll put in more effort to cooperate from now on, considering how long we've been taking care of you."

It felt like she was nodding someone else's head. She felt detached from herself, like she was viewing the scene through a glass or a monitor.

"I'll see you soon, 204." With that, Dr. Gold left the room and a guard retrieved the chair.

She was twenty two years old and it was her birthday several days ago. It was 2017 and she didn't know what was going on outside, which celebrities were still popular, what movies were out, what phones were like, what ipods were like, what junk on the internet was like, what social media was like and if what she used was still being used, what neopets was like and if it was still active.

Not that she needed to see the outside world again. She needed to stay here and be fixed by the team here.

Whatever went on outside this facility wasn't important.

But she couldn't help but wonder about it.

The thing in her hands was small and it smelled leathery. She looked down at it and felt lightheaded.

It was tattered and faded, the leather and thread giving way. Stains all over it were most likely blood. And the metal plate was rusty and darkened, but the engraved name was still there, still readable as " _Wolfie_."

Memories of Peter and Dorothy ran through her mind as she closed her hand and pressed her forehead into her fists, feeling like her head was too heavy to keep upright.

This was from so very long ago.

If only she could just go back to that moment. Be back at that table, be back among the two people she valued the most.

Her eyes were warming up, but she knew this time it wasn't because of the wolf. Dampness spreading over her hands confirmed that.

If she could just sit there again.

Be at the old dining table in the dark and dilapidated kitchen that never felt foreboding when her friends were around.

She could feel the table in front of her, smell the rust and wood and meat in the kitchen. There was Peter's warmth wrapped up in hers. He always liked to put his arm over her shoulders and kiss her forehead. She could feel the way his hair always felt stiff and sticky because of all the product he put in it. It was kind of gross but she could appreciate the effort he put into his appearance and she knew that she herself used to think a lot about what to do with her hair and her face and her clothes. And Dorothy was there with her smile and her snark. She would bring Toto sometimes, even if Mother hated the smell of another dog in the house.

And they were together and it felt good to be together.

She wished she could speak to them, tell them how sorry she was.

Curling up on her bed and clutching the bracelet tightly, close to her face, she tried to think of all the words she could use to tell them how much she missed them and how horrible she felt for what she did to them. She thought about how she would beg them to forgive her even if it was the last thing she deserved.

She could barely see their faces now, but she knew that they wouldn't be smiling anymore if they could hear her now.

She didn't know how they would react, if they would forgive her.

But they probably shouldn't.

And yet, it still tore at her, the longing for them. If she could just feel them piling over her and laughing with her again… If she could just hold them close again… If she could just line up their stupid bracelets as they clasped hands again…

They were gone.

Peter was dead. Dorothy was dead. Ruby was dead.

Pressing her face into her fists, she struggled to stifle her sobs.

* * *

They didn't sleep well last night, though they didn't talk as a group much either. There was a bit of conversation as they tried to talk Aurora out of invading Neal and Killian's dreams. After that it was an uneasy sleep. Belle woke a few times to Mulan and Aurora whispering to each other. Some talk about doubt and guilt and fear. Belle tuned it out, not wanting to eavesdrop or interrupt.

That and she had needed to be alert enough to drive them all home after checkout.

They stopped over at a gas station for Aurora to have another bathroom break before they continued on the rest of the trip and pulled in to Aurora's driveway. Mulan helped Aurora carry her bag up to her place while Belle checked on her car to make sure it wasn't cranky from the trip. Once she was satisfied that everything was in order, she went up to join Mulan and Aurora.

Belle found them sitting at the dining table.

"What now?" Aurora asked as Belle took a seat across them.

"We have to keep going." Belle leaned back on her chair. "I would prefer to get them out like this month. We know the layout of the place and we have a list of some of their subjects. We might have to leave some of the creatures for now and maybe come back for them later."

"So we prioritize Ruby, Emma and Regina?" Mulan asked, "What about the Dunbroch family? And Elsa?"

"Let's prioritize that group as the first batch we pull out of the facility." Belle felt heavy thinking about the big job they had ahead of themselves. "And I'd like to go back for the more if possible."

"Are we still thinking of going public somehow?" Aurora asked.

Belle thought about it. Last they discussed the topic, they were leaning towards going public. At the very least to make it harder for the facility to cover their tracks since they seem to be pretty good at it. "I'd like to, yeah."

"I haven't tried it yet," Aurora looked from Mulan to Belle and back, "But I talked to Emma again and we were wondering if the energy drain we managed to do with the two of you can be used to make people fall asleep."

This was news, and potentially good news at that. "Meaning if you can do that, you'll be able to get the people at the facility to fall asleep?"

"Maybe." Aurora sounded hesitant. "I'll try to see if I can and see if I can get the hang of it. If you and Mulan are okay with me trying it later."

Belle glanced at Mulan. "I'm okay with letting her try it. You?"

After a moment of thought and a shrug, Mulan nodded. "Yeah. I'm up for it."

They had to finalize their plan soon. Belle thought over what they had now and what they still lacked. Someone with access to the system would have been invaluable but they didn't have that right now and they probably couldn't get someone like that without risking discovery of their operation.

They had a guard who provided them with a layout of the area and possessed a keycard that gave her access to most of the facility. They had someone who could telepathically link their minds and essentially provide open communication within the team. They had someone who could move and manipulate objects and even living beings.

That was it!

"I think that if you can't do it yourself, you should be able to do it with Regina's help." Belle was still formulating the theory of how it could work, but she spoke out loud as she tried to figure it out. "She's capable of manipulating matter, right? But she's also capable of some biokinesis. Maybe, and I'm not sure yet and you'll have to talk to her about it yet, but maybe…"

Aurora sat up straight as she caught on to where Belle was going. "She could give them the physical symptoms of sleepiness and I can be the one to pull their consciousness into a dream! Belle, that's perfect!"

"One problem though." Mulan leaned forward, "They've been keeping her high on their cocktail mixtures and she hasn't been able to use her powers. Maybe only during tests if ever. I heard some assistants talk about working on blockers for her powers. We'll either have to address the sedatives or the blockers or both before Regina can be of help."

"For the other psychics with blockers, like Elsa," Belle said, "Do you have access to the remotes that deactivate them?"

Mulan shook her head, "Usually, no. But I think I know where the assistants and scientists keep at least some of the remotes."

"Will you be able to get them?"

Letting out a breath, Mulan seemed to be bracing herself before she nodded. "I'll work on that."

"Mulan, I've only been there at night like three times, and those times were on the full moon. Is it generally more quiet at night?" They would have better chances of success if they did this at night. Belle remembered there being significantly less people during the evening and the lobby barely had any lights.

"Yeah. There are hardly any tests done at night." Mulan paused to think. "I know it's only really during the full moon that there's a lot of activity after hours. In general, I'd say that at night, there will only be several assistants and maybe two scientists if any. They turn off the lights on some floors, though the cameras have night vision. Ruby's floor and room always have the lights on."

"Always?" Belle asked.

"Always. It's an actual rule in our handbooks." Mulan's brow furrowed and she looked downwards. "If I remember right, I asked about it one time. I don't know if it's true, but the rumor is that they think she might be stronger in the dark, so they keep her quarters bright."

That was… interesting. Belle couldn't imagine living her life in a room with the lights always on. With the lights everywhere always on. Wasn't that disorienting? Any concept of time was probably gone. It must just feel like an endless day of tests and rest and more tests again in a wretched eternal cycle.

For seven years.

"She draws power from the moon, that's proven." Belle wasn't sure why she felt like arguing the lack of sense in keeping Ruby's quarters always bright. "But I don't recall seeing in their notes that she draws power from darkness."

"Aren't the notes they give you filtered though?" Aurora asked.

"I guess, yeah…" It just… felt all wrong. The concept didn't seem to make sense.

Mulan picked up the conversation before they could trail off or get sidetracked, "But yes. There are still a lot of guards and quite a few maintenance workers, but there are definitely less assistants and scientists at night. Our best bet really would be to strike at night. If they've developed the blockers for Regina then I should be able to deactivate them. Then she and Aurora can get the guards and staff inside to go to sleep. From there, I should be able to escort Regina, Emma and Elsa outside."

"I can go and get Ruby," Belle stopped, remembering her updated pass only gave her access to some of the testing rooms. She still didn't have access to the lower floors where the subjects were kept. "But I might need a guard's pass to get to her quarters."

"I think I can get you one once you've gotten past the guards that Aurora and Regina have put to sleep. After I've gotten Emma, Regina and Elsa out, I could go back for the Dunbroch family. Maybe you and Ruby can meet me on their floor."

"Yeah, I think that could work." The plan was starting to take shape, but Belle felt like there were things they were still missing and key parts that could still go wrong. "What about the cameras?"

Mulan rubbed the back of her neck. "That's another problem. I can probably spike Walter's thermos, the guy who watches the monitors, but the monitors aren't the only output for the cameras. I know Gold has the security system hooked up to his phone. So we'll have to move very fast or separate him from his phone or take care of him ourselves."

What _take care of him_ entailed was a question mark Belle wasn't particularly sure she wanted to know the answer to just yet.

"Do we know where he lives?" Aurora asked.

"What so we can kill him in his house?" Belle looked at Aurora, appalled.

Aurora looked just as appalled by the suggestion. "What? No! So we know how long it'll take him to get to the facility if he notices us on the cameras."

"He'll probably call the police instead of driving to the facility himself." Mulan pointed out.

A moment of silence hung over them as they thought over their options.

Static coming from the television caught their attention, followed by a voice. "Hello? You girls over here?"

They exchanged looks, all showing a mixture of doubt and confusion. Didn't they leave the television off? And why did the voice sound familiar?

"Is that Neal?" Aurora was the first to stand up and start approaching the television.

"Dammit, what were your names again?" Neal's voice came over the television again. "Look, it's me, Neal. We want to talk."

Belle stood from her chair and walked over to join Aurora in front of the television. Mulan followed, tensed up like she was ready to face anything that would prove to be dangerous.

There, on the television screen was Neal. He was in a sloppy-looking apartment with clothes and miscellaneous electronics all over most of the available surfaces. Killian was in the background, laying on a coach, eyes glued to his phone. Or hopefully it was _his_ phone.

"Well now that you're all here, let's start over and introduce ourselves, maybe?" Neal pointed behind him. "I'm Neal and that's Killian."

"I'm Aurora and this is Belle and Mulan." Aurora pointed them all out before taking a seat on the coach in front of the television. "Is there any particular reason you're somehow talking to us through my TV? Or maybe could you tell us how you even found my TV?"

Neal put his hands over his face and exhaled before he straightened up in his seat and clasped his hands on the table in front of him. "I can manipulate technology, and I can also gather the information that they've gathered. Long story short, I tracked you down via security cameras and the hotel's system and it took me a while to find you."

"Ask them about Emma." Killian called over from his spot on the couch.

Nodding, Neal gestured towards Killian again. "That's why we're reaching out now. Tell us more about what's going on with Emma and what it is you three are planning to do."

"In general, the subjects are being treated pretty badly over there." Belle sat next to Aurora while Mulan stayed standing. "Emma has been put through tests against her will and I've seen a guard strike her at least once. Other times I've seen her with bruises."

At the sound of this, Neal's features hardened.

"And there are other subjects there that have it worse. We believe that Emma is going to be put under more pressure as time goes on." Belle tried to be as brief and as clear as she could. "Things have already started to escalate."

Neal bit his lip while his fist fidgeted on the table. "Okay." He shifted in his seat. "Okay, tell me one thing first."

"What's that?" Aurora asked.

"Why?" Neal said, "Why now? Why do you want to help Emma? You all work there, right? What made you turn your back on that place and decide to screw your boss over?"

That was a loaded string of questions, but Belle understood how they essentially could be summed up to _Why are you doing this?_ And Belle had several reasons and Ruby was the biggest reason, but honestly? If Emma and Regina hadn't reached out to Belle then things would not have steamrolled into what was going on now. If Emma hadn't been using her abilities to try to find out more about what the other subjects were going through… if Emma and Regina hadn't been secretly communicating with each other… If Emma hadn't pushed to find out more about Ruby… things might have played out differently.

It was Emma, really, who set everything in motion.

It may have been Regina who first reached out to Belle and who first convinced Emma to talk to Belle, but it was Emma who wanted better for herself and for Regina and for the subjects she barely knew anything about. It was Emma who was fighting for better treatment. It was _Emma_.

"Because she asked." Belle felt like the answer came out to simple, but she tried to organize the jumble of thoughts into words. "She and another subject, Regina, reached out to me. They opened my eyes to what it's like for them. They showed me that behind the glamor of the magic and the prestige of scientific pursuit, there were very real human beings being treated like lab rats. And that isn't something I'm going to be able to sit well with anymore."

Just the thought of how naïve she was not so long ago made her cringe. She knew she wasn't ever going to go back to that mindset again. "There's another subject as well, Ruby. She really needs to be taken out of there. They almost killed her earlier this week. They put her through torture because she doesn't have anyone looking for her. They're more careful with Emma and Regina, but with Ruby…"

Belle found herself trembling again at the thought of how broken Ruby really was. "She's been their possession to poke at and electrocute and cut for seven years and I'm not going to let her go through that any longer." The tremors were so bad that her teeth were starting to chatter. She curled into herself and looked down at the ground.

Putting a hand over Belle's shoulder, Aurora took it upon herself to speak as well. "I have some abilities as well, astral projection for one thing, but I'm also learning some things I can do that's tied to it. I've used it to look at the facility and talk to Emma and Regina and they're scared and miserable. Knowing how they feel and feeling how they feel, I can't leave them alone to continue to live like that."

"And you?" Neal said, "Mulan?"

Still stiff and uncomfortable, Mulan kept her arms crossed over her chest. "I couldn't keep letting them treat the subjects like trash. I thought that working and training to be a guard and maybe some day a cop meant I'd get to protect people. As a guard in that place, all I've been doing is watching abuse and letting it happen." She shrugged. "I can't keep doing that."

"Okay." Neal nodded. "Okay. Emma has helped Killian and I out of a lot of tough spots and she helped us earn big when she was on our team. She took the fall for us and we can't leave her when she needs us. Especially not when we're capable of helping out."

Killian came over to sit next to Neal. "It took a bit of thinking and we're sorry to be late to the party, ladies." He smiled at them, "But we're in now. What's your plan?"

The trembling had eased and Belle was able to straighten up and answer. "We think Aurora may be able to get the guards and the rest of the staff to fall asleep. Most likely with Regina's help."

Belle tried to keep their plan concise and clear as she explained it to Neal and Killian. "The problem is that Regina is being heavily sedated, and there may also be blockers being developed for her abilities. Mulan will work on deactivating the blockers but the sedatives is another bit we still have to address because she won't be of much help if she's still groggy."

Neal and Killian both listened without interrupting. Belle wasn't sure why she found it so surprising that Killian wasn't interrupting.

"Aurora will be able to link with Emma and they should be able to telepathically link to us all so I think we'll be able to maintain communication with everyone on the team. I mean everyone within the area of the facility anyway. A wider radius might be too taxing for Emma and Aurora." Belle had to stop herself from going into too much detail about the mechanics of Emma and Aurora's abilities. "Once Regina is able and the guards and staff are asleep, Mulan will inform us of the update and will be able to move in and get her, Emma and another subject out of their quarters. I'll be using a key card from one of the guards to get to the lower levels were Ruby is being held."

"Okay, so you've covered how to get in and more or less how to get out. That still leaves the cameras, right? I'm assuming the boss has the cameras hooked up to his phone and I'm assuming if he doesn't sleep in that damn hellhole he loves so much, then his eyes are always on the footage."

The sudden aggression from Neal about _"the boss_ " took Belle by surprise, but she took it in stride. "Yes, Mulan said the cameras are going to be a problem."

"We can't cover up every camera and there are only a few blindspots." Mulan added.

"Leave the cameras to me." Neal said. "I can take them down. When they go down, the boss will probably think it's a connection issue. He's going to call the phone and try to figure out what's going on. So I'm going to cut the phone lines as well. Now he's either going to call someone to go and check, but more likely he's going to go over there himself to find out what's going on. But again this is assuming he doesn't sleep there."

"He does sometimes." Mulan shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "A lot of times. But he does go home every so often."

"I figured." Neal was showing an uncanny understanding of how Dr. Gold thought and behaved. It was probably part of their line of work- profiling people with very limited information. "So we're going to have to give him a reason to be at home or at least not in the facility on this particular night. Killian and I should be able to call in a buddy to stage a break in and set off the guy's alarm system. This could be the afternoon of the breakout."

Belle wasn't sure if she was impressed or alarmed by how experienced… even _professional_ Neal was about this.

"The other option is of course to just let him be at the facility that night and have him fall asleep together with everyone else." Killian said. "That's simpler and uses less resources."

Right.

That _was_ simpler.

"This is of course all running with the assumption that Regina and I can really get everyone to fall asleep." Aurora said. "I haven't had the chance to try it yet."

"Well you're going to have to get practicing then, love." Killian said, "Because a lot is going to be riding on that. Otherwise we're going to have find another way to get past all the staff and guards."

"You can do it, Aurora." Mulan's posture was still tense, but as she looked over at Aurora, there was a gentler tone to her words. "I believe in you."

Then, as if shrugging off that moment of softness, Mulan turned her gaze to Neal. "But as a back up plan, I'll figure something out. We have more than enough sedatives there to knock out all the staff, with room to spare."

"Drug the people who drug their prisoners." Killian smirked. "I like it."

"Wait," Belle spoke up before they could get too far into their walkthrough. "Neal, would you be capable of getting into the system and publishing all their research?"

Neal's eyes widened at the question before he clenched his jaw and looked to the side. He mulled over the idea before looking at them. "In theory, yes. But why? Are we hoping to expose them as well?"

"Yes." Belle said, "We figure that having their database published would give them a harder time of covering everything up. It'll also make it divide their resources and give us more time to get away."

A smile spread over Killian's face as he nodded his head. "Makes sense, yeah."

"Okay. I'll work on that during the breakout itself." There was reluctance in Neal's tone and discomfort in his posture, but he didn't object. "So we've just about covered getting in, avoiding the staff and getting to the prisoners. Is there a way to discreetly contact them to tell them to be ready?"

"Yeah, we've got that covered." Belle answered.

Neal nodded. "Perfect. Killian and I can work on getting two cars."

But Belle already had a car, wasn't that enough? She wasn't too keen on parting with her car. Although admittedly, she wasn't too keen on potentially having an intense car chase with it either. "Why do we need two cars?"

The smile on Killian's face was almost condescending, like he was talking to children. "Even with the cameras down, there's going to be a chance that the car we get away in will be seen. So one car is seen going out. Another car will be what takes the team to the hideout or at least the meeting point."

"Can we use vans though?" Aurora asked. "We're getting at least three subjects out, possibly nine even. And there's still the three of us and the two of you. We either need more vehicles or bigger ones. Or both."

"Nine?" Neal blinked a few times. "Really? I thought we were just gunning for Emma and the two others you mentioned?"

"There are a few others we feel obligated to help." Mulan said, "And Emma herself said she would rather all of the subjects are released but that's not quite feasible for now."

Killian and Neal exchanged looks.

"I have my car." Belle said, trying to be helpful. "Not including myself as the driver, I can hold four passengers, five or six for a tight squeeze."

"Nah, I think I can figure something out." Killian said, "Assuming we succeed in getting out the nine that you want, there's still the five of us. I can get us maybe two pickups that can hold maybe five or six people each. Those can be the ones stationed at the facility. I'll try to get a truck or a trailer that can hold all fourteen of us."

"Do we have a hideout?" Neal asked, "Because once the three of you don't show up to work after the breakout, your houses will probably be the first places they'll look. It can't be anyplace under your names."

This was sounding more and more like they were going to have to go into hiding and Belle knew that among the three of them, nobody was prepared for that just yet. "We haven't figured out a hideout yet." Belle admitted. And she didn't particularly feel ready to think about hiding. Papa still had no idea of any of what was going on.

"Okay. We'll cover that too." Neal's tone wasn't as judgmental as he took in their lack of preparation. "Will all of the subjects be staying at the hideout or will any be breaking off on their own before we reach our destination?"

Mulan shrugged, "Four of them -the Dunbroch family- they might prefer to handle themselves and meet with Mr. Dunbroch. Maybe we can drop them off somewhere with fresh clothes so they're not conspicuously in hospital gowns?

Killian raised an eyebrow. "So we're going to have to get clothes too?"

"I can cover that." Aurora volunteered. "Mulan, if you can just give me an estimate of their sizes, I can handle getting some clothes for them. I can get something for Elsa as well. Heck, I could work on preparing clothes for all the subjects if ever."

"Okay, good." Killian seemed relieved. "Maybe we could meet this weekend to finalize things? And we'll also let you know if the three vehicles and the hideout are ready by then."

"I have work this weekend but I could join the meeting after my shift." Mulan had still not moved to sit down at all or even relaxed the tense set to her shoulders.

"I should be able to keep my place free for a meeting this weekend, yeah." Aurora said.

Belle felt pumped from the excitement of planning everything out, but also terrified of how things could all go wrong and it would only serve to make the lives of the subjects all that much worse. "I can come over here. Will you guys be able to make the trip here?"

"Yeah, no problem, love." Killian winked again and it irked Belle.

"Okay then." Neal looked just about as uncomfortable as Belle felt. At least he didn't come off as slimy as Killian did. "We'll see each other this Saturday. We work on the cars and the hideout. You work on the clothes and spreading the word. And finalizing how to keep the staff out of the way."

"Got it." Belle said.

"Before we get in too deep, I hope you three know what you're getting in to." Neal looked at them and there was what Belle thought was a knowing look in his eye. "Once we do this, there's no turning back."

"Just handle your end and we'll handle ours." Mulan spoke up again.

"Fair enough." Neal said. "Have a good night."

They were left staring at a blank television screen like Neal had never been there.

But he and Killian had been right there, and Belle felt a heaviness in the air as the three of them all thought about what would most likely change as a result of the major risk they were all going to be taking.

* * *

Mother had been at it again, talking about plans to leave the country and complaining about how attached her daughter was to her friends. It had been difficult to get permission to go out this Saturday, after work at the diner. There was a lot of begging and negotiating.

"Daydreamer, you're doing it again." Peter's hand squeezed hers as he called her attention. There was no impatience or annoyance in his tone, which she was grateful for.

Smiling and trying to get herself back into the present, she nodded to Peter next to her then to… Dorothy and Merida across her. "Sorry. Just got a lot on my mind."

"Aye, seems like you were in another world just then." Merida was smiling but it was hard to tell if she was genuinely amused or trying to politely mask frustration.

"Sorry." She shifted in her seat and leaned into Peter, "You were going to tell us why you transferred?"

"Tis a bit of a long story, but basically mum has an…" Merida toyed with her curls, seeming to think of the right word to use, "… illness. We left home to come here for treatment for it."

Dorothy wrapped an arm around Merida and stroked her shoulder. "They only get to see their mom on weekends since she's checked in for the treatment."

Was it possible that Mother was sick and wanted to get treatment outside of the country, just like Merida's mother was doing? Somehow that was doubtful though. It seemed more likely that Mother just wanted to go somewhere different. She was always complaining about everything.

Either way, she couldn't imagine leaving all she knew, just like that. "Do you miss your friends? Back in Scotland?"

Merida toyed with her hair again. "Sometimes, I do. But it's for the best and I gotta see it that way, don't I?"

"I suppose you do." She nodded, tried to smile. "I'll just head to the bathroom for a bit." Untangling herself from Peter, she headed to the restrooms.

It was clean here, which she appreciated. And it gave her time to look herself in the eye and tell herself to get a grip. This whole thing was supposed to be so they could get to know the girl that Dorothy was starting to date. This wasn't the time or the place for her to be distracted or moody or make a scene.

"Wolfie, you okay?" Dorothy came to join her and they both looked at their reflections.

"I don't know." She admitted.

"This isn't about Merida, is it?" Dorothy asked, worry dripping into her voice. "Because I'd really love it if you guys could get along with her. She's… she's really great."

And she was.

But there was still that small stupid part that wanted Dorothy for herself.

Which was wrong and greedy because Peter was already part of the picture.

"We can make it work, you know." Dorothy put a hand over hers. "I was scared too, when you first started dating Peter. I thought things would get weird between us."

"It did for a little bit though, didn't it? You gave Peter a pretty tough time."

Dorothy laughed, "Yeah, I guess I did. But things did change. And they changed for the better. We all got a heck of a lot closer to each other, didn't we? Maybe the same could happen with Merida. Maybe we'd just be a great team, the four of us." That was a lovely thought, but she wasn't quite sure if she was ready to think welcome it.

"Please," Dorothy said, "Give her a chance."

Nodding and smiling, she said, "Yeah. I will. I am. I think it's nice that she can makes you smile a lot more lately." They looked down at their matching bracelets, with "Wolfie" and "Kansas" still clearly visible. "She's going to need a nickname, too."

A smile spread over Dorothy's face. "Yeah, when we've gotten settled into our thing with her, we can give her one too!" The smile turned into a smirk and a raised eyebrow, "But we are not calling her Ginger or anything like that, okay? I'm pretty sure she's going to stab us all if we do."

"Fair enough." They could think of something together when the time was right. Maybe Scotland if they were going to poke at her homeland like they did with Dorothy and her hometown. Or maybe Pony since she seemed almost as fascinated by horses as she was with wolves.

"Something else is bothering you."

Of course Dorothy could tell. They've been friends long enough to know when one had a problem.

But maybe Dorothy would be able to provide some advice or at least some comfort. She thought over how to express herself before finally speaking, "Mother's been talking more about leaving. And talking more about how I'm too attached to you and Peter."

"Oh." Dorothy's brow furrowed. She wasn't too fond of Mother and often had trouble hiding that when they talked about her. "More than usual?"

"Yeah."

"No matter how much she talks about it, there's not much she can actually _do_." Dorothy squeezed her hand. "Leaving town is a huge hassle. Leaving the country is an even _bigger_ hassle. There's a ton of paperwork I'm pretty sure she still has to figure out so it's not going to happen instantly."

"Right." She nodded. "That's true."

"She's not taking you away from us that easily, okay?"

"Okay."

Dorothy reached over and pulled her in for a hug. "Come here,"

It was nice, being in Dorothy's arms. She was warm and soft and soothing. They were here for each other and they'd helped each other through bullies and boys (and girls) and helped each other with homework and binged movies and shows together. The world wasn't going to have an easy time separating them.

"Wolfie," Dorothy's voice was muffled into her shoulder. "Can you do me a favor and like… stop growing?"

She pulled away to look at Dorothy with a raised eyebrow. "What?"

"You're too damn tall!" Dorothy's tone was joking as she pretended to be annoyed. "I mean come on, when we were kids, _I_ was taller than you!"

That got a laugh out of her and she nudged Dorothy, "Maybe you should start working harder on growing then."

Dorothy huffed, "Whatever. Let's get back to our humans. Peter is enjoying the interrogation way too much since I put him through the same damn thing when you two became a thing."

"Yeah, let's get moving before he scares her all the way back home."

* * *

As she waited in the small room, Belle thought over the conversation with Mulan and Aurora last night. They kind of avoided the topic of how things would change their lives. None of them were really ready to dwell on that. Belle knew Mulan didn't want to drag her twin brother into the mess but also didn't want to just disappear on him without a trace and without a word. Aurora wasn't willing to part with her comfortable life and wasn't willing to lose contact with her grandmothers. She also would rather not get her parents involved. Belle also had a feeling that Aurora didn't want to be part of a scandal that could affect the family and the business.

And Belle herself? She could relate to Mulan most. Papa didn't deserve to get involved in this mess, but he also didn't deserve to suddenly lose contact with his daughter, the only family he had left after his wife's passing.

What they did talk about instead was warning the subjects and getting them ready for an escape. Aurora was in charge of handling that with Emma's help. A debate had erupted from that on whether or not Ruby should be informed. Mulan had expressed doubt about telling Ruby beforehand. With all the brainwashing and abuse that Ruby was being put through, she might panic and somehow try to warn Dr. Gold.

While Belle preferred to get Ruby mentally and emotionally prepared for an escape, there was merit to Mulan's concerns. If Ruby recoiled so much at simply being called by her real name, then the concept of being liberated from the facility may overwhelm her.

They could only hope that she would cooperate when the time finally came to get her out.

And Belle hoped Ruby would be able to see what they were doing for her.

On top of all that, they also still had to see if Aurora would be capable of making people fall asleep. The practice runs she had with Belle and Mulan had only made them groggy but not quite enough to doze off yet. And the excess energy Aurora gained from that made her annoyingly hyperactive.

The door swung open, interrupting her thoughts. Mulan and another guard maneuvered Ruby to the chair across Belle.

"Unclasped cuffs like last time. And no chains either." Dr. Gold's order came through the speakers.

"Yes, sir." Mulan worked on the cuffs behind Ruby's back while the other guard undid the chains. Once her hands were free and the chains were removed, Ruby looked just as nervous and tense as ever. Her eyes darted around the room like she was looking for a place to hide if she lost control.

As the guards left the room, Belle had to remind herself once more not to use Ruby's name. "204, it's okay."

Ruby turned her tired eyes to Belle and it was surprising to see that they were bloodshot and puffy. Almost like she'd been crying. A lot.

"Look, we're not going to do anything intense today." Belle spoke softly, slowly and calmly. "You're still recovering from that close call and we just want to help you feel better, okay?"

Slumping into her chair, Ruby looked down at her hands. They were under the table, so Belle couldn't see them, but she hoped they weren't clenched and bleeding again. The fact that Ruby had developed the habit as a coping method was tragic and Belle hoped that once they were all out of here, they could work on helping Ruby find better ways to cope with stress.

"I brought you lunch again." With Dr. Gold's permission of course. Belle pulled two burgers out of a paperbag and pushed one over to Ruby's side of the table. "I got you one with bacon and cheese."

There was suspicion in Ruby's eyes and she looked around a few times before bringing one of her hands up and reaching for the wrapped up burger. Before her hand could touch it, she stopped and looked at Belle, almost asking for permission.

"Go ahead," Belle had to stop herself from saying Ruby's name, had to remind herself this was not yet a safe place to use it. "Nothing bad is going to happen, I promise."

As she said that, she wished she could somehow convey how much she meant that promise. How much she wanted to keep bad things from happening to Ruby because she'd already been living seven years of bad things and the poor, broken girl could really use a break.

Ruby brought the burger over to herself while Belle started unwrapping her own.

Just like with the pizza, Ruby looked to Belle for permission again.

"Go ahead," Belle didn't mind the patience that was going to be needed to help Ruby feel comfortable with acting on her own again, but it still hurt just seeing how fearful she was and how she kept needing permission to do anything. "You deserve it."

At that Ruby shook her head.

"Please," Belle couldn't read Ruby's mind without Emma's abilities, but it wasn't hard to tell that Ruby was probably now thinking long and hard about how she deserved the treatment she got. "Just eat, at least to regain your strength and recover after what happened."

Ruby looked down at the burger, unwrapped but still pretty much untouched.

"Please?"

Finally, Ruby nodded and tore into the burger, taking big bites and leaving a mess of cheese all over her face and hands.

That was when Belle noticed something new. Wrapped around one of Ruby's thin and scarred arms was a leather bracelet. It was patchy and worn out, all tattered at the sides, with a rusty metal name plate on one side.

"That bracelet, that wasn't there before."

Ruby tensed up, covering the bracelet with her other hand.

"I won't take it away, I promise." Belle moved her chair closer to the table. "May I see?"

Visibly swallowing the food in her mouth, Ruby hesitated, then seemed to glance at the camera before returning her attention to Belle. An uneasy sigh could just barely be heard coming from Ruby's lips before she reached her hand over to show the bracelet.

The nameplate was rusty and darkened, but with some effort, Belle was able to make out the word "Wolfie."

"Is that from someone here?" Belle asked.

Ruby shook her head.

"Someone from your past?"

The question was making Ruby uncomfortable. She licked her lips then glanced at the camera again.

"It's okay, we don't have to talk about it." Belle leaned back in her seat and returned her attention to the burger. "You can continue eating."

Though there was still tension written all over Ruby, she relaxed by a small but noticeable fraction as she continued to eat her burger in big, ravenous bites.

"If you remember Happy Meals," Belle put her burger down and wiped her hands on a napkin, "This came with a toy I figured I'd give you." She reached into her bag and pulled out a little stuffed lion with bready green eyes and a fluffy red mane. It had been tempting to get the husky that looked like a wolf but Belle had doubts about how Ruby might feel about it.

Confusion was written all over Ruby's face, from the tilt of her head to the lift of her brow to the slight parting of her chapped lips.

"Here," Belle placed the toy in front of Ruby. "Dr. Gold and I kind of talked about it and he said I could give it to you since your birthday was last Sunday."

It had taken some discussion and Dr. Gold was reluctant but eventually gave in. Belle somehow managed to tie it in with how they were trying to work on Ruby's interpersonal skills and receiving a gift and how she would react to it would be interesting.

Those were bullshit excuses and Dr. Gold probably knew that as well as Belle did, but at least he relented.

"Really, you can have it."

Ruby looked down at the toy as she placed her burger on the table and wiped her hands on her gown before Belle could think about offering tissue. There was another glance at Belle, again asking for permission.

"It's yours."

After looking around and glancing at the camera one more time, Ruby picked up the stuffed lion and brought it close to her face. She looked like she was sniffing it, then she brought it to her face and rubbed her cheek against it. Her eyes closed for a moment as she relished the softness of the toy and the texture of the lion's little mane.

A smile was taking form on Ruby's face now as she looked at Belle and put the toy down on the table.

"You're welcome." Belle smiled back.

The smile spread wider and it struck Belle how much younger Ruby looked and how she deserved to be happy and full of life and love instead of trapped here in this prison full of horror and pain and sadness.

Ruby brought her attention back to the rest of the burger and scarfed down the last of it.

Remembering to finish up with her own, Belle continued eating it while thinking of other things to say. If only she could use Ruby's name and tell her about what they were planning to do, tell her that one day she wouldn't have to keep asking for permission or that one day she wouldn't have to always be wearing cuffs and a collar. If only she could tell Ruby that she mattered. That she was human and not the monster that she was so sure that she was.

The past was a tragedy and Belle could only imagine the guilt that Ruby carried.

But the answer wasn't years of torture and humiliation. There had to be something else. It was hard to figure out what that something else was. But Belle hoped there could be another solution. What Ruby did wasn't something that could be swept under the rug, but putting her through this wasn't right either.

"Do you like sweets?" Belle asked, trying to swallow back the train of thought.

Ruby looked up from playing with the lion's mane. She looked around again before nodding.

"How 'bout we have some dessert?" She had grabbed the M&M's from the nearest convenience store, hoping to comfort eat before driving home later but why not share it now? It was conveniently in the pocket of her labcoat and Dr. Gold hopefully wouldn't mind too much. "Let's share."

It was interesting to note that Ruby was squeezing the lion toy. Not hard, but enough to be noticeable, and Belle thought that could count as a small victory.

"Here." She brought out the pack and tore it open wide enough so they could both get from it. Belle helped herself and gestured for Ruby to do the same. "Go ahead. I have a feeling you haven't had much chocolate in a while."

With one hand still squeezing the lion, Ruby reached her other hand over to take a piece.

"Come on, 204," Belle just barely managed to avoid using Ruby's name. "Take like a whole handful. Open your palm, please."

Ruby turned her hand over and opened her palm.

Again, Belle tried not to wince at the scars. The skin was so twisted and mangled, it wasn't hard to imagine how often and how intensely Ruby used that coping method.

"Here." Hopefully she hadn't spent too much time staring at Ruby's hand. Belle focused on taking the bag of M&M's and pouring a good chunk of the pack into Ruby's palm. "Enjoy."

The expression on Ruby's face was still one of disbelief as she brought the chocolate over to herself.

And sniffed it.

"I know some people like to eat piece by piece." Belle said. "I know others who like to just _drink_ it all. Which one are you?"

A sheepish smile came over Ruby's face just then, and she lifted her hand up to her mouth and showed that she was the type who _drank_ her M &M's.

Belle found herself smiling and suppressing a laugh. "Okay, noted. Me, I'm kind of the type to eat just several pieces at a time."

Ruby licked her lips and moved her hand close to the M&M's, looking at Belle and silently asking for more.

"Go ahead, have the rest." Belle moved the pack closer to Ruby. "I can always buy more."

The wide eyes and open mouth on Ruby's face basically looked like _What? Really?_

"Really."

The excitement Ruby had was contagious and Belle found herself grinning ear to ear. Ruby took the pack and was definitely the type to drink her M&M's.

And Belle knew that she was going to do everything she could to give this person all the happiness and warmth she hadn't had in years. It was going to take patience and a whole lot of it, to work on giving Ruby back to herself. But if there was still something in her that could smile and drink her chocolate candy the way she was now, then maybe, just maybe, it was more than just possible that Ruby could heal from this.

They just had to get her out of here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this my longest chapter yet? I don't even know how that happened. WHEW.
> 
> Also gosh the stuffed lion happy meal toy. I NEED IT.
> 
> Not sure when I can update since I've got a somewhat busy weekend, and I also recently started a mentorship thing that should help me get on track with what i'm trying to do with my comic. So we'll see how things go. See y'all again soon!


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I'd just save this for Monday but I accidentally finished it early? so here you go. NEXT chapter should be out on Monday or after because I need to think about it and the outline for the next arc is still a bit messy.

Belle was nice. Too nice. It was strange and foreign and all wrong. The subject wasn't supposed to be given chocolate or good food or even plush animals. And not kind words and conversation either. How was that supposed to be of any help to anyone? Nice conversation wasn't going to cure the subject or cure sick people.

But it felt… good.

It felt good to be offered things. It felt good to be asked if she wanted things. It felt good to talk about chocolate and nothing in particular.

From her spot under the bed, the subject had the lion plush in her hand, squeezing it slightly and pressing it against her face. The mane tickled her cheeks, but she liked the feel of it and the feel of the lion itself. It was just so soft and felt so soothing against her skin.

There was a whole other world out there and she was missing out on it.

No, she wasn't missing out on it.

The world was being protected from a monster. The world was safer without monsters like herself and like Granny.

Her other arm was under her chin, and she could see the bracelet at the corner of her eye. It smelled old, with the rust overpowering any other scent she might have picked up.

Although after seven years, it was doubtful that she'd get to scent Peter or Dorothy at all. Their scents would have faded from this bracelet just like they had just about faded from her memory.

She knew Peter smelled like hair gel and cologne, but she couldn't concretely recall the exact scents anymore. Dorothy usually smelled like her dog and her shampoo.

They were gone though. They were gone and they weren't coming back and it was all because she was a monster. None of this ever would have happened if she had just been good and did what she was told. Maybe Mother would have successfully found a way to relocate the family to somewhere safe from their monstrosity. Maybe authorities would have taken them away either way.

Trying hard to think about what Granny said about cookies, the subject couldn't figure out how she was supposed to make sense of this. What was she looking at?

She was looking at the facts, right? The subject was a monster and the subject took away the lives of Peter, Dorothy, Mr. Spencer and who knew how many other students. And if she hadn't killed them, she may have even infected them. If not then she had injured them or traumatized them.

Granny was taken away and news spread that the serial killer had been caught. Mother had made offhanded comments about Granny not being careful. Granny had been a subject here and she died as they were trying to cure her. Granny was a monster just like the subject.

Mother… always talked about being careful and keeping distant from others. She brought home men sometimes and they weren't always seen leaving the house. Maybe they just snuck out.

Dr. Gold and the scientists always talked about trying to cure her and trying to understand her abilities.

Mulan and Belle and Emma and even Regina and Aurora, they kept telling the subject that she deserved better and that they saw her as human.

They were wrong, right? They had to be.

Maybe the subject was looking at one side of the cookie while Belle and Mulan and the others were looking at the other side.

But surely, they were looking at the wrong side and the subject was looking at the right side. They couldn't both be right because that didn't make sense. There was no way that could make sense and there was no way that they could be right because the subject knew what was right. What was right was that she was a killer and a monster and she deserved her punishment. The fact that some good was even coming out of her punishment meant that she was where she needed to be.

She was where she was meant to be.

Realizing that she had started squeezing the lion very hard, the subject loosened her grip and nuzzled the thing. If only sleep would come. She could use the escape.

* * *

It was almost time. They would be taking action tomorrow night.

To be ready and to make sure everything was clear, they went over the plan one more time. Emma and Aurora would setup the communication line between them, using each other to widen Emma's range. Killian would be out of range, waiting down on the side of the road with the truck. Aurora and Neal would be manning the pickups. How Killian and Neal managed to acquire three vehicles was beyond Belle and she figured she was better off not quite knowing. She liked to assume they were from cousins or friends of friends and they just played videogames together to bond and not… other things.

Still, Aurora driving the pickup was debatable. Belle wanted to insist on driving until they left it up to be an issue of who was less drained after the whole operation. Aurora was moderately offended by Belle's doubt.

Driving issue aside, Aurora was starting to get a better grasp of her abilities and she had successfully gotten some of them to fall asleep by pulling their consciousness into a dream she constructed. It took a great deal of concentration for her to maintain the dream and maintain peoples' consciousness in the dream, especially when they tried fighting to wake up.

So they were going to have to prioritize getting the guards and Dr. Gold to fall asleep. Mulan overheard him telling Dr. Whale about staying the weekend since he wanted to look more into the progress of their studies on Ruby and Merida.

Aurora would start with getting Gold to sleep. That would give Neal the chance to kill the cameras, radios and phones. It was going to take a great deal of energy considering he didn't normally do things at this scale, but he said he would also work on obtaining and uploading the database. He had a laptop ready to help him do that since he didn't trust his brain to be able to hold everything.

With the cameras and communication down, Mulan would be able to get a hold of a remote to deactivate Regina's blocker. They weren't keeping her as heavily sedated anymore, but she may still be groggy. If she couldn't be of help with getting the whole facility to fall asleep, then Aurora was going to prioritize Gold, Gaston, Walter and select guards. Ideally all the guards but they weren't sure how well Aurora could handle all of that.

The guards at the entrance would have to be put into sleep, and from there Belle could be driven in by Neal. After some discussion, they refined their plan to have Belle's own keycard gain some adjustments thanks to Neal. That way they wouldn't be dependent on Mulan getting to steal an extra keycard.

While Belle would be working her way down to the lower floors where Ruby was being kept, Mulan would be disabling Regina and Elsa's blockers, then getting Emma, Regina and Elsa to the entrance and into Neal's car. There was another debate that went up over who should sit where. They eventually decided on the Dunbroch family being on the other pickup and separate from Ruby. Just in case a threat of a fight may break out.

The details of Ruby's classroom incident were still vague but Merida may have been there.

Hopefully the thrill of the escape would be enough to keep some peace once they were all inside the truck. Otherwise it would be a very tense and very _dangerous_ ride if a werewolf and a… were _bear_ broke into a fight.

If any assistants happened upon them, they were to inform Aurora and she would get them to sleep.

There were probably loopholes they weren't seeing and given that Aurora may not be able to knock everything out, there was a major threat of discovery. At the very least, it would be difficult to call for backup or sound the alarm as long as Neal was keeping everything down.

As the night wore on and the planning wrapped up, Aurora and Mulan retreated into Aurora's room. Belle assumed they were going to talk some more since they probably both still had misgivings about how this would change their lives. Killian settled into the couch and started to snore already. Belle was going to head home soon. Neal was still sitting at the table.

"What's up?" Belle asked as she put her notes back into her bag.

"Just feels weird." Neal mumbled into his hands as his eyes looked beyond the kitchen counter. "Going back."

"Going back?" Belle frowned, taken aback by this subtle admission of Neal's history. "You've been to Baelfire before?"

Letting out a long sigh, Neal blinked and looked over at Belle, "Yeah."

"As… a subject?" Was that why he knew so much about how Dr. Gold behaved? Was that why he was so reluctant at first to be part of the plan?

Neal shrugged, "Maybe I'll tell you another time. Only Emma knows because y'know, the whole mind reading thing. Killian doesn't really know either."

"Whenever you're ready then." Belle finished up with her bag and straightened up. "Will you be okay?"

After another deep sigh, Neal nodded. "Yeah." He sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as he was trying to convince Belle. "Gotta be." He nodded again. "Take care heading home."

"Thanks, I will." With a small wave to Neal, Belle let herself out and started her car. It grumbled to life and she carefully pulled out of the parking spot and headed home.

Once she got home, Belle opened the door and nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw someone sitting in the living room in the dark. Turning the light on was a relief, showing that it was just Papa. What he was doing waiting in the living room was another story.

Papa rubbed at his eyes and stretched. "Oh, you're home. Hi, Belle."

"Papa, I told you not to wait up for me." Belle hung her car keys on the hook by the door before walking over to him and flopping into the seat across him. "I said I'd be home late."

"I've been worried about you." He looked at her with tired eyes framed by deep and heavy wrinkles. "You've been so distant lately."

 _I have?_ was tempting to say, but Belle didn't feel like lying to him and either way didn't have the energy to make it believable tonight. It was hard enough spending her days acting like Dr. Gold was the sun she wanted to revolve around.

"I'm sorry," Belle clasped her hands on her lap and kept her gaze on her knees. She couldn't bear to look at his tired and worried eyes and know that she was going to make him more tired and more worried in the next few days. How could she tell him that tonight might be the last night they would see each other if something went wrong?

And what if it went right? There would be chaos. There would be debates on either side- for and against the subjects. The facility would be working doubletime to cover up what was going on and retrieving the subjects they'd lost. It would be too risky to stay nearby. Whether people turned out to be for or against the facility's methods, the escaped subjects would be discussed _everywhere_.

There was still the fact that Emma and Belle herself would want to go back for more subjects and just get everything out.

Though the water creatures would be… a bit of a problem.

"Is something wrong going on with work?" Papa asked, "You haven't been the same since that week you took night shifts. Is there still some methods you disagree with? Is that what's getting to you?"

She couldn't do this.

Belle shook her head and stood up. "I've just been very busy lately, Papa."

"Belle, wait." Papa caught her wrist and looked up at her. "Your friends from work… they're helping you, right?"

"What do you mean?"

"Something at work is bothering you… Spending time with your friends is helping you get through that, isn't it?"

That was as close to the truth as Belle was willing to let him get. "Yeah. We… talk about it among ourselves a lot."

"Okay." Papa let go. "Just remember you can still talk to me. Okay?"

As tempting as it was to just pour it all out to him and be a stupid teenager again breaking down over some stupid boy again, Belle couldn't. This wasn't a situation where he could be a parent and fix everything. This was bigger than a problem with some boy. This was bigger than any of them.

She was an adult now and she was making a major choice and she wasn't going to let him stop her or let him get involved.

Still, she understood his worry and his concern. Belle bent over and embraced him, as tight as she could, burying her face into his big shoulder. "Okay, Papa. Thanks." His wide hands stroked her hair like he used to when she was growing up. It felt good to be in his arms again, and it was tempting to just be in this little bubble forever.

But she had a job to do.

Belle pulled away, gave Papa a good night kiss, and headed to her room. Maybe she should have told him. Maybe he could have been able to help somehow.

Maybe.

* * *

The last thing she remembered was being terrified as Mr. Spencer yelled at her and Dorothy crowded over her. The last thing she remembered was the building headache and the powerful burst of emotions as everything in the classroom overwhelmed her.

So how was she here now? In some kind of hospital room with an IV hooked up to her hand? Cuffs of some sort were hurting her wrists and keeping them at her sides. Thick straps were across her shoulders, waist and legs.

A beeping machine startled her until she realized it was in tune with her heartbeat.

Where was she? Did she collapse? Was it a heartattack or something?

A memory flashed through her, of her hand pushing Dorothy away and it being so strong that she was sent straight into a bookshelf.

Was that real? Was Dorothy okay? What happened?

"Hello?" She called out craning her neck to look around and try to understand her surroundings. Other than machines with readings she couldn't understand as well as some strange charts and readings on the wall, the room was empty, with space for little more than her bed. "Anyone there?"

If this was a hospital shouldn't there be a button somewhere to call the nurse? Dorothy got sick one time and had one of those and it annoyed the nurses when they played with it.

Was Dorothy okay?

The door opened and a small man in a lab coat walked over. "I see you're awake, dearie."

"Are you a doctor?" She asked, "Is this a hospital? What happened? Is Dorothy okay?"

A part of her doubted the answer was a yes, but she had to know. She had to be sure. The image of Dorothy's body- limp and broken- flashed through her mind and she remembered how the bookshelf practically shattered at the impact. Had she really pushed Dorothy that hard?

"Dorothy Gale was found dead. The impact with the bookshelf broke her neck." The man put a hand on his chest and looked sad for a moment as he stood over her. "I'm sorry, dearie. Her aunt and uncle already started preparing for the funeral."

The words stabbed into her chest and she lay her head back down and swallowed, trying to still the tremors running through her body. She clenched her hands into fists and tried to gain some control of her body.

"My. Spencer?"

"Also dead." There was a brief pause. "I'm not sure you would want to know the details."

Another memory flashed through her and she remembered claws tearing into him, hands twisting his head around.

She remembered the screams and the panic and how she just wanted the screaming to stop.

"What happened?" Her voice came out soft and choked. "How did I get here?"

Vaguely, she recalled how a team of men in dark clothing and carrying heavy weaponry came into the room and she remembered pain hitting her ribs and exploding and burning her up before she blacked out.

"You made quit the ruckus in that classroom." The man answered. "Something like that doesn't normally happen in a place like Storybrooke High School. A small town doesn't get a mass killing without turning it into major news. At least three students and one teacher died. The rest were severely injured and are currently being closely monitored for signs of suspicious symptoms. Some students may not survive their injuries."

Her eyes were burning up and she swallowed a hard lump through her tight throat.

"It will be expensive, but we're going to cover up what happened." The man continued, "It's necessary because mass hysteria is the last thing anyone needs."

"Am I going to prison?" She was a murderer, she had to be locked up. Just like Granny. Apparently the apple didn't fall far from the tree.

The man shook his head. "While you were sedated, we had to have several meetings with representatives from several sectors before it was decided that you will be detained in this facility to further research your kind and better prepare us for a similar incident."

"Does my mom know?"

"Yes." The man put his hands in his pockets and sighed, "Unfortunately, she hasn't been willing to come in to talk to you. She's actually in the building now but only wants to discuss and negotiate with… us."

Mother was probably disappointed. Disappointed and angry.

She went through the trouble of picking her daughter up and teaching her how to avoid making the situation worse and instead her daughter turned around and staged multiple murders in a classroom full of witnesses.

Of course Mother wouldn't want to speak to her.

"Okay."

The man took a moment to go through her readings and the files on a table nearby.

She couldn't be alone with her thoughts and with her memories. Not right now. "Who are you?"

Turning around to face her, the man flashed a smile and a couple of gold teeth shown in the light. "I am Dr. Robert Gold, at your service, dearie. But we can stick with Dr. Gold."

"Will you be able to… fix me?"

Dr. Gold walked to her and stood by her bed. "We will do everything we can to cure you of your ailment." He put a hand over her clenched fist, and she realized she'd dug her nails in deep enough to draw blood. "We want to help you."

Memories of the screams kept bombarding her head. She remembered Merida coming at her for what she did to Dorothy, but she couldn't remember what happened after. She remembered Mr. Spencer yelling at her and moving towards the door but she couldn't remember what happened after.

She was having trouble sorting through all the scattered images, but the glimpses she got of blood and claws and screams and broken flesh made her recoil and she realized she didn't _want_ to remember.

"I don't…" She felt her voice crack and took a deep breath to steady herself. She was clenching her fists again. "I'm a _monster_."

"I wouldn't say _that_ , dearie." Dr. Gold let go of her hand and checked on the machines. "But you _did_ cause death and injury and we're now busy picking up the pieces."

All those people she killed… and for what? There was no reason. She just did it. Other murderers at least had a motive of some sort. Her? She was just a bloodthirsty monster who killed those who cared about her most.

"Where's my bracelet?" She didn't know why she wanted to know, but she felt like she needed something to hang on to. Something to remind her of when she wasn't a monster. "Can I have it back?"

"It was taken off of you when you were taken into custody." Dr. Gold said, "I'm sorry, dearie."

That was fine. This was fine. It was just a stupid bracelet anyway. It wasn't going to bring back Peter or Dorothy. It wasn't going to undo the way she brutally murdered them both.

Her eyes were warming up and she hated how she couldn't reach her face to cover it and wipe her eyes but she knew the security measure was needed. After what she did to so many people, after she gave in and became a monster, the last thing she needed was to have her hands free to do more harm all over again.

"We're here to help." Dr. Gold said, "We'll do everything we can."

Choking on her words, she could only nod her thanks.

* * *

 _I'm almost there_. Belle thought the words clearly as she made her way to the lower levels of the building using the modified keycard from Neal. They had agreed to focus on just the nine subjects and no more. That didn't keep her from feeling guilty as she passed several more doors along her way.

 _Perfect_. Emma's thoughts were riddled with excitement and anxiety as she felt escape coming so close to her fingertips. _Regina and Mulan are opening my door now. We'll get Elsa then start heading out. You really pulled through, Belle. I owe you._

 _We can talk about this once we're all out and safe_. Belle still had a nagging feeling that something was going to go wrong. A _nd we still have to come back for more subjects if this goes by well._

 _Yeah_. Emma hardened her resolve. _We have to come back for the others._

 _Let's just focus first on getting out?_ Regina was scared and still a little groggy. She wasn't in the right shape to help Aurora knock the remaining people out, but she was using her abilities to block some doors with furniture and machinery. It was an odd feeling, but while they were linked, Belle could almost see in her peripheral vision what the others were seeing and doing and feeling.

Mulan was escorting them up to the lobby now. The lights were still off and the guards at the entrance were still asleep. Neal was already waiting in the car, working on his laptop and switching out the external drives whenever one was full of data from the facility's system.

But for now, Belle had to focus on the matter at hand. She swiped her keycard to open the final door that led her to the hallway where the B7 rooms and enclosures were located.

And Mulan wasn't exaggerating.

It was very bright here. The contrast was stark and surprising compared to some of the hallways in the upper levels where the lights were out.

Reminding herself not to get caught up in her thoughts, Belle made her way down the rooms.

She passed B7001. B7002… B7003.

Quickening her pace, Belle worked her way down the long hall until she got to B7012… B7013… B7014…

And finally…

_B7015._

For a moment, Belle wondered if this was real. If maybe she was just in some sort of dream or if they were doing another run through in Aurora's kitchen. But as she pressed her keycard against the pad right under the label that read SUBJECT 204, Belle knew that this was real.

This was _it_.

The door opened and at first Belle just saw an empty room with bright lights and a bed with a thin mattress.

Until she noticed the chains hooked to the bed. Mulan said they would be there and gave the keys to unlock them. But where was Ruby? Belle's eyes followed where the chains trailed from the side of the bed, down to the floor, and then to… under the bed?

"Ruby?" Belle walked over to the bed and crouched down.

And there was Ruby, looking at her with wide green eyes and clutching the stuffed lion close to her face.

"Ruby, I'm getting you out of here now." Belle reached a hand under the bed for Ruby to grasp. "Let's go."

A gasp came from Ruby and she shook her head, shuffling to the other side until she was out from under the bed. Belle moved to look at her from over the bed. The girl was pressed against the corner of the room, fear written across her face.

"This isn't a test." She inched her way towards Ruby, slowly, step by careful step. "Please, may I remove your chains?"

Ruby shook her head and pressed herself deeper into the corner like she was trying to disappear into it. She turned to her side, tucked her chin into her chest, hunched her shoulders and kept her hands close to her face.

"Ruby, please." This wasn't the breakout that Belle had imagined. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. They should be running down the hallway now.

But she had to be patient.

She had already promised herself that she would always be patient with Ruby.

And dragging her through the door by force was not going to be the answer.

"We can take you somewhere safe." Belle crouched down in front of Ruby. "Where you won't be hurt or chained up like this anymore."

Ruby shook her head again, turning her body further away from Belle.

She was having trouble feeling the others now. It must be the range. She was in one of the lowest floors and Emma should be outside of the building by now.

 _Belle, get moving._ Emma's thoughts were distant and it took focus to hear it. _Regina, Elsa and I are out now. Mulan's going back for the Dunbrochs. Aurora's starting to get a nosebleed and she might not be able to keep everyone's consciousness much longer. Some of the guards are starting to wake up._

Shit.

Shit shit shit shit _FUCK_.

Belle felt panic rising up from the pit of her stomach to the base of her throat.

_Neal's getting tired out too but he managed to get a huge chunk of their system into his laptop and drives. He's not sure how long he can block the cameras and radios though. GET MOVING._

Could Emma reach Ruby? Maybe try to reach out to her and help her understand what they were doing?

_I can't. I can barely keep contact with Mulan and you. I'm starting to fade in and out now too. You have to get out NOW._

This wasn't going right.

Emma and everyone in that car had to get moving soon. Neal had to start driving. Ruby and the Dunbrochs were going to have to live with riding together. They just had to get out. They just all had to GET. OUT.

_If Neal starts driving, we'll lose contact with you. And he might not be able to keep the cameras and radios down if he's driving._

_Just have him ready to drive you out, just in case. And don't leave Aurora_. Belle thought the words and knew that whatever happened, she was not going to leave without Ruby.

"Ruby," Belle ignored the protests Emma was trying to send. At this distance, with this weak of a connection, it was a lot easier. "Ruby, please. I know you're scared of hurting more people if you get outside."

That caught Ruby's attention and she turned her head slightly to see Belle.

"But the way they're treating you here? That's not the answer." Belle moved closer and felt like her heart was going to explode out of her chest. She was terrified of how this could all come crashing down all around them. "I know how much you fight to control it. I know how much you fear yourself."

Ruby nodded.

"That's the difference, isn't it?" Belle moved closer until her knees were almost touching Ruby's thighs. "A monster wouldn't care. A monster would just keep doing what it's doing."

With her head still leaning against the wall and her body pressed against the corner and her hands clenched so tight they were starting to bleed again, Ruby looked at Belle and for a moment, she thought that maybe she had gotten through.

But Ruby shook her head.

"Ruby," Belle felt her voice cracking, "Please… I'm not going to leave without you."

Ruby shook her head.

"Ruby…"

" _2...0...4..._ " The voice had come out rough, and if she hadn't watched it with her own eyes, Belle wouldn't have believed that Ruby herself had spoken. But she had, and her words were daggers stabbing into Belle's chest. "…s-stays."

"You're _still_ Ruby." As much as it was wrong to touch Ruby when she clearly didn't want anything to do with Belle, they were losing time and this was becoming very desperate and terrifying. Belle reached over and took Ruby's hands.

Surprisingly, Ruby didn't fight back at all as Belle put their hands between them. She ran her thumb over the scars, ignoring the blood that was now touching her own skin. "I know you do this when you're scared. I know you do this to keep yourself from losing control."

As Belle continued to stroke Ruby's hands, they relaxed and opened further, revealing more of the marred skin. "I know how hard you fight to keep the wolf under control. That counts for something. That more than counts for something. It makes all the difference in the _world_."

The look on Ruby's face was conflicted as she bit her lip and furrowed her brow. She looked so scared and torn and Belle wished she could take all of that away.

"And this?" Belle moved one of her hands to touch the bracelet. "I know someone important gave this to you. I don't know what happened, but I know that they cared about you and they wouldn't want you going through this hell."

Ruby's face contorted with the effort and her jaw tensed up. "I…" She swallowed visibly. "K-Killed…" She licked her lips, bracing herself for that last word. "Them."

"What you did wasn't okay. You and I both know that." Belle continued to stroke Ruby's hands, felt them start to tense up and immediately clasped them so if she wanted to clench her hands, she would have to clench them over Belle's. "But you've spent the past seven years punishing yourself for it and being punished for it. I think you've learned from it. I think you deserve a second chance. You try so hard to keep it from happening and that counts for _something_."

The conflicted look on Ruby's face showed that she was at least starting to see Belle's points. Then her eyes widened and she looked at something behind Belle.

Electric pain burned into Belle's shoulder and ran up and down her limbs.

* * *

It had taken a lot of convincing and talking on the part of the scientists, but they had managed to get Mother to come in and see her daughter. And there Mother now stood, stiff as a statue, glaring at the daughter who broke all the rules and changed _everything_.

"Mother, I'm sorry I disobeyed you." She was still cuffed and strapped to the bed and the burning in her wrists was a throbbing pain she was actually starting to get used to. "If I just listened to you then…"

"Then you wouldn't be where you are now." Mother's voice was cold and hard. "Do you have any idea what you've done? You nearly exposed us all!"

The machines gave away how fast her heart was beating and she hated it, but she still tried to sit up and reach out to Mother even if the straps and cuffs wouldn't allow it. "I'm sorry!"

"I refuse to accept any apology from you." Mother's jaw was tense and the muscles stuck out noticeably. "They want me gone as well."

"Mother, please! I'm sorr-"

" _Shut up!_ " The snap cut her off and she clamped down. "The deal made with your grandmother no longer stands. There's a new arrangement. I can go home and finally leave this place. They'll run tests on you and figure out what's wrong with you, because after what you did, there is _definitely_ something wrong with you."

Her eyes were warming up and she wished she knew how to express how horrible she felt and how this was the last thing she wanted.

"At this point, I couldn't care less if their experiments are to cure you or poke and prod you until you're useless."

The thought of being cut into and dissected like a frog was terrifying and she felt her stomach twist.

"As far as I'm concerned, you are no longer my family."

Pain cut through her chest at those words and she felt her body starting to tremble. She wished she could get out of this bed and just beg Mother for forgiveness. Beg her to fix this like she almost fixed the incident with Peter. Beg her to be the Mother she was supposed to be and make everything bad go away.

Mother turned and started to walk towards the door.

"Mother, please!" The cuffs clanged as she tried to reach for her Mother and tried one more time to find some comfort.

For a moment, Mother stopped and it was almost like she was going to turn around and come back.

Instead, she looked over her shoulder and her cold words were knives hitting deep and hard and sharp. "The newspapers they started giving out say that the girl who killed her classmates also killed herself. That's close to the truth." She continued her walk to the door. "You are no longer my family, no longer a Lucas and no longer a part of my life."

The door slammed shut and she was left alone with her thoughts of a future she could have never imagined. As she struggled to steady her breathing and calm her rapidly pounding heart, she noticed a folder on her bedside.

A label on the front read " _SUBJECT 204_ ".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like some of you saw this coming even if I only talked to my bud Wolfie about what I wanted to do with the escape attempt. Also hurray for using the "taze them and fade to black" trope because this fic is partially the result of binging Stranger Things over a long weekend with the fam.
> 
> So what happens now? Did Neal get to drive the girls away in time? Did the Dunbroch family and Mulan make it out? Questions and questions and more questions. I have a rough outline for the next arc but it still needs a bit of refinement but as always, lemme know if you saw all this coming or if you got blown away or if you're just very distressed and want me to be put in the BOX OF SHAME... _again._
> 
> Also were Ruby's first words anti-climactic or WOWE or disappointing or IDK WHAT TO FEEL JUST SCREW YOU STEFI?


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next couple of chapters might not be as fast to produce since yeah I've just about overtaken my own outlines so I'm still trying to plan out where to go from here, but I think I know what I want next and I just have to nail some things down. Also this chapter was almost going to be much shorter? But I figured I made you wait all weekend, so I combined what was supposed to be 23 and 24 to give you this decently-sized chapter.

Everything after being taken away from Ruby had been a blur. There was Dr. Gold and Gaston and being dragged down the hall and being put into handcuffs and being manhandled and just seeing the distress in Ruby's eyes as they were pulled away from each other. Belle had tried to wrestle her way out of their grips and gone back to Ruby, but her limbs felt like jelly and her body hadn't been cooperating.

And now here Belle was, in a small room not unlike the one where she would have her quiet sessions with Ruby. The difference was that the atmosphere was nowhere near welcoming and she was nowhere close to having any semblance of control of the situation.

Having her hands cuffed behind the back of the chair was uncomfortable, making her shoulders stiff and her hands numb. She found herself thinking back to how often they may have done this to Regina and Emma and Ruby. Thinking of it had Belle feeling even more sympathy for them and how they had to put up with this kind of treatment.

As the door opened, she felt her heart skip a beat.

Breathing through her nose, she tried to keep herself calm and collected as Dr. Gold took a seat across her, his own movements stiff and tense.

"Belle," He spoke softly, but there was a hint at his rising temper, just beneath the surface of his tone. Like a ticking time bomb. "What were you doing?"

What was he playing at? Was he trying to get a confession out of her? Was he going to record this and show it to police, conveniently leaving out the part where he himself was torturing people in here?

She was pretty sure she was still in the facility, not in police custody. What did she have to gain by answering him?

Not that she had anything to gain by _not_ answering him either.

"Belle." His voice was still soft, but it sounded strained now. "Why were you in 204's room?"

" _Ruby_." Now that all the planning and preparation had gone down the drain, there was no point in really hiding what they knew. "Her _name_ is Ruby."

Dr. Gold scoffed. "Same thing."

Anger brewed in the pit of Belle's stomach as she glared at Dr. Gold.

"You wanted to get her out just like you somehow got three of my subjects out." Dr. Gold's mouth was stiff, his voice straining to stay even. "Why?"

Trying to adjust herself into a more comfortable position was futile and only further fueled her anger. "Is the fact that you _almost killed her_ not reason enough?" She felt her heart starting to beat faster. "Is the fact that she's painfully underweight and covered in scars not reason enough?"

She could go on forever about how much they destroyed Ruby, but it was doubtful that any of her points would make a difference. Belle instead settled for leaning forward on her seat and tried to steady her heavy breathing. "I can give you a million reasons and you still wouldn't understand."

"And I could give you a million arguments proving that she isn't human and doesn't need your pity." Dr. Gold's lips stiffly curled over his teeth. "But you wouldn't understand either."

He flashed a smile that looked more like a snarl than anything else. "So I believe we are at an impasse."

Belle met his hard eyes, hating every part of him and sickly wishing Ruby's claws had taken more out of his face than just three stripes.

Violence wasn't the answer and it only served to make things worse, only further pushed along a vicious cycle.

But oh, how _badly_ she wished the subjects could just rise up and strike Dr. Gold down, overpower him and destroy him the way he had systematically destroyed every part of them.

"Who helped you?" Dr. Gold was the one to break the silence, though he maintained their eye contact. "A mere guard couldn't have had the capacity to tamper with all of our cameras, phones and radios. You had help. At least two cars were seen leaving the parking lot."

Belle kept her eyes on Dr. Gold and didn't say a word.

"How did you get more than half the staff to loose consciousness without any sedatives?" Dr. Gold was starting to raise his voice now.

And Belle, quiet and unmoving, continued to glare at him.

"Was it _Aurora_? Did she know more than what her research was letting on?" Dr. Gold leaned forward, teeth bared, voice getting louder. "Who else helped you?"

He could yell as much as he wanted, but Belle wasn't going to make it any easier for him to find them. If he wasn't sure about Aurora's involvement and had no clue about Neal and Killian, she would rather keep it that way.

" _BELLE_!" He slammed his hands on the table, admittedly making her flinch and break eye contact, but Belle recovered and leaned back in her seat, glaring up at him.

The way he was leaning over her across the table was making her nervous. Her heart was thudding hard and fast and her palms were getting warm and damp.

But she stood her ground.

Dr. Gold looked just about ready to pounce and with her hands cuffed, Belle wouldn't have had any means to defend herself even if she knew how.

"WHO OVERRODE OUR SYSTEM?" His hands slammed against the table again, "WHO DROVE AWAY WITH MY SUBJECTS?"

Despite her mounting fear and the tremors starting to run through her body, Belle kept her jaw set and her eyes hard. He could intimidate her as much as he wanted, but she wasn't going to make it easy for him to find the ones that got away.

Driving his hands against the table one more time, Dr. Gold glared at her with wild eyes and bared teeth. He looked unhinged and for a moment her fear took her through scenarios where he was going to start cutting into her and treating her like how he treated Ruby.

But she had to stand her ground.

Belle swallowed the lump in her throat and continued to meet his eyes.

Finally, Dr. Gold broke eye contact and straightened up, adjusting his tie and brushing back his grey hair. "Fine." With his tie straightened out, he turned and headed for the door. "Have it your way, dearie." He practically spat the last word out as he opened the door. "Take her to one of the rooms on B2."

* * *

Breathing was difficult as she paced her quarters, dragging the chains behind her, digging her claws into her hands and pressing her fists against her temples.

What just happened?

Belle had talked about taking Ruby somewhere else, somewhere safe.

Ruby.

No.

She wasn't Ruby.

Ruby Lucas was dead.

The subject was almost stolen from this facility and released into the world. A great tragedy had been avoided when those guards came in and stopped Belle from freeing the subject. What happened was the way things were supposed to happen. There was no way that the subject could be allowed to leave this place. She was only going to cause more death and destruction. That's what she was only capable of.

She could barely breathe.

There wasn't enough air coming into her lungs. Her chest felt tight.

But Belle had said that the way the subject controlled herself meant that she wasn't a monster.

Could that possibly be true?

It couldn't. There was no way it could be true. The subject was a monster and killed students and a teacher, two of them being her most treasured friends. No amount of punishment and penance would ever bring them back or make up for so grave a crime.

She was a monster.

A murderer.

A killer.

Belle was _wrong_.

But they shouldn't hurt Belle. She was just trying to help. It was a naïve and misguided attempt to help a monster that shouldn't be helped. They were just going to let her go home, right? She was just being too nice. They couldn't keep her here or punish her or send her to prison for that, could they?

The way they shocked Belle and dragged her away and banged the door closed… It was painful to watch.

It was so hard to breathe. Her body was trembling and she could barely get enough air into her lungs. She felt lightheaded and unsteady.

Then she heard a keycard being pressed against the pad outside, before the door opened and she saw the prod coming towards her and she knew better than to evade it.

The blow went straight for her cheek, sent her against the wall and sliding down to the floor, where she curled up and trembled and tried to breathe.

"What happened here, 204?" Dr. Gold was shouting now, his anger clear and unbridled as he struck her a few more times, across the shoulders, the ribs, the thigh. "I lost possession of three subjects tonight! Who helped them? What happened?"

Curled up into a tight ball, the subject struggled to breathe as the blows rained down all over her. She didn't know the answer to any of his questions. She was just as confused as he was. The words were gone again and she couldn't explain herself.

"I LOST THREE SUBJECTS!" The blows were hitting her hard as he punctuated every word. "THREE. SUBJECTS. _GONE_."

After one particularly hard blow to her head, Dr. Gold threw the prod to the side of the room, where it clattered loudly.

The quiet of the room was broken by their heavy breathing, hers choked and almost like sobs, his ragged and raw.

Blood from her hands was dripping down her arms. She focused on the pain of her claws, focused on the control she had over her hands and focused on the pain of the opened skin. Focused on the tightness of her fist. Focused on the tension that started at her hands and ran down her forearms. Focused on the _pain_.

"I… must say… 204..."

She looked up to see Dr. Gold brushing his hair back and adjusting his tie.

"That you didn't run." He was breathing through his nose now, but the rise and fall of his shoulders showed that he was still winded by the exertion. "We have no cameras to be sure, but I think you were refusing to go with her… weren't you?"

Scared of being struck again and hoping her answer wouldn't invite more anger, the subject nodded.

"Good." Dr. Gold moved over to crouch down in front of her. "Good girl. I'm impressed."

He reached over to her and she flinched before forcing herself to relax as he took hold of her chin and tilted her face up to look at him.

"At least you seem to understand." Dr. Gold's thumb stroked her cheek and she told herself not to pull away. "You understand how dangerous you are. Belle is just very misguided."

The subject looked up at Dr. Gold.

"Eventually, she will understand." Dr. Gold's grip tightened and she closed her eyes, expecting a blow. "For now I have to clean up the mess she and her accomplices have made."

When no blow came, she opened her eyes.

Dr. Gold reached another hand over and she forced herself to be still as he stroked her hair. "You did good, 204."

She swallowed, still scared that he was going to change his mind and tell her she did good but not good enough.

But he was nice this time. He let go of her face and stood up, "Excuse me while I figure out how to fix this." He walked away, leaving an assistant to pick up the discarded prod before they closed the door.

* * *

As she lay on the cot without a pillow or blanket, staring at the ceiling, Belle wondered how Emma and Ruby and all the others could spend hours upon hours like this. She missed her books or at least her phone or tablet. They took her phone off of her and thank god Belle gave it a passcode.

Although there was no telling how long it would take them to unlock the phone and see the texts to Aurora, Mulan, Neal and Killian. As much as Belle tried to keep up with deleting texts whenever Killian, Neal or Mulan reminded her to, it wasn't always easy to remember to do so and sometimes Belle wanted to keep the text as a reminder to herself.

Hopefully that wasn't going to come back to bite her. Maybe they'd just get fed up with Papa's calls and texts that they just turn the phone off or let the battery die.

Speaking of Papa… as far as he knew, Belle was sleeping over at Aurora's again. He was probably going to get suspicious once he realized she wasn't contacting him all of the next day.

It must be nearly morning now.

A commotion from somewhere outside her cell caught Belle's attention. There was yelling and scuffling.

Belle clambered out of bed and went over to the door but trying to pry open the food slot didn't work out so she had to settle for pressing her ear against the door.

"If you're not going to press charges, you can't keep us locked up!" That was Mulan's voice and it was strained and breathless like she was struggling. "Can't you see how messed up this is? Those subjects we help them torture are human beings!"

There were sounds that Belle couldn't distinguish. Thudding and scuffling sounds.

Then there was Gaston's voice. "You can try all you want to accuse us of illegal shit but that doesn't make any of the shit you pulled legal either."

Another thudding sound accompanied a grunt that sounded like Mulan.

Were they hitting her? They couldn't do that.

But after all the other questionable things they'd already done so far, Belle knew they would find a loophole one way or another. The fact remained that Mulan let unauthorized personal into unauthorized places and assisted in the release of at least one known criminal.

If Dr. Gold and his team tried to turn this into a legal mess, Belle and Mulan wouldn't have the resources to fight a good fight. Aurora's family had the resources but it was doubtful that they'd want to get involved.

Unless Neal successfully got hold of footage of the abuse. It was illegally obtained evidence though, would that negate it?

Belle hadn't spent enough time reading up on law and just barely scraped by in those classes. Flopping back down onto her bed, Belle brushed her hair back with her hands before leaning back against the wall. This went downhill so fast and she had no idea how she was going to get herself, Mulan and Ruby out of it.

If only she could talk to Aurora and find out what happened on their side.

It was possible though that Aurora was probably still recuperating and Belle wouldn't be hearing from her any time soon.

Hopefully they got away and stuck to what was left of the plan.

* * *

It had been another rough night. Headache week always came with those. And she was just so damn hungry, thoughts of eating a whole cow were just so oddly vivid in her mind. The meat would feel so good being pulled through her teeth, the juices dribbling down her chin.

Where even were these thoughts coming from?

She frowned into her locker.

And just about jumped when it slammed closed.

Merida.

She was leaning against the locker and glaring. "We need to talk."

This was not a good time. The headaches were bothersome and the hunger was bothersome and she just didn't have the patience to deal with this. "Can't it wait?"

"We've been dancin' 'round this for weeks." Merida moved closer, barely leaving space between them. The smell of the mousse she put into her hair was overpowering. "I'm not some dunderhead. You've got a problem with me and you're not tellin' me about it."

Moving back and away from Merida didn't improve the headache, but at least it eased the nervousness. She turned and started to walk away. "I don't want to do this right now."

A hand grabbed her by the shoulder and pulled her back. On reflex, she pushed the hand away, only for Merida to slam into the lockers with a loud and heavy bang.

Several students paused to see what happened.

"Merida, I'm sorry!" It was always so hard to gauge her strength, especially on headache week. Fear was coursing through her as she moved to see if Merida was hurt.

"The fuck was that?" Merida swatted away any attempts to help before she massaged her shoulder and rolled it. "What is your problem with me?"

" _I don't_ -" Realizing how loud her voice was, she made it a point to lower it. There were a lot of eyes on them already and this was embarrassing. "I don't have a problem with you. We're fine."

"Either you're daft or you think I'm daft." Merida jabbed a finger at her chest. "You've been aloof ever since Dorothy and I got together."

Rubbing at her temples, she tried to keep herself calm and ignore the bubbling agitation. "I have not. I welcome you to our hangouts don't I?"

"You invite me to them and then the whole time it's like you can't even look me in the damn eye."

"That's not-"

"How dense do you think I am?"

Was Merida just using every word for dumb she could find in a thesaurus? And how was she managing to convince herself that she was some kind of enemy here? She was more than welcome to their hangouts, and they'd already started trying to think of a nickname for her. What more did she want? It was bad enough that she was all Dorothy could ever talk about anymore.

Merida's eyes narrowed. "You like her, don't you?"

"No!" That was a ridiculous accusation. "She's my best friend. I'm just a little protective of her, that's all."

"Everyone knows how hard you worked to hook us up." Merida's eyes were burning into her, practically able to see through even the lies she was telling herself. "And now that we're hooked up, you've been distant and moody and it's makin' Dorothy worried and doubtful."

She sighed and looked up, trying to figure out how best to answer this before she gave up and looked down at her shoes. "I'm sorry. I'll be nicer."

"If you wanna snog her so much, why haven't you?" Merida's question was crude and it stirred up the agitation and anger, but it was important to keep calm and stay in control.

There wasn't any point in answering a question like that. She didn't want to snog Dorothy. She… didn't want to be with Dorothy like that.

She _didn't_.

"You can lie to her about it and you can try to lie to me about it and you can even fuckin' lie to yourself about it, but it's _there_ , isn't it?" Merida's tone was cold, somewhere between warning and accusing.

And it was hard to figure out how to answer it.

"Get your shite together, Lucas." Merida rolled her shoulders, and she looked sore from the impact with the lockers. "'Tis no fault of mine that you don't like seeing us together. So don't you be taking your bottled up feelings out on me."

She couldn't come up with an answer. Not even a denial or an excuse or a deflection.

With a huff and a glare, Merida turned and walked away.

* * *

It was hard to say how long she'd been stuck in here, especially not with any way to write down how many meals she'd been given. But they did turn off the lights at least once. And then it had been hard to fall asleep, and when she did fall asleep, it was light and fitful and riddled with anxiety.

Papa would be so worried.

Were the others okay? What was going to happen now? Shouldn't Dr. Gold be turning Belle and Mulan over to the police already? What was he hoping to accomplish by keeping them here? What was going on?

With nothing to do for hours and hours, Belle could only let her mind run wild with questions and scenarios. She held a newfound sympathy and admiration for the subjects who managed to live like this for years without going insane.

As the door started to open, Belle was almost relieved to see human beings again, even if they were guards who roughly jostled her out of her cell and down the hall. She had to ignore the urge to ask them questions, sensing that it would only irritate them. Gaston in particular looked like he was in a foul mood.

They took her to a room with a table again, although this time instead of cuffing her hands behind her back, they cuffed her left wrist to the table leg and left her waiting for whatever was to come next.

What was going to happen now? Even if she knew it was no use, Belle tugged at the cuff. It held fast and trying to pull at it only bruised her wrist.

The door opened again for Dr. Gold to walk in holding some files. He took the seat across Belle and pushed one set of papers towards her.

"We know your father is looking for you." Dr. Gold said, arranging papers in front of himself as well. "And you probably would like to be reunited with him, so let's make this simple."

Belle looked at Dr. Gold, wondering how he managed to think that this mess of a situation could somehow be simplified.

"Let's make a deal." Dr. Gold's smile was forced and uncomfortable. "Dearie, in front of you is a contract. The gist of it is that you're to sever ties with Baelfire Research Center. You are not to come back and you are not to speak of anything you have seen or heard. In return, we won't take legal action against you for your theft, kidnapping and vandalism."

Never coming back to this place? Just walking away from it all and not talking about it and just continuing to let them keep torturing their prisoners? That was out of the question and Belle pushed the papers back towards Dr. Gold.

"No."

Dr. Gold's eyes widened and he almost reminded Belle of a ruffled chicken. "What? Why?"

What difference would Belle's silence make if Neal had already started putting the Baelfire database up online? Or it was possible that Neal hadn't been able to do that yet. Belle wanted to play that card but wasn't sure if it was too soon.

"You have three subjects running lose." Belle pointed out. "What difference would my silence make?"

Anger was burning in Dr. Gold's eyes as his smile started to look more like a sneer. "It could mean one less loose end for us to tie, given that we have more than just three after someone on your team started uploading our research."

And that was what Belle was hoping to hear. Good job, Neal!

"So your database is now out in the open, isn't it?" Belle couldn't help herself from smirking. It felt so good to finally be able to express what she felt after having to wrap herself around him for weeks.

"It's a mess to clean up." Dr. Gold grumbled as he rifled through the papers. "It would be easier if it was just data. We could call it a hoax. But I've seen some footage already starting to come up. It would be easier to say the videos are fake or staged if some of our scientists… and myself included… weren't _visible_ in those videos. We're working on taking those clips down but it's taking some time. We're also having trouble tracing where the uploads are coming from."

"Good."

Dr. Gold glared at Belle and there was a visible struggle to keep his voice calm. "So I would _appreciate_ it, Belle, dearie, if you helped us out and told us who is the one who tampered with our system and stole our data."

"No."

"Don't you want to go home? Your father's been calling your phone and leaving some very worried texts."

That hit a chord. Belle felt her anger falter as she thought about Papa, worried about a daughter who suddenly stopped replying and didn't come home. He had some idea of where Aurora's apartment could be found, but if the team had all stuck to the plan, they wouldn't be at Aurora's and there should be no hint as to where they would be staying.

After losing his wife, Papa had been quite protective of Belle. They only had each other.

And now he had no idea where his daughter was.

Belle had to remind herself why she was doing this. From the beginning, she knew that the risk she was taking was going to change everything and turn her life upside down. There was no way she could just walk away from what she knew was the right thing to do.

"I'm not leaving here without Ruby."

Dr. Gold scoffed, "Why?"

They had already been through this several times in their last meeting. What more did he want from her?

"Do the lives her blood saved mean nothing to you? Do the people she killed when she was outside mean nothing to you?" Dr. Gold asked, "Why are you so willing to risk innocent lives and the future of science to save that broken animal? She doesn't even _want_ to be saved."

"She _did_." Belle couldn't have imagined it. "There was a moment. I saw it in her eyes. She almost believed me." And freedom had just been at the very tips of Ruby's fingers, only to be violently pulled away.

"She didn't want to go with you and that's why you're here now and that's why that worthless guard is here now too." Dr. Gold almost smiled when Belle faltered at the mention of Mulan.

"She was scared and that's all because of what you've done to her." Belle felt her anger coming back and she leaned forward in her seat, meeting his eyes with a glare of her own. "Nothing is worth the torture and brainwashing you've put Ruby through."

Dr. Gold looked furious. "We're done here." He turned towards the door. "Take her back to her room." His order was all but instantly obeyed by guards filing into the room. Belle knew better than to fight them off as they uncuffed her from the table and led her out into the hallway. "When we talk again, let me know if you still think she's worth all the trouble you're putting yourself through."

As she was being roughly shoved and pulled forward, Belle saw several guards moving another charge into the room. With a jolt, Belle realized it was Mulan.

She'd been stripped of her uniform and gear, left in just the undershirt, pants and boots. But what caught Belle's attention were the bruises and how Mulan's face now featured a black eye, a bloody nose and swollen lips. They just barely managed to exchange looks before Mulan was brought into the room and Belle was moved further down the hall.

"Why are you beating her?" Belle demanded, now trying to dig her heels in and go back to the room. "You can't just do that to her!"

Gaston twisted her arm painfully behind her back, forcing her to stop resisting and allow him to lead her forward. "You're just lucky Gold's still too into you to have us knock you around."

The words made Belle sick to her stomach.

When she finally was locked up back in her room, she slid down to the floor and dug her fingers into her hair, wishing for Aurora or Emma to reach out and say something and give an answer because right now, Belle didn't have any answers anymore.

She wanted Mulan and Ruby out of here. Belle wanted _herself_ out of here too.

Gold was the monster.

Belle remembered Regina and Emma talking about how he was too used to the power he had over his subjects and the free reign he had over Ruby. That was starting to cross over to how he was treating other people now, too.

And it was frightening.

* * *

"Just hold still, this will be over in just a bit." She looked away as the needle went into her skin and drew out her blood. "There we go. Thank you, 204."

Dr. Hopper put away his medical equipment and started packing up. It was hard to say if this was a routine check-up or if the full moon was coming up again. Her headaches hadn't started yet though so it could just be the former.

But she didn't want him to leave yet.

"We're about done here." Dr. Hopper's smile was almost forced as he picked up his box. "Get some rest, 204."

He was going to leave and she didn't want him to yet. He started to turn around.

Without thinking about it long enough to stop herself, the subject reached out and grasped Dr. Hopper's wrist. He was startled by the contact but turned back to look at her. "204, please let go."

No. She couldn't let him just walk away. She needed to know what happened.

The words were hard to get out. There were so many questions. So much she needed to know. She wanted to know if they were going to hurt Belle. If they let Belle go home. If they sent Belle to prison. If they were checking to see if the subject had infected Belle. If they were trying to infect Belle.

She just needed to know if Belle was okay.

But it was hard to get the words out and she felt her face tensing up as she tried to speak.

Finally, she managed to work out one word. One question. "Belle?"

Dr. Hopper's wide eyes were magnified by his glasses as he looked at her. "Did you just… speak?"

She nodded, hoping he wasn't going to ask her to speak again. The subject clutched at his hand and looked up at him, wishing he could give her some answers or at least reassure her that Belle was going to be okay.

Instead, Dr. Hopper pried his hand free from the subject and shook his head. "I can't tell you anything, 204. Dr. Gold doesn't want any information being revealed without his clearance."

With rapidly mounting distress, the subject watched Dr. Hopper walk away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is still a very rough outline I'm trying to figure out. But it'll have a pretty big Merida scene, I think.
> 
> But yeah, let me know how you found this chapter and what you're dreading will happen next.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is sponsored by Konako's comments and Wolfie's reactions. Also it's juuust a bit shorter than average. I hope that's okay.

It had been another fitful, anxiety-ridden attempt at sleep. All she could see was Mulan's battered face and the slump to her body as the guards dragged her into the interrogation room.

After seeing Mulan as this strong, tall, tough person who could see a threat and react quickly, who could beat Killian and Neal at arm wrestling, who could lift boxes of their food and booze without blinking, who could easily move Aurora's furniture around so they could all be comfortable… it was hard to see that same person slumped over in the arms of guards she once worked and ate with.

How were they going to get themselves out of this? Would Neal, Killian and Aurora come back for them? Would Emma and Regina risk getting imprisoned again to come back and help? Was it worth the risk? Or should they just let things play out and see what other games Dr. Gold wanted to play with his prisoners?

The thought of seeing what else he had planned for them was terrifying and Belle couldn't settle down knowing that this was a man who systematically broke down his victims until they were stripped of their sense of self.

Belle had been so close to getting Ruby out, but she wasn't ready.

She almost was. Belle had seen it in her eyes. There was a spark. It had been small and brief, but _it had been there._ It was really there for a moment, Belle was sure of it. And she hated how Ruby had been given hope for the briefest of moments, only for that to be stripped away.

The lights suddenly came on, blinding her. Belle squinted and draped an arm over her face as guards came into her room and ordered her to get up.

Still adjusting to the light, Belle unsteadily got to her feet and let them cuff her hands behind her back before leading her out the door and down the hallway. They passed a few twists and turns before stopping at a door that was starting to look very familiar. Belle didn't resist as they sat her down and left.

Dr. Gold was probably going to come in and talk to her again, wear her down and make her think about Papa and how worried and distressed he must be. It was upsetting, not knowing what information was circulating on the outside and if Papa had some idea that his daughter was being held captive in the place where she used to happily work.

As the door opened again, Belle was instead surprised to see the guards dragging someone else into the room, hands also cuffed behind her back. She was shoved into the seat before the guards closed the door and left them alone.

The girl had red hair, cut just about as close as Ruby's, but textured differently, the short strands hinting at curls. Though her face was structured more round than long, she still looked almost as gaunt as Ruby did, with heavy bags under her eyes and a sunken look to her cheeks. A key difference though was that Merida seemed to at least be better fed, her limbs and neck not as thin as Ruby's.

"Merida?" It was strange seeing her in person for the first time, even if the walkthroughs with Aurora had given Belle something of an image of Merida. On top of that, she looked _so_ different from the youthful yearbook picture Mulan had shown.

Dr. Gold had taken away the normal lives that Merida and Ruby could have had, turning them into these shells of themselves and treating them like animals.

Letting out a deep sigh, Merida looked at Belle. "What?"

Even if they were probably being monitored and recorded, even if a conversation about the plan and their accomplices was probably what Dr. Gold was hoping for, Belle needed to ask. "Did any of your family make it out? What happened that night?"

Merida shrugged. "They caught us."

"Are your brothers okay?" It was a stupid question and Belle knew that, but she was at a loss for what else she could say. "Your mother?"

Slouching in her chair, Merida shrugged again. "As okay as you can expect after being given some hope of escape and watching that get snatched way."

Belle couldn't imagine how it must have felt, to be so close to freedom only to be locked up all over again and treated like an animal all over again. "I'm sorry…"

"Mum had her doubts from the start." Merida looked away from Belle and slouched lower. "I convinced my brothers we could get out. We convinced mum and now… we're all going to be fucked over all over again." Sighing again, Merida shrugged, "I'm surprised they haven't taken away mum's hair yet."

"What do you mean?"

Merida looked Belle up and down before speaking, "Not that I've got any proof, but I'm pretty sure they cut off my hair to spite me. They'd never done it to mum. And we all wear the same scanners all over our heads."

It was probably part of the sick and twisted games he played with the people he viewed as his possessions. Belle thought about how Emma and Regina hadn't been shaved while Ruby and Merida had. It didn't seem to be a standardized practice, more of something Dr. Gold did on a whim if not to punish his subjects.

"What have you told Gold?" Belle asked, figuring that if Merida and her family had already spoken to Dr. Gold and told him whatever they knew, then it wouldn't make a difference for Belle to ask. At least she would have a better idea of what information had already been revealed.

"What little we knew." Merida answered. "Which isn't much, really. Just that some girl, Aurora, talked to us in our heads and told us we had a few days to be ready to escape. And we got ready. Then that guard, Mulan led us out."

Merida was starting to get tense as she brought herself back to that night. Her brow furrowed and her voice hardened. "The other guards came out o' nowhere, Mulan tried to fight 'em off and we tried to fight 'em off. They slugged her hard, shocked her with the prod… then _that sound._ "

Wincing as she remembered it, Merida's voice cracked, "That sound that makes our ears hurt. Makes our heads hurt. Brought us to our knees, it did. And the next thing we knew, we were in our cells. Again." The despair hardened into anger. "If I could, I'd burn this damn place to the ground for what it's doing to my family."

"I'm sorry…" Guilt weighed heavily in Belle as she tried to offer Merida some comfort, "I'm sorry you didn't get all the way out… We… We didn't account for the number of staff, and we didn't account for how long it would take to convince Ruby to-"

" _Ruby_." Merida straightened up, the anger in her face intensifying. "Ruby is the whole reason my brothers and I are in here."

Belle's initial, knee-jerk reaction was to defend Ruby, but she swallowed it down and kept her voice calm as she asked, "What do you mean?"

There was suspicion in Merida's eyes now as she looked over at Belle. "How well do you know Ruby, really? You and your escape team? How well do any of you _really_ know _Ruby Lucas_?"

That… was a question that Belle hadn't expected to be asked. She had to think over it for a moment before answering, "Mulan was in the same school as you two were. She was a senior while you two were freshmen. I… I know a little about her from my sessions with her."

Belle didn't feel ready to divulge much of Emma's abilities just yet. They didn't need to know that Belle had spent time in Ruby's head, viewing the world through Ruby's eyes and feeling the past through Ruby's guilt.

"Y'know about the wolf thing, aye?" Merida asked.

"I know about the wolf thing."

"And the murdering her friends and classmates thing?"

"I… yes."

"She's a monster. A _demon_." Merida's face was stiff with anger as the past played out before her. "Dorothy was just trying to help her. Dorothy was sticking up for her when that arsehole teacher was picking on them."

Looking closely, Belle saw that Merida's shoulders were starting to tremble. "You know what she did to Dorothy? You know what Dorothy got in return for bein' a damn good friend to her? Ruby fuckin' threw her across the room! Slammed her into a bookshelf. Gold said the impact broke her neck."

Belle felt sick imagining the scene, trying to think of Ruby, frightened and overwhelmed by her abilities, lashing out at someone just trying to help. And Merida, witnessing that and haunted by the memories of it.

"And when everyone started throwing a fit and freaking out and screamin' and running around, she just went wild, pouncing on anyone who came near, tearing into people, throwing people around." Merida was trembling and her teeth chattered as she spoke. "I wanted to hurt her after what she did to Dorothy, I wanted to make her pay. She bit me and left me bleeding on the floor. Then the men in uniform came in and shot her until she blacked out."

A sound coming from Merida almost resembled a growl. Belle was surprised to notice that blue eyes had warmed into amber. "She ruined _everything_!"

"Merida-"

" _DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN._ " Merida snapped, jerking her chair forward as she leaned over the table. "Whatever thing mum has was supposed to be dormant in me and my brothers. If it weren't for Ruby biting me, I wouldn't be here for them to cut into and study. If it weren't for Ruby, they wouldn't have been so eager to see if the dormant curse could be woken in my brothers. If it weren't for Ruby, they wouldn't have found a way to trigger it."

Heart thudding against her chest, Belle swallowed and couldn't find the right words to calm Merida.

"I have trouble controlling it." Merida's jaw looked stiff and tense, and as she spoke, Belle noticed unusually sharp canines. "More than mum and my brothers and I'm _sure_ it's because of Ruby. And Gold can cut me and burn me and do whatever he wants with me because I heal like Ruby while my mum and brothers don't."

Merida growled again, then closed her eyes. Her body was shaking and she seemed to be struggling to still it.

It took several heavy breaths, but Merida managed to steady herself and when she opened her eyes, they were blue again. "We were doing our best to be a normal family and Ruby _destroyed_ that. Ruby destroyed the girl I was finally allowing myself to fall for. Ruby destroyed everything."

Belle was at a loss, could only shift uncomfortably in her seat, could only look at Merida and see the pain she felt and imagine the years she spent festering her anger.

Though her eyes were back to their cool color, the burning hatred in them was still very prominent. "If I ever cross paths with her in this place, she is _not_ going to walk away from me in one piece."

* * *

The sight of the muzzle brought back memories of not being able to breathe, of feeling her stomach lurch and throwing up and feeling the vomit spill out the sides and slits and getting it all over her face. She remembered the sourness in her throat, the stinging in her nose. She remembered feeling like she was drowning.

Digging her claws into her hands, she told herself to stay calm and still as they buckled the straps behind her head.

Once it was firmly over her face, she just had to focus on breathing normally. What happened last time wasn't necessarily going to happen again. She just had to stay calm.

The guards led her down the hall and she couldn't help but miss Mulan and notice how she had been absent lately. Maybe she was on leave and taking a break. Hopefully she hadn't been caught on the cameras playing with the subject in the shower room. Hopefully they hadn't fired her. She was nice.

They brought her to a room with monitors and machines, leading her to a chair where she was strapped down so the assistants could put the scanners all over her. The subject stayed still as they did this. She wanted to be cooperative and make up for all the mistakes.

But it was hard not to flinch when Tamara walked over.

"Looks like we might need to give you a trim sometime." Tamara clutched at a tuft of the subject's hair. "This is getting unruly. Maybe after the session. What do you think, Dr. Whale?"

Dr. Whale's voice came through the speakers. "We could have that arranged. Equipment is ready. You can begin."

"So, 204," Tamara stood in front of the subject. "You were almost stolen a few nights ago. Are you aware of that?"

The subject nodded.

"Good, we want t-"

"B-" It was hard to get the words out, and her voice echoed in the muzzle, but she managed to speak. "Belle?"

Tamara's eyebrows shot up as genuine surprise came over her. "Did you just…" She blinked, her carefully relaxed, mildly amused expression back in place. "Did you catch that, sir?"

"Yes. I'll make a note of that for Dr. Gold."

They weren't answering her. She just needed to know if Belle was okay. If she was safe. The way they had dragged her away had been more rough than necessary and the subject was worried.

"Belle?" The subject tried again, her voice still husky and rough, but just a little bit louder.

"She's alive." Tamara answered. "And none of your concern, 204." The statement was punctuated by a prod making contact with the subject's thigh, sending jolts of painful electricity up and down her limbs.

When it stopped, the subject was left slumping into the chair and breathing heavily.

A part of her -the wolf part of her- was angered by the unprovoked attack, but she swallowed it down.

"What we _do_ want you to be concerned about is a certain guard," Tamara pushed a button and behind her, against the wall, flashed a picture of Mulan. It was formal, with a plain white background and neatly tied hair and a collared shirt. There was something about the picture that was odd, and the subject realized it was when Mulan was a few years younger. This must be a picture from when Mulan first got her job, maybe? "Mulan Li. You're familiar with her, I'm sure."

Looking away from the picture of Mulan, the subject focused on Tamara and nodded.

And another jolt of electricity coursed through her. It was burning pain. Her muscles tightened, her limbs shook in her restraints.

Then it stopped.

Her heavy breathing was magnified by the muzzle.

"She's trouble." Tamara said, "She assisted in the theft and kidnapping of three subjects from this facility."

Mulan wouldn't do that!

Would she?

Burning pain coursed through her body again. Her muscles were spasming and she had no control of her body as it thrashed and jerked in the restraints.

And it stopped again.

This was getting frustrating and she found herself starting to get angry.

"That's good." Tamara grasped the hair at the back of the subject's head, keeping her face focused on the screen. "You're getting worked up. You should be."

The screen then flashed footage of the shower room, of when Mulan left the subject unchained.

It was surreal. The subject rarely thought of what she looked like, let alone saw what she looked like. How could that skinny person be her? But she knew it was her because the person was holding the chain and gesturing for Mulan to secure it.

Another jolt of pain burned through her. This time she screamed and struggled to get away.

When it stopped, the subject was breathless and sweating and agitated.

"Look how unprofessional she is." Tamara had let go when she shocked the subject, but went and grabbed her hair again. "She could have caused irreparable damage by leaving a creature like you lose like that!"

A growl rumbled in the subject's throat as she nodded.

That had been very wrong of Mulan.

They continued to play the footage, of Mulan inviting the subject to play.

Seeing it from this view, it was strange. A part of her felt a twisted sense of pity for the scrawny figure starting to smile and play with the guard. A part of her recalled the memory fondly and appreciated how Mulan got the subject to smile again.

Another part of her was angry with Mulan for treating the subject with kindness and getting the subject to smile when she didn't deserve either. The subject deserved the pain and misery she went through. That was what monsters deserved.

The jolt of electricity was painful as it made her body spasm. Her wrists and ankles burned and bruised as she thrashed and screamed.

When it stopped, she was growling and angry and her eyes were warming up.

"I'm not the enemy here, 204." Tamara was saying, "You and I both know who's been breaking the rules and putting people at risk."

Her breathing was ragged through the muzzle and her jaw was stiff and another growl rumbled in her throat.

She felt disconnected. A part of her was angry at Tamara and her stupid prod. Angry at how she was jabbing at the subject and getting her riled up and making her agitated and trying to wake up the wolf. That was one side of it.

But the real side of things was that Tamara was right. Mulan wasn't treating the subject the way she was supposed to be treated. Mulan was breaking rules. Mulan was putting the facility at risk.

The subject was angry.

Maybe she was supposed to be angry at Mulan?

No. She didn't want to be. Mulan was just trying to be nice. There couldn't be anything wrong with that. It was just like Belle was trying to be nice. They just didn't know any better. They didn't need anger directed at them. They just needed to be more aware of the dangers of being so attached to the subject.

They didn't need her anger.

Another jolt of electricity got her all riled up again, got her angry and agitated and growling again.

* * *

The conversation with Merida had been sobering.

Belle had gotten herself caught up in saving Ruby and helping her heal, it was sometimes easy to overlook the fact that Ruby had ruined some very real lives. The deaths on her hands couldn't completely be attributed to her fault. Belle could see how hard it was for Ruby to control the wolf's primal urges, and that must have been a very stressful time in her life.

But people still _died_ and people were still _hurt_.

Merida's anger was a little misplaced, since Dr. Gold's actions were his own and not Ruby's. But that didn't mean the feelings weren't valid. Ruby _did_ play a particular part in Merida's reasons for being angry.

That aside, Belle still refused to fully put blame on Ruby's shoulders. She was suffering from something that turned her into a _wolf_ every full moon and threatened to trigger at heightened emotions. Put that together with the hormones and distress of an overwhelmed teenager and you just about have a recipe for disaster.

As the hours stretched by, Belle wished again for some contact with Aurora and the others outside. Some sign that they were safe. _Anything_.

She was fed another dry meal of some ground meat and canned vegetables. It was tasteless and Belle wasn't particularly hungry, but she emptied the tray more out of boredom than anything else. After that, she paced her cell before flopping back onto the bed.

Fidgeting with her hands and her hair, Belle almost wished for Dr. Gold to summon her and have another pointless conversation with her about some deal he wanted to make. As the lights in her room went off, Belle knew she was in for another fitful sleep.

 _Belle_.

Upon hearing Aurora's familiar voice, Belle shot up into a sitting position. _Aurora? Is that really you?_ Excitement bubbled through Belle as she felt Aurora's presence.

 _Yeah, it's me._ Aurora wasn't visible to Belle, but she could feel the worry and tiredness. It dimmed down the initial excitement at being able to talk to each other again. _Sorry we couldn't get in touch sooner. That night really took a lot out of Neal, Emma and myself._

 _That's fine_. As much as Belle missed them and as much as being on the edge just waiting for news from the outside world kept her restless, she knew that Aurora and the rest of the team needed to recover. What they did had been so much bigger than what any of them had ever done before and it was an achievement enough that they rescued almost half the people that had to be rescued. _How are you? Are you safe?_

 _We are, I think_. Aurora was still worried, and Belle was getting some images of Mulan, but they turned into images of the group huddled together in a basement. Emma had her arm around Regina's shoulders as they sat under the stairs. Aurora was by herself in one corner. Neal was hunched over a laptop and several external drives. Killian was out. The images didn't come with as strong of a lurching feeling in her stomach. Belle figured Aurora was projecting the images instead of pulling Belle to their location.

_Where's Elsa?_

_She left to join her sister. They were planning to drive to another state._

Belle wondered if Elsa resented her as much as Merida resented Ruby.

_She doesn't blame you. She would have thanked you if she could, for insisting on including her._

It still felt wrong to be deciding who could be free and who could stay. The list of nine subjects they first came up with had been more out of urgency and lack of resources. If it were up to Belle, she would have agreed with Emma and worked on freeing everyone they could.

 _We might try that._ Aurora was nervous and uneasy as she thought of Neal and another big risk they were going to have to take. _We're still trying to figure out a plan, but Neal might be able to short circuit the security system to open most if not all of the doors. It's not a solid plan yet. We're still trying to work things out._

 _I feel like Gold's patience is wearing thin_. Belle admitted, thinking of how angry he got on their last meeting. _He's losing his grip on what he can and can't do to people._

 _He is_. Aurora's worry was back, stronger than ever and coated in anger. _He's trying to figure out a way to get rid of Mulan without it looking too bad on his part. I've seen him talking to Whale and their team about putting her in a room with Ruby on a full moon or while she's having a fit. I'm scared and she's scared and Belle, they keep_ hurting _her._

 _I know._ Belle still remembered how battered Mulan looked when they last saw each other.

 _We have to save her._ A rush of emotion was going through Aurora. Deep worry and fear and concern for Mulan. Belle felt stunned by the strength of Aurora's feelings. They must have developed a strong connection to each other somewhere in between their planning and road-tripping.

Aurora was fretting and her mind kept playing out images of Mulan being beaten by Gaston and Gold and how Mulan just kept refusing to fold, refusing to tell them about Neal and the test of the team.

 _Tell me about what it's like where you are_. Belle wanted to get Aurora's mind off of it, not to downplay Mulan's suffering, but just so they could both try to calm down. It was getting them worked up and Belle was starting to feel the urge to pound into the door for no reason other than to demand they treat Mulan better. If they had the decency to treat Belle with some semblance of humanity, why couldn't they extend the same to Mulan?

 _Tell me how everyone is doing._ Belle wanted to get her mind focused. Both she and Aurora needed to be focused and not panicking if they were to figure out their next move.

_Emma's still drained, but I think tomorrow night we can both use our abilties, that way we can reach more people because for now I can only handle one at a time. Regina has been having panic attacks and she's scared her mother will find her. She's pent up and has lashed out a few times but Emma is good at calming her down. Neal is hard at work uploading the files and footage. Killian has been keeping us supplied and is always monitoring the news._

_What's the news?_

Aurora's distress over Mulan was still there, but she was calming down. _There's a lot of debate going on, for and against the psychics, cryptids and shapeshifters. Some people started staging protests outside the facility so it might be hard to go in and sneak you out like last time._

_Can Neal steal current footage?_

There was a hint of doubt in Aurora as she replied. _He still needs to recover, but I think he could try. It'll be hard though, to do it from a distance and hard to do it unnoticed since they seem to be more careful now. Neal thinks that they're starting to suspect that their attacker was a psychic and not a typical hacker._

That would prove to be tricky… But if Neal could upload current, even _live_ footage, it would make things more complicated for Dr. Gold. People would know he was beating and torturing one of his guards instead of having a proper investigation and firing her or sending her to the police like a normal person would.

 _We'll see what we can do_. Aurora's worry for Mulan was overwhelming.

Belle had a feeling Aurora wanted to wrap up the conversation so she could check on Mulan again. If anything, Mulan needed the comfort and companionship more than Belle did.

 _You don't mind?_ Aurora asked. _If I finish up so I can be with her?_

 _Go ahead._ Belle felt Aurora's connection start to falter.

_I'll bring Emma tomorrow night. We can talk again then. Good night, Belle._

_'Night, Aurora._

And Belle was left alone with her thoughts once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting tense. I'm pretty sure their methods of conditioning Ruby are off but with how unstable Ruby already is, we'll see if their new tests are going to work.
> 
> Also I like how Merida is like a foil to Ruby. They have similar abilities and were confined around the same time. (I mean they're 204 and 206 after all). But Merida doesn't carry the weight of people's deaths on her paws while Ruby doesn't have the family and support system that Merida has.
> 
> I can't wait to force them into a room together.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter... finished a lot faster than I initially anticipated so yay? It surprises me because it was a longer chapter?

As much as she would rather not admit it, Belle was getting tired. She wished she could wake up back in her bedroom, shuffle into the bathroom and have a nice hot shower. Just be in there so long that her fingers could get wrinkled. Make the water so hot that being in there eventually made it hard to breathe.

Just _escape_ for a bit.

But as the lights came on without warning and the door opened, Belle knew this was a reality she was going to have to live with for a while. Through bleary eyes, she pulled herself out of bed and felt the handcuffs click behind her back.

After Aurora left, sleep had been fitful. It was mostly tossing and turning and entertaining thought after anxious thought before her body finally just pulled her into unconsciousness.

And now, here she was again, cuffed to a chair in a room that she now considered the Interrogation Room. Waiting for her fate, Belle wasn't sure if she was supposed to expect Dr. Gold to come in again with another deal; Merida again to break down Belle's notions of Ruby; Ruby herself maybe so she could be triggered into proving to Belle that 204 was just an animal; maybe even Mulan, to be paraded as a threat of what could happen to Belle next.

When the door opened, Belle kept her expression neutral as Dr. Gold entered and sat across her. He wasn't bringing papers with him this time, but Belle suspected he was still here to try to negotiate.

"Did you have a good talk with Merida yesterday?" Dr. Gold asked, "She's Subject 206, in case you didn't know that."

Belle didn't answer.

"I hope you're not taking a page out of 204's book and giving me the silent treatment now, dearie." Dr. Gold put his elbows on the table and rubbed his hands together before clasping them. "We wouldn't want that."

"What do you want then?" Belle asked even if she knew he was probably going to ask her again how Aurora used her abilities or who tampered with their system.

Dr. Gold shrugged and smiled like they were having this conversation over coffee and it was appropriate to be coy. "Your cooperation perhaps? Please?"

Belle set her jaw and lifted her chin.

The smile fell from Dr. Gold's face, replaced by a genuinely annoyed expression. "Come now, Belle, dearie. We don't have to make this so complicated. How about I give you a new proposition."

Standing up from his chair, Dr. Gold walked around the table until he was behind Belle. She stiffened as his hands touched her shoulders, kneading them with his bony fingers. Belle swallowed and hoped his hands wouldn't go any lower.

"You could nicely tell me what Aurora did and who else tampered with our system and our staff. Maybe also tell us where we might be able to find them." Dr. Gold's hands continued to massage Belle's shoulders, making her skin prickle and her chest tighten. "In return, you get to leave in one piece. You can be with your father again."

Belle tried to shake him off but his fingers only tightened their grip on her. "I'm not leaving without Ruby and Mulan. And the Dunbroch family too."

Dr. Gold's fingers started digging into her shoulders, some of them painfully pressing into hollow spots between bones and joints. Belle's breath caught in her throat and she couldn't help but wince.

"Are you really in such a position to negotiate, dearie?"

Trying not to whimper or cry out, Belle breathed through her nose and lifted her head. "Then I guess we don't have a deal."

When Dr. Gold moved his hands off, Belle just barely had time to exhale before he'd taken hold of her jaw, palm against her chin, fingers against her cheeks. "Why does 204 mean so much to you? Has what she did to Merida not changed your mind at all?"

Belle tried to move her head away but he just tightened his grip, his fingers pressing her cheeks inwards.

"204 _killed_ people." Dr. Gold moved his other hand to brush Belle's hair out of her face. It was hard to keep the fear out of her face when her heart was hammering so fast and her knees were starting to tremble. "Granted, Merida may have exaggerated a tad. And she's a little misguided sometimes. But the fact remains that 204 killed a mutual friend of theirs and attacked Merida herself. That's not even including the teacher and the other students that were killed that day."

Though her body was giving away her fear with its tremors, Belle kept her glare hard and focused on Dr. Gold.

The relaxed, toying expression on his face faded away. "Belle, you're rooting for a criminal at best, an inhuman creature at worst. Is that really worth all the panic and loss your father is now going through?"

At the mention of her father, Belle felt herself falter for a moment. He was all alone and probably terrified that something terrible had happened or was happening to his daughter. If there was only a way to get out of this and tell him what happened, explain why Belle was making the stand that she was.

But she couldn't make any deals that would leave Ruby and Mulan to terrible fates.

Finally, Dr. Gold let go and started to walk away. "Let's try again another time then."

* * *

The headaches were making it hard to concentrate on Dr. Whale's words. Pain was pounding through her head as she squirmed against the restraints keeping her strapped to the chair. She breathed through the pain, digging her nails into her palms and almost wishing she had the stuffed lion she left in her room.

When the bout of pain finally passed, she was breathing heavily through the muzzle and looking up at Dr. Whale.

On screen was more footage of Mulan. This time showing her holding the subject's hand and calming her down.

That had been a moment that the subject had greatly appreciated. Mulan helped keep the subject from losing control. It was also while Tamara and Dr. Gold were cutting into the subject that she found strength in making eye contact with Mulan.

As if to put a stop to those positive thoughts, agony burned through her body. The jolts of electricity made her spasm and thrash in her bonds, bruising and cutting into her wrists and ankles, neck and waist.

When the pain stopped, she was limp in her chair, struggling to regain her breath.

Why were they doing this to her? She could feel the wolf growing agitated, itching to come out and lash out. With the full moon coming up, it was already getting hard to stay in control, but with these new tests, it was even harder.

"You're not angry with us, 204." Dr. Whale was saying, "You're angry with Mulan Li."

Was she?

Well Mulan _did_ break so many rules and got far too attached to the subject, showing way too much kindness and gentleness. It was dangerous and wrong. Mulan was wrong.

It _did_ make the wolf angry. It made the subject angry.

But she also felt angry with Dr. Whale and Tamara and Dr. Gold and everyone who cut her and shocked her and hurt her.

"The tests we're doing now are because Mulan is a criminal." Dr. Whale said. "She broke our rules and stole our subjects."

She wasn't ready for the burst of burning, jolting pain. It travelled up and down her body, her muscles contracted and shook. A wail echoed in her muzzle as she thrashed and wished it would just stop.

When it finally did, she was just about tempted to take a bite out of Dr. Whale.

And the thought of that scared her.

She didn't want to lash out and bite or claw at anyone. She didn't want to do that anymore.

"She was wrong to break protocol, wasn't she?" Dr. Whale came close with the prod and the subject actually found herself growling at him. That only made him smile. "That's it, 204. Get angry, but not at us. We're only doing our best to contain you. Ms. Li however, has only been doing her best to release a danger out into the world."

The anger of the wolf was making it hard to think and process things clearly. She just wanted to snap and claw and tear. Her eyes were warming up and her hands were bleeding all over the armrests of the chair.

Belle was just trying to help. Mulan… was also just trying to help, wasn't she?

But Mulan knew better. She was trained to know better. And still, she broke the rules.

"She released three subjects out into the world and was about to release five more dangerous beasts." Dr. Whale then flashed a picture of the classroom. The bodies all over the floor, the blood all over the walls, the broken chairs and tables and broken people. "She wanted this to happen again. You don't want that, do you?"

Another growl rumbled in her throat.

They had a point.

* * *

When she shared space in Emma's head, Belle thought she understood what it was like for Emma to be restless and angry. She thought she understood the frustration and pent up energy.

But now, just about exactly in Emma's place, Belle felt like she truly understood what it felt like to pace the small space, wringing her hands and trying not to pull at her hair. She could understand why Ruby dug her nails into her hands. She could understand why Emma punched the door until her knuckles bled. She could understand why Merida vividly imagined her vengeance.

In such a small room, with no mental, physical, social or even emotional stimulation other than being brought outside for whatever Dr. Gold had planned, it was easy to develop self-destructive habits just to stay sane, just to feel some semblance of control in a situation where there was absolutely no control.

Belle didn't know if she wanted to throw herself at the door or pull all her hair out or peel the skin at her fingertips and around her nails.

She needed something to do other than think and think and think about how stuck they were and how dangerous it was for Aurora and the rest to come back here and how Mulan was being broken down and how Ruby was probably being broken down too.

And how Belle herself was getting torn up.

Gold knew what buttons to press. He found a weak spot when he brought up Papa and he was going to keep digging his fingers into that hollow spot like he did with her shoulders.

Belle wasn't sure how long she was going to be able to keep pushing back.

It was wrong to leave Mulan and Ruby and make a deal with the devil.

But it also didn't feel right to leave Papa alone and distressed. Not when she was all he had left.

As her tray was taken away and the lights were turned out, Belle released a groan, tempted once again to throw a tantrum and attack the walls or the door.

She knew that would help nobody and hurting herself wasn't going to change her situation.

Belle sighed and flopped back into bed, wishing she could at least be allowed to bathe. Her hair felt thick and greasy and she felt grimy. The hospital gown the other subjects wore was almost tempting over clothes she'd been stuck in for two? Three days? Maybe four? It was getting hard to keep track when everything just felt so dragging and monotonous.

As Belle tried to force herself to relax into her bed, she felt Aurora's presence start to take shape. _Belle. I'm here._

It was a relief to have someone to talk to who didn't have something they were trying to manipulate out of her.

 _Gold is a piece of shit._ That was Emma with her hard-edged energy and it was honestly a delight to have her in Belle's head again. There was a hint of amusement in Emma as she processed Belle's emotions. _Hah. I knew you'd miss me. I'm awesome._

 _Emma, please_. Aurora's worry was cutting through them and Belle had to admit she really missed the feeling of being so deeply connected with people. _Let's get working._

Pushing aside her urge to throw in more cocky quips, Emma focused her energy on spreading the mental link until they were able to connect with Mulan.

It was painful. They all felt how drained she was and how much her body throbbed with pain. She could barely see through her swollen eyes and could barely breathe through her nose. Propped up against the wall by her bed, Mulan had to keep her head upright to keep the blood from her nose from dripping back into her lungs. Dr. Hopper had given her an icepack but it was warm and useless now. They tended to send him over after a session to make sure she didn't die overnight when they still didn't have the answers they were looking for.

 _Hi_. Mulan felt sheepish as they read through and felt her experiences. _I'm hanging on. Don't worry about me._

But they were all worried about her.

 _I'm not dead yet._ Mulan tried to present a strong front but it fell flat when they could feel the pain and fear she was dealing with.

 _Should we include Ruby?_ Emma was just as worried about Mulan as everyone else but wanted to move attention away from her since it was clearly making her uncomfortable. That kind of attention wasn't something Mulan was used to and wasn't something she reveled in either. _Maybe Ruby will be more willing to talk now?_

 _We could try._ Belle did want to talk to Ruby after what happened. They hadn't seen each other since Belle was shocked and then dragged away. _Hopefully they hadn't been giving Ruby too hard of a time._

There was something of a glimmer or a shift in the air as Emma branched out the connection to try to reach Ruby several floors below. It was surreal, feeling Emma and Aurora go through the floors and into Ruby's room.

Upon sensing their presence, Ruby tensed up and clutched at the stuffed lion. She started pushing them away.

 _Ruby, please_. Belle tried to reach out through the hazy connection. _Are you okay? Have they hurt you again?_

There was a heaviness to Ruby that was different than before. She seemed to be fighting against it as she shifted at the feel of Belle. There was concern and confusion, wanting to know if Belle was alright, wanting to know if they were hurting Belle.

Then there was the distress at sensing Emma, Aurora and Mulan. She pushed them away and blocked them out.

Emma was the one to sever the connection before Belle could send Ruby some reassurance. _I think there's too many of us right now and she's overwhelmed. I have to figure out filtering us out so Ruby only senses one person at a time._

 _Could we try that later?_ After that glimpse at how worried Ruby was, as well as that heaviness to her, Belle didn't want to leave Ruby hanging.

 _Okay._ Emma wasn't confident yet, but she wanted to help. _We can give it a shot later._

 _For now I guess we could update you_. Aurora was starting to feel the strain that she and Emma were going through to maintain the multiple links. Belle realized they were probably still recovering from the escape. _Neal was able to upload some footage of Mulan's…_ Aurora faltered and they all felt how much it twisted at her heart to think about it. _…interrogation sessions with Dr. Gold._

 _I'm fine._ Mulan tried to assure Aurora but still failed to mask the pain from the injuries.

 _It's sparked an investigation and a shitstorm._ Emma picked up where Aurora left off. _They're doing their best to cover it up and downplay it though. A lot of news networks are making it seem like an accident, some are calling the reports a hoax. It's a mess._

The fact that some reports were trying to make it sound like an accident or a hoax made Belle sick to her stomach.

 _They've even been digging up receipts on Mulan._ Emma's anger rippled through the link. _They would talk about how she has a few fights on record in her high school. Some assholes are digging up Halloween pictures when she had a sword and shit and making it out like she's some crazy warfreak._

For a moment, anger boiled through Mulan at the injustice of the situation. Then it transitioned into concern for her brother. _They're not dragging Shang into this, are they? Would you know how he is?_

Aurora's been trying to find him but it's hard without knowing what his energy feels like. But we've been seeing some articles about him pushing for the investigation to dig deeper into the facility.

They all felt Mulan's guilt at getting her brother involved. She never wanted any trouble to come to him as a result of the risk she'd taken. Though she knew that helping the subjects was the right thing to do and that standing her ground and not giving anything away to Dr. Gold was the right thing to do, it still tore at her to know that her brother wasn't exempt from the whirlpool of chaos.

And Belle could relate to that.

 _How is Regina?_ Mulan was the one who wanted to change the subject and didn't want everyone feeling the distress she felt over her brother. _Aurora said she's been taking things hard._

It was Emma's turn to project her feelings of concern and distress over Regina.

 _Regina is… scared. She won't quite admit it, but she's scared her mother is going to find her. Doesn't help that Neal saw footage of Mrs. Mills going into the facility and talking to Gold about where Regina might be hiding_. They all felt Emma's connection to Regina and how they gave each other comfort and support. Emma sitting with Regina and keeping her calm and giving her reassurance and promising to stay by her side and not abandon her or isolate her. _Sometimes she just wants to hide, other times she wants to go out and confront her mother. We're trying to keep her fear from getting the best of her. She's tough, I don't doubt that. But the past few days have been really tough too._

As much as Emma was worried about Regina, there was still a great deal of respect for her. Belle liked that.

 _What's the plan?_ The throbbing pain she felt made Mulan question how well she would be able to participate in another escape attempt. _Our mission isn't over if Ruby and the Dunbrochs are still stuck here. Nevermind me. We want the rest to get out._

 _We are not_ neverminding _you_! Indignation ruffled through Aurora. _I can't truly relax until you're safe and out of that place._

 _Neal is still working on worming his way into the system, but he's almost sure he can override the cell doors_. Emma was vaguely amused by Aurora and Mulan's exchange but wanted to stay focused on getting the plan out to Belle and Mulan. _Ideally, he'd like to be able to deactivate their prods as well, but that takes a lot more energy and fine-tuning since the prods aren't connected to each other like the radios or the system is._

 _Maybe don't prioritize the prods then_. Belle would rather Neal keep his energies focused instead of spending too much time on every little detail. If they had enough time and room, they could get at the guards before they could draw their prods. They just needed a good plan and the element of surprise.

 _What happens once the doors are opened?_ Mulan asked. _Someone is going to have to go in for Ruby and Merida to get rid of their chains because they otherwise can't get out on their own._

 _I want to try again with Ruby._ Belle knew she had almost gotten through last time. If she just had another chance to talk to Ruby again, convince her again then maybe it could work. They almost had it. Belle just needed to make it work.

 _Were you really that close last time?_ Emma asked.

 _I think so._ Belle had seen the flicker in Ruby's eyes and had seen her thinking about it and wrestling with the decision of whether or not to go with Belle. _I was really close last time. If I can get another shot, I think I can convince her._

 _I can get Merida and the Dunbrochs._ There was a noticeable weight of guilt to Mulan as she volunteered to try again with the Dunbrochs. She hadn't forgiven herself for failing them, for not being able to safely get them out when they had been so close to the lobby entrance already. She hadn't forgiven herself for not being able to fight hard enough when the guards went at them. The failure hung heavily over her.

 _You should be resting, Mulan._ Aurora fretted over Mulan's injuries. _At the rate they're going, we're not even sure if you'll be capable of walking yourself out of the facility_. As the thought crossed her mind Aurora felt pangs of an ache to be with Mulan and take her pain away.

 _I'll go in._ Emma was capable of maintaining the link while moving. It would be tricky maintaining it while unlocking Merida's chains and talking to the Dunbrochs and also leading them out of the facility but she couldn't settle for leaving them trapped. There was a distinct feeling of anxiety at the thought of walking back into the facility and risking everything. _I want to help._

 _I'll go with you._ Regina's presence joined them out of nowhere but Belle was glad to hear that voice again. _It's both of us or none of us._

 _You sure, babe?_ Emma had interlaced her fingers with Regina's.

Wait, were Regina and Emma a couple? Belle had known they were close and shared a strong connection but hadn't quite been sure if their connection had wandered over into romantic depths. Not that it was too much of a surprise since it did make sense. But it was still just a little surprising.

 _Belle, seriously?_ Emma was annoyed, but playfully so. And for a moment, it felt refreshing to be like this. Gossiping and joking about who was dating who. It felt like such a stupidly mundane conversation and Belle appreciated it. _Don't tell me you didn't know about Aurora and Mulan either._

 _Aurora and Mulan?_ _Since when?_ Belle noticed they had a connection too and seemed to talk among themselves a lot but Belle thought they just deeply shared the solidarity that came with their planning and preparation.

 _We're not.. Exactly…_ Aurora was physically blushing while her emotions were fluttering all over the place.

 _We were working our way up to it_. Despite her pain, Mulan managed to feel giddiness and embarrassment that mirrored Aurora's.

Belle was still shocked.

 _But you're both so into each other._ Emma seemed just as shocked, but for different reasons. _How have you not officially become a thing yet? Wait seriously you haven't even kissed yet? I mean come on, if Regina and I were in different circumstances I'd have aggressively made out with her ages ago._

 _Emma, don't go into detail about that._ Regina was embarrassed now too.

 _Can we just get back on track?_ Aurora's discomfort was radiating from her in waves. _So Neal will short circuit the doors to all open. Belle should be able to make her way out on her own. Emma and Regina will go and get the Dunbroch family. I want to go in to help Mulan out._

 _No, I'll be fine_. As much as Mulan appreciated the offer, she didn't want Aurora risking herself when Dr. Gold was already furious with her and itching to get his hands on her. It wasn't worth the possible danger Aurora could end up in if they failed again. _I don't want to end up being the reason you turn out to be his new favorite toy._

 _I'll go to you then._ Regina volunteered. _If you need help getting to the lobby, I want to be there for you_. There was clearly a great deal of fear Regina held at going back to the facility and even being on a different floor than Emma, but she wanted to do it despite that. She wanted to help Mulan after the small kindnesses Mulan had offered during Regina's sessions of testing.

 _You don't have to._ Mulan was uncomfortable with all the attention and concern for her and didn't know how to respond to it. There was a part of her that didn't want to be a burden but also didn't want to be rude by outright declining the offer.

And there was a part of her that knew she might indeed need help getting out, especially if the beatings got bad enough to keep Mulan from walking properly. And she feared that wasn't far off.

 _We're not leaving anyone behind this time._ Emma's energy was firm and decisive. _You two risked a lot to get us out and we owe you as much to do the same._

* * *

The invasion has been bothersome and the subject hadn't liked the multiple presences in her head.

But it also really bothered her to feel Mulan's presence.

It was difficult to figure out what she felt about Mulan. There had almost been an urge to lash out at her and blame her for how the subject was being treated now and the tests they were putting her through now.

That urge was all wrong. The subject didn't want to lash out at Mulan. Didn't need to lash out at Mulan.

She just didn't want to have anything to do with them, even if she did desperately wish to connect with Belle and find out how she was doing and if she was safe. Nobody was willing to give her an answer and she was starting to wonder if they understood the word she tried to speak.

Belle was really her name, right?

 _Ruby_. The soft, soothing blue of energy lay over the subject. There was still the vague feeling of there being others as well but they were muted and dull and Belle seemed to be the focus. _It's me. Belle. Can we talk?_

They couldn't talk. They shouldn't talk. The subject couldn't let them get too close to her.

But she desperately needed to know if Belle was okay. If she was safe. If she was back home where she was supposed to be.

 _I'm being kept in one of the rooms of the B2 level_. Belle expressed her empathy with how the subject dug her nails into her hands, shared the frustration and lack of control she felt now. _They haven't exactly started hurting me yet… but I'm scared that they might start when Gold begins to really lose his patience with me._

They wouldn't hurt Belle! They _shouldn't_. It wasn't right. The only monster who truly deserved pain and punishment was the subject. She killed people and injured people and traumatized people. There was little more dangerous than the subject and it was best for her to stay here.

 _Ruby, no_. Belle's patience felt like a blanket on the subject's shoulders. _You have more control over yourself than you ever did before. You have all these cards stacked against you and still you try so hard to keep yourself from losing the fight. You know the danger you have the potential to be and you take all these precautions that I don't think anyone would ever bother to take._

This wasn't something the subject wanted to think about. She belonged here, in this facility. There was no place for her outside.

 _I want to take you away from here._ Belle continued to share strong feelings of comfort and care. _You deserve to heal from what happened and what you're going through now._

The subject felt like she didn't deserve to heal and didn't deserve to have anyone care about her. Nobody should care about her and nobody should be trying to get her out of this place and release her into a world where so many innocent lives could be taken away all over again.

_You and I won't let that happen again. You're capable of not letting that happen again. Me and Emma and Aurora and Regina and Mulan, we'll all help you._

This was too much. The subject pressed the lion plush against her face and closed her eyes, trying to push back Belle's voice and get away from it. She didn't know what to think. Everyone was telling her different things.

The scientists were telling her she was dangerous and Mulan had taken dangerous risks. They were right about that. Belle and the others were saying she could control it and she wouldn't be the danger outside that she was sure she would be.

Everything was too confusing and too overwhelming and she wanted to get away from it all.

There was a feeling of regret in the air as Belle and her friends severed the connection.

* * *

The Storybrooke Park was nice at night. It was quiet and deserted, which was nice after a long day of cranky teachers, noisy classmates and loud customers. Mother said she would be out tonight and that meant that being outside of the house without getting caught was just a little bit easier. The trick was to get back home before Mother did.

It wasn't going to be a long time out. There were just some days that felt overwhelming and she needed to get some air.

The sound of a bicycle reached her ears and she hoped whoever was out biking at this time wasn't going to take their route to the park. It would ruin the peace and quiet.

Not that she should be policing the park to start with.

She just liked when it was quiet. It wasn't overwhelming her senses like some days did.

The cyclist dismounted and drew nearer. A distinct silhouette with thick curly hair came into view. As she got closer, it was easy to see Merida's red hair and dark green hoodie.

"Mind if I join you?"

After they're little talk in the school hallway, she had been more conscious of how she behaved, treating Merida better and fighting back the stupid little feelings of jealousy and resentment. Merida made Dorothy happy and if anything, that was the thought to hang on to.

"Go ahead." She wanted to be alone tonight, but maybe they could be alone together.

"Came 'ere to think for a bit." Merida took her place on the other swing, scuffing her sneakers in the dirt. "Looks like you did too."

"Yeah…" She sighed, grasping at the chains of the swing and leaning back. "It's tiring sometimes. Just dealing with everything that happens."

"Aye, that sounds about right." With her feet planted in the sand, Merida lazily moved the sing back and forth. "I wonder sometimes what it'd be like to be in control of my own fate."

"Same." After letting a moment of quiet pass between them, she spoke. "Wanna trade? What's on my mind for what's on your mind?"

Continuing to swing herself with her feet still on the ground, Merida didn't answer right away, seeming to be thinking over the offer. "Okay."

They were quiet again, not quite sure who should go first.

It was Merida who broke the silence this time. "Remember how I said Mum is checked in at a facility? For her condition?"

She nodded.

"My brothers and I carry the gene too." Merida stopped swinging and leaned her head against the chain. "They said it's dormant, but it's there."

"Does Dorothy know?"

Merida sighed a breath that hung in the cool night air. "I haven't figured out yet how to tell her."

In the year or so that she got to know Merida, her mother's condition had never really been explained. "Is it like... fatal?"

Furrowing her brow, Merida looked down at her shoes. "It's... not exactly fatal... but if that switch gets flipped on... it'll change my life and my brothers' lives in major ways."

Maybe this wasn't quite the appropriate time to ask for more clarification when Merida was always so secretive and evasive about her family problem. But it was worth a try anyway. "What do you mean?"

Something of a smile tugged at one of the corners of Merida's lips. "Our bodies will be affected, our moods would probably also be affected… _Everything_ , really." The bitter smile left Merida's face, replaced by a clenched jaw as she looked out into the emptiness of the park. "I really hope that part in us doesn't ever get activated."

"Yeah…" She didn't understand what exactly the condition was, but she could understand feeling out of control, at the mercy of whatever was going on with her family and with her body. "Hopefully it doesn't get worse."

"And you?" Merida turned to meet her eyes. "What's troubling your head?"

It was hard, feeling like keeping the problems deeply buried and also feeling like just spilling it all out. Keeping it in might be easier, but at this point it was hard to say how much longer she could do that. Some days she felt like she just wanted to explode. Especially on Headache Weeks.

Sharing everything though… would be hard. A lot of times, she herself wasn't sure what that _everything_ was.

"It's been getting pretty rough at home." She settled for sharing just enough to lighten the load on her chest. "Sometimes I wish I could just… run away. Be away from her." Pushing against the sand with her foot, she swayed herself in slow circles. "I like thinking sometimes about leaving with Peter."

Merida raised an eyebrow. "Running away is easier said than done, isn't it?"

"Yeah." She sighed, "It's just… sometimes I feel like I just need to be somewhere else. Y'know?"

Huffing, Merida turned to give her a look. "You're asking me that? 'Course I think a lot about going home."

"Would you? If you could?"

There was no immediate answer to that question. Merida let go of the swing's chain and put her forearms across her knees, leaning on them and letting her head hang down. "I don't know." She sighed then looked forward. "I'd rather not leave Dorothy."

"Kansas would hunt you down if you tried to run out on her." Unable to keep herself from smirking at the thought, she added, "I'd probably join her."

Merida laughed and they let the moment between them feel light and playful. It felt good to just relax and let the amusement take its hold. The feeling wasn't an intense joy, but just light enough to break the monotony of the heaviness.

As the silence stretched back into stillness, Merida spoke, "What's goin' on at home? I mean, if it's okay to ask."

"I dunno… it's just… tense. And cold." She didn't really know what was going on. It always just felt wrong. And Mother always just found something to criticize. When Granny left, it was like she brought the warmth with her. "It wasn't always like this. It was different when Granny was still staying with us."

"Ah…"

"You heard the rumors, haven't you?"

Merida nodded. "They still go around sometimes. And Dorothy told me you don't remember much about when she was arrested."

"Yeah." She felt herself getting tense and warm as her eyes started to burn up. "It was different. The house was different." She sniffed, wiped at her nose. "The basement was different. Doing the doctor thing was different."

"The doctor thing?"

Shit.

Had she said that out loud?

 _Shit_.

"Nothing." She shook her head, stumbling out of the swing and wringing her hands. "Just some… just." She fidgeted with her hair. "Just stupid stuff." Put her hands in her pockets and hunched her shoulders. "Mother does stuff to help with the headaches. It's nothing."

The look on Merida's face was strange as she stood up and came closer. It was a furrowed brow and pained eyes, like she was concerned and suspicious at the same time. Or something. "What does she do to you in the basement?"

"It's nothing." She didn't like where this was going. "Nothing like… _weird_. Just… It's nothing. I don't want to talk about this."

"Ruby, wait-"

"Just forget I said anything." Not even Dorothy knew much about the basement stuff. As far as she and Peter were concerned, it was just calming music and herbal stuff in the basement that helped with the headaches. "I have to get home."

It was about time she left anyway. Mother might be home any minute now and she would not be pleased to find out her daughter had snuck out.

* * *

The headaches were becoming more intense. She'd put aside the lion plush in favor if clenching her fists and pressing them against her forehead. The short hair covering her head had started growing long enough for her to clutch at the strands but after they gave her a fresh cut, it was hard to grab at anything again.

Through the haze of pain, she could barely cooperate when Gaston and the guards escorted her out of her room. Her stumbling and thrashing and whining agitated them and earned her at least one shock from the prod. When the headache bout finally passed, she was dazed to find herself in a room, even more dazed when the guards removed her chains and left her without any restraints.

If this was wolfstime, and she was pretty sure it was, leaving her without restraints was a bad idea. She looked around, hoping this wasn't going to be a session with Belle. This was the worst time for a no-chains session with Belle.

When the door opened, the subject pressed herself against the far wall.

But when they practically threw someone in, the subject was surprised and confused. Until the scent registered as Mulan and the subject could almost imagine shocks of electricity going through her.

Mulan made her angry.

Right?

A part of the subject was angry at Mulan for the painful set of sessions the subject had been going through lately. Angry at Mulan for breaking the rules and putting the facility in danger and treating the subject with too much softness.

But how could the subject be angry at Mulan when she was in that condition? Her face was marred with bruises and cuts, her normally neatly tied hair was hanging limply, several strands sticking out messily. There looked to be a few splints on her fingers and she was favoring her left leg.

Still, she managed to straighten up and stand tall. Even without the uniform, standing only in the undershirt and pants, barefoot and battered, Mulan stood with her shoulders squared and her chin up. She looked directly at the camera at the corner of the room.

"You're going to get what's coming to you some day, Gold. You can destroy our bodies and screw with our minds all you want." Mulan spat out blood and grit her teeth, continuing to glare at the camera. "It's going to come out in the open eventually. Then you'll be the one who's in deep shit."

Electric shocks jolted through the subject, coming from her collar and cuffs. The subject collapsed to the ground, muscles jerking and spasming. It was painful and overwhelming.

And when it stopped, she was agitated and Mulan was crouching over her.

The subject growled, hating how Mulan was once again showing concern the subject didn't need. Why couldn't she just be left alone? Why did they keep having to push her old life back at her? Why did they keep insisting on showing her kindness and concern?

She was a monster.

Mulan was ignoring the warning growls, moving even closer. "Ruby, are you alright?"

Scrambling to her feet and moving past Mulan, the subject paced the other side of the room, fists clenched, shoulders tensed. The anger was there. It was burning and it wanted to lash out and attack the nearest thing and that was conveniently the one person they'd been constantly telling her to hate.

But it was hard to hate Mulan when she was the nice guard.

But that was the point wasn't it? She wasn't supposed to be a nice guard. She was supposed to be firm and fierce like the other guards. She was supposed to follow the rules.

Another growl rumbled in the subject's throat as she turned her eyes on Mulan.

"Ruby…" Mulan seemed to sense that something was wrong. She moved slowly as she stood up and brought her hands in front of her. "Ruby, please. You can control this. You're stronger than they think you are."

With her eyes warming up and her jaw growing tense and her gums starting to be split by more teeth, the subject knew that she wasn't strong enough to fight the change. She was angry and Mulan was right there. Belle was wrong. The subject wasn't good at controlling the wolf. The wolf was good at controlling the subject.

Maybe the scientists would stop shocking the subject if she attacked Mulan like they clearly wanted her to. Maybe it would feel good to tear into something again just like before.

"Ruby, please." Mulan was starting to look genuinely afraid as the subject's steps brought her closer and closer. "Ruby, I'm not the enemy here. They've been hurting you for years. I remember you from school. You were one of those loud kids always laughing with her friends at your cafeteria table, remember?"

The memory was vague, but the subject recalled sitting in the cafeteria with Dorothy and having a blast with her and checking out girls with her.

"Ruby Lucas isn't dead." Mulan said, "She's still in there somewhere. She's been fighting to control the wolf for years. You're more than just Subject 204."

No. Subject 204 was all she was and all she was ever going to be.

They were wrong.

The subject pounced only to slam into the wall as Mulan dived away.

"Ruby, please." On the floor, Mulan looked so much smaller as she pulled herself backwards. "Ruby, please don't do this. It's not who you are."

At the sight of Mulan looking so small and broken, the subject felt disgusted with herself. What was she doing? Why was she attacking someone who didn't stand a chance? Why was she being like this?

The subject felt like her head was tearing itself apart. Agony brought her to her knees as she felt her bones starting to bend and break into place. Sharp teeth were breaking through her gums and her shoulders were popping in and out of place.

This was bad.

She couldn't leave the wolf alone with Mulan.

With what little control she still had over her shifting body, the subject through herself at the door with a resounding bang that dented the heavy material. Burning pain was working its way through her bones as she felt her nose breaking itself forward. Her limbs were barely in her control but she threw herself at the door another time, further denting it and even starting to crack it.

Then that sound came.

That sound that made her ears hurt and made her head hurt and she wailed as the pain overwhelmed her before she felt a needle pierce her skin and guards' hands were all over her and dragging her away.

* * *

"What were you trying to prove just then?" Belle demanded, almost wishing she had her hands free so she could shove them or knock their heads together. She felt angry and she hated it. She hated _them_. "What just happened back there? Don't you see that proves just how hard Ruby fights to keep herself from being a monster?"

"Dearie, watch yourself." Dr. Gold's tone was a warning but Belle didn't want to have anything to do with it.

She took a step towards him, hating every part of him from his stupid (lack of a) haircut to his neat dark tie to his pointed shoes to his twisted view of the world and to his rabid obsession with control to his severe lack of empty to his unforgivable disregard for humane treatment.

"Ruby's fighting so hard not to be a monster and all you people do is provoke her into being one! I saw you push a button to shock her when she didn't lash out at Mulan." Belle brought her face up close to Dr. Gold's stiff one. "You've been working so damn hard to destroy her and turn her into something you can use but guess what? You failed! She won't let herself hurt anyone! She'll destroy herself before destroying anyone again and you're blind for not being able to-"

It happened so fast Belle had barely been able to process it. Dr. Gold's hand had come up and hit her in the face. The strike had been a slap but it had been hard enough to send Belle staggering to the side, just barely managing to catch herself.

"That's enough, Belle." Dr. Gold spoke with the stern tone of someone frustrated with a child and it felt demeaning and infuriating. "Have her taken back to her room."

"Mulan's right, you know." Belle called after Dr. Gold as the guards started to pull her away. "This is going to get out eventually and you'll be in deep shit."

Ignoring her, Dr. Gold spoke to Tamara and Dr. Whale. "Looks like you were right, Whale. Maybe we should try Plan B."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure y'all already have some idea of what Plan B might look like. Also I'm not sure yet when I can update because this'll be a bit of a busy weekend again and I'm also still trying to figure out my outline for the next chapter so we'll see how things go.
> 
> In the meantime I got my gurl Leticia working on a little something something which I hope to link to next chapter.
> 
>  [ALSO LOOK KONAKO DID A THING AGAIN](http://konako.tumblr.com/post/160858597306)
> 
>   
> 


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get really nasty in this chapter, so have your hot chocolate and kitten pictures at the ready.

Pacing her room with heavy stomps, Belle didn't know how else to work through her rage. She felt restless and pent up, full of energy even if the darkness of the lights being off was supposed to help her body settle enough to sleep.

Hopefully Neal had gotten footage of what they'd been doing to Mulan and to Ruby and even to Merida and all the other subjects.

But after what they said about media twisting Mulan out of favor, Belle feared how more footage would be perceived. The sight of Ruby lunging for Mulan and starting to shift was probably going to look very bad on her and a considerable amount of people would probably push for more security and restraint on Ruby.

Which was the last thing anyone needed right now.

"FUUUUCK!" Belle screamed out the word, slamming her palm against the door. She hated feeling this helpless, forced to just watch as Gold tried to pit Ruby against Mulan. Forced to watch Ruby being sedated and subdued. Forced to watch Mulan trying to fight off guards overpowering her. Forced to be cooperative during transport. Forced to be alone with Gold and his bony hands and smug smile.

Belle slammed her palms against the door several more times, punctuating each hit with a yell, "FUCK. FUCK. _FUUUUCK_."

Aurora and Emma didn't say anything about being ready to try Escape Attempt 2.0 just yet, but Belle wished it could be done soon. She didn't know how much more of Gold's bullshit she could take. If her hands weren't cuffed during their sessions together, Belle didn't know if she would actually be trying to hit him already.

She almost wanted to.

That scared her.

But what also scared her was how Gold was starting to get physical with her, from the threatening shoulder thing to the outright slap tonight. How long before they start beating her like they did with Mulan?

Belle wasn't sure if she had the strength to keep the plans private while Gaston and Gold and the guards used her as a punching bag. Just thinking about it made her knees weak.

She slid to the floor and stared up at the ceiling, wishing to hear from Aurora again but doubting that a meeting would take place tonight since they would most likely be preparing to get supplies and vehicles for the new plan.

* * *

The beeping of the machines was the first thing she heard as she started to slip back into consciousness. That was followed by the voices of the scientists talking amongst themselves.

"I would have preferred if we spent more time conditioning her." That was Dr. Gold's voice. "But we don't have much of that. We have to get rid of Li."

"What about Belle?" Dr. Whale asked the question. "Shouldn't we be figuring out what to do with her too?"

"I need to think over that." Dr. Gold said, "I think I'm getting close to getting her to crack. She still hasn't heard from her father and it won't be long until she breaks."

"If you say so." Dr. Whale's voice sounded doubtful.

Familiar bony hands touched her forehead and slid down to the top of her head, running fingers through the short strands. "204, are you awake?"

The subject opened her eyes and looked up to see Dr. Gold standing over her while Dr. Whale was off to the side checking on the equipment.

"Did you sleep well, 204?"

Averting her eyes, the subject wasn't sure how to answer that.

"You should know, dearie." Dr. Gold continued to toy with her hair but when she still wouldn't look at him, he put a hand under her jaw and turned her head to face him. "We're _disappointed_ in you."

That's all she was, wasn't she? A disappointment to everyone.

At the end of the day though, they couldn't be as disappointed with her as she was with herself.

"You had the perfect opportunity to confront someone who broke our rules." Dr. Gold kept his grip on her face, making it hard for her to look away when she wished she could just get out of here and be alone in her room. Instead she was strapped down to the bed and forced to look at Dr. Gold. "Instead you just ran away from her and destroyed our property."

She hadn't meant to destroy the door… she was scared and panicking and didn't want to hurt Mulan.

It almost sounded like they _wanted_ her to hurt Mulan.

Dr. Gold finally let go of her face, but the relief that came with that was brief, painfully interrupted by the piercing sound driving needles into her ears and nails into her skull.

As the pain escalated into sharp, stabbing agony, she let out a wail, struggling against the straps, cuffs and collar keeping her locked down on the bed. It was like her eardrums were going to burst and her head was going to melt into mush.

It kept going on and on and on.

Her body was tensing up while she still tried throwing her head back and forth.

The pain was blinding.

Maddening.

She would rather feel the electricity or the cuts than this. Driving her head back against the bed, she jerked at her cuffs even if her wrists burned and bled.

 _Please, just smash my head in and put an end to this._ She thought about how that would be so much better than this sharp, piercing torture.

Finally, the sound stopped and she lay her head back, breathing heavily as her tensed body suddenly became limp. She felt sweaty and drained and very lightheaded. There was a wet feeling in her ears that dripped down her neck.

They were bleeding and painful.

She felt warmth building up in her eardrums as her healing started to fix whatever damage the sound had done.

There was a moment where she couldn't hear anything. Not even the beep of the machines or Dr. Gold and Dr. Whale's footsteps as they walked away, not their voices as they probably continued to talk about how badly she failed.

It felt like ages when she could finally hear the beeping machines again.

In the months - _years_ \- she'd spent here, the subject had never felt so lost and confused. She was doing her best to please the scientists but it felt like it was just never enough. She was tired. It was still undeniable truth that she deserved the treatment they gave her, the pain they put her through, the isolation they put her into, the tests they challenged her with. A killer like her shouldn't have any less being done to them.

But she couldn't help but think about Belle and what she said.

The subject tried so hard to maintain control no matter how much the scientists challenged her and pushed her and pulled her towards the wolf. There were times that she knew that the line between herself and the wolf was blurred. Times when she felt more animal than human. And almost all the time, she didn't truly feel like she was human.

And yet it had been a very long time since she last shifted outside of the full moon. It happened a lot at first, during her first few days (weeks? _Months_?) in the facility. They would expose her to things or trigger her emotions and she would find herself shifting and lashing out.

Then she got better at fighting it. At recognizing the symptoms and the signs. Her eyes were always the first to change. Her claws were always the hardest to retract.

She was sure that the tests were to get her to be better at controlling the wolf.

She was sure of that.

Wasn't she?

She wasn't.

* * *

It was like she only just barely got to close her eyes before the lights came on and the guards came in.

Tired and groggy, Belle tried to focus her mind on staying strong and alert as the guards escorted her to a room just past the one with the door Ruby had damaged.

And as Gold strolled in, Belle felt her hate spike at how confident and at ease he looked. Maybe he was doing a very good job of hiding his frustration with the losses he was incurring from his failed tests with Ruby and the damage control he had to do to counter Neal releasing data and footage.

Maybe he was mad and didnt realize how much of a mess he had on his hands.

Maybe he had a really good damage control team undoing all of Neal's work. He could be in a good mood because he was winning on the outside.

"Good morning, dearie." Gold greeted her with a smile that showed off his stupid gold teeth. "You don't look like you slept very well."

As much as she wanted to respond with a jab of some sort, she didn't know what to say. She chose to just look at him without a word.

Upon realizing that he wasn't going to be getting a reply, Gold's smile faded. "Why do you insist on making everything so difficult?"

"Why don't you just make things simple then." She threw his words back at him. "Let us go. Just release us."

Gold scoffed. "Us? Are you still insistent on having a beast like 204 released into the world? She's a danger to herself and to everyone around her. Didn't you see what she did to my door?"

"All I saw was someone trying her damn hardest not to be a monster while her captors constantly provoked her into being one." Belle curled her lip, "She's been fighting a battle for humanity ever since she set foot in here."

"Really now, dearie." Dr. Gold tried to interrupt, "That's just-"

"And you know what?" Belle leaned forward in her seat. "I think she's finally _winning_."

Gold's jaw was clenching and unclenching while his fingers rapped against the table.

They both didnt speak for a while, just glared at each other, quietly challenging the other to back down.

"You're not as in control of her as you think you are." Belle found herself being the one to speak first. She felt so angry with him she wanted to throw what blows she could. "Some day she's going to snap. And when she does, you wont stand a chance."

"We're prepared for that." Gold said, "We have _always_ been prepared for that."

It was hard not to think down a path of dark and twisted methods they might be ready to use if Ruby behaved too far outside of their expectations. Belle felt her stomach twist at the memory of Gold shocking the wolf into submission and cutting her face as punishment.

"Why are you still so fixated on her?" Gold asked, reaching into something in his pocket. "Especially when more important people should appropriately be on your mind?"

Belle was surprised to see her phone in Gold's hand and the smile tugging at his lips showed he had noticed. "It's been nearly a week since you last saw this, hasn't it?" He waved it side to side like a child taunting another with a toy.

Jerking forward rattled the cuffs but kept her locked to her chair. "Give that back."

"What's the passcode?" Gold asked, the smile on his face growing wider, flashing his teeth.

Belle glared at him

The way Gold chuckled just added to Belle's irritation. "Not that we still need it." He swiped the screen and started using her phone. "I just thought I'd give you another chance to cooperate, dearie."

Seeing him go through her phone with such ease infuriated Belle to a degree that surprised her.

"In your messages, we've got several concerned texts from your father." Gold continued, "Some ' _Belle, where are you_?' and 'Y _ou're still with Aurora, right? Please let me know if you're coming home for tonight._ '"

The mocking way he read the messages made Belle want to launch herself over the table and take the phone away from him but the cuffs kept her in place and she already felt her wrists bruising as she strained against them.

"We've got also this lovely one, ' _Belle, I'm hearing news about a break-in at Bealfire and how three of their creatures escaped. I don't know how this is connected to you but I'm getting worried. Please get back to me soon_.'"

"Shut up!" Belle strained against the cuffs, yelling at the top of her lungs and feeling her face flush. "STOP IT!"

Gold looked at Belle with a raised eyebrow. "Would you rather listen to him yourself, then? There are a few voice messages as well. Would you like to hear one?"

Listening to Gold read messages was one thing, but hearing Papa's voice was something else entirely and Belle felt something in herself shatter.

" _Belle… I don't know what's going on. I'm so worried_." There was a shakiness to his voice, and he seemed to take a deep breath to steady himself. " _This news I've been hearing about Aurora and how she led the attack on the facility… does that have anything to do with you_?"

There was a hint of disbelief in his tone, and she could imagine him rubbing the bridge of his nose and leaning against the dining table.

 _"And I'm seeing news about Mulan as well and how she wants to free the beasts in Baelfire and have them attack everyone… I don't know what to believe._ "

Hearing more about the smear campaign against Mulan sent a fresh wave of anger through Belle.

" _Were you involved in this? Did they force you to join their gang or… or were you willingly part of it_?" From the sound of it, Papa was hoping that Belle wasn't involved, wishing that Belle was just somewhere else and had nothing to do with anything going on. " _I know you once told me that you didn't quite agree with their methods. But this? Being part of some rogue group attacking the facility? Please tell me you're not part of that_."

Belle felt crushed knowing that her father would rather she just sit back and watch Baelfire torture its captives. She felt crushed hearing how Papa saw them as a rogue group committing crimes against Baelfire. She felt crushed knowing that he saw the group as criminals and wished his daughter was above that.

" _Please, Belle… just… answer._ " The judgement was gone from his voice as he slipped into his despair. _"I don't know what to think anymore. I don't know what's going on with you or where you are…_ " There was a muffled sob. " _I can't lose you too, Belle. Please._ " His voice got shaky and difficult to understand but Belle caught what he was saying before he ended the recording. " _I need you._ "

It was hard to hide the quiver to lip and it was especially hard to hide the warm, tingly feeling in her eyes that told her she was tearing up.

Belle didn't trust herself to be able to speak with an even voice or glare at Gold with cold eyes. She looked off to the side and to the floor, biting her lip to still it.

"Is 204 and this irrational obsession with being in here with her really worth the torment you're putting your father through?"

Furrowing her brow and scrunching up her eyes, Belle hated the tears that worked their way down her cheeks. She breathed in deeply then let it out in a slow and shaky exhale.

"Would you want to change your mind now or think it over for another day?"

Was she really going to leave Papa in the dark like that? All for some girl who didn't even want to save herself?

Belle knew the answer.

It was hard but she had to find strength in her conviction that standing up for Ruby was the right thing to do. She was a person deprived of humanity and agency and if she couldn't stand up for herself then someone else had to.

And it had been working.

There wasn't an easy way to tell, but Belle could feel it.

Ruby was more human than any of the scientists in this wretched place and she deserved to remember who she was and the good that she was capable of. That night with Mulan and the urgency with which Ruby tried to avoid hurting her was proof enough that the monstrosity the facility accused Ruby of wasn't as set in stone as they believed.

She had more control over herself than she or Gold or any of the others realized. And she didn't want to be a monster. She wanted to do good and be good.

That counted for something.

Still feeling her cheeks damp with tears, Belle blinked and steadied herself before turning her head to face Gold. As she spoke, Belle hid her own surprise at how steady her words sounded. "I am not leaving here without Ruby."

"You're in for a treat today then, dearie." Though the frustration could be felt through the stiffness of his smile, Gold kept his tone light and teasing before addressing the guards. "Take her back to her room."

* * *

Wolfstime always made her hungry, and right now, she felt like her stomach was clawing itself from the inside out. The sharp pangs made her want to curl up into herself but the straps still kept her lying flat on the bed.

Sometimes they kept her on the bed until it was almost time to shift again.

This could be one of those times.

But when a team of guards and assistants came into the room and started hooking chains to her collar, she wasn't sure if it could really be afternoon already. They removed the strap across her shoulders and waist so she could sit up, then her cuffs were next, unhooked from the bed before being linked to each other behind her back. From there, they removed the straps on her legs and warily watched her shuffle out of the bed.

Once both her feet were on the ground, they tugged at the chains and led her out of the room and down the hall, past several doors and through the elevator.

The destination was a relatively empty room with one wall of glass. Several guards held her chains while assistants pulled up her gown so they could put the heart monitor over her ribs. They surprisingly didn't put the scanners on her head.

"Greetings, 204." The speakers projected Dr. Gold's voice just as the glass wall lit up and showed the control room with its monitors and machinery and Dr. Gold himself standing by the wall.

What drew the subject's attention though wasn't the scientists manning the controls but the two chairs and the people strapped to them. There was Belle. She didn't look to be physically hurt but there was fear in her eyes.

And Mulan. She didn't look any better than she did last night. Bruises covering her skin, eyes and lips swollen.

A growl rumbled in the subject's throat. She started to move towards the glass but the guards pulled her back and before she could brace herself, the sound came again, piercing her ears and her skull with nails and needles and pins. She wanted to slam her head against the floor to make it stop but the guards piling on top of her kept her head pressed down and she didn't want to thrash too much and hurt them.

But the agony was intense and she was afraid of going deaf again.

* * *

"Please, stop it!" Belle begged, uselessly straining against the straps keeping her on the chair. "Don't hurt her!"

It seemed like an eternity before Gold finally moved his fingers away from the button that was hurting Ruby with what Gold explained was a sound with a frequency only creatures like herself could pick up.

When what she was hearing finally stopped, Ruby visibly went limp. The heavy rise and fall to her chest showed her struggle to breathe evenly as the guards started to move off of her.

With slow, deliberate steps, Gold moved to stand in front of Belle. "Are you ready to tell me more about your accomplices? About Neal perhaps?"

Taking a moment to glance to the side at Mulan's battered face and across to Ruby's limp form, Belle wasn't sure how she could stay strong and quiet. This morning's session with the voicemail from Papa had already knocked her down. Now, having to be witness to more torture for Ruby? Maybe even Mulan?

Belle was terrified and sick to her stomach.

"We've seen messages on your phone of him requesting external drives." Gold said, "And some correspondence with Aurora about perceived repercussions if this Neal uploads data from my facility."

Though she wasn't sure if she was imagining it or not, Belle thought she could feel Mulan's eyes boring into her and silently asking why Belle didn't delete her messages.

And she felt stupid for it.

But she did recall only putting in Neal and Killian's first names and she also didn't keep any pictures of them. Hopefully that would buy enough time for the team on the outside to keep from getting caught. _Hopefully_.

"What exactly can he do?" Dr. Gold asked, "He sounds to be more of a technokinetic than a typical hacker and I want to know where he's hiding, what he can do and what his next move is going to be."

With a shake of her head, Belle looked away from him.

"Belle!" Gold snapped her name, demanding her attention and even if she flinched at the raised voice, she kept her gaze averted.

When he didn't get the attention he wanted, Gold reached over and grabbed a handful of Belle's hair, tightly pulling until her scalp hurt and forcefully turning her head until she was facing him. "You're playing a game that you are not going to win, dearie."

Even if she was scared and was already imagining the cruel and painful things he had planned for the three of them, Belle managed to keep her voice calm as she said, "I'd like to say the same for you."

"We'll see about that." Gold let go of Belle's hair and walked to Mulan, who straightened up at his approach, holding her head high. "I don't know how you two found yourselves working together against a company that so generously provided the opportunity of a lifetime to you."

Mulan didn't grace Gold with a response, which seemed to frustrate him.

Then Belle noticed that as Gold walked in a circle around Mulan, he was bringing something out from under his labcoat.

Just as Belle recognized the custom silver blade, Gold struck, driving the knife through the back of Mulan's hand and into the armrest her wrist was strapped to. The scream that tore out of her was painful and heart-wrenching.

Mulan was breathing heavily and throwing her head back, sweat dripping down her face, teeth chattering.

"You still think we're playing games, dearies?" Gold moved away from Mulan and walked over to the glass wall.

Looking around, Belle saw that Whale looked disgusted but didn't protest. A few of the assistants looked disturbed but turned to focus their attention on their computers.

They were trapped and helpless and Belle felt like throwing up at the sight of the knife gruesomely sticking into Mulan's hand. Her rapid breaths were now through gritted teeth as she tried to stay in control of herself.

"We have a treat prepared for this afternoon and since I can't seem to give you two enough of an incentive to cooperate, a change in tactic is in order."

* * *

Through the haze of healing enough to regain her hearing, the subject realized her hands weren't locked behind her back and the guards were pulling her to her feet. She looked towards the glass wall and saw that Belle was saying something and struggling in her chair. Mulan was hunched over as much as the restraints would allow, and that's when the subject noticed a knife buried into Mulan's hand.

Not sure if the sight was real or some sort of test or projection, the subject could only stare and struggle to voice her confusion, but the words just caught in her throat like they always did.

Before the subject could try to understand what was happening in there, the doors on the opposite side of her room opened to three guards pulling someone in. At first, the subject was confused by how they were treating the person just like they did the subject. They were roughly handling her and moving her into position a few meters from the subject. She was wearing a similar pale gown and closely cropped red hair.

As the person's blue eyes focused on the subject, she felt her stomach churn and her legs wobbled.

" _Ruby_." Merida growled the name, flashing unusually sharp teeth as she strained against the guards holding the chains hooked to her collar.

"204 and 206, I believe you two have met before." Dr. Gold's voice filled the room as he spoke through the speakers. "And I have a proposal for you."

Snarls rumbled from Merida as she kept her eyes focused on the subject.

"It's been up for debate in the meeting rooms which of you is stronger." Dr. Gold continued, "Now, we've decided to see if we can set the record straight on who could defeat who in a fight."

Merida struggled against the guards holding her back. Several more came into the room to pull back on her chains. Her blue eyes were starting to warm to a more amber color and her fingertips extended into claws that were noticeably much longer than the subject's.

"Your vitals will be monitored of course. We would still rather not want one of you _dead_." As Dr. Gold said this, Merida turned to look towards the glass wall. "Still, we want to make things interesting. The winner of the fight earns the privilege of negotiating a deal with me."

For the first time since entering the room, Merida spoke in a voice that was almost normal, almost like how the subject remembered it. Accent and all. "What kind of deal are we talking about here?"

"That would be up for negotiation, including but not limited to being allowed to be outpatients of the facility or having family be outpatients." Dr. Gold said, "You'll just have to do a little favor for me."

Merida's jaw dropped as her eyes lit up, for a moment they were blue ones more. Then they turned to face the subject and the feral look to her was back. She was all yellow eyes and bared teeth and the subject almost felt like she was looking at herself.

"Belle and Ms. Li over here," Dr. Gold gestured towards Belle who was still trying to get lose from her restraints and Mulan who was throwing her head back and clenching her uninjured fist. "They just have to tell me what they know so they don't end up being put in the room with you for tonight's full moon."

Gold pressed something and the glass wall darkened until they could only see distorted versions of their reflections. "On my signal now."

The guards holding onto the subjects' chains started to brace themselves.

"Three…"

Merida couldn't seem to clench her fists given the length of her claws, but she was twitching them like she was eager to dig them into the subject.

"Two…"

Anything the subject felt earlier -from the hunger pangs before her transportation, to the ear and head pain from the sound- was now washed out and all that remained was a coldness buried deep in her being as she remembered Dorothy and the impact with the bookshelf that broke her.

" _One_."

The guards unhooked the chains and retreated. Merida launched herself forward on all fours, closing the distance between them in two bounds, tackling the subject to the ground. They hit the floor with the subject heavily landing on her back and Merida moving to put her thighs around the subject's waist.

Seeing the anger and pain in Merida's eyes laid heavy layers of guilt over the subject and she only watched as Merida lifted a clawed hand and swiped down, cutting through the subject's cheek in a swipe that rattled her skull with the impact.

Instinctively, the subject lifted her hands up to cover her face, but Merida easily swiped them away and struck again, swiping across the subject's face, crossing over the cuts that were starting to close.

It was painful, feeling the claws cut into her, deeply splitting the skin and grazing the bone only for her healing to repair the damage before the claws struck again.

But that couldn't compare to the pain that Merida had gone through.

"You _killed_ her!" Merida roared out the accusation in a voice that echoed in the subject's ears. "I saw her just lying there. Just _dead_!"

The subject's lack of resistance seemed to frustrate Merida since she got up off of the subject and started to pace around her. "What you do have to say for yourself?"

A kick to her stomach knocked the wind out of the subject and she curled up into herself.

"You broke her!" Merida sent another kick towards the subject's lower back, but she stayed where she was, on the floor and taking whatever was dealt to her. "I saw them take her away in a body bag!"

Another kick came in, this time aimed at the subject's face, throwing her head back and sending her limp body sliding to the side.

"FIGHT BACK!" The subject felt clawed hands grasping at her gown and roughly pulling her up to her feet. "DO SOMETHING!"

It was instinct again to put her hands up to cover her face, but she forced herself to lower them down to her sides. The blood that had spilled out of a now-healed broken nose and previously slashed up face made it hard to see, but she forced herself to meet Merida's eyes and respond with a shake of the head.

"Why not?" Merida shook the subject. "You had no trouble attacking a classroom full of people that day!"

Memories of that event kept hitting the subject as Merida shook her again. There had been the screaming that had overwhelmed her, and there had been an powerful need to strike down the people blocking her way to the door. There had been a horrible urge to tear into Mr. Spencer for being so hard on her. There had been Merida, screaming about Dorothy and running towards the subject to confront her for what she'd done.

"What's _wrong_ with you?" Merida roughly shoved the subject backward. She stumbled but was able to catch her footing before lifting a hand to wipe at the blood covering her face. The texture that greeted her told her that most of the claw marks hadn't left lasting damage but a few lines didn't close properly from the constant barrage.

As Merida started to take steps towards her, the subject resisted the urge to move back and just stood and watched as another clawed hand came at her head, cutting into her face and sending her to the floor.

The usual warm and cold feeling of her body healing itself was becoming a burning pain as it struggled to keep up with the continuous blows and injuries.

"Get up, Ruby!" Merida sent a kick into the subject's ribs and the sharp pain and difficulty breathing meant at least one rib was cracked or broken.

It took several wheezy breaths and burning pain for her body to reset the bone and close the punctured lung. The subject was getting lightheaded and weak.

"Get up!"

With shaky hands, the subject propped herself up onto all fours. Her breathing was ragged as she fought to get enough air into her lungs.

"GET _UP_!"

Despite her unsteady legs, the subject was able to get herself to her feet and stand over Merida. But still, fighting back wasn't an option. Merida needed this and the subject deserved this.

"Why won't you fight back?" Merida demanded, giving the subject another shove. "What's changed?"

The subject just shook her head. Nothing changed. She was still a monster and this was what happened to monsters. Their pasts came back with a vengeance for inevitable retribution.

Another swipe of Merida's claws came in, this time cutting deep into the subject's stomach and she found herself having to put her hands over the bloody gown and press down on her insides threatening to spill out before her body could properly fix itself.

Her legs gave way under her and she collapsed to the floor, clutching at her stomach and keeping everything inside as her body struggled to heal.

* * *

"Stop this!" Belle strained against the straps and wished she could be anywhere but here, forced to watch Merida beat Ruby with a brutality that was sickening and frightening. "Stop her!"

The readings on Ruby's vitals showed that her healing was starting to slow and her heartbeat was very elevated as it dealt with the stress and dealt with constantly pumping blood through her constantly regenerating body.

Looking over at Mulan who was quiet save for her shaky breaths, showed that she was very pale and the impaled hand was swollen while the other trembled. Sweat dripped from Mulan's face and down to her pants.

When she met Belle's eyes, they were bloodshot, with tears collecting in the swollen skin.

"Please!" Belle felt tears in her own eyes as she looked to Gold. "Please, just stop it! I'll tell you what I know."

As she spoke, Belle heard her own voice breaking and cracking and she had to take a few breaths before she whimpered, "Just please, just stop _everything_."

Gold looked intrigued now as he turned away from the fight to look at Belle. "Really?"

"Belle." Mulan's voice was rough, and even after she cleared her throat, the next word still came out gravelly. "Don't."

"What else do we have left?" Belle felt herself breaking. "We're losing and I don't know how else to stop this." Blinking only made more tears fall as she faced Gold. "Please, if I tell you what we know about Neal and all of them, will you treat Mulan and get Ruby out of there?"

"That sounds fair." Gold said, "Hopper is on standby and ready to treat that hand if you cooperate."

"No." Mulan's voice was soft at first, before she tried again, "He's still going…" A shudder passed through Mulan, and she had to wait until she could continue in a more steady voice. "…to k-kill me… either way."

Belle looked from Mulan to Gold, "You're not going to do that, are you?"

There was no immediate answer from Gold, and that wasn't a good sign.

"As f-far as… he's concerned…" Mulan shut her eyes and breathed in and out, struggling through the pain, "I'm not… leaving this place… alive."

"That's enough." Gold put his hand around the hilt of the knife and instead of pulling it out, he jerked it backwards towards Mulan's wrist, widening the cut and increasing whatever damage had already been done.

The fresh screams that came out of Mulan were agonizing.

* * *

Surroundings spinning in and out of focus, Merida a blur, the subject could barely keep herself upright before she was struck down again.

Her stomach had managed to close and keep her insides back _inside_ , but the internal damage was still healing itself, still putting things back in place and stitching up the shredded organs damaged by Merida's claws.

And now the subject was on her back again, waist between Merida's thighs, pinned down by the throat.

"Why did you do it?" Merida's words came out heavy and breathy as she grasped the subject by the torn up and bloody gown, pulling her close. Her next words were whispered. "I could snap your neck right now and just end you before they can stop me."

Trembling and barely able to focus on Merida, the subject managed to nod.

"Why aren't you fighting back?" There was a wetness to Merida's eyes now and the amber was starting to cool. "Why won't you even defend yourself?"

Drained and delirious from the pain, the subject let her head hang back as Merida tugged at the gown.

" _Ruby_!" Merida's voice was breaking. She shoved downwards, slamming the subject into the ground. Her head painfully impacted with the floor. " _Say something_!"

Everything hurt and the wolf was urging the subject to defend herself but she dug her claws into her palms and reminded herself that this was how things were meant to happen. This was justice. This was what she deserved for everything she'd done.

"You killed her." There was less of a growl now, more of a shaky breath as Merida's eyes, fully blue again, blinked back tears. "And when you…" She was breathing heavily and starting to tremble. "… _bit_ me…"

Merida shook her head and it was starting to feel like she was leaning on the subject instead of using bodyweight to pin her down. "…it triggered my curse."

The words brought the subject back to that evening in the park, sitting on the swings and lazily swaying as they talked about their homes and their families. Of Merida fearing the dormant curse would be triggered some day.

And it _was_.

By none other than the monster who killed Peter and Dorothy.

"And now my brothers are here too." One of Merida's hands let go of the subject's gown to wipe at a face covered in blood, sweat and tears. "You ruined _everything_."

Words. She needed to say the words.

It was hard to get them out and it was hard to say them, but she had to. They were words that Merida needed to hear and the subject needed to say.

"I'm…" the subject heard her own voice come out raspy and soft, "…s-sorry."

There was a tingling, strange feeling. In her head. Different from the dizziness she was already feeling.

That was when she felt it. She felt the pain that Merida felt at seeing Dorothy get thrown across the room. The pain of seeing her body smash into the bookshelf. The anger at seeing Ruby clawing and biting at people in the way of the door, tearing into Mr. Spencer. The anger that drove Merida to charge forward and try to attack Ruby, only to be pinned down and bitten. The agony of the bite sending fire through her bloodstream.

The sick feeling of triumph at watching people shoot at Ruby until she was unconscious. The despair of seeing Dorothy being put away in a body bag. The terror of waking up in the facility and being told her condition was triggered and mutated by the bite.

The anger at finding out they had experimented on her brothers and triggered their curse as well.

The fury of knowing that Ruby was somewhere in the facility as well.

The long days and long nights. The experiments of cutting into her and shocking her and burning her to see how her body healed. The full moon. The headaches that came before and the fatigue and hunger that came after. The sight of footage of her turning into a bear when her emotions were at their peak. The frustration of being denied the privilege to see her father on weekends. The sorrow of the times she _did_ get to see her father and see the smiles and jokes they put on the surface to hide the despair they felt underneath.

And through it all, the only reason to get up and get through the tests was the thought of some day coming across Ruby.

It riddled the subject with guilt to know just how much of Merida's life had been taken away and shattered.

She could recall her own experiences. Waking up to Peter's remains. Being told by Mother to go to school and act like nothing was wrong. Being overwhelmed in the classroom. Panicking. Completely and utterly losing control. Waking up to Dr. Gold explaining what happened. Being abandoned by Mother.

Realizing that Ruby Lucas was gone and only Subject 204 remained.

Going through the tests and the experiments as her penance and punishment. Refusing to let her body give out and die because she didn't deserve an end to her suffering.

But now… she was tired.

 _She wants you to kill her._ Emma's voice came through the link. _She thinks you deserve your vengeance and she deserves her punishment._

The shocked look in Merida's eyes showed that she had heard the voice as well.

_Do you know what deal Gold wants to make? What favor he's going to ask from you?_

Merida's anger was still burning through her, but she was tired too. And she realized that she hadn't thought about what favor Gold would want. She had just felt like taking the opportunity to hit two birds with one stone. Hurt Ruby and make a deal to better her family's living conditions.

 _He wants you to kill Mulan. Maybe even Belle._ Emma's anger rippled through them. _Mulan tried to set your family free. Tried to fight off the guards. Tried to protect you. Are you really willing to make a deal with the devil and be his new pet killer? Are you really willing to kill Mulan for him?_

Merida was hesitating now, and torn.

 _You don't want to be a monster. Ruby doesn't either. But that little piece of shit goblin has been trying real damn hard to fuck you two over and turn you into his pet monsters. You're better than that. You're_ more _than that._

"204." Dr. Gold's voice came in through the speakers. "206. What's going on there?"

_We can't keep Mulan waiting much longer and it won't be too long before the full moon comes out so I hope to god or whatever's up there that you don't kill each other because it's time to move._

Then all the lights went off, from the ceiling lights to the machine lights. Only the dull glow of the collars and cuffs shed any sort of brightness.

In the eerie quiet where at first the subject could only hear her and Merida's breaths, she thought she heard shouting and scuffling in the floors above and below.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was gonna just give you guys one long-ass chapter but then I figured why not be an asshole and cut it into two because I crave the attention and also because I need more time to develop the next part. I have a broad outline for how I want the next part to play out but I want to polish it up first. IN THE MEANTIME ENJOY THIS ONE AND WALLOW IN IT.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have mixed feelings about how this chapter plays out BUT I DID WHAT I COULD and there are some parts that I feel like I like so let me know what you think I guess?
> 
> [BY THE WAY CHECK OUT THIS BEAUTY FROM LETICIA ](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10996224/chapters/24493239)  
> \- it's a piece that shows Regina's POV and experiences with Emma before and leading up to meeting Belle AWYEA~~

After being slapped into silence, Belle felt like her throat was hoarse from screaming and begging when Gold shifted the knife in Mulan's hand. She was breathing heavily, throwing her head side to side and biting back her whimpers though tears were already streaking down her battered face.

That was when Gold noticed the lull in the one-sided fight. Just before the lights all went out, leaving them in pitch blackness.

As their eyes adjusted and focused on any semblance of brightness, Belle could only see the dull glow of the collars and cuffs on Merida and Ruby.

And it was eerily quiet. The humming and beeping of the machinery was gone. The silence pressed into her ears and Mulan's ragged breathing and hissing seemed to echo, accompanied by the heavy beats of Belle's own panicking heart.

"What happened?" Gold's voice came from somewhere in front of Belle. "Igor, get the generator running."

There was the distinct sound of clicking, like trying to flip a switch. "I can't contact the maintenance, sir. The radios are down."

Agitation was clear in Gold's voice as he made his way over to somewhere behind Belle. "Then _go down there_ and _get it done_."

"But sir, that's six floors down, I-"

"USE THE STAIRS." Gold snapped.

There was shuffling footsteps moving across the room, a thudding sound and a gasp as Igor hit something. A dragging sound as he moved the obstacle out of the way, more footsteps and then finally the sound of a door being pushed. The steps faded away as Igor made his way down the hall.

"The guards should be on standby." Whale said, "This might be another attack."

"It might be." Gold grumbled the words.

"Sir," Gaston's deep rumble echoed in the quiet darkness. "Shall we escort you-"

The monitors came on, startling most of them. At first the screens only showed static, before a face started to take shape. Looking around, Belle saw that they were all showing the same footage as Neal came into view. It took some craning of her neck but Belle was able to see that Gold looked pale and stiff.

Neal's brow was furrowed, his lips curled as he spoke. "Hi, Dad."

"B-Baelfire?" Gold gasped, the harsh lines to his face highlighted by the monitors. "Is that… is that you?" The disbelief was as clear in his voice as it was in his face.

The strain of looking behind her was stiffening Belle's neck. She turned away to look at the vaguely highlighted forms of Ruby and Merida, who were now crouched down on the floor next to each other, Merida no longer striking Ruby down. It was hard to make out what they were doing but the pause was a relief.

In the limited light, the reflections on the floor showed where it was wet and slick with blood.

"Looks like you haven't changed much." Neal's voice came through every speaker. "Or maybe you've gotten _worse_." There was an echo to the words as just about every device with audio output broadcasted the message, from the room speakers to the computer speakers to even the radios of the stunned guards. " _Much_ worse."

"You're behind this?" Gold spluttered the words. "You were _part_ of this? _Why_?"

"You've crossed way too many lines." The monitors showing Neal's face all faded to footage of the different floors and rooms in the facility. Multiple subjects -both humanoid and bestial- were running lose and charging through the hallways and equipment. Assistants and guards were struggling to subdue and contain them. "And now it's _our turn_."

The door slammed open, drawing their attention to it as Regina strode in. With a flick of her wrist, the straps restraining Belle and Mulan were unbuckled. Another gesture knocked Gold to the ground.

Upon seeing their superior knocked down, the guards started moving towards Regina, Gaston in the lead. He was just about to close the distance, prod in hand, when Regina brought her hand forward, sending the guards out through the other door.

With the straps gone, Belle immediately rushed to Mulan's side, putting hands on her face to support her head and look at her pale and clammy face. "Mulan, what do I do?"

She was trembling and her breaths were coming in fast wheezes.

"Mulan?"

"Aurora…" Mulan whispered the name and Belle wasn't sure if it was deliriousness or if Aurora was making contact with Mulan. "R-remove… blade…" Her voice was shaky was her teeth chattered, "…out… way it came… in."

Taking in a breath, Mulan tried to speak but could only let out a whimper.

 _After Gold jerked it around, it's even more of a mess than it could have been_. Aurora's fury burned through them as she made contact. _We have to pull it out but it's going to be a bloody mess even after we lift her hand above heart level._

"Let me take a look." Regina was standing by them now and Belle looked to see that she had managed to get Gold, Whale and the assistants to sit on the floor and stay out of the way. Meanwhile the guards on the other side of the door continued to batter it to try to get through. Through the glass wall, Ruby and Merida could be seen being approached by other guards. "Emma should be leading the Dunbrochs to the vehicle now."

Putting a hand over Mulan's forearm, Regina spoke with a softness and gentleness that Belle hadn't heard before. "Mulan, dear, I'm going to pull the knife out and close the skin the keep you from bleeding out. I'll also try to reattach some of the severed nerves and muscles."

Aurora was nervous and desperately wishing she could push through the barriers of the universe to project her physical form into the space instead of being resigned to just watching helplessly. It was hard to be sure, but Belle thought she could almost imagine Aurora standing next to Mulan and putting a hand over her uninjured one.

"D-done this-s…" Mulan was trembling as Belle supported her head and brushed damp hair out of her swollen face. "…b-be…f-fore?"

"No." Regina's blunt answer wasn't particularly reassuring for anyone before she added, "But I've done some study and research on anatomy when I wanted to go to med school."

Aurora's panicked energy blasted through them all. Out of the corner of her eye, Belle thought she could almost see Aurora stomping her foot and clenching the fist that wasn't holding Mulan's. What was surprising was when they heard the voice with their ears and not just their minds.

"If you mess it up any more than it already is, Regina, so help me-"

"I've got it, Aurora. Yes." Regina failed to keep the grumble out of her voice. "Focus on giving her strength and comfort."

It was surreal, seeing Aurora through peripheral vision but seeing just an empty space whenever Belle focused on the spot next to Mulan.

"Okay." Regina took a breath to prepare herself and Belle found herself doing the same. "Let's do this."

Belle had to keep herself from also trembling as she supported Mulan's head and watched with sick, stomach-twisting fascination.

With a hand still on Mulan's forearm, Regina used the other to take hold of the knife's hilt. Blood was still seeping out around the blade, joining the wide pool already collecting on the floor around Mulan's feet.

When Regina eased the knife upward, Mulan's breathing grew more erratic, punctured by whimpers. Aurora was whispering things to Mulan and stroking her clenched fist and tense shoulder, "Just hang on, just think about what it's going to be like when you're out of here."

"I'm sorry," Regina whispered as she continued to work the knife out as carefully as she could. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

The gushing, open wound was starting to close but seeing the blood and bone and muscle made Belle lightheaded. She had to look away to keep herself from fainting or throwing up. Mulan was pressing her head against Belle's hands and breathing through gritted teeth.

"Think of that ride you promised me." Aurora was bending over Mulan, stroking her cheek, pressing against her hand, sending waves of warmth and comfort. "Think of the roadtrip you wanted to take me on with your bike when it's all over. Think of the rush of riding down the highway with my arms around your waist."

"G-gotta…" Mulan scrunched up her face and breathed in and out. "b-buy you… a... a helmet… f-first."

Banging sounds of the guards pounding into the door added an extra level of pressure. They had to get out soon. Guards were at both doors and they were boxed in. How they were going to get out of this in one piece was beyond Belle. Especially without the careful planning they had last time.

Mulan's shaky yelp rushed out of her as Regina pulled the knife out and let it clatter to the floor. A glance at the mangled hand and the blood gushing out of it made Belle's stomach lurch. She looked away and focused instead on supporting Mulan's head as she tensed up.

"Shit. Shit. Shit." Regina cursed under her breath. "There's bone fragments and severed nerves, tendons and muscles. Shit."

"FIX IT." Aurora demanded, blasting her agitated desperation at Regina.

Chancing a glance at Mulan's hand, Belle saw Regina holding it while bits and pieces moved around at the call of her abilities. More blood was gushing out and everything looked so macabre that Belle felt her gag reflex try to wretch out the last meal. Quickly looking away and swallowing it back, Belle decided it was better to just keep her eyes on anything but there.

Until the doors burst open and Gaston charged in, gun at the ready. Before anyone could react, he fired and Regina hit the ground.

* * *

The guards were closing in on them with their prods and the subject found herself back to back with Merida as the guards surrounded them. To make matters worse, the headaches were getting intense and it was taking all her effort to stay on her feet as the pain pounded into her skull and made her eyes burn up while her claws lengthened. The heavy breathing coming from Merida hinted she was also feeling the early effects of the shift.

Then she cast a glance at the glass wall and saw Regina on the floor, blood gushing out of her shoulder. Mulan hunched over on the chair and cradling her hand. Belle with her hands behind her head as Gaston jerked her around with his hand on the collar of her shirt.

As the burning in her eyes and pounding in her head threatened to take over her entire body, the subject fought back the transformation threatening to crash over her. She willed her shoulders back into place, growled and charged forward.

A prod jammed into her barely healed stomach, knocking her down and sending agony through her body.

It was a blur of pain before suddenly stopping and the subject looked up to see Merida fighting the guards, lashing out with her claws when they tried to jam at her with their prods. A few managed to get past her defenses and knock her down, but she got back up again.

Before a guard could drive another prod towards her, the subject scrambled out of the way and knocked him to the side. She then turned to look at the glass wall again where Gaston had knocked Belle to the ground and pointed the gun at her while Regina curled up on the floor, hand over her bleeding shoulder. Mulan was shakily trying to stand up but crumpled to the floor next to Regina. More guards were coming in and starting to escort the other scientists and assistants out but Gold seemed to be insistent on staying in the room.

The subject charged towards the glass and drove herself into it.

Though the impact rushed the air out of her body, the glass didn't even dent. She growled swiping at it with her claws, barely grazing the material.

They were roughly handling the people who had been kind to her and offered comfort to her. That wasn't something the subject could just stand by and watch. She continued to claw at the material and pound into it, trying to get inside.

* * *

"Sir, we have to escort you out." Gaston was talking to Gold while a guard wrestled with trying to subdue Belle.

They were so close, she couldn't let them cuff her and drag her away again. She couldn't let them kill Mulan or Regina. She couldn't leave them. Strong hands had already managed to grab one of hers and she clawed at his face, tried to go for his eyes but he swung with one fist, catching her under the chin. She felt her teeth dig into her lip and her vision flash.

The guard roughly turned Belle over so he could pin her down and cuff her hands behind her back. She didn't make it easy, struggling to crawl away until he put his knee against her back and twisted her arm behind her.

Aurora was trying to subdue the guards by pulling at their consciousness but they were too alert and she had already expelled a great deal of energy projecting so much of herself into supporting Mulan. They felt her presence starting to fade.

Belle feared it would be a long time once more until she would see Aurora again.

The doors burst open but instead of more guards coming into the room, Emma charged in, launching herself at Gaston and grabbing the hand still holding his gun. The entrance had surprised him enough to send the gun slipping from his hands and Emma managed to kick it away before he knocked her to the ground with a kick to the stomach and an elbow to the back.

Taking advantage of the distraction, Belle tried to squirm away from the guard pinning her down. Mulan had better luck even in her pained, pale state, managing to elbow the face of a guard and deliver a savage kick to the crotch. Still cradling her hand close to her chest, Mulan threw herself at the guard pinning Belle down, sending them all into a tangle of limbs.

There was a scuffle of bodies Belle managed to crawl away from, only to find herself face to face with another guard with a gun.

Through the initial panic of facing down the barrel of something that could swiftly kill her, Belle managed to look past it and see that the guard was younger, maybe her age even. His grasp was stiff and the gun trembled in his hands. A glance at his uniform showed his last name to be Ling.

"D-don't move!" His voice was high, breathy and shaky. "Or I'll shoot!"

An all too familiar wrenching scream filled the room. Belle chanced a glance to the side to see the guard with his boot over Mulan's mangled hand. To the other side, Regina was also being pinned down by another guard, but she was focusing intently on the glass wall.

And it _shattered_.

Then so many things were happening way too fast.

A massive bear was smashing its way through the guards and machines and soon most of them were focused on trying to subdue her with their prods and guns.

Ruby's wolf was also powering through the guards, barely wincing as they shot at her. A few brought out their prods and started to electrocute her.

Until the gleam from the prods just went off. All of them. Belle realized it was Neal's work when she noticed the monitors no longer showing footage of the chaos on different levels of the facility. The screens just showed flickering static that cast them all in sharp highlights and deep shadows. It must be Neal conserving his energy and using it instead on deactivating every prod.

The guards frantically tried to click their prods back to life, only to find themselves face to face with a snarling wolf and a raging bear.

Ling ended up leaving Belle and panicking, running out through the door to the hallway. A few guards also panicked. Gaston yelled obscenities at them though it could barely be heard over Merida's roars as she knocked over the remaining guards and sank her teeth into shoulders and limbs. Belle had to look away from the sight and instead rushed to Mulan and Regina, who were both still bleeding, pale and clammy. Emma crawled over to their side, hand clamped over a bloody spot on her leg.

"Stray bullet when they shot at Ruby." Emma grunted, then clasped hands with Regina. "Reggie, here."

At first, Belle wasn't sure what was going on, until she noticed the drained, pale look to Regina's eyes starting to fade away, replaced by a stronger spark. Emma was giving Regina some energy or strength or life or _something_. "Now heal that shoulder and Mulan's hand so we can get the fuck out of here."

Regina put a hand over her injured shoulder before glancing at Emma. "Really? Not your leg? Are you expecting me to carry you out?"

"Yeah." Emma smirked. "Bridal style, preferably."

This was probably the worst time to be flirting and fucking around. Specially not to the background noise of growling from Ruby and Merida, swearing from Gaston, gunshots from remaining guards and wails from injured ones.

Belle wasn't sure if by this point, it was a coping mechanism to talk lightheartedly in the middle of the chaos or if they were all so damaged from everything that the time and place for jokes was _any_ time.

"That's probably it." Emma responded out loud to Belle's thought.

"Quick, just get yourselves healed." Belle stood up and saw Merida standing over several guards who were writhing in pain but still thankfully alive. Knowing the turmoil that Ruby felt at what she'd done, Belle couldn't let Merida feel the same. "Merida. Can you hear me?"

The bear huffed and snarled at the guards, bringing her teeth dangerously close to the faces of one of them.

"Merida…" Belle inched closer to the bear. "You don't want to kill them."

Still snarling, the bear turned to face Belle and it was unsettling to see the glowing amber eyes now focusing on her. Fear ran through Belle as Merida stepped over the guards and started walking over, powerful shoulders rippling, fur standing along her neck and on either side of the collar.

As Belle started to back away, Ruby moved in between them, growling at Merida with raised hackles and a stiff tail.

For a tense moment it looked like they were going to start fighting as they both faced off with their bared teeth and burning eyes.

Then Merida huffed and backed down, turning her head and body away.

An arm grabbed Belle from behind, wrapping around her neck and pulling her backwards. One hand was grasping her shirt while the other pressed a bloody knife against her neck. "You are _not_ leaving here with them, dearie."

"Gold, you're fucking outnumbered!" Emma's voice came from behind them.

The low chuckle rumbling through Gold was disturbing as he pressed the knife more forcefully against her neck, the blade starting to dig into her jaw. It was a sharp, frightening pain and Belle felt her body tensing up as he started to move them towards the door. "Then maybe I should just even the numbers out, eh? How valuable is Belle to you?"

Ruby was growling and lowering her head, looking just about ready to pounce.

The sound of a gunshot filled the room, accompanied by Ruby's yelp, before she turned to face the source of the bullet that hit her shoulder. It was Gaston, on the floor and bleeding from a gash across his face and wounds on his back. He fired several more rounds at Ruby.

Though the bullets hurt her and made her bleed, Ruby was still standing and now probably very angry. She charged forward and Belle dreaded to witness a brutal kill, but was surprised to see that instead of going straight for the neck, Ruby went for the hand, clamping down until Gaston let go of the gun.

Before he could reach for it with his other hand, Ruby slid it aside with her nose.

Then she returned her attention to Gold, growling and angry.

* * *

She felt it.

The power rippling through her body despite the bullets it was working on pushing out, despite the starvation that left her with only limited muscle over her bones, despite the exhaustion from fighting Merida.

The rage all directed at Gold and everything he stood for, from the pain he put her through in the name of curing her, to the torture he had inflicted on innocent people. From the gold teeth in his smile to the way he pressed the bloody silver knife against Belle's throat.

The weight of the last seven years was crashing over her as she saw him for what he truly was.

And she wanted nothing more than to tear into him, rip away his skin, dig her teeth into his flesh, yank out his guts, break his bones, shake his broken body side to side.

But as Gold pressed the knife into Belle hard enough to draw blood under her jaw, the wolf had to hesitate.

"None of you move." Gold had his face pressed close to Belle's cheek as he worked his way past them and towards the door. "If you even _think_ about throwing me back with your abilities, 201, I'm going to cut into her. And if Aurora is somewhere out there thinking of making me sleep, I am going to drive this right through Belle's neck and _out the other side_."

They moved further backward.

It was Belle that acted first, driving her heel into Gold's foot and grabbing at the knife to pull it away from her. In the scuffle that followed, Belle looked to be holding the knife by the blade and trying to wrestle it from Gold.

That was the opening the wolf needed. She leaped forward, knocking him away from Belle and onto the ground.

And as she stood over him, growling, she felt power she had never had before. He had no knife or prod or ear-piercing sound. He was just a small man without any weapons left. She could kill him right now and it would be the easiest thing. Her teeth were just itching to sink into him.

"You see, 204?" Though fear shown in his eyes, Gold started to talk in a cool and even voice. "You're a monster. A beast. You're dangerous and you need me to keep yourself from killing people."

His words were sharp blades hitting her chest as she remembered how well he had trained her to control the wolf. How much he challenged her to control the part of herself that wanted to rip and tear and _kill_. How hard he tried to keep her under his control when she became feral.

And she remembered the people he had cured using her blood.

"You're a ticking time bomb, 204." Gold continued, seeming to notice her hesitation. "Without me, you're just going to kill again. The outside world isn't the place for you. It's just a bigger classroom out there. You don't want that, do you?"

Flashes of the classroom came back to her. Of the students she knocked down. Of the people she bit. Of the lives she took away. Of the damage and trauma she left behind. Of the pain Merida went through for seven years.

She looked away from Gold and saw the injured guards. Gaston curled up, a shell of the hulking man who jostled her roughly around and made her restraints too tight. The others pressed against the wall and cowering away from Merida.

 _Merida_.

She was growling and pacing, trying to keep control of herself and the wolf knew that struggle all too well.

Could they really manage to control themselves on the outside? Even now, the temptation to just tear Gold apart was almost overpowering.

But she saw the faces of people who had given her support, comfort, solidarity. Emma still had a hand over her bloody leg. Regina had managed to heal her shoulder. Belle had a bloody palm pressed against her bleeding neck. Mulan's injured hand was covered in blood but the wound didn't seem to be gaping anymore.

They had shown her a different side.

A different side to the cookie.

Gold's side was all about fear and pain.

Emma, despite not having the pain threshold of a wolf, insisted on staying with the subject through the transformation, insisted on staying with the subject through electrocutions, insisted on showing the subject that she was not alone.

Regina showing the wolf understanding, relating to the pain of having a dark past but sharing resolve to move forward.

Mulan breaking away from the rigid rules to show the subject humanity and remind her of her past, remind her of when she wasn't a monster or a test subject. Showing small acts of kindness in the form of the laughter and the food.

And Belle. No supernatural abilities like Regina and Emma. No physical training like Mulan. No long time spent at the facility like any of the three. She got attached and wouldn't let go. And she was patient with the subject. She didn't rush her to get out or to talk or to do anything. She always asked. She always _always_ asked. She had shown the subject kindness and gentleness and care and concern.

She had reassured the subject that they would help her stay human. They would remind her how to be human.

"What's it going to be, 204?" Gold asked. "Some flimsy therapy sessions with them to keep yourself from being a monster? Or my proven methods? What do you want, 204?"

The familiar jerking, burning, wrenching feeling in her body started on the inside, but this time she felt more in control of it. She felt her back push and pull itself into place, her shoulders popping in and out, her limbs breaking and connecting and breaking again and connecting again. Her ribs cracking and bending. Her Face crumbling back into itself.

And she was kneeling over Gold.

She reached over and grabbed him by his coat, pulling him close to her. The temptation was there again. The urge to sink her teeth into his neck and tear him apart, destroy him the way he had destroyed her for seven years. There was still an anger she felt and yet there was also still a strong part of her that wanted to just apologize for everything and go back to the way things were.

"204, what-"

She shook him to quiet him, then let go of his shirt.

"My… name…" There was a strange, giddy kind of fear as she geared herself up to say it, but she knew it was the first step towards being human again. Being herself again. "…is-s… is…" She breathed in and out, steadied her voice, spoke as clearly as she could in her rough and unaccustomed throat. "…R-Ruby."

Gold's eyes were wide and it dawned on her that it was the first time in years since he heard her speak. It was Tamara, Whale, Hopper and Belle who last heard her.

Killing him wasn't going to do anything other than prove him right.

But she so badly wanted to kill him, right here and right now. With her claws and with her teeth.

That was what a monster would do though. And she didn't want to be just like him.

"You…" The words still sounded strange in her mouth, but she got herself to say them anyway. "… are the monster."

She stood up and stepped away from him, looking towards the group for what to do next.

Belle was the one to move first, grabbing a discarded labcoat and putting it over Ruby.

 _Ruby_.

It felt strange, still, to think of herself as Ruby. She still wasn't sure if she felt like Ruby. Part of her still doubted if she was really Ruby and if she really deserved to be called Ruby. But she did what she could to swallow that part down.

Emma had retrieved a discarded gun and pointed it at Gold, keeping him from making anything worse while Regina helped Mulan to her feet. Though the injured hand wasn't bleeding profusely, it still looked severely swollen and disfigured. The toll the torture had taken on Mulan was visible as she leaned on Regina for support, still pale.

"Aurora says a lot of the subjects have already made it out. Merida's family are already in the first vehicle. Killian is contacting the father and arranging a meeting point." Emma gestured for them to get moving. "We have to get Merida to them. Neal and Aurora are ready for us with the truck."

"People are starting to gather outside the building and someone's managed to call the police so we have to move now." Regina helped Mulan as they made their way through the door. "Neal's starting to feel the strain of keeping the generator and the power under control. We might not have much time."

With Emma still pointing the gun at Gold and at any guard that twitched, Ruby turned towards Merida, still trapped in her bear form and still trying to fight the beast for control. She was pacing and throwing her head side to side, huffing and grumbling.

"Merida." Ruby stiffened when the bear turned to her, but managed to relax her body when she saw confusion and fear instead of anger in the amber eyes. She reached out a hand towards Merida, who flattened her ears back but didn't move away.

She felt that tingling feeling again, and recognized it as Emma linking the two of them together as Ruby's hand touched Merida's face.

There was the guilt at the way she had lashed out at and bitten the guards, injuring them and leaving them now bleeding on the floor. There was the fear at what she was capable of, at the strength in her body and the rage in her heart.

There was still the pain of the past. Those scars would not be going away in one night. She still didn't forgive Ruby and she wasn't going to forget what happened.

But she was willing to reach out to Ruby anyway.

They both didn't want to be monsters and they both didn't want to be hurt by Gold anymore. They both wanted to be free of this place.

Merida wanted to be with her family. She wanted to be just the way she was before the classroom incident. Able to go home and worry about girls and binge movies and shows. Able to live as close to normal a life as possible.

But that had been taken away. It could not be given back, no matter how much Ruby wished she could.

Their only choice now was to move forward.

As their energies linked, the bear started to shrink into itself, fur falling away, bones reforming. It wasn't a pretty sight. The pain was still in Merida's transformation as she moved away from Ruby, recoiling and gasping. The audible sound of her breaking bones and shrinking joints filled the room, punctuated by her gasps and screams.

And through the link, Ruby shared some of the pain, gritting her teeth and digging her nails into her palms.

Sharing the pain made things faster, easier. Merida was eventually left crouching on the floor and Ruby took one of the labcoats hanging from the door and just like Belle, helped Merida to cover herself with it. They didn't speak then. There were still unresolved feelings and lingering scars.

But they could feel each other. They both felt like monsters and both didn't want to be.

"Ruby," At the sound of her name in Belle's voice, Ruby turned away from Merida and focused on the task at hand. "You did good." The smile on Belle's face was full of pride and it was a strange feeling she didn't know how to respond to or act on.

"Get going." Emma's voice was harsh now, urgent. "Neal's going to get the power back on very soon or pass out. Aurora knows where we can pass to avoid any fighting still going on."

They started filing out of the room, Ruby digging her claws into her palms without really thinking about it until Belle wormed her hand through Ruby's fingers.

* * *

Everything was a blur after that. They followed Emma as she led the way under Aurora's guidance, stepped over the bodies of guards and assistants taken down by the more feral subjects, which hit Belle with the reality that not all of the beings in this facility had the restraint that Ruby and even Merida had.

There was blood on some floors and when they got to the lobby, there was more blood and more bodies. Hopefully, _hopefully_ some of them were just unconscious and could still be saved. A crowd of people were starting to gather outside and for a moment, Belle wasn't sure how they were going to get through.

Until a truck came honking into view, sending the people running out of the way as it crashed through the glass doors and skidded to a halt in front of the group.

Belle didn't know why it surprised her to see Aurora in the driver's seat, Neal hunched over in the passenger's seat.

They piled into the back and closed the doors behind them as Aurora got the truck roaring and screeching back out the way they came in. As they made their way through the parking lot and down the road, Neal damaged the engines of cars trying to pursue them and continued to jam radio signals until he passed out.

As the truck careened its way through the roads, they went through the clothes Aurora had provided. There were several choices and different sizes. Typical Aurora going all the way to the point of being extravagant. But the effort was appreciated. It meant that even the rest of them could change out of their bloody clothes while Ruby and Merida got to wear something other than the hospital gowns they had been stuck in for seven years.

Belle was using baby wipes and hand sanitizer from Aurora to clean away the blood on her face with one recently treated hand while Regina worked on healing the deep cuts on the other hand from when Belle was wrestling the knife away from Gold.

As Regina was finishing up, Belle felt a hand pawing at her shoulder. She turned to see Ruby wearing dark jeans and a red plaid shirt with the buttons undone over a black bra that hung loosely, obviously not clasped. Belle felt her face flush when she realized she was looking at Ruby's torso longer than necessary.

"D-do you need help?" Belle asked, standing up and almost losing her footing when the truck lurched.

Looking sheepish and uncomfortable, Ruby nodded. It dawned on Belle that after so long wearing just the hospital gown and maybe underwear if any, Ruby probably lacked the dexterity and flexibility to do these clasps and buttons with ease.

Given how they didn't do anything in there other than sleep, eat, and be experimented on, Belle wondered what other simple skills Ruby may have lost. Reading maybe? Writing very likely. Eating with utensils? Belle couldn't be sure how Ruby was being fed, the only fact being that it was never enough. Even now, as she moved behind Ruby, Belle could still see each rib under the scarred skin.

"Is it okay if I put my hands under this?" Belle asked, indicating the back of the shirt. At Ruby's nod, Belle slipped her hands under the fabric until she found the hanging straps of the bra and clasped them together. "Do you need help with the buttons as well?"

Ruby shrugged at first, then nodded. Belle moved in front of her, again nearly falling over when Aurora lurched the truck to the side. It was Ruby who caught Belle by the wrist and steadied her.

Keeping her eyes focused on the task at hand, Belle worked on buttoning the shirt, working her way up until the ones just under Ruby's collarbones. "Do you want it all the way or just here?"

A shrug answered Belle's question before Ruby clasped Belle's hand and looked at her, wordlessly expressing her thanks before sitting back down. Belle reclaimed her spot next to Ruby and glanced over to where Emma was helping Merida into a green jacket, easing her arms into the sleeves and adjusting it around her shoulders.

They stopped over at a spot in an alley that Aurora explained was one that Killian had indicated. Neal, who was still groggy and weak but starting to come to after drinking some water, said this was the point where they would have to split up and take separate routes to another destination after waiting for one night. The last update they got from Killian was that he would be bringing the Dunbroch family with him to the new hideout, some cabin in the middle of nowhere owned by someone Killian sold substances to and did jobs for.

What those jobs and substances were was a question none of them particularly felt like asking when their lives and freedom depended on trusting Killian's rushed plan and sketchy connections.

"So we'll split into three groups," Neal put his hands over Ruby's collar and it sparked before unlocking. He threw it into the van. "Hopefully if they had any trackers on these things, leaving them here in the van will throw them off for a bit." He did the same to the cuffs, then worked on Merida.

"Spend the night in any motel, hostel or even some seedy bar if you want, but lay low, pay in cash and don't use your names if anyone asks." Neal glanced from Ruby to Merida, "Get hats or glasses or something if you can. I imagine news will be most focused on them and those buzzed cuts draw attention."

Belle had no phone, tablet, wallet. It hit her how lost she was without her devices to keep in touch with the world and her money to survive in the world. "What about-"

"Aurora's got you covered, fam." Emma preempted Belle. Hopefully that was a habit Emma was going to learn to break. She seemed to have gotten a little too comfortable with communicating telepathically and listening to their thoughts before interjecting with her own input. "Sorry, I'll work on that."

"I'm running dry after withdrawing a shit ton before our first attempt," Aurora retrieved a bag from the truck and went over to them. "But this should be enough for a cheap night for the three groups and transportation to get to the meeting point. Wait for me to contact you tomorrow morning for more details."

The toll of being awake and on an adrenaline high from afternoon to night to _dawn_ hit Belle like a brick. At this point she wouldn't say no to some seedy motel just so she could slip into a nice long slumber.

"How will we be grouped?" Belle asked, not particularly willing to part with Ruby.

"We figured Emma, Regina and myself." Neal answered, "Mulan, Aurora and Merida. Then you and Ruby. Is that okay or do you want me to be with you two?"

Belle wondered if there was an unspoken fear of putting Ruby and Merida together.

"I think Ruby and I would be okay." Belle glanced at Ruby, who nodded but looked uncomfortable as she constantly glanced down the alley. It was easy to forget this was the first time Ruby was seeing the outside world after seven years of machines, bare walls and metal doors.

"Alright then." Neal rubbed his hands together. "Head out, find a place to hole up for the night, wait for contact with Aurora in the morning. That clear with everyone?"

They all nodded and voiced their agreement.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THINGS SHOULD WRAP UP SOOOOON I HOPE. WE SHALL SEE. But yeah, I feel like we've jumped the shark since we're out of the facility now. Awyea. I hope things don't feel too weird and different. Let me know what you think and how you feel! I LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE DO THAT
> 
> Also lol my lady is coming over this weekend and we're going to the beach with our corgi child so I might have trouble updating promptly so we'll see how things go.
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> [ONE MORE THING!! KONAKO DID A THING AGAIN!](http://konako.tumblr.com/post/161082244636)
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>  


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG. I'm sorry this took so long. I kept you guys waiting for like two weeks which must have been a pretty long wait after I've spoiled y'all with daily or every other day chapters. WHOOP. I'm sorry. The beach trip took up the weekend, then I had a birthday, then I had my cousins over and we drank ourselves dumb. And then I also had really bad writer's block trying to figure out where they would spend the night or how they would hide until Killian can come pick them up. The outline for this chapter actually changed a few times and I also ended up cutting it in half since I was feeling pressured and really wanted to finally give y'all SOMETHING after that long af dry spell.
> 
> Also I'm sick again and snuffly and drained BUT I'LL DO MY BEST TO GET US BACK ON TRACK.
> 
>  
> 
> [In the meantime have this picture of my dog daughter from the beach ](https://www.facebook.com/TwixTheChaoticCorgi/)
> 
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> 
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> 
> [And if you haven't yet, check out the Swan Queen spinoff to this that Leticia is working on.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10996224/chapters/24493239)
> 
> NOW LET'S GET ON WITH THIS

Everything seemed so bright and colorful. There was grey on the floor and some of the walls, but there was also just so much _green_ everywhere. Reds and yellows, too. And there was the _sky_.

The sky was just something else.

It was a blue that just stretched out and went on forever and ever. There were some clouds dappling through it, but it was just still so mesmerizing to see such a wide expanse of blue. To see that open space above her head and not see an end to it.

Was that really what the sky looked like? Had it always been that way? She couldn't stop staring at it as she followed Belle east, the direction that Neal had pointed them to go.

Regina, Emma and Neal were going south. Mulan, Aurora and Merida were going west. Neal advised them not to go to a hotel or motel that needs credit cards or ID. He admitted that he himself wasn't particularly familiar with the town and said they could try to be subtle and ask around. The sleazy by-the-hour motels he knew in other cities might not be as easy to find here.

But it was hard to think of their shelter for the night. Not when the sky was just so _big_. She couldn't believe she ever just took it for granted when she was younger. How could anyone not just spend some time just looking up. Looking in wonder at that wide blue so far up above her head.

"Ruby, be careful." Belle steered Ruby around a street lamp she'd nearly walked straight into.

With her fixation on the sky broken, she found herself picking up other details. The smell of the grass, the sound of car engines (which startled her whenever they passed nearby) the distant chatter of people in their homes, someone cooking food with scents she couldn't figure out. There were a lot of scents she couldn't figure out. Scents she could just vaguely associate with images but not with any certainty truly give name to. Scents that made her think of ovens and frying pans, scents that made her think of trash bins, scents that made her think of bathrooms.

"Ruby?" A hand worked its way between her tense fingers, reminding her to relax her hands. "We'll be okay."

The name was still something she had to remind herself was okay to use. She turned to Belle and nodded.

"Wanna have some breakfast?" Belle glanced around, "Or brunch?" She smiled, "I don't know what time it is. Do you?"

Ruby shook her head and worried if it was something she was supposed to know.

"Let's see when we head inside." Belle led the way through the door and into the diner. It wasn't a big place. More of a cozy, family-owned business that vaguely reminded the subject ( _Ruby_! She had to remember she was Ruby again) of the diner run by Dorothy's aunt and uncle. They spent some time working there for a while, Ruby more than Dorothy since Ruby liked having the money and Mother liked knowing her daughter was busy and learning how to be an adult.

Belle chose a table close to the door. A waitress with a bright smile greeted them with menus but seemed to falter upon getting closer to them. As Belle accepted the menus, the waitress glanced around before leaning forward, "Are you girls okay?"

Up close, the subject could see the name tag. There was an I.

No, it was a T. Then an I. Then… A. M? No, N. A again.

Tiana.

Belle looked uneasy and uncomfortable, glancing from Ruby to Tiana and back.

Seeming to realize how uneasy Belle was, Tiana straightened up and said, "What would you like to order?"

"Uh… we'll take a look first." Belle shifted in her seat and waited for Tiana to walk away. Turning to Ruby, Belle whispered, "Do you think she knows?"

Ruby tilted her head to one side and tried to ask what Belle meant but the words were still hard to reach and hard to get out. They just piled up behind her throat until she swallowed them back down.

"About what happened?" Belle continued in a whisper, "About where we came from?"

A glance at the waitress showed that as she did her job, she seemed to occassionally sneak extra glances at them. Did she know? It was possible. Maybe she knew that the subject was a monster and she could tell the subject had to be taken away and back to the facility.

"Ruby." Belle's voice cut through the subject's train of thought. "Let's just try and be alert, I guess? Would you be able to hear if she's talking to anyone about us?"

It would take some focus to cancel out the chatter and clatter of the diner and its customers but she should be able to listen to anything Tiana might say to anyone. A nod answered Belle's question.

"Alright." Belle said, starting to look over the menu. "I'm really hoping they have tea, but I can settle for iced tea or maybe a coffee. Not sure what to eat yet. You?"

Ruby opened up the menu and laid it flat on the table. All the text seemed to jump out at her and she felt overwhelmed by the sight of all the letters all clumped together and spread out across the menu. It dawned on her how little she got to read anything when she was in the facility. At most she read the names on their uniforms. If she was lucky, she could catch glimpses of the monitors but those were usually too technical to understand.

Whining under her breath, Ruby rubbed at her temples and shifted in her seat. She could read books before. She read Twilight cover to cover several times in the past. Reading a menu shouldn't be this hard.

But it was.

"Ruby?" Belle noticed the growing frustration and was starting to lean forward across the table. "Is something wrong?"

Skimming through the menu and getting increasingly frustrated with herself for feeling so bogged down by all the words, Ruby settled for looking at the items with pictures. Eventually, she pointed at a pink milkshake for her drink and a picture of pancakes. Being reduced to this, barely able to read, Ruby felt ashamed of herself. Even the excitement at the thought of being able to eat a good meal felt dull and hollow.

"Strawberry milkshake and classic pancakes?" Belle asked.

That sounded good. Ruby tried to get herself hyped up at the thought of the food, but it still weighed heavily on her that she could barely read.

"Alright. I think I'll have some pancakes too."

Tiana was walking over to them now, still with that odd uncomfortable look just beneath her practiced smile. "Hi, are you ready to order?"

Belle gave their orders. Tiana headed back behind the counter and Ruby tried to focus on the voices in the backroom. The fryer and pots and pans were loud and nearly blocked out Tiana's voice but eventually, Ruby was able to make out some parts of the conversation.

"You really think so?"

"I can't be sure, but something about them…" Tiana said, "They're shifty and tense and the scars on the shaved one are really bad. I can't even imagine how she got them. The other girl has some fresh bruises too. I don't know if they're sisters or friends or something else. I just think that something's wrong."

"They're not from here, are they?"

"I doubt it."

"Let them have their shake and iced tea on the house." The man Tiana was talking to might be older, more of a fatherly or grandfatherly type maybe. "We want to help them but I'd also rather not get involved if they're in trouble."

"They…" Ruby's brow furrowed as she tried to speak. "worrying… about… us."

"Could it be a father maybe? Or boyfriends?" With her full concentration on Tiana's voice, Ruby didn't realize a child was standing right in front of them, staring with his mouth agape. Noticing him startled Ruby, but the boy didn't seem to mind that, just continuing to stare as Ruby relaxed her tensed shoulders.

Not sure how to respond to the situation, Ruby turned to Belle, who took it upon herself to speak to the child, "Hi, is there something we can help you with?"

"Is she an airbender?" The boy pointed at Ruby and did a little bounce, "Is that why her hair is so short?"

Airbender. The term sounded vaguely familiar, but it was hard to place. She could just barely recall images of a bald kid and his friends in blue. There was a guy in it that she was really into. Scarred face, something to do with fire.

"Yeah, she just hasn't gotten her airbending master tattoos yet." Belle answered the boy's question with a bright smile.

"Really?" The boy's eyes were very wide. "Will you be getting them soon?"

"Michael, no." A woman came over and started to shoo the boy away. She gave them an apologetic look, "I'm sorry if he bothered you."

Belle shook her head, "It's fine."

But the woman was already herding her child away and Ruby could hear something along the lines of, "That girl is probably very sick, that's why she looks like that. She's probably very tired so you shouldn't be pestering her like that. Do you understand?"

Another voice reached Ruby's ears, younger this time, coming from the teenagers in a booth nearby.

"Is she some cosplaying freak?"

"If she is, her makeup is on point."

"Dude, she's probably sick as fuck. Look how skinny she is. She looks about ready to die any minute."

"Ha! I wonder if she'll haunt the diner if she dies here."

Shaking her head side to side, Ruby put her elbows on the table and covered her ears. The voices in the diner were all overlapping each other, pounding into her skull and almost reminding her of the horrible sound Gold would create to subdue her.

There were people talking about their food, talking about work, talking about their spouses, talking about their coworkers, talking about their dogs or their kids. There was clattering plate and frying oil coming from behind the counter. The footsteps of the waiters and waitresses. The buzzing of some flies. The clatter of utensils. The cringe-inducing scratching sound of knives and forks on plates. The much and crunch of bacon in people's mouths.

A hand was on her shoulder while another was stroking the hair at the back of her head.

She focused on the sensation of that, the warmth of Belle's palm, the gentleness of her fingers as she smoothed down the short strands then traced shapes then smoothed it down again.

"Ruby?"

Releasing the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding, Ruby felt her tensed body relax. She put her hands down on the table and had to resist the urge to dig her nails into her palms. "B… Belle?"

After a squeeze of Ruby's shoulder, Belle moved back to her seat. It was like she could sense the effort Ruby was putting into resisting the urge to make herself bleed, pressing her palms down flat instead of clenching them into fists. Belle took both of Ruby's hands and made sure it was impossible to form fists without crushing Belle's fingers. "Yes, Ruby?"

Talking was still hard. It didn't come naturally like it did before. The thought of being the kind of person who used to talk and laugh a lot seemed almost alien to Ruby. She could barely imagine how much she used to chatter away with her friends.

Do… I…

The words kept getting stuck.

"I…" Her voice was so hoarse and it sounded so strange to her ears. "look… s-sick…?"

Belle's brow furrowed, "What makes you say that?"

Words were so hard to use. At this point it probably would have been nice to have Emma around to interpret the thoughts and say the words.

"P-people…" Ruby sucked in a breath, braced herself to say more words. She felt her throat tighten to keep them from coming out, "…talk…ing…" The gentle squeeze of her hands helped Ruby steady herself enough to continue speaking, "…about… m-me."

Belle didn't answer right away, just used her thumb to stroke the backs of Ruby's hands.

"Well…" Belle looked at Ruby, met her eyes. "You can't quite blame them for thinking you look sick. What Gold did to you… it shows."

What showed?

Then the subject remembered the footage of herself from Gold's cameras. The gaunt, walking skeleton in chains. And she remembered how her face was rough with scars from Gold's knife and Merida's claws. Her neck still felt strange without the collar, oddly light, but the burn of it still seemed to stay with her. Looking down, she saw noticeable marks on her wrists where the cuffs had been. Her neck was probably the same.

Belle's hands were fragile and small.

Resisting the urge to clench trembling fists was hard, but Ruby managed to keep herself under control and just focus on the feel of Belle's fingers and palms.

"We'll be out of here soon enough. I think Killian has a nice safe place for us that just isn't ready yet." Belle said, "I know it's hard, but try to ignore what they might be saying about you. Y-" There was this cut-off sound that came out of Belle like she was about to say something, but she stopped herself. Shrugging it off, Belle repeated, "We'll be out of here soon enough."

"Everything okay?" Tiana was at their table, the drinks and pancakes on a tray in her hands.

As Tiana served their meals, Belle let go of Ruby's hands to make room on the table. "We're okay, thanks for asking."

"My boss says your shake and iced tea are on the house." Tiana said.

Though Ruby had heard Tiana talking to her boss about giving their drinks for free, it still came as a surprise to have it actually happen for real. Belle was just as surprised as she stammered her thanks. Tiana just smiled and walked away to continue serving the other tables.

"Did you hear her talking to her manager about that?" Belle could barely keep her voice a whisper, excitement and shock rippling through her words as she dribbled syrup onto her pancake before passing the bottle to Ruby.

The syrup smelled sweet. Just the very scent of it made Ruby's mouth water. She remembered to nod in answer of Belle's question before taking the syrup and pouring so much of it on her pancakes that some of it already seeped out of the plate and onto the table.

Utensils.

Ruby looked down at the table and felt hit by how long ago she last got to use utensils.

It was different in her first few weeks? Months? In the facility, they initially gave her utensils to go with the ground meat they served her. After a while, they weren't always providing her with utensils and she found herself eating with her hands. Eventually, there were none at all and she just assumed it was part of some test or part of some new rule and she didn't really question it anymore.

She did ask the first time or two. They gave some reason that she had no choice but to accept.

And that became her reality. Eating mush with her hands, accepting food when it was given to her. The schedule of her meals never really felt regular, not that she had any way to measure the intervals. But she was almost sure that there were days when she was fed three meals and others when she just had two meals. Sometimes, she was pretty sure she only had a meal a day if at all. Especially when they tried to offer her raw meat.

That was the only offered meal she couldn't stomach.

As much as a part of her wanted to eat the raw meat, she couldn't let herself.

"Ruby?" Belle's voice cut through the subject's thoughts. She blinked herself back into the present, back to getting to look down at her soaked pancakes with the syrup all over the plate and table. "Are you okay?"

Taking the utensils with trembling hands, Ruby nodded.

She was free now. She was Ruby Lucas and she could have pancakes for breakfast.

The utensils just felt strange in her hands. Holding anything like this felt strange in her hands. Her fingers felt stiff and uncoordinated. Was the knife in the right hand or the left hand? And the fork? She switched the utensils a few times before settling for the knife in her right after seeing how Belle was doing it.

It took concentration and felt uncomfortable as Ruby fumbled with cutting the pancake. The knife kept slipping from her fingers and clattering onto the plate and the table. Her fork kept wobbling as she tried to cut her food. She was getting syrup all over her fingers and the table. Pieces of pancake were ending up on her lap.

Ruby found herself having to pick up the pieces from her thighs with growing frustration, eventually just grabbing fallen food with her hands and putting it in her mouth. The good food wasn't quite enough to counter her frustration. Flavor she hadn't tasted in a long time danced in her mouth, but the pit of her stomach weighed heavily with the reality that being human in the human world again wasn't going to be easy.

She could barely do any of these stupid _basic_ things.

"Would you like me to help?" Belle offered.

After attempting one more time to cut her food, only to drop her utensils and have them clatter to the floor, Ruby gave up and nodded.

How was she supposed to be human again and be part of the human world again if she couldn't even eat properly and behave properly? She felt like a disaster as Belle moved her chair closer to Ruby's side and began to cut the mangled remains of the pancake.

"What is wrong with her?"

"I've seen kids eat neater than that."

Ruby shook her head to block out the voices, but that didn't silence the doubtful thoughts running through her mind. She was a mess. A broken mess so deformed by Gold and everything else that eating like a human being was beyond her.

"It's okay." Belle said, seeming to read Ruby's thoughts while feeding Ruby. "After what they've done to you, there's a lot to relearn." Dabbing at Ruby's face with a napkin, Belle continued, "And I'm more than willing to help you. I'm sure Emma and Mulan and the others are willing to help, too."

Ruby just shrugged before accepting another bite of pancake.

"We're here for you." Belle said, "We'll help you."

* * *

After feeding a few more bites, Belle offered to let Ruby try again on her own, but she was too frustrated with herself and conscious of how much of a mess she'd made. Belle understood that getting the hang of motor skills like these again would take some time. Similar to learning how to use chopsticks after being so used to forks and knives. It just took time and practice and jelly fingers were just part of it.

Belle just wished Ruby didn't have to deal with so many people seeing the fumbles and judging them.

When they finished their meal, Belle asked for the bill. Tiana arrived still with a concerned look as she handed them more tissue together with the bill.

"Tiana?" Belle wasn't sure how much of a good idea this was, but it was worth a try.

"Yes?"

Chewing on her lip, Belle glanced to Ruby before focusing on Tiana. "Do you know where we might be able to spend the night?"

"Well…" Tiana tapped her pen against her lips. "Oh, there's the motel just outside of town, I think they accept cash but they require ID."

Belle wiped her hands on the tissue to distract herself from the worry that brought up. Without any ID, it was doubtful the motel would let them in, even if Belle gave all the pocket money from Aurora. And even if Belle _did_ have her ID's with her, using them would be a bad idea when they were trying not to be found my Gold and the police.

"If…" Tiana seemed to notice Belle's hesitation. "Uh… there's a women's shelter along Mulberry Street. I think it's called the Sisters of Saint Meissa Women's Shelter." The look Tiana gave them came off more like she was worried than suspicious. "I don't know much about them, but I think you have to be there by 5, maybe 4pm and that won't guarantee you a spot."

"Thank you." Belle said, already feeling like she was overstepping by asking questions. "Wait, is there a thrift store nearby?"

"There's a dollar store down the road."

"Thank you." Belle felt like she sounded repetitive, but she meant it. "Thank you so much."

They finished up paying the bill and headed down the road. It was a short enough walk for about five minutes when they finally came across the store that Tiana had indicated. Inside, there weren't a lot of clothes, though Belle did see a few stands with hats, gloves, glasses and scarves. She led the way there.

"Neal said a hat and glasses might help you blend in better," Belle went through the hats, letting Ruby try on a few before settling with a loose beanie.

A scruffy short man with a thick salt and pepper beard came lumbering over. "Properly put back the stuff you took out." He grumbled at them before continuing down to the counter.

"Yes, sir." Belle saw the name Leroy pinned to his chest.

Returning her attention to Ruby, Belle saw that it did help to give her a more casual look and drew attention away from her shaved head, but the scars riddling her face were still too loud. Maybe Neal was right and glasses would help draw attention away from that. There were several frames on display, a lot of them cheap plastic, a few small ones, a lot of big ones. Some didn't have lenses at all while others had what felt like plastic lenses and a few had real lenses with some grades.

Ruby tried on a few, scrunching her nose up every time. They finally settled on a pair of glasses that screamed _hipster_ , with big, thick black frames. Not used to the feel of them, Ruby fidgeted with them a lot.

The glasses were loud enough to distract from the scars, more or less. But there was still the scarring around her neck to deal with. Belle took a black scarf and wrapped it around Ruby's neck.

"I look… b-better?" Ruby asked.

Belle nodded. "I think we'll blend in a little better now." They moved towards Leroy to pay, until Belle noticed a newspaper on the counter. The headline read BEALFIRE FACILITY ATTACKED. With a subheading that read ESCAPED SUBJECTS AND KIDNAPPERS.

There was Emma's mugshot next to the pictures from Ruby and Regina's files. Ruby's picture showed her close-cropped hair, collar and hospital gown. Hopefully the altered look would make her less recognizable.

Pictures of Elinor, the triplets and Merida followed. Then below, there were pictures of Mulan, Aurora and Belle. Formal pictures taken probably from their files and applications.

Trying to be as subtle as possible, Belle took a rag from the counter and put it over the newspaper. After a moment of thought, she also took glasses for herself and a pair of scissors to add to their purchases. Leroy barely looked at them as he accepted the payment then continued to scroll through his phone.

Once they were out, Belle wondered where she could freshen up. A part of her was pretty sure it would be overstepping to go back to the diner, but she felt so unfamiliar with the area that Tiana and the diner felt like a home base.

They could always order something else if they had to. Although Belle was already full and wasn't sure if she could stomach anything else.

"Ruby, would you mind if we went back to the diner?" Belle asked.

Ruby tilted her head to one side. "Why?"

"I just want to freshen up after that long night." It was hard to think of their options when Belle still hadn't had any sleep and barely any rest. The drive had been too stressful for anyone to really fall asleep and at the time they were all still pretty high off of the adrenaline.

But now, with a full stomach, a long night and a long day behind her and ahead of her, Belle was _drained_.

Ruby scrunched up her nose and adjusted her glasses. "Okay."

Did the glasses even really work? Belle had just hoped it would be enough to alter their appearances a little bit. Enough to keep people from immediately recognizing them. Hopefully.

It worked in movies, didn't it?

Hopefully it worked in real life too. If Clark Kent could hide the whole Superman thing this way, maybe they could make it work too.

Belle was pretty sure sleep deprived logic wasn't sound logic but didn't want to bother questioning herself.

The walk back to the diner wasn't any longer than before, but it felt longer as Belle felt her energy dwindling.

"Oh," Tiana's eyebrows shot upwards as they came in. "Welcome back!" The breakfast rush had wound down and there were less people now.

"Hi, would you mind if we use your bathroom?" Belle wondered if it was a bad sign or not that Tiana, having only met them this morning, still recognized them.

Tiana gestured towards a door." Sure, it's right over there."

Smiling at Tiana, Belle turned to Ruby and squeezed her hand. "I won't be too long. Will you be okay waiting?"

Shifting her weight from one foot to the other, Ruby looked around warily, adjusted her glasses then finally nodded.

"Thanks." Belle gave Ruby's hands one more squeeze then headed for the bathroom.

There, Belle got to have a good look at herself in the mirror for the first time in… she wasn't even sure how long ago the last time was. Maybe before the first escape's failure.

The sight in front of her was strange. She had lost a significant amount of weight, probably in part from the stress and probably also from the controlled rations she was given when she was in captivity. Maybe she would have gotten even thinner if she had been Gold's prisoner even longer.

It crossed her mind how different Ruby, Emma and Merida would have looked if they hadn't spent the time they had in Baelfire. Since, the pre-facility pictures they had were of much younger people, using that as a reference for how they might look under different circumstances wasn't quite accurate. Ruby would probably still have her defined jaw and cheekbones, but her eyes probably wouldn't be so sunken and her cheeks wouldn't be so hollow and her neck wouldn't be so thin.

And her ribs wouldn't be so sharp and defined. Belle shuddered at the thought of Ruby's scarred, emaciated body.

"Okay." Belle breathed out to ground herself and push back the train of thought. She had to get herself focused. She removed the glasses and put it down on the side of the sink.

Her eyes were sunken too, deep into dark circles. There were several bruises on her face and her lip was still puffy with a thin cut. Looking down at her palms, Belle saw that though the wounds were closed, there were scars across the skin from where Gold's knife had dug in.

It wasn't anywhere near as bad as Ruby's, but Belle still had trouble acknowledging those hands as hers.

Regina had expelled so much energy on the major emergency injuries of Mulan's mangled hand, bullet wounds on Emma's leg and Regina's own shoulder, and Belle's cut up palms. There were a lot of other injuries Regina had to attend to on Mulan as well. After pestering, mostly from Aurora, they found out she had been forcing herself to move on a sprained ankle.

Mulan's hand though. It was really something. Regina hadn't fully healed it yet when they went separate ways. Despite her best efforts, she was drained and the damage was severe. Mulan hadn't regained full mobility yet and the hand was still very swollen, but at least the wound was closed despite being scarred, and Regina claimed she was able to repair the splintered bones and a number of the nerves.

And Belle was getting sidetracked again.

She had to get this over with. Belle washed her face to reset herself, then got ready for the task at hand.

With shaky hands, Belle took out the scissors she'd bought from Leroy and brought it up close to her face. She didn't know what she was doing. She just knew that the farther she looked from the picture being broadcast of herself, the better.

It was harder than the movies made it look. Hair would get caught on the blades of the scissors. Strands wouldn't cut evenly and would look awkward once she let go. The back of her neck itched like hell as she snipped her way through her hair until she was finally left with a crude haircut that could barely pass for some kind of bob.

With a smirk, Belle thought of the bisexual haircut meme.

Until she realized she probably didn't look anywhere near as fierce and confident as the characters in that meme. She just looked like a skinny, short person who had no idea what she was doing.

Belle sighed as she set about cleaning up the mess she'd made, not wanting to give Tiana and her coworkers more work to do than necessary. It was hard getting as many of the lose strands as she could and dump them in the bin. Her neck still itched no matter how much she pawed at the lose hair that managed to still be somewhere there. She was pretty sure some of it had wormed its way down the back of her shirt.

Eventually, Belle gave up, put her glasses back on and washed her hands before heading out to find Tiana talking to Ruby.

"Have you been on the run long?" Tiana asked, "Or is he close by? Whoever you're hiding from?"

Ruby squirmed, fidgeting with her glasses, shrugged.

"Oh," Tiana turned to look at Belle. " _Oh_."

"I cleaned up my mess as much as I could, I promise." Belle felt panic rising in her throat. "There's still some hair I think, but most of it is in the trash bin."

Tiana's open mouth snapped shut and she adjusted herself. "Yeah. Sure. That's fine. I'll clean it up later." She bit her bottom lip and hesitated a moment, then spoke again, "I… I hope he doesn't find you, whoever hurt you two."

"I hope so too." Belle had a feeling Tiana assumed they were hiding from abusive parents or partners and though that wasn't the truth, it was a good enough cover story to go with.

Until she saw the televison on the diner starting to flash a report on the escaped subjects of Baelfire Research Center.

Belle hoped Tiana wasn't going to turn around anytime soon. Instead though, she shifted her weight again then handed a napkin over to Belle. "If you have trouble finding a place to stay the night, you can give me a call."

Surprise fired through Belle and for a moment she could only stare at Tiana, mouth agape.

"My place is really small." Tiana spoke quickly, "It's barely enough to fit me, but…" She took a tray from the counter. "But I want to help. Now, I'm sorry to end this short, but I have to start cleaning up before my boss kills me. I hope you two have a good day. Stay safe."

The news report on screen was showing footage of the facility and some shots of the truck they got away in. Belle hurriedly thanked Tiana, took Ruby's hand and left the diner. It was hard to say if Tiana would still trust them if she saw the news.

But at least they could maybe call her as a last resort or backup plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY NOT SORRY I KEEP CHANGING THE APPEARANCES OF OUR BABIES. I wanted Belle to pull a Kimberly because wHY NOT
> 
> I'm not sure if I can update within this week. I have a LOT of other overdue stuff. There's a client I've been neglecting and I really need to start drawing her stuff again. And the money is always nice to have. So yeah. I'll try to update early next week since I'm kind of back into the groove of things, I think it won't take so long this time. HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND.


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took longer than anticipated, and there are some parts I'm not sure about but there are a couple of scenes in here I feel pretty pumped about!

As much as Tiana's heart was probably in the right place, with how she asked questions and offered her number and her home as an option, Ruby still couldn't help but wonder if this was all still some sort of test. Maybe Tiana was luring them into a trap and planning to take them to Dr. Gold the moment they got comfortable or fell asleep. Maybe Tiana was testing them with her questions and looks of concern to see if they were hiding anything.

Maybe everything here right now was just an elaborate test and Dr. Gold was just waiting behind that wall up ahead. He could just be biding his time and getting ready to come out and say the test was over and she had to go back to her room and put her collar and cuffs back on.

Maybe this was all just some dream.

What if she woke up back in her room? Back with the collar and cuffs and the solid walls and bright lights and greys and blacks and whites everywhere?

"Ruby, wait." The subject didn't know if she would be able to handle waking up back at the facility. Didn't know if she would still be able to go through the tests all over again. "Ruby, please."

Looking over her shoulder, the subject checked to see if anyone was following, ready to leap upon them and shock them with the prods until they were subdued.

" _Ruby_."

The subject realized they'd stopped walking and Belle was looking at her. "Ruby, you're hurting my hand."

Guilt blasted through the subject as she let go of Belle's hand and recoiled. The sight of Belle now, it hit the subject like one of Gold's prods. A blow to the jaw and a jab into the stomach. It _hurt_ , seeing how Belle had to alter her appearance to minimize their chances of being recognized. How Belle was thinner now after she had to spend time as a prisoner in the facility. How she had bruises on her face and a cut on her lip from Gold's abuse.

Belle's whole life, from her home to her very appearance was taken away from her because of the subject.

"I'm sorry." She gasped, horrified by how much of Belle's life had been ruined. On top of that she almost had her hand crushed. The subject was a monster. More apologies caught in her throat as she tried to let them out. She choked on them and mutely opened and closed her mouth.

"Ruby, hey," Belle stepped forward and clasped the subject's hands, "It's okay, take it easy."

"N-no.." Was the only word the subject managed to gasp out. "No." She shook her head, halfheartedly tried to pull away, but also unable to deny that she found strength and comfort in their contact with each other.

"It's okay." Belle repeated. "You stopped. My hand is fine. I'm fine. I'm okay."

There was still a mess of thoughts and emotions running through the subject's mind that she couldn't quite express. She still felt like the struggles Belle had gone through weren't worth it for the subject. Just some murderous creature.

But she couldn't help but latch onto the comfort of their clasped hands. "You're… okay?" She just had to be more careful and more gentle. Much _much_ more gentle.

"Yeah." Belle said, "Ruby, I'm okay. Let's keep walking?"

Sighing, the subject reminded herself that she was supposed to be Ruby now. She was outside now and she wasn't going to be waking up back in the facility and this wasn't all some elaborate test. This was freedom. This was outside. The sky was bright and blue and beautiful. It was starting to get cloudy, but it was still beautiful. Still vast and endless, blue and wide.

"Okay."

They started to walk again, Belle leading the way since she seemed to have some memory of where Tiana said the shelter would be. As they made their way there, Ruby found herself starting to feel tired as the weight of the past few days latched onto her body. The full moon had just passed and though she'd eaten her fill this morning, she was still drained and still needed to sleep to be able to really recharge.

Belle meanwhile was obviously exhausted, even if she tried to hide it and keep her head up.

"Do… you like… it?" Ruby asked, touching Belle's hair.

Shrugging, Belle continued to walk, "It'll take some getting used to, but yeah… I guess I like it."

"Sorry that…" Ruby licked her lips as her throat started to tighten up again and trap the words, "…you… had to d-do… that."

With a dismissive flick of her hand, Belle shook her head, "It's nothing, Ruby. Not a big deal."

There were still so many more words Ruby wish she could say, but it was like she'd run out of them and couldn't get them out anymore. It just settled heavily in her stomach until she gave up and just nodded, though guilt still swirled through her mind.

As they continued to walk, growing steadily more tired, Ruby could see that Belle was reaching her limits. There was a slump to her shoulders and a drag to her feet. If Ruby, with her heightened stamina and endurance, was starting to tire, Belle was definitely exhausted.

By the time the shelter came into view, a crowd was already starting to gather outside. The sight of so many people clumped together -in different clothes, varying from shabby to composed- was surreal to Ruby. It almost scared her to be near the crowd as they drew closer. The different scents wafted over to her, hair gel and hair spray on some who were probably a little luckier, unwashed hair for others. Body odor came from some, deodorant from others.

Most of the crowd composed of women, many of them with children. A few men were there but seemed to be leaving the crowd.

Ruby found herself feeling nervous as they reached the outside of the shelter. Her heart started to beat faster than it should and she had to remind herself not to squeeze Belle's hand too hard.

Adjusting her glasses, Ruby tried instead to focus on breathing in and out through her mouth. Slowly and deeply. It helped ground her while Belle looked for who they were supposed to talk to. The crowd seemed to be broken into smaller circles. As Ruby and Belle worked their way through, they found nuns at the center of the circles, taking the names of those hoping to spend the night at their shelter.

"Excuse me," Belle said, reaching the closest nun and trying to get her attention. "Do you still have room for two more?"

"We're getting very full," The nun answered, "This is for the waitlist now. May I have your names?"

"Lacey." Belle spoke quickly, "Lacey de Ravin and…" She glanced at Ruby. "Red… Ory."

The nun nodded, "Just wait, we'll be calling names in about an hour."

Several women groaned and whined about the wait, a few tried to reason out with the nun as she ignored them and made her way through to get back to the building.

With Belle starting to slump against Ruby, it was her turn to lead the way through the crowd until they found a spot of sidewalk just at the edge of the block. She helped sit Belle down before joining her.

"In hindsight…" Belle said, "Scarlet probably would have made more sense than just… _Red_."

Ruby shrugged, not sure if she was supposed to be amused by Belle's mistake or reassure her for still being quick enough on her feet to make up names for them on the spot.

Belle smiled to herself but it looked hollow while her eyes looked drained. "They were kind of just the first names to come to mind." She leaned against Ruby. "I have doubts about this working out. We're screwed if they want to confirm our identities."

What if the nuns got suspicious and called authorities? The thought of ending up back at the facility crossed Ruby's mind once more, making her already uneasy heart beat even faster. She scratched at her head before readjusting the beanie.

"We need a backup plan other than Tiana." Belle pinched the bridge of her nose. "But I just keep coming up blank."

Nothing was coming to Ruby's mind either. She still couldn't quite believe this was real. The fear of waking up in her room was still too vivid.

"I wonder if we should get dinner." Belle rested her head on Ruby's shoulder. "I'm starting to get hungry again."

The hollowness in Ruby's stomach told her she was getting hungry again too. But if they left the area to find food, they might miss out on their chance to sleep at the shelter tonight. They should probably just stay and hope for the best.

Belle's train of thought seemed to go a similar way since she said, "Maybe not. Let's just wait here, yeah?"

"Yeah."

So they waited, slumped against each other as they sat on the sidewalk.

* * *

Urgent tapping at her shoulder roused Belle from sleep she hadn't realized she'd taken. Through bleary eyes, she looked up to Ruby's distressed expression and followed it to police cars pulling up in front of the shelter, just at the edge of the crowd.

"Looking for us." Ruby whispered.

That was enough to know that they had to go somewhere else. Belle adjusted glasses that had gone askew during her nap before taking Ruby's hand and working their way through the crowd and into an alley. They got behind the shelter and down a block or so before reaching a chain link fence. Through it, they could see fields dotted with small houses. The fence was climbable in theory, but the barbed wire at the top would prove to be a problem.

"Belle." Ruby presented her back, "I'll carry you."

Glancing over her shoulder, Belle didn't see anyone going after them yet, but she thought she could hear voices over a speaker or megaphone. She wasn't sure but she vaguely heard her name and a mention of Baelfire.

It might not be long before someone observant recognizes their faces even with the precautions Belle tried to take. Returning her attention to Ruby, Belle clambered up her back, linking her arms around Ruby's neck and legs around her thin waist.

Once she was content with Belle being as secure as could be, Ruby took a few steps back. She focused on the fence, breathed in deeply, and started to charge forward.

For a moment, Belle feared they were going to fall short, but Ruby didn't disappoint. When she jumped, she easily cleared the fence and landed lightly on her feet a good couple of meters away. Without breaking her stride, Ruby kept going, running down the path.

There were moments when she would run on all fours, only to catch herself and start running upright again.

Though she was starting to breathe heavily, Ruby hadn't slowed down yet. Meanwhile, Belle was getting stiff and sore from hanging on.

It was starting to get dark as the sun began to set. The gathering clouds in the sky didn't look like good news either. Belle eyed their surroundings until she noticed an area with overgrown foliage. She indicated the area to Ruby, who turned sharply and started running there. As they drew closer, more of the area looked like it hadn't been tended to in a long time. There was hardly a path to it and Ruby ended up just powering through the tall plants.

"You can let me down." Belle said as they started to near a small house with a tattered roof, dilapidated walls and boarded up windows. The door had also been boarded up, though good chunks of it had been eaten away by termites, probably rats too.

As Ruby let Belle down, she felt her muscles crying out. She had to stiffly shake life back into them. It didn't help much because Belle found herself so tired and sore she could hardly lift her hands. But she knew she had to. They had to figure out a new plan. Trying not to wince visibly, Belle adjusted her glasses and brushed her fingers through her hair, surprised still to find the strands ending so abruptly.

"Nobody here." Ruby said, sniffing the air. "Abandoned."

Though going back to the diner and getting in contact with Tiana was a thought drifting through Belle's mind, she didn't feel inclined to involve Tiana and put her in danger. Given the measures Gold was willing to go to keep control of whoever he considered his possessions, Belle wouldn't even dare imagine what he might do to any of them or anyone who helped them if they ever got caught.

"How much trouble do you think we'd get into if we got caught squatting in there?" Belle asked.

Ruby shrugged.

Belle started to walk around the house to see if there might be another way to get inside. "Maybe not as much as if police caught us in the shelter and thought the nuns were purposely hiding us." That was another set of images she'd rather not dwell on. "Or if they found us at Tiana's." Again, not something she wanted to imagine.

They found a part of the house where the wall had started to collapse, leaving a hole Belle and Ruby could probably climb through. Inside, it looked dusty and grimy, with bits of the wall and ceiling all over a floor littered with animal droppings.

Droplets of rain starting to fall on them seemed as good a sign as any that this was where they would have to spend the night.

Belle gingerly made her way through the hole, scraping her hands and arms against splinters and nails. Wood and debris cracked and crunched underfoot as she went deeper into the house. Behind her, she heard Ruby working her way in, hissing when she scraped her skin.

At least Ruby would be able to easily heal. Belle wasn't as lucky, but after a quick inspection of her hands and arms, she figured maybe she was at least _slightly_ lucky. The scrapes were mild since her jacket sleeves for the most part protected her skin. Only a few shallow scratches actually opened, but they weren't deep enough to worry about bleeding out.

Whether or not they were going to get infected was another story.

Rain starting to fall through the holes in the ceiling called Belle's attention back to the present. Scurrying sounds moved from one part of the room to another as any rats that had made their home here avoided their intruders. If they could just find a spot that wasn't going to be soaked or rat-invested, then they would be okay for the night.

But that was easier said than done.

They combed through the house as the rain continued to pour. Water was starting to pool on the floor in some areas and Belle was getting tired and frustrated. The living room was the most dry area, with the least holes in the ceiling. While Belle cleared away some of the debris, Ruby wedged an old door against the hole in the wall. It would keep out some of the wind and rain and also hopefully deter anyone else who might want to come in here and stay here.

"Sorry." Ruby finished up wedging the door.

Without a broom and proper materials to clear away the debris, Belle had settled with moving some away with her hand while others got swept aside by her feet. "What do you mean?"

Ruby wrung her hands together before crouching down and joining Belle. "Everything."

"Ruby?" Belle looked up. "What's this about?"

She was swallowing and licking her lips as she tried to give words to her thoughts. Belle knew better than to pressure Ruby to speak. "Take your time finding the words."

There was a slump to Ruby's shoulders as she picked up and put away broken glass. "This." Avoiding eye contact, Ruby continued to speak. "All… _this_."

"Ruby, it's okay." Though Ruby wasn't expressing herself clearly, Belle had a feeling this was about every hardship they'd gone through in the past couple of weeks, from learning about Ruby to the hard-hitting reality of her life to the fight to free her to the failure of their first escape attempt to the casualties of the second attempt and now to the stress and fear that came with being in hiding. "We'll get through this and it'll be worth it in the end."

"But…" Ruby turned to look at Belle. "You… got hurt."

"I don't heal as fast as you do, but I still heal." Belle tried to keep her tone light in the hope of cheering Ruby up. "And we have a Regina to help speed up our healing."

Ruby just shook her head and after that didn't seem keen on speaking anymore.

As it got darker and colder, they finished up clearing a space on the floor where they could attempt to get some rest.

Even with her heightened abilities, Ruby was clearly reaching her limits. She heavily flopped onto the floor and pulled out her hat and glasses, leaving them on top of a worn down coffee table with broken legs.

"We'll be okay." Belle said, as much to herself as to Ruby, who was rubbing at her shorn hair and wiping at her tired eyes. She yawned and nodded. She also seemed to be nodding off. Though there were still leftover negativity hanging in the air between them from the unresolved feelings Ruby couldn't properly express, Belle hoped things would feel better after some sleep.

She positioned herself against the wall, sitting with her legs crossed before gesturing for Ruby to come closer. It surprisingly didn't take much to convince her to lie down with her head in Belle's lap. Within minutes, the relaxed breathing and limp body showed that Ruby had fallen asleep. Hopefully things really _would_ be better after some sleep. Maybe Ruby was just tired and it kicked up negative thoughts. Maybe she was going to wake up feeling better.

Maybe that could also be the case for Belle.

But as much as she tried to doze off too, she couldn't help but entertain nagging worries of how everything could go wrong. Maybe it hadn't been a good idea to split up. What if the others had been discovered? What if they hadn't been as lucky at staying hidden? What if they failed to find a place to sleep? What if they were being held in cells at a police station, waiting to be transported back to the facility? What if Killian's plan failed and he had been caught?

Without any way of contacting each other, it was impossible to know what was going on. They were dependent on Aurora's ability to find them and reach them tomorrow and as much as Belle wanted to believe in the best, it was hard after seeing things go so tragically wrong. Knowing how desperate Gold must be to get them back, Belle wondered if they could ever be safe again.

* * *

It was bright and her skin felt raw from the collar and the cuffs.

Some of her memories were a blur, but not all of them. She still kept getting blasted by images of Dorothy's body buried in the bookshelf, Merida bleeding from bites and scratches, Mr. Spencer torn to shreds, classmates all over the floor, knocked around by her claws.

Trembling as she rocked back and forth on the stiff bed, Subject 204 pressed her hands against her eyes, trying to stifle her sobs and keep herself quiet.

She was a monster.

_Ruby Lucas was dead._

Subject 204 was a monster.

That's who she was now. _What_ she was now. She was the subject, and this facility, whatever it was, could do whatever it wanted to her after what she did to her friends, to her classmates, to her teacher, to _Peter_. The subject was a disgrace and not even Mother could fix the mess that happened.

If the subject had just listened to her mother and been a better daughter, then things would be different.

Maybe Peter would still be alive. Dorothy might still be alive. Everyone in that classroom might still be alive.

And the subject wouldn't be here in this small room, cuffs and a collar burning her skin, chains hooked up to her bed. A reinforced door with a guard posted outside. Countless layers of security kept her from the outside world of humans she could so easily kill with a swing of her hand.

This was where she belonged.

This was what she deserved.

And yet, she felt terrified. She didn't know what they were going to do to her. Didn't know how much their tests would hurt her, how much their tests would change her. If their tests would actually be able to cure her.

Would it be anything like their doctor games in the basement? Whatever the doctor games were. The subject couldn't remember how those were done anymore. She could vaguely recall chains like this one, and a scent that made her dizzy and sleepy but it soothed the headaches somehow.

And the dogs. She remembered the big dogs.

It was so hard to remember.

And so hard to ground herself.

She felt scared. She knew she killed people and she knew she deserved to be chained up and put through tests of all sorts, maybe even dissected and cut up. She knew she deserved pain and punishment, but she couldn't help feeling terrified.

On top of all of that was the guilt and pain of her murders.

The sobs were getting harder and harder to stifle as her chest tightened up and her throat clenched itself inwards. It was hard to breathe through the tears and the tightness. She wanted to disappear. To be just wiped out from this existence.

Death sounded nice right about now.

But she didn't deserve that, did she? After what she'd done? After she mauled Peter until he was just mush on the gravel and concrete? Death was probably too quick for the subject, too much of an ending to someone who deserved to be punished.

She felt awful, horrible, pained, distressed, guilty, scared…

Sad.

Very sad.

It _hurt_.

The door started opening. She stiffened, hurried to wipe her eyes, shuffled to the corner of her bed, curled into herself, struggled to fight back more sobs that threatened to wrench out of her. Attempts to apologize for her noise and hassle caught in her throat as another sob worked itself out of her.

Ruby sniffled and wiped her arm across her face, only to feel something in herself shatter all the more as it hit her all over again how she wasn't supposed to be Ruby Lucas anymore. She was a nobody. An inhuman creature. A murderer. A _monster_.

"Now, now, dearie, what's all this?" It was Dr. Gold's voice that greeted her, which was a relief. The subject wasn't sure how a guard would have responded to her. She didn't know how the guards were supposed to treat her. She just knew they kept her in cuffs and this collar. They marched her down the hallways and into this room with the bed against the wall. The metal slab with a thin cushion. No blankets, no pillows.

This was her room now.

The tears wouldn't stop flowing out no matter how hard she fought to stop them. She wiped at her face and sniffled. It just hurt so much, this heavy, sharp, stabbing pain that started in her chest and weighed her down and made her want to sink to the floor and hide under her bed.

"You're probably still adjusting, I gather." Dr. Gold had pulled up a chair and was sitting close to her bed. It was dangerous for him to be so near and she feared she would hurt him. "And that's fine, dearie."

"What…" Her voice was soft and croaky as the words worked their way out of her constricted chest and throat. "What's going to happen to me?" There was a wobble to her question but she managed to ask it without her voice breaking into sobs.

Still, it was hard not to.

She pressed her palms against her face and leaned her head back against the wall. Breathing through her mouth, she tried to just focus on inhaling and exhaling, but it just devolved into tight sobs again. A few whimpers managed to work their way out of her.

"204," Dr. Gold reached over and put a hand on her shoulder. "We're here to help."

"How?" Scrubbing her face with her hands, the subject choked back a whimper and turned to look at Dr. Gold, chin stiff, lip trembling. "How? How can I be… fixed?"

"We have to run some tests first," Dr. Gold squeezed her shoulder then sat back down on his chair. "These tests will vary but the idea will be to gain a better understanding of your condition, get a scope of your abilities and see how we can narrow that down until we can eliminate the dichotomy altogether."

The words he used were confusing and she wasn't sure she understood.

Dr. Gold clasped his hands together, "Basically, we need to run tests to understand your condition. Once we understand it, we can work to treat it. Do you understand, dearie?"

She nodded.

A smile spread over Dr. Gold's face, "That's good. Now all we'll need is your cooperation. Do as your told and the tests will run more smoothly and the cure will come along more quickly. Will you be able to do that? Cooperate?"

Knowing there was nothing she had left and nothing else she could do, she nodded again. "Yes. I promise."

"Thank you." Dr. Gold's smile widened further, his golden teeth gleaming. He leaned forward and clasped her hands. "There's no need to worry, dearie. You're under our care now."

It was still hard to breathe without sobbing, but she managed to let out a shaky exhale as she squeezed his hands. "Yeah."

Dr. Gold's hands squeezed back. "We have the means to make sure you don't hurt anyone anymore."

"Yeah…" She sniffed, "I don't… I d-don't want to hurt anyone…" another sob broke through her sentence, "…anymore."

"We'll help you with that." Dr. Gold promised. "We'll do everything we can to cure you. That, I can promise you, dearie."

With eyes still blurred from tears, she looked at him. Her voice was still unsteady, but she was able to say the words she owed him. "T-thank you." It was the least she could do. She didn't deserve to be saved or cured. But here he was, promising to help cure her.

That was more than she deserved.

* * *

Belle abruptly awoke to sharp pains in her arm. With her mind still in a half-dazed fog, she managed to process that the pain came from Ruby digging her claws into Belle's arm.

And whimpering.

There was tension in Ruby's body as she curled up, her face contorted into a look of pain and distress.

"Ruby, hey." Belle breathed through the pain of Ruby's claws, thankful for the thick layer of jacket sleeve protecting skin from being ripped open. "Wake up, it's just a dream."

It took a bit of shaking to rouse Ruby, and for a moment, she looked around, trying to ground herself in her surroundings.

"Ruby," Belle tried to keep her voice even but it came out in a hiss. "My arm."

With a gasp, Ruby released Belle's arm and crawled backwards, looking horrified.

"It's okay," Belle tried to reassure her, "I'm not hurt, it's fine."

Ruby just shook her head and moved herself farther away.

"Ruby…" Belle massaged the life back into her arm, tried to be subtle about how much it had hurt, but she probably failed at that since Ruby followed the movement with a pained expression. "I'm okay, I promise."

As she shook her head, Ruby's eyes seemed to glow yellow as the frustration started building up again. "You're not." She bared her teeth and run her hands through her hair. "You're…" She struggled to find the words, gesturing for them in the air before turning to Belle, "You should be…"

With a groan that sounded almost low enough to be a growl, Ruby rubbed at her head. " _Happy_!" The flailing hands started to slow until they were instead clenched into fists close to Ruby's chest. " _Safe_. Home. Not…"

Even in the darkness of the night, Belle could see how tightly clenched Ruby's fists were, and it worried her.

Belle wanted to interrupt and try to say something, but she stopped herself. This was a nagging thought on Ruby's mind and she wanted to express it even if finding the words was a struggle.

"Not _starving_. N-not… hurt." She sighed, slumping her shoulders and letting her hands fall to the floor next to her ankles. "Not _here_. Not… stuck with… the subject."

Her lip was trembling as she continued to speak. "Subject should be…" Ruby took a shaky breath. "…back… with Dr. Gold."

She brought her hands back up and crossed them over her knees before burying her face into them. The last few words were a soft whisper Belle had to strain to hear through the rain. "I'm not worth it."

"That's not true." Belle had to keep her voice even, raising it just because she felt strongly about this might only add to Ruby's anxiety. "You're _worth_ all of this. All the stuff we're going through to give you freedom and happiness."

Though Ruby was shaking her head again, Belle kept going. "I don't know how things are going to go from here on out, but I _do_ know that you deserve to be happy and free."

"Subject," Ruby's head was still pressed against her folded arms and her hands were curling into fists again. "…is a _monster_."

Belle inched closer to Ruby. "You made a mistake, that's a fact none of us are going to change." It was a terrible mistake that cost peoples' lives. Several of them even were just teenagers who could have had long lives ahead of them. And Merida. That was a slippery slope so steep it basically caused a whole avalanche.

Still, this wasn't about that. This wasn't a game of who Ruby hurt most and how bad of a creature Ruby was.

"You don't have to be punished for all eternity for that." Belle continued. "Your life still has value."

When Ruby lifted her head from her arms, Belle hoped that maybe it meant she was getting through. Instead, Ruby shook her head, and in a broken voice, said, "No."

"Fine, if not to you, then to _me_." As she said it, Belle knew that whatever anyone thought, whatever Ruby herself thought, there was value to this frightened person who was just a shell of who she used to be and who she could be. And no matter what it was going to take, Belle was going to help Ruby get there. "I'm here for you."

Ruby's eyes weren't glowing yellow anymore, but in the dim light, Belle could she how they shone with unshed tears. "Why?"

"There's so much more to you than what Gold tried to break you into." Belle said, "Than what your whole past broke you into."

The look on Ruby's face showed she was unconvinced.

Running her hands through her hair, still not used to how abruptly it ended before her shoulders, Belle tried again. "I made a commitment to be here for you and I'm going to see this through."

Ruby's brow furrowed.

"And I don't care if that means helping you relearn how to eat with utensils again," It still stabbed at Belle's heart to see how much Ruby's captivity had taken away from her. "Helping you learn how to read again. How to write again." She hadn't missed the way Ruby looked overwhelmed by the menu and settled for pointing at the pictures.

And Belle also wasn't going to forget the other little things that Ruby lost the dexterity and skill for. "I'll help you relearn how to dress yourself again," She gestured at Ruby, "How to brush your hair if it grows out if you want to grow it out." Thinking of things off the top of her head, Belle kept going, "How to cut your nails other than biting or breaking them, how to talk to people, how to buy food."

With a laugh, Belle found herself adding, "Fuck, I'll even teach you how to _drive_ so you don't end up like fucking _Aurora_."

Ruby raised an eyebrow at that and looked like a ghost of a smile was pulling at her lips.

"Look, don't get me wrong. I love her and she's a great person and a great friend." Belle let another bubble of laughter pop out of her before she continued, "But she can't drive for shit." Though Belle really wasn't one for swearing a lot, it felt good to let it through every so often. Like now.

"Ruby, I'm going to help you be the best fucking driver on the planet so you can go wherever the hell you want."

Realizing she was starting to raise her voice, Belle tried to regain her composure, but her heightened sense of excitement still came through, "I want you to be able to go wherever you want. _Anywhere_."

As she started to reach the peak of her excitement, Belle felt herself toppling over as a realization hit her. "With or without me."

And the thought of being without Ruby hit Belle harder than she could have imagined or expected. After spending so much time and energy focused on learning about Ruby and planning to set her free, the thought of being apart from her was jarring. There was just this deep pain to imagining a reality without working on something that had something to do with Ruby. A reality where Ruby could stand on her own.

But that was also a reality that Belle wanted more than anything. A reality that Ruby _deserved_ more than anything.

"I want you to be able to stand without me, because Gold took that away from you." Belle said, looking Ruby in the eye and seeing a confused mess of emotions in those green depths. "I want you to be _you_."

Ruby's brow furrowed. "Me?"

"You." Belle repeated. "Not Subject 204. Not Gold's Ruby or your mother's Ruby or even…" Stumbling over saying it, Belle knew she had to. "Not even… well… _my_ Ruby."

The expression on Ruby's face was hard to read, but she didn't look like she was trying to speak, so Belle kept going. "I want you to be your Ruby. _Ruby's_ Ruby."

"Ruby's Ruby?"

Belle nodded. "Yeah. Then… then you can decide for yourself if you want to be with anyone." A part of Belle felt strange about the thought of Ruby being with anyone. It sickened her to imagine some guy trying to control Ruby's life all over again and manipulating her and owning her.

If it ever came to that, Belle knew that she was going to protect Ruby and keep anyone like that from breaking her down again.

"I mean yeah, when… you're ready. I guess." Belle tried to hide the cringe she felt at the thought of being the kind of person who would try to screen anyone trying to date Ruby. That was… weird. And wrong. And totally went against the whole concept of Ruby learning to be her own person. "I don't know. Just… I just…"

Belle leaned her head back and sighed. "I Just want you to be the person you have the potential to be. The person you could have been if this shit storm never hit you."

"Really?" Ruby's voice was soft, but heavy with emotion. Heavy with the weight of everything Belle had just said.

"That's all I want for you." Belle said. "That's-"

A hand clamped over Belle's mouth. It happened so fast, that it took some moment of processing her surroundings for Belle to realize it was Ruby's hand and Ruby who was pressed up close.

"Someone outside," was Ruby's whispered explanation.

Though Belle could hardly hear anything through the wind and rain, she trusted Ruby's senses and nodded. They both moved as quietly as they could, retrieving their accessories and starting to inch their way deeper into the house and away from the road.

Belle could see a flashlight moving around outside and she did start to hear the footsteps as well. Ruby crouched down in the kitchen and pressed herself against the wall. Belle followed suit. They waited for the person to pass.

But he didn't.

His flashlight shown through one of the boarded up windows. "I know you're in there. Your tracks are all over the place."

Belle exchanged a glance with Ruby.

"Now you'd better come out of there because you're trespassing." It was a man's voice. "Don't make me charge you for resisting arrest, too."

 _Shit_.

Looking over at Ruby, Belle hoped one of them could come up with a plan to get out of this situation safely.

The echoing bang of a gunshot filled Belle's ears, and she saw that Ruby panicked, hurrying back towards the room with the hole they came in through. Belle followed after her, only for them both to find themselves in front of the door that Ruby had wedged against the wall.

Another several gun shots rang in her ears, almost drowning out the rain.

They both ducked down, but Belle felt a rush of emotion she couldn't quite place.

This wasn't how things were supposed to turn out. Couldn't the universe at least cut them some slack for once in their lives? The stray thought surprised Belle as she backed away from where the cop was trying to get in.

There was a banging sound as the he kicked the door backwards and worked his way through the hole in the wall.

It was a tighter fit for a big man with broad shoulders and massive arms, but a warning shot from his gun just barely missed Ruby and they knew better than to try bolting while he forced his way through.

"Keep your hands up or the next bullet is through one of your skulls." The aggression to his approach would have made Belle doubt if he was actually a cop, but the uniform he wore made Belle pause. That and what she could make out as a police car's lights along the road.

By the time the cop made his way through, he pointed his gun and his flashlight at them.

The beam shone too brightly in their faces. Belle squinted against it and felt anger boiling deep within her. It was a strong, burning feeling that surprised her. Frustration was bubbling up instead of fear at the sight of a gun pointed at them and a flashlight blinding them.

Ruby, with her hands still up, started to move in front of Belle, in an effort to protect her in case the cop fired his gun again.

[ ](http://konako.tumblr.com/post/161716717326)

"DON'T MOVE!" The cop noticed, his finger dangerously close to pulling the trigger again.

There was a hitch to Ruby's breath, but she reluctantly stopped moving.

Belle didn't want Ruby to get hurt again. Didn't want them to go through even worse shit than they were already in. Didn't want Ruby to end up back in that facility all over again. Didn't want Gold to undo what little progress they'd already started to make. Didn't want Ruby to once again go back to being Gold's favorite little Subject 204.

Squinting at the light, Belle could vaguely make out a heavy jaw, a hooked nose and a thin mustache. She gritted her teeth and bit back a string of retorts, worked on composing herself first.

"We just needed a place to stay." Belle managed to keep her voice soft, scared. Hiding the burning frustration she was feeling instead. "We mean no harm. We'll leave now."

Another gunshot made Belle's heart skip a beat.

"Shut up or I'm placing one between your eyes." The cop growled, keeping the flashlight and gun pointed at them.

His aggression and the dangerous way he handled his gun made Belle furious. She wanted to yell at him and reprimand him for being such a trigger-happy asshole who practically came off like a carbon copy of Gaston. Couldn't they just calmly talk through things instead of threatening to terminate anything that moved in a way that didn't please them?

"Don't any of you move a fucking muscle." The cop drew closer to them, "You, the dyke. Don't try anything." He moved towards Ruby first, taking her wrists and handcuffing them behind her back before roughly shoving her down to her knees. "Stay there."

As the cop moved towards her, Belle tried again to reason with him even if she wanted nothing more than to lash out and take her mounting frustration out on him. "Please, just let us go. We didn't mean any harm."

Pain exploded by the side of Belle's face before she found herself on the floor, cheek throbbing. "What did I say about shutting up?"

Then Ruby took action, breaking the cuffs without blinking, shoving the cop away from Belle, picking her up and charging out through the now wider opening in the wall.

* * *

Seeing Belle hurt all over again had been the last straw. Ruby was scared and wanted to cooperate with the authorities and maybe lessen the trouble they were going to be drowning in. But the moment she saw the cop strike Belle down, that was it. Breaking the handcuffs had been easy. They were nothing like the cuffs designed to restrain a lycanthrope.

And from there, it was easy to pull the cop away and pick Belle up.

But now, they were running blindly through the fields and in the rain. The stupid glasses weren't helping. All they did was catch the rain and blur her vision. On top of that, it irritated her nose.

Belle seemed to notice Ruby's struggle and removed the glasses for her.

Though the rain still kept getting in her eyes, it was a huge improvement and Ruby had a better view of where she was going. Lightning and thunder made her heart skip beats, almost tempting her to just stop running and hide in the areas where there were tall plants and grass.

Until Belle pointed out a cluster of trees, "Maybe we could stop there?"

Ruby changed course and started making her way there, already starting to feel tired again. She was stronger and faster than this. She _knew_ she was, based on the tests they had run on her when she was at the facility. But she was probably still weak from the full moon. And hungry. And sleep hadn't exactly been restful.

By the time she reached the trees, Ruby was breathing heavily. Still, she put Belle down as gently as possible.

It didn't provide much cover from the wind, and droplets of rain still came through the leaves, but it was probably the best they could do. And maybe the rain would stop soon.

Ruby settled herself at the base of the tree and leaned her back against it. Belle joined in.

It still scared Ruby to have Belle so close by, and it was terrifying to know how close she'd come to having her arm broken or ripped off or torn into, just because Ruby had let herself get too relaxed, too careless, too caught up in her dreams and memories. It just wasn't safe.

But it felt soothing, too. The warmth of Belle's body, the light weight to her leaning against Ruby, the sound of her breathing in and out, the scent that was just _Belle_.

Everything about Belle was both frightening and soothing. It was a clashing, conflicted feeling that Ruby couldn't quite figure out. She wanted them to be close to each other and she wanted Belle's help with learning all the stupid simple things that Ruby could no longer do on her own. But she also wanted to be distanced from Belle because being with the subject was dangerous. Being anywhere near the subject always came with the risk of getting hurt.

And everything that had happened in the last few weeks had only led to hardship, pain, terror and trauma for Belle.

She was supposed to be a brilliant scientist, that's what Gold said, wasn't it? Belle had a lot of potential and the subject just kept ruining everything for her, distracting her and veering her off the course she was meant to go. Whatever career Belle could have had was probably destroyed thanks to the subject.

"What's on your mind?" Belle asked.

"You." The subject answered. "Me." She pulled off the hat and rubbed her head. "Gold."

"It's all going to be worth it." Belle clasped their hands, intertwining their fingers. "Just remember what I said. About how some day, you're going to come into your own and be Ruby's Ruby. We'll work our way towards that."

Too tired to argue, the subject just nodded. "Okay."

What did that mean, anyway?

She was still working on trying to call herself Ruby again. Trying to think of herself as Ruby and not as the subject. Trying to think of herself as human and not a monster. The whole concept of being _Ruby's_ Ruby was strange after spending so long as Gold's possession. If anything, it was almost comforting to think of herself as _Belle's_ Ruby. She was more than willing to protect Belle and do whatever she wanted to repay her for how she had been such a big part of liberating the subject.

She was more than willing to protect and serve the whole team that helped set her free of the facility.

Belle didn't seem to want that.

And it was such an alien thought.

The subject didn't know how to belong to herself. Ruby never really knew how to belong to herself either. Before the facility, she had always been her mother's daughter. Sometimes she was Peter's girlfriend or Dorothy's best friend. But she never really was… Ruby's Ruby.

What did that even mean?

Ruby doubted she was ready to figure out the answer to that, but she couldn't help wondering. She chewed on the thought and thought about if it might mean being able to drive and go anywhere she wanted, like what Belle said. Did it mean being able to get a job and provide for herself? Did it mean being able to sleep through the night without waking up digging her nails into Belle's arm? Did it mean being able to eat food without making a humiliating mess of herself? Did it mean being able to pay for that food on her own?

Thinking of all the things she was going to have to learn to do made Ruby anxious. She didn't know how she was going to accomplish any of that. There was so much she still needed to learn and she had no clue how she was going to start.

When the urge to dig her claws into her palms kicked in, Ruby remembered her hand was intertwined with Belle's.

Belle promised she would help Ruby.

She was going to help Ruby figure out how to stand on her own and be… Ruby's Ruby. And everything that entailed.

Something was off.

The feeling interrupted Ruby's train of thought as the rain started to die down and the sky started to lighten. She looked around, feeling like they weren't alone. It was almost like a figure kept hovering just at the edge of her vision.

"Ruby?" Belle must have fallen asleep while Ruby was deep in thought. There was a grogginess to Belle as she sat up and looked around. "What's up?"

"I'm glad you two are okay."

Ruby stiffened at the sound of Aurora's voice, somehow in their heads but still also outside of them. It was a bizarre feeling of hearing it in her head and hearing it with her ears. That was accompanied by the just as odd feeling of sensing Aurora more than seeing her.

"Aurora, you won't believe how glad I am to hear your voice again." Belle was awake now, leaning forward and speaking clearly. "We've had a rough night."

"Yeah, it feels like you did." Aurora's sympathy drifted over them as she sensed their tiredness. "Killian was able to get the Dunbroch parents and triplets settled into the hideout, but he still has to arrange to come and pick us up."

"That's the good news." Belle raised an eyebrow, "Why do I feel like there's a _but_."

There was a feeling of sheepishness and discomfort, almost accompanied by the image of Aurora wringing her hands and fidgeting with her hair. "We might have to make our way west to the next town. Emma enjoyed her alcohol a little too much last night and kind of drew attention to herself."

A hazy image of Emma at a bar with Neal and Regina passed through their minds, but it was too foggy to make out the details and Aurora didn't want to dwell on it too much. She instead had them picture Williamsport some distance away from here. "We might want to move farther away from this general area. There also may have been some reports about the two of you. Neal's been tampering with police scanners and databases so there's nothing really on record, but that doesn't change the fact that some people encountered some of us."

"How are we supposed to travel without a vehicle though?" Belle asked, pushing up her glasses so she could pinch the bridge of her nose. "I'm starting to really miss my car."

"We can't use the same truck from when we broke out of the facility." Aurora seemed to sense Belle's judgement on questionable driving skills, because there was almost a bitter taste to her messages after that. "There are pictures and reports of that truck from when we got away, which by the way I did manage to drive in order to get us safely away from Baelfire."

"Yes, you did." Belle bottled up her exasperation. "I appreciate that. I'm sorry."

Aurora seemed to huff before continuing. "If you still have money from what I gave you, maybe paying a cab extra would be an option? Or you could be charming and hitch a ride."

"We'll figure something out." Belle sounded doubtful. "So we'll meet at Williamsport?"

"Yeah." Aurora answered. "Tomorrow morning."

That meant another night with no clue where to stay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol fun fact Belle's concept of Ruby's Ruby was kind of taken from a drunk speech I gave my friend a few weeks ago. It was because she was having boy troubles after breaking up with a man who controlled her life for seven years. WHEW.
> 
> I'll see when I can update again but hopefully within a week again. I also want to get some other things done and get my life back in order lol. But yeah, I hope you're enjoying the ride so far. THE SAFEHOUSE IS JUST SO CLOSE TO THEIR FINGERTIPS NOW WE JUST HAVE TO HANG IN A LITTLE LONGER.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fack I'm sorry this chapter almost took a month to come out. I feel pretty bad about it after giving you guys almost a chapter a day just last April ;_; I had a pretty busy couple of weeks and my moods were kind of all over the place for a while as well. But I hope I'm back on track now. I'm really sorry, y'all.

When Aurora's presence faded away, Belle found herself feeling empty and heavy at the same time. The reality hit her that their journey wasn't over and there was still more struggle ahead. More stress and fear. More exhaustion if they still couldn't find a place to sleep. More hunger if they didn't find a place to eat soon. Their last meal was breakfast yesterday and now Belle was thirsty and hungry and tired.

Just really, really  _tired_.

Her head was in a heavy fog, her eyes were warm and watery. Every limb was stiff and sore, weighed down by yesterday's physical activity, tense from sleeping in uncomfortable positions. There was a scratchy dryness through her throat and a sharp pang of hunger to her stomach.

She had been hanging on, hoping it would all be over once morning came.

But it wasn't.

And Belle had to find it in herself to stand up and keep moving and take care of Ruby and figure out their next move. Going back to the area where the town was more populated was probably not going to be a good idea. Especially not after Aurora said they raised some suspicion after avoiding the cop.

Still, Belle felt like they were running out of options.

"Should we call Tiana?" Belle asked, knowing that she had wanted it to be a last resort. But after they spent the night trying to squat and then eventually just sleeping outdoors, Belle felt like now was as good a time as any to go for their last resort.

Ruby rubbed at her short hair. "Maybe…?"

"I'd rather not spend another night trying to avoid cops because we're caught squatting or trespassing." Belle admitted, "But I'd also rather not get Tiana into trouble."

"If…" Ruby licked her dry lips. "If they come…" Talking at length was still something she struggled with, but she was making progress and Belle was proud of her for that and knew better than to pressure or rush through the pauses in her words. "We… we protect… her."

Belle nodded. "Yeah. We will."

They reluctantly pulled themselves to their feet and started to walk. Belle wracked her brains to recall where they saw a gas station since that would probably have a payphone they could use to contact Tiana.

Things would have been a lot more convenient if Belle had her devices back, but that would have been too much of a hassle to arrange and too much of a danger to have. Just logging into her social media would probably alert authorities who were keeping an eye out for her doing exactly something like that. Just one post would lead them right towards their targets.

And again, Belle didn't even want to think about what being caught would result in.

If their failed first escape attempt led to misery and pain, what more if they got caught now?

A glance over at Ruby showed the color coming back to her skin and the life coming back to her eyes as she looked up at the sky while they walked. There were still bags under her eyes and a gauntness to her protruding cheekbones, but the her shoulders were lifted and her hands weren't clenching into themselves.

Ruby still had a long way to go, but Belle couldn't let anything revert the small progress they've made.

These were the thoughts that wandered through Belle's mind as they finally came to a gas station with a payphone. Belle fumbled with her pocket until she could pull out the crumpled up napkin with Tiana's number. The ink had blotched and faded, but with some effort, Belle was able to decipher the number and call it.

It rang.

And rang.

And rang.

Until dial tone switched to the busy tone.

This could be a sign that dragging Tiana into their mess was not an option they were supposed to go for. It was dangerous and risky and they should probably be dedicating more time into clearing out of the area in case the cop they ran into was still after them.

But Ruby was managing to forget about their rough night and instead admiring the sky again. The expanse of endless blue was very different from the harsh grays of her small prison of a room. The wonder with which she looked at her surroundings pulled at Belle's chest in ways that made her want to do everything she could to ensure that the poor girl could finally be happy and safe.

Sighing, Belle resolved to try again, putting in more of her change and dialing the number one more time. It rang a few more times and Belle had to resist the urge to hang up.

But Tiana  _did_  answer this time.

"Hello?" Her voice came into the other line, "Who's this?"

"Tiana," Belle hesitated at saying their names, knowing the newsflash about Baelfire had shown in the diner at least once. "It's us. The two girls from the diner yesterday."

"The tall thin one with the short hair?" Tiana asked, "And the shorter one who cut her hair in the bathroom?"

Of course the description for Belle was the  _shorter one._  She felt just a tad miffed about that, but knew better than to make a fuss. "Yeah, that's us."

"What's up?"

Fiddling with the telephone cord, Belle thought about how they were overstepping and wondered how to make it seem less like that. "Does your offer for a place to stay the night still stand? We're more than willing to compensate you and help out if ever."

Silence.

Belle's heart started to pick up its pace.

"Okay, but I want to talk about it first." When Tiana finally spoke, there was hesitance to her tone, "Meet me outside the diner after my shift ends around 3pm."

"We'll be there." Belle released the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding while waiting for Tiana's answer. "Thank you so much!"

"See you later then."

Still trying to remind herself how to breathe, Belle nodded even if she couldn't be seen. "See you."

When Tiana hung up, Ruby looked over with a grin like she'd used her abilities to hear the whole conversation. She didn't say anything, but did a little bounce.

"We'll be meeting her outside the diner this afternoon." Belle said, "Though I have a feeling you heard most of that."

Ruby nodded.

With the call out of the way, Belle was back to thinking about how knives were digging into the inside of her stomach and her heavy head felt on the verge of falling off of her shoulders. She needed food and better sleep soon.

They entered the small convenience store in the gas station to scrounge for something to eat.

* * *

Burning silver pressed against her skin and the collar heavily weighed her neck down. The cuffs on her wrists were burning weights keeping her hands from moving as freely as before. It was no more than usual, but this was her first time running on a treadmill with them.

Her bare feet slapping against the rubber belt were warming up her soles while sweat coated her face and dripped down her chin. It was like her lungs were working with acid instead of air as she struggled to push herself with each stride. Heat collected under her skin while her throat felt dry and rough with each heaving breath.

But no matter how hard she ran, they still didn't seem impressed.

It was only when she started to stumble and struggle to stay upright despite buckling knees and wobbly legs that they finally stopped the treadmill.

"204, you can rest for a bit and-"

The speaker shut off before Dr. Hopper could finish speaking, just as the door slid open for Dr. Gold to come through. Dark lines etched into his face showed his disappointment and frustration.

"You're not trying hard enough, dearie." Dr. Gold's voice was soft but tight and restrained. One hand was clenched while the other wrapped around his wrist, adding a look of squareness and stiffness to his small shoulders.

A part of her wanted to insist that she was trying her best, but instead she focused on catching her breath. There just wasn't enough air and she felt lightheaded as she bent over and hugged herself, leaning against the wall. As she ran her hands through her hair and wiped the sweat from her face, she remembered the scanners on her head and moved her hands away. Still, she couldn't help but feel aware of how greasy and sticky her hair was getting.

"Let's try something else." Dr. Gold moved towards her and started to undo the chains that kept her hooked to the treadmill.

Though there was some brief but stupid moment of relief at being unchained, she bottled up the feeling as she recalled how being unrestrained meant being a dangerous creature that might hurt people just like she hurt…

Images came to mind, of the smiling face of the boy with his arm around her shoulders and the cocky smirk of the girl prodding her ribs and teasing her about her height. Those images were overpowered by the blood on the floor, the guts on the walls, the shattered shelf.

"204." Dr. Gold's voice came from to the side. He was opening a door before he went through it. "Come here."

With legs still threatening to topple her over and lungs still working inadequately, she stumbled after Dr. Gold. It helped to cling to the wall for balance, but it still troubled her that she was unrestrained and her heart rate was still very high.

They had said that an elevated heart rate was often tied to the transformation, based on their research and study.

She didn't want to hurt Dr. Gold after he worked so hard to fix her.

"Perhaps speed and endurance is still too unstable for us to study." Dr. Gold gestured towards equipment that resembled those in a gym, though the weights looked far too heavy for the average person to lift or push. "Maybe we could study your strength for now instead."

The realization that she was going to have to lift the weights hit like a blow to the gut. Her stomach flipped before sinking down to her unsteady knees.

She swallowed with her dry throat and tried to protest, but felt at a loss for words. What right did she have to protest, anyway? She was under their care now and they were studying her and testing her so they could best figure out how to fix her. This was all for the best and this was all necessary.

In a scratchy voice she realized she barely used, she managed to say, "Okay."

Instead of starting small with a dumbbell, Dr. Gold led her to a large, dark block taller than herself and wider than if she spread her arms out. The sleek surface looked almost metallic.

"This is a heavy material we've developed specifically for those with unusual strength. We also sometimes have our more advanced psychics lift this telepathically." Dr. Gold explained, starting to move a safer distance away from her. "I want you to lift it, 204."

She looked the block up and down. It was bigger than she was and probably heavier than she was. Probably heavier even than whatever she weighed before she started living in this facility. How was she supposed to lift that?

"Go on." Dr. Gold's voice was low, more of a warning or an order than a suggestion.

Fidgeting with her hands, she approached the block and crouched down in front of it, noticing there were grooves along the edges where she could slip her fingers through.

Then she strained and press her shoulder against it.

Her muscles screamed and her shoulder bruised and her fingers burned, but the block didn't even move.

"You can do this, 204." Dr. Gold said, "Try harder."

She was trying her best, but it wasn't good enough. It was never good enough for anyone.

"We can't cure you if we can't get accurate observations on the parameters of your strength." Dr. Gold continued, "This is just a warm up, we have more advanced devices to measure your abilities with. This should be easy for you."

It wasn't easy.

Her whole body was trembling and burning and her clenched teeth were making her jaw stiff and her neck burned from the collar and her wrists burned from the cuffs and she couldn't do it.

"Try harder."

Frustration started to build up as she continued to try to at least push the block forward if she really couldn't lift it, but even that wasn't working out.

"Harder."

Her face was burning up and her eyes were burning up and her hands were burning up and she was frustrated with herself for not being able to do what Dr. Gold wanted.

"204, _LIFT IT._ "

Everything was burning up and her throat was rumbling in a way she couldn't understand and her eyes were warm and painful and her fingers felt strange and her jaw felt awkward in her mouth.

But most of all, she felt the burn and the anger and the frustration.

A growling sound filled the room and she just processed that the sound came from her as she lifted the block up a few inches, then over her shoulders, then despite her trembling legs, she stood up and lifted the block above her head.

For a wild moment, she wanted to throw it right at Dr. Gold.

But she pushed that horrible thought away immediately.

"Well done, 204." There was a smile on his face and she felt warm and proud of herself for pleasing him. Then as an afterthought, he added, "We'll run a few more tests then I'll arrange to have you scheduled for the shower rooms this week."

* * *

The memories kept coming back, battering at Ruby's skull and clawing at her heart. It was like having Merida's claws slicing through flesh, muscle and bone all over again. The piercing sound almost seemed to echo in her ears and brain again. Jolts of electricity were just about firing through her veins. Her wrists burned from the silver cuffs and her neck stiffened from the scorching collar.

Digging her claws into her palms helped force her mind back into her real body. It pushed away the Ruby that was still chained to the bed and locked in the small bright room.

Squinting, Ruby found herself flinching at the brightness of the sun. It was warm and yellow, unlike the cold white of the too-bright light of before.

But still, something about it bothered her. It clawed at her eyes and brought her back to her prison, brought her back to the long hours on the treadmill or the straining muscles that came with lifting heavy objects or pushing against pressure plates.

It brought her back to Dr. Gold's voice, soothing her and comforting her and making her feel like she could trust him.

Blood was coating her palms and slithering down her arms as she pressed her knuckles against her forehead and curled into herself.

"Ruby?"

Belle's voice cut through the fog, accompanied by hands coaxing hers back into open palms. "Ruby, were you dreaming again?"

Looking away from Belle and the blood, Ruby nodded.

"That's normal." The reassuring tone didn't quite reassure Ruby. Even as Belle wiped away the blood with a handkerchief. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Ruby shook her head.

Finishing up with cleaning Ruby's hands as best she could, Belle then scanned their surroundings. Which was another field with overgrown foliage tall enough to hide them as they caught up on some much needed sleep. They were lucky this time to have avoided getting caught. For now anyway.

"I guess it's noon-ish now." Belle said. "Would you maybe like to start heading back to the main town? Towards the diner?"

A shrug was the only answer that Ruby could give.

The grass was fading in and out, and she sometimes felt like she was still sitting on the metallic floor that cooled her skin and stiffened her joints.

"I'm more than willing to listen, if you want to talk." Belle squeezed Ruby's hands. "But I also understand if you don't want to right now. I won't rush you or pressure you."

Ruby nodded and tried to verbalize her thanks, but it caught in her throat like a lump catching at the collar she no longer wore.

"We'll be safe soon." Belle spoke again, "We just have to hang on for a little longer. I trust Killian to have found a place for us to stay. We'll be there soon enough and enjoying a nice warm breakfast."

That sounded nice, but still very alien to Ruby. She tried to imagine the cabin she'd heard them mention, but all she could picture was a bigger version of her cell at Baelfire. Maybe with a carpet or something. If she tried hard enough, she could vaguely picture her old room, with her dark bed sheets and red curtains and her Twilight comforter.

If she tried too hard, she brought herself back to the basement.

"Let's go?" Belle stood up and offered her hand to Ruby.

Shaking her head to clear it still kept stray thoughts wandering just behind her eyes, but Ruby did what she could to ignore them and take Belle's hand, pulling herself to her feet and following her as they made their way back to the path, then down the road and back towards the busier part of town.

It took a few wrong turns and awkwardly asking for directions until they got to a more familiar road that eventually led them to the diner. Once they came close to entering, Tiana came out and ushered them to an alley by the side of the building, next to a dumpster that made Ruby's nose burn.

"I saw you before you went and did your little hat and glasses and haircut thing." Tiana's shoulders were stiff as she folded her arms across her chest. "I know you're hiding from something, and I know you look a lot like two of the girls on those wanted posters from the facility in Maine."

As Tiana continued to talk, Ruby's heart started to pound against her chest while her stomach clenched. Did this mean she was going to give them up? Had she already called the authorities? Was this a trap?

Ruby looked around for guards or police hiding in the shadows and waiting for the right moment to bring out prods and guns. It was impossible to smell anything beyond the dumpster and Ruby feared it had been an intentional trick to mask the scents of people getting ready to catch them.

"I don't want any lies." Tiana continued. "Just tell me the truth. Who are you and why are you hiding?" She gestured vaguely, "Or running away, or whatever."

"I…" Belle was fidgeting with her jacket zipper, "Yes. I'm Belle French and this is Ruby Lucas."

A gasp whooshed out of Tiana and her crossed arms then fell to her sides. "Whew. Okay. The reports call her Subject 204."

It was still too hard to scent for a trap and Ruby was starting to feel her eyes warming up. She clenched her jaw and adjusted the glasses annoying her nose. Belle's hand reached for Ruby's. Taking deep breaths and focusing on the feel of their touching palms and fingers, she tried to keep back the wolf that was on the verge of panicking and coming out.

"Yes." Belle said. "It's a long story," There was a hitch to her voice as she spoke, seeming to recall that long story of pain and fear.

Tiana raised her eyebrow. "Yeah, I can imagine. But I'm putting my career, probably my freedom on the line here. My  _life_ , even." A shudder passed through Ruby as she thought of what Gold or the guards might do to Tiana if she was found to be helping them. Thoughts of how Mulan had been tortured came to mind. "Why shouldn't I just call the cops right now?"

"Because I think you understand that we got to escape a world of abuse," Belle was squeezing Ruby's hand while the other still fidgeted with the jacket zipper. "And I think a part of you probably wouldn't want to be a reason we end up in that world again."

There was no immediate answer from Tiana. Her furrowed brow was weighed down by her struggle with the gravity of the decision she was going to have to make.

"Please," Belle said, "You might have seen some of the videos our friend Neal put up, of how they…" Another hitch to Belle's voice accompanied her glancing at Ruby, then back at Tiana. "…how they treated her."

Tiana's eyes were on the ground and her voice was soft. "A few of them are viral, yeah."

"That's what's waiting for her," Belle pulled off her glasses and hung them over her jacket so she could wipe at her eyes. "Please, Tiana, I can't…" Her voice faltered and she ran a hand through her hair and looked away for a moment, regaining her composure, then looking back at Tiana and continuing, "I can't let them do that to her again."

Rubbing her palms against each other, Tiana took a step back and pressed them against her mouth and let out a long sigh.

Ruby could feel her hand being squeezed by Belle, and as she leaned in, the tremors going through her small frame could be felt against Ruby's arm. The words to comfort Belle and try to talk to Tiana kept running away, dangling out of reach and Ruby just had no idea how she was supposed to express herself.

Talking might just make the situation worse. Ruby wasn't good at talking anymore, if she ever had been.

"Okay." Tiana gestured towards them once she was ready to speak again. "What they're saying on the news clashes really badly with what they say and show in the videos. And…" Clenching her hands into fists, Tiana lowered her voice and looked away from them. "I know how news and reports can really twist the truth."

Belle nodded.

Sighing again, Tiana rubbed at her forehead. "Okay. She looked at them. "Okay. One night."

Had they just heard that correctly? Ruby looked from Belle to Tiana and back, still not quite believing this was the answer. Weren't there police just hiding behind the corner? Was this the moment when they would be beaten into submission and dragged back to Gold's chains?

"T-thank you!" Belle stammered over her response before taking a breath to compose herself and talk more steadily. "Yes, one night is all we need. After that, we're meeting the rest of the team at Williamsport."

"I'll drive you there." Tiana said, surprising them all, even seeming to surprise herself. "I have an afternoon shift tomorrow, so I can drop you off in the morning."

They were too stunned to respond right away.

Until Belle was able to get herself to say, "Thank you! Thank you so much, Tiana. We'll help out as much as we can with dishes and we'll be clean and we won't make a mess. And we'll compensate you, I still have a bit of leftover money and-"

"Wait, wait." Tiana held up her hand. "First, my place is really small, I hope that's okay. Second, I would rather you didn't use up what's left of your money. Just…" She shrugged, "Just give me more of an explanation of the situation once we're at my place."

Belle hesitated, "I'd still like to pay you back in the future. But yes, we'll explain everything."

This was surreal. Ruby still couldn't help but look around for Gaston hiding in the shadows with his prod or Dr. Gold just waiting for the right moment to press the button that would trigger the painful sound that sent needles into her ears and brain.

But none of that happened. Instead, they actually went to Tiana's apartment.

* * *

Tiana lived in a little studio apartment with the bare necessities for furniture and minimal clutter that gave Belle the idea that maybe she wasn't home that often. Although if Tiana did anything when she was home, Belle could guess that would be cooking.

There was a small shelf full of cook books close to a kitchen that was probably the most populated part of the space, full of pots and pans hanging from hooks above a well-stocked spice rack. Meanwhile, the bed across the kitchen didn't even look like it had been slept in. Although Tiana might also just be very neat and made her bed regularly.

"It's not much." Tiana went straight to her cabinet, "I've been mostly saving whatever I earn so I can start my own business someday."

"A restaurant?" Belle asked, eyeing the books.

Tiana rifled through her cabinet and pulled out an oversized shirt with an illustration of a crocodile dancing with a frog.. "Yeah. Been studying up on business stuff as well but it's a lot to take in." She held the shirt in front of Ruby. "I think this is all I've got that'll fit you most comfortably."

Ruby accepted the shirt and opened her mouth to manage a croaky, "Thank you." After being given shorts as well, she went to the bathroom to change into them.

"You really don't mind sharing your clothes?" Belle asked, "I mean, we managed to sleep in these last night… It's no trouble."

Tiana raised an eyebrow before passing a shirt with a teacup printed on the upper left. "What kind of host would I be if I didn't do everything to make sure you two are comfortable?"

"You could very well be charged for being accessory to our crimes or housing fugitives or whatever else they can come up with." Belle took the clothes and moved to wait outside the bathroom, "We should be the ones making it up to you and making you comfortable."

Moving back to the main living area, Tiana laid out blankets and sheets on the couch and floor. "You can make it up to me by telling me the full story, and I can update you on what the news has been saying."

"Fair enough," Belle finished up changing and freshening up after Ruby was done. It was tempting to just drench herself in the shower and stand under the spray for several eternities, but she knew better than to give Tiana problems with the water bill. Keeping it quick was the polite thing to do and Belle made sure to pick her hair out of the drain and dry herself off properly to avoid wetting the floor.

Once they were all done, they settled into their spots, Belle and Ruby on the sofa, Tiana on her bed next to it. An assortment of chips were laid out on the table and after looking at them several times for permission, Ruby was the first to dig in.

"So," Tiana leaned forward from her spot sitting on the bed. "There's a lot of news going on about the breakout and the viral videos of the experiments has set off this major debate." She waved her hands as and looked upwards as she enumerated some of the things sparked by the incident. "Debate about the rights of the subjects, the ethics of the scientists…"

With a glance at Ruby that was hard to read, Tiana added, "…and the dangers of psychics and cryptids and shapeshifters and all that."

Belle nodded, "It's a touchy subject, yes." She cringed as she recalled how clinically she used to view Emma and Regina. Now, she couldn't quite relax wondering if they were alright. "But at the end of the day, they're living beings who deserve to be treated with respect and humanity."

She couldn't help but notice that while Tiana nodded, Ruby shrugged.

Tempting as it was question how Ruby could still think about herself as less than human when she had gone so far as to call Gold a monster during their escape, Belle knew that it would take a lot longer to move out of the toxic mindset the facility had seven years to build.

And, if Ruby's mother had anything to do with abandoning Ruby in the facility, she may very well have contributed to that crippling lack of self-worth

"Interestingly enough," Tiana reached over to take a handful of chips. "There's been a lot being said about the team that stole the subjects. Specially Li and Cassidy. But you though, Belle, it's a mix of reports. Some are saying you were coerced, some are saying you were kidnapped as well."

Rubbing her palms together to keep herself from clenching them into fists, Belle brought her shoulders up before exhaling and letting them drop. "I think he still hopes he can get me to work for him again."

"Tell me about that." Tiana glanced from Ruby to Belle and back, "Working there, living there, who else was in there, anything."

It seemed like a lifetime ago that she was this bright-eyed little intern barely able to keep herself from bouncing in her seat as her idol first strolled into that lecture room to brief them about the subjects they would be studying. She could still remember how she leaned forward and clung to his every word with eager eyes and unconstrained excitement. Every time he praised her for her contributions, her stomach flipped and her head felt like it was floating away.

"I was a big fan of Gold before I started working there. He invited me and Aurora and two others to an internship program." The words tasted foul in Belle's mouth. "I looked up to him and his work and I wanted to be the one to earn the permanent position. I wanted to study the psychics and discover new aspects to their abilities, fresh correlations between different parts of the subjects."

"You thought you were doing something good?" Tiana prompted.

"I thought I was doing great things and learning under a great man." A shudder passed through Belle and she found herself leaning into Ruby. "I mean there were moments when I thought something might have been off, like how he spoke to Emma and Regina or how miserable and scared they both were." Belle bit her lip and shook her head, "But I was too caught up in the science of it, I didn't stop to think of the ethics of it, I guess."

Nodding, Tiana then looked over at Ruby, "Do you want to talk about what it was like? Living there?" Her voice was noticeably softer, gentler and there was more warmth to her eyes. She probably understood that Ruby's side would be a lot harder to tell.

Upon noticing Ruby starting to fidget with her hands, Belle took the nearest one and clasped it, intertwining their fingers. "Only if you want to, Ruby."

"I…" Ruby opened and closed her mouth and tightened her grip on Belle's hand. "I…"

Scrunching her eyes shut, Ruby grit her teeth and grabbed Belle's other hand, "Silver… burning silver." Tremors were starting to go through Ruby and Belle wrapped arms around her, "Bright room. Always bright."

"Sshh, Ruby," Belle held Ruby close and maintained hold of her hands as she started to curl up into a fetal position, "It's okay, you're safe here."

"Electric prods. Hurt." She was trembling more visibly now, and she wrenched her hands out of Belle's before curling them into fists and pressing them against her forehead while her shoulders tensed up, almost touching her ears. "Silver knife. Electric prods. Evil noise hurting ears, hurting eyes, hurting brain. Electric prods."

Each breath was coming in and out in ragged gasps as Ruby rocked back and forth and struggled for air.

"Prods. Prods. Prods." Blood was slithering down from her palms as she dug her claws in deep. "Pain. Pain.  _Pain_."

A memory came through Belle's mind of Mulan once talking about Ruby being prone to panic attacks and breathing with her tended to help her through it. So Belle moved to face Ruby, and spoke to her in as calm and even a voice as possible despite Belle's own mounting distress.

"Ruby, it's okay. You're safe. We just need to breathe through this." Belle said, "Can I hold your hands?"

"Pain." Ruby gasped, but managed to open her hands and give them to Belle. "Scared. Dying. Shifting. Wolf. Death." When she looked up, her eyes were glowing amber and her jaw was clenched tight over sharpening teeth. She was breathing in and out, the sound hoarse and wheezy.

"Just breathe, okay?" Belle squeezed Ruby's hands, ignoring the sticky wetness of the blood. "Breathe with me, let's breathe in." She sucked in a breath while Ruby gasped but let it out immediately.

"And out." Exhaling, Belle tried again, "In…" Another attempt just had Ruby gasping it out again. She was wheezing and her amber eyes darted around the room before she scrunched them shut. Her shoulders were still pressed up against the sides of her head while her chin tucked against her chest. Breathing still came out fast and hard, but Belle persisted and stayed patient.

"In..."

Air sucked into Ruby's lungs, only to rush out again then in again.

"Out..." Belle maintained her patience. "Let's try again, in..." She breathed in, and Ruby managed to join her and this time was able to hold it in a few seconds before letting it rush out.

Belle's thumb rubbed circles into the backs of Ruby's palms. "Okay, we're doing good, let's try again. In…"

Ruby's shoulders started to lower and she lifted her head to inhale.

"…And out."

The breath rushed out as more of a gasp, but it was becoming easier and the tension in Ruby's shoulders and face was starting to ease, but she kept her eyes closed.

"In…"

"…And out."

Tiana came over with a washcloth and moved it towards Ruby, "I'll just dab this on your face to help you cool it down, is that okay?" That was when Belle noticed how sweat was collecting along Ruby's forehead and slithering down to drip from her chin.

Opening her eyes showed they were starting to fade back into green, but they were still more lime than teal. She managed to nod to Tiana.

"In…"

They continued to breathe while Tiana dabbed at Ruby's face with the washcloth.

"…out."

It took a good while, enough for Belle's hands to feel numb and for the blood between them to begin drying and darkening. But they were able to calm Ruby back to quiet, even breathing. She let go of Belle's hands and slid from the couch, down to the sheets and blankets on the floor. They cleaned her hands as she started to drift into sleep.

Once Ruby had stilled, Belle helped clean the flecks of blood that had gotten on the couch and the floor. They walked to the kitchen area to wash the cloth and rags.

"I'm sorry," Tiana whispered, brow furrowed, lips tight.

Belle shook her head. "It's okay. A lot of wounds are still really fresh. We did just get out…" For a moment Belle questioned her sense of time, before continuing and hoping she was counting right. "…the other day."

"She's a werewolf, right?" Tiana asked, squeezing water out of the rag. "Or what do you call her?"

"Lycanthrope was the term we used." Belle started to put away the wrappers of the chips, throwing the empty ones and taping closed the ones that still had contents. "And they treated her horribly. Shaved her head, kept her in a collar and cuffs, chained her to her bed, electrocuted her when she was out of line. That's when they weren't deafening her with a soundwave only she and a few other subjects could hear."

Realizing her hands were trembling, Belle placed them on the counter and breathed slowly to calm herself down. "You can see the scars on her limbs and face. That's all on them. The really deep single line from her forehead to her jaw is from a silver knife Gold used because the wolf wasn't cooperating the way he'd like."

The memory still came back clear and crisp, of the way Gold brandished the blade and raked it across Ruby's face. The same one that mangled Mulan's hand.

Shaking her head, Belle tried not to recall the blood and bone, the torn muscle and open skin.

"I'm sorry I asked." Tiana said, "If there's anything more I can do, just call me again, okay?"

"You've done more than enough," Belle put a hand over Tiana's. "We'll find a way to repay you some day."

* * *

Though it was a dark, dreamless sleep, Ruby still awoke feeling the weight of exhaustion in the bags under her eyes and the heaviness to her shoulders. On top of that, her heart still skipped beats at every sound and every scent. Gold, Gaston and the prods were behind every corner and in every shadow. Every flicker of light was a prod waiting to shock her. Every unrecognizable scent was some chemical to be injected into her. Every roar of car engines or fall of footsteps could only mean the guards were pulling up outside the building and making their way in.

It took a great deal of effort to concentrate on her breathing, forcing it to come in and out slowly as she went through the motions of following Belle around.

Everything else felt distant, almost like she was just pressing herself against a glass wall and watching the scientists go about their work.

Tiana was saying something, but her voice was a fog through Ruby's cotton-filled ears. She felt awkward as she looked and nodded and tried to smile, but the movement felt mechanical on her face.

The breakfast of cereal should have been good- a feast to her tongue with the mix of milk and flavored crisps, but Ruby felt so detached from herself that she might as well have been eating the wooden table or the cardboard box. She was sloppy about it too, hands too shaky for the spoon that she ended up slurping most of it down.

Then as they changed back into the clothes from Aurora, Ruby fumbled again with dressing herself, all the more with how much her fingers felt like jelly in her hands. Belle came in to assist, saying words that vaguely sounded like reassurance.

As they got into the car for the drive to the next town down the road, Ruby looked out the window, to make sure the guards weren't just waiting to come after them. Tiana said something about needing to sell the car but feeling too attached to it since it was from her father. Belle expressed missing her own car, also from her father.

They continued to talk and Ruby couldn't get herself to join in. It felt so… away from her.

She couldn't eat properly, she couldn't dress properly, she couldn't even have a late night conversation properly. All she was good at was panicking over everything.

It almost felt like being a subject at the facility was easier. Decisions were made for her and she just did what she was told and things just happened to her.

Now, things were still happening to her, but they were so beyond what she was used to, requiring skills and thinking she didn't have. Sometimes it didn't feel real. Sometimes she wondered if she was still just going to wake up back in her room with the bright lights and the heavy chains.

Looking down at her wrists, she saw that the scars were still there, marks left by the cuffs. Adjusting her scarf, she knew there were scars around her throat, too. And her face was alien. When she saw it in Tiana's mirror, she couldn't believe it was her own. It was pale, with sunken eyes and hollow cheeks. Lines and marks riddled her skin, from the silver knife and Merida's claws. The stupid glasses barely did anything to hide them.

Ruby fidgeted with them and pushed them further up the bridge of her nose.

They got to the next town without a problem, Tiana dropping them off and wishing them luck. Ruby managed a smile and a wave. Belle entered the nearest coffee shop where they could sit and wait after she bought some tea.

"Ruby?" Belle's voice sounded so far away.

Furrowing her brow, Ruby tilted her head and focused on Belle's face.

"Do you want to… talk?" Belle adjusted the zipper of her jacket then ran a hand through her hair. It only reminded Ruby of the sacrifices and changes Belle was going through just to keep some broken creature safe from the scientists and guards. "You've been… You seem…"

With a shake of her head, Belle backtracked. "I'm just here, ready to listen. If you want to talk."

Ruby just shrugged.

Then they sat quietly, Ruby slouching into her chair, Belle sipping at her tea.

The silence was broken by a shift in the air that made Ruby stiffen. She gripped the table and looked around but didn't see anything out of the ordinary. Just people having their coffee and pastries. Nobody panicking or getting agitated.

 _It's me._  Aurora's voice came into their heads.  _Just wait there, we'll catch up soon_.

An image came through their minds of Neal, Regina and Emma crouching in a parking lot.  _Neal may or may not be trying to steal a car. I've tried to talk him out of it but they're out of cash after they spent a lot on booze the other night._  There was a hint of annoyance to Aurora's energy that rippled through them before she showed them images of a truck and a scruffy man with wide shoulders and big hands.

 _We had to sweet talk some sketchy guy but it all worked out. Mulan, Merida and I are on our way._  They got the sense of sitting on the passenger seat of the truck while Merida and Mulan sat at the back. Even they could feel Mulan's tense, heated energy.

 _I'm pretending to be asleep at the moment, and it's kind of creepy but that was the deal_. Aurora squirmed and they all felt her discomfort.  _But I think Mulan would probably punch or throttle him if he tries anything. So we'll be okay._

Once we're complete, Killian will meet us and fetch us so we can finally get to the hideout. He says he's ready with the right vehicle and the place is secure.

Belle responded to Aurora's update, saying something about her excitement at seeing them soon and worry about Neal, Emma and Regina.

Ruby found herself starting to tune out again, propping an elbow up on the table and leaning her cheek into her palm. Every customer in the café managed to remind her of a guard or a scientist and she hated how it made her chest tight and her throat dry.

* * *

Her hands trembled as she wrapped her arms around herself over her fresh gown. Water still coated her skin and seeped into the gown while her hair was plastered against her cheeks and back.

The last hour or so ran through her mind but she wasn't sure if she was processing it properly. They felt like both her memory and a scene she was watching of someone else.

She could see herself being stripped and hosed down by the guards, saw herself wearing nothing but the collar and the cuffs, chained to hooks driven into the floor. She saw her own hands trembling as she dug her nails into her palms to try to cope with the sick swirls of her stomach, saw the chains, saw the guard's cold eyes viewing her as an animal.

 _Violated_. Sick and violated. Those were the feelings that came to mind as she thought about what happened in the shower room.

And the tightness in her throat and the warmth to her eyes were hard to keep back. She moved her hands away from her body and to her face, pressing her palms against her eyes.

She wanted to go home. To go back to the way things were. She missed Peter and his hair and his jokes. She missed Dorothy and her teasing and her sarcasm and snark. She missed Granny. Granny always knew what to say to make things feel better, even if she got short-tempered sometimes.

Granny always had cookies saved for rainy days.

"Now, now, dearie." Dr. Gold's voice came from in front of her. "What's all this?"

Recoiling, she realized that he'd come into her room, probably to check on her, maybe to bring her out for more tests.

She wanted to ask him, beg him not to test her today, she just wanted to be alone and hide. She wanted to speak, but the words caught in her throat and sobs came out instead. They wracked her body as she curled up and faced away from him.

"You understand the precautions we want to take, don't you?" Dr. Gold put a hand on her shoulder and she resisted the urge to flinch away. "We would rather be safe than sorry. The chains are a necessity."

A nod was the only way she could communicate that she knew they were a necessity.

She just wished she could just take it without making such a fuss. Wished she could just deal with it and take it and be quiet and stop crying like some stupid loser. Mother hated crying and kept brushing it off or scolding it away. Maybe that's what she needed from Dr. Gold. A scolding instead of this fussing over her.

"You'll get used to it, dearie." Dr. Gold said, "Just give it some time. And maybe a bit of a push."

She nodded again.

"You're a strong creature, 204." Dr. Gold squeezed her shoulder then let go. "It's very easy for you to kill and injure. Think about how you lifted that block the other day, just like that. It was a good four times your weight."

How could she forget? It had been a moment that scared her, with how much her face burned and how her skin tingled with how close she was to shifting. There had been that horrible urge to harm and destroy Dr. Gold. It was a thought that made her sick to her stomach and she hoped she never had a thought like that again.

"We just want to make sure everyone is safe, you understand?" Dr. Gold said, "They're just precautions."

She nodded and wiped at her eyes. They were right. The precautions were necessary and she just had to get used to being more in control of herself.

And she had to remember that the facility knew better. That Dr. Gold knew better. Everything he did, he did to make sure she was under control and closer to a cure.

"Just trust in us, 204. Trust in what we do, because we're doing everything we can to cure you."

She nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should anyone else get makeovers too? Or should Ruby and Belle be the only nerds who got disguises?


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was brought to you by Leticia because I just feel like giving her a shout out. 
> 
>  
> 
> [Also I got a tattoo last week so now I feel like a badass.](http://wolfdogonthemoon.tumblr.com/post/163027844074/so-i-got-inked-today-and-it-hurt-like-hell-but-it)
> 
>  
> 
>   
> Pic is a week old because the tatt right now is in that nasty peeling phase where it itches but SOON IT WILL BE IN ITS FINAL CRISP FORM AND I'LL BE AWESOME.
> 
> Okay thanks for looking at my face, let's carry on.

The way Ruby kept shifting in her seat and looking around just broke Belle's heart. Gone was the eager, curious girl sniffing around and smiling at the sky. All that could be seen now was this frightened soul flinching every time someone passed by, every time the coffee machines hissed, cash registers beeped, baristas called names.

She was trying not to dig her palms into her hands, that much was clear in the way she fidgeted with her fingers and rapped her nails on the table. Sometimes she would rub her thumbs against her fingertips in little circles.

When she wasn't fidgeting, she was looking downwards and distantly, with heavy lids, a clenched jaw and a furrowed brow.

Belle had to remind herself that the excitable person enamored by the sky was still in there somewhere, just overpowered by the trauma kicked up by last night's incident.

And it had been stupid to let Tiana push and ask questions about the facility. Belle should have said something stronger than the useless default crap she spouted out about how Ruby didn't have to if she didn't want to. It should have been a question Ruby was warned about or kept away from altogether. She shouldn't have been exposed to those memories and Belle was responsible for that.

Belle was responsible for Ruby.

And the weight of it had been more concrete than ever last night.

The responsibility meant more than helping her eat or buckle her bras and button her shirts. More even than calming her through nightmares and talking her out of her self-destructive trains of thought.

It meant cleaning blood from her hands when she couldn't stop herself from self-harming. It meant facing the reality that she was a person who had some very severe traumas and those traumas came with a series of triggers that could lead to not just the panic attacks but the loss of spirit and spark that Ruby was exhibiting now.

It meant dealing with not just the highs of panic attacks and nightmares but the lows of depression and desolation. It meant finding the right balance between pushing her to face something or leaving her enough room to sufficiently recover from something.

And right now it seemed like she needed space.

Ruby was broken and it was all because Belle hadn't done a better job of taking care of her.

"I'm sorry," Belle felt the guilt catch in her throat and she tried to quiet herself but the words tumbled out. "I shouldn't have let Tiana ask you those questions."

Ruby looked up at Belle. "Why…" The voice that came out was gravelly and it took a few attempts of clearing her throat to continue with words that still sounded rough and scratchy. "Why… am I…"

A vague circular gesture followed before Ruby rubbed at her cheek, eventually just leaning against her palm, "…like... this?"

"You've been through a lot, Ruby." Belle tried to choose her words carefully and avoid setting off another attack. "And it'll take time to bounce back from that."

It was like tipping her toes through a minefield. For a moment, she wondered if this was really the way to go about it. Didn't she want to help Ruby learn to stand on her own? Not learn to avoid things that were frightening or difficult?

It was tough… the line between the two was hazy, with a lot of overlap and Belle was going to have to go by feel with what were moments that needed a push, a pull or clasped hands.

There was no response from Ruby as she slouched back against her chair.

"Do you want me to get you something?" Belle asked, pointing towards the counter, "A cake or a pastry maybe?"

Ruby just shook her head.

In the quiet that hung heavy between them, Belle overheard a group across them. They were talking about Baelfire and the subjects.

"Dude, the way they were treating the subjects there is fucked up." One of the boys said, "I think it's a good thing they got busted out of that shithole."

"Seriously?" Another guy said, "They're monsters in there. Shapeshifters and freaks with some dangerous as hell powers. They could make our heads explode just by looking at us! I'd feel a lot safer with them locked up."

It took all of Belle's willpower to keep herself from stomping over to them and telling the asshole how ignorant he was being and telling him of the horrors of Baelfire and how the real danger was the man in the lab coat.

* * *

Guards were stationed outside of her room, she could tell just by scent that there were two of them. They were ready to take action if she did anything she wasn't supposed to.

Not that she wanted to.

All she wanted was to be alone. She was a monster, after all she'd done to the students, to Mr. Spencer, to Dorothy and Peter. There were days she would for a second, forget that she was a monster and that she would wish to be out of this place, away from the pain, fear and degradation.

Until she reminded herself that she was a monster. This was what she deserved.

And as the scientist with glasses and a big forehead spoke to her in a soft, apologetic tone, she knew it wasn't treatment that she deserved. He shouldn't be so nice to her. "This will hurt for just a second," He said, putting the needle into the crook of her elbow. "We just need to take a blood test."

The subject just nodded, looking away from the blood as it started to fill the syringe.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked.

With how bright the lights were, it was difficult to sleep and she'd taken to hiding under the bed. It left her with stiff joints and sore muscles, worsened by the preceding strength and endurance tests. On top of that, her dreams tended to be full of Peter and Dorothy.

Thinking about them made her chest ache.

The scientist hadn't gotten his answer yet.

She looked at him and shrugged.

Then he surprised her by putting something in her hand. "Here, have a little token for your cooperation."

It was a strawberry lollipop.

This wasn't some kind of test, was it? Was she really supposed to accept something like this? It felt like it was against some protocol, but the scent of it reminded her of buying candy and splitting the haul with Dorothy. Memories of befriending the awkward girl who just moved in came flooding through her.

She tried to hand it back to the scientist, but he shook his head. "No, it's for you. No strings attached."

Still confused and in awe, she unwrapped the lollipop with shaky hands and jelly fingers, fumbling with it and almost dropping it before she finally managed to pop the thing into her mouth.

And it tasted like happiness and running and playing and laughing.

This was her first taste of something other than ground meat for the past… How long had she been here? It was impossible to count the days when they always kept her room lights on and her meals didn't always feel consistent. Sometimes they felt like they arrived at smaller intervals, sometimes there were long intervals that kept her hungry for…  _a while_.

"How…" Her voice rumbled and she had to clear her throat. "How long have I been here?"

The scientist -she looked at the name on his lab coat and saw that it read  _Dr. Hopper_ \- avoided eye contact then. "Not long."

Packing up his things with an urgency that wasn't there before, Dr. Hopper kept his back to her. "I have to get going. I'll see you again for more tests next time. Goodbye." The words tumbled out of him in a rush as he hurried towards the door, leaving her alone once more.

* * *

No matter how much water she drank, her throat just continued to feel dry and rough while the tightness in her chest never eased. One of the baristas at the counter almost looked like one of the assistants who used to be afraid of her and avoided coming near unless specifically instructed by Dr. Gold. The man sitting close to the door -wearing a suit and sipping his coffee while looking at his phone- his receding hairline of thin blond strands were a lot of like Dr. Whale's. The other man sitting close to the bathroom, he was curled into himself and had glasses and a rounded jaw a lot like Dr. Hopper's.

And there was the security guard outside whose shoulders were almost as wide as Gaston's. The sight of the baton at his hip reminded her too much of the prods. Her skin tingled at the memory of how the electricity fired through her body and made her spasm and writhe.

Was it always going to be like this?

She wished she could look around again and be in awe of the space and the color and the scents but instead she just felt fear and this weird sense of sorrow she couldn't quite understand.

The door swung open, bringing with it some familiar scents.

Ruby stood up and turned to see Aurora, Mulan and Merida approaching them. They looked tired and still wore the same clothes from the last time the group was together. What was different though was that Mulan's hair, already short before when it ended just about along her jaw, now it was cut a lot closer to her head with bangs that didn't go further than the middle of her forehead and strands that barely covered the sides and back of her head. Aurora too had cut her hair and it now ended just above her shoulders. Merida wore a baseball cap.

There was just enough time to take in each other's attempts at makeovers and disguises before Aurora threw herself upon Belle and hugged her tight, nearly lifting her off her feet.

"God, I'm so glad you two are okay." Aurora continued to squeeze the life out of Belle. "I missed you and I was so damn worried! I wanted to visit you more often but I had to conserve energy to be able to keep in touch with Killian."

"We missed you too." Belle was burying her head into Aurora's shoulder and seemed to be leaning into the embrace. "I almost missed your driving."

" _Almost_?"

"Almost."

While Aurora and Belle bantered and hugged, Ruby looked over at Mulan and Merida. Mulan still cradled her damaged hand close to her stomach. There were heavy bags under her eyes and a stiff set to her jaw. She tried to smile but only managed to straighten up and square her shoulders before extending her other hand.

It took a moment for Ruby to remember how to shake hands with people. She took Mulan's and they awkwardly went through the motion of it before reclaiming their hands and looking around the café.

But looking around only reminded Ruby more and more of people who looked like staff from the facility, so she returned her attention to Mulan and pointed at her damaged hand. "Still... hurts?"

Mulan nodded, breathing out and adjusting her hand. "I'll live."

Shifting her weight from one foot to the other, Ruby fidgeted with the cuffs of her sleeves and wondered what to say next. She looked at Merida and saw that though she still looked gaunt and pale, just like Ruby, there was color to her cheeks that wasn't there before.

Still, they didn't exchange words and Merida avoided eye contact, choosing instead to just take her seat at the booth. Mulan did the same, moving in to sit next to her.

Ruby was about to move back into the booth to sit down as well when hands grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her back. The instinct to lash out and growl had to be wrestled down- a skill she had honed from all the rough treatment at the facility.

As she realized it was just Aurora pulling her in for an embrace, Ruby still felt tense while her heart struggled to escape the confines of her chest. She felt trapped and constricted, like chains were holding her down again and scientists were looking down at her again and needles and knives were digging into her skin.

Then the warmth of Aurora's body set in, pulling Ruby back into the present of arms around her waist and a head leaning against her shoulder. Aurora was just a little taller than Belle, and a tad leaner. It took some adjustment to feel comfortable enough with the slight changes.

But Ruby didn't want to get comfortable. Allowing herself to get comfortable meant putting Aurora and everyone else in the vicinity in the grave danger that could only come from exposure to a monster.

It was tempting to push Aurora away and flee, but the fear of hurting her won out. Ruby knew she was too strong to be interacting with humans like this and being this close to them, but she also knew that treating them forcefully was dangerous and would do more harm than good.

"Ruby," Aurora whispered into her shoulder. "I'm so glad you're safe and out of that place now."

There was nothing but genuine concern and relief coming from Aurora, from the softness of her words to the warmth of her embrace to the lean of her head against Ruby's shoulder.

She… cared.

They went through all this hardship to free her and they were glad to see her free and they only wanted healing and happiness for her.

That was difficult for Ruby to understand, but not impossible for her to appreciate and a wave of gratitude washed over her as she finally leaned into Aurora's embrace and carefully reciprocated it with arms wrapped around her shoulders.

There was a warmth that built up behind Ruby's eyes. For a moment, fear rushed through her as she worried it might be the wolf trying to come out.

"We'll be in a nice, safe place very soon. You'll like the cabin we got, I promise."

The warmth turned out to be wetness. Swallowing down the thickness that clogged at her throat, Ruby scrunched up her eyes to try and keep back the tears, but some managed to snake their way down her cheeks as Aurora pulled away from the hug.

Not trusting her voice to come out steady or clear, Ruby just nodded and wormed her fingers under the glasses so she could wipe at her eyes. Wave upon wave of confusing emotions crashed over her and she couldn't figure out how to name or understand them. They felt hot like the tightness in her chest, cold like the flipping of her stomach, unsteady like the loss of balance threatening her legs, shaky like the tremors of her hands.

"Ruby?" Aurora was still holding her by the shoulders. "What's the matter?"

Ruby shook her head and sniffled. Removing her glasses she wiped at her eyes again.

"Belle?" Still not letting go of Ruby, Aurora turned to Belle.

"We…" Belle's voice was hesitant as she spaced her words out. "We… found… someone who offered to let us stay the night with them. She… she was kind to us."

Tiana had been more than kind to them, feeding them and accommodating them and all Ruby managed to do was make a scene and almost shift in that little apartment. It was beyond rude and Ruby felt the hot burn of shame as she recalled the incident.

"Ruby, may I tell them?"

They deserved to know how terrible of a guest Ruby really was. She nodded and continued to wipe at her eyes, hating how emotional she was being, hating how much of a scene she was making, hating how uncomfortable everyone was getting just because of her.

"We ended up talking about the facility." Belle still sounded hesitant. When Ruby's eyes cleared enough for her to look, she saw that Belle was wringing her hands and looking around at them while constantly throwing glances at Ruby. "It triggered a panic attack and Ruby's just… still... still  _affected_."

 _Bathroom_. Ruby wasn't sure if she said the word out loud or just thought it, but she turned away from them and walked past the Dr. Hopper-look-alike, ignoring how the sight of him made her legs nearly buckle. She stumbled her way in and leaned against the sink.

The pale face looking at her in the mirror had pink eyes framed by dark circles. But at least there was no yellow, just green.

And still, it felt strange to see that face. It didn't quite feel like hers. It still felt like someone else's. A part of her still thought she looked like the soft-faced girl with rounded cheeks and long brown hair. The skeletal creature looking at her now seemed more like a ghost than anything else.

A knock on the other side of the door preceded Belle's voice. "Ruby? Would you like me to come in?"

Pulling off her beanie and putting it down by the glasses on the counter, Ruby tried to wash her face, but no amount of water or scrubbing could hide her puffy eyes and pink nose. With a sigh, she opened the door to let Belle in.

She didn't speak right away, just closed the door behind her and leaned against it. Her hands were fidgeting with the jacket zipper again while she looked around the room, eventually settling for looking down at the floor.

The face in the mirror looked tired and half dead, with the sunken eyes and sharp cheekbones and skin riddled with scars. How could anyone stand to look at her? She could barely look at herself without cringing and closing her eyes or looking away.

"Do you want to talk about what's on your mind?" Belle finally asked.

Resisting the urge to swipe at the mirror and destroy the skeleton staring at her, Ruby instead turned away from the sink and leaned against the counter. "Don't know."

"Take your time." Belle pushed off from the door and walked over to the tissue dispenser, taking a few sheets and handing them to Ruby. "We're not in a hurry."

Accepting the tissue, Ruby dabbed at her eyes and her still-damp face before trying to speak again. "It's… a mess." She put the tissue down on the counter and rubbed at what little she still had of her hair. "I… I can't…"

She hated how hard it was to get the words out, hated how they always caught in her throat and came out jumbled and broken when they finally got to her mouth.

"Can't figure…" Ruby sighed, clenched her jaw, swallowed, tried to keep talking. "it… out."

"Do you want to talk through it now?" Belle asked.

They were in a bathroom in a coffeeshop. The others were outside wondering what was going on with their crazy pet monster and maybe Emma and her group were already there and waiting. They were  _waiting_. Ruby had made a scene and they were probably just waiting for it to wrap up.

She felt like a stupid drama queen and she hated how emotional she was being, how unsteady her hands were, how stiff her shoulders were, how soft her knees were, how warm her ears were, how wet her eyes were.

Ruby shook her head.

"Maybe later?"

Did she really want to try and figure out this jumbled mess?

Figuring it out might help keep her from making a scene like this again. Sighing again, Ruby looked at Belle. "Yeah. Later."

"Would you like a hug?"

Even if monsters shouldn't get hugs, Ruby nodded and allowed herself to be surrounded by Belle's embrace, allowed herself to feel the warmth of Belle's small frame, allowed herself to bury her face in Belle's shoulder. Allowed herself to shatter all over again. The tears wouldn't stop this time and the only sounds she could make were sobs that caught in her chest and built up into a heavy weight pushing against her torso and keeping her from breathing evenly.

* * *

Seeing Ruby crumble felt like a blade to the chest as her breaths came out in choked sobs and her hands clung to the hem of Belle's jacket. She kept her arms around Ruby, hoping the contact between them would help bring about a sense of safety and security that she hadn't known in years.

By the time Ruby's breathing had calmed and she'd managed to regain her composure, her eyes were red and puffy. Even after Belle encouraged Ruby to wash her face, there was still a sullen, defeated look to her lowered head and drooping shoulders.

At least her hands weren't covered in her own blood this time. Belle took that as a consolation as they finished up and left the bathroom.

Once outside, they found that Emma, Regina and Neal had arrived. The sight of them brought a thrill of excitement through Belle similar to what she'd felt upon seeing Aurora and Mulan again. Without stopping to think about it, Belle launched herself upon Emma and Regina, pulling them into a group hug that Aurora practically jumped in to join.

"Well… um. It's good to see you all too." Emma had stiffened at first, but started to melt into their arms. "Really good, actually."

Regina, not quite as relaxed as Emma, looked around at them. "Why did everyone get haircuts?"

"We…" Belle pulled away from the hug and reached out for Ruby's hand. She was hanging back and seemed to be feeling out of place. "We thought it would make us harder to find."

"Were we the only nerds then that didn't bother with disguises?" Emma turned to Neal, who shrugged.

Aurora released Emma and Regina before launching herself next at Neal. "At least we didn't waste time and money getting drunk and having close calls with the police."

"She has a point." Regina moved into the booth to sit next to the wall. "We maybe could have been a tad more careful..." She pointedly looked at Emma. "...and  _sober_."

Throwing her hands up in exaggerated exasperation, Emma moved in to sit next to Regina. "I wanted to enjoy myself! You try having boiled mush for like three damn years! And it's not my fault my tolerance is pretty much gone and I'm out of practice."

"Sssh!" Neal put a finger to his lips. "Are we trying to draw attention to ourselves?" He rolled his eyes and pulled a chair up to the table.

They quieted down and took their seats at the booth, Aurora, Mulan and Merida on one side, Regina, Emma and Ruby on the other side, Belle and Neal on extra chairs. Once the seating arrangements had been settled, Neal offered to go to the counter to order pastries and coffees for the group. Ruby still refused to have anything while Belle was still satisfied from her previous order.

"I'll just check on Killian." Aurora said, "Update him about where we are and find out when he can fetch us." After they acknowledged this, she leaned back against the booth and closed her eyes. Her brow furrowed with concentration, then there was subtle movement to her lips like she was speaking under her breath.

Afraid of distracting Aurora and breaking her concentration, Belle chose to stay quiet and just clasp Ruby's hand under the table. The rest of the group seemed to respectfully stay quiet as well.

They waited.

"Okay." Aurora opened her eyes and leaned forward on the table. "Killian is on his way now, I told him where we are and he'll be able to pick us up in about half an hour or so."

It almost felt surreal. Less than a week ago, she had been a prisoner being pressured into giving up the group's plans and secrets. About a month ago, she was planning to help a bunch of subjects escape Baelfire. And a lifetime ago, she was an excited intern.

How did things just turn around so fast?

It crossed her mind that if she felt overwhelmed by the turn of events, how must Papa feel? He didn't have any warning about what was going to happen. Maybe he had an inkling that Belle was up to something sketchy, but he would not have known that his daughter was going to be involved in a controversial breakout of subjects from Baelfire.

"Okay, I gotta get this off my chest." Emma spoke up, slapping a hand on the table and making Ruby and Merida flinch.

"We know." Neal rolled your eyes, "You're gay. That's old news."

"Fuck you, dude." Emma glared at Neal, but the exaggerated pout to her lips showed it was all in good fun. "Anyway." She turned her head to face Belle and pointed at her. "While we were off on our own adventures, Neal was monitoring the police scanners to make sure nobody got caught."

Neal took a sip from his coffee. "I mean of course I had to. If any of us ended up being apprehended by cops, we'd have to do a whole escape plan all over again."

"Says the group that had to be escorted out of a bar by bouncers." Aurora rolled her eyes.

That sent a flush to Emma's cheeks. "That guy was looking at Regina all wrong!" The excuses spluttered out of her as she waved her hands in the air and gestured towards Regina. "He totally would have done some asshole thing if I hadn't-"

"Relax, dear." Regina put a hand over Emma's shoulder and guided her back into leaning against her seat. "It's in the past now."

Scoffing, Emma folded her arms across her chest, "Fine. Anyway. As I was saying, before our  _Official Daydreamer_  and  _Resident Hacker_  both interrupted," Though there was a biting tone to her words, the smile playing at the corners of Emma's lips when she looked at Aurora showed there were no hard feelings.

It was strange how they had this connection with each other, how attached they were to each other despite how different they all were. Though the space they'd shared in each other's heads probably played a part in how attached Belle felt towards them, she knew a big part of it also involved the heavy and intense experiences they'd shared and survived together.

She hoped they could always be this close to each other.

"We heard this call a cop tried to make for backup when he had a run-in with two squatter women who basically broke his handcuffs and assaulted him." Emma was smirking now as she looked at Belle and Ruby. "The description he gave was 'Tall, skinny dyke with a scarred up face and...' wait for it..." Emma brought her hands up and paused dramatically, "'her short girlfriend'."

Belle huffed. "Why does everyone describe me as the  _short one_ , I mean really." Just as she said the words, it hit Belle that she was also labeled as Ruby's girlfriend. Ruby's  _girlfriend_.

And that was a concept Belle didn't know what to feel about.

They weren't girlfriends, that was the concrete fact.

But did Belle want to be?

"So that  _was_  you!" Emma clapped her hands with a bark of laughter. "Totally badass! The cop was furious with how you two just got away from him. You should have heard how mad he was, god!"

"Emma, could you talk any louder?" Neal reached over and flicked Emma's shoulder. She swatted his hand away and was about to stretch herself over the table until Regina pulled her back down just in time to avoid having glasses of frappe spilling all over the table.

" _Behave_  yourself," Regina shook her head at Emma. "You're acting like a child."

"Aren't I the youngest one here?" Emma winked. "I'm everyone's baby sister and I can get away with anything."

With an exasperated sigh, Regina rubbed at her forehead before taking another sip of her coffee. "I wouldn't say no to something stronger so I can have the resolve to deal with you."

Ever one to come up with something cheeky to say, Emma nudged Regina. "Please. You're into my whole bad girl thing."

Regina's cheeks flushed and her eyes widened. "Emma Swan!"

" _Wait_." There was a sudden serious tone to Emma as the smirk faded from her face and her eyes focused on the booth further down. Her jaw clenched. "They're talking about us."

Following Emma's gaze, Belle saw it was the same group of people that she had already overheard talking about Baelfire a while ago. "They've been at it since we got here."

"One of them thinks we're monsters." There was tension now to Emma's shoulders and she clenched her hands into fists. "He thinks we deserved to be locked up."

"Just leave it." For the first time since arriving, Merida spoke up, looking directly at Emma. "Don't dare make a scene."

Now that they were all focusing on the group talking about the facility, Belle could hear some of their conversation again and she hated what she could hear. One of them was playing footage that distinctly involved Mulan's yells of pain punctured by the sounds of solid objects impacting with flesh.

Belle looked over to Mulan, who had her elbow on the table and her forehead in her hand, a tense set to her clenched jaw.

"She was a guard working for them and she broke their protocols." It was the same person speaking out against the idea of the subjects having any semblance of rights to human treatment. "And don't get me started on how she got into fights with her peers in school. She's dangerous."

"Oh yeah?" Said someone else, a girl whose voice was rising in pitch as she got worked up. "How can you be okay with this?"

They played a video though Belle couldn't quite make out what was going on with the audio. The girl however was agitated enough to talk about the contents of the footage so Belle didn't have to guess what was being shown. "They were nearly drowning her! How is that okay? She was already chained up and they just-"

"Isn't that the werewolf?" Another speaker fired back, "She's the one who killed a classroom full of students in Storybrooke High!"

"How are you so sure that's her?"

"Look, someone dug up old newspapers that talk about this girl who went wild and killed a bunch of people in her class."

"But that one was a school shooting, I saw that article. The killer committed suicide after."

"Dude, they covered it up." A frustrated huff came out of the speaker as he continued with an exasperated tone. "It matches up! They probably hide her in that facility after she fucking lost her shit. Ruby Lucas is the name in the newspaper and Ruby Lucas is the name they said the werewolf might go by if we encounter it. That's not some fucking coincidence!"

Belle had enough of this.

She stood up and took Ruby by the shoulders, guiding her out of the booth. The way she clenched her fists and pressed them against her temples showed the struggle she was going through to stay in control. Her jaw was clenched tight and swelling in a familiar way that meant her wolf teeth were trying to set in.

"Let's get out of here." Belle led Ruby outside of the coffeeshop, chancing a glance over her shoulder to see that Mulan was helping to guide Merida, who also looked to be struggling to keep her beast under control. The flash of yellow in her eyes wasn't a good sign.

They made their way outside and gathered along the sidewalk, Mulan taking Merida's hands and breathing with her through the heightened emotions, whispering words of comfort and encouragement to her.

"I'm… I'm a…" Blood was starting to run down Ruby's arms from the claws she dug into her palms. Her clenched fists were starting to pound against her forehead. "Monster. Monster.  _Monster_!"

"Ruby, no." Belle placed her hands on Ruby's shoulders. Air was raggedly working its way in and out of Ruby as she fought for breath and her eyes flashed yellow. "Ssh, it's okay. Breathe. Please just breathe."

Though it was still a struggle for Ruby to steady her breathing, she was able to stop herself from pounding her fists against her head. Belle took her wrists and guided them away from her face. Slowly, Ruby managed to open her hands and present her healing but bloodied palms.

"I'm a monster." The words came out less breathy this time, but they were whined out in a tone that dripped with pain like the blood from her hands.

"You're not." Belle tightened her grip on Ruby's wrists. "You made a mistake and you've been paying for it for seven years." This was a conversation they were probably going to have many more times and Belle hoped she would never run out of patience for it. "Ruby, you're not a monster."

The tremors going through Ruby were starting to subside, leaving her with drooping shoulders and tired eyes. She looked to the side, towards Merida, who was also starting to calm down. "Mer…" Ruby's voice came out gurgled and rough, so she cleared her throat and tried again. "Merida."

Merida rubbed at her face and looked at Ruby.

"I'm…" Ruby licked her lips, took a step forward on unsteady legs that buckled under her. Belle caught Ruby by the arm, but she had managed to steady herself. "Merida, I'm…"

Though Merida's eyes had cleared back to blue, they were hard and cold as she stared at Ruby without saying anything.

"I'm sorry." There was a quiver to Ruby's chin as she leaned towards Merida and Mulan, a pleading look in those broken green eyes.

Easing Mulan's hands away from her, Merida shook her head. "Not now." Her own voice was a raspy croak.

Tension hung heavy in the air. They were all quiet for a while as Merida moved away from Mulan and hugged herself while Ruby took a few steps back and pushed her hands into her pockets, hopefully not so she could clench her hands into fists without Belle seeing.

Emma had a hand over her mouth and was looking from Ruby to Merida and back, very likely reading or overhearing their thoughts, maybe even feeling their emotions. The wide look to her eyes as they darted to and fro gave Belle the feeling that Emma was probably hearing more than she was supposed to. That was an invasion of Ruby and Merida's respective privacies, wasn't it?

Early on, they did have a talk with Emma and Aurora about consent when it came to using their abilities to read and feel each other. That should extend towards Ruby and Merida even if they had unresolved tension and unexpressed feelings. Even if Ruby struggled with communication.

Moving towards Emma, Belle decided now was as good a time as any to bring that discussion up again. If Merida needed her space for now, they should all give her that. She needed time to process the last few days where she went from festering intense hatred towards Ruby for seven years to suddenly escaping the facility with her help. Though they had cooperated with each other and Emma had facilitated a connection between them, there were probably still some leftover feelings of resentment and definitely still a lot of painful scars.

But a van started to pull up in front of them and the sight of it made Belle tense up, fearing that a team from Baelfire had come to capture them.

Then the window rolled down to present Killian's smirk. "How was school, kids?"

"Could have been better,  _dad_." Emma quipped, but it didn't have as much snark and spark as it usually did.

The excitement of finally being able to go to the hideout or safehouse or whatever it was supposed to be called felt drowned out by the heaviness they still felt. Ruby was quiet as she climbed into the back of the van and sat by the window. Belle followed and sat next to her. Mulan and Aurora joined them. Emma, Regina and Merida sat together in the row in front of them while Neal sat in the passenger seat next to Killian.

As Killian started to get the van moving, he looked at them through the rearview mirror. "Does the van stink or something? You're a sullen lot today."

An awkward silence followed Killian's comment as Belle (and probably the rest of the group) scrambled for something to say.

"I'm just bothered by how much guyliner you're wearing today." Emma finally spoke up. "Like really, are you trying to look like a raccoon or an emo teenager or an emo teenage raccoon?"

Killian raised an eyebrow. "Miss Swan, do you want me to turn this van around?"

"You could just step out and we can ask Aurora to drive." Emma's voice was starting to lighten up as she got into the swing of talking playfully again. "She'd give us one wild ride."

"What's  _that_  supposed to mean?" Aurora stomped her foot on the van's carpeting and straightened up, "I am a careful driver! Right, Mulan?"

Putting up her uninjured hand, Mulan shrugged, "I have the right to remain silent, ma'am." She couldn't help smiling as she spoke and pretended to flinch under Aurora's half-meant glare. "I can still love you even if I don't love your driving, right? Or is that a requirement?"

A loud, exaggerated gasp came out of Emma as she turned to face their row, hanging her arms over the back of her seat. "Mulan, did you just say what I think you said?"

The look on Mulan's eyes almost reminded Belle of a deer in the headlights. "I… What?"

"You said you loved Aurora!" Emma pointed at Belle, "You heard her, didn't you?"

Furrowing her brow in confusion, Belle tilted her head to one side, "Did she?" She tried to replay Mulan's words and did recall her saying something about loving Aurora without loving her driving, but that sounded like something even Belle would have said. What was the fuss Emma was making about it?

With a groan, Emma pressed her palm against her face. "Right, I forgot you're oblivious as hell." She turned to Aurora. "You heard it though, didn't you? I'm trying really hard not to overhear Mulan's thoughts but they're basically going  _RED ALERT! RED ALERT! RED ALERT_! right now."

"I- no," Mulan's face was turning red as she squirmed in her seat next to Aurora. "Now is not the time for this, Emma."

"What, were you hoping to do it in a more romantic setting? Candlelit dinner maybe?"

"Miss Swan, sit down properly and leave Mulan and Aurora alone." Regina's scolding tone sounded more teasing than genuinely angry, and she couldn't help adding, "They have to plan their motorcycle roadtrip first."

Coming to flustered Mulan's rescue, Aurora turned the spotlight back on Emma. "At least we don't dream about Regina feeding us bear claws while she's wearing some princess costume with a crown." Though Mulan looked relieved to have the attention shifted away from her, Belle had a feeling there was still a conversation to be had there.

She knew Aurora and Mulan had some feelings for each other, based on the connections they shared with each other leading up to their escape. The depth and seriousness of those feelings though was something Belle hadn't given too much thought into.

But thinking about how protective they were of each other and the quiet times they spent together, Belle figured it did make sense for some powerful feelings to develop. Powerful feelings like  _love_.

"Is this by any chance a Princess Leia costume?" Killian chimed in. "And not the white robe one?"

"It's not a princess costume!" It was Emma's turn to be flustered as Regina stared at her with a wide open mouth. "It's a…  _queen_ … costume?"

As the banter continued on back and forth the rest of the way, Belle found herself feeling lighter. It was exciting to be so close now to their final destination. Being back in the company of these people she cared so much about was warming. Hearing the joking and good-natured teasing was lightening.

But a glance towards Ruby showed that she was still feeling down, quietly looking out the window and leaning her head against the glass.

Belle reached out a hand to hold Ruby's. She hesitated at first, then allowed Belle to interlace their fingers before glancing at her and trying to smile. It was stiff and forced, weighed down by the bags under her eyes and the tinge of pink still there from crying.

"We'll be okay." Belle whispered, just soft enough for only Ruby to hear.

Unable to maintain the smile, Ruby let it fall. She nodded before returning her gaze to the window.

* * *

"Move, 204!" The order was delivered in a raised voice that made her hands tremble as she scrambled out from under the bed as fast as she could. "Up against the wall!" Threatening sparks of electricity came from Gaston's prod, just waiting for the right moment to touch her skin if she moved too slowly for his liking.

The subject hissed as her back grazed the bed in her hurry to get out, but she ignored it and let it heal at its own accelerated pace while she stood facing the wall.

"Hands behind your back!" The sparks sounded closer, and she feared her legs would buckle under her out of pure fear. They thankfully kept her upright as Gaston linked her cuffs behind her back then hooked the chains to her collar before he startled her by grabbing a fistful of her hair.

She bit back a yelp as he pulled her head backwards, making her scalp prickle with pain and her neck stretch out.

"Hold still."

Something was brought towards her face. Her heart pounded against her chest as the object was put over her mouth then buckled behind her head with rough hands that caught strands of her hair in the straps. When Gaston was done, the subject realized it was a muzzle and had to fight back the initial wave of distress and disgust.

She reminded herself that she was a dangerous monster and this was a necessary precaution.

Moving his hand from her hair to her shoulder, Gaston yanked the subject away from the wall and shoved her through the door where the other guards were already prepared with their tight grips on her chains

The muzzle was new.

Did they have a test today that might make it harder for her to avoid biting someone? Was it going to be an intensive physical test like the strength and endurance ones or a more mental test like the ones for her senses?

She hoped it would be the latter since she still felt sore from lifting objects and pushing pressure plates not so long ago.

And she wasn't looking forward to another appointment in the shower rooms just yet.

But as they entered the elevator and went up to an unfamiliar hall with carpeting on the floor, she had even less of a guess as to what to expect. Her stomach twisted into itself as they neared a door and stopped so Gaston could knock on it and announce their presence.

"Bring her in." Dr. Gold's voice came in through the speaker next to the scanner the guards used to unlock and open the door.

She was dragged into a room with a long table full of men and women dressed in sharp suits, all turning their heads to stare at her. Their eyes felt like knives digging into her skin and slicing through her stomach. There were some raised eyebrows, a few frowns and a few masked expressions that almost looked bored or unimpressed.

"Move!" Gaston jerking the subject forward, marching her down the room to position her in front of the projector screen. The pictures being flashed were of the subject herself, lifting the heavy block above her head, next to data about the weights she could push and lift. Below, there was a picture of a wolf with dark fur and yellow eyes, pulling against chains hooked up to a collar ruffling its mane and cuffs around its forelegs.

Her chest felt like it was going to explode with how violently her heart was bouncing around all over the place.

She wanted to escape this room. They were all staring at her. They were all well-dressed and well-pressed while she had thick, greasy hair, a thin hospital gown and dirty bare feet. Her skin crawled as she tried to move back towards the door, only for Gaston to yank on the chains to keep her in place.

"That's 204?" A bald man toyed with his pen and leaned back in his chair. "Gold, why the need for the muzzle and chains? I thought you said she was under control."

"Leekie." Dr. Gold's mouth was set in a thin line as he straightened up and held his hands behind his back, "More time and resources are required for her to reach a greater level of control."

A woman was looking the subject up and down through narrowed eyes. "And you really believe you're able to develop a program that can harness her ability without the loss of control?"

The subject looked towards Dr. Gold, not quite understanding the question. Did harnessing her abilities mean getting her to use them more or learning to turn them off or learning to control them?

The thin line of Dr. Gold's lips curved upwards into a smile that kept going until his gold teeth were flashing. "I'm confident in that, yes. We've run similar experiments and I believe we will have the greatest success with 204."

"Is it really worth it?" An older man had his arms folded across his chest. "Sure, she can run more than normal, lift more than normal. Some people can be trained into that and some people are already capable of that."

Dr. Gold took several steps towards the subject but kept his gaze on the people at the table. "She has a greater ability which I have yet to run thorough tests for, but the instances I've seen of this particular gift…" A chuckle rumbled in Dr. Gold's chest, "Her manifestation of it is superior to those of other subjects I've encountered so far."

There was a mixture of doubt and curiosity in the raised eyebrows and pursed lips of the faces watching them.

Her heart doubled its efforts to scramble out of her chest as Dr. Gold finally turned to face her.

What was he going to do? What was she supposed to do? They hadn't talked about this or planned this or trained her to be ready for some public presentation. She could barely stand in front of class to talk about the history of America without having to swallow back the urge to throw up. How was she supposed to do some action for this crowd of adults in suits without fainting?

"Watch." Dr. Gold was more gentle than the guards as he positioned the subject so it was her side that was facing the audience. He rolled up the sleeve of her gown to expose her shoulder.

Then she saw the glint of a blade and nearly bolted. The only thing holding her in place was fear of hurting Dr. Gold if she made a sudden move.

That and her fear of Gaston and the way he brandished his prod.

Her breath caught in her throat as the blade pressed against her skin, cutting it open and letting blood start to slither down her skin. Dr. Gold didn't stop with the initial penetration of the blade, he continued by moving down her arm until she had a gash from shoulder to elbow.

There were a few grasps from the crowd.

The room was starting to fade in and out and her eyes were starting to heat up, but she forced herself to stay still and breathe through the intense urge to shove her shoulder into Dr. Gold and attempt to bite him despite the muzzle over her face.

There came this freezing, burning kind of feeling as the skin stitched itself back together, closing the wound until leftover blood was the only sign that there had ever been a cut in the first place.

She stumbled but was able to catch herself, heavy breaths echoing in the muzzle.

"Her healing rate is incredible." Dr. Gold wasn't looking at her anymore. "I've scheduled some tests later this week to record the different rates for different levels of silver-infused blades, but this alone shows great potential."

"You had a project, didn't you?" The bald man started speaking again, "For developing medicine and alternative treatments?"

Dr. Gold was so close and she wished he could pull her away from this place and bring her back to her room so she could hide under her bed and calm down because her chest was just about ready to explode and shoot out her panicking heart. The flips and twists of her stomach was making bile rise up to her throat. She forced herself to swallow it down, but heat was already building up behind her eyes.

"Yes. We've made progress with that project already but I believe she can bring our research forward by leaps and bounds."

A growl reverberated in her tight chest. Her jaw was tensing up and her teeth felt too big for her mouth. The burning behind her eyes was building up and spreading over her skull.

She lunged towards the door, only to be pulled back by tautness on the chains. Jolts of electricity fired through her body, causing her muscles to twitch and her body to contort while a needle plunged into her skin and clouded her mind until it faded into blackness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew. WHAT ARE YOUR EXPECTATIONS FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER NOW THAT THE TEAM HAS REUNITED AND IS ON ITS WAY TO THE HIDEOUT?


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEW! Sorry for the wait. This chapter is dedicated to Leticia and Megan, who kept me writing when I kept getting distracted or moody. Y'all are great cheerleaders.

As they continued to drive along, Ruby couldn't help but look at every house, every alley, every tree and every trash can where guards or scientists may be hiding. Her muscles stayed tense in case Killian stopped the car so Gaston could climb in and shoot her. Her ears stayed alert for any sound of electric prods or the crackle of the guards' radios. Her nose was ready for even just a trace of the scents of any of the staff that had been assigned to her throughout her stay at the facility.

This might just be some trap waiting to be sprung, or a test she was horribly failing.

And the subject had to be ready if it came to that.

When they stopped over somewhere, Ruby had to resist the urge to scramble out of her seat and dive out the window. Belle noticed the tension and pressed a hand against the subject's lap, calling her attention.

"We're just going to order some food." Belle explained. "Would you like a burger?"

Forcing her muscles to relax was no easy feat. The subject pushed her back against the seat and shakily let out a breath.

She was Ruby Lucas again.

Ruby Lucas was free and safe with friends.

Still not trusting her voice to be steady, Ruby just nodded.

"A soda as well maybe?"

She nodded again.

They relayed their orders to Killian, who got frustrated when Emma kept changing her mind and interrupting while he was talking to the guy at the counter of the drive thru. After that, the rest of the trip was relatively uneventful. They ate their food and engaged in more banter that Ruby mostly tuned out.

There was a point when most of them started to doze off. Ruby herself wasn't sure if she stayed awake the whole trip. She felt like she was in and out of short durations of sleep. When she noticed Belle sleeping with her head on Ruby's shoulder, she couldn't recall when that came about. Not that she minded. A shoulder for Belle to doze on was a small way to repay her for being so supportive and encouraging and helping to free Ruby from the facility.

Eventually, the asphalt road gave way to more of a dirt path with trees on either side. Ruby couldn't recall when they left the main city area and figured she might have fallen asleep again.

At least these naps were generally free of any dreams. She would rather not relive facility days in a van full of people who were sure to hear her screaming and see her thrashing if she started having nightmares again.

The road grew to be uneven. Large trees surrounded their landscape, growing in numbers and size as they travelled further. This new environment piqued Ruby's interest. She found herself perking up and looking out the window at the sprawling expanse of grass and trees. It was more of nature than she'd ever seen in her life. There were woods in Storybrooke but she never really went there and the park didn't have such a dense covering of foliage.

They arrived at a gate made of thick dark bars under a wooden arch. Killian stopped the van so Neal could go out and open the gate to let them through.

Still battling the paranoia, Ruby scanned their surroundings for any sign of guards or scientists while Neal got back into the van. When nothing happened as Killian continued driving, Ruby tried to focus instead on how beautiful the scenery was.

There were more trees and plants than Ruby could name or describe. All she saw were clumps of green all over the place and it looked strange to her eyes that were still so much more used to the greys, blacks and whites of the facility.

As a cabin came into view, Ruby also caught sight of the triplets playing with a ball. It took some scrounging for her to find the right word in her broken mind-  _soccer_. They were playing soccer. A black and white ball was being passed around with their feet and every so often one of them would show off by kicking the ball upwards and leaping high up into the air to headbutt it back to the ground.

A woman came out of the cabin and gestured for the boys to get out of the way so Killian could park the van. Merida had straightened up and was now pressing herself against the window, almost trembling with pent up energy.

The moment Killian unlocked the door, Merida yanked the door open with a loud bang that reminded her of strength she may have forgotten she had. With a grimace she checked the door for damage, seemed to find none, and charged straight for the cabin.

Ruby tensed up at the sight of Merida leaping upon the woman. This was the worst time for Merida to lose control of the bear and attack the nearest human.

But there was no growling and no bloodshed.

As they started filing out of the van, Ruby got a better look at what was happening. It wasn't an attack at all. The woman was probably Merida's mother. They were all over each other, switching between embracing each other to gazing at each other to embracing again. Mrs. Dunbroch then began to smother Merida in kisses all over her forehead and cheeks, even nuzzling the top of her shaved head.

Ruby followed the group as they walked up the steps to the porch. Realizing she was still staring at Merida and her mom for a length of time that was probably inappropriate, Ruby looked towards the trees. There were so many. The wolf wanted to run through the foliage and sniff and paw at all the things.

Still not too comfortable with the wolf, Ruby swallowed back the urge and looked again towards mother and daughter. They were still wrapped up in each other but now they were touching foreheads, tears on both their faces.

"I'm so glad you're safe." The whisper was in a shaky voice as Merida's mother stroked her daughter's damp cheeks.

"I missed you, mum." Merida closed her eyes and moved closer, transitioning back into an embrace as she buried her face into her mother's shoulder.

Ruby had to remind herself once more not to stare. There was a tight feeling in her chest that almost felt like an uncomfortable mixture of guilt and jealousy.

She had torn up what little they had tried to build of a normal life. Merida had expressed that much during the confrontation fueled by Dr. Gold.

Ruby ruined their lives.

What right did she have to be jealous of that closeness between mother and daughter?

Then Mrs. Dunbroch looked up from Merida and focused her eyes on Ruby. It was uncomfortable and she felt like she was being scrutinized. They probably knew she had been staring and didn't like it. They probably hated her for the mess she made of their lives. The whole family probably hated Ruby as much as Merida did.

"Could you come closer, dear?" The woman eased herself away from Merida and took a step towards Ruby.

It was difficult to read the Mrs. Dunbroch's expression, but Ruby didn't want to cause more trouble than she already had and instead did what she was told. With legs that could buckle at any moment, she approached, arms wrapped around herself, gaze averted. The last thing she wanted to do was look threatening or aggressive.

When Ruby chanced a glance at Mrs. Dunbroch, it was with surprise to note complete softness in her expression. There was tenderness from the way she smiled to the way her eyes shone with still more tears.

She opened her arms, gesturing for Ruby to come closer, coaxing her into an embrace.

"I don't blame you." The woman's body was warm and welcoming and soft and Ruby felt her knees go weak as she leaned into the contact. "I don't blame you for what happened to my daughter or to any of my sons."

With the tightness in her throat and the trembling of her lips, Ruby knew better than to attempt to speak. Any words that might try to form would only get stuck in her throat or flop out awkwardly.

"You're as much a victim as any of us." The woman began to stroked the prickles of hair at the back of Ruby's head. "I hope you can heal from those stolen years."

The tightness in her throat increased and she felt her still puffy eyes warming up all over again. Ruby bit her lip and tried to hide her face in the woman's shoulder, willing her eyes not to shed the tears.

Mrs. Dunbroch eased back from the hug but kept her arms on Ruby, and glanced towards Merida. "I hope we can  _all_ heal from those stolen years."

Fighting a losing battle of keeping the tears at bay, Ruby eased back into the embrace, clutching at the woman's shirt and breaking into sobs all over again.

* * *

It was a relief to see the rest of the Dunbrochs, or at least Mrs. Dunbroch, receiving Ruby with open arms. She needed that. If anyone so closely tied to her past could help her move past it, it would be Merida. But Merida herself still needed more time to heal and forgive. The cooperation they shared during the escape was born out of urgency and necessity. Now that there was time for reflection, Merida seemed to still be on the fence about forgiving Ruby.

Merida's father, Fergus, opened the door and made it to Merida in two big strides, scooping her up in his massive arms and covering her with his kisses and his beard.

Not wanting to interrupt the family reunion, Belle decided to follow Killian in going ahead into the cabin, only to walk right into his back. He didn't even react.

"Sorry," Belle moved around him and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw what had caused Killian to freeze. She distantly felt someone also walking into her.

"I…" Killian's voice was several pitches higher as he finally found his voice. "I didn't think anyone else would… I didn't expect… I…" He trailed off as he struggled to gather up his scattered thoughts.

"Nana?" Aurora's shock was clear in her voice as she made her way around the crowd of stunned people blocking the doorway. "Gran? Gramma?"

The three older women swarmed over Aurora, crowding over her and fussing over her. For a while, all that could be seen of the cluster were the Grannies' matching shawls of green, red and blue.

"Have you been eating well?"

"Did you get enough sleep?"

"Are you hungry now?"

"Did you have any trouble?"

"Was it a safe ride? Did Killian drive properly?"

Killian spluttered then. For a moment, his shoulders tensed up like he was going to retort and try to argue his case, but he visibly restrained himself. Brushing his hair back and adjusting his weight from one foot to the other seemed to help him reset himself. He rolled his shoulders back and waited for Aurora's grandmothers to finish fussing over her.

Once they started turning to face everyone else, Killian took it upon himself to try again at asking, "I don't mean to sound brash, mates, but… what are you doing here?"

"You work for us." Gramma Flora held a twinkle in her eye as she adjusted her red shawl. "Technically speaking."

"You were coordinating with Iago," Nana Fauna was still fussing over Aurora's hair, adjusting the strands that hadn't been cut so cleanly. "Aurora, dear, if you want, I can refine whatever haircut this is supposed to be."

"You worked for Iago. He works for us." There was a notably more aggressive tone to Gran Merriweather that suggested she wasn't particularly fond of Killian. "So via the chain of command, some of the jobs you did were done for us."

"But…" Killian's eyebrows went up so high they almost touched his hairline while his hand rubbed at the back of his neck. He took a moment to gather his thoughts before addressing the grannies. "But you saw us when we were at Aurora's apartment. You saw  _me_. You didn't… say anything?

Nana Fauna shrugged while Gramma Flora shook her head. "It was not the right time."

"So this is…" Belle still wasn't quite sure what was going on, but she wanted to give her thanks where it was due. "This is your cabin? And you don't mind us staying here for a while? That's very kind of you and we're very grateful."

"Just for a while." Gran Merryweather grumbled just softly enough for Belle to do a double take and doubt if it was really what she heard.

Gramma Flora cast a glance at Merryweather before answering the question. "You may stay for as long as you need. We hope the provided accommodations will suffice. The cabin is relatively well-stocked but Killian should be able drive into town for more supplies if necessary." She raised an eyebrow at Ruby and then eyed the Dunbrochs. "I'm sure they will be ravenous."

Belle felt relief settle in her gut at how Gramma Flora at least didn't say the wolf and the bears or the subjects.

"What about after _a while_?" Regina kept her tone cool and neutral, but the stiff way she kept her back straight gave away her tension. It was something Belle would not have noticed at all had she not spent some time sharing thoughts and feelings with Regina.

Because of Emma, Belle knew certain ticks that everyone had that gave away some of their thoughts without them even being part of Emma's link. Neal touched his face when he was nervous, often covering his mouth. Emma got loud when she was scared, to mask signs of weakness with displays of bravado. Mulan got quiet when she was angry, but often tried to think through a situation and sort her feelings out.

"What do you mean?" Aurora asked.

"We can't hide in this cabin forever," Regina continued, still in the same level voice, though now there was a stiffness to the set of her jaw as well. "At some point we're going to have to go out and live lives and earn money and be able to provide for ourselves."

There was a pause, as Regina took a breath and seemed to choose her words with more care. She addressed Aurora's three grandmothers. "We're grateful to you, of course. You're showing us a great deal of kindness and hospitality. I'm just…" Regina shifted her weight then looked around at the group of people now gathered in the cabin's lobby. "I'm just saying that it wouldn't do for us to grow dependent on their money and their resources. My concern is how we can move forward from here."

"A lot of people are displeased with our actions." Mulan spoke up, still cradling her hand close to her stomach. Belle wondered if Regina could do more work on that hand and try to further repair it. Hopefully complications weren't going to arise from the less than natural healing that Regina put it through. "A lot of people would prefer supernaturals and psychics to stay in facilities. It's a danger for us to be outside, but I think we should find a way to leave. Go further away from the heat stirred up by the breakout. Further from the people looking for us."

A protest gathered up in Belle's chest at Mulan's suggestion of leaving. They had nowhere to go and crossing any borders might just get them caught. And on top of that, Belle would rather not find herself even further away from Papa.

But Mulan knew what was at stake, didn't she?

She still had her twin brother, alone in their home, struggling to defend his sister from the backlash stirred up by the breakout.

"We think it may be best to stay under the radar for a while." Nana Fauna answered, her voice and demeanor noticeably softer and gentler than those of the other grannies. "There's some movement towards discrediting Baelfire and also a great deal of protest over the call for your arrests."

Gramma Flora nodded. "We think there may still be hope of you being able to go back to Maine and resume your lives as best you can. But that will still be sometime from now and things need to settle first."

"Our lovely hosts have got a point." Mr. Dunbroch's booming voice seemed to echo in the cabin.

"Inside voice, dear." Mrs. Dunbroch whispered.

With a sheepish smile, Mr. Dunbroch continued, "I think it's best we have everyone settle into their rooms and get familiar with the place. We can talk some more over dinner, perhaps?"

"Perhaps." Nana Fauna said.

"We won't be staying for dinner." Gran Merryweather said. "We still have a few other appointments to attend to."

"We're actually running late for one and should get going soon." Gramma Flora glanced at her watch then adjusted her shawl.

Aurora's face fell. "You're leaving already?"

"We're sorry, dear." Gramma Flora touched Aurora's shoulder. "We really just dropped by to see you. We're hoping to drop by again for a longer visit in a couple of days."

"Wait!" Emma's voice came out louder than it should have and she seemed to realize that since she fidgeted with her hands and touched her face before rubbing the back of her neck. "I… I have a question. For Aurora's grannies."

The three women turned to face Emma.

"What  _are_ you guys?"

"Emma!" Aurora's face looked about as scandalized as her voice sounded.

"No!" Emma ran her hands through her hair then adjusted her stance and put her hands on her hips. "I mean like… are you psychic too? Or like supernatural of some sort or… like are you mafia bosses or… like hitwomen?"

"Emma, you're toeing the line." Regina's voice was a low warning.

"We're fairies."

"Like  _real_ fairies?" Belle asked, blasted by a new sense of fascination as she eyed them. They didn't look like the small, skinny, earthy creatures Belle normally associated with fairies. There were records of various cryptids and confirmed supernaturals (like werewolves like Ruby) but fairies hadn't quite been heard of yet.

"Belle, you don't bat an eye with werewolves and werebears and psychics but somehow fairies are where you draw the line?" Emma's snarky tone was thrown over, accompanied by a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

Aurora put her hands over her mouth and took a few steps back. "So all this time, you were fairies? And… and what about the plans I was making with Killian and Belle and everyone? Did you know about everything this whole time?"

Nana Fauna shrugged, "Well not everything. And not the whole time."

"Yes," Gramma Flora nodded, "Not the whole time. But we were keeping tabs on Killian and when he started going through his contacts for places to stay and vehicles to use, we figured it out and started to help with pulling strings."

Emma raised her hand.

Gramma Flora's brow furrowed but she nodded her head to Emma.

"That still doesn't explain how you're loaded as fuck and managed to pull all those strings for Emo Teenage Raccoon."

" _Language_!" Neal swatted Emma's shoulder. She brushed him off but did look just a bit sheepish in how she rubbed at the back of her neck and threw a half smile at Regina.

"We can conjure pixiedust." Gramma Flora looked just a tad ruffled by Emma, but let it slide. Nana Fauna seemed more amused than anything else. Gran Merryweather's furrowed brow showed her annoyance. "Our pixiedust is a key component in the potions we make."

"Our potions are then sold, generally under different labels," Nana Fauna continued. "Sometimes to alternative medicine stores, sometimes to so-called magic shops, sometimes to…" She pursed her lips and glanced at Gramma Flora. "...well… less than savory buyers."

"Sometimes we discreetly sell to facilities that we think might do good with it." Gran Merryweather added. "Sometimes we just sell in our own alternative medicine shop."

Gramma Flora adjusted her red shawl. "It's how our kind has learned to adapt to the modern world."

Emma raised her hand again. The grannies looked noticeably more exasperated this time, but Gramma Flora still nodded and awaited the next question.

"So are you basically drug lords?"

Belle stared at Emma, scandalized. And wasn't the only one who was. Neal's jaw had dropped, Killian's eyes were wide open, Mulan's brows were lowered, Aurora had her hands over her mouth.

" _Emma_ ," Regina's tone was low and there wasn't any hint of teasing to it anymore. "I think you and I need to have a conversation on  _tact_."

Cringing, Emma waved her hands in the air. "Okay, okay! Quit blasting me with all your disapproval. God, I was just asking questions and clarifying shit. I can't read them and I wanna understand."

Belle's eyes widened. "You can't read them?" The revelation was a fascinating one that started up a whole new train of thought. Were they difficult for Emma to read because they had better defenses than anyone else? Or were they impossible for Emma to read because they weren't quite human and therefore had a different wavelength that Emma couldn't reach? On that note, could Emma read animals? She was able to read Ruby in both human and wolf form, if Belle had recalled correctly. Did that make Ruby more human and more on the wavelength that Emma could read while the fairies and maybe other beings and other creatures were unreadable?

"Belle, you absolute nerd." Emma interrupted Belle's thoughts. "I can't read animals, no. I can kind of feel them but I generally can't understand them. With the fairy grannies, it's like… I just…  _can't_."

"Well if you're through talking about us and trying to invade our privacies attempting to read us," Gran Merryweather straightened out her skirt and squared her shoulders. "We'll be taking our leave. We're already running late."

"Wait!" Aurora mimicked Emma and raised a hand. "Can I ask a question too?"

They were noticeably warmer towards Aurora and Gramma Fauna responded with a soft voice that radiated her fondness for her (granddaughter?), "Of course, dear." Belle still didn't quite understand how they were related to Aurora.

"If you're fairies…" A frown was on Aurora's face as she formulated her question and seemed to dread the answer. "How… how are we related?  _Are_ we related?"

Gramma Flora exchanged a look with Gran Merryweather. When the latter nodded, the former started to speak, "Our kind generally doesn't mix so much with humans, but it does happen sometimes. Merryweather had a stint with a human several centuries back. It didn't last very long, but it did result in a child."

"Since then, the family tree has grown and branched out." Nana Fauna put a hand on Aurora's shoulder, "We don't always get involved, but from time to time, we check in. There have been a few other psychics in your family tree, but none have accomplished the great things you have when you played a key part in helping these people."

"We don't do this for all the descendants." Gran Merryweather said, "Because by the gods, we don't have the time for that."

Emma raised her hand again. This time Gran Merryweather couldn't help her exasperated groan.

Gramma Fauna rolled her eyes and sighed. "Yes, Emma?"

"How do you not have time? If you banged a human centuries ago, you're fucking  _immortal_ with all the damn time in the world!" Emma flinched under Regina's glare (and probably a bunch of blasted telepathic messages of disapproval, as well). Straightening up, Emma tried to explain herself for tactfully. "I'm just… wondering, I guess? What do you spend all those centuries doing?"

This time it was Gran Merryweather to answer. "Because humans can and  _will_ reproduce with just about anything with a heartbeat. Sometimes even  _without_ a heartbeat. This family line has branched out to just about everywhere and we're not so inclined to check on every single twig in that gigantic tree." She looked Emma up and down. "As for what we prefer to spend our time doing, that's something you don't particularly need to know."

"Mostly, we check in on our businesses." Nana Fauna added in a gentler, friendlier tone.

"So you're not…  _exactly_ my grannies." Aurora seemed to be more at ease than she was a moment ago, but still clearly thrown off by the new information. "But we're still distantly related?"

"Yes and no." Gran Flora answered. "We may not, in human technicality, be your grandmothers, but we're still related to you. And we still took part in your life as your grandmothers, did we not?"

Aurora nodded, a small smile taking form on her lips. "You did."

"We took a liking to your grandmother and stuck around when you came along." Nana Fauna said. "Your father actually has some psychic ability similar to yours but he's in deep denial of it. We were surprised though by the extent of yours and wanted to assist you but your abilities only manifested this powerfully when the facility incidents came into play."

"We hope you can understand." Gramma Flora added.

Emma raised her hand one more time and this time most of the group let out an exasperated groan. Although if Belle were to be honest with herself, she wondered about some of Emma's questions as well and was just about as invested in hearing the answers.

 _Of course you're curious as fuck about this shit too._ You're  _the major nerd here._

"Are other psychics also descended from fairies and other supernaturals?" Emma asked, this time noticeably more careful with her words. Until she added her follow up questions. "Are Aurora and I related? Are  _Regina_ and I related? I'm not sure how I feel about banging a distant cousin tonight."

"Yes. No and no." Gran Merryweather answered curtly, then turned to Aurora, tone much kinder. "If you don't mind, Aurora, dear, your three grannies should get going."

"Okay." Aurora exhaled and straightened up. "Okay. Can we talk some more though? When you come by again?"

Gramma Flora kissed Aurora's forehead, a tender hand on her cheek. "Of course, my little rose."

"I have one more question."

"God fucking dammit, Emma." Killian pinched the bridge of his nose. "If they fire me, I'm going to blame you."

"Yes, Emma?" It was Nana Fauna who took it upon herself to address Emma since Gran Merryweather had scoffed and started to walk towards the door.

"How are you three related?" Emma was flinching again like Regina was blasting telepathic reprimands. Brushing it off, Emma took a step forward. "Are you like  _sisters_ or  _just friends_  or like… y'know…  _gaying it out_  together?"

Gran Merryweather was already out the door, but Nana Fauna and Gramma Flora exchanged a look. Stifling a giggle, Nana Fauna headed outside as well. As she left, she said something under her breath that vaguely sounded like " _Humans_."

"Yes." Gramma Flora was also smiling and unless Belle had imagined it, winked, before following the other two fairies outside.

With a poof of pink, green and blue smoke, they were gone. Just like that.

"Wait, what?" Emma's voice rose in pitch. "Yes to what?"

"I always did wonder how they got around since I never saw them with a car." Aurora had a hand on her chin, her tone thoughtful. "No wonder they never said yes when I asked them to teach me how to drive."

"Explains why you can't drive at all." The quip was out of Belle's mouth before she could stop herself.

Aurora turned on Belle. "At least I can reach the wheel!"

"Ahem." Mr. Dunbroch cleared his throat. It was loud enough to call their attention and quiet anymore banter and bickering. "Now that all of that is out of the way, I think it's best we all get settled into our rooms. There are some spare clothes in each of the rooms, all donated by the fairies. We can always acquire more if necessary."

Mrs. Dunbroch had her arms around Merida again, but spoke clearly enough to address everyone. "There aren't that many rooms here so we will have to share. Merida, you'll be staying in one of the bigger rooms, with your brothers. It has two bunkbeds for the four of you. It's just across the room that your father and I are staying in, just down that hall over there."

"Right." Killian pointed to another room down the hall. "Aurora and Mulan, you've got the room next to the Dunbrochs. Neal and I will be across you. Emma and Regina, you're in the room upstairs, on the east side. There's a small library in the middle. Then after that it's Belle and Ruby's room."

Belle had a feeling that Ruby and Merida were purposely assigned rooms as far away from each other as possible. It may be a good measure considering the tension that still existed between them.

"You can get settled in, then at around six, whoever wants to help us prepare dinner should come to the kitchen to help." Mrs. Dunbroch said, "I expect us to all be at the table and ready for dinner at seven."

* * *

There was an earthy scent to the air that she hadn't experienced before, but Ruby enjoyed how it soothed her senses and relaxed the tension in her muscles. This environment was where she was meant to be. It felt like home. The cool air calmed her and the warm scents of leaves and soil, of  _nature_ , energized her.

The atmosphere in the cabin didn't detract from outside. If anything, it seemed to add to it, with the woody smell of the walls and flooring and the open windows that allowed a gentle breeze to circulate.

Trying to take everything in, Ruby walked forward, running her hands over the walls and paintings in the room she was to share with Belle. The wood felt so strange against her fingertips. It was polished enough to be smooth, but it wasn't a slippery kind of smooth like pretty much every surface in the facility. And the colors were so warm and comforting. Seeing all the shades of brown was just bizarre.

But it was a good kind of bizarre. One she hoped to get used to some day.

There was a series of various symbols and scenes lining the wall. A lake full of birds, with a swan curling its elegant head to look at the flock, a golden crown upon her head. A woman in an elegant gown and a decorated crown, sitting in a throne room painted in warm colors and surrounded by smiling people. A woman in armor, waving a sword as she rode towards the viewer on a massive black horse. A princess sleeping on an elaborately decorated bed while little glowing orbs floated around her. A teacup with the smallest puppy imaginable sleeping inside it. A child in a red cloak.

Ruby wasn't sure how they were connected or what any of them meant, but she liked looking at them.

"Are you feeling better?" Belle asked flopping onto the bed. She tapped her palm against the mattress, inviting Ruby to join her.

Hesitant at first, Ruby feared that being close to Belle would be dangerous.

It took a moment for Ruby to remind herself that she had spent several days in very close proximity to Belle and nothing happened. Nothing major anyway. There were those two close calls. But… they got through it without incident, didn't they?

With slow, uncertain steps, Ruby brought herself closer to the bed and eased herself onto it. A soft gasp escaped her lips as she realized how amazingly soft it was.

Her paws- her  _hands_ sank into the softness like nothing she'd felt in her years in the facility. The covers and the mattress barely resisted as she pressed her fingers in. It just… absorbed everything. Once her full weight was on the mattress, she felt like she was floating.

She was floating.

It was  _so_ soft.

 _Soft!_ Ruby pressed her face against the bed and slid forward until she was lying on her stomach, embracing the softness, enjoying the softness, absorbing the softness,  _living_ in the softness. Closing her eyes, she wished she could just be engulfed in the softness forever. It was like she was just floating away on a cloud.

"A real bed does feel nice, doesn't it?" weight shifted on the bed as Belle adjusted herself.

Remembering that Belle had asked a question, Ruby opened her eyes and wasn't sure which question to answer first. She crossed her arms in front of her to prop her head and look at Belle.

"Bed… feels…" The words were still hard to get out, but she tried to power through as best she could. "...n-nice. Yes."

Belle nodded and smiled, easing herself onto the pillow.

"I feel… I…" Ruby frowned at how the answer kept getting stuck. "I f-feel… better."

"Yeah?" Belle brightened up at that, and Ruby felt a mixture of feelings. She liked that she was able to bring out such a beautiful smile, but she also knew that she wasn't quite feeling  _okay_ yet. There were still nagging thoughts and a heaviness in her stomach she could only  _sometimes_ forget.

"Yeah." Ruby nodded, then tried to add to the answer. "But… b-but… I still feel…" She gestured her hands in a vague circle and then at herself. "...a… mess…?"

"That's okay." Belle didn't look disappointed at all. There was only understanding in her eyes. "Do you wanna talk about it a bit before we head out to help with dinner?"

Ruby looked down at the mattress and ran her fingers through the covers. "I s-still… I feel…" She looked up at Belle. "...like… S-subject... 2…" There was still a big part of her that felt more like the number than the name, but even then, it felt difficult to say it out loud. "204."

As she spoke, Ruby realized that she was afraid of disappointing Belle.

From the very beginning, Belle and all of them had been putting all their effort and energy into getting Ruby to call herself  _Ruby_ instead of 204. There were still many reasons to feel like Ruby was a name that a monster didn't deserve and the number 204 was more appropriate.

But there were also a good number of reasons that a creature such as herself deserved a second chance at life and humanity and a name.

It was just hard to remember those reasons sometimes.

"I'm sorry." Ruby whimpered, unable to look at Belle.

"Hey, hey." Belle's soft voice was as gentle as the hand she put on Ruby's shoulder. "It's okay. You had seven years to become 204. It's not going to take just a few days to naturally feel like Ruby again."

Leaning into the touch, Ruby pressed her cheek against the back of Belle's hand. "Scared."

"Of what?"

"H-hurting… every...one."

At least at the facility, there were all the measures to keep the wolf under control, keep the subject from dealing damage to her caretakers. Here, in this wooden place with no chains and no prods, she was free to attack and rage and howl and be the monster that the wolf wanted to be.

She didn't want to go to sleep only to wake up to blood covering the walls and floors. She couldn't deal with that all over again.

"That's not going to happen, Ruby." The mattress shifted with Belle's weight as she moved to sit up next to Ruby and wrap an arm around her shoulders. Ruby adjusted herself into lying on her side with her head on Belle's lap. "You were in good control all day, even when hearing talk about the facility got to you."

Ruby rubbed a palm over her arm, only to be reminded of how rough and damaged her hands were. She brought her palms in front of her face and saw how rough and twisted the skin was where claws broke through so often that her body couldn't repair itself properly anymore.

"You're on the right track." Belle ran her hands through Ruby's short hair, and it felt good. It almost tickled but it also felt soothing. "Soon enough, you'll be able to talk more easily on your own. You'll be able to eat on your own. You'll be able to…"

There was a pause, and Belle even stopped stroking Ruby's hair.

Then, seeming to regain herself, Belle continued. "You'll be able to live on your own."

"Want…" Ruby rubbed her thumbs over her palms. "...to… l-live… with you."

Belle stiffened for a moment, and didn't answer right away. Panic started to fire through Ruby as she thought that maybe she had said the wrong thing.

But Belle started to relax and began to stroke Ruby's hair once more. "Yeah. Being roommates might be fun."

Though there was still some leftover panic, Ruby was able to get herself to smile. "Y-yeah."

* * *

Belle wasn't sure why she had mixed feelings about the idea of being roommates with Ruby even after all was said and done. There was a sense of excitement and adventure to the thought, and Belle liked the idea of remaining in close proximity to Ruby. Being apart was a concept that was still difficult to imagine right now, given how much time and energy they'd spent together.

But would it be for the best? Would having Belle around all the time help Ruby or only encourage dependence? There was a line between being supportive and becoming a crutch. At this point, Belle was still trying to figure out where that line was.

If there was anything Belle was sure about, it would be that Ruby deserved to be  _Ruby's_ Ruby. She deserved to be able to stand on her own and live a human life once more.

How they were going to get there would take a great deal of fumbling around in the dark, but Belle resolved to keep encouraging Ruby to learn to do things on her own. The support and comfort would always be there, of course, but it would also help to have Ruby try to go off and do something on her own once in a while. Maybe the triplets could take her on a tour of the forest or Mrs. Dunbroch could cook with her or something.

Speaking of which, Belle wanted to help prepare dinner.

Ruby had dozed off with her head on Belle's lap. It took some effort and gentle manoeuvring to ease herself out from under Ruby, who mumbled something and rolled onto her other side. She curled up into a fetal position but kept her eyes closed.

Holding herself back from breathing a sigh of relief, Belle slid off the bed and slipped out the door.

Downstairs in the kitchen, Mrs. Dunbroch could be heard moving around, accompanied by the sound of sizzling meat. The smell of oil and meat was strong enough for even Belle's human nose to detect. She made her way over to find the Dunbroch parents at work in the kitchen, while Regina and Mulan were sitting in the lobby. As Belle passed them, she saw Regina holding Mulan's damaged hand with brows slightly furrowed in concentration.

"Hi," Belle announced her presence in the kitchen. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Mrs. Dunbroch continued stirring in a pan without looking up. "Could you be a dear and set the table for fourteen? Place forks for the meal and dessert spoons for after." She gestured towards the left side of the kitchen, by the fridge. "The dishes and utensils are in that cupboard over there. Fergus is almost done with mashin' the potatoes. He'll set up the folding table for you after."

Belle set to work with her assigned task, going back and forth from the kitchen to the dining area with plates and utensils.

It felt strange, engaging in such a mundane, domestic task after all the larger-than-life things she'd been doing in the past week. For the first time, all Belle had to do was figure out how to fit fourteen plates on a table instead of how to keep Ruby and herself alive.

"What are you cooking?" Belle asked, coming back into the kitchen for glasses.

"Shepherd's pie. Just a big mash of potatoes, meat'n'veggies." Mrs. Dunbroch's reply was bright and excited. She took the mashed potatoes from Mr. Dunbroch and began to spread it over the thick mixture of meat, vegetables and sauce. "They've been starvin' us all half to death, in that horrid place. This'll be one step towards putting some meat back on our bones."

Putting several glasses on a tray, Belle stopped and took a moment to take in Mrs. Dunbroch's appearance. Though she didn't have the shaved head that Ruby, Merida and the triplets shared, she did carry the same gaunt cheeks and sunken eyes. There was color to her face though, and a light that shone in her eyes.

Reminding herself not to stare, Belle continued on her way to the dining area to set the glasses down. Mr. Dunbroch was unfolding a spare table. Even though his massive frame exuded power and strength, the bags under his blue eyes and the grey in his beard gave away how much the years had taken a toll on him. Belle couldn't imagine how he must have dealt with the painfully short visits he was allowed to have with his family. The helplessness must have eaten away at him, having to see the gradual deterioration of his wife and children under Gold's guise of  _curing_ his  _patients_.

Mr. Dunbroch straightened up and counted the places at the table with motions of his hands and whispers under his breath. "Going to be a big dinner tonight for a big group, aye?"

"I doubt we're going to have any leftovers." Belle set the last few plates before putting her hands on her hips and imagining how dinner was going to pan out with such a big group of people. "I imagine most of us will be licking our plates clean." Already, she was starting to feel a rumble in her stomach as the smell of Mrs. Dunbroch's cooking continued to waft over.

"S'why Elinor's making three big pies to fatten us all right up." Mr. Dunbroch let out a hearty laugh, "If it were up to me, I'd scoff a whole pie on my own, but the wife wants me to share."

Belle smiled at Mr. Dunbroch. "You can have one to yourself and I'll have another. We can keep that between us."

Another booming laugh thundered out of Mr. Dunbroch. He clapped Belle's shoulder with a heavy hand. "Deal!" Still chuckling to himself, he headed back to the kitchen.

* * *

A fog was clouding Ruby's head as she forced her heavy eyelids to open. The room gradually came to focus and it took some time to rifle through her memories and remember where she was and why the floor was so soft and why the room was so dark.

"Hi, Ruby," Belle stroked Ruby's head. "It's time for dinner."

It was tempting to grumble her reluctance and roll over into another position, but Ruby reminded herself she was used to scrambling to her feet as soon as the guards told her to.

But the bed was just so soft, it was hard to gather up the willpower to get up.

"Come on," Belle tickled the prickly hairs at the back of Ruby's head. "Let's get you out of bed. You can go back to sleep with a full stomach."

At the mention of food, Ruby was reminded of the dryness of her throat and the emptiness in her stomach.

Still regaining control of her limbs through the fog of grogginess, Ruby sat up and rubbed at her eyes. She stretched her arms up and arched her back, joints popping and clicking into place while she yawned.

Satisfied that Ruby was starting to get up, Belle moved towards the door. "Come on, sleepyhead. We might miss out on Mrs. Dunbroch's Shepherd's Pie if we take too long."

Stifling another yawn, Ruby got off the bed and followed Belle out of the room, down the stairs and to the dining area.

Tantalizing scents of meat and vegetables engulfed Ruby's senses. Her mouth watered as they got closer to the table, where Emma was already sitting at the edge of her seat, draping her arms around one out of the three big plates of pie.

Belle and Ruby took their seats between Emma and Mulan by one end of the table while Merida and her brothers were at the other end of the table. The Dunbroch siblings swiped snatches of food with their fingers along the edges of the pie, smiling smiling innocently when their mother glanced their way.

"Can we start yet?" Emma whined, inching her hand closer to the pie in front of her. With a roll of her eyes, Regina took Emma's hand away from the food. "But… I'm  _hungry_!"

"We wait for Killian and Neal." Mrs. Dunbroch turned to her children, "And if I see one more hand touching the pie, there will be no running in the woods tomorrow!"

"But  _muuum_ , we're not doing anything!" One of the boys whined.

"What do you call those marks all over the mashed potatoes?" Mrs. Dunbroch retorted. "And don't try to tell me it's your father that's been doing- Fergus, I can see what you're doing, put your hands back down on the table!"

Mr. Dunbroch flashed a sheepish smile and moved his hands away from the food.

Neal and Killian finally arrived, hair sticking out at odd ends, eyes bleary, strides unsteady as Aurora led them to the table. They took their seats, next to Regina and began to perk up at the sight of the food.

"Sorry we're late, mates." Killian picked up his utensils. "Neal forgot to set the alarm."

"Even if I did, you still would have put it on snooze," Neal grumbled. "You always do."

Now that they were all present, Mrs. Dunbroch gave everyone permission to dig in. The smell of the food was irresistible, but as Ruby looked down at her plate, she felt painfully aware of the utensils and how much she struggled to use them last time.

Rubbing her hands together and shifting in her seat, Ruby watched everyone else before making any move to serve herself.

Emma dumped a huge serving onto her plate before handing a smaller serving to Regina.

"You ready to pig out, Rubes?" Emma turned to Ruby, brandishing another serving. "Say when I've dumped enough on your plate."

Trickles of fear tightened Ruby's chest, but she managed a smile and a nod as Emma started to fill the plate.

"En…" Ruby lifted a hand and cleared her throat. "Enough. Th-thank… you."

"Bon appetit!" The smile Emma gave Ruby was warm and encouraging.

But Ruby still didn't feel ready to try again at fumbling with her utensils. She watched Emma stand up and serve the plates across her. Neal and Killian accepted Emma's help with smiles and thanks before they dug in. Regina was also already starting to eat. The triplets were stuffing big dollops of potato and meat into their mouths.

"You alright?" Belle asked, no doubt noticing Ruby's hesitation.

Ruby nodded and was about to return her attention to her plate when she noticed the tension on Mulan's face. There was the hint of a grimace in the set of her mouth and if Ruby were to trust her hearing, there was also a hitch in Mulan's breath every time she moved her hand.

"M…" Ruby hated how foreign it still felt for her mouth to form words. She took a breath and tried again. "M-Mulan?"

Mulan exhaled and turned her head to face Ruby. "Yes?"

Ruby touched her own hand.

Picking up on the exchange, Belle turned to Mulan. "Is your hand still hurting?"

Squirming under the attention now directed at her, Mulan rubbed her injured hand. "Regina was working on it again before dinner. It's less swollen now and I can move it better, but it's really sore." She shrugged, "Regina was moving bone, tendon and muscle around for a good hour, I'm not surprised the whole thing is sore from all that tinkering."

"Do you want something for the pain?" Belle asked.

Aurora noticed the exchange and put a hand on Mulan's shoulder. "There's a first aid kit in the kitchen, do you want me to get you a painkiller?"

Shaking her head, Mulan retrieved her utensils. "Nah, I'll be fine. It's just sore. I'll be fine." It was clear that Mulan was uncomfortable and didn't want a fuss to be made over her, so Ruby looked away, and again tried to focus on the food on her plate.

With unsteady hands, Ruby reached for her fork. She braced herself. The constricting feeling in her chest made her all the more aware of how fast her heart was beating. It was trying to escape this situation that required her to eat like a human being when she spent years eating like she was less than human.

"Just let me know if you need help," Belle whispered, just soft enough for Ruby's ears to pick up. "But give it a try on your own first."

Nodding, Ruby gritted her teeth and used the fork to scoop up the mash of meat, vegetables and potato. It took several tries to get a decent forkful since the food kept slipping off. By the time Ruby had managed to collect some meat on her fork, she was more frustrated than anxious.

But as she started to bring the fork to her mouth, her trembling hands couldn't keep the utensil steady. The food fell back onto her plate.

Ruby hadn't even eaten yet, but her fingers were already starting to stiffen up and ache from holding the fork so tightly. She tried to hold it with a more loose grip and made another attempt to eat. The utensil slipped from her fingers and clattered loudly on the plate.

Most of the table didn't even notice, but Ruby made eye contact with Merida and saw the same frustration in her eyes. The serving of food on her plate had barely been touched and she was massaging her fingers like they were as sore as Ruby's felt.

By now Ruby was tempted to eat with her hands like she did at the facility, but if Merida wasn't doing that, Ruby wouldn't either. She looked back down at her food and tried again. Listening to the chatter around the table helped dull the frustration.

"So what happened at the bar?" Aurora asked, addressing Emma. "I just know you got hammered and got a bouncer involved in your mess."

"First of all," Bits of potato and meat sprayed from Emma's mouth as she spoke. "I was  _tipsy_ , not ham-"

"You were drunk out of your mind!" Neal interrupted.

"Emma, for the love of god, chew with your mouth closed and swallow before talking!" Regina curled her lip, "I'd rather not have bits of your saliva and half-chewed food all over my arm."

"Sorry, babe." Emma awkwardly wiped Regina's arm before turning back to Aurora. "I was a little-"

" _A lot_."

Emma rolled her eyes. "A  _lot_ drunk, and we were having a good time. I was telling Regina how beautiful she-"

"You told me that if you had to choose between me and bearclaws, you'd choose hot chocolate with cinnamon."

Emma shook her head, "No, I said I'd choose hot chocolate with cinnamon and a side of you."

"So  _that's_ what you were saying." Neal laughed. "You were slurring so bad we could only pick up like every other word."

"Harris, close your gob! I swear I've got food in my mouth that's sprayed out from yours." One of the triplets was cringing and swatting his brother's shoulder.

Harris shoved his brother's hand away. "That just means you're chewing with your gob open too!"

" _Boys_." Mrs. Dunbroch's tone was a low warning. "Remember your table manners."

"What  _manners_?" Another one of the triplets reacted with flailing hands. "We didn't eat on a  _table_ for a  _bajillion years!_ "

Mrs. Dunbroch's disapproving expression melted, color draining out of her face and light fading from her eyes. She looked down at her plate. "Well… let's… let's just eat up." Her voice was soft at first.

With a subtle shake of her head, Mrs. Dunbroch's face hardened. She lifted her head and squared her shoulders. "We've got to gain back some weight and health after they'd been starvin' us for those…" She swallowed visibly, but kept her voice steady. "...those years."

Mr. Dunbroch put his hand over his wife's. She gave him a tight smile and squeezed his hand.

"It's behind us now." Mr. Dunbroch said, voice softer than ever before. "We'll heal."

Mrs. Dunbroch nodded. She looked over the triplets stuffing their faces and resuming their banter. Then her eyes fell upon Merida. She still hadn't eaten. Like Ruby, Merida was still fumbling with the fork, frustration pouring from her gaze in waves.

"Merida, what's the matter?"

"Nothing." Merida mumbled.

"You're not eating."

Merida put the fork done and leaned back against her chair. "Ruby's not eating either."

Mrs. Dunbroch looked across the table to make eye contact with Ruby.

It was unnerving. Ruby couldn't hold it and found herself looking away. She fidgeted with her hands, rubbing her palm over the back of her hand and massaging her stiff fingers. The eyes on her made her feel guilty about the food she couldn't eat.

Quiet was settling over the table as people started to notice the tension and look from Ruby to Merida to Mrs. Dunbroch and back.

"What's the matter?" Mrs. Dunbroch leaned towards Merida but she shrugged off the hand moving towards her shoulder. "Merida…"

"Just…" Merida shook her head. "I'll eat later." Her eyes were shiny, her jaw was clenched and her lips were pursed. "I'm not ready right now."

Mrs. Dunbroch's frown looked more concerned than angry, but Ruby still flinched as it was directed at her. "Ruby?"

"I…" They were all looking at her. She couldn't get the words out. They were stuck and couldn't get out and her throat felt tight. Her chest felt tight. Her head felt heavy. Her hands were shaking. "I…"

She hadn't used utensils in years. They didn't allow her any when she asked and stopped giving reasons no matter how many times she tried to get an explanation. And she just gave up and ate the mush they gave her straight out of the bowl.

"They…" Emma put a hand over Ruby's. "The facility didn't give them utensils. During feeding time."

Mrs. Dunbroch's eyes darkened. "They didn't?"

The table was heavy with tension. Ruby wanted to curl up and hide under the bed.

Emma was also starting to shrink. "I think… Gold wanted to see how far he could go with… with making them feel less human?"

The darkness in Mrs. Dunbroch's eyes grew heavier. She stood up and with a stiff back and rigid limbs, went to the kitchen.

Silence hung over the table, made heavier by the tension in the air. Everyone stopped eating and nobody spoke. Ruby wanted to leave. She wanted to hide in the room and hide from the mess she'd caused by drawing attention to this. She wanted to just get away from this heaviness.

From the kitchen, Ruby could hear running water. It went on for a moment, then stopped. Footsteps followed.

Mrs. Dunbroch returned with clearer eyes and less stiffness in her body as she returned to her seat.

"Alrighty." When she spoke again, they were all listening. "Obviously, it's going to take a bit of time for the two of you to get back into the habit of eating with utensils. Tonight," She looked at Merida then at Ruby, "Just tonight, you can eat with your hands. Or we can help feed you if you want. Tomorrow, we can get started on practicing with spoons and forks so you can eventually relearn it."

Ruby nodded.

"Would you be more comfortable if Killian and I washed our dishes and headed back to our rooms?" Neal offered, "I mean we won't judge you, of course. But would us being out of sight help?"

Not sure how to answer that, Ruby took a moment to think about how she was afraid of making a mess and  _being_ a mess in front of so many people, only half of whom she was really familiar with. She nodded.

Neal and Killian stood up and brought their dishes to the kitchen.

"Emma and I will do the same." Regina said, "We're just about done any-"

"But I'm-" Emma stopped at a look from Regina. "...going to grab some pudding from the fridge and eat it in the room."

"As long as you don't make a mess." Mrs. Dunbroch warned. "We're only borrowing this place, after all."

Emma saluted. "Yes, ma'am!" She and Regina took their dishes away.

"I'll get going too." Mulan added. Aurora did the same. The triplets exchanged looks and also followed suit.

"Do you want me to stay?" Belle asked.

Ruby nodded.

Soon, the table was left with just Ruby, Belle, Merida and the Dunbroch parents. Even with less eyes to judge the less than polite way of eating Mrs. Dunbroch's cooking, Ruby still didn't feel comfortable enough to start.

A glance at Merida showed that she wasn't, either.

"Would you like us to stay or leave, dear?" Mrs. Dunbroch asked.

Merida sniffled and looked away. Her answer came in a soft, unsteady voice. "Mum… Could you and Dad leave, please?"

"Very well." Mrs. Dunbroch kissed her daughter's forehead. "We'll just be in our room if you need anything. Come say goodnight to us when you're done."

Merida nodded.

Mr. Dunbroch also gave his daughter a kiss before following his wife and helping her clean up the last of the dishes.

Once they were gone, Merida bent over her plate and finally started eating, scooping hands full of the mash into her mouth.

Hunger winning out, Ruby did the same. She hated resorting to this and struggling with something as basic as utensils, but she was so hungry and the food was good. The meat was savory, the vegetables added texture and flavor, the mashed potatoes were squishy and filling.

Merida was the first to finish and didn't say a word as she stood up and brought her plate to the kitchen. After washing her dishes, Merida came back and made eye contact with Ruby.

For a moment, there was understanding in Merida's eyes. They were both abused and degraded at the facility. They carried similar scars. Tonight showed just how similar those scars were.

Seeming to be unnerved, Merida looked away.

Ruby wasn't sure if she should continue eating or say something or wait for Merida to say something.

Merida returned her gaze to Ruby. "'Night."

Not trusting her voice, Ruby nodded and tried to smile.

A lopsided smile pulled at the edge of Merida's lips before she turned and headed down the hall to her parents' room.

Returning her attention to her food, Ruby finished up the last of the potatoes and vegetables on her plate until she was bloated.

"How are you?" Belle asked.

Ruby stood and picked up her plate. She searched through the words in her head to describe the feelings in her chest. "Sad… I think."

"Do you wanna talk about why?" Belle brought her own dishes to the kitchen with Ruby. "I could wash that for tonight."

Uncomfortable with how useless she was, Ruby stepped back from the sink and fidgeted with the edge of her shirt. "Because I'm…" She frowned and looked down at her feet. "...like… this."

"Ruby, it's barely been a week." Belle finished up washing the dishes and put them on the rack. "Give yourself time to heal. And we're all more than happy to help you get the hang of all the little things and all the big things."

"Th-thanks." Ruby followed Belle back up to their room. Belle used the bathroom first to shower and freshen up before bed. Once it was Ruby's turn, she felt awkward and needed help being introduced to what the knobs did.

It was weird, having the privacy to clean herself. Just as weird was actually having hot water that soothed her instead of cold water blasted at her, making her gasp for breath and tremble.

She closed her eyes and just enjoyed the feeling of the warm water spraying her face and dripping down her skin. The heaviness eased as she continued to stand under the spray and allow it to wash away the tension from the long day.

Another thing that was also bizarre was not having chains dragging as she stepped out of the of the shower. That, and being able to dry herself off without anyone rushing her or watching her.

As she finished up, Ruby noticed that the mirror had fogged over. She reached over and wiped it until she was able to see herself again. The creature staring back at her looked skeletal, but there was more filling under her cheekbones now. There were still deep bags under her eyes, but they weren't as dark as before. Her lips also looked less cracked and dry, now more a more hydrated shade of pink.

What would never leave were the scars. There were the pale, thin lines she got from Dr. Gold's knife, the white webbing on her shoulders and sides from the prods, the deformed skin on her ribs from the bullets, the deep stripes all over her stomach and face from Merida's claws.

Would Merida ever really forgive Ruby?

Still not sure of the answer to that question, Ruby sighed, finished dressing up and left the bathroom, where Belle was already curled up under the covers. The droopy eyelids showed how tired she already was. "Feels so good to be on a real bed again."

Ruby hesitated.

Blinking the sleepiness away, Belle sat up. "Is something wrong?"

"Scared." Ruby fidgeted with the loose shirt provided by the fairies. "Don't want…" This was a conversation they'd already had before, but it was still a worry that ran through Ruby's mind. "...t-to… hurt you… again."

"It'll be okay." Belle shifted in the bed to get a better look at Ruby. "We're going to have to deal with a few bumps along the way, nightmares here and there." Nightmares were exactly what Ruby was fearing. She hoped she wouldn't accidentally scratch Belle in the middle of thrashing about. "But that's fine. You can't control how your body's going to react while you're asleep, but I'll be careful if your claws start coming out. Does that sound good to you?"

Ruby bit her lip.

"The bed's nice and soft." Belle stroked the mattress and pressed against the pillows. "Don't you want to finally get a good night's rest?"

The demonstration of how soft the pillows were was convincing enough. Ruby climbed into bed and settled down at the very edge. She was still worried about being too close to Belle and hurting her.

"Move closer or you're going to fall off!" Belle prodded Ruby's ribs. It tickled and made her squirm. A smile teased its way onto Ruby's lips, but she stayed in her spot. Another poke tickled her ribs. She squirmed away, only to find herself closer to the edge. "Are you going to move closer now?"

The playful mood was infectious. Ruby realized she was grinning now.

And not quite ready to give in just yet. She stuck her tongue out at Belle.

"Oh, I see how it is." Belle moved forward with a hand ready to tickle Ruby's ribs. She squirmed further backwards, resisting the urge to swat Belle's hands away for fear of misjudging the wolf's strength. That was always going to be a danger. Ruby knew she still had to maintain control, even in these moments of playfulness.

Still, she allowed herself to give in a little bit. Allowed herself to laugh. Allowed herself to squirm. Allowed herself to play and have fun and loosen up.

It was surprising that Belle was stronger than she looked, managing to wrap arms around Ruby's waist and pull her closer to the middle of the bed. That, or Ruby was just very light. And it was easy to herd her around with playful pokes to the ribs.

By the time they were both in the middle of the bed, with Belle draping her torso across Ruby's stomach, she put her hands up in defeat, fighting through giggles. "Y-you win! You win!"

Belle's face was flushed. She was breathing heavily and let herself go limp across Ruby. "Awesome. What do I win?"

"Uh…" Ruby wracked her brain for a witty retort, combing through the interactions she'd had with everyone in this house.

"It was a joke." Belle patted Ruby's stomach. "Don't worry about it."

The response finally came to Ruby, but even if it was too late, she decided to say it anyway. "R-roadtrip…" Ruby felt her cheeks starting to get sore from smirking. "Aurora… dri… driving."

Belle's jaw dropped. "Noooo." She shook her head, "No waaay." Waving her hands about, Belle turned so she was lying on her back, with her head still on Ruby's stomach. "That would be more of a death wish than a prize."

Still smirking, Ruby shrugged.

The exaggerated look of protest on Belle's face faded away, leaving a smile as she stared at Ruby.

Ruby tilted her head to one side. "What?"

"It's nice."

Raising an eyebrow, Ruby tilted her head to the other side.

"Just…" Belle shrugged, "Seeing you like this. Seeing you happy. It's nice."

Being happy  _did_ feel nice. Ruby smiled back, but a voice in the back of her mind tried to question why she thought it was okay to be happy. She was still a killer and that was a fact that wasn't going to go away. How could she deserve to be happy after that?

"You've been through so much." Belle sat up and moved to lie next to Ruby, facing her. "It's good to see you smiling and laughing. You deserve a break from all the pain."

Ruby pulled her half of the blanket over her shoulders. The coziness that came with being wrapped up and under the covers was strange, but it was the kind of strange that Ruby would like to get used to again.

Watching Belle also wrap herself up and rest her head on the pillows was nice. The smile on her face was uplifting. There was no more tension in her body and it was good to see her finally relaxing.

"You?" Ruby asked.

"Me?"

Ruby asked a single question, managing only one word and hoping it would make sense.. "Happy?"

Belle's brow furrowed. "To be honest… I miss my Papa."

"Papa?"

"Yeah." Belle tinkered with a loose thread on the pillowcase. "It's just the two of us since my mother passed away when I was young. I'm worried about him."

"D-don't…" Ruby swallowed and tried again. "Never knew… my… f-father." When she would try to ask Mother about it, she would scold Ruby for asking stupid questions or ignore the question altogether.

"You'd like mine." Belle said. "He's usually very sweet. I'd love for you to meet him some day. When… when all of this has settled down."

Ruby nodded. "Okay." The more time she spent lying down with her head sinking into the pillows, the harder it was o stay awake.

It seemed Belle was also fighting back sleep. A yawn stretched her mouth wide open. "We can talk more tomorrow. I'm starting to feel my brain fading away." She shifted to lie on her back. "Good night, Ruby."

"N-night… Belle."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I'm working on a Korrasami piece for a contest, so I'll probably take maybe a week off to work on that before focusing again on this. BUT AT LEAST Y'ALL GOT A RELATIVELY CHILL CHAPTER THIS TIME. I actually was supposed to have another flashback here but meh, let's put it in the next chapter instead. But yeah, tell me your feels because it helps me keep writing!


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My gahd I feel bad about how it took another month before this update. On a random note I think there are just three chapters left for this including the epilogue. But I may or may not be considering writing a Wayhaught piece in this AU. Also I might work on accompanying pieces for this with Leticia and Konako, exploring the trifecta's lives after the events of this fic. Lol idk yet we'll see. ENJOY THIS CHAPTER.

The silver-lined cuffs on the subject's wrists were attached to the cold surface beneath her. Her ankles were similarly restrained, while the collar also served to keep her head still. Several thick leather straps went over her shoulders, waist and thighs. They didn't burn the way the cuffs and collar did, but they were tight enough to chafe. Her fingers were already going numb as she waited for any of the assistants or scientists to come into her field of vision and tell her what was going to be done to her.

"Greetings, dearie." The familiar voice made her stomach churn. She swallowed and tried to whimper out apologies, but none of the words could get past her collar. "You made quite the scene back there. I could have lost some very valuable investors due to your behavior."

The machines around her were beating at a rapid, deafening pace as her heart hammered hard and fast. She swallowed through a dry throat and tried to breathe herself into a sense of calm, but the beeping only picked up speed. Silver and leather cut into her as she squirmed.

"204!" Dr. Gold's voice was stern, stopping her in her tracks. "Calm yourself or I'll have Gaston bring out the electric prods."

Though beeping still rang in her ears, the subject forced her body to relax against the metal surface.

"Very good." Dr. Gold adjusted a knob to lower the volume of the machines. "Now I want you to hold still and keep yourself under control for today's tests."

A shiver ran up the subject's spine as Dr. Gold drew a knife. She bit her lip and looked from the blade to Dr. Gold, hoping for an explanation for what was to come next.

"I  _did_  tell those people that your healing rates needed further testing." His spidery fingers pushed her sleeve up to her shoulder before the blade pressed against her skin.

* * *

I'm so tired.

I hear voices and they won't stop. Writing helps to quiet them sometimes, but even now, I still hear them, still feel them.

I can feel Belle hungering for her mother's embrace, but I am not what she deserves. She should have someone whole and normal. Not broken. Not drowning under the weight of all the voices and all the emotions. I feel the deep sadness of my husband as he worries.

But I can't handle it. Every touch pulls me into his mind, fills me with all the worry and compassion that plagues him.

He deserves better.

They  _all_  deserve better.

I'm tired of feeling this weight. The voices tell me of their hungers, their pains, their sorrows, their excitement. The voices won't leave me alone.

_I'm tired._

* * *

It was the last journal entry.

Belle knew what happened shortly after that. She refused to allow the image of it to come into her mind, but she couldn't stop the tremors that ran through her body and the tears that pooled in her eyes.

There were milder entries before this one. There was a really good one where she had helped a sad child feel better by pressing positive emotion into him. But the entries after that were full of guilt and exhaustion.

Almost every entry in the latest journal were about being tired.

But  _every_  journal Belle could find talked about voices. They talked about the voices that expressed their emotions, and how loud it was whenever she was in a crowded place. They would all tell her things she didn't need to hear about their lives and their emotions. It would blast through her and wind her whenever she accidentally came into contact with people. It got bad enough for her to wrap herself up and expose as little skin as possible.

Being with Papa helped ground her since he was such a calm man. And when they were together, she was happy.

But that happiness faded not long after they got married and had Belle.

The responsibility of raising a child was a weight that Mama couldn't bear.

Wiping at her eyes, Belle tried not to blame herself for her mother's death, but the thought was a festering sore at the back of her mind. It drove her to study psychics and supernaturals with some electives in psychology. She had hoped to find answers and gain a better understanding of what Mama had been going through.

But maybe choosing to study her journals as a part of thesis research was not one of Belle's best ideas. She thought that it would be easy enough to view through logical eyes after years of allowing the pain to dull and letting the guilt fade into the background.

Instead, Belle was struggling to keep herself in one piece as she read the entries that showed a deteriorating woman who desperately needed help but pulled away from any help.

If she was here now, still alive, Belle would be dedicating her life to helping Mama be at ease with her abilities, helping her control the influx of empathic and telepathic connections.

Just… helping her be  _better_.

But it wasn't possible. It was too late now and Mama was gone.

The best that Belle could do now was dedicate herself to her research and offer her help to psychics and supernaturals who were struggling with their abilities. There were more than enough facilities across the country that would be ideal places for Belle to work and help people. The nearest one, Baelfire Research Center was one of the leading facilities with senior scientist Dr. Robert Gold at the helm. If Belle could just get into that one, then maybe things would all just fall into place.

For now, Belle just had to get herself through her thesis.

Hopefully, with time, she could successfully turn all of the guilt into resolve and passion.

A knock caught Belle's attention as Papa came in to stand at the doorway. "You alright, Belle?"

Sniffling and wiping at her eyes, Belle tried to regain her composure and forced a smile. "Yeah. Just… just feeling a lot more affected than I thought I would be."

"You've got guts, I'll give you that." Papa's smile didn't reach his eyes. "I couldn't get myself to read those and I couldn't throw them out either."

"Did you read any at all?"

Papa shrugged. "I tried to skim… but I just…" He shook his head, sighed and looked away. "I couldn't."

Standing up and going over to him, Belle wrapped her arms around her father. "She really struggled. And she didn't know how to get help." The feel of being in Papa's embrace was warm and soothing. Belle hugged him tighter. "I just hope that with more research, I'd be able to help others like her."

"I think you'll do great." Papa kissed the top of Belle's head. "You've got the heart for it."

* * *

The pounding, constricting feeling in her head was the first thing she became aware of as she awoke to find herself still strapped down. She couldn't move at all and the room around her was dark, but she could sense the hum of the monitors and machines.

"What was the one thing I told you to do last night?" Dr. Gold's voice was low and heavy with anger bubbling close to the surface.

Biting back a whimper, the subject looked up to see him standing over her bed. She tried to look to her side and saw that Belle was still asleep, oblivious to the fact that Dr. Gold had found them and he was very angry.

"Instead of staying still during our little tests like I told you to, you turned." The curl to his lip flashed his gold teeth. "This is why you're being kept here. You're a  _monster_  with absolutely no control over yourself."

Though the beep of the machines were still dulled from the lowered volume setting, they still echoed in the subject's ears, in time with the panicked beat of her heart. She shut her eyes and wished she could be anywhere else away from Dr. Gold's anger.

But he was right.

This was what she deserved.

She was a monster.

"Open your eyes." Dr. Gold's order sent a chill up the subject's spine. She was torn between the fear of facing his anger and the fear of worsening his rising temper. " _204_. Open your eyes,  _now_."

A jolt of electricity burned into her shoulder and charged its way up and down her arm. She jerked against the restraints, struggling and crying out as the pain built up to agony crumpling up her muscles and scorching her very bones. She tried to struggle and get away, but her body wasn't cooperating and the cuffs and straps only served to further dig into her skin.

Then it stopped, leaving her limp and breathing heavily.

Terrified of experiencing another shock from the prod, the subject snapped her eyes open to see Dr. Gold brandishing his knife. "Let's try this one more time, and I expect you to stay in control. Or we'll bring the prod into the session again."

Her eyes darted around the room, which was somewhere between one of the facility testing rooms and some sort of cabin bedroom. Belle was still asleep. Belle wasn't going to help.

And the subject didn't deserve the help.

She was a monster and this was what was supposed to happen to monsters. They were supposed to be experimented on by scientists who knew what they were doing.

The blade gleamed in the light before it dug into her exposed skin.

* * *

Belle awoke to whimpers. Blinking the grogginess away, she saw Ruby lying still, eyes wide open.

"Ruby." Recognizing signs of sleep paralysis, Belle put a hand over Ruby's shoulder and gave it a light shake. "Ruby, it's okay. You were dreaming, it's okay."

Sucking in a deep breath, Ruby snapped out of it and was able to move again. She pulled away and curled into herself, choking on whimpers and sobs.

"I'm sorry…" Belle wanted nothing more than to pull Ruby in for an embrace and soothe her until the tears dried. But if she wanted space right now, then Belle had to respect that. "Do you want to be alone for a while?"

Ruby shook her head.

"Do you want to talk about your nightmare?"

Still facing away from Belle, Ruby sat at the edge of the bed and rubbed at her head. The strands were still brutally short, but they were starting to thicken and grow out, with less of her scalp visible now.

"Don't know." Her voice was hoarse and barely audible.

"May I come closer?"

Ruby nodded.

Crawling across the bed, Belle took her position next to Ruby, sitting at the edge. They were close, but not close enough for their knees to touch. "I had some… difficult dreams as well."

Though she didn't say anything, Ruby turned her head to look at Belle in a wordless gesture to continue.

"I was looking through my mother's journals." Belle felt her voice shake. She rubbed her palms against her knees and swallowed before trying again. "She was a psychic too. Similar to Emma, I guess, but not quite. Her power was…" Clasping her hands together, Belle took a moment to search for the right words. "…less refined."

"What…" Ruby struggled to get the words out through her rough voice. "…happened?"

Feeling the tears burning at her eyes again, Belle grit her teeth and swallowed. On most days, it was easy to forget. In the past few weeks, it had been very easy to focus on the present and go about things day by day, task by task.

But now that things had slowed and there was time to think forward or backward, Belle felt the rawness come back to tear at her chest.

"To… I guess to make a long story short," Belle's words were unsteady, but she got herself to keep talking as she pressed her fingers into the corners of her eyes. "…her abilities were too much for her and she couldn't face herself anymore. She's gone now, but I still think about her sometimes. About how maybe if she just had better guidance, maybe if she had access to techniques and technologies that would have helped her ease more smoothly into the duality of the psychic and non-psychic worlds she walked between…"

As she spoke, Belle realized she was slipping into more technical thoughts to cope with the emotional turmoil.

She took a moment to regather herself and wipe at her eyes.

"Basically… I guess what I'm trying to say is… I wish  _I_  or  _someone_ … could have helped her. Maybe it would have made a difference and she wouldn't have felt like giving up was the only option she had left."

Still unsteady and shaky, Ruby put a hand over Belle's. "You… you… helped me…" Scrunching up her face like the words didn't quite sound right, Ruby tried again. "You help me… thank you."

"You're making a lot of progress, you know." Belle turned her hand so she could interlace her fingers with Ruby's. "I'm just… I guess I'm just saying that I may have been useless with helping my Mama, but at least with you, I can actually do something."

As the words came out, Belle backtracked. "Not that I'm using you as some sort of penance for what happened to my mother. I'm just… I'm just saying that some people struggle with their abilities too, but at least you keep trying to control it no matter what."

Then, she realized how that sounded like a jab at her deceased mother. "I mean… I just…" Belle rubbed at her forehead with her free hand. "I don't know. I just know that you're improving. You're doing great. And I want to help you as much as I can."

Wishing she could kick herself in the face, Belle added, "But of course I hope we can work our way towards the day that you can care for yourself."

By now, Belle decided she should probably leave things at that and wait for Ruby to give input. Anymore talking might just lead to more fumbling.

With a furrowed brow, Ruby looked down at the floor, seeming to struggle to process the load of information that Belle had just vomited out. "I… I want… that too. Want to… take care of… myself."

"And I think we'll get there with time and practice."

"Sorry… taking so long."

Belle shook her head and squeezed Ruby's hand. "This is going to take time and a whole lot of it. We don't have to rush. We'll get there at our own slow and steady pace, okay?"

A nod was Ruby's only answer.

"Are you feeling okay enough to go back to sleep?"

"Not sure…" Ruby turned to Belle. "Just wish… no more nightmares."

The nightmares weren't going to be easy to banish. Trauma such as what Gold had put Ruby through was going to take a very long time to push away. They just had to take things a day at a time. Belle rubbed her thumb over the back of Ruby's hand. "I'll just wake you up again if you seem like you're having another one. Fair enough?"

Ruby seemed doubtful, as she looked hesitantly at the bed.

"You want me to read something to you until you fall asleep? I saw a bookshelf in the hallway, maybe there's something there I could read for us."

A smile inched its way across Ruby's face as she warmed up to the idea and nodded.

* * *

Aurora's grannies were apparently collectors of Shakespeare plays and miscellaneous fairytales. Belle picked out a copy of Twelfth Night. It was a play Ruby couldn't even remember ever hearing of from her past life as a high school student. Not that she could remember much of her high school lessons anymore. The thought of relearning everything was daunting, but as Belle began to read in a clear voice, changing pitch and speed for various characters, Ruby was able to settle into a dreamless sleep.

By the time the sun started to cast its light through the gaps in the curtains, Ruby was surprised to find herself feeling well-rested. After spending so many years curling up to sleep under a steel bed, it was bizarre not to wake up to sore joints. It took some blinking and pressing a hand against the soft mattress under her for Ruby to reassure herself that this was her really new reality.

"You're up." There was a groggy huskiness to Belle's voice as she rolled onto her back and stretched, joints popping. "Did you sleep better?"

Ruby nodded, then after trying to form the words with her lips, she managed to get her voice to come out and say, "Good… morning."

Stifling a yawn, Belle sat up. "Good morning to you too, Ruby." She ran her fingers through her hair, which was now thick and puffy. "Let's get ready for breakfast?"

At the mention of breakfast, Ruby's stomach grumbled its reply. She flashed a sheepish smile and accompanied it with a nod. With her heightened senses, she could already hear the clatter of utensils and the vague sound of chatter between the Dunbroch parents. The smell of whatever meat they were cooking was absolutely mouthwatering. Ruby thought she could also pick up something that reminded her of the burger from Belle. Something that wasn't meat but…

Cheese.

Ruby remembered the cheese and sauce she'd gotten all over herself from that burger lunch with Belle at the facility.

The memories of the facility made Ruby cringe, but she grounded herself by focusing on the scent of the food as she freshened up in the bathroom and followed Belle downstairs.

The scents got even more intoxicating as they got closer, blasting Ruby with the aromas of bacon, cheese and bread. She wandered over to the kitchen to watch Mrs. Dunbroch make breakfast. They were almost done preparing a row of sandwhiches and it took all of Ruby's self-control not to devour everything on the tray as Mrs. Dunbroch handed it over.

"You and Belle can help Mulan and Regina get the table all set while I go and wake the others." Mrs. Dunbroch reached over and gave Ruby's shoulder a light squeeze. "I figured grilled bacon and cheese sandwhiches would be easier for you and Merida to eat for this morning. Then maybe later today we can get you two started on practicing to get your dexterity back."

Apologies over how defective she was flooded through Ruby's mind, but she couldn't figure out how to put them into words, so she settled with nodding in response to Mrs. Dunbroch.

She gave Ruby a sympathetic smile before heading down the hall to wake her children.

Mulan kept massaging her injured hand and keeping it close to her, only using her good hand to assist with setting the table. She avoided eye contact for the most part, and only spoke when they were done, "I'm going to wake Aurora." She walked off without waiting for anyone to respond.

"We had another session this morning." Regina explained once Mulan was back in her room. "I believe we've made some progress, but it always takes a toll on both of us and it's very painful on her since I'm essentially pulling her tendons around."

"Is she still having trouble moving it?" Belle asked, reclaiming her seat from last night. Ruby took the spot next to her once more.

Regina nodded. "She is. But I hope to help her heal into full recovery." She sighed, and Ruby wished she had the words to offer comfort to Regina, since she looked weighed down by the complications of healing Mulan.

Recollecting herself, Regina straightened up. "I'm going to go and wake Emma." She gave them a stiff smile before heading off.

Heavy, hurried footsteps reached Ruby's ears just as Neal came bounding into view, heading straight for the television and turning it on. At first it only showed static, until he put a hand over it and narrowed his eyes. The static cleared into a news report showing footage of Baelfire Research Center. There were crowds of protestors and reporters surrounding the building.

"Guys, check this out!" Neal leaped onto the couch and gestured for them to come and watch. "The footage I've been releasing has finally started up a real investigation. They've shut down any and all future tests at the facility. The only thing still working now, as far as I can tell, are some maintenance for some of the subjects they've managed to recapture, but from the reports I've seen, those subjects are being relocated and the place is going to completely shut down operations."

"Permanently?" Belle asked, leaving the dining table to sit with Neal. Ruby followed, feeling both frightened and in awe of the footage of the facility. It looked different from the outside, grand and almost welcoming with its tall windows and surrounding greenery. Any outsider viewing it would have no idea of the horrors within.

Neal shook his head. "Apparently, they can't shut it down permanently. Not just yet anyway. It's provided too much valuable research in the medical and military fields. But it's under so much fire right now that they have to at least suspend operations and figure out what to do."

Without even using the remote, Neal gestured upwards with his hand to raise the volume just as Tamara's face came on screen. The sight of her brought Ruby back to being strapped on the table as they cut into her to see how fast she could heal. She could almost feel the blade against her skin all over again.

Ruby focused on steadying her breathing as Tamara began to speak.

"What we do at Baelfire is essential to the development of our society. We can't have psychics and supernaturals waltzing around with enhanced abilities. It's dangerous for them to be out and about like that." Tamara was just short of yelling at the reporter. "The methods being employed are a bit harsh, but that's because people are viewing things from a  _human_  perspective. From a  _supernatural_  perspective, it's  _different_. They're not human. They feel things differently. A werewolf can heal from just about anything so this fuss about human rights just falls short since we're talking about creatures that are  _not human_."

As Tamara removed the microphone clipped to her shirt and began to walk away, the screen switched over to the reporter who explained Tamara's role as an intern. Then she went on to say they were able to get in touch with another intern. Another girl came on screen and it took a while for Ruby to recognize Jane when her name flashed onscreen.

"I'm… I'm not sure what to say." Jane was looking down and hunching over, fumbling with her hands and wearing an expression that broadcasted her discomfort. "I see the merit in the research, of course. But…" Jane looked up. "But I can't deny that the methods are very questionable. There was a subject there that I'd been researching. A young man raised by apes. I don't approve of how they treat him like an animal. I believe it clouds the research and I believe it downplays his inherent humanity. I think they underestimate his intelligence severely."

"What can you say about how they treat the supernaturals? Like the werewolf?"

Jane looked down again. "I didn't have a lot of time to research her but… But when I saw her, she was very weak. They tried to downplay it but I think she almost died during a test we were conducting with her." Taking a deep breath, Jane straightened up and found the resolve to look at the camera. "I believe that human or not, no living being should be treated the way they were treating her."

The reporter came back onscreen to say that Dr. Robert Gold, the Director of Operations and Head Scientist could not be reached for comment but is under investigation. They did, however, get in contact with two scientists who worked closely with Gold.

Dr. Whale came onscreen, with a less formal interview setup. He was wearing a hat and trying to walk away in what looked like a crowded street. Eventually, he turned and started to speak.

"The subjects that everyone's so worked up about, crying human rights and all that shit." Dr. Whale was growing red in the face. "They're all idiots because our subjects are not humans so they don't need human rights. We don't need to give the subjects special treatments when they're not special snowflakes. Now get that fucking camera out of my face." His hand came towards the screen just before it switched back to the reporter.

She went on to say that the other scientist they were able to interview preferred to remain anonymous. The screen went black before text was presented to accompany a distorted voice.

" _I'm really not at liberty to speak to anyone about anything or answer questions, but I can't in good conscience miss out on an opportunity to set the record straight._

_Baelfire Research Center aims to lead breakthroughs in science and medicine. We envision a world where the terminally ill can gain a second chance through cures developed with the help of anatomical properties from supernatural beings with enhanced healing. We also offer our research to the military since a wide range of the enhancements and abilities of psychics and supernaturals are invaluable._

_But that doesn't excuse the way we've been treating our subjects. I've played a part in the manipulation and torture of these subjects. These_ people _._

_And I realize that I can't keep running away from my guilt._

_What we're doing is wrong and Baelfire_ needs _to be shut down._ "

The report wrapped up with a promise to give updates on the investigation once more information becomes available. Neal shut the television off with a dismissive wave of his hand.

Sensing people behind her, Ruby turned her head to find that everyone in the house had gathered behind them.

And now it was quiet and tense.

* * *

Seeing shots of the facility again, seeing the faces of people from the facility again, hearing the rationalizations of Tamara and Whale- all of it felt like heavy blows beating Belle back into the reality of the facility. It was still there and Gold was still there. Whatever fantasies of safety and security Belle might have started to settle into were crushed by the reality of the facility still continuing to exist.

It was under investigation now with its operations suspended, but it was  _still_  there.

"Did you catch any reports on what's going to happen to us?" Aurora asked, clutching Mulan's good hand. "If they've made progress finding us?"

"I've been keeping track of that." Neal stood up to face everyone gathered behind the couch. "There are only a few rumors of us being sighted and their leads are flimsy at best. As for whether or not we're going to be carted off to prison or facilities, well…" He shrugged. "That's still up in the air. A lot of people still want to see us all behind bars, but there are several viral posts written by lawyers offering counterarguments for the calls for arrest. Some are even publicly expressing their willingness to represent us if we went out of hiding."

With their thighs touching as they sat next to each other, Belle was aware of Ruby trembling, fists clenched. Belle put her hands over the pale knuckles, slowly easing Ruby's hands open. Her claws were out, but they hadn't dug too deeply into her palms, the new cuts already stitching themselves closed.

"Is that something we're thinking of doing?" Belle asked, looking over her shoulder to process the range of expressions on everyone's faces.

Mrs. Dunbroch had her hands on the shoulders of her sons, her brow furrowed and her mouth a thin line. Mr. Dunbroch had an arm around Merida, the former with a clenched jaw, the latter with downcast eyes. Mulan and Aurora were exchanging looks, their eyes wide with worry. Emma had her arms folded across her chest as she chewed on her bottom lip. Regina's face was still and stony. Killian was rubbing at his chin, thoughtful. Neal was rubbing at the back of his head and looking upwards for answers.

"As much as I believe we should go through the systems in place," Mrs. Dunbroch shook her head, "I don't want to bring my family into a situation where they might become captives again."

"Elinor's right." Mr. Dunbroch put a hand on the small of his wife's back. "If we had to attend anything, I'd rather not involve Merida and the lads."

Emma looked up. "I say we stay low and they can just go and fuck themselves." She brought her hands down to her sides and shook her head. "I'd rather not set foot in a courtroom again."

"We might actually have a chance of getting out of this without having to completely change our identities and disappear." Aurora said, "I think it's worth a shot to come out and face the authorities."

"Baelfire is suspended and the scientists are under investigation. Maybe we can come out of this with  _them_  behind bars while  _we_  walk free." Mulan let the thought hang in the air before she added, "But I think we have to get involved and give our testimonies. Otherwise they might just find a way to pay their way out of trouble."

"But they're going to be able to pay their way out of trouble whether or not we show up." Emma fired back. "What difference would it make if we were there? We still have charges against us. I'm technically not done serving the vague and indefinite sentence they dumped on me. Killian and Neal are still yknow,  _actual_  criminals who do illegal shit. A lot of the things we did to get here aren't exactly  _legal_ either."

"That just means we'll only dig our graves deeper by continuing to hide." Belle spoke up. "And it'll only give Gold more time to worm his way out of trouble."

There was a point to what Emma was saying. And the Dunbroch parents had every reason to avoid authority after what trusting the system did to their family. Ruby was also in no position to testify against Baelfire when she could barely communicate.

But Belle could also see the point Aurora and Mulan were trying to make. That and they still had families and lives they couldn't in good conscience just leave behind. Belle would still rather see her father again and have a chance to properly sit down and talk to him about everything that happened and why she made the choices that she did.

"Wait." Neal held his hands up. "I think we should wait things out first. Public opinion on us is starting to improve, but I think I can still get it to tip even more in our favor, I'm still working on more hacks and uploads."

"Neal's got a point. It's not a good time for us to come out just yet." Killian added. "When we know more about the investigation and what it's leaning towards, that's when we should think about getting involved."

That brought on a few nods and mumbled agreements.

"We should gather more evidence though." Regina said, her expression now hardening into resolve. "I've been in and out of there for at least a decade. I can remember things. Names of other scientists. Things Whale, Hopper or Gold might have accidentally revealed to me. The way Gold treated his staff. I can recall even more and we can dig up more of the older files. I know they experimented on my mother as well."

"Awesome!" Neal did a little bounce. "We can work on that together then."

Mrs. Dunbroch cleared her throat and everyone turned to look at her. "Perhaps we can have breakfast now? The food is getting cold. We can talk about this again another time. Is that alright?"

At the mention of food, Ruby perked up considerably. Belle, too, agreed that breakfast sounded good for now and an updated plan of action could wait.

"Mum, after breakfast, can we play in the woods?" One of the triplets asked.

"Merida and Ruby can come with us!"

Upon being mentioned, Ruby and Merida exchanged uncomfortable glances. Then Ruby looked to Belle, eyes wide and nervous.

"That's a wonderful idea." Mrs. Dunbroch took her place at the table. "Would give you all a chance to run or climb that tension away." She looked from Ruby to Merida and back. "Will you go with the boys? They've started to get familiar with the trails and I'm sure they'd love to show you their new favorite spots."

Ruby was tense as she sat down next to Belle, her mouth opening and closing as she tried to form words.

"I think it would be a good idea." Belle spoke softly, making sure not to put pressure on Ruby or sound forceful. "It might help you feel better. But we can't force you if you'd rather not."

Fidgeting with her hands but at least not clenching them, Ruby looked at Mrs. Dunbroch. "Okay." The smile that followed was nervous and stiff, but Belle was proud enough of the initiative and courage Ruby was taking to come out of her shell.

"Yeah. Sure." Merida avoided eye contact and took a big bite of her sandwich. Belle wasn't sure if it was because she was hungry or if she wanted an excuse not to say more on the matter.

Though Ruby was still stiff and nervous, she relaxed enough to start eating her sandwich.

"Thanks, Ruby." Belle whispered.

* * *

It was difficult to push away the initial apprehension of following Merida and the triplets out of the cabin. The boys were so at ease and comfortable in the woods as they nudged and prodded each other the whole walk along the path off to the side. In contrast, Ruby's limbs and back were stiff as she brought one foot in front of the other, head whipping left and right at every sound.

Just as she flinched at the flutter of wings close by, Ruby noticed that Merida was tense as well. She had her shoulders hunched and her hands close to her face. Her eyes were darting around, wide open.

When her eyes met Ruby's, they hardened. "What?" Her lip curled and her voice was a defensive growl.

Ruby looked away and tried to keep her eyes on the path, but tension still hung between them. Last night, it felt like some semblance of progress had been made when Merida didn't act so coldly after dinner.

Now, as they walked without daring to look at each other, Ruby felt like they were back to square one and she didn't understand what she might have done to erase the progress. But there was still a nagging thought at the back of her mind that either way, Ruby still didn't deserve to be forgiven by Merida. Or anyone else. This was just the way things were supposed to be.

"Could you guys move any slower?" One of the boys turned and jogged a circle around them. Ruby still couldn't quite tell them apart, and barely remembered them from the very few times they used to hang out at Merida's house, back when they had lives before the facility. "Last one to the river is a total loser!"

He swatted the back of Merida's head and ruffled Ruby's hair before she could react. Then he charged down the path where his brothers had already started running at full sprint.

"Got your scrawny little rump back here, Hamish!" Merida tore after them.

Not wanting to be left behind, Ruby broke into a jog after them. She didn't trust herself to go at full speed yet, afraid the adrenaline rush would excite her inner wolf.

But as the leaves crunched under her shoes and the earthy scents of soil and leaves clung to the wind hitting her face, Ruby found herself smiling. The apprehension faded to the back of her mind as trees and branches blurred into her peripheral vision the faster she moved.

The boys' laughter echoed through the woods, loud enough to still be heard over the rush of water. The ground was starting to slope and the river was just downhill. The fearful part of Ruby's mind warned her to slow down, but instinct was taking over. It brought her over roots and logs, under branches, around rock formations and between trunks.

She slowed down as she reached the base of the hill, the ground transitioning into mud and pebbles. The triplets had started to wrestle in the soil and mud, tackling each other and trying various locks and holds on each other. Seeing them so happy and carefree brought a smile to Ruby's lips. They were laughing and playing like boys their age should have been able to throughout their childhoods.

Ruby felt her smile fade as she remembered it was her own fault that these teenagers lost their chance to be happy like this for a huge chunk of their lives.

Would it be awkward if she tried apologizing to them?

She glanced at Merida, who had taken a seat on a large rock and was watching the playfights, occasionally flicking pebbles into the water.

Not sure what to do with herself, Ruby sat down along the riverbank and idly dragged her fingers up and down the water. Maybe it would be best for her to keep the negative thoughts to herself. They were playing and having fun now. There was no need to bring their moods down with awkward apologies.

* * *

It took some prodding, but they managed to convince Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch to go out for a stroll in the woods so that Regina and Belle could be left to their own devices in the kitchen. That was until they found out that supplies were running dangerously low and the options left were a few canned goods and several boxes of instant mac and cheese.

Killian went off to restock, promising to also bring back booze.

"Don't worry, Reggie," Emma swung her legs from her position seated on the counter. Her heels thudded against the drawers. "Maybe you can put together something real fancy when we've got more supplies. I'm calling first dibs on your apple pie."

"Assuming I do get the opportunity for that," Regina stirred the mac and cheese. "I do hope you don't plan to eat the whole pie before anyone can even look at it."

Emma shrugged. "No promises."

Belle kept an eye on the timer for the first batch still being baked. "That's assuming the triplets don't beat you to it."

"Regina, what was the name of that other guy you remember?" Neal called, not even looking up from his computer. "I was able to get a list of some employees and consultants they used to work with. I can go through them one by one but if there are any key ones you recommend checking out, I can start there."

Regina's brow furrowed, "I remember someone they consulted. He was very friendly when he would see me waiting in the lobby. His name… It started with an M, I believe. Meelo or Milo or…" Sighing, Regina rubbed at her forehead. "Milo That? Milo Catch?"

"Milo Thatch." Neal said. "Linguist and historian. He published some studies about tracing the history of psychic abilities. There are also some papers he has, mapping out the natural habitats of cryptids and supernaturals. There's even a working theory he has on the migration and evolution of supernaturals and psychics. Pretty cool stuff."

Barking out a laugh, Neal added, "And he's written some really good articles about rights for psychics and supernaturals. A few of them started picking up traffic again. I'll spread a few more and get his stuff viral."

Noting that there were still ten minutes left for the mac and cheese to bake, Belle left the timer to go and look over Neal's shoulder to see the articles he was skimming through. He had hooked his laptop up to the TV monitor, giving himself more screens to work with and more tabs to look at.

"I remember him from some of my classes. He wrote some of the textbooks we were required to read for school." Belle recalled how his research used to be very scientific and objective, until he started to get passionate about speaking out against the abuse of psychics and supernaturals. "I used to follow his research until he just stopped publishing. What happened to him?"

Neal shrugged, opening up more tabs and skimming through them. "I might have to do more digging to find that. He hasn't been heard from since he left Baelfire in 2014. Around that time, he started staging protests. Lemme see… He started doing consultancy work with Baelfire in 2003. That's about when they had a big boom in subjects. Come to think of it, I vaguely remember him. Skinny guy. Really chatty."

"Yes, he was!" Regina said, "I remember he would notice when I was in a mood and he'd take the time to try talking to me. I didn't see him very often, but I remember he had a lot of arguments with Gold after a while, before he ultimately stopped coming. He came across some files, I think. I remember… I remember something he said."

Belle watched Regina step away from the stove and start to pace. "Something about the bears. Something…" She huffed and folded her arms across her chest. "I can't remember it but I feel like it's something important."

"By bears you don't mean…" Neal glanced at the cabin door. "… _our_  bears, do you?"

"Maybe?" Regina's voice was tight, just at the edge of snapping. "I don't know."

"Hey, come over here." Emma gestured Regina closer and took her hands. "Close your eyes, I'll try helping you focus." They touched foreheads and were both quiet for a while.

It struck Belle that Regina and Emma were linking their minds and sharing their thoughts with each other. And this time it was without the urgency of desperately trying to survive the facility.

With an odd twinge, Belle found herself actually  _missing_  the linked minds and shared connections. Now, all she had to go on what people were thinking and feeling were their expressions and body language. Regina was the best at masking that while Aurora tended to be an open book.

Belle busied herself with resuming work in the kitchen. She put aside the first batch of mac and cheese before replacing its spot in the oven with the second batch.

"The triplets." Regina opened her eyes and turned to face them. "Milo had some research on the distribution and evolution of some prehistoric bears, which lined up with rumors of bear shapeshifters in Europe and North America." Regina paused. Her jaw was stiff and she leaned against Emma for support.

"Gold…" Clearing her throat, Regina got herself to continue, "Gold used that research to find a strain that he used to trigger the abilities of the triplets. Milo found out and was furious. He confronted Gold about it, accused him of having no integrity." Shaking her head, Regina finished. "After that, I didn't see Milo in Baelfire anymore."

Nodding, Neal typed away at his keyboard. "After that, he got really verbal about the cause. Then he just disappeared. I'll see if I can find him but it'll take some digging. Do you remember anyone else I should look into?"

Regina shook her head. "I'll need more time to remember."

"What about you, though?" Aurora asked, addressing Neal. "Do you remember anything from before?"

With the question fired back at him, Neal's expression darkened. "It's hard to remember anything before and after finding out what he did to my Mom."

"What did-"

"Not now." Neal shook his head. He glanced at Emma. "Only  _she_  knows since she can read minds and shit."

"Might help to get it off your chest, dude." Emma suggested, her tone warmer now, without its usual snark.

Neal kept his eyes on his screens. "Maybe another time."

* * *

With a rock that fit comfortably in her hand, Ruby scraped the alphabet into the soil, carving out lines and curves that made up letters she so rarely saw during her captivity. It was uncomfortable, having to practice something so basic, but it came back to her more easily than she thought it would. It was actually harder to maintain her hold on the rock than it was to recall the letters.

With the complete alphabet laid out in the soil, Ruby started to spell out her own name underneath. The R had a lot of strokes, but it was doable. Carving out the curve of the U was tricky, but she managed. The B was frustrating. Y was the easiest.

Then she paused.

Distantly, she could still hear her mother cold words.

_"You are no longer my family, no longer a Lucas and no longer a part of my life."_

If Ruby wasn't a Lucas, then what was she?  _Just Ruby_?

But as much as she would like to respect Mother wanting to cut ties, Ruby still wanted to call herself a Lucas, to honor Granny. After she suffered and died in the facility at Gold's hands, there was nothing left of her. Articles of her vaguely talked about a serial killer. Files in Baelfire called her 115. Any remnants of her were distorted- turning her into a villain and an animal.

All that was left of her was the Lucas name, and Ruby wanted to keep that. No matter what Mother said.

Something solid crashed into Ruby, sending her tumbling forward and into the river with a noisy splash.

She propped herself up on her hands and knees, gasping at the shock of now suddenly being drenched and surrounded by running water. Just as she was lifting a hand to wipe at her face, more water splashed her way, followed by boisterous laughter.

Shaking the water out of her eyes, Ruby blinked until one of the triplets came into focus, smirking at her.

"What-"

The boy charged forward, tapping her shoulder and running past her. "You're  _it_ , Ruby! Catch us if you can!"

At first, Ruby preferred to just brush them off and walk back to dry land. But as she saw the boys and even Merida starting to run in different directions, it triggered something in Ruby. With a huff and a grin, she tore after the nearest boy, tapping his head before running down the river.

She heard him splashing behind her and decided to pick up her pace. Before she knew it, she was scampering around in the water on all fours, laughing with unbridled joy. She could feel a light tug in the back of her mind, of the wolf trying to free itself. But this time, it felt more like playful excitement than dangerous rage.

It was a feeling she wasn't familiar with, but she allowed instinct to take over and just gave in to the urge to run and jump and play.

Even Merida was part of the game and they tapped each other a few times.

The boys would sometimes get overexcited and tackle instead of tapping, but it was all in good fun. Soon enough, it became more of a game of chase and pounce instead of a traditional game of tag.

When one of the boys caught Ruby and ran away, she scanned the area for her nearest target, finding Merida crouching on an elevated outcropping of rock and earth. She was swaying her hips and gesturing with her claws in a challenge to come closer.

That was enough of an invitation.

Ruby ran towards Merida, clambering up the raised portion of ground only for her to jump into the water and look back, cheekily sticking her tongue out.

Letting out a sound that was somewhere between a laugh and a playful growl, Ruby jumped after Merida. The chase went on up and down the river, both of them splashing on all fours in the water until Ruby leaped forward and finally caught her target along the riverbank.

They rolled in the mud before sliding to a stop, their feet touching the water. Laughter was bursting out of Ruby and she realized that Merida was giggling too. She had her hand over her stomach while the other was pressing against Ruby's shoulder.

Needing to catch her own breath, Ruby rolled off and sprawled on her back, gasping and coughing in between fits of giggling.

When they finally started to regain their composure, Merida sat up and turned to look at Ruby.

That was when she noticed Merida's eyes were yellow.

And it dawned on Ruby that her own eyes felt warm.

She moved towards the water, and through the murky, rippling reflection, just barely managed to make out the yellow of her own eyes.

"Ruby?" One of the boys said her name.

They could see her.

They could see her like this and she let herself get distracted. She allowed the wolf to come out and interact with children. What could be more dangerous than letting a monster such as herself lose control around the members of an innocent family she had already  _destroyed_?

"I'm…" Ruby shook her head and stood up on shaky legs. She staggered backwards. "I'm a… m-monster."

She turned and was about to run away but instead found herself face to face with Merida.

"P-Please…" Ruby tried to step around Merida, but she continued to block the way.

"If you're a monster," Merida closed her eyes and sighed, her shoulders dropping. When she opened her eyes, they were once again clear and blue. "Then I am, too."

Ruby shook her head, closing her own eyes and forcing them to cool down back into their human color. "No… you're… you're not." She opened her eyes. "Didn't… hurt… anyone."

The shove startled Ruby, but she didn't retaliate. "I  _did_  hurt people, remember? Those guards? The night we escaped? I  _nearly killed_   _them_!" Merida choked on her words and pressed her knuckles against her eyes. "They… they…" She brought her hands forward and gave Ruby another shove. "They probably had families too. What if I infected them? What if I did to them  _exactly_  what you did to me?"

Another shove sent Ruby stumbling back, but she did nothing more than steady herself. The wolf was agitated and wanted to fight back, but Ruby swallowed it down. Instead, she choked out the only words she could say. "I'm… I'm s-sorry."

With a sigh, Merida brushed her damp hair out of her face and looked away. She wrapped her hands around herself and spoke softly. "I'm not ready to forgive you… I…" She swallowed visibly. "I don't know how to."

She then turned to look at Ruby and took another step closer. Flinching, she braced herself for another shove, but instead what she felt was the gentle touch of a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry I shoved you." Merida said, "And I… The most I can do for now is say that I understand you."

Ruby furrowed her brow and tilted her head. "What… what…" The words took too long to form in her brain and get to her mouth.

"I understand the pain and the panic." Merida took her hand back and fidgeted with the hem of her drenched and muddy shirt. "I understand how hard it is to control… to control  _it._ "

At a loss for what to say, Ruby looked down at the soil between their muddy shoes. It was a shock to hear this from Merida. Even Ruby was sure that they were both too different to hold any similarities. She was the real monster here. Merida was just a victim.

But it was warming to hear Merida say she understood. Ruby couldn't come up with a name for the feeling, but she noticed how lifting it felt and how her shoulders felt lighter.

"So… yeah. I can't… I can't forgive you yet." Merida extended her hand. "But I can understand."

Even before the facility, Ruby didn't really get how handshakes worked, but she took the offered hand anyway and clasped it. Merida flashed a small smile that Ruby managed to reflect.

Maybe they were making progress after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE NEXT CHAPTER MIGHT HAVE A CAMPFIRE BONDING MOMENT LIKE IN POWER RANGERS. If I push through with that, is there anyone in particular you wanna hear talk about their backstory? I mean I have plans for most of them but I'm curious if there's anything in particular y'all want me diving more into.


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM ACTUALLY UPDATING NOT A MONTH LATER HURRAY. Before we start, I just wanna say that lol even if I said that everyone was going to share at the campfire, things got reaaally long and the characters got ahead of me, so I'm cutting this chapter in two. About half the group shared stuff in this chapter. The other half will talk in the next one.
> 
> Also, this chapter was sponsored by Leticia who I had a few writing sessions with since she was also working on something for a Swan Queen event. ON THAT NOTE, if you haven't yet read the prequel she wrote for this fic, starring Emma and Regina, [I SUGGEST YOU DO THAT COZ HER WRITING IS JUST SO SOLID ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10996224/chapters/24493239)
> 
> Oh and lol I started writing [a Pricefield piece ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12091227/chapters/27406248) set in this subjectverse AU, check it out if you're a pricefield shipper, I will love you 50x more than I already do. I also [ made a collection for all the subject au stuff ](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/Subject_AU) coz i'm obsessed with this AU lol

The chilly night air gave Ruby a sense of calm. There was the occasional hoot of an owl and the leathery flap of bat wings. She tried not to flinch when they hit her ears, but they startled her every time, seeming to echo through the trees. Still, it wasn't enough to dispel the serenity she felt as she hugged her knees and watched the glow and crackle of the campfire.

A cold, damp bottle was in one of her hands, growing warmer as she put off drinking it. The first few sips felt hot and sour and strange in her throat. It made her grimace every time. At this point, she wasn't sure if she was going to finish it, but she didn't want to offend Killian by giving his offered beer to someone else.

Before the facility, Ruby had her fair share of secret drinking sessions with Peter, Dorothy and Merida. It was gross, but they had fun and they said things and did things. Truth or Dare games were commonplace during those sessions. A smile tugged at Ruby's lips as she remembered the notorious game where Peter had to shave his hair. It grew back into his usual spiky style in about a month or so, but Dorothy wouldn't drop the egghead jokes for weeks.

There was another one where Dorothy had to color her hair orange to match Merida's ginger. Peter had proposed that dare as vengeance and it backfired since Dorothy and Merida gained power couple status that year.

Those were the wilder games.

A few were more tame, like getting Merida to speak in an American accent or getting Ruby to prank call the popular kids.

"What are you sitting there smiling about?" Merida walked over to the cooler next to Ruby and claimed her second bottle.

"Just…" Ruby cleared her throat when it came out gravelly. "Just before… When… we used to…" She pointed at the bottle in her hands. "Truth or… D-dare."

Merida managed a smile but it didn't reach her eyes. "My favorite was the one where Peter made Dorothy dye her hair. Everyone loved it. She got a bit of a talking to from her Aunt and Uncle, of course. But that was a fun time. I still don't know why the school liked it so much."

Ruby shrugged. "Looked… good on her."

The stiff smile faded as Merida sighed and sat down on the ground next to Ruby. "I miss her so much." She took a swig of her beer. "Even now… I can't help but think of what she might say or do if she were here with us."

Lost for what to say to that, Ruby occupied herself with taking a sip of her own drink, grimacing as she did.

"Not enjoying that much, are you?" Merida raised an eyebrow.

"I…"

"Want me to finish it for you?"

Ruby blinked, then glanced across the fire to Mrs. Dunbroch, who was watching her boys like a hawk, making sure underage drinking didn't take place tonight.

Following Ruby's gaze, Merida let out a short laugh. "It's fine. We're not minors anymore, right?"

Still hesitant, Ruby handed the drink to Merida, who accepted it and started to drink from it. Mrs. Dunbroch noticed and was now watching with a raised eyebrow. "You best slow down, dear. I won't have you being sick in front of the fire."

"Got it, Mum!"

"Oy! Ladies, gents and whatever." Killian stood up, and called their attention, his voice louder than it needed to me, "Why don't we share shit like we're in some sort of AA meeting."

"What's there to share when Emma already read almost everything about us?" Neal said, his arm around Emma's shoulders. He ruffled her hair until she squirmed out of his hold. "No offense, Ems!"

Killian huffed. "C'mon, mate. Just coz Emma knows all our shit, don't mean everyone else does too." He shifted his weight from one foot to the other and adjusted his pants. "Look, okay, I'll start, mates."

"Keep it PG,  _mate_ , or Mama Bear will ground us for traumatizing the cubs!" Emma shouted.

There was a ripple of laughter through the circle, though Ruby picked up Mrs. Dunbroch whispering to her husband that there was truth to Emma's words.

When there was quiet once more, Killian audibly cleared his throat and took a step closer to the fire. "Now if you all can stop raining on my parade, I'm going to start." He took a sip of his bottle, draining what little was left before straightening up. "Before all of you idiots, I didn't really belong anywhere. Had a shit dad, no mom. Didn't have a lot of friends in school. But swimming…"

Killian exhaled loudly then toyed with the empty bottle. "I guess we can say swimming saved me. Gave me focus, gave me something to do. I was doing great at it, too. I was winning shit and I could have had a scholarship in some college or some shit."

"There were a lot of articles about you as a rising swimmer." Belle spoke up from her spot on the other side of the cooler, where she was sitting with Mulan and Aurora. "We found them when we were trying to track you down.

Nodding, Killian continued. "But I fucked up and-"

"Killian, language!" Mrs. Dunbroch interrupted. "You've been swearing up a storm. Could you please tone it down a tad?"

Killian's eyes were so wide, Ruby could see the firelight reflected in them. For several seconds, he just stood there in stunned silence.

Emma snickered. "I warned you, didn't I-"

"Emma, that means you, too."

Clearing his throat, but unable to suppress a smirk fired at Emma, Killian spoke again. "I… Yeah, I messed up. I was dealing since pocket money is a foreign concept to a shit- I mean to a… bad... dad." Killian blinked a few times, glanced at Mrs. Dunbroch. She gave him an approving nod and gestured for him to continue.

"Right… okay. And… well… I got caught." He shrugged. "Did my time, met Neal. We got ourselves into more trouble and sshhhstuff." He managed to stop himself from letting out another swear. Mrs. Dunbroch noticed and gave him another nod.

"The point is, I made a lot of mistakes. And I never belonged anywhere. But with you idiots. Excuse me, Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch." Killian flashed a sheepish smile at Merida's parents. "You all… I feel like I'm actually somewhere. And Aurora's grannies contacted me recently. Said they have more legit work for me when all this is over."

"Wait, really?" Aurora asked.

Killian nodded, then another sheepish smile played at his face. "That is of course after I settle my own debts and serve whatever I'm going to serve if I turn myself in."

"Good on you, man." Neal lifted a hand for Killian to fistbump. "I'm not sure if I can still go the legit way after all this. Depends on how things pan out with the investigation, I guess."

"They might have work for you too." Killian said, then looked around at the crowd. "Just… yeah. That's all I wanted to say. I didn't belong nowhere, but here… Around our little campfire… I feel like I belong somewhere."

"Amen to that." Emma raised her beer.

Killian did a little bow, then gestured with his arms wide. "Now who's next? I shared my piece."

"Funny how things work themselves out." Mr. Dunbroch's voice rumbled over the crackle of the fire. Ruby looked at him and saw that he was also holding a beer as he sat with his arm around his wife's waist. "I dreamed and prayed for the day our family would be whole again and I thought it would never happen. Gave up hope for it, I did."

He lifted his bottle. "And it might never have happened if it weren't for you five. Killian, Neal, Belle, Aurora, Mulan." Mr. Dunbroch's voice wavered, and he sniffed loudly. "You planned it all out and tried again when it failed and that's more than I can say for myself."

"It was a crazy move." Neal admitted. "Crazier even than our usual stunts."

A low chuckle rippled through Mr. Dunbroch's beard before he spoke again. "Well I would have liked to have a reunited family under…  _different_ circumstances. But I'd take being hustled into a van and going on a wild ride across the countryside over that old lonely life again. I'd take that again _any day_."

"I'm not sure if I'd do this all over again the same way," Neal said, "But really, if it weren't for Aurora, Belle and Mulan tracking us down and guilt-tripping us, we wouldn't even  _be_ here.  _None_ of us would be here, so I'd say we should toast to them."

Ruby watched as those with beer started to lift their bottles, until Aurora interrupted. "I don't think I should take credit for this, though. We wouldn't have made so much progress with our plans if we didn't have Mulan on board. And neither of us would even be doing  _anything_ if it wasn't for Belle convincing us to take action." Aurora nudged Belle, who was smiling, her face flushed pink from the warm glow of alcohol. "I still remember how cranky and sleep-deprived you were when you called me in the dead of night and begged me to meet you before work."

"It's not like you were already sleeping that time, you insomniac." Belle nudged back, then her face grew serious and she straightened up. "In all seriousness though, I don't think I would have made any move to take action if it wasn't for Emma and Regina reaching out to me. Actually, a  _lot_ of what set all of this in motion was  _Emma_. It was her mind links and telepathic messages. She got us all moving and she got us all connected. And she was the one who found out about Ruby and wanted us to dig deeper."

Lifting her glass, Belle looked over at Emma and Regina. "I say we toast to Emma."

As most of the group lifted their beers, Ruby lifted her cup of water, mirroring the triplets who did the same. There was a scattering of " _To Emma_ "s that Ruby joined in saying, though with less confidence as she still struggled with her own voice.

Lifting her head and enjoying the attention, Emma raised her hands and bowed. "Thank you, thank you. I like that you can all give credit where credit is due. I-"

"Emma Swan, is humility a foreign concept to you, or-"

"Hey, calm down, Reggie, I was also going to say something sweet about you but now I'm not sure if I still will."

Regina rolled her eyes.

Smirking, Emma said, "Okay, I'll say it anyway. As much as I got everyone moving with my annoying mental messages, I probably would have lost all hope of getting out if Regina didn't keep me going. Regina made the long, endless days bearable." Emma's voice had grown quiet and serious. She leaned forward, staring at the fire. In the flickering light, her eyes looked shiny. "I don't think I'd even still be  _around_ if I didn't have her for company."

All the talk of the facility made Ruby uncomfortable, but she surprised even herself with how in control she felt. There was a bit of an elevated heartbeat, and her hands were shaky as she put the cup back down. But besides that, her breathing was normal and she didn't feel her eyes warming up or her fingers hardening.

She glanced at Merida, who was hugging her knees and grimacing, staring intently at the ground.

"You… okay?" Ruby asked.

Merida shook her head. "Just… don't wanna think about that place ever again."

"This is nice," Mr. Dunbroch was speaking again. They all turned their attention to him. "Being among friends and family. I… I missed this a lot." He scratched at his beard. "I hated holidays and weekends, you know. The ones when we had no arranged visit at Baelfire. I hated being alone. The empty house drove me mad."

"Dear…" Mrs. Dunbroch's eyes were pained as she put a hand on her husband's chest and leaned into his shoulder. "I'm so sorry."

Mr. Dunbroch put a hand over his wife's. "Not your fault, love. I just… I'm just saying it was rough. I found myself taking on more work, just so I could avoid being at the house or at a bar."

His beard twitched as he smiled, tears in his eyes. "There was one christmas where I bleached my beard to white so I could drop by different shelters as Santa Claus. I'd give out presents since I had spare money from the extra shifts. I told some stories and sang some songs. It really brought a smile to the faces of the kids staying there. 'Specially the teens kicked out of their homes. They would hug me and tell me how they wished I was their dad."

He let out a heavy sigh. "Meanwhile, I wished so badly that I could be with my own children."

"At least you're with us now, right, Dad?" One of the boys said.

Mr. Dunbroch smiled. "Right you are, Hubert."

"What was it like?" Merida interrupted, causing all eyes to turn to her. "For you three? Was Gold… nicer? He let you room together." She ran her hands through her own short hair. "I mean he gave us all our haircuts when we screwed up, but he… he seemed…" Shaking her head, looked down at the ground and fiddled with the near-empty bottle on her lap. "What was he like with you?"

The triplets exchanged glances.

"It… I think we didn't have it as bad as you and Ruby did." One of the boys spoke up. He looked around, seeming to notice that the attention was on him now. "Um… hi?"

"Just for the sake of you guys who still can't tell us apart," The middle boy pointedly looked at Emma, "Or needs to poke inside our minds to remember our names…" At being called out, Emma shrank behind Regina, smiling sheepishly. "That's Harris, I'm Hubert, this is Hamish."

Ruby put in effort to commit their names to memory this time, but it was still difficult to tell them apart. For now she tried to associate their names with their clothes. Telling them apart again tomorrow would be yet another struggle.

"Could you guys like just introduce yourselves every morning for the next few days?" Emma asked, "Otherwise I'm just going to poke your brains again to doublecheck what to call who. I can't even give out wacky nicknames yet and that sucks."

Hubert rolled his eyes but Harris nudged him and said, "Guess we could try that for a bit, ya."

"Back to the question," Hubert poked at the fire with a stick. "It sucked, yeah. No phones, no TV, no internet, no videogames… no Dad… and hanging out with Merida and Mum was…  _tense_."

"We didn't get a lot of time to hang out with them much." Harris explained. "And our conversations tended to be through our… room…  _cell_ walls."

"But we kind of just got used to it after a while," Hamish added, then cringed, "I do remember a few tests that were pretty bad." He glanced at Mrs. Dunbroch and hesitated.

Mrs. Dunbroch was tense and stiff as she nodded. "Go on."

The triplets huddled close to each other and Ruby thought she could pick up "endurance test" and "healing test" amidst their whispers. As she waited for them to get ready to share their experiences, she couldn't help but rub at her wrists where her cuffs used to be. The skin was discolored from where the silver had been in contact with her without respite.

Ruby noticed the tattered old bracelet from Peter. It was a reminder of the both of them. The boy she loved and the girl she was afraid to love. They were a tightly knit little group but they made room for Merida.

They just never got the chance to get a matching bracelet for her.

Glancing over at Merida, Ruby couldn't help but think about how Merida had been such a source of happiness for Dorothy. They were great for each other and it had been petty for Ruby to be jealous and cold. There had been tension sometimes, and now…

Now, Dorothy was gone.

And all Ruby had left to remember her by was an old bracelet that said "Wolfie". The stupid nickname had been such a source of happy feelings. It used to be funny and just a little embarrassing. Then it became a painful trigger, reminding her of what she was as she fought to keep the monster within her from coming out.

Now, it reminded Ruby of loss.

Would Merida want it since it was connected to Dorothy? Or would she just find such an offer insulting since it had Ruby's nickname on it?

Not that Ruby was sure she was willing to give it at all.

"Okay." Harris straightened up. "We weren't always being tested by Dr. Gold, and we had some scientists that were pretty nice to us. Dr. Lumiere and Dr. Cogsworth would sometimes sneak us some snacks. And they'd check on us after the tougher tests."

"I'm pretty sure they were dating." Hubert added. "They argued like an old married couple."

Harris nodded. "They kinda did, yeah."

Hugging himself and rubbing his own shoulders, Hamish said, "But Dr. Yzma was pretty intense. More cranky and creepy than Dr. Gold, I think."

"When Dr. Gold was still trying to figure out if we could magically heal fast like Merida and Ruby or at a more regular pace like Mum, we had to do some tests with different…" Harris exhaled and rubbed at the back of his head. "…different blades. And that… wasn't fun."

"He apologized after and gave us some snacks but…" Hamish sniffed. "It sucked. And with the strength tests and the other tests, Dr. Yzma was harsh about seeing how much stronger and faster we were than… than normal people."

"The healing tests didn't last too long… and it's not as bad as y'know… Merida and Ruby but… well…"

A low grumble came from Mrs. Dunbroch, and in the flicker of light, it was clear that her eyes had blackened into that of her bear's. "Those are still tests that no children should ever have to go through."

"I mean we're not, like… kids," Hubert protested, but another growl quieted him.

"You should not have been put through that." Mrs. Dunbroch was baring her teeth, several of them sharpening to points.

Seeming to notice that her bear was trying to surface, Mrs. Dunbroch closed her eyes. Her ragged breathing echoed through the woods at first, but they eventually quieted down until she was able to speak again. "It was never supposed to be a curse. I grew up raised on the belief that it was a blessing. An honor even."

"An… an honor?"

Such a concept was completely foreign to Ruby. The shapeshifting was a painful curse. Their animal forms were dangerous and monstrous. They were beasts with raw power and a predisposition towards violence and ferocity. How could something like that ever be considered an honor?

"Yes, Ruby." Mrs. Dunbroch said, "Back home, we had some small communities. It was a family trait that was passed down from generation to generation. Sometimes it skipped generations, sometimes it mutated to something a little different. But it was treasured enough that in our little society of shapeshifting folk, those who had it were considered blessed."

Ruby felt her jaw drop. She felt utterly blown away by this whole concept. Turning to Merida, Ruby tried to stutter out a request for confirmation but only managed to let out an awkward croaking sound.

With a raised eyebrow at the sound, but understanding in her eyes, Merida nodded. "Our grandda was even disappointed when it was looking like the boys and I didn't have it."

"There were some people, of course, who didn't take well to it and sometimes infiltrated our ranks and attacked us." Mrs. Dunbroch continued, "And while the methods of those people aren't right, they did have reason to be concerned. Where there are people who are careful about their use of their gift, there were also people who abused the powers given to them and-."

"I can name a few people who fit that description." Emma said.

Regina gave Emma a look that was somewhere between teasing and exasperated. "Oh, you mean like you and Neal with the criminal use of your powers during your con days?"

Putting her hands up, Emma looked over at Neal and Killian, "Hey, in my defense, I was like fourteen when I joined Bonnie and Clyde."

"Hey, hey." Killian was wobbling as he pointed his bottle at Emma, spilling some of the alcohol. "Don't act like I was some bad influence or some shit, you were already starting to run your own cons before-"

Mr. Dunbroch cleared his throat. "Let Elinor finish, please." Chastised, Emma, Regina and Killian quieted down.

"Thank you." Mrs. Dunbroch nodded towards Emma and her group before continuing. "Even though Gold's tests have proven that our kind is more in control of our gifts than Ruby's is, we are also still prone to issues when we find ourselves dealing with intense emotions."

From her spot next to Ruby, Merida nodded.

"There was an incident back in Scotland. The boys were being bullied in school. I won't go into detail about it since that's their story to tell, but… but when the school failed to do anything about it, I…" Mrs. Dunbroch's hands were shaking. "You could say I lost control. I didn't cause permanent damage on the school staff, but it was enough to cause concern."

"It took money and a whole lot of begging to convince them not to press charges." Mr. Dunbroch put a large hand on his wife's trembling shoulders. "We agreed to leave and start over here. We contacted Baelfire and they helped get us set up. The only condition was... Elinor had to stay as an in-patient."

"We signed all this paperwork for them to run tests and do just about whatever they wanted." Mrs. Dunbroch's voice had gotten softer, and most of the group started to lean forward to hear her better. "We thought he would help. We were so desperate and humiliated that it was easy enough to be convinced that they could cure us or help us or…  _something_."

A moment of silence followed as they digested Mrs. Dunbroch's words and as she wiped at her eyes, trying to calm herself. Her lip trembled when she spoke again. "It wasn't having this condition that hurt the most. It wasn't even being put in the facility full time. I thought that was a necessity. And the worst wasn't even when I found out that my children had inherited dormant forms of the abilities."

Mrs. Dunbroch's voice broke as she continued, "It was when I found out they were  _going to be kept in the facility_." She sniffled and took out a handkerchief to wipe at her eyes and nose. "That… that was my lowest moment. When I knew I truly failed as a mother."

"Mum, no." Merida's pained whisper was soft with tenderness and heavy with emotion. She stood up and crossed over to sit by her mother. "You did your best."

Shaking her head, Mrs. Dunbroch put her arms around her daughter and held her close. Tears were now freely trailing their way down Mrs. Dunbroch's cheeks. "It pains me so much to find out what they put you all through. To find out how much they tried to make Merida into something else. I'm… I'm so truly, terribly sorry."

"I don't blame you." Merida whimpered, hugging her mother tighter.

The sight of such a raw, emotional moment made Ruby squirm and she found herself looking away, not sure if this was a moment that should be private or not. Ruby looked over the cooler at Belle, who was carrying an expression that looked pained and sympathetic.

Seeming to notice Ruby's eyes on her, Belle turned her head and offered a stiff smile. Ruby tried to mirror it, but couldn't.

Belle put a hand over the cooler, a quiet offer of comfort. Without hesitating, Ruby took it, intertwining their fingers and taking comfort in the warmth of the contact between them.

The talk of the facility and the sight of the Dunbroch family in such distress was difficult. It brought along a tangled mixture of thoughts and emotions that Ruby couldn't even begin to sort through.

Somewhere in the mess, she couldn't help but think about her own mother.

The memories were vague now, but when Ruby tried to recall them, she had the vague sense of their being a sense of pride and carelessness to Mother that Granny didn't have. If memory served right, Granny was careful and controlled. Which was why it didn't make sense that Granny was taken away and blamed for the murders.

Topping off that turmoil of confusion, Ruby also couldn't help but think about why Mother left her own daughter at the facility and never came back, never even looked back. She just disappeared and Ruby had hardly a clue how to ever find her. Or if she even  _wanted_ to be found. Surely, she would have heard the news of her daughter escaping Baelfire.

And the thought of maybe running into her again scared Ruby.

"Ruby, that's a bit tight." Belle said.

Realizing she'd been tensing up, Ruby forced her hand to relax its hold on Belle's. "Sorry."

"What were you thinking about? Belle asked.

Clenching and unclenching her jaw, Ruby redirected her pent up energy into slowly rubbing circles into the back of Belle's hand. The motion of it was easy and predictable. It helped to ground Ruby back into herself, giving her enough distance from her own head to be able to answer the question. "My… my m-mother."

"Your mother?" Belle repeated.

Ruby looked away before nodded.

"You wanna talk about her, Rubes?" Emma asked.

Surprising even herself, Ruby nodded. "Okay."

The moment the response left her lips, Ruby felt all eyes turning towards her. Being under the spotlight like this reminded her too much of being put on display for Gold's investors and board members. Even if they were gathered around a fireplace, dressed in comfortable, casual clothes (some even bundled up in several layers, like Regina and Belle).

Even then, the men and women in suits still hovered at the corners of Ruby's vision.

Warmth enveloped her hand as Belle clasped it in both of hers.

This was a safe place.

Nobody was going to shock her with a prod or cut her open with a silver blade. There was no more piercing sound to drive needles into her ears and bring her to her knees. Gone were the silver-lined collars and cuffs capable of electrocuting her. No more needles to sedate her when she got too riled up.

No more Gold.

"Okay." Ruby repeated, taking a deep breath. She held it in for a moment, then released it slowly. "My… my mother. I think… I th-think…" The disconnect between the words in her head and the stutters that tripped out of her mouth were frustrating, but Ruby did her best to keep going. This was something she felt she needed to say out loud. "…I think sh-she… she was the serial killer."

There was no way to confirm it, but the more Ruby thought about it, the more it sounded like a possibility.

It couldn't be Granny. Otherwise why did the house still sometimes smell like blood even after Granny was arrested? Growing up, there had always been a distinct scent, usually coming from the basement or clouding the kitchen. It wasn't any smell she could name or recognize at the time. That and she had been so used to it that it had just faded into the background to be a part of the house.

But now, after having bathed in blood herself, after resorting to making herself bleed to cope, after being made to bleed by Gold… Ruby knew.

"Do you want me to help you?" Emma offered. "I could link everyone to you or I could link with you and translate your thoughts for you."

It was a tempting offer, but Ruby was too unnerved by all the times they'd linked minds in the past. And glancing at Belle, Ruby realized this was also something she had to try and do on her own. A small step towards recovery.

"No." Ruby shook her head. "I… I'll d-do this."

Emma nodded. "You've got this, Rubes."

Rubbing at the itchy hair growing out at the back of her head, Ruby gathered her thoughts and tried to explain. "Before… when I was… young." She was how old at the time? Seven? Eight? What she did remember was her mother telling her to stay in the room and hide under the bed. That was when she could scent men coming into the house. And they spoke to Granny. "They t-took… Granny… away."

"Your grandmother was 115 in Baelfire's files, right?" Belle asked, squeezing Ruby's hand.

Ruby nodded. "Gold had… her. I think… he made… deal…" She narrowed her eyes and tried to recall what little was said that night. Granny had spoken to the men who were taking her away. "I think… he was supposed to… leave us alone. If… if she went."

"He probably went back on that deal after he…" Emma stopped herself. She fiddled with her hands. "Well, y'know."

"I think he went too far with his tests on her." Belle spoke softly, her eyes focused on Ruby. "I'm sorry, Ruby."

Shrugging, Ruby just focused on continuing to speak. "Even after… after she was gone. The house…" As she continued to talk about it, Ruby could recall more distinctly now how the house felt and smelled. It was always at its worst during the Headache Weeks. "…the house still smelled… like blood."

As the memories started to come creeping back, Ruby shuddered. "Especially during… Headache Week." She corrected herself. "Week of… the full moon."

"Wait, do you mean to say that your mother was a raging werewolf and she's still out there?" Neal's wide eyes reflected the firelight as he leaned forward. "Ruby, do you know where she is?"

Ruby shrugged. "C-canada… maybe? She… always wanted to… move there." It was a topic that was discussed several times in the house. Often enough for Ruby to have wanted to run away so she could stay with Peter and Dorothy. Maybe Mother managed to go there and was loose there now, hunting as she pleased, free of a daughter who wouldn't even follow her rules. "Maybe Gold… helped her."

"That's… interesting." Neal was rubbing at his chin and furrowing his brow.

"Why?" Ruby asked.

"Some people, the anti-psychic ones," Neal said, "they've been using Cora and her sketchiness as an argument against whether or not Regina should get to walk free. Then there's the group of people running wild with the idea of werewolf packs being on the loose and how dangerous the next full moon is going to be."

The next full moon was indeed going to be a problem if they didn't find a way to restrain Ruby, and probably Merida as well. Hurting anyone in this circle of friendship and family was a painful thought that Ruby would rather not turn into a reality.

"How did you deal with the full moon before?" Emma asked. "Like before Gold and Baelfire and everything."

Memories of playing doctor in the basement crept their way into Ruby's consciousness. The images were hazy and confusing at first. There was the medicine that burned her throat and chest, making her choke and cough until she was on her knees, throwing up. There were chains, too. Bolted to the floors and walls of the basement. There were more as she got older.

Light, gentle circles being stroked into the back of her hand brought Ruby back to the present. Not completely, as the images still swam through her mind. But enough for her to be able to get herself to answer Emma's question.

"Playing doctor… in the basement."

"Playing doctor?" This time it was Belle's turn to show her confusion. "What do you mean by that?"

Looking across the fire, Ruby caught Merida's eye. She had calmed down from her moment with her mother and was now staring with a tense set to her features. "I remember you mentioning that before. Dorothy and Peter assumed it had something to do with herbal remedies your mum made you for your headaches."

That was what she lead friends to believe. Ruby nodded.

"What really happened in there?" Merida asked.

"Every full moon…" That was what it really was. Ruby had gone on for too long calling it just headache week when she now knew what it really was. "…we… went to the… th-the b-basement."

She could see it now. Aside from a lumpy, torn-up mattress on the side and chains scattered across the floor, it was empty. Whenever she went down to the basement, the headaches were at their peak and she rarely took in any of what was happening. It was just a haze of pain and doing whatever she was told.

"Mother… told me to drink… something." Ruby frowned, recalling how a similar test had been run at the facility, when they wanted to observe the effects of a particular substance. "It was w-wolfsbane."

"You  _drank_ wolfsbane?" This time it was Belle's turn to tighten her grip on Ruby's hands. "Why?"

Ruby shrugged. "Maybe… m-maybe to make me… easier to control."

"So she made you chug wolfsbane then left you in the basement?" Emma had put her beer down and was now leaning forward, forearms on her knees. "Or was she in there with you?"

Did she stay in the basement?

Ruby squinted at the ground, watching the dancing shadows until the basement came back to the forefront of her mind. "No. She… wouldn't stay." She rarely stayed. There were hardly any memories that Ruby could call forth that didn't involve Mother turning around and closing the door behind her.

"I remember… stripping…" Sometimes it was before the wolfsbane, sometimes it was after. Ruby could vaguely remember Mother saying the clothes were too soaked with sweat and that she would come back with fresh clothes. But she never came back until morning came.

Feeling conscious of all the attention on her, Ruby took a sip of water. She gathered her thoughts and searched for the words that were within her reach so she could best tell this story."…and… I remember being chained."

The chains weren't as specialized as the ones in Baelfire. They were crude and heavy, but they did the job of keeping her restrained since Ruby couldn't recall waking up anywhere other than back in the basement. The only time she ever woke up in a different place on the full moon was the night with Peter.

"M-mother would… come back… in the morning." Ruby managed to get herself to continue instead of dwelling on Peter's fate. "Unchain me… t-tell me to… to clean up."

"And this was going on your whole life?" Regina asked.

Ruby tried to remember how young she was when the doctor games started, but it was hard to pinpoint how long ago that was when her sense of time and aging was so distorted by her endless days in the facility.

"Not always. I was… five? Six? When doctor… started." Before the doctor games started, she just stayed in her room, locked her door and hid under her bed once a month.

"Granny… used to be… part of it." Ruby said, recalling what playing doctor was like in the early days. "She made it… almost fun. And… w-would… would c-comfort me… when the headaches came." Granny had been warmer about the procedure, holding Ruby close when the bouts of headaches would come and go. She would tell jokes and stories as she setup the chains. Then she would chain herself as well. "Granny stayed. Always."

It was so quiet in the circle that the chirp of crickets was deafening and the wind sounded like it was pressing fists into her eardrums.

"And neither of them ever told you?" Aurora said, "About being a werewolf?"

Ruby shook her head. "Never." And she had no answer as to why.

"Didn't your Granny try to stop your mom?" Mulan, who had been quiet for the most part, voiced a question. "Because it sounds like she was more in control than your mother was."

Thinking back, Ruby thought she could recall arguments breaking out between the two. But they tended to tell Ruby to leave the room when their fights escalated. "Not… sure. I think… maybe?"

"She did take one for the team." Emma pointed out. "Sounds like she turned herself in to Gold so that Mama Lucas and Ruby would be left alone. That didn't last though, did it? Since Gold's a guy who loves to take advantage of the fine print."

Ruby focused on Belle's hands, at a loss for how to respond. She didn't know what else to say anymore, but she did feel a strange sense of lightness after admitting the things she admitted and coming to terms with what the doctor games really were.

She was shivering pretty badly though, and her teeth were chattering. Belle noticed and moved around the cooler to be able to sit next to Ruby and wrap arms around her. Leaning into the contact, Ruby let herself be grounded in the present.

That past was behind her.

"It's kind of a cause for concern that a rogue werewolf is out there somewhere." Neal said, "Although I don't doubt that there are others yet that aren't related to Ruby. Still, I'll keep an eye out for any reports about Mrs. Lucas. What was her first name?"

"Anita." Ruby answered, unable to help the cringe that went through her at Mother being referred to as Mrs. Lucas. If Ruby should be stripped of the Lucas name because of misdeeds, shouldn't Mother as well? If any of them deserved to keep their name, it was Granny. She tried so hard to keep the family together and protect them.

And now she was  _gone_.

"Alright then." Neal clasped his hands together. "But that's a worry for another time."

"I volunteer Regina to go next."

"Miss Swan!" Regina bristled.

"Well we're talking about shitty moms now, so you'd be staying on topic." Emma's put her arms around Regina. "C'mon. Might help to get a good rant out."

Regina rolled her eyes but muttered. "Maybe."

Tremors were still going through Ruby's body, the excess energy working itself out of her system. But otherwise, she felt good. She said her piece and it was a weight off her chest. Now, she was ready to listen to the next speaker while holding Belle's hand.

"From the times that we've linked minds, some of you were given glimpses of my mother." Regina started. Shadows were etched deeply into her tense face as she continued. "She wasn't particularly a model parent, and after I accidentally killed my father, she was my  _only_ parent."

Mr. Dunbroch's thick brows rose up to almost touch his hairline. "What happened with your father?"

That was the incident Ruby recalled seeing when they shared visions at the facility. It had been a tense, frightening night, with a younger, less controlled Regina full of terror and pain at the sight of her arguing parents.

A pained smile pulled at Regina's scarred lips. "It was an accident. I was a child. My parents were arguing. My mother was drunk and escalating the situation. I just…" She sniffled and looked upwards at the starry night sky. "I wanted them to stop fighting. I didn't realize my power and I didn't realize what I was doing. I had blown forth power and energy that Mother easily blocked while Father…"

Releasing a shaky breath, Regina returned her gaze to the firelight. A twig on the ground next to her floated upwards on its own before tossing itself into the fire.

"He didn't survive the blast." Regina glared at the burning twig which such an intensity that Ruby huddled closer to Belle. "Mother though… she looked at me for the first time with something akin to pride."

It crossed Ruby's mind to wonder what her own mother may have expected from her daughter. Would she be like Regina's mother and hope for a violent monster-in-training, only to be disappointed by the lack of backbone Ruby showed when she awoke to Peter's remains? Or was she hoping to bring Ruby to some sort of pack and have her trained there?

The memories were distant and scattered, but Ruby thought she recalled a conversation with Mother where she was criticizing Peter and saying that in Canada there were friends available and a boy named Quinn.

"From there, all Mother wanted to do was control me and control my abilities." Regina started speaking again, her expression still hard and tense. The shadows cast on her face made her eyes look darker while her tensed jaw seemed to be carved from stone. "And of course when she didn't get her way, she had the options of supernatural, physical or verbal abuse to inflict upon me as punishment."

Regina observed the ground until she spotted another twig. It rose upwards but didn't go straight into the fire this time. "When she found out I wanted to be a doctor, she was livid." The twig snapped into two before falling back down to the ground. "I went to school in a cast the next day. Had to tell some stupid story about falling down the stairs."

"That was before I learned how to heal myself." Regina pointed at her lips. "This, too. This was the first Christmas without father. I couldn't stop crying and Mother… wanted to drink her alcohol in peace. That naturally involved throwing her third bottle at me. Empty, of course. Otherwise that would be a waste of her drink."

A loud sniffle came from Emma, who was looking at Regina with shiny eyes.

"I really want to be a doctor." Regina said. "And with my abilities, I could be efficient and accomplish so much more. Mother disagreed. She thought power was our ultimate destiny. Not that she would have had me go into law or politics anyway since she was hell-bent on keeping me close so she could continue to live off of the stipend that Gold was giving her in exchange for experimenting on me."

"You'd make a great doctor though." Emma said.

Regina pointedly looked at Mulan. "That remains to be seen."

When attention started to move on to her, Mulan shifted uncomfortably and held her injured hand closer to herself.

"Did I mention she burned my books and acceptance letters?" Regina drew all eyes away from Mulan and back to herself. Taking some more twigs and leaves with her hands, Regina lifted them up. "I tried applying to some schools and my excellent grades meant I had several offers for scholarships."

The twigs and leaves in Regina's hands started to smoke, then flickers of light sparked along the edges of the leaves. "I used my own money to buy medical textbooks. Mother found them and…" Fire erupted from Regina's hand, burning the leaves and twigs in a flash of light before leaving only ashes. "…got rid of them."

Letting the ashes fall from her hand, Regina said, "I hope she and Gold face consequences for their actions, though I fear they may still have the resources to avoid more than a slap on the wrist."

"I'm going to do whatever the fuck I can to make sure that doesn't happen." Neal's voice was gravelly and unsteady, wavering in the middle before hardening with resolve. "They're not going to get away with the shit they put us through."

Regina nodded. "Thank you."

Emma raised her hand.

Rolling her eyes, Regina turned to look at her. "Yes?"

"Was Gold's relationship with Cora like… _strictly business_  or was there a little  _something-something_  going on there?"

"I have reason to believe they may have had an affair in the past." Regina said, before looking over at Belle. "But I don't think it was longterm. Gold preferred younger women he deemed soft and pliable. There was an assistant, actually. Elena Avalor. They had something of a relationship. It wasn't explicit, of course. But I am familiar with some of his tells. And Emma could read his…  _thoughts_ about her. She eventually couldn't maintain their arrangement and quit abruptly."

"She was nice." Emma added.

"She stayed for about five years, I believe. Left about a year before the internship program with Aurora and Belle came to be." Regina said, "And we have reason to believe Gold was hoping for a similar arrangement with you, Belle. He's impulsive and erratic, but he has habits and routines that he falls back on. Emma and I noticed he was showing signs of repeating those habits to recreate with you what he had with Elena."

Belle's eyes were wide circles as she opened and closed her mouth, stammering and stuttering over a reply.

"We were pretty concerned since your thoughts made it seem like you kinda had a thing for him, too." Emma said. "But we took a chance anyway. You seemed like you might actually care just a little bit more than the others. And Regina was right about that. Or we wouldn't be here now, would we?"

"I…" Belle tightened her grip on Ruby. "Yes. You two took a risk, reaching out to me. And okay, fine. I guess I felt some semblance of  _something_ for Gold. But that was gone fast as soon as I realized what he was truly capable of."

"Which is a good thing, dear." Regina said, "It would not have done anyone any good were you to be the type of person to forgive and brush off every act of cruelty and inhumanity he were to commit."

"Okay." Emma said, also wrapping her arms more tightly around Regina and giving her a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks for sharing your stuff, Queenie. I'm going to cover you from head to toe in kisses tonight to make up for all the love you never got."

Though Regina was rolling her eyes and pretending to push Emma away, there was a distinct smile pulling at her lips before she eventually curled into Emma. "That would be nice. I just need a moment because reliving all of those moments has got me shaking like a leaf."

"You mean like the ones you kept burning for dramatic effect?"

"Shut your mouth, Miss Swan, or I won't wake you for breakfast tomorrow."

Emma huffed. "Fine."

Though there was a lighter energy now to the circle as Emma and Regina traded playful jabs, the air was still clouded with the mixture of emotions brought about by such loaded confessions. Ruby was starting to feel drained by the wild ride she was on, hearing all these stories from everyone. And they weren't even done yet. Just about half the circle had yet to speak.

"While we're still on the subject of shit parents and Gold being creepy as f-" Emma stopped herself upon making eye contact with Mrs. Dunbroch. With a sheepish smile, Emma continued and pointed at Neal. "Mr. Baelfire? Care to share?"

"Call me that again and I'm going to hook the speakers up in your room to play Chipmunks songs on loop."

"Fine, Mr. Neal Cassidy." Emma rolled her eyes at the name. "Are you willing to talk about your thing tonight?"

Neal didn't answer right away, swishing the drink in his bottle.

"We won't force you to talk about it if you'd rather not." Mrs. Dunbroch said.

"No…" Neal took a swig of his beer. "I think… I think I need to talk about this. If not for myself, then to give you guys more of a background on that asshole."

He looked around at them, moving his now empty bottle from one hand to the other. "So Gold's my dad."

"Just for that, I think you deserve another bottle, son." Mr. Dunbroch walked over to the cooler, got two bottles and handed one to Neal. "Cheers." They clinked their bottles together before Neal took a deep, long drink while Mr. Dunbroch resumed his spot with his family.

"Did we ever meet?" Regina asked, "Because I've been going in and out of there most of my life. There was a brief time that Father convinced Mother to stop sending me there. But otherwise, Baelfire was almost a second home to me." Then, in a lower, harder tone, she added, "As much of a home as either of those were for me as I was growing up."

After taking another swig, Neal took a moment, as if to gather his thoughts, rubbing his chin and frowning, his eyes unfocused and distant.

"I'm not sure if we met other than just… in passing." Neal looked at Regina. "But I knew  _of_ you. Gold talked a hell of a lot about the tests he was running on you and how powerful your abilities were. To be honest, I was even jealous sometimes of how much he talked about you. Especially when Ma left and it was just Gold and me. He ended up having me brought straight to the facility after school. I'd have to do my homework and shi…  _stuff_... there. Sometimes I'd end up napping or whatever until he felt ready to go home."

"Was he already a sketchy, sadistic creep at the time?" Emma asked.

Regina frowned. "I can't quite recall if he was always that way or if something changed him."

A low chuckle rumbled through Neal before he answered, "Oh, he was always pretty obsessed with his work, but he was… well… more… patient?  _Merciful_?" Neal shook his head. "I can't figure out the right word for it, but he wasn't  _too bad_ in the beginning. He was the workaholic dad but he wasn't the asshole dad until Mama walked out on us. I think she fell out of love with him since he preferred his work over our company."

"But yeah, around that time, he got more impatient, more irritable. And the few times I'd actually watch him work, he got really intense with some of the subjects. When I was ten he started pressuring me to actually do work while I was in the facility. I was…" Neal looked at Ruby, his expression guilty and pained. "I interacted with 115 -er… your Granny- a few times. She talked about her granddaughter sometimes… about you."

Ruby felt her hands go cold at the thought of Granny, sad and alone in the facility. In chains and a thin gown, treated like a subject that was less than human. Denied the respect and dignity she deserved.

Swallowing, Ruby got herself to speak. "What… she… s-say?"

"I… I don't remember a lot. I was ten when Gold brought her in. And thirteen when I ran away. So it's a while back, but…" Neal rubbed the back of his neck. "But I think she mentioned hoping you find a way to be at peace. She talked about hoping you never end up in the facility and that Gold would keep his word. She really didn't want you to follow in her footsteps, or even your mom's footsteps."

It hurt to imagine Granny in the cell like Ruby. Shocked, beaten, burned, drowned and cut into like Ruby. Talked down to like Ruby. Manhandled by guards like Ruby. Injected with foreign substances like Ruby. Isolated like Ruby. Stripped naked and hosed down in the showers like Ruby.

"Did… did they treat her…" Ruby's chin quivered but she kept herself speaking. "…like… me…?"

"I mean they got you like a good four years after I left, I-"

"Neal." Emma interrupted. "You've seen a bunch of their records and a whole lot of their security footage. I'm pretty sure you can answer that question."

Neal rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged. "Well… Yes and no…?"

What did that even mean? Ruby straightened up from where she was leaning on Belle and fixed a hard stare at Neal, urging him to elaborate.

"Well… I know she was less isolated. She had a friend in an adjoining cell. A bear dude named Kenai. And I know they didn't keep her room lights eternally on like they did with Ruby." Neal fidgeted under Ruby's stare. "But in other ways, I think they were less careful with her. I mean, they were pretty excessive with you, Ruby. But they pushed her just as hard if not harder. I remember when-" The sentence came to an abrupt stop.

"What?" Ruby felt her eyes warming up and had to close them and focus on her breathing for a moment.

In…

And out.

In…

And out.

With a sigh, she opened her eyes and tried again. "What… do you… remember?"

There was something unnerving about the hesitation in Neal as he continued to fidget with the bottle in his hands and scratch at his hair.

" _Neal_." Ruby needed to know. Especially if he was being this evasive about it.

"They…" Neal avoided looking at Ruby. "They cut off a finger to see if it would regenerate. And if it would also be missing in her wolf form."

Ruby squeezed Belle's hand.

Granny had to go through that kind of torture. Other women her age would be safely enjoying their time rocking on their chairs, knitting or napping. Instead, Granny had to deal with endless agony and misery.

It was getting difficult to breathe. The fire was too hot and Belle's arms were too tight and constricting. Ruby pulled away from Belle and stood up.

There was anger. Hot and burning as it scorched through her limbs and grew behind her eyes. Digging her claws into her palms, Ruby paced back and forth, fighting the urge to turn into a wolf and go running straight back to the facility just so she could tear out Gold's throat.

The very thought of committing such a violent act frightened Ruby, but the shame and fear wasn't strong enough to overpower the anger.

"Ruby-"

Holding up a bloody hand, Ruby stopped Belle in her tracks. "I need… I need to… run." Without another word, Ruby turned and charged off, heading for the trees, giving in to the wolf and its call to run and leap and howl away the pain and sorrow.

Belle moved to run after Ruby but was stopped by a hand on the shoulder.

"I'll go after her." Merida said, and with a smile added, "Besides, if she's in a dangerous mood, I'm less likely to  _die_ if I confront her."

Reluctant to let someone else go and check on Ruby when she was in such a distraught state, Belle forced herself to see the sense in Merida's words, even if they were half-joking. Even if Belle had managed to help calm Ruby through several close calls, this one looked different. There was a greater intensity to it than before and Belle had a feeling it would be harder to talk Ruby down from this without being put at risk.

The reckless part of Belle was willing to take that risk, ready to face Ruby, come what may.

"Look, even if you did have the right stuff to calm her down, you're not going to be able to catch up to her or track her down." Merida put her hands on Belle's shoulders. "Let me do this. Please."

With a sigh, Belle fought off the urge to go running into the woods and just nodded instead.

Returning the nod, Merida took off after Ruby, running faster than any human would have been able to.

"I'm sorry…" Neal whispered, wiping at his eyes. "I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't have-"

"Hey, no, it's okay." Belle walked over to Neal and put a hand on his shoulder. "Gold is the real enemy here." As she said this, a cringe ran through her at the thought of how there had ever been some semblance of an attraction for him.

"Would anyone mind if Mulan and I turned in ahead?" Aurora asked. "I think Ruby just needs to run things off." She fidgeted and looked at Belle. "I mean if there's any emergency and she needs us, we'll be up and about to help, of course. It's just… Mulan's hand…"

"Aurora…" Mulan's protest was soft, lacking in conviction as she cradled her hand. "I'm fine."

"She needs rest." Aurora said. "So we'll go ahead, if that's okay."

"Yeah, go ahead." Belle said, echoed by several murmurs of agreement from the group.

Neal stood up as well. "I think I need to sleep this off." He looked at Belle. "I'm sorry again."

Belle shook her head and clapped him on the back. "Just get some rest, Neal. Don't worry about it." Gradually, the rest of the group also started to stand up and head back into the cabin. Mr. Dunbroch put out the fire while Mrs. Dunbroch and the boys picked up the empty bottles. Belle overturned the cooler to drain the excess water.

Once they finished packing up, most of them retreated to their rooms, with Killian promising that they continue tomorrow since not everyone got the chance to speak. Belle had yet to take the floor, as well as Mulan and Aurora. Emma and Merida also hadn't had the chance to speak on their own, only so far giving their input occasionally.

It was almost juvenile, meeting in a circle to tell their stories and share their confessions. Belle remembered doing similar things when she was in high school and even college, but those usually involved talking about one's crushes and weird fantasies.

This felt similar, but different in the rawness of it. And hopefully talking about their experiences would help them all heal.

Belle hoped they would do this regularly. Hopefully they would be free to live their lives sooner than later. Hopefully _at all_.

But right now, most of all, Belle hoped Ruby would come back soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS CHAPTER WAS A RIDE. Whose story hit you most? Who are you looking forward to hearing from in the next chapter? I know some people were pumped for more Mulan. Don't worry, if this fic decides to obey my outlines, there's going to be quite a bit of Mulan in the next chapter. BECAUSE GOSH I MISS HER HAVING MORE SPOTLIGHT, GURL STOP HIDING IN THE BACKGROUND UGH.


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ENJOY THIS LONG AF CHAPTER HUMANS. It has many feelings and it's one hell of a ride yo.

Branches whipped at her face and legs, but she kept running, pushing herself in a blind charge, taking random turns and climbing up rocky hills. It helped to focus on nothing more than the wind in her fur, the ground beaneth her paws. Each stride propelled her forward, power rippling through her shoulders.

They cut her up. They experimented on her. They used her and discarded her like she didn't mean anything to anyone. Piece by piece. They took her soul.

Granny deserved better than that. She  _was_ better than that.

A growl rumbled in the wolf's chest as she pictured the cruel little man who relished and abused the power he held over his subjects. Each experiment was a game of discovery for him, a nightmare of pain for those under him.

Granny shouldn't have even been in that facility. Not if she was never really the killer. Not if the house still smelled like blood even after she was gone. Not if Mother was so experienced with cleaning blood from clothes and maintaining a stoic expression the morning after a full moon. Not when Mother was so hell-bent on leaving the country and finding others of her own kind.

The ground came to a sudden stop under the wolf and before she realized it, she was skidding down a sheer drop. Her claws scrambled for purchase on the loose earth, the frantic motions sending her tumbling to the ground below, crash-landing into the damp soil of the riverbed.

Whimpering as her body healed itself of bruises and cuts, the wolf slowly pulled herself to her feet and shook the mud from her pelt.

Ripples covered the surface of the water as droplets flew from her fur.

The pain in her chest had dulled from the run but it still throbbed, still filled her with thoughts of Granny and the torture she didn't deserve.

A howl tore out of the wolf as she tried to release the pain in a song of sorrow. It echoed through the trees, the notes carried away by the wind.

She howled for Granny, for her forgotten death, for her ruined reputation, for her lost time. Another howl filled the woods, this one for the other subjects- for Emma and the misery she went through, for Regina and her lost childhood, for Merida and her shattered family, for all the subjects who were reduced to just numbers and paperwork.

As she looked up at the sky and tried to find the answer to what path she was supposed to go from here, the wolf let out another howl. This time, it was for those who suffered and strained themselves in their drive to help those who didn't have the means to help themselves. It was for Mulan, who suffered great pains at Gold's hands. For Aurora and Neal and Killian, who worked together to supply the team and fulfill their needs, even at great risk to themselves.

And for Belle.

Belle, who was patient and kind and loving and gentle and so strong. So very strong in ways the wolf couldn't imagine how to be.

The wind shifted and a scent reached the wolf's senses, followed by the sound of shifting earth and falling rubble.

Looking behind her, the wolf saw Merida skidding her way down the drop, using her claws to control her descent. Along the last few feet, she jumped and landed lightly on her toes, then turned to the wolf.

"Ruby?" Merida moved carefully, each step slow and deliberate as she brought herself closer. "You there?"

Standing up, the wolf suddenly felt aware of how bare she now was. Shock went through her as it dawned on her how seamless the transformation had been. Her eyes still felt warm with the glow of the wolf's, and her claws were still out. But looking down at herself, she saw pale skin and long legs.

"Yeah." Ruby's voice was still hoarse, but she could feel her throat starting to clear while the warm glow around her eyes faded away. "I'm… h-here."

Merida worked herself out of her hoodie and tossed it to Ruby. "Here."

Catching the hoodie, Ruby pulled it on. It was shorter on her than it was on Merida, and it barely covered her pelvis, but it was better than nothing.

"I tried to find your clothes, but they were either torn up or really muddy." Merida moved closer until they were mere inches away from each other. "Do you wanna talk for a bit?"

Ruby looked away and fiddled with the drawstrings of Merida's hoodie.

What was there to say? Gold destroyed  _so_  many lives and there was a chance that he might walk free if the investigation was stopped by his money and his network of connections. The fact that he may be able to avoid repercussions for his actions the way Mother did was aggravating.

"Feel… bad." Ruby managed to say, "Helpless. Sad. Angry…  _Guilty_."

"Why do you feel guilty?"

Ruby shrugged. "I'm… a monster. Mother… was a monster. Granny… tried to… protect us." She tried to say more but the words were stuck again and she choked on them. Her chin trembled and her legs felt unsteady.

"And she got herself punished for it." Merida reached over and put a hand on Ruby's shoulder. "She tried to protect her family by turning herself in. I'm pretty sure my Mum or my Dad would've done the same."

"But… why?"

"Love? Family? Selflessness?" It was Merida's turn to shrug. "Selfless love for family?"

Ruby didn't know how to respond to that. She dug her hands into the hoodie pockets and looked up at the sky.

It still fascinated her, how big and vast it was. After spending so much time with just the facility roofs above her head, with the lights always on in her cell, Ruby still found great fascination in the night sky. There wasn't a gradient of colors to it like with sunrise or sunset, but the clouds were fascinating and the moon was beautiful.

The moon enslaved Ruby, controlled her emotions and body, subjected her to its whims.

But there was still a beauty and power to it that Ruby couldn't help but respect.

"What she went through was shitty," Merida said. "What  _you_ went through was shitty. What  _I_ went through was shitty. The shit we  _all_ went through was fucked up. But you know what that means?"

Ruby looked away from the sky and turned her gaze to Merida. "What?"

The smile on Merida's face was pained. "If you think about it, you can almost be  _glad_ that Dorothy had a quick end instead of winding up like all of us." Her sigh came out as a foggy cloud that hung in the air. "Because you and I both know that those claw marks you left on her might have been deep enough to turn her if the shelf didn't kill her."

It hurt to remember that awful day.

Dorothy just wanted to help. She cared for Ruby and was being nothing more than a concerned friend. And death was the price to be paid for that.

"I wish…" Ruby swallowed. "I wish… I… could have… d-done things… diff… differently." It was hard to look Merida in the eye now, and Ruby occupied herself with staring at the ground, jaw tense, brow furrowed. "Should have… obeyed Mother's… rules. Maybe Peter and… and Dorothy… would still… b-be… alive."

When Merida's hand tightened its hold on Ruby's shoulder, she expected a shove and a string of curses, but instead she found herself being pulled closer, into an embrace.

Feeling her eyes warming up with tears instead of the wolf's power, Ruby buried her face into Merida's shoulder and clung to her shirt. "I'm sorry."

"I know." Merida whispered.

They stayed that way for a moment, clinging to each other, shoulders growing damp with each other's tears. Soft sobs were the only sounds they exchanged as they both thought of the past and dwelled on their scars. Merida was pressing her face against Ruby's shoulder, balling up the hoodie in tight fists. It was strange to be this vulnerable around someone who not so long ago was determined to kill her.

But now, here they stood. Ruby had her arms around Merida's shoulders and a hand against the back of her head, stroking the short hair that was finally given the chance to start growing out.

"I loved her." Merida's voice was shaky and broken, muffled into Ruby's shoulder. "She made me so happy. We… we got along so well."

Ruby had managed to take control of herself and now focused on calming Merida, stroking her hair and whispering stuttered words of comfort to her. "Sh-she loved… you… too."

Merida pulled away to look at Ruby with teary eyes. "I wish I could wake up and go back and find a way to keep Dorothy from meeting her fate. Make sure she somehow wasn't in that classroom that day." She sniffed and moved back into the hug, pressing her cheek against Ruby's chest. "But it's done and nothing can be done to change it."

"Yeah…" It was painful to accept the fact that they had no other choice but to accept the past.

"Best we can do is move on," Merida sighed, "and continue to live with this reality."

Ruby rested her chin on top of Merida's head. "She… was lucky… to have found love… with you."

Memories of Dorothy were drifting through Ruby's head. She couldn't help but think about the sleepover when Dorothy told Ruby about liking girls. Turmoil had accompanied the confession as Ruby wondered if she felt those things herself. "You weren't… afraid… to love her."

Another sob broke through Merida as she pushed her face closer to Ruby's shoulder. "I loved her… I loved her so much…"

Swallowing, Ruby whispered words she never thought she would have said out loud. Never would have admitted to even herself until after it was all too late.

"I did too."

Pulling away just enough to be able to look at Ruby's face, Merida's brow furrowed. "Not like I did, Ruby."

It was too late to turn back now. If she always thought about Peter and Dorothy as the boy she loved and the girl she was afraid to love, then it was time that someone knew.

" _Exactly…_  like you did." Ruby said, forcing herself to maintain eye contact with Merida. "I just… didn't have… didn't have the… the  _guts…_ " Her body was trembling and she found herself tightening her grip on Merida to steady herself. "…didn't have the guts… to  _go for it_ … like you did."

"I…" Merida shook her head, her shining eyes now wide open. "What…?"

Ruby couldn't maintain the eye contact anymore. She looked towards the river. "She… deserved you… You were… great… for her."

"Ruby…" Merida squeezed Ruby's arms.

Unable to control her trembling, Ruby pulled away from the embrace and hugged herself. She focused on looking at the river, watching the gentle lap of the water as it flowed away.

"I'm… I'm happy… that she… got to be happy… with you." Ruby swallowed and it felt thick and painful going down her throat. Her voice came out tight and strained. "I hope… I hope you… get to be happy… like that… again."

If anyone deserved to feel that love and happiness again, it was Merida. After her life was destroyed by Ruby's carelessness, after she was toyed with and tortured by Gold, after she watched her family suffer, after she spent years surviving on hatred and anger…

She deserved to find happiness again. Happiness, peace, love.

"I hope that for you, too." Merida said. "I hope you can be happy again, too. And loved. And  _not_ be afraid to go for it anymore."

Surprised, Ruby turned to look at Merida. "Really?"

" _Really_."

The response and accompanying confirmation was so stunning that Ruby couldn't even come up with what to say in response. Her mouth opened and closed uselessly before settling into just gaping open.

"And Ruby?"

Finally finding her voice, Ruby managed to choke out a word. "Y-yeah?"

"I…" Merida exhaled and dug her hands deep into her pockets. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "I forgive you."

Totally floored, Ruby thought her legs might give way underneath her if Merida didn't come and pull her in for another hug.

And they spent another moment in each other's arms, this time feeling lighter, feeling almost at peace. Or as close to at peace as they could ever come.

"By the way," Merida was smirking now as she pulled away and raised an eyebrow at Ruby. "If you were kind of gay for Dorothy, are you kind of gay for Belle?"

Ruby's eyes widened and she had to blink a few times to get herself back to the present. Even she didn't know the certain answer to that question, Ruby felt like  _'no'_ was definitely not it.

"I… don't… know." Ruby said, then she shrugged. It was hard to sort through the feelings since they were mixed up with all kinds of other thoughts. And Ruby had spent so much time hating herself and denying herself humanity that emotions as complicated as this was difficult to sort through. "I…  _maybe…_?"

* * *

It was cold, waiting at the porch. Belle's breaths came out as puffs of fog. Suppressing a shiver, she dug her hands deeper into her jacket pockets and brought her feet up on the chair, curling her knees close to her body.

The howls weren't hard to miss.

Belle could hear them and hated how pained they sounded.

When they stopped, Belle's worry only intensified. She didn't know if that meant Ruby was off running even further from the cabin or if Merida had caught up to her. It was impossible to know and not knowing was giving Belle major anxiety.

As much as it was a concern that Ruby might be getting attached to Belle in an overly dependent way, Belle realized that the same was a possibility for herself. She was antsy when Ruby went on the run with the bears and admittedly a touch jealous of the closeness that Ruby and Merida were developing.

Which was stupid.

Ruby finding friendship and building relationships outside of Belle was desirable. It was recommended, even. Otherwise her social skills would remain stunted if she was dependent on Belle or even took Emma up on the offer to link and serve as a translator of sorts.

It was great though that Ruby turned down the offer and chose to speak for herself. Belle was proud of her for that, and extremely proud of how Ruby found the strength and courage to keep talking and share her story. The confession had taken a toll on Ruby, but she seemed lighter for it.

Then Neal talked about Gold and everything went to shit.

But Merida was going to talk to her.

Belle pushed away the ridiculous feelings of jealousy. She focused on the fact that someone who experienced the facility in much the same way as Ruby did would be able to voice thoughts and reveal epiphanies that Belle might not be able to.

The door opened, interrupting Belle's swirling thoughts. She looked over her shoulder and was surprised to see Mulan by the doorway, hand held close to her chest.

"Hi, Belle." In Mulan's other hand were blankets, and she offered one. "Thought you might be cold."

"Thank you." Accepting the blanket gratefully, Belle wrapped it around herself curled up on the chair, waiting for the shivers to subside. "Would you like to sit with me?"

"Yeah. Thanks." It was more of a struggle for Mulan to wrap the second blanket around herself, but she managed before Belle could move to offer help. Mulan settled into the other chair and looked out towards the woods. "The howling seems to have stopped."

"I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing." Belle hugged her legs and rested her chin on her knees. "You couldn't sleep?"

Mulan shook her head. "The pain was bothering me."

"Why aren't you taking the painkillers Aurora keeps offering?"

Leaning her head back against the chair, Mulan said, "I'd rather not get hooked on it. And I'd rather not mix more foreignness into my body. I already have Regina pushing and pulling things around supernaturally. That's more than enough."

"Fair enough." Belle would have preferred Mulan take something for the pain, and didn't quite understand the reasoning. But this was her body and Belle had a feeling that finding some sense of agency in choosing what would and wouldn't go into Mulan's body was another factor in her decision.

"I'm worried about you, though." Belle admitted, rubbing at her temples. Though the alcohol had mostly worn off by now, there was still a feeling of heaviness to her head.

Mulan adjusted the blanket around herself. "I'm fine."

"We all know you aren't." Belle looked over at Mulan, who just shrugged. "You can talk to us, you know. I understand that you're used to fading into the background and keeping your thoughts to yourself." That came with the job, for sure. Mulan's work required that she quietly stand by in the background, but that didn't mean she needed to maintain the same protocols of silence and passivity among this group of friends.

"You don't have to, you know." Belle continued. "You're not at work anymore."

Mulan didn't answer right away, continuing to stare at the roof of the porch, her head leaning back against the chair. She lifted her good hand and ran her fingers through her hair, cut short from when she and Aurora tried to alter their appearances.

Looking back, Belle felt both amused and embarrassed by how much effort they put into their changing their looks while Emma and her group barely bothered with more than wearing hats and keeping their heads down. They even had the gall to get drunk and make a scene at a bar.

Then again, they had Neal with them and he could easily alter security cameras and block police scanners.

"There's another reason I can't sleep." When Mulan spoke again, her voice was soft while her face was hard and tense. "When I do… I tend to have nightmares."

"Of the facility?"

With a shaky sigh, Mulan nodded. "Been having them every night since the escape. Aurora's usually in too deep sleep to notice. Her sleep has gotten a lot better since realizing her powers. Now she actually  _enjoys_ going to sleep, I think."

"And now you don't."

"Yeah…"

Mulan straightened up and adjusted the blanket with her good hand. She rubbed at her hair again, making the short strands stick out at odd ends. "Sometimes… sometimes I feel like…" She held out her damaged hand, which was still swollen, with skin coated in so many bruises barely any of the colors on it looked natural. "…like this is my punishment."

The train of thought was painfully familiar, not unlike how Ruby rationalized the pain she experienced in the facility.

"What makes you think that?" Belle asked, worry and concern evident in her voice.

"For allowing Gold to torture Ruby for so long." Mulan rubbed her injured hand before cradling it close to her stomach. "For turning a blind eye even if she felt vaguely familiar to me."

"Mulan…" Belle tried to speak but Mulan shook her head.

"I feel like the universe is giving me a taste of what Ruby had to go through alone." Mulan said, "It's not the same, and what Gold did to me is nowhere near as bad as Ruby's seven years but… but this hand and the nightmares… they feel like they're my karma."

Belle gripped the armrests of her chair and leaned towards Mulan. "No, that's not true. Mulan, out of all of us who worked to get the subjects out, you were put through the worst suffering and that's not right. You didn't deserve that."

"Didn't I?"

"Mulan,  _no_." Belle heard her voice come out cracked and pleading. "You did not. You were such a vital part to the escape. We got Ruby's  _name_ because of you. And did you forget how you used to sneak food to Ruby and hold her hand when she struggled with panic attacks?"

Jaw clenching and unclenching visibly, Mulan kept her eyes out towards the tree line.

"And your hand will heal. Regina's doing her best." Belle wanted to go over to Mulan and wrap her up in a hug but wasn't sure if Mulan was willing to engage in one. "Please try not to believe you deserved what Gold put you through?"

Mulan looked down at her hand. "Okay."

"Your hand will heal." Belle insisted. "The nightmares… that will take a while to fade away, but each day will bring us closer to more peaceful sleep." Shifting in her seat, Belle decided to add, "And I think when the time comes for us to step forward and testify against Gold, we'll be sleeping a lot easier when he's behind bars."

"That's a nice thought." Mulan said, eyes still on her hand. It twitched and trembled but otherwise barely moved. "Regina said she just needs more time to access and read through more detailed books. Neal got his hands on some pdf's for Regina and let her borrow his tablet so she could read them."

"That's good news, right?"

Mulan shrugged. "I still have my doubts." She winced as the strain of trying to move her hand seemed to send pain shooting through her. Face tense, she massaged the swollen, discolored mess from fingers to elbow.

Looking over at Belle, Mulan added, "I was disposable, according to Gold. I served my purpose as far as he was concerned. He did, after all, try to use Ruby to kill me."

"Even if you were disposable to Gold, you aren't disposable to this group." Belle said, but Mulan was shaking her head.

"Am I? Ever since we got here, I can barely do anything. You're setting tables and washing dishes while I can barely carry my own plate. You're laying out mats and carrying coolers of booze while all I do is sit and watch like… like I'm  _useless_."

"You're injured!" Belle insisted. "We're letting you heal."

"I feel like I'm just a prop here. I can't lift anything or move anything, I just sit there doing nothing!" Mulan seemed to realize she was raising her voice. She stopped and let her shoulders drop, burying her face into her good hand. "I'm sorry."

Belle stood up and walked over to Mulan. She didn't pull away at the touch of a hand on her shoulder. "Mulan, whether or not you heal, you have value to us. Like I said, we got as far as we did because of your resourcefulness. We bought enough time for Emma and the team to prepare a new plan because you didn't fold under the pressure Gold put on you. We are  _here_ because of you."

Wiping her face with her hand, Mulan looked up at Belle. "You really think so?"

"I  _know_ so." Belle squeezed Mulan's shoulder. "You've got drive and courage and I admire that so much. I hope you and Aurora can be very happy together."

Managing to smile, Mulan said, "I hope to bring her on the roadtrip I promised. As soon as my hand is better and the facility controversy is over. I want to take her on a ride with my bike, bring her somewhere nice." With a chuckle, she added, "But we need to buy her a helmet and gear first, of course."

Belle returned the smile. "Of course."

"What about you and Ruby?" Mulan asked. "Are you two also planning to live together after this?"

Nodding, Belle said, "Yes, we've talked about that in passing."

"Wait, I just want to confirm since I can be a little dense sometimes, but… uh…" Mulan rubbed the hair at the back of her neck. "You two… you're a… a  _thing_ , right?"

Furrowing her brow, Belle tilted her head to one side. "What do you mean?" She realized the habit of tilting her head had probably come from Ruby and Belle found herself straightening up.

"A  _thing_. Y'know… like… are you…  _together_ together?"

Stumbling back, Belle felt her eyes widen while her face flushed. "I… I don't, I- I mean…"

Mulan was flushed now too. "I'm sorry, that was probably… I was just… I'm sorry… I didn't mean… I'm sorry, Belle."

"I mean…" Belle put a cold hand to her suddenly warm face. "I guess… Well, I think for now…"

"They're back!" Mulan stood up and pointed towards the trees with her good hand. Belle turned and felt her chest lift at the sight of Ruby and Merida come jogging over. They were both covered in mud and leaves, and Belle blushed as she realized that Ruby was wearing nothing more than Merida's hoodie.

As they drew closer, Ruby sprinted with a burst of speed, running over and nearly knocking Belle off her feet in a move that was half hug, half tackle. She had to stumble backwards to catch herself and narrowly avoided crashing into Mulan.

"Belle." Ruby nuzzled Belle's shoulder. "Did I… worry… you?"

"Just a bit." Belle admitted, holding Ruby's back with one hand and stroking her short hair with the other. "But are you feeling better?"

"Sorry…" Ruby pulled away so she could nod. "But… yes. Feeling better."

Belle smiled. "That's good."

Ruby's expression hardened and for a moment, there was an amber glow to her eyes. "But… I want… Gold… to pay." Her eyes cooled back to their usual green, but the hard, determined look remained. "If… have to… talk to anyone… attend anything… I want to."

"Okay." Belle nodded. "We'll make sure he doesn't get away with everything he's done."

* * *

The next night found them back around the campfire at Killian's insistence after he managed to buy more beer. This time, he also got several cans of soda for Ruby and the triplets.

"So, we didn't finish letting everyone take the floor last night, mates." Killian took it upon himself to act as facilitator. He ruffled Neal's hair. "You didn't finish your piece last night. Is everyone cool with having Neal continue telling us about the shit Gold did to destroy his own family?"

Scattered nods and murmurs of agreement came as the response, until Ruby felt eyes turning to face her.

"Are you comfortable with Neal continuing?" Belle asked.

Ruby took a breath as the wave of emotions from last night settled over her once more. The anger and grief at knowing some of the suffering that Granny went through was still a pain in Ruby's chest. Talking about the facility still made her cringe and squirm with discomfort.

But if she were to be honest with herself, Ruby knew she wanted to know more. Wanted to learn more about Neal and hear his story. Wanted to get a better grasp on the monster that Gold truly was. Wanted to add fuel to the new fire in her heart that wanted to burn Gold and everything he stood for. Burn it all to the ground.

Exhaling and straightening her back, Ruby nodded. "Yes. Want… to know… more."

"Okay." Neal nodded as well. "Okay."

Rubbing his palms together and pursuing his lips, he seemed to think over where to start. "So… I mentioned Mama leaving, right? And that was a turning point for Gold and it was like one of the big things that turned him from workaholic Papa to workaholic asshole Papa."

"Why did your mom leave?" Aurora asked, "Was it because of something she did, or was there another reason?"

Neal rubbed at the back of his neck. "There were some nights where she talked about wanting to go somewhere else. Somewhere close to the ocean. And she would ask me if I wanted to go with her." Pausing, he took a swig of his bottle and sighed. "At the time, I still had faith in Gold and thought maybe someday he'd be more invested in spending time with us. I didn't like the idea of leaving him behind."

"So she left without you?" Belle said.

A nod and another swig of beer was Neal's answer, accompanied with, "She left without me."

"Just like that?" Mrs. Dunbroch's eyes were wide and horrified. She seemed to clutch Hamish more tightly. " _She left her son behind_?"

Neal shrugged. "I think she had her reasons… She left me a note though. A different one from what she left Gold." He chewed on his bottom lip for a moment, his expression tense and uncomfortable. Another sip from the bottle helped him continue. "She warned me to be careful about my powers around Gold. Suggested I practice, but never around him. And never show him how much I can really do."

"Wait, so did they both know about your abilities from an early age?" Belle asked, her arms still around Ruby. "Did they manifest early?"

" _Hello_ , my papa was the number one  _go-to_  guy for psychic stuff.  _Of course_  he knew about my powers. He really wanted to run tests with me but Mama forbade it. They argued about it pretty often, as I recall. She made the final decision to leave after a pretty big fight." Neal said, "So after she left, he kept trying to ask me if I was up for doing some tests. I kept saying no. Mostly because Mama's note told me to say no."

Neal paused again. He toyed with the now empty bottle in his hands. "If I were to be completely honest, I would have considered saying  _yes_ if it weren't for Mama's warning."

It was Regina's turn to show her surprise with raised eyebrows. "You would have been  _willing_ to be tested? By Gold?"

Accepting a fresh bottle from Killian, Neal nodded to Regina. "When your Papa spends almost every waking moment talking about this little girl he's running tests with, you get pretty jealous and want to take that girl's place. Just so you can maybe win over his love. Or at the very least, his attention."

It was strange -unnerving, even- to think about how Neal and Regina had their childhoods shaped by Gold. One starved for his attention, the other drowning in it. Ruby couldn't even begin to imagination what it must have felt like for either of them.

But, looking back, she could understand wanting to please him. Wanting even to be  _loved_ by him.

"I… understand." Ruby said, slowly, forming her words as well as forming her thoughts. "When… when I was… new…" It still made her nervous when everyone's eyes would turn to look at her, but she managed to get herself to keep going, albeit at her usual, frustratingly slow pace. "I… I wanted to… do what he said. Make him… happy… with me.  _Proud_ of me."

The gold glints in his smile were something she knew she thirsted for because that meant she did a good job.

And of course the raised voice and brandished prod were always to be avoided.

"Always hated… disappointing… him."

Nodding his head vigorously, Neal raised his beer. "Exactly! The fucker was just so good at doing this thing where you want to jump through hoops of fucking fire just so he'll tell you that you did a good job!"

Mrs. Dunbroch cleared her throat.

"Ah… sorry. Language. Yeah. I'll watch it. Sorry, ma'am."

"Thank you, Neal."

With a sheepish smile, Neal nodded to Mrs. Dunbroch.

"So what ultimately made you decide to leave?" Aurora asked. "If he was your only remaining parent after your mom left and if you were still hoping to foster a relationship with him, what changed?"

"I…" Neal swallowed visibly. He put his bottle down and clasped his hands on his lap. Ruby noticed they were trembling. "Okay. Remember I mentioned having to do work for Gold at his facility when I was ten?"

Ruby nodded along with everyone else.

Emma put a hand on Neal's shoulder. "You got this."

A low whistle whooshed out of Neal as he shifted uncomfortably. An uneasy smile formed on his face. Stiff and not reaching his eyes. His chin looked like it was trembling too.

"Okay." He pursued his lips and sniffs. "Okay, let's do this."

"If you can't, mate, we won't force you." Killian offered.

Neal shook his head. "Nah, mate. Even you should know this." He took a deep breath, bracing himself. "Okay. I did work for him like I was told to, and while I generally had access to most of the facility, there… there was a sector he never allowed me to go to."

In the flickering firelight, Ruby could see how shiny Neal's eyes were as he continued to speak in a voice that grew shaky and unsteady. "I was… I was around eleven when he grumbled something about how I can check out the other sector. But I still need clearance for certain files."

"What was he hiding?" Belle asked, her voice soft and stunned.

"When I was thirteen, after seeing more and more of how shhh…cruel he was to the subjects…" Neal swallowed, took another deep breath. "I used my powers to look into their system. I'd been practicing quietly, so I figured I was ready to do it without getting caught."

He sniffled and wiped at his eyes.

"Neal…" Emma reached over and took one of Neal's trembling hands, clasping it in both of her own.

"Gimme a sec." Neal breathed.

Killian shifted closer to Neal and took his other hand, mirroring Emma's position. "We're here, mate. Take all the time you need."

"Okay." Neal exhaled and straightened up, his eyes clearly wet with tears that glinted in the flickering light of the fire. "I… I saw my Mama's file."

Ruby felt her own eyes widen while Belle spoke up, "He was _keeping her there_?"

Neal nodded.

"Did she…" Ruby cleared her throat. "…have… powers?"

"No."

Blinking, Ruby took a moment to process the information. She frowned and tilted her head, trying to figure out how best to ask her next question. The fact that Gold had a regular human with no abilities in his facility was jarring and it meant that what he did to Mulan and Belle after the first escape attempt wasn't a first-time incident.

"Neal…" Regina started.

Unclasping his hand from Emma's so he could wipe his eyes, Neal kept his head down. "Gimme a moment."

A heavy, suffocating silence settled over the group. Ruby huddled closer to Belle, leaning into her and clutching her arm.

"Her file showed his notes… trying to figure out where my powers came from." Neal continued, his voice soft and breathy. "If she had any… unusual resistance… to electricity. If he could…  _awaken_ anything in her."

"Shit…" Killian put an arm around Neal's shoulders. "Mate, I'm sorry."

Neal shook his head. " _Gold_  should be sorry. My mother didn't survive the tests he put her through." A growing hardness took hold of Neal's voice as he continued to speak. "After I went through her file, I was pissed as hell. I burst into his office and confronted him. He rationalized and explained everything away and that…"

Lifting his head from where he had it pressed against his hand, Neal looked around at them. "That was when I realized he didn't deserve my love. That he was sick and cruel and  _messed up_. I told him I was done with him. I was done with the facility."

"Then you walked out on him?" Aurora asked.

"He tried to stop me." Neal said, "At the lobby, he had guards try to apprehend me. I remember he said some shit about stopping the nonsense and showing proper respect a father deserves. Or I'd be spending a week as a subject having my powers tested."

"What the  _actual_ fuck?" Killian spat out the words, his face growing red. "I mean seriously, what the  _fuck_?"

Neal nodded to Killian."Exactly."

"How did you get past the guards?" Mulan asked.

"I was still getting the hang of more major overrides with my powers," Neal said, "But I managed to short-circuit the lobby doors and shut off the power in the lobby. While everyone was caught off guard, I took off."

A low chuckle rumbled in Neal. "I took his car even if I didn't really know how to drive. I was just thirteen, after all. But I bailed out of it eventually, of course. Otherwise he could use it to trace me. Then I walked and wandered till I basically passed out close to a place where Killian was dealing. And, well.."

He nudged Killian. "The rest is history."

"Shit." Aurora sighed. "That's… that's a lot to take in, Neal."

"We have to make him pay." Belle tightened her grip on Ruby. "He's not going to get away with what he's done to all of us. We have to do something."

Neal nodded. "I'm working on it, pulling up receipts with Regina since we've known him longest. I'm also keeping track of the stuff going down with the investigation and the surrounding discourse. Maybe in another couple of weeks, we can talk again about if we should testify or not."

"I… want to." Ruby said.

"Okay." Neal said. "I'll keep that in mind. Thanks, Ruby. And… by the way…" He rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm sorry about last night."

Shaking her head, Ruby said, "No… not your fault."

Neal raised his beer. "We'll bring him down. One way or another."

"Aye," Mr. Dunbroch raised his bottle as well. "He'll pay for what he's done."

"Down with Gold and down with Baelfire." Killian also lifted his drink as the rest of the group followed suit, Ruby and the triplets joining in with their soda.

When the chorus of "Down with Gold," died down, Ruby looked around the campfire and wondered who would go next and share their story. Mulan tended to be quiet for the most part and Ruby wondered about her. They didn't really know each other in school, but Mulan managed to remember Ruby enough to find her name. And Mulan had shown kindness and gentleness to Ruby as much as was possible given their circumstances at the facility.

Ruby hoped to learn more about Mulan tonight.

"Belle, why don't you take the floor next?" Killian asked. "I mean besides Emma, you're the MVP who got this whole gig moving along. What do you say, mate?"

Turning to look at Belle, Ruby nodded, also eager to hear more about her life.

"Oh…" Belle shifted in her sitting position and tightened her grip on Ruby's hand. "Um, sure."

"How did you find out about the internship?" Aurora asked.

With her free hand, Belle toyed with her bottle, swirling the drink inside. "Gold gave a seminar in my school. At the time I was… well…" She cringed. "…very in  _awe_ of him. When I approached him after his talk, he gave me his card and told me about the internship."

"So he really talked to you about it?" Aurora said, rubbing her chin and looking intrigued. "I had to search for it on his website. Then I applied and got through the screening process somehow."

"I'm not going to forget how he used my thesis to find Elsa and bring her to Baelfire." Belle's voice grew hard and cold. "I hope she and her sister are okay now. I hope Gold doesn't walk free from everything he's done."

"Would you 'ave still helped bust us out?" Emma's words were loud and slurred as she leaned against Regina. "If Regina and I didn't reach out t'you, would you jus'be Gold's bae?"

"Well…" Belle drank up what was left of her bottle before putting it aside. "Like I said last night, I may have felt something for him, but that was gone as soon as I realized what he was truly capable of."

"Yeah, but part of what drove you t'see that was me'n' Reggie, right?" Emma's face was flushed and her eyes looked unfocused as she swayed while she spoke. "Would you have still seens'it? On y'own? Would you have still wansted to help us lowly labrats?"

Looking down, Belle leaned her head on Ruby's arm. "I… I did try to rationalize away some of the more questionable things I saw…"

"I did too." Aurora admitted.

Belle nodded to her. "Yeah. I feel like Gold was good at making everything look like it was all standard procedure. And he  _did_  make it a point to keep Ruby and the Dunbrochs hidden from anyone who wasn't authorized to know about them. But… but I think I would have still seen the cruelty for what it was."

"Does this've summin do withor mom?" Emma's slurs were growing less intelligible as she took swig after swig of her beer, waving her hands around as she spoke. "I get… I got flashesover from you… sometimes."

"Emma Swan, if you spill your beer on me, you're spending the night in the living room." Regina warned, dodging Emma's wild gestures with the bottle.

Emma moved in to place a sloppy kiss on Regina's cheek. "Sorry, babe." Then Emma pointed her beer at Belle. "So…?"

Belle's face showed her discomfort and this time it was Ruby's turn to squeeze her hand and wrap an arm around her. "You… okay?"

With a sigh, Belle said. "Yeah. I think I can talk about this." She looked at Ruby, the pain of long-buried memories came to the surface of those blue eyes. Belle waited for a nod from Ruby and another squeeze of the hand before proceeding.

"My mother… She was a psychic too." Belle said, "I mentioned this to Ruby the other night. She had abilities close to Emma's, but they were more erratic, and based on her journals, it seemed like they were triggered very easily, at the mildest stimuli. Even the slightest contact could plunge her into another person's thoughts. And when she was out in a crowd, she would tend to get overwhelmed by the influx of thoughts and emotions and…"

Brushing her hair back, Belle backtracked. "Well, yeah. In the most clinical sense, she was a psychic with little to no control over her abilities."

"What happened to her, dear?" Mrs. Dunbroch asked.

Belle bit her lip and looked at the fire. "She… she committed suicide."

The crackling fire filled the brief silence that followed.

Aware of the light shivers starting to take hold of Belle's body, Ruby rubbed circles into her back, hoping to soothe and encourage her. "I'm… sorry." She whispered.

"It happened when I was five, so I don't really… I don't really have my own memories of her." Belle said, "And it was back when Papa and I were still staying in Australia."

"I knew your accent was Australian!" Emma burst out. "Regina and I were betting on if'was New Zealand or Australian. We thought 'tmight be British or some'in at first."

Regina hushed Emma while Belle just nodded and continued. "Yes, we're from there. I was eight when we moved. Never really managed to shake off the accent. Papa got an opportunity here and thought it would be for the best since the painful memories in the house wouldn't dull. I was ten when the newsreports about Baelfire… about Neal going missing were circulating."

"Oh yeah…" Neal nodded, "I remember Gold had my face and my old name all over the place. It's why Killian and I came up with a new name for me. Hiding my face was a bit trickier, but I did get to grow my hair out for a bit and that made me less recognizable." With a small smile, he added, "Although long hair really didn't suit me so after about a year or two I cut that shit off. The search for me died down by then anyway."

"Yeah…" Belle said, "I… Yeah. That's how I found out about Baelfire Research Center. And that kind of got me very interested in psychics and supernaturals. While other kids were watching cartoons and talking about superheroes, I spent a lot of time getting my hands on every other book I could about psychics and supernaturals. I mean besides the usual fiction books of course. I still enjoyed reading fiction as a hobby. But my childhood obsession was  _psychics_."

"So you developed a fascination for the likes of us early in your life?" Regina eased a bottle out of Emma's reach. "Did that last all the way until high school? College?"

Belle toyed with her hand still clasped in Ruby's. "There was a time that it dulled for a bit. I… I was twelve when Papa was making big progress with setting up his flowershop. In the chaos of having stuff all over the house, I… I came across Mama's diaries."

A low whistle came from Neal. "That must have sucked."

Trembling, Belle shifted closer to Ruby, who tightened her grip. "It  _did_. I was twelve when I read about how she couldn't bear to be near me. I read about how she believed a dead mother was better than a damaged one. And that… that was a very difficult year for me, trying to process that. I eventually talked to Papa about it and he tried to assure me that it wasn't my fault, that there was nothing that any of us could have done."

Belle's jaw clenched and she managed to put firmness into her voice. "I think that was when I decided that wasn't acceptable. That doing nothing? Accepting that nothing could be done? I decided that I would never settle for that. That I would always do  _something_."

She turned to look at Ruby, meeting her eyes. "That even if someone thought they might believe they're beyond saving, I would find a way to help them through that. I would do something.  _Anything_. Because nobody deserves to feel like a slave to their condition, beyond retribution."

The rush of resolve coming from Belle was almost overwhelming. Ruby felt both stunned and touched. Warmth rushed through her as the concept of Belle helping Ruby no matter what, helping her heal and recover and learn to stand on her own… the concept of it felt more concrete now than it ever did before. More than Ruby would have thought possible.

At a loss for how to express herself, Ruby settled for burying her face into Belle's shoulder and pulling her in for a tight hug.

"No matter how long it takes. I'm with you, Ruby." Belle promised. Then she loosened the hug and turned to the group. "It was during a school trip, one of those  _'What do you want to be when you grow up?_ ' trips that I came across Baelfire again. That's when I decided to go into the field. Then I went to college, majored in the supernatural and well… the rest, you already know."

"Ruby'n'Belle are so fuckin' cute." Emma slurred.

"Shut up, Emma." Regina rolled her eyes. "You're drunk."

"Are you two gonna like… live together'n'stuff affer dis?" Emma asked, trying to reach for another bottle, which Regina was sliding further out of reach.

Not sure how to process the sudden heat rushing to her face, Ruby just nodded and turned to Belle, hoping she would be able to answer the question.

Belle's face was also flushed, but her voice held more composure than her trembling body did. "Yes, Emma. We've toyed with the idea of that. Although if it were up to me, I'd love if we could all live together like this if we could. I got so used to being connected to all of you that it feels almost painful to think about parting ways."

"I feel you, bro!" Emma lifted both her hands. "Tolally feel you."

"It's a lovely thought, yeah." Aurora agreed.

"So're you two… like… officially… a thing or…?" Emma's bleary eyes wouldn't leave Ruby and Belle and it was starting to get uncomfortable.

"Swan, can you just-"

"Why don't you take the floor, Emma?" Killian suggested. "You're drunk out of your mind anyway."

"Actually," Emma leaned against Regina and pointed at Aurora. "I wanna hear from Sleeping Beauty over there. And maybe Mulan too. Can they go next?"

"Oh," Aurora's eyes widened and she looked at Mulan.

"C'mooon," Emma grinned, "Tell's how you got into paranormal and supernatural and psychicnotnormal shizz!"

Neal clasped his hands together and pleaded with Aurora, "Please, just share anything or whatever before she starts begging really obnoxiously."

"If Emma is this loud now, I can imagine how it created a scene when they went to that bar." Belle whispered to Ruby. She nodded, vaguely recalling the story they told several days ago of the trouble Emma, Regina and Neal got into when the group parted ways to hide and wait for Killian's signal.

"Okay." Aurora said. "I could talk about what it was like, growing up with my Grannies and my parents. And what it was like dealing with the insomnia and the strange dreams."

"I am  _ready_!" Emma shouted. This time she was shushed by Neal, Killian and Regina.

Aurora put her bottle aside and straightened up, one hand clasping Mulan's good one. "I always struggled with sleeping. Growing up, insomnia was always a problem with me. Sometimes my dad would sing lullabies or read poetry to me until I finally fell asleep. But every night, my sleep was erratic. I would either have nightmares of people I didn't know, going through pain or suffering. Or I would wake up and not know where I was. No matter how much I would run, I couldn't find my home. No matter who I tried to talk to, I couldn't get anyone to respond to me, to even  _look_ at me or acknowledge my presence."

"So that was your astral projection, wasn't it?" Belle said, "Your consciousness wandering and you couldn't contact anyone because you were there but not really  _there_."

"Exactly." Aurora agreed. "It took me just about my whole life up to this point to figure out what my dreams really were. To be honest, I have you to thank for that, Belle. If you hadn't opened my eyes to the reality that my dreams weren't just dreams, then I would probably still be living on coffee during the day and alcohol during the night."

"Thaf soundssike living d'life though." Emma hiccupped, wrapping her arms around Regina.

Regina looked to be growing irritated as she shook her head and whispered, "Emma, no."

Seeming to choose to ignore Emma's interruption, Aurora continued, "My insomnia and strange dreams did open up interest in studying sleep. It was during my research that I learned of astral projection and similar conditions. That was when I decided to switch majors and focus on the supernatural, with a focus on sleep-related conditions."

A short, clipped laugh came from Aurora. "I don't know how I never connected my research with my own symptoms. Although admittedly, I never did have an opportunity to check if my dreams were real until they intersected with what Belle witnessed in the facility."

"You saw Gold running his sick tests on us, didn't you?" Regina asked. "The night of the full moon? When he made us…" Hesitating, she looked across the fire to Ruby. "When we were forced to take control of Ruby."

Shuddering at the memory, Ruby clenched her jaw and looked away from Regina's eyes. The memories from the wolf's perspective were very vague, but the feeling of losing control of her own body as it was forced into position was vivid enough to make Ruby cringe.

"Thas wassor you got checked permarortly, right?"

"Yes, Emma." Regina said, somehow managing to understand Emma's garbled words. "That was the night I became a detained subject at Baelfire and that… that honestly made me realize how much I had. How great was the privilege of being able to step outside after every time I went in."

Belle was stroking circles into the backs of Ruby's hands. "If it's any consolation, that night became the turning point that pushed forward the move to break you all out."

"Did… did you…" Ruby cleared her throat, swallowed, tried again, "Did you have… other dreams? About… me? About… facility?"

Toying with Mulan's good hand, stroking it and fidgeting with it, Aurora took a moment to figure out her response.

"I… I had a few dreams about being in the facility, yes." Aurora said. "I saw you sometimes, Ruby. Nothing… concrete. Just vague… vague snapshots, I guess. Usually it was when…" A blush crept over Aurora as she continued to fidget with Mulan's hand, bringing it up and under her chin before looking at Mulan. "….when the two of you would interact. I saw you sneak food to Ruby. And I saw you going on a ride with your brother. I also saw you play boardgames with him."

Mulan blinked. "Aurora… what?"

"Look, it's creepy and stalky, I know." Aurora's face was very red now as she clung to Mulan's hand. "I'm sorry. I was trying to figure out how to tell you that I dreamed about you before… er…  _saw_ you before. Although that was before I knew that astral projection was a thing I could do. Before I knew that I wasn't dreaming about you but… well…  _spying_ on you, which I understand is wrong and totally a breach of your privacy."

"It's… well… knowing this is a little uncomfortable." Mulan admitted, then shrugged. "But I mean after you figured out the extent of your power, you always asked us before you linked into us and brought us to the facility, right?"

Biting her lip, Aurora nodded.

"Then yeah, sure. It's… it's fine." Mulan then looked at Emma. "Does anyone else have anything similar to share?"

"I'ready toldju 'bout peeking in your'ead right?"

"It was Belle who told me about it."

"Ah… right. Shorsry, dude."

"And you're more conscious now about asking before using your powers to peek into anyone else's thoughts, right?" Mulan looked at the triplets. "Because last night Hubert just called you out on poking into his and his brother's heads."

Emma nodded and lifted her hand. "Yesh ma'am. Being more careful'ow. Force o'habit buworking'un it."

"That's good." Mulan said. "Thank you."

"I have a question." Belle said, "Aurora, if you dreamed about… or rather,  _visited_  Mulan a few times, does that mean you had some semblance of control over where you projected? I mean assuming of course you were thinking a lot about Mulan already at that time."

Aurora was blushing again. "You could say that. I… I did have a lot of dreams or… or whatever you'd call them. Featuring the people I was attracted to when I was in high school and even when I was in college."

"Wait, I'm curious about something." Regina said, "How were you able to keep your… _Mulan-related_ dreams secret for this long? Given that several times you've linked consciousness with Mulan and Emma."

Shrugging, Aurora said, "I'm not too sure, actually. I guess my focus was so centered on getting our plan to work that there wasn't a lot of time to dwell on my guilt until now that things have slowed down? And I have a theory that Emma and I, given the range of abilities we have, have better control over filtering our thoughts when we link with other people."

Regina and Belle were both nodding and eyeing Aurora with interest.

"Have you and Mulan linked in your sleep? I'm curious." Belle said.

Aurora glanced at Mulan. "We… we haven't since getting out of the facility. Mulan would rather not and I respect that."

"Thank you." Mulan said, then after hesitating for a moment, she said, "Maybe I'll… maybe we can try in the future. I… I want to tell you something, but maybe later." She shifted uncomfortably then seemed to switch topics away from whatever she was going to say. "You've mentioned a few times how you used alcohol to help you sleep. And we all know you kept a thermos full of coffee on you when you were in the facility."

"Yes?"

"Do… do you sleep better now than you did before?"

Aurora nodded. "Yes, actually. For the first time since… since  _forever_ , I guess. I'm having real, restful sleep. I still project sometimes, but it's generally just in short bursts and I otherwise have a good sleep. Since we started the escape plan and… and everything that came after, my coffee and alcohol intake decreased, I think."

She kissed Mulan's hand before leaning into her shoulder. "Actually, what Killian said about this feeling group feeling like family is on point. My parents were quite protective but also very distant. Especially as they got busier with their jobs. I was closer to my Grannies than I was with them. But this group? You guys? I feel like I have a purpose here, you know?"

"Yeah, and that purpose isn't driving."

Aurora bolted upright. "Oh yeah, Belle? You're right. It's reaching the cereal on the top shelf at the grocery for you."

"You are practically just an  _inch_ taller than me!" Belle tossed a twig at Aurora.

Snickering, Aurora said, "An inch can make or break whether or not you're this tall to ride the rollercoaster."

Putting a hand to her chest and pretending to look deeply offended, Belle gasped, " _Aurora_!"

"Belle, mate, I think Aurora wins this one again." Killian chuckled.

Belle turned to Killian. "You're keeping track?"

"Yeah. Aurora's on two points now. You're still at zero."

Rolling her eyes, Belle said, "Fine. I'll get even eventually."

"I loves seeing you dwo do your back'n'forth'ing." Emma started reaching for Neal's bottle. He noticed and moved it to his other side. "And Aurora'n'Mulan are suuuuper cutesests ever. But y'know wha's rully nice?"

Regina sighed. "What, Emma?"

"Merida'n'Ruby bein' fffrens'gain."

Glancing at Merida, Ruby gave her a smile. Even with everything that happened, even with all the darkness and pain they carried, Merida found it in herself to forgive Ruby. It was a pure, warming, uplifting feeling and she still couldn't believe that it really happened last night.

But Merida returned the smile, proving that it really  _did_ happen.

"You could say we're friends again, yeah." Merida said.

"Do you want to talk about that, dear?" Mrs. Dunbroch asked.

Putting aside her cup, Merida nodded. "Sure. Okay." She looked at Ruby. "I… I had a talk with Ruby last night. And…"

Merida looked away. "I spent so many years hating her. I blamed her for what I was going through. What my brothers were going through."

Well Merida wasn't exactly wrong. If Ruby hadn't gone berserk in that classroom that day then maybe Merida would be living a very different life right now. Ruby could imagine Merida with her red hair flowing in the wind as she joined those archery competitions she used to enjoy so much. She would be winning left and right, maybe competing internationally.

And she would have Dorothy by her side.

"It was hard." Merida said. "Really,  _really_ hard. The moment Gold realized I could heal faster than any of his other bears, his tests got harsher and more painful. I think even the guards also got less gentle."

Mrs. Dunbroch put a hand on Merida's shoulder. "I'm sorry, dear."

Putting a hand over her mother's, Merida said, "'Salright, mum. I… I survived each hardship by hanging on to the thought of one day seeing Ruby in the facility. I knew she was in there with us and I… every day and every night, after every test, I prayed for the chance to see her and tear into her. And Gold gave me that chance."

With a shaky sigh, Merida looked up from the fire and back to Ruby. "And I almost killed you."

"I… I would have… let… you." The new scars across her face and stomach were always going to be reminders of that day and how close Merida came to succeeding.

Hugging herself and bringing her knees up to her chest, Merida continued. "Yeah… I… know."

"It was horrible, watching it happen." Belle whispered. "I… I was so scared that you'd kill her. You told me how much you wanted to."

"Yeah." Merida nodded, "I  _really_ wanted to. But… but after seeing what she'd been through. After seeing and… and realizing how much Gold destroyed Ruby as well…"

Picking up a twig, Merida tossed it into the fire. "I can see now that even if Ruby fucked up phenomenally, she… she was a victim, too. A victim of Gold's torture. A victim of the choices her family made. A victim to her own condition."

Uncomfortable with being framed in such away, Ruby looked away from Merida's piercing eyes. As much as Ruby hated herself for everything she'd done and all the lives she'd destroyed, there was a part of her that kind of agreed with Merida.

And knowing that part existed was still unnerving to Ruby and she wasn't sure if she could get used to seeing herself as more than a monster who destroyed lives.

But as Ruby looked around the circle, she realized that maybe Merida was right. And Belle. And Emma and Regina and Mulan.

Maybe Ruby had indeed suffered enough for her sins.

"I see you, Ruby." Merida said. "I see how hard you fight to control the wolf. I see how hard it is to control the wolf. Since I had to go through that, too. A lot of the tests they put me through forced me into the bear form and I was dangerous in the bear form."

Looking up, Ruby managed to meet Merida's eyes once more.

"I can understand the struggle to control it. And… and I'll be honest. It's hard. It's still really hard for me to put the past behind me." A small smile formed on Merida's face, but it felt bittersweet as sorrow still lingered behind her eyes. "But I forgive you. I stand by what I said last night. I finally understand that I can't completely blame you."

The smile faded and Merida's face hardened, her eyes looking almost red in the flicker of the firelight. "And I understand that we really need to bring Gold down after what he's done to all of us. If we need to testify or talk to lawyers…"

Merida faltered for a moment, "…even if that means turning ourselves in… facing police for the illegal things we did along the way… facing the people who fear us for what we're capable of… I…"

She straightened up, regaining her strength and putting conviction back into her words. "I'm in."

"Merida… are you sure?" Mrs. Dunbroch asked.

Merida nodded. "Yes, mum. I… I think it's for the best."

"We want in, too." Harris said, followed by nods from his brothers.

Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch exchanged glances before the latter spoke up, addressing her children. "We can talk about this more later. I think we shouldn't jump into any conclusions. I still really don't like the idea of any of you getting locked up again."

"If… if I may…" Mulan spoke up, "Within this whole party, the boys are the least likely to get locked up again. They're still minors, for one. For another, they don't have a history of hurting anyone like… well… like Merida or Ruby. And they don't have a criminal record like Emma and her partners. And I'm pretty sure CPS will fight for the boys."

"They aslo might take'em 'way frum theirs parsents." Emma said.

"I…" Mulan sighed. "It's a possibility. But… it might not be for sure. This whole breakout aside, Mr. Dunbroch has a pretty clean record. And one could argue that he was just dragged along this whole thing and that could keep him in the clear."

"I'm really not comfortable with this."

"Mum, if we don't make things right, nothing's going to change." Merida said, "What's to stop more people like Gold from putting more people like us through the same fate? We have to change that."

Mrs. Dunbroch's brow furrowed and she looked away. "I… I just don't want you to get locked up again."

"I hurt a lot of the guards in the facility that night we got out." Merida said, "I may have…" Her voice cracked, but she managed to keep going. "I may have even  _killed_ some of them."

Continuing to look uneasy and uncomfortable, Mrs. Dunbroch kept her eyes averted.

"If I'm in trouble for that, I have to own up to it." Merida's voice was steady again. "If we don't own up to what we did, why should Gold?"

Taking a moment to close her eyes and mull over her daughter's words, Mrs. Dunbroch didn't answer right away.

"Mum… please? When it's the right time to come out of hiding and talk to whoever we need to talk to, I  _am going to_."

Mrs. Dunbroch opened her eyes and turned to Merida. "Alright. I'll come forward, too." She looked to her husband. "But I would prefer you and the boys stay out of it unless absolutely necessary."

Big shoulders drooping, Mr. Dunbroch nodded. "Okay."

"I shtill don't like…" Emma hiccupped. "…don't wanna go'a cour'room 'gain."

"None of us can force you to, Emma." Regina said. "But I'm inclined to offer what I know and have seen to the investigation. And if there's a chance that my mother will finally experience having consequences for her actions, then I'm going to do what I can to increase that chance."

Emma looked away from Regina. "Okay."

"I want to monitor the investigation a bit more." Neal said, "And continue working with Regina on releasing more insider info and stuff. But I think we should give it a bit more time for more people to lean towards supporting us. When it feels like the right time for us to come forward, I'll let you all know."

"Thanks, Neal." Belle said, accompanied by nods and thanks from the rest of the group. Emma stayed quiet.

The thought of facing people she didn't know was frightening if Ruby were to be honest with herself. The thought of having to talk to strangers about what she went through was almost terrifying enough to send her running for the hills.

But Granny deserved justice. Mother needed to be caught.

And looking around this ragtag bunch she'd come to see as her new family, Ruby knew that those who suffered at Gold's hands didn't deserve to see him walk free. Merida's family suffered and her brothers lost their childhood. Regina lost her childhood. Neal lost his mother and never got the father's love he needed. And Mulan… still couldn't even use her hand.

Mulan who had been a flicker of light in the dark void of hopelessness and self-hatred Ruby lived in at the facility. Mulan who had snuck food to Ruby when the scientists tried to put her on a diet of raw meat. Mulan who had learned to help soothe Ruby through the moments when the wolf might come out. Mulan who tried to make sure the straps weren't too tight. Mulan who tried to make the shower sessions as painless as possible. Mulan who reminded Ruby that she had a name. Mulan who chose not to be like the other guards, employing compassion instead of aggression with the subjects.

"Mulan…" Ruby realized she'd broken the silence when all eyes turned to look at her. She tried not to squirm as she continued. "Just… want to s-say… thank you… again. For b-being… the nice guard."

Shrugging in response, Mulan said, "I could have done more. But I didn't."

"'Swasn't tha'simple for sh'you." Emma said. She managed to sneak a sip of Neal's bottle. Regina noticed and confiscated it.

"Well… yeah. I… I was stuck between two tough spots, I guess." Mulan frowned and shook her head. "I don't know what's the right thing to do anymore. I just know that I either have to finish what we started with Gold or…" She blinked and her voice shook. "…or never show my face to my family ever again. After what I did to them."

"What do you mean?" Belle's brow furrowed. "I thought you'd rather not leave your brother behind?"

With the attention starting to shift towards her, Mulan squirmed and ran her fingers through her dark hair. "I… I'd rather not. We've been together forever." She chuckled. "Literally since conception."

Mulan massaged her injured hand. "I miss him, yeah. We were super close and we loved boardgames. We liked Risk and Chess, but we did try some of the new games as well. Cards Against Humanity was really awkward to play with friends whenever Mom was within earshot so we didn't play that too often. But the games really helped. They helped us… kind of just forget, for a moment."

Tilting her head to one side, Ruby wondered if Mulan meant forgetting the stress of working at Baelfire, or something else.

"I… I feel terrible about the part I played, working at Baelfire." The muscles along her clenched jaw were thrown into sharp definition in the firelight. "I was part of this… this horrible place where people were treated like less than people. Where I contributed to misery and pain and I… I don't know how to forgive myself for that."

"Dude, you helped set them free." Neal said, "You fucking  _bled_ for the mission. Isn't that enough?"

Mulan shrugged. "I… I don't know. I just know that I hated the work but I couldn't leave and I couldn't change it because I needed the job. My family needed me to keep the job. My  _father_ needed me to keep the job."

"Mate, is… is your family in trouble?" Killian asked.

"You… could say that." Mulan said, "I… Emma and Aurora know about this. But I… my father is very sick. And the job at Baelfire was the biggest break we had with at least coming close to staying on top of the hospital bills. Shang had trouble getting work after we completed our training. We both did, with being Chinese and all… but… but Shang almost had a job after training until the company saw a picture of his boyfriend and they suddenly stopped replying to him. It took him another year or two to land his shitty mall cop job."

"So of the three of you- yourself, your brother and your mother, you had the highest paying job to support your father?" Regina clarified. "And that's why you were compassionate with us but not ready to actively support us?"

Mulan nodded. "Not until I figured out who Ruby was and it… I guess it humanized her for me since I was starting to…" It took a brief pause for Mulan to find the right word, "I guess I was starting to get desensitized. But connecting Subject 204 to this girl I used to see in school… it was one hell of a wakeup call for me."

"Wait…" Ruby frowned, "Did… does that…" She rubbed at her head and sorted through the words in her head. "You… you had to choose? B-between… helping us… or helping y-your… dad?"

Face tense, Mulan stared at the fire. "You could say that, yeah."

This didn't sit well with Ruby. She wasn't worth more than someone's sick father. Than  _Mulan's_ sick father.

But it wasn't just about Ruby. It was also about Emma. About Regina. About Merida and her family. The concept of choosing who should take priority was uncomfortable and Ruby couldn't imagine the turmoil Mulan went through. Or even what she might  _still_ be going through.

"Why didn't you bring it up before?" Belle asked, her voice soft, laced with guilt. "Or even during those times we were linked?"

"You all had your own burdens. I didn't want to share mine at the time. It would have distracted from the mission. Would have broken our focus." Mulan rubbed at the back of her neck and looked off to the side. "Look. My father was dying yesterday. Dying last week. Last month. Five years ago. Ten years ago. He will be dying tomorrow. He will be dying maybe even a year from now." There was a bitter tone to Mulan's words.

"But the subjects? Ruby, the Dunbrochs, Emma, Regina…" Mulan shook her head. "Gold was actively killing them  _now_. Ruby almost  _died_ during one of his sick tests. Contributing to the breakout was a more immediate priority. That's… that's what helped keep me focused."

"Shit, man." Neal sounded stunned. "I'm sorry."

"We're not turning our backs on your father or leaving him behind." Aurora said, putting a hand over Mulan's knee. "We'll figure this out. I'm with you."

Mulan shook her head. "I can't ask that of you, Aurora."

"That's why I'm  _promising_ to do it." Aurora said, her voice firm.

"We're sorry," Regina leaned forward, her eyes soft and sincere. "If it's any consolation, Neal and I were planning to get working tomorrow on looking for more ways to speed things along with getting this whole Baelfire debacle wrapped up sooner than later."

"Thanks," Mulan sounded tired and broken as she wiped at her eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to unload this on all of you. I… I know you're all dealing with worse." Her chin trembled as she continued, "I just have so much on my mind… Staying here is giving me way too much time to think and it's… it's eating me up. I'm sorry."

"Hey, hey. It's okay." Aurora pulled Mulan in for an embrace so she could bury her face into Aurora's shoulder. "We'll figure this out. I promise."

"I think I have a better hold on how to heal your hand." Regina added, "I've been studying the pdf's from Neal and I think we can make bigger progress on our next session if you want to have one tomorrow."

Mulan's reply was a soft and breathy, "…okay."

"You're norras bad ashyou think you are." Emma said, "Y'did best wish your sishwayshon."

"I don't know about that." Mulan said.

"I'm inclined to side with drunk Emma." Aurora said. "You were given a really bad set of cards and you did what you could with what you had. Nobody can fault you for that."

Mulan just shrugged. Then she eased herself off or Aurora's shoulder to be able to look her in the eye. "Aurora, there's something… something I haven't told you yet."

Careful and gentle, Aurora put a hand on Mulan's cheek. "What is it?"

"I've… I've been having nightmares." Mulan said, "Pretty much every night since we got out."

Brow creasing with worry, Aurora asked, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to trouble you." Mulan bowed her head, avoiding Aurora's eyes. "You kept saying how good it was to finally have real sleep, I didn't want to bother you and take that away from you."

"Hey," Aurora ruffled Mulan's hair, making the short strands stick out. "No more of this not wanting to bother anyone. We love you and want to make sure you're okay."

A flush of red crept over Aurora's face as she took a deep breath and said, " _I_  love you and want to make sure you're okay."

Eyes widening, Mulan straightened up. Her mouth was agape and red was also starting to creep over her face.

"Don't look at me like that,  _you_ said it first and totally caught me off guard that time too." Aurora patted Mulan's cheek. "I just wanted to find the right moment to say it back."

"Gerra room!" Emma yelled through cupped hands, only to be aggressively shushed by Regina, Killian and Neal.

"And Mulan?" Aurora's face was still flushed and there were still remnants of a grin on her face, but that started to fade into a more serious expression. "If you're willing, maybe we could link dreams? So maybe I can at least help you or be with you through the nightmares."

Hesitating, Mulan looked away from Aurora. "I'm not sure… I'm… I'm scared of what you might see. And how it might affect you."

"Mulan." Aurora was completely serious now. She put a hand under Mulan's chin and guided her into returning eye contact. "I wasn't there for you when it happened. Let me be here for you now."

Mulan pulled Aurora in for a hug. "Thank you."

"Get a-"

"Emma!" Regina's irritation was clear in the hardness of her voice and even Ruby found herself fearing for Emma. "Do you want to be sent back into the cabin?"

"Nah, if she wants to talk so much, we should let her take the floor." Killian nudged Emma, "What do you say, mate? Share maybe how much you love your big bro's, good ol' Killian and Neal?"

Putting a hand on Killian's face, Emma pushed him away. "Nuthin' goo'bout eerther of you."

"I'm pretty sure we're at least  _good-looking_." Killian winked and elbowed Merida, "Right, Merida?"

Merida shook her head, "Not my type, sorry."

Killian's smile fell. "Right… most of you here are either into girls or…" He glanced at Mrs. Dunbroch. " _…married_."

The scandalized looks on both Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch's faces was admittedly amusing, as was the way Killian shrank into himself and hid behind his beer. "I did not… that wasn't… FORGET I SAID ANYTHING."

"Too late, mate." Neal had his face in his palm. "You said it and now it's weird and Mrs. Dunbroch will never go near you ever again."

"Can we talk about something else?" Merida rubbed at her temples. "Please?"

"Well Emma's the only one who hasn't had her spotlight time yet." Aurora said, "Although I'm not sure if she's in the right state of mind to say much of  _anything_."

Leaning against Regina, Emma had bleary eyes and looked like she was falling asleep, her head bobbing down.

"Emma, do you want to go to sleep?" Regina's tone gave away her straining patience. "Because you are on the verge of passing out."

At this, Emma suddenly straightened up and raised her hand. "No, I gotsis!"

"Then proceed." Regina rolled her eyes before folding her arms across her chest. Though her neutral mask was taking shape, Ruby could still see annoyance in the hardness of her eyes and the clench and unclench of her jaw.

"Hey Reggie?" Emma rubbed at her forehead before dragging her hand down her face. "Shyou mad a'me?"

Regina shook her head, "I don't want to talk about this now, Emma."

"Look, I'll shober up." Emma reached for a cup of water and sloppily downed it, spilling about half it all over her chin and chest. "See? Hydrationing!"

"I really think you should just go to bed." Regina avoided looking at Emma.

"'Msorry!" Emma's begged, her shoulders dropping at how Regina's expression never softened.

Regina didn't say anything.

Emma's voice broke and she wiped at her eyes, "'Msorry I dishappoinsed you. Sorry 'mnot ready to tesserfy 'gainst Gold. Sorry 'm fuckin' dunk as shrit. Sorry. Sorry I'm like shis. Shorry I perfer to run away and nerver be found again. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

The neutral expression on Regina's face started to crack, but she didn't say anything and continued to look away from Emma.

"I shoulda shtopped when I gost buzzed." Emma pressed her palms to the ground and unsteadily pushed herself to her feet. She wobbled when she straightened up and Neal looked ready to catch her if she fell. "I shoulda shtopped but I juss… I haven'ad a taste o'dis shit forelever. And tha'sa shitsy escuse. 'Nother shitty ecsuse is the buzz feels good. Feels'ike being happy. I'unno. I'm shorry, Regshina."

"Emma, just sit down."

Emma wobbled again but took a step forward. Her face was red and her eyes were pink and unfocused. "'M not worsh anything. Y'all gimme credit for palning 'scape but Regina should take cerdit for sat. I's misesrsable there. Consisered starfsing self or baiting Gasson inso beating me to dearth."

"Emma, just-"

"You made it bearsable!" Emma gestured towards Regina. "You kep'me commany. You let me shee ousside world sru your eyes when I forfgot whassit looked like. You…" Her hands dropped to her sides and her shoulders drooped. "You geff me a rearson to live. To… to keep living."

She looked away from Regina, bleary eyes roaming over the group around the fire. "Now… being wis you all… being par' of this'ing… this… farmily… 'm scared o'fucking it up. I dunno how'o be part of a family. Nerver had one berfore. I'm… I'm sorry. I ruirned sa night. I'm sorry."

"Emma…" Mrs. Dunbroch was the one who stood up and approached Emma, putting a hand around her waist when she stumbled. "I think the first part about being part of a family that loves you is realizing that we'll love you even if you make mistakes."

Leaning heavily against Mrs. Dunbroch, Emma allowed herself to be led back towards the cabin.

"The second part is understanding that we want to help you avoid repeating those mistakes. And letting us help you. This is just one or two nights. That's okay for now, but we don't want to make a regular thing out of this. Okay?"

"Okay." Emma said.

"And you can talk to Regina in the morning, with clearer heads." Mrs. Dunbroch brought Emma inside. Ruby could hear them working their way up the stairs to the room Emma and Regina were sharing.

"Regina?" Belle said, "Are you… okay…?"

Regina shook her head. "It's… I'm uncomfortable seeing her in that state. I don't like it and I would have appreciated her being more respectful of that."

"That's something you're going to have to talk with her about." Aurora said.

"I know." Regina started picking up the bottles Emma had finished. Neal pitched in and eventually, everyone started cleaning up and packing up.

When they were just about done and starting to head into their rooms, Merida called Ruby's attention. "Wanna go for a run again?" Poking Ruby's ribs with an elbow, Merida added, "This time we run together? Maybe have a change of clothes ready for us at the edge of the woods?"

Although the bed sounded tempting, the call of the woods was noticeably  _more_ tempting. Ruby looked towards Belle, about to ask permission.

"Go ahead." Belle said. "You two have fun."

Ruby pounced on Belle to give her a hug before turning to go with Merida.

* * *

 

With Ruby out running with Merida again, Belle decided to camp out in the living room, maybe with another book. There were a lot of classics in the cabin she didn't mind rereading and it would keep her mind occupied until Ruby got back. The anxiety wasn't so bad this time since Belle knew that it was just a casual, supernatural run among two supernaturals.

And it wasn't the grief-ridden flight of distress as last night.

"You won't go to bed yet?" Aurora asked.

"I figured I'd wait for Ruby to get back." Belle said, rubbing the back of her neck and second-guessing herself. Was it appropriate for her to be waiting around for Ruby? Fretting about where she went?

She assured herself that the very unusual circumstances that brought Ruby and Belle together meant that some of their interactions didn't necessarily follow conventional social rules. They probably held hands more often than typical platonic friends, after all. And that was born out of a need to ease Ruby out of her tendency to self-harm.

That and they found comfort in it.

They  _both_ did. Belle had to admit to herself that she also drew strength from their handholds.

"Mind if we join you for a bit?" Aurora asked, "Unless you wanted to be alone with your thoughts?"

Gesturing towards the couch opposite her, Belle said, "Nah, go ahead. It would be nice to sit with you two again." With a smirk, she added, "The three of us sitting together is kind of where it all started, after all."

Mulan and Aurora sat down on the couch while the latter said, "Yeah, it does feel like old times. The first time the three of us sat together, you were high on sleep deprivation and Mulan spent the night searching for her high school yearbook."

"Yeah…" Mulan said, "It feels kind of strange… thinking of that as old times when it wasn't that long ago. It was what? A few weeks ago?"

"Roughly two months, I think." Belle answered, recalling that she'd witnessed Ruby on a full moon twice. Leaning back on the couch, Belle sighed. "It feels like longer."

"I does." Aurora agreed. "Sometimes I'm still can't believe it all really happened. Me discovering my abilities. Practicing with you guys and with Emma. Finding Neal and Killian. This whole escape plan debacle."

The awed tone shifted into a more melancholic one as Aurora continued, "Being on the run… being on the news as a criminal… having no idea how my parents feel about me now…"

Mulan patted Aurora's knee, dark eyes reflecting the same sadness. "Yeah… I really hope we can see them again… I need to explain myself to my family… they deserve that much."

A door opened and closed somewhere upstairs, followed by footsteps coming down until Regina came into view. She looked drained but put in the effort to straighten up and greet them with a polite smile. "Good evening."

"At this point I think it's neither morning nor evening." Belle said. "Ariel and I used to call it  _mornight_ when we would pull all-nighters working on our thesis papers."

"Were you heading to the kitchen?" Ariel asked.

The air of control and politeness wavered as Regina shook her head and rubbed at her arm. "I… I didn't feel like sleeping just yet."

"Do you want to sit with us for a bit?" Belle shifted so there was room for Regina to join them.

She hesitated for a moment before eventually shrugging and coming over to sit next to Belle. "Thanks."

"How's Emma?" Mulan asked.

"Asleep." Regina answered. She straightened her back and ran a hand through her hair, adjusting it. "Which is probably for the best. Mrs. Dunbroch said she threw up but at least it was in the bathroom and there was no mess."

"Do you want to talk about Emma?" Aurora offered.

Regina stiffened, the neutral expression giving way to irritation. "What's there to talk about? What  _business_ is it of yours?" A defensive tone came as her reply. She glared at Aurora, almost challenging her to say something else, just for the sake of maintaining an aggressive conversation.

"Hey, she was just asking." Mulan was leaning forward, meeting Regina's eyes. "It's not  _us_ you're mad at and you know that."

For several tense seconds, Regina and Mulan glowered at each other and Belle wasn't sure if she wanted to shrink into her seat or come between them. It had already been a long night and even if the buzz of alcohol was wearing off, Belle doubted she had the level of tact and perception needed to mediate a budding argument.

But thankfully, Regina broke the eye contact and leaned back against the couch. "You're right. I apologize."

"Apology accepted." Aurora said, putting a hand over Mulan's, easing her back into a more relaxed position as well. "I'm sorry for overstepping."

"It's fine." Regina leaned her head back and pinched the bridge of her nose. She sighed. "This just isn't how I hoped the evening would end. I hoped she would notice my discomfort much sooner. Not… not make a scene like that."

"Emma has issues she needs to address." Belle said, trying to choose her words carefully to avoid agitating Regina again. It felt like walking on eggshells. "And how she handled it tonight probably wasn't the best way to go about it. But I think the best we can all do is just move forward from here. There's still a lot of time for the two of you to talk things out."

Tight-lipped, Regina just nodded.

"You two are such a tightly knit pair." Aurora said, "You'll get through this rough patch just fine. We're all still just trying to make sense of this complete 180 in our lives."

"Aurora's right." Belle said, "And being here is giving us all more time to think and dwell on things that we normally wouldn't. So it's understandable that some very heightened emotions or troubling memories are coming to the surface."

Speaking from experience, Belle found herself dwelling on thoughts of her parents, particularly her mother, a lot more often than ever before. There was something about being in a cabin with little to do that put her in a reflective mood and she had a feeling she wasn't the only one experiencing it.

"I just hope this doesn't become a regular problem." Regina was sitting with her back straight once more, tense hands clasped tightly together. "Because I don't think I can handle that."

"Emma loves you too much let it become a full-blown problem." Aurora said. "We felt that when we linked together, we see how she's all over you. Even tonight, drunk out of her mind, the moment she realized that you weren't okay, she was very apologetic."

"I suppose." Regina said. She sighed and leaned forward leaning on her knees. "We've been through too much together and we care for each other too much for this to break us, you're right. I'll talk to her when she's sober and I… I'm sure we'll come to an understanding. She knows how I feel about…  _this_."

It was a relief to see Regina starting to soften. Hopefully she wasn't going to start lashing out again.

"Yeah, I think it'll work out fine when you two get to talk." Aurora said.

Regina nodded. "Yes."

Even if the defensive look to her body language had softened, Belle could see that Regina hadn't quite relaxed yet and the attention on her was probably making her uncomfortable.

"What about you two?" Belle directed the conversation towards Aurora and Mulan. "I thought you were planning to share dreams tonight. Or did you not feel like doing that yet?"

They exchanged glances before Mulan turned to Belle and answered, "I'm not quite ready to go to bed and face the nightmares just yet."

"And we figured we'd keep you company for a bit." Aurora added. Then she shifted in her seat and bit her lip. "Also I wanted to ask you something I've been super curious about."

Belle raised an eyebrow. "This isn't another jab at my height, is it?"

Rolling her eyes, Aurora said, "Well if you want it to be, I could come up with something."

"What, like if I'm short enough to make do with taking my baths in the sink?"

That got a laugh out of Aurora. "I wouldn't even have thought of that." Snickering, she took a moment to compose herself. "I was going more for something like can you reach Ruby for kisses even if you're on your tiptoes or do you need a ladder."

Belle felt her eyes widen while heat rushed up to her cheeks. " _What_?"

"Aurora,  _no_!" Even Mulan looked scandalized.

"What?" Aurora looked from Belle to Mulan and back. "Weren't they a thing?"

Feeling very conscious of how red she now was, Belle fidgeted with her hands before flattening them down against her knees. "What… what gave you that idea?"

Aurora looked uncomfortable now, her own face starting to flush. "I… I just… I assumed. You two seemed really close."

"To be fair, Emma and I kind of assumed, too." Regina said.

"Oh… so it wasn't just me then." Mulan said.

"I… Well… we're not…  _officially…_ we're not…" Belle pressed a hand to her cheek while her fingertips rubbed her temples. "I don't know…? I mean… well we're  _friends_." She felt like she was in high school all over again, with her friends pressing their faces really close, smirking and waiting for the juicy details about a new crush.

But  _was_ that the case?

Did Belle have a bit of a crush on Ruby?

It felt so juvenile to think that though. Juvenile to blush and squirm and be jealous of Merida. It was dumb and Belle would have preferred to have this conversation without the effects of sleep deprivation and leftover alcohol.

"So like are you  _completely_ platonic or is there like… something going on there?" Aurora asked.

"I…" The initial inclination was to say it was a completely platonic relationship, but then Belle thought about her ridiculous envy of Merida. "I don't know. Does it count that I…" She bit her lip and ran her fingers through her hair, almost forgetting how much shorter it was now as it ended just along her shoulders. "Does it count that I feel a little bit jealous of Merida?"

Mulan, Aurora and Regina all stared at Belle with widening eyes and rising eyebrows.

"That's interesting." Aurora said.

"No, it's not." Belle shifted to lean forward. She suddenly felt lightheaded and giddy talking about it, but she brought herself back to earth. "Being jealous of Merida is wrong. Ruby should have friends other than myself. And it's great that she has this developing bond with Merida. It's a really big step for both of them. And I don't think anyone can understand Ruby better than Merida can, given the parallels in both their experiences and their abilities."

"You're just praying that said bond remains platonic." Regina was smirking and Belle wanted to hide behind the couch.

"I… maybe?" Belle did her best to regain her composure even if her stomach was doing a bunch of odd twists and flips. "Look. I feel… I feel good.  _Grounded_. When we're close to each other. And I'm almost certain she feels that too. But as for pursuing anything romantic with her…"

Something in Belle sank as she continued, "…it wouldn't quite feel right to pursue a romantic  _anything_ with her while she's still so dependent. Regardless of what I feel for her, regardless of whatever these feelings are that I don't understand just yet… I…" She felt a strange sense of sadness blanket her at the thought of sticking to her principles and waiting things out with Ruby.

Belle had to reassure herself that it was the right thing to do. "I can't in good conscience take advantage of her dependence like that. I can't in good conscience enter into a relationship with her. Not one of that nature anyway. Ruby needs to learn to stand on her own first."

The silence that greeted her was uncomfortable and Belle found herself filling it with more reasons and explanations. "It just wouldn't be right, right? I mean there's such a clear power imbalance as it is and I just… it wouldn't be fair to her. I mean eventually… eventually, when she learns to stand on her own, maybe I'll do something bold like…"

Another blush took over Belle's cheeks while her hands felt cold as she rubbed them against her knees. "…like confess feelings for her or whatever."

"What if it takes a lifetime for Ruby to learn how to stand on her own again?" Mulan asked, her tone soft but serious. "Gold really did a number on her."

The thought of it taking a lifetime for Ruby to learn to stand on her own brought up conflicted, bittersweet feelings. It wasn't that Belle wanted to rush Ruby's progress or push her further than she was ready, faster than she was ready. Any small step she made towards healing was a step that Belle was willing to celebrate.

But selfishly, Belle felt hurt at the thought of never entering into anything more than platonic with Ruby.

And that just wasn't right.

Ruby came first.

Her healing was the priority here. Not Belle's feelings.

"No matter what it takes," Belle said, surprised to find conviction in her own voice. "No matter how long it takes, I'll stand by Ruby's side and help her heal and learn. I won't stop until she does heal. Even if that takes forever."

But hopefully…  _hopefully_ , it wouldn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my original plan was to wrap this up with a timeskip chapter and then an epilogue chapter, but I don't have a solid outline just yet so I have to figure it out first since there are still quite a few ribbons hanging too loosely. I can't promise to finish the next chapter in a week, since I want to get this to work out satisfyingly. But yeah. I'd really really love to hear your thoughts. What you're expecting, what you're hoping to see, whose confession broke you the most, whatever is on your mind. And lol feel free to bug me on tumblr at [stefi-delly](stefidelly.com) or [wolfdogonthemoon](wolfdogonthemoon.tumblr.com) awyea


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... um... it has been a very VERY long time since my last update and I'm like... insanely sorry for the long wait. If anyone wants to know what happened... I had a lot of things going on.
> 
> October, I went to visit my lady. November, I tried to write a novel (based on my comic which was loosely inspired by RedBeauty). December I scrapped that idea and proceeded to developing a new comic about secret agent steampunk animals. (Think Kingsman + Zootopia + Brooklyn Nine Nine + steampunk)
> 
> January I went to visit my lady again for our anniversary. January to February was full production mode for my comic. If you're interested, hit me up and I'll tell you more about it but yeah.
> 
> March... was not great. I... got dumped. And that was pretty hard. Preparing for my comic's launch helped me cope and keep busy, but it's been rough at times. We didn't end on a bad note per say. It just... wasn't working out for us and our lives seemed to be going opposite directions. So... yeah. Lol it sucked but it is what it is.
> 
> So yeah. Those are my reasons/excuses for leaving y'all hanging for months and I'm so sorry. On the bright side, I'm hoping to finish the epilogue this April and give y'all some closure. So consider this the "last" chapter but expect an epilogue in a week or two.

The grass tickled her paws and leaves scratched at her pelt but it couldn't bring her down. Nothing could compete with the wind caressing her face and the moon lighting her path. Her muscles were warm against the cooling night air and her breath came out in puffs as she slowed to a stop by the river, where the bears were playing and splashing.

Amber eyes gleamed upon catching sight of her. Merida, standing out from the rest of her family with her glowing eyes and significantly bigger frame, came bounding over with a playful growl.

With a challenging bark, Ruby dodged out of a swipe from the bear's massive paws before nipping at her back leg. Merida huffed and swiped again, this time catching Ruby under the chin.

Stunned, Ruby staggered back before shaking herself off. Merida took advantage of the distraction and grabbed Ruby in a literal bear hug before jumping into the river.

Ruby spluttered and flailed her way out of Merida's grasp and scrambled just out of reach.

Until a blur of fur knocked her back into the water as the triplets joined in the roughhousing.

* * *

"I still can't believe they finally arrested Gold." Belle sipped at hot chocolate prepared by Aurora.

From her spot next to Mulan on the bench, Aurora said, "I'm glad his license was revoked."

"I just wonder how long it will take before they brush this all under the rug." Mulan rubbed at the hair at the back of her head, where the dark strands were starting to grow out after Aurora had cut it in their undercover attempt. Belle still found it wild how they'd been living in this cabin for a good two months now.

"With how insane media has been about Baelfire, I somehow doubt it'll all be forgotten just like that." Aurora put a hand over Mulan's. "Have some faith."

Mulan shrugged. "It wouldn't be the first time the world let some esteemed person walk free from crimes that deserved the harshest jail time. Hopper was cleared of his charges after all."

"Neal said that was because Hopper gave the police a lot of information and promised to testify against Gold." Belle could still feel the lingering mix of emotions that passed through her as she and the rest of the household watched the news reports and updates Neal had compiled. "Besides, Whale is also under investigation now too. That's good news, right?"

Shrugging again, Mulan looked out towards the woods. "I guess we'll just have to wait and see how the investigation pans out." Pausing to swallow visibly, she continued, "And how the court cases play out."

"Try to get your mind off of it for now, please." Aurora shifted closer to Mulan, leaning against her shoulder. "Let's just relax tonight, okay? We have a big day tomorrow, when Regina and Emma get back from their camping escapade."

Belle nodded. "Let's try to look forward to that."

Even if Emma had insisted on avoiding a fuss, Regina made the convincing offer of going on a camping trip, just the two of them. Ruby and the Dunbrochs agreed they would avoid the trail Emma and Regina would be hiking to give them privacy.

Emma initially hadn't been sold on the idea of hiking and camping (without any alcohol) but after Regina whispered  _additional offers_ , the plans were made.

What Emma didn't know was that Regina also made arrangements with Belle and Mrs. Dunbroch. Arrangements which would be finalized tomorrow.

"Tomorrow should be fun." Mulan finally said. "It's just hard to think of anything else after we've been getting all these updates from Neal."

"Which is one of the reasons why Regina decided to take Emma out for a bit of an escape." Aurora clasped Mulan's scarred hand. "Would you want to do that too sometime?"

That seemed to get Mulan's interest. "That's an idea."

"You should do it." Belle leaned over towards them. "You've been getting tense lately. Maybe the escape could do you some good."

"I can't help but worry. The media started out with insisting I kidnapped Aurora and you, didn't it?" Any last trace of calm was leaving Mulan as she pulled her hand from Aurora's grasp and stood up to pace the porch. "How long before that inherent bias starts coming up again?"

She stopped pacing and roughly ran her hands through her hair, back and forth until it stood out in spikes. The sight would have almost been comical were it not for the seriousness of the conversation.

"I know I said that we should ride out the legal route and I know I was one of the first people to say we should testify but…" Mulan sniffed. "I'm also scared of being sent to prison because they got a damn good lawyer better than ours. Because the world does  _not_ like people who are different than they are."

Folding her arms across her chest, Mulan said, "And of course there's the threat of being shot on sight, the moment we resurface."

"Mulan…" Aurora tried to reach for Mulan, but she moved away.

"Those are valid points." Belle stood up but kept herself from stepping towards Mulan since she clearly wanted space right now. "And the threat of those things happening could be very real."

Aurora threw Belle a look of horror, but she ignored it. The last thing Mulan needed right now were for her fears to be trivialized or downplayed. There was merit in them even if they were currently overwhelming her.

"But we have to take that chance." Belle continued, "If we keep hiding or if we run away from all of this, then that would mean letting them win. You're the one who said that our testimonies could be the key to putting them away."

Mulan didn't answer.

"And you're right. It could all go wrong and blow up in our faces." Belle said, "But we have to try. If we don't try, there's  _no_  chance of us succeeding. If we do try, then there's at least a  _bit_  of a chance."

In a choked, quiet voice, Mulan finally spoke. "Right." She cleared her throat. "My father didn't raise a coward. Nothing good will come of running away or continuing to hide."

"Exactly." Belle said.

Mulan returned to her spot on the bench, this time allowing Aurora's embrace.

In an awkward attempt to switch topics, Aurora said, "How's your hand tonight?"

"Better."

"You did beat Killian at arm wrestling today." Belle sat back down and leaned back on her own chair. "That's big progress, isn't it?"

"It is."

"Besides going on a camping trip together, what would you want to do in the future?" Aurora asked, still obviously trying to direct Mulan's thoughts away from worry and fear. "We had plans for a roadtrip, right?"

Mulan nodded.

"Actually, I'd like us to this every month or so." Belle joined in with her own thoughts of what a future after all of this might look like. "When everything's over, it would be nice to still meet every full moon or so. Let Ruby and the Dunbrochs run and play in the moonlight while we have hot chocolate on the porch."

"I'd like that." Aurora said, "We could also still have picnics around the campfire. Just talking and hanging out."

" _Disneyland_." Mulan said, "That's where I'd want us to all go." With a smile finally creeping up her lips, she added, "I kind of want to know if Emma's more of a roller coaster person or a Ferris wheel person."

"I see her as the type to refuse a roller coaster unless she gets to sit next to Regina." Aurora then cast a sly glance at Belle, "I'm not sure if Belle would be allowed to ride since there's a height requirement."

Rolling her eyes, Belle jabbed back, "At least I can go on the bumper cars. I don't think they'd allow  _you_."

Aurora responded with an exaggerated gasp.

Mulan let out a soft chuckle at their exchange. "You two just won't let that drop, will you?"

Before she could come up with something witty to say in response, Belle thought she noticed movement in the woods. Squinting, she stood up and could just make out Ruby and the Dunbrochs making their way back to the cabin.

As they drew closer, Belle could see that they were wearing robes and they each had damp hair plastered to their foreheads- a sign that they'd been playing in the river again. It had grown to be their favorite place to mess around and bond since the Dunbrochs couldn't run like Ruby and she couldn't climb trees like they could. Splashing in the river was just about where they could meet in the middle.

When they arrived at the cabin porch, Belle embraced Ruby, ignoring the mumbled protest about getting wet.

"Did you have a good time?" Belle pulled away just enough to watch Ruby nod, a smile on her face. It was a bright smile, filling her face and reaching her eyes. There was color to her skin now and even if her cheekbones were still very pronounced, the gaunt look to them was significantly less than when they had first met. The brown flop of hair on her head was longer now too. Aurora had done her best to shape it into a pixiecut as it grew out and it had a personality to it that Belle liked.

"Had a very good time." Ruby rubbed at her head, spiking up her hair and sending droplets of water flying. "Ran in the woods, felt connected to the moon- in a good way!"

As they made their way to their respective rooms, Ruby rambled about the way they played in the water and how the triplets ganged up on her but when she started running around them they didn't have the speed and agility to keep up with her.

"Merida tackled me… a few times. I tried to pounce on her but she's too solid. But when I ran around them, they were no match… for me. It was fun. Seeing them try to catch me. They still caught me a few times. But I didn't mind. It was great!"

There was still a clipped, broken pattern to her speech, but it was a major improvement from before. She paused less and was more confident with her words. Her voice still had a tendency to get gravelly and she still had to pause once in a while, but she was on the right track.

Belle couldn't help but think about how proud she was of Ruby for coming so far.

"What?" Ruby raised an eyebrow as they settled down in bed.

"It's nice to see you doing better." Belle said.

Ruby smiled back. "I  _do_  feel better. Better every day."

Feeling a rush of emotion, Belle touched Ruby's hand under the blanket. "I'm proud of you. I really am."

Swallowing and looking away, Ruby's smile took on a more sheepish look. "Still struggle with words sometimes. Still have nightmares sometimes."

"You're still making progress." Belle squeezed Ruby's hand. "A few steps back are to be expected, but I still think it's worth celebrating how well you did for this full moon."

"Yeah…" The smile faded from Ruby's face and her brow furrowed.

Shifting closer to Ruby, Belle asked, "What's on your mind?"

"I… I guess I'm… scared?" Ruby kept her eyes down, refusing to meet Belle's. "Scared of you leaving when I'm… better."

"What?" Belle frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You wanted to help me get better, right?" Ruby finally looked up, eyes shiny. "Will you go away when I'm better?"

Belle huffed, "You're not getting rid of me that easily! I still want to be part of your life after everything we've been through."

A look of shock registered in Ruby's face as her eyebrows shot up. "Really?"

Smiling, Belle said, "Of course. We're still going to be friends after this, aren't we? Friends stick around for each other."

Though the words came out with conviction, there was that same stupid part of Belle that still twinged just a little bit at settling for the friends label. The rational part of Belle's mind bottled up the feeling.

Until it started flaring up as Ruby inched closer.

For one wild moment, Belle focused on Ruby's lips.

Until she nestled her cheek against Belle's shoulder. "Thank you… for reassuring me. I'd like to stay friends. Always."

What the actual heck.

Belle could still feel her heart pounding after that wild moment of completely irrational thought.

After more than two months of caring for Ruby since the breakout, Belle should be used to the touchiness between them by now, so why did stupid moments of expecting more still run through her head? Especially after she  _swore_  to keep things platonic as long as Ruby was still recovering.

And still, Belle's heart pounded far too rapidly and her stomach twisted with a stupid sense of giddiness.

Ever since sort of admitting more-than-platonic feelings for Ruby to Regina, Aurora and Mulan, ridiculous bursts of emotions like these had gotten far too common for comfort.

It didn't help that Ruby could probably hear Belle's accelerated heartbeat.

Was she going to ask about it? Or was she fast asleep now and not really noticing it while Belle stewed in a swarm of overthinking?

 _Fuck_.

* * *

"Ruby, what's next?"

The cookbook in front of her, Ruby licked her lips and worked her way through the words, taking care not to rush herself. Panicking tended to be when she fumbled the most.

"Pour bat… batter evenly…" Pointing at the book and tracing the letters with her finger helped her stay on track. "Bet… between the two pans. Bake on… middle rack of… of… oven for about…"

Ruby squinted.

"Take your time, dear." Mrs. Dunbroch's voice was as soft and gentle as the hand she put on Ruby's shoulder. "How many minutes?"

Mrs. Dunbroch's patience, as well as the encouraging faces of Belle and Merida helped keep any traces of panic from overwhelming Ruby.

"Three… five…" Ruby frowned, knowing that wasn't right.

She tried again.

"Thirty… five. Thirty-five minutes."

"There we go." Mrs. Dunbroch beamed and squeezed Ruby's shoulder. "Would you like to be the one to pour one of the batters?"

Ruby found herself back in her old kitchen, looking up at Granny. She wasn't stressed and the wrinkles on her face were less defined as a soft smile filled her face. It was only in these shared moments of baking with her granddaughter that she truly felt at peace. Only in these moments where they could just be humans making a snack. Rewarding themselves with a little treat and escaping from the burdens of their daily struggles.

Her apron had some newly spilled batter to add to the collection of stains and Ruby felt bad about the part she played in spilling some of the batter.

And yet, Granny was still willing to let her pour.

She knew how much being helpful meant to Ruby.

But did she know how much these moments of bonding meant? How baking with Granny was the only time that Ruby felt like she had a home. Like she had a family. Like she was  _loved_.

"Ruby?"

Blinking, Ruby felt jolted back to the cabin, where Mrs. Dunbroch was still waiting for an answer.

"Y-yeah." Ruby felt a twinge of ache in her heart. This wasn't the same and it never would be. Granny was gone and they were never going to bake together again. "Yeah, I wanna do it."

But there was some consolation to still be found in the kitchen. Continuing to bake and cook with people she loved could be a way for Ruby to honor Granny's memory.

"Merida, your turn to read." Mrs. Dunbroch gestured for Merida to leave the mixing bowl and take Ruby's place by the cook book.

As Merida hesitantly made her way over to read the recipe, Ruby gave what she hoped was an encouraging smile. The expression Merida returned looked tense, but her reluctance wasn't enough to stop her as she took Ruby's spot and began to read the rest of the recipe.

Meanwhile, Ruby set to work pouring the batter. As she did, she couldn't help but notice how her hands were more steady now. She felt like she was in better control over delicate tasks and she also felt happy with herself for successfully reading the recipe.

All of this though was reminding Ruby of Granny.

The way they would tell each other stories, sometimes sing silly tunes while they went about their work. The way Granny would always let Ruby lick up the spoons and mixing equipment. The way Granny's smile would always be at its widest when they were working together on a new recipe. The way Granny made home actually feel like  _home_.

"You alright, Ruby?"

Looking up from the batter to see Belle's look of concern, Ruby shrugged and returned her attention to pouring the last of the mix. "Just remembering stuff." She put the pans into the oven. "Remembering when I used to bake with Granny."

"In a good way or a bad way?"

Ruby frowned, mulling over the question.

The memories did give off pangs of regret and pain. They reminded her of a time that was never going to come back. Of a bond that could no longer be rebuilt. Of a person who was long gone. Killed like an animal- unloved and forgotten.

And yet, there was still something warming about the nostalgia. About how she could still preserve Granny's memory by getting back into the hobby of experimenting in the kitchen.

"Mostly a good way." Ruby finally answered, managing a smile.

There was still tension to Belle after last night, and Ruby could still remember the erratic heartbeat that followed their conversation before sleeping. It was hard to figure out what it meant and neither of them brought it up.

Still, Ruby was worried. She wanted to make sure that there wasn't any rift growing between them as a result of any awkwardness. There was definitely still a part of Ruby that wanted to talk about the feelings she was developing for Belle. Feelings that were similar to what Ruby had once felt for Peter and for Dorothy.

But that could go horribly wrong and drive Belle away, which was the last thing Ruby wanted to do.

On top of that, Ruby still didn't feel confident with talking about her feelings in general. In the past few weeks, she had avoided talking about the facility unless someone else brought it up. Usually Neal when he gave updates on the investigations and the legal issues. They did have another campfire get-together a few more times, though talk started to shift more towards what they wanted to do after this or where things were progressing with Gold and the facility.

Sometimes the Dunbrochs would still talk about their experiences, and Mrs. Dunbroch always struggled to maintain her composure when faced with the struggles her husband and her children had to go through.

Regina didn't open up about her childhood very much, but she and Neal compared notes a few more times. Emma had another incident involving getting drunk out of her mind, falling over and then crying about how this was the only family she'd ever known and she couldn't bear to lose them. They helped Regina settle her down and put her to bed.

In general though, Regina's talk with Emma seemed to keep her more aware of how much she consumed. That and Mrs. Dunbroch told Killian to slow down on buying alcohol. She didn't like the idea of stocking a lot in the cabin.

"Ruby?"

Startled out of her train of thought, Ruby looked at Merida.

"Wanna go out for a walk after this?"

Nodding, Ruby said, "Sure."

Maybe she could ask Merida what she thought about the increasing nervousness Belle had been displaying lately.

* * *

"Yes, we'll meet you by the roadside on Sunday." Neal had converted a corner of the study into his own office- laptop before him, several monitors around him. "Yes, we'll be ready for you. But you'll probably meet with just a few of us first. Then if the others are willing, they might join like towards the end of the meeting."

Belle couldn't hear the voice coming from Neal's headset, but he turned to her, covered the mic and gestured towards the laptop. "You'll be part of the first meeting, right?"

"Yes."

Neal nodded and returned his attention to the lawyer on the other end of the line. "Mrs. Romanova… Sorry, Anya." Throwing a wink towards Belle, Neal mouthed 'she's cute', earning an eye-roll and a swat on the shoulder.

Stifling his chuckles, Neal returned to his more professional tone. "Yeah, on Sunday, you'll be talking to me, Belle and the Dunbroch parents. Possibly Mulan and Aurora but I have to doublecheck that first."

He paused.

"Right. Sounds good. Lemme know if you have any more updates. Thanks. Bye." Upon ending the call, Neal removed his headset and turned to Belle. "So the meeting's all set. She'll be meeting me and Killian by the road on Sunday morning and she's willing to be searched and blindfolded before we take her here as long as we allow her to bring her husband and another companion."

"And her husband and that companion are…" Belle bit her lip as she sought a more tactful way to put it. "…trustworthy?"

With a smirk, Neal waved a hand at his setup and the screens shifted to show pictures of Anastasia Romanova, the lawyer they were in contact with, as well as two other people- a man with a hooked nose and a woman with stunning green eyes.

"Dimitri Romanova, chill dude who took his lady's name, had a bit of a sketchy past. Was into some low-level cons as a kid, a lot like me, Emma and Killian. Eventually shaped up and now hosts acting workshops and runs a casting company. Met Anya as a kid, bonded over immigration, I guess? And probably over how they're both hot as hell."

"Probably more over trying to find a place to fit in." Belle folded her arms across her chest. "Moving here was tough on me at first, too."

"Did you resent your Dad for it?"

Belle shrugged. "Of course I was frustrated at first, leaving behind everything I knew. But I can't regret it, given how things have turned out."

"You don't regret ending up in a cabin in the woods with a bunch of supernaturals?"

Rolling her eyes, Belle was on the verge of retorting that it wasn't what she meant, but she found herself faltering.

If she thought about things hard enough, she couldn't deny that there was a part of her that was thankful for how things had turned out. Thankful to have known Ruby and Regina and Emma. Thankful to have worked side by side with the likes of Killian, Neal, Mulan and Aurora. Thankful to have had naïve eyes opened to the grim reality of the life of a subject kept in a research facility like Baelfire. Thankful to have ended up here instead of under Gold's thumb as another one of his loyal followers.

"I…" Belle's brow furrowed. "I don't regret that, actually."

At this, Neal seemed to be taken aback. He looked down at his hands, fidgeting with them. "I guess… I guess this is better than whatever crash and burn Killian and I were probably working ourselves towards."

Belle nodded.

Clearing his throat, Neal gestured towards his screens. "Dimitri seems to be on our side since he actually worked with an org and put together a fundraiser. They had like a little festival, with some improv workshops, booths and speakers and everything… all of it focused on supernaturals and how we should be treated like humans."

There was something about Dimitri and the smirk in most of his pictures that gave Belle the impression that he had that cocky kind of personality, possibly along the lines of Emma and Killian. But the fact that he was married to a lawyer willingly working with them, and the fact that he was so involved meant that he somehow  _understood_.

That he wasn't swayed by the sectors of media trying to convince the world that the supernaturals were dangerous. That he was willing to use the tools he had and the skills he had to fight alongside them and show the world that Ruby, Aurora, Emma, Regina, the Dunbrochs, Neal… that they were all just human… that they just wanted to live their lives peacefully without being inspected and studied and experimented on.

He was on their side.

"What about the woman?" Belle finally remembered to speak.

Neal cleared his throat. "She's… Actually, the fundraiser is where she comes in." He showed a picture of the Romanova couple next to the woman. "Esmerelda Djali, seems to be good friends with Anya and Dimitri and a social justice activist. She organized the fundraiser with Dimitri and put together a group that's willing to stand with us and fight for us and…"

The steadiness in Neal's voice broke and he had to take a moment to clear his throat and take a breath.

"…that's… it's just really fucking touching and humbling and just…" Neal forced out an awkward laugh to ease himself. Clearing his throat again, he shook his head and looked away from Belle. "Shit, man…"

Belle put a hand on Neal's shoulder. "It's good to know we're not alone in this."

And he was right. It was touching and humbling to know how determined people were to help them. It was different when they were hearing about it on the news, but with an actual face to the name, with actual plans to meet people now…

It was breathtaking.

And Belle felt unsteady on her feet, just thinking about it.

"Belle…" Neal's voice was a shaky whisper as he looked towards her. "Do we really deserve all this support and shit?" He rubbed the back of his head, seeming to backtrack. "Well I mean Emma does. Definitely. For sure. And Ruby… and Regina and the Dunbrochs too."

Frowning, Belle squeezed Neal's shoulder. "What are you saying?"

The seriousness and guilt in Neal's eyes was disconcerting. Belle almost wished they could go back to just joking around and taunting each other.

"Me though? I'm a fucking con artist. I'm a thief and a hacker. I fuck up people's shit and take their money and I'm…" Neal's voice rose and he pointed at himself. "I'm exactly the kind of shithead that gives Emma and Ruby and the others a bad name!"

"Neal…"

"Would they still support me… support us? Given the shit that I've done?"

Belle moved to crouch in front of Neal and clasp his hands. "Neal, you're changing things now. What you've done now makes all the difference in the world."

Still drowning in his inner turmoil, Neal looked away.

"You're not all bad and you are  _not_  your father." Belle kept her voice firm while her grip on Neal's hand stayed soft. "There  _is_  good in you. Otherwise, Baelfire would still have its subjects to torture in the name of science."

Neal looked at Belle. "Really?"

"Really." Belle said. "That good in you is why we're all here now. That good in you is why Ruby and the others are finally safe. You deserve this support and solidarity. You're one of us."

Managing a smile, Neal nodded. "Thanks, Belle."

She stood up and leaned in to hug him, letting him press his face into her shoulder and wait for his breathing to settle and for the tension to ease.

"Are you up for sharing the latest updates from Mrs. Romanova?"

Pulling away from the embrace and clearing his throat once more, Neal said. "She prefers we call her Anya, actually. And yeah. There's some news."

The monitors transitioned to showing pictures of a woman who bore a striking resemblance to Ruby. The same strong jaw and long face. She wore a predatory expression that made Belle feel genuinely thankful she wasn't the person behind the camera.

"Canadian officials have Anita, Ruby's mom, in their custody." Neal's monitors then showed pictures of Baelfire and people protesting outside, accompanied by politicians at press conferences, addressing a crowd with signs, cameras and microphones. "With all the evidence about the abuses of Baelfire piling up, and all the backlash from the cover-up, a lot of our problems are starting to clear up."

"That's definitely good news."

"There's better news." The lightness to Neal's voice was back, and he was smiling again. "The charges against you, Mulan and Aurora are being waived."

An initial burst of joy bubbled through Belle, but she held it back, knowing that even if good happened to her, she wouldn't be able to relax until the victims of Baelfire were truly safe.

"Anya's preparing for me to get a community service deal if I plead guilty to my past crimes with Killian and Emma." He shrugged. "I'm willing to do that."

That was still good to hear so far.

"Emma's looking at the possibility of walking free from this and considering her sentence served."

"Okay, I feel like not-so-great news is coming up." Belle felt herself tensing up and had to remind herself to breathe.

"Ruby…" Neal shifted in his seat. "… hers is a difficult case. We can't deny what happened to those kids and there's hard evidence to back that up."

Belle knew she couldn't argue with that, but anger still fired up whenever it was brought up. "It wasn't like she was in control when that happened!"

"That's the thing though." Neal said, "That's what scares people. But since sentiments towards Ruby are starting to get pretty sympathetic since I started spreading footage of her treatment, there are good chances that the jury might be in favor of letting her walk free. Anya just thinks that there might be some minimal requirements tied to that freedom. Stuff like a monthly check-in around the full moon time."

Uncomfortable with the idea of having to deal with that, Belle knew she had to acknowledge it was a necessity given Ruby's past mistakes and her current condition. "I guess it's better to be safe and careful, yeah…"

"Yeah…"

"But I really hope that doesn't devolve into an abuse of power that'll just force Ruby back into captivity."

Neal nodded. "That was also a concern Anya had, but she promises to stick by us through the whole process of preparing paperwork that will keep that from happening."

They were putting a lot of faith in Anya and at this point there was little they could do other than hope for the best yet prepare for the worst.

* * *

There was something about the forest that always felt welcoming whenever she walked through it. Something in the air always felt cool and calming. The green of the trees and undergrowth was easy on her eyes. It felt like she had a place here where she would always be welcome, whether she pranced in on four legs or strode in on two.

And something felt familiar about sitting on a ledge, watching sunlight dapple its way through the trees. Something about it brought on thoughts of her childhood, sitting with Granny watching movies.

"Lion King." that was it.

"Huh?" Merida turned to give her a quizzical look.

Smirking at how awkward she felt but enjoying herself anyway, Ruby gestured towards the forest. "Everything… the light touches… is our… kingdom."

The expression Merida held was at first judgmental, but it crumbled into a fit of giggles. She held her stomach and shook her head. The laughter was infectious. Ruby laughed along too, remembering how many times she stood on her bed and pretended it was Pride Rock.

Even her dramatic reenactment of Mufasa, which involved sitting on the floor while clutching the side of her bed and screaming at imaginary Scar to help her.

"God, it's been so long since I last saw that movie." Merida leaned back, breathing out a sigh now that the laughter had subsided. "My brothers used to watch it with me all the time. I would be Scar of course, and they were the hyenas."

"I was the whole cast." Ruby admitted with a chuckle.

Merida's smile faded. "Been too long since we got to watch any movies, huh?"

That killed the mood really quickly. Ruby leaned forward, preferring to look at the forest instead of Merida. "Yeah."

They sat in silence for a while, Ruby uncomfortably thinking about the facility again. She still feared that this was temporary and she was going to be captured and dragged back into her room -her  _cell_ \- at any moment. Her heart still sped up at the thought of being in the collar and cuffs again, at being held down by chains again, at being shocked by prods again.

If she would have to go through all of that again, Ruby wasn't sure how she was going to survive it after finally experiencing happiness and freedom like this.

Just the thought of seeing Gold's face once more made Ruby shiver. She brought her knees back up onto the ledge and wrapped her arms around her legs.

She didn't want to hear his voice again, see his face again, see the prod in his hand again. She didn't want to feel the burn of silver again, feel the brightness of her room making it impossible to tell the passage of time. She didn't want to be forced to eat mush with her hands again. She didn't want to be chained to her bed again. She didn't want to go back. She  _couldn't_  go back.

Couldn't go back.

Going back could  _kill_  her.

Her body was trembling and she was rocking back and forth.

Gold would be angry with her for escaping. Gold would be angry. Very angry. Maybe less food for a week. Maybe harder experiments. Maybe more aggressive guards. Gold would punish her so  _severely_ for escaping. He would make her regret even  _thinking_  about it. He would use the prod and make her see how fast she can heal after each blow.

Gold would be  _so_  angry.

"Ruby." The hand on her shoulder brought her back to the forest.

Blinking, Ruby realized she was breathing heavily and digging her claws into her knees. Retracting her claws showed holes she'd cut into her jeans. Blood stained her skin and the fabric, but the wound had closed already.

"What… what do you want to do after we can finally move out of the cabin?" Merida asked, squeezing Ruby's shoulder.

Breathing out a heavy sigh as she tried to get her breathing back under her control, Ruby put her hands down on the grass and let her legs dangle off the ledge once more. Clutching the grass helped remind her that this was where she was now. A place with trees and grass- warm and welcoming. A  _sanctuary_.

"I want to get back into archery." Merida moved closer so her shoulder was touching Ruby's. It wasn't overbearing contact, and if anything, it helped ground Ruby. She leaned into Merida but didn't speak, preferring to just listen for now. "Maybe go back to Scotland. Mum and Dad were talking about the idea and I'm all for it."

Merida shook her head. "Too many terrible memories in this country."

Nodding, Ruby agreed. "Yeah."

Turning to look at Ruby, Merida gave a small smile. "Not all of them are bad, though."

The eye contact made Ruby uncomfortable. She looked away, back towards the forest.

"Hey," To shift to a lighter mood, Merida nudged Ruby. "Any luck making the moves on Belle?"

At the mention of this, Ruby felt her face heat up. Her heart was pounding again, but this time it was more of a nervous, excited energy than one full of fear.

"I… uh…" Ruby swallowed and shrugged. "Not yet. Never feels like… the right time."

"But you still fancy her, yeah?"

Ruby felt her face grow even warmer. She rubbed at the back of her neck, where her hair was starting to get thick and scruffy. "Feel like… feelings got… stronger."

Merida nudged Ruby again. "Just go for it, Rubes."

The idea of just going up to Belle and explicitly admitting romantic feelings to her was nerve-wracking. Ruby felt her knees turning into jelly and knew she wouldn't be able to stand up properly until this burst of erratic energy settled.

"Maybe not tonight since it's Emma's birthday." Merida corrected herself with a chuckle before patting Ruby's thigh. "Which, by the way, we should start heading back so we can help get the place ready before Regina and Emma get back from their camping trip."

With these jelly legs, Ruby wasn't sure if she'd manage a graceful walk back to the cabin. "Wanna race?"

Merida grinned before shoving Ruby's back to the ground and taking off. "Loser does the dishes!"

A playful growl rumbled in Ruby's throat as she scrambled to her feet and took off after Merida. The first few strides were awkward and stumbling before her legs finally remembered how to be legs.

By the time they arrived back at the cabin, they were covered in dirt and leaves from carelessly charging through the foliage. Ruby would have arrived first if Merida hadn't tripped her when they were just a few meters from leaping onto the porch.

Mrs. Dunbroch saw what happened and gave her daughter a bit of a scolding before ordering the two of them to shower.

* * *

Even if on every mental, logical level of her mind, Belle understood the connection Ruby and Merida shared, as well as Ruby's need for established friendships outside of Belle… there was still that damn twinge of jealousy whenever they came back to the cabin looking like they had a blast.

And for one moment of pure insanity, it crossed Belle's mind to wonder if Ruby and Merida ever engaged in any…  _physically intimate activity_  during their time in the woods together.

Cringing at herself in disgust, Belle focused instead on helping to setup the balloons while Neal and Killian hung the old cloth they'd vandalized to read HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMMA.

Ruby and Merida eventually came back, fresh and clean and ready to help.

With everyone pitching in, they were completely prepared by the time Ruby and the Dunbrochs announced that Emma and Regina were already walking down the path. They all took their chosen hiding spots and settled down to wait while Neal shut off the lights.

From her position, crouched close to Ruby, Belle felt conscious of the warm contact between their shoulders and thighs.

Belle's heart decided now was as good a time as any to start pounding rapidly. Accompanying the accelerated heartrate were butterflies in her stomach and warmth spreading over her cheeks and ears. Thank god for hair covering her ears, but was the blush showing on her face?

Glancing at Ruby, Belle was surprised to notice that she wasn't the only one with reddened cheeks.

Turning her head away so fast it made her head spin, Belle screwed her eyes shut. These butterflies and this blushing was absolutely juvenile and there was no room for that here. It was inappropriate! Belle had made a vow to wait for Ruby to be ready before taking any action in any romantic departments. That was the plan.

Plan?

Plan to  _what_? Court Ruby in a few years?

That certainly wasn't creepy.

Not at all.

With the way her mind was going haywire, Belle wanted nothing more than to curl up under a blanket and hide.

The calloused, scarred hand that pressed against Belle's shouldn't have been as soothing as it was. "You… okay?"

"'Fcourse!" Belle hated how the garbled words tumbled out of her mouth. She cleared her throat and shook her head. "I'm fine, I just-"

"Sssh!" Merida's hiss came from the corner. "They're getting close by!"

Belle tried to show Ruby a reassuring smile, but the concern and confusion on her face didn't leave.

Thankfully, Emma's voice coming from the other side of the door meant they could stop acknowledging the awkwardness hanging in the air.

"This was great, Reggie." Emma's boots thudded their way across the porch. "Nice and chill, exactly what I was hoping for." The doorknob started to turn. "Nothing fancy, no fuss or-"

The lights came on and the group yelled " _SURPRISE_!" Followed by a very off-key rendition of  _Happy Birthday_  by a very uncoordinated choir, majority of which seemed to be tone-deaf.

Taken aback and thoroughly flustered, Emma fidgeted with the straps of her camping bags until Neal and Killian jostled her over to the cake on the dining table, where Mr. Dunbroch had already lit the candles. Her face was flushed and her eyes were shiny as she looked around at all the faces grinning at her and patting her on the back or (in Neal and Killian's case) ruffling her hair.

"I… Well I'm surprised, guys." She glanced at Regina. "Were you in on this?"

Regina's raised eyebrow was accompanied by a smirk. "Do you really think I wouldn't have been a major part of planning this?"

" _God_." Emma breathed out and ran her hands through her hair. "I don't know what to say. Shit. Fuck."

" _Emma_." Mrs. Dunbroch's warning tone got a sheepish smile out of Emma.

Lifting her palms up in a placating, surrendering gesture, Emma said, "Sorry ma'am. I'm just… gosh darn overwhelmed." She couldn't keep a straight face at her own filtered words, letting out a clipped laugh before continuing. "I… I'm really kind of just going blank right now, guys."

"We couldn't let our baby sister get away with not celebrating her birthday with one hell of a  _bang_." Neal wrapped an arm about Emma's neck. "Now go and make a wish and blow out your candles, Emms."

"I just…" Emma shook her head. She breathed out again and put her palms on the table to steady herself. "Wow. Just  _wow_."

"We wanted to help you feel special on such a special day." Mrs. Dunbroch said. "Ruby, Merida, Belle and I worked together on the cake, Killian got the supplies, Neal and Regina did majority of the planning and tasking, Fergus, Mulan and the boys grilled some steaks, Aurora planned the decorations and we… we all just wanted to pitch in and celebrate."

"God." Emma cleared her throat, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. "Okay. I… Thanks. Thanks a lot, everyone. I was not expecting anything like this. I didn't want any fuss and I just… I'm kind of glad you all did this coz I feel really fucking special right now and I don't know shit about handling this feeling."

She blew out the candles before turning to look at them all, eyes wet, chin trembling. "I'm really thankful as hell to have this weird as hell new family of werebears, a werewolf, some psychics and…" She glanced at Killian and Belle. "…and miscellaneous weirdos."

"Wait,  _what_?" Miscellaneous weirdos?  _Really_?

"Love you, Belle." Emma winked.

Belle rolled her eyes.

"CAKE TIME!" Killian swiped his finger through the icing and wiped it across Emma's face.

"Dude!" Retaliating, Emma did the same. The triplets took the liberty of joining in and started to put icing all over each other as well.

Mrs. Dunbroch confiscated the cake and pulled it out of reach before the playfulness could devolve any further. "I will distribute cake slices  _after_ dinner has been eaten."

The events that followed were a blur of eating and laughing and joking around. Eventually, Neal hooked up speakers to play music and took it upon himself to be the evening's DJ. Emma was already tipsy on the limited supply of alcohol Mrs. Dunbroch allowed Killain to buy. Still, she was capable of dancing with the triplets, trading their sparse knowledge regarding the latest movies and memes.

Looking around, Belle saw Regina sitting down at the table, fiddling with her fork and a few crumbs of cake.

"You okay?"

Regina shrugged. "I'm… admittedly still worried about Emma's drinking."

Belle sat down next to Regina. "Did you get to talk to her about it?"

"She expressed that she would be more aware of it." Regina kept her eyes on the crumbs, cutting them into smaller and smaller pieces. "She at least seems to be hurdling the initial shock of finally being able to engage in alcohol and fun again. So this phase may just be temporary."

Nodding, Belle said, "It could be temporary, yes. And at least for now, I think she deserves to have a little fun."

The expression Regina held was bittersweet as she looked at Emma, laughing and flashing exaggerated moves at the triplets. "Her first birthday in the facility was rough. I… I tried to make it as painless for her as I could but… but there was only so much I could do, given the situation we were trapped in."

"She values you a lot, and I'm sure she's more than grateful to you."

"We kept each other going through some of the darkest times." Regina sighed. "This whole party was just… me trying to give her the birthday celebration I wished I could have given her when she was stuck at Baelfire."

Belle gestured towards Emma. "And look at her now. Having the time of her life, being the wild twenty-year-old she deserves to be. Being the carefree person she could never be. Being  _happy_."

"REGINA!" Emma's voice was louder than it needed to be as she called for their attention. "Get your hot ass over here and dance with me!"

Rolling her eyes but unable to hide the smile tugging at the corners of her lips, Regina stood up. "Coming, dear."

Happy to see Regina going over to join in the fun, Belle looked around the living room. The triplets were having the time of their life with Emma and Regina while Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch danced together in their own corner. They were laughing and whispering to each other and taking turns trying out moves, some of which Belle vaguely recalled seeing her father do after a little beer and music during the holidays. Aurora and Killian were dancing as well, weaving in and out of the Emma's cluster.

That was when Belle noticed Merida, Mulan and Ruby sitting on the coach, looking awkward and uncomfortable. Belle moved over to sit with them and was about to ask them how they were doing when Aurora stumbled her way to Mulan, clearly more than just tipsy by this point. "Mulan, come!"

"I-I-I don't dance." Mulan threw a helpless look in Belle's direction. "I don't really know how."

"You don't have to." Aurora took both of Mulan's hands. "Come on.  _Please_?"

"Nobody here cares if you can dance or not." Belle urged Mulan. "Just give it a try. The point is to have fun tonight, right?"

Still looking uncomfortable but not willing to disappoint Aurora, Mulan allowed herself to be pulled over to the cleared part of the living room that had been delegated as the dance floor.

"What about you two?" Belle stood up and extended her hands towards Ruby and Merida. "Why don't we join in that party?"

They looked shocked, exchanging wide-eyed looks and hesitating.

"Just a few minutes, then you can go back to the couch if you don't find it fun. How's that sound?"

After another pause, Ruby took Belle's hand. Merida, after chewing on her bottom lip, did the same. They allowed Belle to pull them to their feet.

"Let's do something that you won't have to think too much about." Belle took Merida's hands and glanced at Ruby. "Ruby, may I?"

When Ruby blushed while nodding her head, Belle guided Merida's hands to Ruby's waist, ignoring that stupid spark of jealousy that bubbled up when Merida and Ruby exchanged a look that was hard to read.

"Now Ruby, you can put your hands right here." The warmth of Ruby's palms made Belle's stomach flutter once more. She thought her heart might just jump out of her chest once Ruby's hands were in place on Belle's waist.

Unable to stop a nervous bubble of laughter, Belle managed to clear her throat and continue in a more composed voice. "Okay, so just follow my lead. Ready?"

"Ready."

"Yeah."

Shaking off the giddiness, Belle swayed her way towards the dance floor, leading her new congo line through the party and trying not to feel conscious of how silly and uncoordinated she definitely looked. The other groups parted to let their line through before joining in. Mulan and Aurora were the first to take their places at the back, followed by everyone else.

As they continued, Belle felt the discomfort ease. She relaxed into the feeling of just enjoying the night without worrying about how she looked or how she was never really one of the kids who took over the dance floor. She didn't need to be. She was among family and she was comfortable and nobody was judging anybody.

* * *

The rest of the night was full of laughter and awkward dancing before Killian had Neal change the music. He cheekily winked at the group. "This one's for the couples who never got to slow dance at prom." The beat slowed to calmer music, to a sentimental song of love.

_Heart beats fast…_

Ruby felt her own chest tighten and her own heart pick up its pace as she looked at Belle, who seemed to be just as shocked and flustered, the redness creeping over her face once more.

 _Colors and promises…  
_ _How to be brave…_

Emma, already wrapped in Regina's arms, swayed over and nudged Belle, causing her to stumble forward.

Without thinking, Ruby caught Belle, an arm about her shoulders, another around her waist. When she stiffened, Ruby felt her throat go dry and started to move her hands away.

_How can I love when I'm afraid to fall…_

But Belle relaxed into the contact as she straightened up and settled a hand on Ruby's shoulder while the other took Ruby's own hand, interlacing their fingers. The distinct difference in their palms made Ruby feel uncomfortably aware of how scarred her skin was. It was in stark contrast to Belle's smooth, soft hands.

Belle didn't seem to mind that, but she did point their linked hands in Emma's direction and raised a middle finger.

Emma, with her hand at the small of Regina's back, flashed back her own discreet middle finger.

_One... step... closer..._

Returning her attention to Ruby, Belle took the lead, working their way slowly through the dance floor, a step at a time, bodies close, hands clasped.

Flailing wildly to loud and fast music was one thing, but swaying slowly and keeping pace with Belle was another thing all together. Ruby felt uncoordinated and lost. She kept her eyes on their feet, worried about stepping on Belle's toes.

"Ruby, I know I'm short," Belle moved her hand over to Ruby's chin, guiding her into making eye contact. "But I'm pretty sure I'm not  _that_  short."

"I-I…" Ruby's eyes darted over to Emma and Regina, who seemed to be doing fine, then over to Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch, who were slowly swaying together in one corner. They knew what they were doing and Ruby wasn't. "Afraid of stepping on your feet."

"It's okay." Belle's voice was in that reassuring tone that always helped Ruby relax.

She finally met Belle's eyes, only to feel a fluttering heart, a twisting stomach and a burning face.

Nervously, Ruby looked away, glancing around the room again. Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch were embracing each other, Aurora had her head on Mulan's shoulder, Emma and Regina were cheek to cheek, seeming to have a whispered conversation.

Merida and her brothers were sitting on the sofa looking spent. Killian and Neal were sitting by the speakers, nudging each other.

"You okay?" Belle asked.

Bracing herself for another wave of giddiness, Ruby returned her attention to Belle.

 _Time stands still…  
_ _Beauty in all she is…_

"Do you want to stop?"

_I will be brave…_

Ruby shook her head. "I… I like this."

 _I will not let anything take away…  
_ _…what's standing in front of me…_

"I like doing this. I like being here." Ruby adjusted her hold on Belle's hand, now also worried about clammy palms. "I… like being here with you… I like…"

 _Every breath… every hour…  
_ _… has come to this…_

"…I like you."

Swallowing visibly, Belle was now the one looking down at their feet. Ruby could hear the pounding of both their hearts, loud and erratic, panicking to escape this situation. The heat to her face and the twisting in her stomach was growing to be too much. The room was spinning and Ruby wanted to run away, but she forced herself to stand still.

"Ruby…" Belle's eyes shone when they finally met Ruby's. "…I'm scared of messing up what's between us."

Tilting her head to one side, Ruby frowned. "What do you mean?"

"What if you just like me because I helped free you?"

_I have died everyday waiting for you…_

"Of course that's… part of it." Ruby admitted, resisting the urge to look around the room for an escape route or call for backup from Merida. "But more than that too."

_Darling don't be afraid, I have loved you… for a thousand years…_

Licking her lips, Ruby braced herself for the leap she never had the courage to take with Dorothy. "The peace on your face when you read to me. The… the way you tease Aurora. Encourage Mulan. Respect Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch."

It was Belle's turn to close her eyes and look away.

"The way you understand Regina. Get patient with Emma. Read people and help them feel good." Ruby adjusted their hands, now very sure that hers were damp and fearing Belle would recoil.

But she didn't.

"The way you're soft to who needs it and hard to who deserves it." Ruby continued, remembering the courage and anger Belle used to stand up to Gold, in contrast with the gentleness she showed towards Ruby and the other victims of the facility.

 _And all along I believed I would find you…  
_ _Time has brought your heart to me…_

"I can't deny it." Ruby found firmness in her voice as she kept going. "I can't  _not_  say it."

_I have loved you for a thousand years…_

"Belle, I feel the way I do… about you…" Ruby thought her knees would buckle when Belle finally looked up with wet eyes and an expression Ruby couldn't read. "…because you're  _you_."

_I'll love you for a thousand years…_

"Ruby, I…" Belle's voice wavered. "I have feelings for you, too."

The smile that spread over Ruby's face was one she couldn't fight back. Her heart was dancing around and her stomach was doing back flips.

"I really want to see you happy and I want to protect you from… from  _everything_. But…" Belle shook her head. Ruby frowned, not sure what direction this was going. "But I also want you heal and develop friendships and… and  _grow_."

Ruby was confused. Why did Belle not sound happy over their mutual feelings for each other?

"I'm proud of how far you've come and how you're so much stronger than you think." Belle continued, "I love how gentle and careful you are and I love how your smile fills up your whole face."

"But…?"

Something bad was going to happen, wasn't it? Ruby felt fear creeping in.

"You mean more to me than words can say." Belle said, "But I'm… I'm just really afraid of breaking whatever we have. I'm afraid neither of us are ready and I'm afraid it might just… cause everything we've built so far to just…  _crumble_."

Ruby's brow furrowed and she took a step closer to Belle. "I want to try anyway."

"Even if there's a risk?"

" _Yes_."

Belle moved even closer, leaning her head against Ruby's shoulder. Her heart fluttered at how well their bodies fit together. "Then… then  _me too_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a lot of feelings about this song and Red Beauty okay.
> 
> That aside...
> 
> With us nearing the end, I just want to thank you all for riding this out with me. Thank you for enjoying the insane update schedule I gave you last year when this first launched and sticking around when things slowed down. For staying with me through the angst and getting giddy with me through the fluff.
> 
> Y'all are great. Tune in for the epilogue, which should be coming in sooner than later, I hope.
> 
> I love y'all.


	37. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The story finally comes to a close and I hope you all enjoyed the ride.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe we've finally reached this point. We're at the end and I actually don't quite feel ready to let go. [(so lol I'm gonna be helping Leticia (ticiatigr) out with planning the prequel spinoff featuring swan queen) ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10996224/chapters/24493239)
> 
> But yeah... thanks to everyone who was here with me throughout this wild journey (also yo it was the anniversary of this fic this week so it seems fitting to wrap up tonight)

Crumpling up the tape and cotton from her bloodtest, Ruby didn't even have to look to see that the needle hadn't left a mark. They were using a model similar to what Baelfire used, with a mild silver percentage to ensure that her skin wouldn't close over before a scientist or doctor could properly make the extraction.

She leaned against the counter and waited for the results, trying resist the urge to scan the area for exits. There was no need for that. This wasn't a place that was going to lock her up. She was dressed in her jeans and jacket, not a thin hospital gown. There were no cuffs keeping her in place and no guards leering over her.

Once the tests were done, she was free to go.

And yet, her heart still thudded heavily and her skin crawled at the sight of the needles, the lab coats and the sterilized counters.

"How was the full moon?" Jane asked the customary question as she typed away into her keyboard.

"It was good." Ruby answered, keeping her voice steady. She swallowed the dread before elaborating. "Belle and I drove to the reservation, as usual. It was pretty uneventful. I turned but stayed in control. Just ran around a bit, howled a little."

Jane nodded, "That's good. Also, your tests are looking good so far. Everything's normal." She looked over the counter at Ruby. "You seem nervous though. More than usual."

To be fair, there was more on Ruby's mind than just the anxiety she got from her routine checkups pre- and post-wolfstime.

"Being here still makes me antsy." Ruby admitted, "But I get a little less uncomfortable every month, at least."

"Is there anything else bothering you?" Jane asked.

Ruby hesitated.

Jane leaned over the counter to look Ruby in the eye. "I'm assigned to monitor your status, yes. But Ruby, I'm also asking you as a friend. Are you okay?"

"Okay." There was no point in hiding it anyway. And after everything that's happened since Baelfire, Ruby trusted Jane and did consider her a friend. "It's Belle's birthday today and we're throwing this semi-private Open Mic gig. I want to make it special."

"Oh!" Jane's eyebrows shot up. "Send Belle my regards then! I'll probably send a message her way as well."

"Do you want to come?" Ruby asked. "You and Tarzan are welcome to drop by. Tiana and I agreed that we can invite friends and they can invite friends too."

Jane's wide eyes showed her surprise at the invitation, but she recovered and said, "I'll think about it and check with Tarzan. Thanks for the offer, though."

Ruby nodded. "You're welcome."

After wrapping up with the final paperwork and signing out, Ruby left the building. Though the dread of being inside was lifted once she was back out in the street, there was still tension in her chest, accompanied by burning anxious energy.

Shaking her hands and rolling her shoulders to try to ease the tension out, Ruby breathed out and told herself she could get through this. She had to focus because she and Tiana had a day of cooking and prep work ahead of them.

* * *

Leaning back against her chair, Belle stretched out her arms, sighing as her joints popped and knots in her muscles eased. She and Ruby just got back in town yesterday, after their wolfstime stay at the plot of land cleared out for her and other lycanthropes and shapeshifters. It was a fenced area with designated camping sites for those more in control and a separate, more untamed forest for those with less control but proven willingness to cooperate.

Last year, Anita Lucas was offered the option of a setup similar to house arrest. On the first chance she got, she attempted to attack her guards. Now she was back in the prison developed specifically for supernaturals. Cora Mills was there, too.

Being someone who was part of the early stages of the prison's development, Anya made it a point to have the institution inspected regularly for signs of abuse. The new president and the government in general were more open-minded now than the administration five years ago. There were still protesters of course. People afraid and angry. A good number of the parents of students Ruby killed had yet to forgive her. It still scared Belle sometimes to know Ruby jogged to and from the diner alone.

Just three years ago, Ruby was attacked. People had gotten their hands on tasers to catch her off guard and silverware to keep her down.

Belle still remembered the anger that burst through her when Ruby came home in the wee hours of the morning with fresh scars, bloody clothes and a furious Mulan radioing for officers to track down the attackers.

It wasn't the most elaborately planned attack, of course. The group was apprehended within the week. But it still scared Belle to know there were people who were willing to go far enough to attack Ruby, unprovoked. Thank God for the immense control Ruby had over her wolf side. She just curled up and took their abuse.

She was sullen for a few weeks after that. Mulan had a protective detail arranged for about a month. They also arranged for at least one security guard assigned to Granny's Diner. That finally solved the vandalism problem.

But after a month or so, Ruby insisted that Mulan stop spending officers' time on the protective detail. According to Ruby, it felt wrong. It made her feel like she was avoiding the anger people felt about her. Like she would rather hide behind guards than face the pain she caused. Mulan reluctantly agreed to focus instead on public safety.

It wasn't like Ruby was running away from people's pain. Belle was quick to point out how on their first week of officially declared freedom, Ruby reached out to all the families of the murdered students. Many refused to talk to her. A few were among the protesters insisting Ruby be kept in captivity.

* * *

The silence weighed so heavily between them, Ruby felt like she was being pulled down by chains. The tightness in her throat wasn't different from how the collar once felt.

Rubbing her scarred hands together under the table, Ruby leaned forward. "Sir…?"

"Just… don't." Mr. Smith shook his head, his eyes red. "What you did to him is unforgivable."

Furrowing her brow and looking down to hide her watering eyes, Ruby nodded. "I know."

Sighing heavily, Mr. Smith spoke again. "I wanted so badly for you to pay for what you'd done. I… I felt cheated when the news came out that you killed yourself after what you did."

Ruby kept her head down. The more she pieced together what happened after everything went downhill, the more she realized that the public, and even the poor students' parents, were told a very different story. She was described as a school shooter who killed her boyfriend before going after a classroom and eventually herself.

"Seven years… thinking you got away with it. Only to find out you were alive?" Mr. Smith's voice was heavy and unsteady. She could hear his heart beating heavily and upon glancing up, she saw his eyes were watering as well. "To be honest, I was furious at first. My son was murdered by a monster and she was still alive? She deserved to be put through fucking hell."

Unable to trust her own voice, Ruby nodded.

She rubbed her hands together to keep herself from digging her claws into her palms.

"But Ruby…"

It was the first time he used her name. She met his watery eyes, unable to keep her own from shedding tears.

"Ruby, what they did to you was terrible too. The more I saw the videos, the more I felt my anger turn into pity." Mr. Smith gestured towards her. "You're what? Twenty-four?"

"Twenty-three."

"God…" Mr. Smith pinched the bridge of his nose. "You're just a kid. And you went through that shit at fifteen? I… I still remember how you blushed and got all nervous when Peter brought you home for dinner. How you were polite. How you helped clear the table. How… how nice you were…"

He stood up. "Ruby… I can't. I can't forgive you for what happened."

"I understand." Ruby heard her response come out breathy and unsteady.

"Hey." He put a warm hand on her shoulder. "I don't wish anymore harm on you. You've been through enough. Just… just let me grieve this and process this."

And he was gone.

* * *

Belle sighed, remembering how hard Ruby cried when she got home after talking to Peter's father. They eventually talked again a year later. It was on civil terms. He still couldn't get past what happened, but he was happy to hear about the progress Ruby was making with her food business.

Dorothy's aunt and uncle refused to talk. Merida was able to meet up with them once. They were surprised by how Merida found it in her heart to forgive Ruby. They themselves still weren't ready and they didn't want to see Ruby.

A knock caught Belle's attention.

She looked up to see Esmerelda at the office doorway. "Did you get to talk to the guy about the contract?"

"Yup." Shaking off the train of thought, Belle gathered the files into a folder and stood up to hand them over. "It's all good. We can start working on the expansion next week."

"Excellent!" Esmerelda accepted the files with a smile. "And about time, too. I was getting worried about how crowded things are getting here. After this, I think we should also start thinking about opening another branch or two."

"I think I know some areas that would be great locations for a new branch. And I've also been in contact with Aurora's grandmothers again since there's land they're willing to donate."

Esmerelda's eyes widened. "More land from them? Really?"

"They seem invested in our vision." Belle said. "I think they'd been wanting to do something like this for a long time but couldn't work things out concretely."

Admittedly, the fairies' generosity was overwhelming, and it was surprising how they continued to refuse any offers to work directly with the organization. They seemed content to stand back and let Belle and Esmerelda take the lead with their projects.

Esmerelda used to hold suspicions towards the fairies, wondering if they had ulterior motives for investing so much money. But as the years passed and the fairies continued to stay otherwise uninvolved, Esmerelda grew to accept their donations as genuine contributions with no strings attached.

"Well that's great then! Keep me posted. As for me, I went through another round of interviews and there are a few promising candidates." Esmerelda's eyes lit up as she started to share her own updates. "Lilo Pelekai grew up near a facility in Hawaii and spent a good chunk of her childhood helping to hide and care for subjects who would escape."

"I think I remember hearing about that facility. It was the badly managed one, right?" There was tension between the partner owners before it eventually shut down, leaving the island with a bunch of psychics and supernaturals to deal with. A few were transferred to other facilities while others were successfully rehomed and rehabilitated.

"Yes, that's the one." Esmerelda said, "With her was her college roommate, Mary Gibbs, who seems to prefer the nickname Boo."

"Boo?"

Esmerelda nodded. "Boo. She's a bit like you, Aurora and Jane. Took courses studying the supernatural. But she dropped out when the whole Baelfire thing went down. From there, she, Lilo and a few friends actually helped house a few escaped subjects. They mentioned letting your friend Elsa and her sister stay with them a few days. They also run a blog about supernaturals, focusing on the human side. It gained a boom of a following during that Baelfire incident. Monetizing it helped them house lost supernaturals."

"They sound perfect!"

"They said they had ideas for how they can help and-" Esmerelda stopped herself. "Wait, I've been keeping you here too long. You have that birthday party planned tonight, don't you? Emma and Aurora were already wrapping up their work while I was on my way here. They haven't stopped talking about how excited they are."

"Yeah, Ruby apparently has some event planned at the diner to celebrate." Belle rolled her eyes as she shut down her computer and gathered up her things. "I honestly don't know why she's being so  _extra_  about this particular birthday.

"Just go and have fun. We can talk again next time." Esmerelda made way for Belle to exit her office.

As she made her way to the parking lot, Belle couldn't help but feel proud of how far things had come, five years after the whole Baelfire debacle of 2017. The court proceedings had been difficult of course, and Gold refused to go down without a fight. Whale was difficult too, but nowhere near as much of a headache as Gold. Tamara got off with the mild punishment of a fine and community service. Nobody had heard from her since. Gold and Whale were both behind bars and hopefully would never be seen again.

Other facilities gradually closed down throughout 2018, but a few still remained to this day, albeit now with major restrictions and monitoring. Just like the one Ruby went to regularly for her checkups before and after the full moon.

Following the fall of Baelfire, Belle worked with Esmerelda, Aurora and Emma, founding an organization that provided housing and rehabilitation for supernaturals who were released from facilities like Baelfire; foster care for orphaned supernaturals; as well as counseling and training services for those struggling with their abilities.

Esmerelda and Belle did majority of the administrative work, but they both made sure to spend time with and develop relationships with their patients and clients.

"Belle, finally!" Emma had the gall to sit on the hood of Belle's car. The poor thing would need a good cleaning and apologizing to. "Aurora and I were starting to figure out how to break into your car and drive it to the diner ourselves."

"My offer to carpool with you two meant that  _I_  would be driving." Belle shooed Emma off the hood before caressing the abused surface. "And I'd rather survive the ride to the diner, please."

"Come  _on_!" Aurora rolled her eyes as she opened the door and climbed into the back seat, "I can drive stick shift now! Mulan and her dad made sure I learned it."

"My car hasn't forgiven you for what you did to her five years ago."

"Dude, just get a new car. You should be able to afford it." Emma plopped into the passenger seat and banged the door closed, making Belle wince.

"Sshh." Belle put one finger to her lips while using her free hand to pat the dashboard. "She can hear you."

"Y'know even if I can learn to drive a manual car, Belle can't grow any taller." Aurora jabbed from her spot behind Belle.

"Harhar." Belle tried to sulk but couldn't stop herself from smiling. It was good to still be able to trade friendly blows with Aurora until now. Even if most of their jabs were getting very old and overused. "And I still don't get why we're making such a big deal about me turning twenty-six. Why the big bash? And isn't it more financially beneficial to throw a paid Open Mic event at the diner instead of making it a private gig to celebrate me being a year older?"

"Oh come on. Just stop questioning it and be pumped about it!" Emma insisted.

"And we've been working so hard lately, aren't you excited to just take a break?" Aurora added.

Well Aurora wasn't wrong. Belle and Esmerelda had been hard at work preparing to expand the business since they were taking on more cases than their current base could handle. "I guess you have a point."

"Oh! I have another reason for us to celebrate!" Excitement burst through Emma as she said, "Did I tell you guys I've been clean for more than a year now? Last week was the 365th day."

"That's great!" Belle kept her eyes on the road as she recalled the incident last year when Emma's drinking escalated into a problem that almost drove Regina away. From there, they all pitched in and made sure any meetups and reunions would be completely alcohol-free. "Things with Regina are better?"

"Much better." Emma nodded. "I still get nightmares and shit, but making the effort to talk things through with Regina and our counselors has been good for me."

"Work isn't getting to be too much for you, is it?" Aurora asked.

"Well it gets hard sometimes, yeah. And the counselors aren't too crazy about me continuing to work cases when I'm not in the most peak mental health."

"Esmerelda and I have doubts of course," Belle kept her eyes on the road but continued to be part of the conversation. "But I also see how working with the kids helps you almost as much as it helps them."

"Exactly!" Emma said, "I mean I'm feeling clearer now and more focused and driven and shit. And that kid, 815, he finally chose a name. He responded to Henry yesterday and it was the fucking proudest moment of my life. Like… these are things we live for, you know? Things to be sober and present for."

Belle nodded. "Things aren't perfect. But being able to focus on the victories, being able to see the lives we change, the spirits we lift… that's reason enough to keep doing what we do."

"Yeah. A kid I was working with told me the other day that he was able to use his abilities to visit his overseas father in their dreams last night." Aurora's smile could be seen from the rearview mirror. "He was so happy and thankful. I kind of froze up at first and didn't know how to tell him how happy I was to hear that."

"It's amazing, isn't it?" Belle felt her hear swell with feeling. "How far we've come? How we went from being unsure if we should trust each other to… to family."

"I'm the prettiest sister in this family, right?"

Classic Emma using her humor to break up the sentimental moments.

And Belle was honestly thankful for it since she wasn't ready to start tearing up on the drive to Granny's Diner. Even if she still didn't understand why this birthday party was being talked up as such a big deal.

* * *

Blinking and trying to tilt her head back to shift stray strands of hair away from her face, Ruby pulled the last batch of cookies out of the oven while Tiana monitored her signature gumbo.

"How's it going over there, Ruby?"

"All good." They smelled perfect enough to make Ruby's mouth water.

"And you?" By the playful tone, Ruby didn't have to look behind her to know that Tiana was smirking. "Are  _you_  all good for tonight?"

With a nervous laugh, Ruby headed for the kitchen doorway. "More or less!"

Leaving Tiana's chuckle behind, Ruby brought the cookies over to the tables they'd set aside as the buffet.

Knowing that Emma was on her way, Ruby had a feeling the cookies weren't going to last long.

"Ruby, can we-"

"Boys, wait for Belle and the others to arrive." Mrs. Dunbroch's stern tone sent the triplets sulking away.

They were definitely taller with each visit and now that they were eighteen, Ruby had to get used to being the one looking up at them instead of the other way around. Even if their time in the facility left them small and scrawny when they first got out, they were filling out nicely as they got older. Ruby could see how they were starting to acquire their father's massive frame.

Already, they were towering over Neal and Killian as they finalized setting up the sound systems.

"I do have to admit that your cookies smell delicious." Mrs. Dunbroch threw a longing glance at the tray. "You've really nailed down a winning recipe." She stifled a yawn, which reminded Ruby that the Dunbrochs must be feeling jetlagged, having arrived just earlier this morning.

"Thanks!" Ruby remembered to respond to the compliment. "I used to make these with Granny all the time."

It took several tries to recreate Granny's special recipe, and now it was one of the diner's bestsellers. Often ordered with milk or vanilla ice cream.

Granny would be proud, right?

The thought hit Ruby out of nowhere, as it sometimes did while working at the diner.

Throwing a quick smile at Mrs. Dunbroch before stepping away, Ruby focused on steadying her breathing. This wasn't the best time to dwell on the grief and guilt she still felt whenever Granny came to mind.

If things had been different, she would be the one people were complimenting about winning recipes. She would be the one bantering with customers and making recommendations.

Still… She would be proud of the diner and she would be proud of her granddaughter, wouldn't she? Ruby liked to think Granny was pleased with how far Ruby had come. With how she'd managed to get through all the pain, fight away the demons and climbed her way up to the point where she could honestly say she was doing okay.

Would she approve though of Ruby's plans for tonight's event? Was it a good idea?

It wasn't too soon, was it?

"Ruby, you okay?"

Pulled out of her thoughts, Ruby saw Merida peeking into the restroom. There were bags under her eyes from the long flight, but the rosy tint to her freckled cheeks still brought life to her face. Tiredness considered, Merida looked good. Her hair had grown out to frame her face with thick curls and a fiery red that never failed to turn heads.

"Yeah. Just… have a lot on my mind." Ruby bit her lip. "And… I can't help but wish Granny would be here to see."

"Hey…" Merida walked over to put her hands on Ruby's shoulders. "I'm pretty sure she's been keeping an eye on you, after all this time. She's proud of you, okay?"

"Yeah." Ruby nodded. "You're right.

"I'm proud of you, too."

"I'm nervous." Ruby admitted. "And a little scared."

Merida squeezed Ruby's shoulders. "I believe in you, you know that, right?"

Ruby nodded.

"But if you don't think you're ready, this can always be done another time. Maybe a less public setting." Concern shown through Merida's eyes. "We can always turn back if you don't feel ready."

Ruby shook her head. "No. I want to do this. I'm ready."

* * *

By the time they got to the diner, there was already a small crowd of familiar and vaguely familiar faces. The lights were dimmed, bringing focus to the spotlights trained on the area where tables were cleared to setup a makeshift stage with a mic.

Belle recognized Elsa's song before seeing Elsa herself.

"Let it-" Stopping mid-song, Elsa pointed towards Belle. "The birthday girl is here! Let's give her a hand, everyone!"

The spotlights shifted from Elsa to completely blind Belle while the crowd cheered and clapped. A few wolf whistles obviously came from Killian and Neal.

"Okay… um…" Feeling put on the spot, Belle squinted against the light and managed to smile. If only she could properly see who had come here instead of having to struggle to make out everyone's faces. "Thanks for coming, everyone. I can't take any credit for the planning that went into this though. Ruby and Tiana were in charge of all this and-"

Belle waited for the round of cheers to die down.

"-and I hope you all enjoy the evening!"

More cheering followed, before Neal finally directed the lights back to the stage.

Tiana was near the door, looking like she was shaking hands with people, playing the part of a good host welcoming the guests.

But where was Ruby?

"Belle!" The familiar warm voice startled Belle more than the embrace did. "Happy birthday!"

"Papa, what are you doing here? I thought you had to watch the shop tonight!" Belle leaned into her father. "Not that I'm complaining about seeing you here!" It was a pleasant surprise.

"How could I miss this big birthday bash? Ruby made sure I'd be here."

"That was… nice of her." Belle's brow furrowed as she pulled away to look Papa in the eye. "Are there any more surprises planned?"

"Ruby and I didn't talk much about birthday surprises." Papa answered with a smile that looked awkward and sheepish.

Initially after the whole Baelfire incident, Papa was suspicious of Ruby and tense around her. But as the years went by, they grew comfortable with each other. Recently, they'd even started to banter. Ruby would sometimes comment about the flower scents that surrounded Papa while he would teasingly talk about plans to leave random flowers in their apartment.

And sometimes he actually  _did_  leave flowers in obscure places. Ruby in turn would randomly leave small boxes of cookies in Papa's shop.

Their relationship was good now, but they'd been even closer than usual lately. A few times in the past month, Belle was pretty sure Ruby had been on the phone with Papa.

"What are you two planning?" Belle asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Just for you to have a memorable birthday." Papa kissed her cheek before gesturing towards the buffet. "Go and grab some food!"

"Good idea! I'm starving!" Emma interrupted before Belle could protest.

Rolling her eyes and growing more suspicious, Belle allowed herself to be dragged over to the buffet by Emma and Aurora.

And that was where she was surprised to see the Dunbroch triplets.

Harris grinned at her. "Hi, Belle!"

"Wait, I thought you guys wouldn't be flying over until later this week for the Christmas Reunion?" Belle hugged the three boys, "And can you please stop growing? You're all making me feel so  _tiny_!"

"At least I can drive manual now."

"Dammit, Aurora, do I need a ruler to prove you're like  _just_  an inch taller?" Belle gave Aurora a playful nudge.

"We couldn't miss your birthday!" Harris answered. He wore a bold haircut, with the sides shaved and the top long, curling over his forehead and touching his cheekbone.

"We got an earlier flight when we heard about the Open Mic night." Hubert added. His look was more sharp and smart, with close-cropped hair and a button down shirt.

"Besides, this is one party we would  _not_  want to miss!" When his brothers stared at him, Hamish's face reddened as he stammered out a continuation. "It… because… well we've been looking forward to having a rap off and this open mic night is like the perfect opportunity!"

Hamish's look was more laid back in contrast with his brothers. His hair was growing out a little long, and he was comfortable in a regular T-shirt and jeans.

It was interesting to see them looking more distinct as they got older and grew into their own people.

It was also interesting to know that so many people were involved in this birthday celebration.

"What is Ruby planning?"

"Talk to you later, we gotta get ready for our rap battle!" Harris put his arms on his brothers' shoulders and pulled them away. "Happy birthday again, Belle!"

Now convinced that Ruby was planning something, but still at a loss for what incredible surprise was coming, Belle turned to look at Emma and Aurora, who were sporting tight smiles.

"What's Ruby planning?"

"What do you mean?" Emma shrugged. "I don't know what you mean." She grabbed a cookie and stuffed the entire thing into her mouth.

"Aurora?"

"Where do you usually wash your car? I'm planning to have Mulan's car washed this week." Aurora awkwardly changed the subject.

"Oi, birthday girl!" Merida came into view. "How have you been?"

"Good." Belle hugged Merida. "Happy to see you but very confused."

Merida's smile looked smug. "Good to know you're doing good then."

Before Belle could attempt to question anyone further, Elsa came into view and kissed Merida then turned to Belle. "Happy birthday, Belle!"

"Thanks, Elsa. Great song, by the way!" Belle reminded herself to be polite despite her growing confusion. She looked around at Emma, Aurora, Merida and Elsa. They all looked like they knew what was going to happen tonight.

Not knowing was driving Belle insane.

"What is Ruby planning?"

"Just enjoy the party, you suspicious thing, you." Emma patted Belle's shoulder. "Have some food!"

Belle raised an eyebrow. "So Papa is here. The Dunbrochs and Elsa are here. Is there anyone else here who I'm going to be surprised to see?"

On cue, someone covered her eyes.

They weren't the rough hands Belle knew to be Ruby's. So who could this be? There was no scarring on the left, which would be the case of Mulan. It couldn't be Regina either because that would be completely out of character for her to do.

"Um… Anna?"

"Really?" The offended tone to her voice was a dead giveaway.

"Ariel?" Belle turned to see the dark red hair and bright smile. "When did you get here?" Pulling Ariel into an embrace. "Last time I saw you was when you were in town for that conference!"

Even though the Dyad Institute was also gone, Ariel still worked in Canada, for a new facility that was working to rehabilitate Dyad's victims. Ariel's work also crossed over into helping the spread out population of people Anita had turned during the time she ran loose.

"I wouldn't miss your birthday!"

"You missed it last year."

Ariel pouted. "I told you work was hectic that month!"

"Okay, but I'm serious." Belle pressed. "What's the big deal about tonight? What is Ruby planning?"

Everyone engaged in their own absurd ways of avoiding the question.

* * *

It was almost time.

Ruby just had to get herself together and stand in front of the crowd of people who came to be here for Belle and for Ruby herself.

"So as most of you know, I've been bros with Neal for like the longest time, right?" Killian was still on stage, attempting standup comedy. Most of his jokes so far were pirate-related if not self-depreciating. This latest one seemed to be regarding something else. "And one time, we were having dinner together. No homo, right? We're bros and we've done it before. We were feeling cheap that night so we just figured we'd share a spaghetti dish."

He paused.

"Well you can imagine how platonically that played out. We'd all seen Lady and the Tramp, right?"

There were scattered chuckles among the crowd. "And that's basically how I accidentally kissed my best friend and ended up going full homo with him. Love wins, everybody!"

Cheers accompanies this announcement.

Ruby peeked over the counter to see Killian gesturing Neal to come over while the audience clapped.

Killian proudly shared this story last time Ruby had lunch with them. And now, just like last time, Neal just rolled his eyes and shook his head before Killian took him by the scarf and pulled him in for a kiss.

There were a lot of people here. The Dunbroch family. The Li family. Aurora's grandmothers, even. Just to the side, smiling and nodding to people were Tarzan and Jane. Tiana was linking arms with Naveen and talking to Anna and her husband Kristoff. Sitting at a table close to the stage were Anya and Dimitri. By the buffet, Belle was talking to Emma, Aurora, Merida and Elsa.

So many people.

And the most important person of all, Belle, hadn't seen Ruby yet.

With enhanced hearing, Ruby could hear Belle trying to ask what was being planned for the night while everyone around her sidestepped the question or attempted to change the subject completely.

"Ruby, are you okay?"

Turning to see Mulan, Ruby smiled stiffly. "Yeah, more or less."

"It's scary as shit, it really is." Mulan folded her arms across her chest and leaned against the kitchen counter. "But it'll be worth it." A small smile ghosted over her lips. "Really worth it."

Glancing at Mulan's wedding ring, Ruby recalled how happy the whole night was. How Mulan and Aurora practically glowed as they danced in each other's arms. How Shang gave a heartwarming speech of complete pride and love for his sister and new sister-in-law. How Mr. Li, still weak but in much better condition than in previous years, had a brief dance with his daughter. Aurora's parents had been a little awkward, but still supportive. The Dunbrochs were ecstatic. Emma of course got pretty drunk that night, but she was relatively harmless.

It had been a good night.

Ruby wanted that for herself but was terrified of screwing it up.

"What if I mess up? Forget the stuff I was going to say? Or… or worse." What if the words got caught in her throat again, just like they used to? What if she found it difficult to speak? What if she just stood there in silence, unable to talk at all? What would everyone think? What would Belle think?

Or what if the utter panic triggered the wolf?

Ruby wouldn't ever forgive herself if she hurt anyone tonight.

"Ruby." Mulan met Ruby's eyes. "Breathe, okay?"

Releasing the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding, Ruby focused instead on inhaling and exhaling. She steadied her breathing and hoped her pounding heart would do the same.

"You've got this." Mulan said, "It'll go great. She's crazy about you and she'll be  _thrilled_. Okay?"

Ruby bit her lip and nodded.

* * *

"The archery classes I teach back home are doing really well." Merida continued to avoid Belle's questions. It was hard to be rude and push for answers so Belle resigned herself to listening to everyone's updates. "I've even partnered with a swordfighting club. We hosted our first medieval-themed event last summer."

Any other time, Belle would be thrilled to hear how her friends were doing.

But it was hard to focus when she was still trying to figure out what Ruby was planning. Was she going to announce a new development with the diner? Was she going to take the mic and give some heartwarming speech to honor Belle? Did she get them a dog? They were talking a few nights ago about how much they loved playing with their neighbor's new litter of Dalmatians. Maybe they were adopting one of the puppies?

Ruby did seem like she was getting pretty attached to Lucky, the smallest in the litter.

"It was during that big event that Elsa attended and we kind of had our first kiss." Merida continued, pulling Belle's attention back to the conversation at hand. "So we were sparring and ended up locking swords. That's when Elsa, the sneaky devil, went in for a kiss. Completely distracted me! Caught me off guard, she did. From there she took me down of course."

Elsa put her hands up defensively. "You were more experienced! Of course I had to get a little creative."

"Didn't say I wasn't thankful for it, love." Merida kissed Elsa's cheek.

"Oh stop it, you." Elsa blushed, then tried to direct attention away from herself and Merida. "How about you, Regina? How's it going with your studies?"

Looking over at Regina wrapped up in Emma's arms, Belle could see that the woman looked frazzled and drained. Still, she was able to smile as she answered, "It's going well. Stressful, but not terrible."

"You're the top dog in your class, why aren't you bragging about that?"

"Emma-"

"Hold up." Shang raised his hand. "Does this mean you're the boss ass bitch everyone's scared of or… you've got the highest grades?"

"Both." Emma answered before Regina could speak.

"Thank you for your contribution, Miss Swan." Regina rolled her eyes before shifting to a more sincere expression. "On a more serious note, we're grateful to you all for making this an alcohol-free event to accommodate us."

Tiana shook her head, "It was no trouble, really. Ruby insisted on it and I was only too happy to agree."

"Tiana?" If anyone really knew what was planned for tonight, it would be Ruby's business partner. They developed this gig together, didn't they? "Would you mind if I asked if Ruby's planning anything? Why hasn't she come by to say hi yet?"

The same knowing smile spread over Tiana's face. Everyone wore it whenever Belle attempted to get information out of them.

"It'll happen when it happens." She pointed in the general direction of the kitchen. "I think I saw Naveen heading into the back room. I'll go and check on him. Don't really trust him alone in the kitchen."

Belle pursed her lips before turning to face the remaining group still lingering by the buffet with her. "What's going on?"

"Mulan's doing well at the force." Shang said.

Aurora jumped in. "She seems to be on her way to a promotion even. She took the sergeant's exam a while back and is expecting the results anytime soon."

Nodding, Shang added, "And she said that people seem to really look to her for direction lately. Particularly with supernatural situations. They don't question her past anymore. I've met some of her squad and I see how much they respect her."

"That's great." Belle resigned herself to sticking to the subject of catching up with people. She turned to Neal. "How about you? How's the IT work Mulan got you at the precinct?"

Neal shrugged. "It's a little boring. I actually have more fun lately doing freelance gigs on the side."

"Why don't you do freelance full time instead?" Belle asked.

Rubbing the back of his neck, Neal smiled sheepishly. "I don't think I'd have the self-discipline for that? The regular salary and hours at the precinct helps me stay on track. Plus it's kind of nice being on the right side of the law now? I like being able to help Mulan and her squad when they're having trouble tracking people down."

* * *

The Dunbroch brothers were finishing up a rap battle in which Ruby understood probably only a total of two words. One of which being " _yo_ ".

"As we come into the moment of utter epicness tonight," Harris said, "It's time we call the attention of our birthday girl."

"Belle, if you could just come up to the edge of the stage over here," It was Hubert's turn to speak. Ruby could imagine Belle making her way through the crowd to stand where the boys were directing her. "A very special lady will be taking the floor for your birthday present."

It was time.

Heart jumping up to her throat, Ruby exited the kitchen and made her way to the makeshift stage where Harris handed her a microphone. Her shaky hands just barely managed to maintain a solid grip.

Belle's expression was utterly confused.

Nervousness burned through Ruby, overwhelming her, crashing over her, blanketing her, suffocating her. The words got stuck in her throat and wouldn't come out. Her chest shrank into itself. Her voice was gone. Breathing was difficult.

Merida was the first to rush over to Ruby, placing hands on her cheeks to pull her back to the present.

"Hey, Ruby. Look at me." Merida's blue eyes were clear and calming. "Focus on how you feel about her. Focus on how she saved you. How big of a change she made to your life. Focus on how she's your hero."

Swallowing the thickness in her throat, Ruby nodded and mumbled, "…okay."

Merida gave Ruby a quick hug before making her way back to the laptop where Mulan was already preparing the slideshow hooked up to the projector.

Now was the time.

Breathing out, Ruby nodded towards Mulan and Merida, signaling them to show the first picture.

It was an old image, but a powerful one. One that Ruby was going to have to brace herself for. One that hopefully wouldn't be too jarring for Belle to see because it was certainly going to bring up a wave of memories and a mix of emotions.

The picture was a grainy frame taken from Baelfire's security footage. Ruby and Belle sat across each other, a box of pizza on the table, Ruby's bloody hands between them. They were younger, but clearly not healthier. There were bags under Belle's eyes from the stress and lacking sleep. Ruby was even worse off, with her brutally short hair, sunken cheeks and painfully thin limbs.

It was uncomfortable to look at and Ruby couldn't help but run her hands through her now long hair. One hell of a year was what it took to grow her hair back to the length she now maintained. Even five years later, memories of the facility still haunted her when she least expected it. They probably always would.

Rubbing at her wrists, still scarred by the cuffs she wore for seven years, Ruby started to speak. "This… this is a painful picture, but… but honestly… it's a good memory." The words weren't easy to release, but Ruby managed to keep going despite the rapid beat of her heart. "This was the first time we really got to sit and… well I use the term loosely here, but… it was the first time we got to really sit and talk."

Belle had her hand over her mouth, seeming to be caught off guard by the image.

"Belle.. This was the first time in a long time that anyone asked me before doing anything." Ruby felt her eyes grow warm and wet as she remembered the gentleness with which Belle took the tissue and wiped off the blood. "The first time I was given the opportunity to decide whether or not I wanted to allow someone to touch me. And… just… just the way you wiped the blood from my hands… it's such a small thing, but for me?"

Ruby shook her head and rubbed at her eyes. "It was a major shift from what I was used to. It was also the first time in a long time that I ever shared a meal with anyone. Neither of us knew it at the time, but looking back? Looking back, I think this was my first step towards becoming human again."

With her hand still over her face, Belle looked like she was tearing up too. It was hard to read her expression and Ruby felt like her knees were turning into jelly.

Still, she kept going. A nod towards Mulan led to the next slide.

It was a selfie of the whole group at the cabin, taken by Aurora. The night before they were supposed to head to court. There was tension in the air and nobody really felt truly ready, but Aurora wanted to commemorate the moment.

"This group… they're my family." Ruby tried not to focus on how much her hands were trembling. "They're a big part of how I learned to be human again. Mulan helped me stay calm despite stress." Nodding towards the bravest person Ruby had ever known, she added, "She's a true fighter, strong as hell, but really? A lot of her strength is in her quiet sense of calm. Some of my darkest days at Baelfire were less dark when I knew she was assigned to watch me."

Mulan's eyes registered surprise, before shifting into a warm smile.

"And Merida? Merida taught me that I can be forgiven." Ruby would never forget the rage and pain in Merida's eyes when Gold pit them against each other. Never forget the fact that she destroyed lives and broke families.

But if Merida found the strength and love to forgive, then that meant that hope was not lost. "I made terrible mistakes and I'm never going to excuse that. But just knowing that I can be forgiven by someone I've hurt… that I'm allowed another chance… that's a big deal."

Making eye contact with Regina, Ruby continued. "And complementing that, I learned from Regina that I'm not a monster despite mistakes made in the past. That we are more than just the past that haunts us. That we deserve to work towards a better future."

They didn't talk much about it, but on some cold nights, Regina would open up about the abuse from her mother and the murder of her father. It was with Ruby where Regina felt like she could open up about the two major parts of her past that someone could closely relate to.

Emma was always there for Regina if she needed to talk, of course.

But sometimes talking to someone who knew what it was like to accidentally kill someone you loved… someone who concretely knew what that was like… Sometimes Ruby and Regina needed that from each other. Belle and Emma understood that, even encouraged it because bottling these things up just never worked out.

It's what worsened Emma's drinking after all.

Looking over at Emma, Ruby continued with her speech. "With Emma, I learned to be strong despite my fear. I learned to keep trying to push forward and relearn everything I'd forgotten even if I was afraid. Afraid of messing up. Afraid of hurting someone. Afraid of getting locked up again. Emma has this way of spitting at fear's face and just barreling through things. I admire that."

Then Ruby looked towards Aurora. "And Aurora helped me learn to enjoy life and be alive during the waking moments instead of dwelling on the night terrors." Aurora grew up fearing sleep and the night. She was at peace with that now, but the drive to make the most of a day still remained, and Ruby had enjoyed that about her.

"The Dunbroch boys?" Ruby smiled at the triplets as they hooted and clapped. "You guys taught me what it's like to have younger brothers to play with, be funny with and feel just a little protective towards." She pointed at them, "You tell any girls who break your heart that they'll have to face me and Merida, alright?"

The boys laughed in between voicing their agreement.

"And Mr. and Mrs. Dunbroch…" Ruby looked towards them. They were linking arms and smiling proudly. Even if they didn't stay long after the court cases wrapped up, Ruby still spent enough time with them to start seeing them as her parental figures. They still kept in touch online and Ruby often found herself messaging Mrs. Dunbroch for advice more often than not. She was actually the first person Ruby told about her plans for tonight.

"You two taught me what it's like to have a mother and a father who truly love those in their care." Ruby said, "I grew up without feeling much love from my biological mother. It was a cold house after Granny was taken away…" It still tightened Ruby's chest to think about Granny's passing. "So it was a real change for me to see actual loving parents and… and I see you as parental figures. I respect and love you both so much."

Wiping at her eyes again, Ruby looked at Neal and Killian. "Neal… you taught me how possible it is to build a new life and be whoever I decide I want to be." She still looked up to how he managed to go from being Gold's son to being a juvenile engaging in petty crime and now to someone who worked in a police department.

"And Killian? You taught me the value in just having fun once in a while. Let me know when our next game night is going to be, okay? I still have to get back at you for beating me last time!"

"Soon enough, Rubes!" Killian said.

Ruby nodded towards Tiana. "And I really appreciate you, Tiana. For helping us out when we had no place to stay. For working with me to build this place. For being such a patient friend when I got flustered and confused." She looked towards Anya, Dimitri and Esmerelda. "And thank you, Anya, Dimitri and Esmerelda. Thank you for taking a chance on us and fighting for us."

Ruby smiled at all the people who helped her reach this point, before taking a deep breath and… finally looking at Belle.

"Belle?" Ruby's heart was pounding so loudly it just about drowned out the soft music Neal was playing. "Belle, you taught me what it's like to love and be loved wholly and completely."

* * *

Seeing the pictures and seeing Ruby now in front of a stage full of people, Belle felt herself tearing up at how far they'd come. She could still remember first seeing Ruby before the full moon forced her into her wolf form. Before Gold beat and shocked the starving wolf into submission.

They had come such a long way.

"I don't mean to make this night about me." Ruby continued. "This is Belle's birthday after all."

Scattered hoots and applause followed this.

"But I also want to give credit where its due and thank the whole community that helped me reach this point." Ruby signaled for Mulan to show the next slide. A selfie of Ruby and Belle, six months after being free. Ruby's hair was growing out. Strands stuck out at odd ends, framing her face in a wild, jagged style.

"Belle, remember one of our first nights after we got out of the facility?" Ruby's teary, shiny eyes met Belle's own. "When you told me that you wanted me to reach the point where I wasn't my mother's Ruby or Gold's Ruby or anyone's Ruby. Just... my own Ruby.  _Ruby's_  Ruby. Remember that?"

Belle nodded.

"I think I can say that I've just about gotten to that point, and it's all thanks to you and our wacky family of psychics, shapeshifters and miscellaneous nerds." Ruby grinned at Emma, referencing the line she liked to use when enumerating their group.

"The first couple of months were hard, yes." Ruby continued. "The changes were overwhelming. On some nights, I, wildly enough, wanted to be back at the facility where even if things were painful, at least they were familiar. It was a rough start and I was struggling. And yet, you stood by my side through all of it, Belle. You were there for me every step of the way. But what I'm really grateful for is the fact that you were patient with me but didn't coddle me."

Belle wiped at her eyes as Ruby continued to speak.

"You pushed me into delivering food and catering for your org with Esmerelda." Ruby's sheepish smile accompanied the memories, "Even if I was really nervous about it and whined about it a few times. You pushed me to keep at it. Until I started delivering to Anya's officemates too. Then that progressed into teaming up with Tiana and selling at food fairs. And, well… Granny's Diner happened and the rest is history."

The next picture was a candid shot of Belle, reading a book and oblivious to Ruby photographing her.

"Belle… you're a hero." Ruby said. "You're  _my hero._ "

Heart swelling with emotion, Belle felt overwhelmed as Ruby continued to speak.

"You've been a major part of my healing, but you're more than that." Belle's cheeks were heating up and butterflies were swarming in her stomach as she listened to Ruby carry on with her speech. "You're someone to watch movies with and fawn over the main couples with. You're someone who can read a book and make it sound really damn engaging. Someone who can talk at length about literary history from Shakespeare to George Orwell to JK Rowling and still manage to accidentally forget your phone in the refrigerator."

Belle laughed at that, recalling the time she spaced out and couldn't find her phone, only to find it in the dessert drawer. This has admittedly happened more than once.

"Someone who vocalizes in the shower but will blush and hide during karaoke night."

This triggered another fresh wave of heat to Belle's cheeks. She was pretty sure she was redder than tomatoes by now.

"Someone who will patiently help someone who struggled to use a spoon and fork, and be firm enough to convince them to try building a business out of cooking and baking. Someone who will always try to see the good in people. Always try to help people. Someone who's selfless, with a heart so big, she's willing to risk everything for some broken prisoner in a high-security facility…"

"Belle… you're someone who…" Ruby started walking over to Belle.

Heart pounding, face flushed, Belle was about to lean forward and pull Ruby in for a kiss, only to stop when she kneeled suddenly.

"Someone who I hope to spend the rest of my life with."

Caught completely by surprise, Belle put a hand over her chest and just stared blankly at the ring. It was a humbly sized diamond, and Belle assumed Ruby had invested in it once the diner started earning well.

It took a moment for Belle to finally manage to choke out a "Yes!"

The look of relief in Ruby's face was enough to make Belle tear up. Smiling through wet cheeks, Belle leaned down to kiss Ruby, who then lifted her up and pulled her close.

So much has changed since Belle first walked into the Baelfire Research Center on the Summer of 2017. And now… Belle wouldn't have things any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this Epilogue takes place five years after Chapter 36 and about a year after my Swan Queen spinoff featuring Emma's drinking, titled [Subject 223.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11608446)
> 
> I'm also working on a [Pricefield spinoff for this fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12091227/chapters/27406248), taking place roughly around the initial weeks of the whole Baelfire escape, featuring Max as a subject and Chloe as a guard. It kind of dabbles in how this AU is created as a result of Max's timehopping.
> 
> But yeah, if you're really itching for more of this AU, I have those projects lined up.
> 
> So again, thanks for being here. Thanks for reading this and sticking with me through the one year and dealing with my erratic updates. Y'all are great and I appreciate you and just... thank you.
> 
> Peace out y'all.


End file.
